The Nateland Podcast - 249: #249 Gardening

Episode Date: April 23, 2025

This week, Dusty shoots a Cracker Barrel commercial, Aaron does an all crowd work show, and Brian shows off his great impressions. Then the guys get into the topic of gardening by learning from Dusty the do's and don'ts of growing a garden. Brunt- https://www.bruntworkwear.com/[NATE] Get $10 Off @BRUNT with code NATE at https://www.bruntworkwear.com/[NATE] #BRUNTpod #ad Helix- helixsleep.com/nate Get 20% off sitewide for their Spring Savings Event through April 30th at helixsleep.com/nate. Smalls- Smalls.com For a limited time only, get 35% off plus and additional 50% off your first order when you head to smalls.comand use code NATE. Delete Me: joindeleteme.com/Nate Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/NATE and use promo code NATE at checkout.

All right. Hello, folks. And hey, bear Dusty Slay here. Welcome to the Nate land podcast. Like I just said, I'm Dusty Slay. I'm here with my co-host, uh, Aaron Weber. Hello. And Brian breakfast baits. The most important meal of the day. That's right. Uh, we're excited. I'm here.

I'm wearing this hoodie. This hoodie says Faber Hall. Uh, I feel I don't like it. I like it. I'm wearing it for my friend, Vince. I'm sure he appreciates that. I like the hoodie. What I'm saying is I don't like it. I like it. I'm wearing it for my friend, Vince. I'm sure he appreciates that. I like the hoodie. What I'm saying is I don't like wearing things like this.

There's a crew neck sweatshirt. It makes me uncomfortable, but fabric wise feels very good. Cause you like a V neck, huh? I like a V neck. Yeah. Yeah. I got a V neck on under here. Well, it doesn't kind of cancels out.

If you got a, you got a non V neck on top of it. Yeah, it does. But I was one, cause it, you know, there's a possibility I take this off halfway through, so I just want to go ahead and point it out. Plug it immediately. Uh, Brian's wearing a shirt that says old and cold and, uh, I'm hot. Well, that's the new Nate land merch right there. Just dropped available at natebargetzi.com.

Uh, old and cold. That's a Nate joke and the hats, get the hats too. You get the hat on. Brian's like our, our mannequin. Yeah. Real company, man. I show up there like here, put this on. You're old and cold.

That's what we used to say when I worked for Spectracide and people, you'd be at the sales meeting and there would be people wearing Spectracide shirts and be like, Oh, real company, man. Okay. We have Nate Land news and upcoming events. The Steven Rogers half hour special, half of we dropped almost two weeks ago on the Nate Land YouTube channel. And if you haven't watched it yet, go check it out.

It is great. Steven's very funny. Very funny. Yeah. It is great. Steven's very funny. Very funny. Yeah. It's a good special. Yeah. The special is blocked on the Zany's Wi-Fi network. So, you know, some pretty edgy stuff being said in this.

Yeah. Yeah. Steven really challenges the status quo. Yeah. And they're trying to silence them. So. And I like how this is worded. The next one.

Plus, oh, oh, oh, there's no if in it, okay. It says, find some time. I thought it said, if you find some time. Find some time for Aaron Weber's special Signature Dish and Nick Thune's Born Young. We're churning them out here at NAMN. And Stephen Bargotse has a special taping here at the Franklin Theater in November.

Those two shows are sold out. Oh wow, that was quick. So thanks everyone. Also, new Nate Land merch drop. Now available on natebargotse.com. Just click shop at the top. I have, well, Brian has this new hoodie on that says, Oh, we covered that.

Yeah, I knocked that out. I knocked that out a little bit of government. Well, I'm just reading the paper. Stick with us. I've been asked to read. Ron Burgundy. Last thing. OK, some great podcasts. Catch the consumers every Tuesday and don't make me come back there

every Thursday. So there's something for almost every day of the week here, guys. That's right. This week's episode of the consumers. What's your brand? Metamucil? Seemed unnecessary. It did. It came out. I'm sorry. People have been talking in the comments about Aaron being aggressive. I thought I was kidding around. They are. What brand did you do? I actually did pitch men and Musel.

Did you really see take back your mean comments about me? I nailed that one. People are backspacing right now. People have been saying that you've been mean to Brian, but I'm like, it's, we're all having a good time. We're all being mean. We're all having a good time. Yeah.

Um, I sent him a few options. That was one, but we went with chips. Ahoy. Okay. That's good. You like chips. Ahoy. Is it good?

Yeah. You remember those commercials where they were like, can you take a bite without biting a chip? And then they had like a general and he was mapping out the cookie being like, I think we could bite right here. No, I don't remember. I don't, but that sounds like a good memory.

What would you do for a chip? So is that it? No, I don't think so. I think that's what it was. It's like, you can't take a bite without like a man. What would you do for chips? Oh, is that it? No, I don't think so I think that's what it was. Can't take a bite without biting a chip You guys cover chips ahoy once you pop you just can't stop chips ahoy No, but it was a hot episode. So we'll see Yeah, we'll see. I'm sure it was great.

I'm doing it soon. I'm excited. I got my old, my brand picked out. Yeah. What are you going to do? I'm going to do tops, the trading cards. Oh, okay. Yeah. Well, something different.

Baseball cards. Something fun, something accessible to the masses. Yeah. Yeah. Something to bring the women in. I just felt sorry for the person next to you on the plane as you haul all your baseball cards with you. Well, I'll tuck it under the seat.

OK. Anyway. Well, I was gone last week, but I hear that it was a great episode and I was excited. I love Ben Sawyer. I do hate history, but I love Ben Sawyer. So I was happy that you guys did that. I heard it was a good episode. Why don't you like well, people say, people say I'm anti science, but I'm really anti history because I, uh, you know, none of it's true. So you guys know that. Okay. Talk to me enough. You guys know that. Okay. None of it. I'm sure there's some

nuggets of truth in there. Yeah. George Washington maybe existed. Maybe he's on the quarter. Yeah. So that's good enough for me. I mean, I'm sure there's some, you know, there's some accurate things in there. I think last week's episode was good because you weren't here. So that's what I mean. I mean, it worked out well.

The last time I saw Ben, we hung out, we had a cigar. I love hanging with Ben, but, uh, I don't need to get too in-depth with mainstream history I like like alternative history, yeah Mainstream history. Yeah, I like a lot of alleged history Yeah, yeah, we can tell well, that's fair. Yeah, but it was a good episode and we're happy to have you back dusty Where have you been? What do you you been up to? Where were you last week?

I went out to add a show on Saturday night in San Luis Obispo. They call, which they call slow. Uh, and it was great. Really great. Uh, really great town. Great show. I did an hour, 20 minutes and, uh, that's why it was great. It was really great.

And then the next day I drove from there down to LA. And it is an amazing drive. California is beautiful. On the left side of me there were mountains. On the right side was the ocean. About halfway on my drive I stopped at some state park that was a beach. Just went out on the beach, had a little cigar. I think we texted.

Enjoyed myself, yeah. And it was great. And then finally I hit LA and then the traffic got thick and I had to get into driving mode. But it was a great time. I did the Adam Carolla podcast and I had a meeting. I did some things and then I did a show at the comedy store with, uh, Jeremiah Watkins,

a show called, uh, stand up on the spot. What kind of meeting Jeff? Well, uh, you know, just a meeting with a company, just stuff. What kind of company? You know, just, just making some moves out here. Classic LA meeting. You're part of the, you're the Illuminati basically. Well, I'm leery of the Illuminati when I'm out there.

Do you ever tell them that in the meetings just to set the tone early? Well, no, I just, you know, I'm just cool. But I was at the meeting and I asked, and they go, they offered some things to drink, and I just, you know, I'm just cool. But I was at the meeting and I asked, and they go, they offered some things to drink. And I go, well, I know you didn't offer this, but could I have a coffee? And they go, yeah. They go, how do you want it?

And I just said, just black coffee. And then they brought it to me at the beginning of the meeting and there was cream and sugar in there. And I was like, wow, you guys really messed that up. That's the kind of attention to detail that I want people to be paying. You know what I mean? You walk out of the meeting early,

you can't get this right. Yeah. There's no point of talking to you. Come on. You know what I mean? I felt bad because I didn't drink the coffee. I felt like I'm the, now I'm the guy going, yeah, I'll take a coffee and then I don't touch it.

Right. When you do these meetings, do you take control early or do you kind of sit back and let them do the talking? It just depends. I like to imagine you walking in, sitting at the end of a conference table, elbows on the table and you go, here's how it's going to work. And they're like, we don't even know who you are, but you just control the meeting.

Well, it just depends. If I go with my manager, Judy, Judy really sets the table. Right. And then I call up Judy on the telephone and then now she's in the, in the meeting and then by the time. Right. And then I- You call up Judy on the telephone? And then, no, she's in the meeting. And then by the time- It's a Charlie Daniels song. Oh, that's Trudy.

Yeah, I know. Yeah. I know. Yeah. Okay, but that's good though. And then, you know, Judy will set it up in a way that when I start talking, I'm like, I feel like a real superstar at this point.

Yeah. And no, but I just go in there. Sometimes I don't even know what we're talking about. Right. Sounds like you know what the company was. Yeah, I do. But yeah, sometimes I don't even you know, I don't even I don't know why we're having the meeting. It could easily be a 30 second phone call. Yeah. But you know, they call them, you know, kind of, you know, in person, get to know your meetings, where you go in, you meet. And then it's like, if they have some ideas, if they have some stuff they want to throw your way, they do. And that's what I'm into, you know, I'm into that sort of stuff.

You know, I did a Cracker Barrel commercial a little while back. I heard about that. When is that going to air? I think in May. How about that? That's a national TV spot? I think so, Yeah. Whoa. Yeah. I did not know this. Yeah. What did you have to do? Well, it's, uh, I don't know if I could, you know, really give it all away, but it's, you know, it's a, for the, uh, they have a campfire.

Uh, I think I got some Cracker Barrel jokes on my special on Netflix. Uh, and they, uh, I think they liked the jokes. Cause I don't make fun of Cracker. I make fun of one billboard, but I, then I go on to talk about how much I like Cracker Barrel. Yeah. So I did, and it was in Mount Juliet. So it was a 10 minute drive from my house.

I just cruised on up to the Cracker Barrel and Mount Juliet. Yeah. I don't like, I mean, that's, Cracker Barrel started in my hometown in Lebanon. Yeah. And I should be the one in that commercial, not you. Yeah. You gotta write more positive Cracker Barrel. I mean, what are you doing?

You're right about that, Dusty. You gotta let them know that you like it. That's awesome. With that special, I closed down a Western Sizzling and I got a Cracker Barrel commercial. You should do a Western Sizzling commercial. Yeah, I don't know that they're doing any anymore. And how about after we ate hot chicken at Party Foul,

the company went bankrupt about a week after that video came out. That's true. That is true. We're shutting down places out here. Yeah. Cracker Barrel, sell your stock now. Now, Cracker Barrel is like, they get, they know how to get in there.

See, what's happening with these other companies is they're not embracing me. Cracker Barrel is like, you know what? Let's get this guy to represent the company. Yeah. Okay. So they've got a good chance of surviving. That's what I'm saying. I'm excited to see that. Me too.

They've got a strong business. Yeah, they're doing well. They're doing good. And they got a good chicken and dumplings. Did you get any Cracker Barrel gifts? They give you a rocking chair or anything? No rocking chair. I would like a Cracker Barrel rocking chair and a jumbo checker set. Where they like, all right, let's see. We want you, when we say action, pick up this piece of bacon, start eating it.

No, no, I told him I wouldn't eat it. No pork, no sausage, no bacon. Cause we did have one dish that was shrimp, one dish that was chicken. And I said, I, I won't, you know, I'll eat the chicken, but I won't eat them. He said that while they were rolling. I went ahead and let them like he does on our end. Uh, that's awesome. Yeah, it was good.

And then, uh, and then, so then I came home and then this weekend I was out in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I did Brick Town Comedy Club. Nice. Great weekend. I work on my buddy, Vince Fabra, and we had a good time. Uh, great shows. It's a great club. What does that shirt say? It says Fabra Hall. Then what is it? Well, it's a joke and I don't know. You could interpret it as dirty, potentially. So I don't want to get too into it, but all right. you could interpret it as dirty, potentially, so I don't wanna get too into it. All right. You could interpret it that way, but nothing about it is dirty.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. You can take it off now. If you want. I may take it off. I am hot. So he gave this to me because we were hanging out after the shows and it got a little cold.

Right. And I didn't have a shirt. And he gave me this shirt and I was, so it is warm. It's a bad time of the year to start selling them, but it's, uh, yeah, it's hot around here, dusty sleigh here. Now, let me tell you, before I found brunt boots, I had these old work boots that felt like I was wearing two cinder blocks on my feet. By the end of the day, I'd take them off

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Is that how you say it? I don't know. Is it O-M-A-N? He's loving this. Those the old man. Yeah. He's loving those. Is that how you say it? I don't know. Is it O M A N O H M A N. Oh, man. Oh man. And he's loving those. Yeah.

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heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you. Nate Land. There you go. How about you, Brian? Where were you? I was home this weekend doing some family stuff. Did some Easter egg hunts. Nice. Text to you guys something kind of deep and personal from the heart and got a complete silence

until like eight hours later when Dusty texted a conspiracy video about cats or demons. So appreciate that guys. You can't, that's your fault for getting too serious. I mean, it's not like it was out of the coat. We were having a full chat going and I just took it up a notch and talked about how great a parents. Listen, it was a good text and I didn't know how to follow it up.

Yeah. I didn't know how to follow your, I should have at least reacted to it. I'm sorry about that. Right. Yeah. Not even a thumbs up. Just an exclamation point. Let's settle this out. And have you ever seen the eyes of cats? And I thought, you know what I mean?

Right. Right. Well, thank you for that. I'm sorry. I didn't respond. I got to get better about that. I let dusty sent me a sentimental text too, that I sat on it until you brought it up just now before the podcast. I'll do that and you know it's a it's a flaw. I'm sorry about that. But Dusty didn't respond either so it's on him as well. Yeah. Well I just was like that's a great text. I mean what what I mean I'm gonna cheapen this text now with a thumbs up. Mm-hmm. You were just thinking of me. Yeah. Where were you, Aaron?

I, uh, I had a little bit of a busy week. I was in California last week as well. I had a corporate gig in Rancho Palos Verdes, California, about an hour outside of LA. Look at the view from my hotel room. Wow. I mean, who's the girl down there? Uh, I don't know. I'm sorry. She's in this. She's posing for the photo. She's walking through the gate.

Scroll up a little bit. Posing. She's not posing. She's walking through the gate and I caught her inadvertently. I apologize to that woman. Yeah. It's tough to take a picture of a pool without it looking like you're being weird, but this is the view and you're right, Dusty, just such a beautiful, so beautiful.

I mean, it was incredible. I was brought a J Flake buddy of mine, Nashville comedian. We saw dolphins jumping out in the water. I watched the sunset over the cliff. Apparently this entire city is starting to slide into the water. And I think where's this? This is Rancho Palos Verdes, California. RPV. Slow and RPV. Yeah, slow and RPV. That's where we hang out. I have a theory about that. I can't get into it. Okay. I can't wait till after the pod. But yeah, beautiful, beautiful place. And then I went right from there to Austin, Texas, the belly of the beast

for moon tower comedy festival. That I did a bunch of shows, hung out right around sixth street. Sixth street will take a toll on you after a few days. Pretty tough to catch the audience laughing like that. Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. It took me during anybody's set.

No, it is though. They, when they take pictures, always like some serious people in the audience. This, that's awesome. Yeah, it's going to be dirt. Anybody said. No, it is though. When they take pictures, it's always like some serious people in the audience. This is a great picture. Yeah, I'm killing right here, dude. This is a really fun show that Mike Falzone runs. It's called Surrounded. It's you're in the round essentially, but the crowds right up on you and you can't do any material. It's all just crowd work. And I'd never done a show like that at all. Okay. And had a lot of fun with it.

It's a muscle that I don't use very often. Well, that's what stand up on the spot is that I did at the comedy store. And it's, yeah, it's a challenge. That guy had a Hawaiian shirt on and I go, you got a Hawaiian shirt on, huh? He goes, yeah. I go, hey, why not?

You know what I mean? And it got, I mean, nothing, dude. I thought that was the funniest joke of all time. I've been saying, why not for years? And I've been waiting on a reason to use it. And I was like, this will shut the show down, dude. Why not? You get it now, like Hawaii.

Oh, why not? That's a good one. And so that's the kind of razor sharp wit you can expect for the next 15 minutes. Well, if you've been sitting on that for years, though, that sounds like material. Well, yeah, that's a good point, Dusty. So you cheated. Well, you could also say you've used all those words before a different context. It's like, I speak a different language. Speaks Klingon.

But, uh, thank you to Mike. Thank you to everybody at Moon Tower. A lot of great, a lot of great comics. They're just hanging out. Being in the hotel lobby during a comedy festival is. Crazy. You just see like, okay, Sklar brothers are checking in and then like And then like Janine Garofalo's in there. You did Moon Tower? Moon Tower. Yeah, that's fun. I've done Moon Tower before. This girl on the

bottom left is losing it. Yeah, I'm killing. I don't remember what I'm That's when they started to get Hawaii not, you know, they started to understand what it meant. Yeah, it's a thinker. But the yeah, Moon Tower's fun. Yeah, it's I did it, you know, they started to understand what it meant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a thinker. But the, uh, yeah, moon towers phone. Yeah. It's I did it, you know, five years ago, maybe six years ago, 2019. Oh, nice. But, uh, yeah, I loved it.

And I stopped by the mothership for it. Got to see that. Hang in the green room for a minute and stuff. It's all, it's all very fun to just poke your head in every now and then and be like, I'm out here too. And then go back to Nashville. Oh, you got some love from John Goblokon. Oh yeah. That's your buddy. Yeah. Did a show with him. Yeah. I don't, I don't like goblins. Oh, Mitch Burrow. Yeah. I did that show with Mitch. Mitch did that surrounded show. It's very funny. Mitch Burrow used to do comedy with me back in Charleston. He's one of the first people I ever did comedy with.

Anyway, fun few days. Thank you to everybody I saw. I did a show, Chelsea Lynn. I did the trailer trash, Tammy and Friends. I love those people. I love Tammy and Libby and Jeremiah. It was so much fun. I love them. I love them. So anyway, that's where we've been.

That's where we're going. Let's get into it, man. You want to get into these comments, right? Let's get into it. Dusty, you read them, dude. The comments come from Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Apple Podcast reviews and naitland at natebargazi.com. Jay Quinn creates, Sorry. Jay Quinn creates, the Nate Land podcast is greater than the sum of the host. It gives us a weekly clean, fun, and entertaining show for free.

As long as y'all keep that up, I'm here no matter the lineup each week. Well. We'll see. So, Jay Quinn. We're gonna test that. Jay Quinn is like, I don't care about you guys. Just, uh, be clean, be clean and be free. And yeah, I'll listen.

I get nothing else going on. So nothing like an endorsement like that. Yep. Jay Quinn. Hey, I'll be here. You keep it free and clean. I'll, I'll be here every week, man. I'll create.

It's nice. That's called loyalty. Yeah. Now it is nice. Thank you, Jay Quinn. It is nice. How about this loyalty. Now it is nice. Thank you, Jay Quinn. It is nice. How about this next name? What a great name.

Well, the next name is from King of the Hill. It's called Rusty Shackleford. That's a Dale Gribble's kind of code name. Yeah. Okay. Rusty Shackleford. Halfway through this episode, I had to stop and check if I was still listening to Nate Land. Hearing a highly educated person speak passionately about a subject

they are very familiar with is always good listening. That is not Rusty Shackleford. You need to you need to check your, uh, check your name there, but Thurston, how the third highly educated person speaking passionately about a subject they're very familiar with. Hope you enjoyed it. Rusty. It's going to be a while before that happens. Yeah.

Oh yeah. But it was a nice, nice change. Sometimes I read comments and people are like, they go, I just, I don't know if I can keep listening. Dusty's misinformation is just too hard to listen to. And I go, how weak are you? You know what I mean? How weak are you that you can't hear someone say some things that you don't necessarily agree with?

It's just weak. I don't know if I can do it. I just can't do it anymore. That's just from Brian. Miguel Lava. For the haters in the comments that I suspect is just Brian using pseudonyms, make no mistake that Dusty is the cherry atop this Sunday. Okay. That's what I'm talking about. I became a weekly viewer when he came on board. Congrats, all of you on your success. Now that's

a comment. But is the cherry the best part of a Sunday? I could argue the Sundays just as good without the chair. I throw the cherry away. Yeah, who needs a cherry? It's much hard like this podcast to be. Well, I think it's like, you know, the sundae is good. And then a little cherry on top really lets you know that there was some thought put into it. Okay.

If it's like the coffee with the cream and sugar, it's like, if you're not putting a cherry up there, can you even, do you even know that the sundae was done right? Right. If there's no cherry on there, who knows what else there is. If you're the cherry, what are me and Brian? You're going to be the chocolate fudge, and you're the banana.

Who's the ice cream? I'm the vanilla. I guess Nate's the ice cream, because he's old and cold. Yeah, there you go. Right? Yeah. You guys weren't happy. I don't even know what goes in a Sunday.

Yeah. Well, you nailed it. I think that's what it is. Ice cream bananas. Yeah. Yeah. Is that, is that a banana split? What's a Sunday?

Oh, I thought, yeah, I was thinking banana split. You're absolutely right. Yeah. Sunday is just like a hot fudge Sunday. Yeah. You might have some- You can't just, you can't define a, can't use the word to define a word. Okay.

It's fair. Um, I don't know then. Yeah, I know it when I can't define it, but I know it when I see it. But you seem to eat a lot of them. You guys are like, we hate the cherry, we throw the cherries out. What else is in there? Yeah, I don't like the cherry. It's vanilla ice cream with chocolate on top. And nuts, usually. That's, you're the nuts. Yeah, I am the nuts. I'm with the cherry too though. Okay, you're the nuts of the cherry.

No, Miguel's wrong, you're nuts. Steve Kelly, you can't read in dreams, which is one sure way to check to see if you're in a dream. So that's probably why we would never dream about heavily using smartphones. Is that true? You can't read in a dream. Why do you think that is? I don't know if that's true. You also...

But I don't know that it's not true. Do you know that you never... everybody you see in a dream is somebody that you've seen in real life? I've always heard that. Your brain can't create a new person in a dream. What if you've... What if you've seen some of these AI photos? Does that count? If you've just seen them,

and then like just a picture of them. Yeah, that is weird to think though, because I have dreams sometimes where I'm interacting with people that I have no idea who they are. But those are all people you've seen before. Your brain's seen them at some point. Wow.

That's wild. Yeah, the brain's a magical thing. I had a dream. Well, I can't do it. I have a joke about it. But Matt Gore, can you reheat coffee once it's been made? Yes. I am somehow the only person in my family who doesn't reheat coffee in the microwave.

I think it's gross and disrespectful to the bean. I did it this morning. Well I yeah. Dusty says yes. She put it in the microwave. I don't have a microwave. Right. Dusty gets a campfire going outside and then he holds the cup up over it like a s'more.

Gets a fire going. And then he heats it that way. I have, I would do that. But I have poured it into a pot and just reheated on the stove, okay But I I say just you know, just drink the coffee We Why you letting it get cold yeah, I Had did this morning you sit it down you forget about it or you have to do something unexpected

And then you come back coffee's only hot for a second. You're using the cure. And then it's ice cold. I, I do use the cure. Yeah. See if you're using a pot, this is my theory. Use a pot, make a pot of coffee and then smaller cups. What is, what is the theory?

Well, I guess it's on a theory. Philosophy. That's the way to do it. So you're not sitting with a big cup. Yeah, the pot's staying hot in the pot. Right. That would be a way of doing it. Sometimes in a hotel, what I'll do,

so the coffee's not too strong, I'll have a mug, you know, like a Arctic mug or like a Yeti. Yeah, Stanley. And then you, yeah, or, and you, uh, you brew the coffee one time with the hotel coffee and then brew it again through that same filter and then combine the two. And then you can pour it out into your cup. So it's staying warm in there and it weakens it a bit. Okay. Because some of this hotel coffee is insanely light. It's like, weakens it a bit. Okay. Because some of this hotel coffee is insanely light. It's like, it's not built on taste. It's built

on caffeine. Right. But that's what I'm drinking it for. So it just depends on your goals going in. I like to weaken. Sometimes I'll do half decaf and half regular just so the coffee stays, you know, thick. But I'm not like over caffeinated. And then you take the cup you put in your purse when you leave? Yeah.

I enjoy drinking coffee. Do your drinker get really hot? It gets hot enough. It's not going to burn me or anything. Yeah. I mean, that's what I use and it's hot enough, but then I get like, I was at the airport the day I got a Starbucks and I burned my tongue. It's so much hotter.

Yeah. It's crazy hot. Cause they're brewing it in big quantities. And they're burning it. They might be burning it. But it's a good burn. I mean, I've taken a lot of sips of Starbucks and going, ugh. But you keep doing it.

And tongues, they recover pretty quickly, I've noticed. Tongues do. The tongue's resilient. A few hours later, it's probably gone. Now the top of your mouth, that recover pretty quickly. I've noticed. Tongues do. The tongue's resilient. If it's something two hours later, it's probably gone. But now the top of your mouth, that's another story. That'll get wrecked for days. You bite into a pizza a little too early. That's true. That is true.

Spencer Heaton. So as we all know, Aaron got his drywall bit from dusty. I'm going to stop you right there. I don't even know what you're talking about. See, I don't know either. I read this. So let's back up. I do stand-up comedy. So I have a bit about drywall.

Oh yeah. And I guess this guy thinks I took it from you. That sounds right. We talked about drywall on the podcast. What did we talk? Do you remember what we talked about? Oh no, I mean, I remember that you had a guy come over to your house and he was like trying to fix a leak or something. Yeah.

So that's what the story is about. And he made a bunch of holes in your wall. He cut a giant hole in the wall. And then, uh, I think on the podcast, we talked about me coming over to your house to fix it. And then I never did. Okay. So I, yeah, I'd be curious to know what Spencer means by that.

I definitely did not. He makes it sound like this is your story that I took. But that's not the case. Yeah. I mean, I don't have a, I don't have a drywall story. Matter of fact, I got two holes in my wall right now where I had to get some faucets repaired because I have frost resistant outdoor faucets but apparently if you hook up you mean like spigots yes okay but if you hook up one

of those multi faucets to it in the winter you hear that too you're not you're not calling a faucet Fosset? Maybe. Yeah, faucet. Yeah. Okay. Faucet. Faucet. All right.

All right. My bad. What do you say? My faucet. Faucet? Yeah, F-A-U-C-E-T is how. Faucet. What do you say? You say it like fossil. Faucet. Faucet. Yeah, I don't believe you.

You probably say fooset. Let's come back to it when I'm not thinking about it. That's right. Faucet. Yeah, I don't believe you. You probably say foo-sit. Let's come back to it when I'm not thinking about it. That's right. Sorry about that. I'm sorry to bring the conversation to Screeching Hall. But if you have a multi-faucet on there, it almost like negates your frost resistant faucet. Okay. So it cracked them and now they were leaking a little bit. Brutal. But I don't have a crawl space under my house. I'm going to, I'm going to slap. So the guy had to come over and cut holes in my wall to get to the thing. And he said, I make holes.

I don't fix that. He go, if you tack that on, you're going to get a lot of more work. I think if you figure out how to do that. But he did fix it. By the way, you know, I told y'all when there was a big leak my basement flooded. Mm-hmm. We got the water bill. You want to guess how much water is of two thousand dollars of water. Did they work with you on it though? They helped out a little bit. Yeah. Once I explained the situation to him but not as much as I'd

like. The water company. The water company. They cover half? Geez. Well. Okay, so. How many gallons do they say? No, they didn't tell me the gallon amount. I'd be curious. Because I felt like that was the deal. If, I had heard that, like if they,

if something happened like that. They said you get a one-time reprieve for broken pipes. You'd already used it? No, well it was, this You would get earned. That dollar amount was spread over the course of two different billing cycles. So I paid for half of it already and then the other half they took care of. Okay. Well Spencer as we all know. Do you want me to finish this? Yeah. Okay. So I'd love to know the insider information when it comes to how comedians share ideas for bits.

Is it awkward? Is it common? Is there a website where you can sell ideas for bits? Would love to get a peek behind the scenes. Well, you know, I'm going to say this, Aaron, me and Aaron went to an aquarium one time together and we had a shared experience and then Aaron wrote a joke about that experience and he did it and I liked the joke and then and I had stopped doing it and I watched and I watched for months and Aaron was never doing the joke and I was like, I was like, man, I like that joke. I was like. And I go, what, hey, I go, Aaron,

what are you doing with that aquarium bit? And he goes, I never could really get it to work for me. And I go, can I have it? And he said, yes. I said, I'll trade you all your trailer park jokes for my aquarium joke. So he gave me the joke and I did it. And I went ahead and did it on the Tonight Show. So he couldn't get it back.

And, uh, I remember we were riding to a gig one time together and the song, five o'clock somewhere came on and I was like, this would be a fun joke to tell. And I kind of just started riffing and did the whole song. Broke it down right there in the car. Broke the whole song down. And I recorded it on my phone. That's incredible. And then when I got home I went ahead and did it. Yeah. And recorded it and posted it on the

internet. That's crazy and I had a Cracker Barrel bit eight years ago. Yeah. That's the crazy part. Yeah and I you know I saw you doing it. That's what I do. I go to open mics and see comics doing jokes and I go oh I like that one. But I think the answer it. That's what I do. I go to open mics and see comics doing jokes. And I go, Oh, I like that one. But I think the answer to your question, Spencer, take them. Cause there is parallel thinking a lot. And a lot of us just have this that you just have a conversation with the person and talk through it like that. There's no like rule book.

I actually just had a comic reach out to me, uh, pretty, uh, you know, well established comic, he worked with a friend of mine and my friend heard this guy's closer and he goes, that joke is a lot like Dusty's joke. Wow. And me and the guy had a conversation about it because he reached out to me and I don't, he sent me his and I sent him mine and they are not at all the same joke,

but they are very much the same premise. Okay. And come out the same faucet. And yes, and weirdly very close to the same thing. But when you think about it, I don't want to get too into it because I don't want it to give the joke away, but I just think this guy's a comedian. Yeah. He's doing the same things I'm doing. He, we're, we're having the same experiences out here.

So as unique as that experience might be for someone traveling all the time, it might not be that unique. Right. Yeah. I was about to say who's doing what you're doing out there. Yeah. I guess the travel stuff. Yeah and I just think that and I I mean mine's recorded. It's on the new special. So it's it's not coming. It's not coming down. I can't help you out. Yeah. It's already out there. Dusty puts it out quick. But I, yeah, it is unfortunate.

And I felt weird. Like, I mean, everything is fine. This guy's my friend. But it was like, I was like, oh dang, that's too bad. Yeah. It just happens. It's inevitable. Yeah.

You have a conversation about it. I had a joke recently, a new joke I was trying. And you pointed out that you had a very similar joke. Do you remember that? The joke about sitting? Oh yeah. Yeah. It's on my special on Netflix.

Yeah. Yeah, I've never seen it, but... Well, yeah. About my whole goal is just to move from one sitting position to another. Yeah, but it's like, at the same time, it's like, yeah, of course that's a thought that we're going to have because me and you both are not very active people. We're not trying to do a lot of standing around, you know, we're not, I don't think either of us are trying to get our steps. No.

No. Not at all. So, it is, yeah, I mean it is, you know, it's like, especially when you're hanging out and you go, are you gonna, and a joke comes up and everybody's laughing, you know, it's like, especially when you're hanging out and you go, are you gonna, and a joke comes up and everybody's laughing and you go, are you going to do that bit? Yeah. You think I'm not doing that? Cause I'd like to try. You might want to try that real quick.

Yeah. The syrup in the waffle maker, that was me, but I gave it to Nate because he's such a good storyteller and I couldn't pull it off. So. Yeah. And yeah, I'd like to hear you tell it from the point of view of the guy who did it I know I tried it. I'd like to think I'm a better comic now Maybe I could pull it off. But when I tried it a few times, I just at that time I could never tell True to life jokes and make them stories and make them funny

Especially you guys that can just take it and like do it on stage immediately. Yeah. Some guys are really good at that. I'm not. Why not? You know what I mean? Yeah. Okay. We love talking about our Helix mattresses. I've had my Helix mattress almost three years now. Nate's parents just got one and they love it. Nate's dad said it helps with the sleep apnea. We all have a Helix mattress and we all love it. That's true. I know that people make fun of me when I say that the ad that I go that is true, but I have a helix mattress and I like it. I have the helix pillows and I like them. I find them very comfortable. When guests come over to my house, they sleep on a helix mattress with me in bed and I go, how was it? And they say it was great. They say it's a good mattress.

They go, where can I get some of those pillows too? Yeah. And they go, I have not, I ordered my sister a Helix mattress and they've never slept better. They were, I don't even know what they were sleeping on, but now, now it's better. It improves how I sleep. Everyone knows I love their pillows. We talk about it all the time, But it has helped with my sleep. I'm getting better sleep. Aaron's getting better sleep. And Brian's getting better sleep. Much better. My old mattress was one of those old spring mattresses.

I have a video on YouTube about my old mattress. It's a stand up bit. Very funny. And I finally realized how bad that is for sleep. Helix fixes that issue. It's great for hot sleepers, people with back pain, snores, and people with sleep apnea. It's for everyone. Go to Helix Sleep... You just said that. Call us out and then, hey, it's for everyone. Well Well everyone can get in on it but sometimes you gotta get specific. Yeah yeah yeah. Go to sleep helixsleep.com slash nate for their 20% off site wide for their spring savings event. That's helixsleep.com slash nate for 20% off their site wide. statewide sale ends on April 30th.

Helix sleep.com slash Nate. Okay. Bryce Dorn, not only is Aaron the best ad reader, but he's also the best impressionist. Oh, what impressions? Thank you very much. Was that good? Well, best compared to me and Brian, two guys that do no impressions.

Well, that's all the word. Talking about. That's all the word best works. Yeah. So I'll email right now and I'll do it. Um, Christopher walking. I'm gonna need more cowbell. It's really good.

You didn't even try to do it. I closed my eyes for a second. I thought it was Christopher. That was Christopher walking. I want to be more cowbell. That's how you did it. Just now. I don't even think that is that Christopher walking that does that. more cowbell. That's how you did it just now. I don't even think that.

Is that Christopher Walken that does that? Yeah. That's him in that sketch. Is it him saying it? Yeah. Oh, okay. Got a fever. Will Ferrell's got a fever.

Hold on, hold on, hold on. Do it, do it. I've already done it. I've already nailed it. I want to hear it. My favorite Christopher Walken is from Joe Dirt though. Can you do any of those? I haven't seen Joe Dirt.

Yes. Give me somebody else. I can do any of those? I haven't seen Joe dirt. Give me somebody else. I can do anybody. I just, I don't like Obama. Michelle or Barack. Let's do president Barack. President. Okay. Um, well, is he point? Is he a point? That was a sassy Barack. Well, is he point? Is he a sassy Barack? Well, well, let me be clear. Hear me out. The point is I do good impressions. You guys are jealous. You said throw out anyone. He gave you the easiest one. Arnold Schwarzenegger. Get to the choppa. See, They all seem... I'm killing it! All your impressions seem more feminine than you are.

Right? You get more feminine. Don't say it like that! I'm saying you're not a feminine person. That's right! I wear brunt! But when you do an impression, they get feminine. Get to the chopper! Well, compared to me, Arnold is feminine.

Okay, I'll give you that. Get to the chopper well compared to me Arnold is feminine okay I'll give you that because it's jealous I nailed it three for three all right one more well who you let me finish but go ahead who give me another one well just because this is in the next comment what, what about Billy Bob Thornton from Sling Blade? I've been seeing that has come across my TikTok algorithm. And it is. It is mustard biscuits. There's one with the girl from Snow White being, but it's the voice of Sling Blade.

Gosh, it's so good. They got some mustard biscuits. How much you want, Farron? Yeah. Mustard biscuits. What you got to eat that's good in there. That was pretty good. All right, go ahead.

Oh. Next comment. OK. Tim Stevens, what do you think of the idea of Billy Bob Thornton being cast as Nick Saban for a biopic or something similar? I think the two are total doppelgangers. Well, Billy Bob Thornton can do anything. That guy's amazing. Sling blade doing Nick Saban.

I'm against that. He might be. He's already been a football coach in a movie. Yeah. It's like, how many times do you want to play the same kind of role over and over again? Yeah. I don't see them as doppelgangers. I don't either. I don't know.

I've never thought that, but he could definitely play him if he wanted to. He's really good. Cause Nick Saban's old, man. I was just thinking Billy Bob's old, but Nick Saban's in his seventies. Yeah. You know, Billy Bob's up there.

Mm hmm. Well, you play it. He would play a younger version. I aim to kill you with Things and play the retired Nick Saban he could play a play college game day next day Does those commercials for was it he does Airbnb? I fly Hey, give me some of the big ones. Andy Corwatch. I'm a cop in Wilmington, North Carolina and recently went out of town for training.

The instructor asked who was the most famous person from their city. There was a police officer from Opelika, Alabama. He couldn't come up with a name. I chimed up and said, what about Dusty Slay? And he said, who's that? Well, you tell that guy, I'm going to finish the comment. You tell that guy that the mayor gave me the key to the city. I just wanted you to know that I had your back and the class got a quick

education as to who you are. I'll tell you what though, 20 years ago, the cops knew my name. I bet they did. Are you the most famous person? Well, I guess you are. I don't know. I mean, I don't think of myself as famous. I'm the most public of the figures. Yeah. Yeah. Has anybody else come out of Up Alike?

Is there any other comedians? I don't know. There's a comedian named Jodie Fuller. And there's a guy or girl? It's a guy. There's a musician named Adam Hood. There's a I think there's, you you know an astronaut if you believe in that. Oh yeah yeah yeah we talked about that. There's a baseball player Roy Lee Jackson who's now a pastor in the Auburn area. Okay I think there was a NASCAR driver, a couple of football players TJ Jackson. I love the fact you don't want to admit that astronaut you're like you just glaze over it. Yeah. That's got to be the most famous person from Opel Ica right? Well we don't even we don't want to admit that astronaut. You're like, you just glaze over it. That's got to be the most famous person from Opa-Lika, right? Well, we don't even know his name.

Who? Astronaut. More than Alabama Pitts? They still don't have... Convicted felon who garnered media attention for his attempt to play professional baseball after his release from Sing Sing Prison? This guy looks incredible. They don't even have my name in here. They never... You can never get any respected here on hometown. I'll tell you that I got the key to the city and they can't even bother to update

the Wikipedia. There's James Voss, retired astronaut right there. How about that? There's a real hero. Let's click on him. Yeah. Let's dive into this.

This guy went to space. Raised by his grandparents in Opelike, Alabama. As a child, he read a lot of science fiction. Yeah. And then he went on he read a lot of science fiction. Yeah. And then he went on to be a real life science fiction person. I'm going to have him on.

Science James, come on the podcast. Let's talk about it. Yeah, come on, James. I got, I need the week off. Let me tell you something. If we ever get an astronaut on the podcast and you, and you tap out for it, it'll be pretty upsetting. Well, listen, if you brought like, like, for instance, uh, you brought this guy

that was just stuck in space, John Glenn. Yeah. I wouldn't, you know, John Glenn, you know, he's, he's dedicated himself to this lifestyle and I wouldn't want to, you know, I wouldn't want to try to come at the guy on the podcast. Right. Right. What about Butch Wilmore, the guy who just came home?

Yeah. I'd be very respectful to Butch, even though, you know, but I'd be respectful to him. And so. I mean, that's not saying that much to be respectful. If he was respectful to you, then that would be more impressive. It sure would. You don't think he would be respectful to me? I'm just saying if you supposed to be a Christian man,

but even within Christianity, there's such a thing as. Yeah. Righteous, righteous. Anger. Listen, like James Joyce. There's no astronaut. Going with that perfect game. There's no astronaut like Katy Perry and Gail King.

Let's get them on the park. Yeah. That's what we want on here. Yeah. Okay. Uh, Nicole Chidester. That's a tough name. Sure is.

It's like, it's like, yeah. Took two words, took out a couple of letters, and then smashed them together. Right. Do you see what I'm saying? Yeah, and the last name's tough too. Nicole Chidister. Aaron, I appreciate how often you ask the guys to describe things for those listening. That's what I'm talking about. I used to be an exclusive YouTube watcher of the pod because I love seeing all the visuals and facial expressions. But now that my drive to work is 40 minutes, I usually listen in the car.

You having things described for us make me feel like I'm not missing out on so much. All right. That is nice though. Because there are some podcasts that I listen to that are mainly visual podcasts podcasts and it's hard. It is tough. Or if you're watching a movie, it's tough sometimes too. It's like, guys, tell me what's happening in the scene. Yeah. We bring the funny and you describe what's going on. So, we all have our role.

Nicole Chidester. Do you think that's how it's spelled? Chidester? Chidester. Chidester. Chidester is the most sketchy of the names. She's a Chidester. Yeah. You know what? You guys get where I'm going with this? Yeah, I do. Bart Scarborough. Great name. Tell Dusty to check out lasagna gardening. It's the best. All of his leaves will be a great addition to setting up an amazing garden. That sounds like some kind of compost pile where you're layering things, but maybe not. Lasagna Gardening 101. I've never heard of this. Me either. I like the first half of it.

Well, there's a brief description on the AI. I make a lasagna compost pile. This reminds me, one of the best roast jokes ever. Jeff Ross talking about Jonah Hill. He said, he said, Quentin Tarantino asked Jonah Hill if he wanted to be at a spaghetti Western. He said, you had me at spaghetti. You had me at lasagna, Bart Scarborough.

I'll check it out, Bart. Yeah, some advantages. It's a no dig, no till organic gardening method that results in a rich, fluffy soil with very little work from the gardener. Sounds like something we'd be interested in. Yeah. Fabio Fina. Earth Day is April 22nd. Is that right? Today's April 27th. Tomorrow. Tomorrow will be yesterday if you're listening to the podcast.

Earth Day is April 22nd and Arbor Day is April 25th. Let's get a gardening episode going. Dusty, bring the green thumb wisdom. I'll say though, people, like one time we were talking about trees and a guy said he was really disappointed that I didn't know the native trees of Tennessee. Yeah, right. I think we all were.

This is the thing about me that you gotta understand. I get into things, but I don't get into the details too much. Okay. Like when I was a drinker, all my friends would know all of these different liquors, all these beers, they could talk about them. I wasn't into it for that or like that. Cigars the same way.

I got people that can tell me everything about cigars, all these different brands. I, I, I'm not that kind of guy. The same for trees. I'm like, let's get some stuff in here. Let's see if it works. Let's see if it doesn't. I'm not too detail oriented. When I waited tables, it was at a place called bricks, wood fired

pizzas, right by the movie theater. And bricks with no K B R I X X. Pizzo's, right by the movie theater. Oh yeah. Bricks with no K. B-R-I-X-X. Yeah. That's how they spelled it. Okay. And they had a ton of beers on tap and I was supposed to learn about all of them, but I learned everything about one of them. Yeah. And I would just recommend that. And if they said they weren't interested, I would go, I don't know, I mean, probably some waters. Cause if you don't want Kentucky bourbon barrel, the greatest beer

of all time, I can't help. Are you even drinking? Yeah. Where else are you going to see Kentucky bourbon barrel on tap? Yeah. Get some. Yeah. And that had pretty good, pretty good yield on just recommending

one thing strongly, you know. Do you know how good that fry story is, that every time you talk about waiting tables, all I can think about is you eating the salt, eating those fries. That's all I can think about. I told it on Andrew Santino's podcast, and he clipped it up too.

So yeah, it's a fun story. It's all I can think about. Anytime you talk about working in a restaurant, that's what I think about. So a lot of people say, and I'm disgusting because you're not supposed, you're supposed to take food off the plate before it goes out, apparently.

That's stealing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. But circumstances were, I was a 17 year old kid right after school, hadn't eaten yet, I was hungry, I'm not getting paid, and I'm washing dishes. I don't even have access to the food before it goes out. Right. I'm only

handed a plate after we get it back. Yeah. So that's when I would take food. Would you ever take the approach? What I make out with this woman before? No, you did a joke about that years ago and then I gave up on it. But it's a good joke. That's a dusty sledge. You're listening. Dusty left. That's a good joke. That's a dusty sledge. If you're listening, dusty laugh. It's a good joke. And also a good philosophy or theory.

So you would only eat food off somebody's plate if you would make out with that woman or person. Yeah, then you branched out, right? And then if it was a guy, I would say, would the girl that I would make out with make out with this guy? That is a good joke. Yeah.

But yeah, I used to eat a lot of food off people's plates. So I get where you're coming from. And, but yeah, if you, if you eat it off the plate before you take it to the table, then you're stealing from those people. Exactly. You're a thief. Yeah. You didn't need to repent.

I agree with you. You were doing more of the native American ritual of eating the entire- Not letting anything go to waste. Exactly. I'm eating the entire potato. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. At least the salt. No, the salt was gone. Oh, yeah, yeah. The salt was gone. They did that. Okay. All right. All right. Gardening. So Dusty, I've always heard growing up in Tennessee that you don't plant until tax day, April 15th, because there'll be a late frost that'll get you every time. So I was wondering, when do you plant? Have you planted?

Will you plant? Well, that's what I do. Actually today I put out my pepper plants and my tomato plants and my cucumbers that I've been growing in my house. Oh, so you've been growing them in the house? Yeah. And you have like a heat lamp? I have a heat lamp.

Well, I have a lamp and then I have heat pads to keep the roots warm. And I've been growing these, I started them too early. I always get too excited and I start too early. Christmas morning. And I get ready because you think March sounds like spring to me yeah the word March sounds like spring like we're ready to go marching towards the Sun yeah and then April feels like we're wearing this new year that feels like yeah it feels like we're in the thick of

it but you're right but my mom said that her mom, my grandmother, used to call it an Easter snap and that you don't plan until after Easter because, yeah, you get that. Because tomatoes and cucumbers and peppers, they need heat. So you can't, I put a bunch of stuff out too early and they're dead.

You know what's interesting is some months can be names, but others can't. You were just saying the months that made me think you can be April, May, June. Can be names? Can be names but if you were named March that's crazy. September. If your name was September. I knew a girl whose last name was September. Well really? Well last name's different but if her name was September Williamson that's insane. What if your name was September. Well really, well last name's different but if her name was September Williamson that's insane. What if your name was January December? January I know a couple Januaries, January Jones from Mad Men, but that's rare right? I don't know if that's a real January but I guess Jan, but that's usually short for Janet, but February would be a crazy

But February would be a crazy. February sleigh. What about Feb? Maybe. Fabra, something like that. If your name was February, I would think that you would want to fix the spelling. That's what Vince did. You mean take that R out there? Yeah. It doesn't need to be there? Yeah. Fabra. Fabra. I've never thought about that, Aaron, but you make a good point. Once it hits June, I guess we're done, right? Oh, August. August. Your name could be August. Yeah. August for sure. I think Augustus.

Augustus, yeah, it's my nephew's name. Augustus? Yeah. After St. Augustus. Goes by Augie. I thought it was Augustus. Oh, Augustus Gloop from Willy Wonka. Cause I thought that was like, it was like, that was where August came from. It is.

Caesar Augustus or something like that. But Augustan is a- In July is Julius Caesar. Yeah. Oh, is it really? Yeah. So Julius is July. Yeah.

All right, maybe I'm wrong about all this. I feel like September is from the number seven. Right. And then October is the number eight. But it's the 10th month. Yeah. That's how we know our months are messed up. In December is deck DEC, which means 10. Yeah. What does November, November nine? I was thinking of no shave. Yeah. I guess. Right. But that's what it meant. All right. So you're planning.

I thought you were an expert. Sounds like you're not. Sounds like you're really messing up. No, I'm not. You know, I you know, my garden produces every year. So I'm you know, I'm not an expert. I'm not here to teach people how to garden, but I'm into it. I know about gardening. You're like Bob Ross.

You're trying to get people to discover the joy of gardening. Yeah, it's fun. I mean, it's like, we're so disconnected from our food. Right. If you get out there, you take your shoes off, walk around in the yard, you're grounding while you're doing it, you're getting your hands in the dirt.

I recommend trying it. Like people get so wrapped up in this and that, that it's like, you're not surviving off the garden. So I recommend don't use artificial fertilizers. Find a way, find alternative ways to get fertilizer and see what you can do. You know, create some good soil, collect your leaves, put them in a compost pile. You know, according to, um, Wikipedia, this don't waste things. According to this, uh, humans transition from hunting, hundred gatherers to growing crops, the gradual process of observation, trial and error, and domestication of wild plants. This was known as the agricultural revolution occurred in various regions of the world around 10,000 years ago.

Mm-hmm. Or you could translate that as to when the world was created, God taught us to garden. Right. When the world was created there were farms of corn just lined up in a row. And well we probably weren't doing this monoculture farming at the time. We were probably doing more of a you know more of a thing just so all things that you need for yourself probably non-gmo soy yeah cotton stuff like that. I think corn was only an American thing. Right. I don't think corn was anywhere else.

Maize, well there's maize. Yes. Well, hold on. What does green thumb mean? Do you have that in there? I do. Where did that come from? Would you say you have a green thumb?

Nah. Do you say that a lot when you talk to people? No, I think I do all right though. I am, you know. It's greenish. Because I grow most of my stuff from seeds. I, sometimes I'll go buy a plant, but most of the time I grow from seed. Do you ever get seeds from the stuff that you've grown?

Sometimes. And you've just, you've got a never ending cycle. Sometimes. Yeah. That's fun. As most of you know, I have two cats. What do you think about that? I didn't know you had two.

I got two cats and I got Glovesy and Mitzi. Abigail gave us one. She found it under a windmill or something. And that's Mitzi. Is Mitzi like Mittens, Glovesy and Mittens? Well, one was already named Glovesy. So we thought we might as well keep the theme going. Mitzi, if we get a third cat,

I don't know what we're gonna name it. Call it, I don't know. What's another thing that you wear on your hands rings rings a are you gonna get a third cat I don't think so but I gotta tell you this is the kind of joy the cat can bring in your life you know that's why you got to try Smalls Smalls cat food is a protein packed recipe made with preservative free ingredients you'd find in your fridge and it's delivered right to your door. That's why cats.com named Smalls their best overall cat food. To get 35% off plus an additional 50% off your first order head to

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What's that total? 85%. You're paying 15%. You're an idiot not to do it. It's a small price. It's a big discount. Yeah. What does green thumb mean? It means like your thumb is green. Okay. Okay. What is this? Uh, jerk day at the Nate Lane

studio? Come on, man. Jerk store call. Um, I mean, it is really just like in England, they say green fingers. it just means you work in the garden so your hands get green. But what's the origin of that? Well I think if you are digging around out there messing around with stuff you can't you know things but I think it's just your ability to be able to you got the you got the ability to grow you're got a special hand in it. I know the implication of it I'm wondering where it comes from. Well that's what I'm saying you got a special hand in it you can implication of it. I'm wondering where it comes from. That's what I'm saying. You got a special hand in it. You can really get it done. I looked and like two thumbs. Two thumbs Barghetti. Yeah. I don't think there is any like great revolution, like some guy did something and

said something. It's just kind of just that. Now I looked up green rooms. Oh, I'd like to hear about that. There's a few theories on why we call them green rooms, but. Talking about the green room, like at a comedy club. Yeah, at a comedy club. Ooh. Never thought about this. The term dates back to the medieval times in theaters of London.

One theory is that actors used to practice their scripts in plant-filled rooms because the moisture was supposed to benefit an actor's voice. Whoa. We should have more plants though. There are not enough plants in places. We need more and more plants. I got a lot of plants in my house.

I'm all about a plant. What are you going to do for Earth Day? Probably nothing. I try to, you know, I'm more of a, you know, I don't, I'm not, I don't get into Earth. Every day's Earth Day for you. I don't get into Earth worship. Yeah.

I get it. I'm a God worship guy. And then, uh, he has provided me with this earth to be on. And I like to try to take care of it, try to take care of the animals. I think that's what all the earth day is about. I don't think it's about worship. What about Arbor Day? Flag Day is not about worship.

Arbor Day? I don't like the worship trees. You know what I mean? Yeah, you shouldn't. I mean, the Bible warns against it, but, uh, the, um. But planting trees, that's a good thing. Planting trees are good. I like the worship trees. You know what I mean? Yeah, you shouldn't. I mean, the Bible warns against it. But the planting trees, that's a good thing. Planting trees are good. I like to do it.

I plant a lot of trees. Yeah. Oh, you do. You plant a lot. Yeah. I'm in a decent amount. Yeah. People know it.

You just show up in their yard. No, I mean, I got, you know, I got land. Oh yeah. When I go plant trees. I got about 40 trees that I planted in McMinnville, maybe 50. Wow. Fruit trees? Fruit trees, a couple of oak trees, some- Oak trees. Yeah, some pecan trees, walnut trees. Huh. Yeah, oak trees. That'll take a long time to- Yeah. Like a hundred years.

So that's why we call it a green room now, is because there used to be- That's one theory. Just full of greenery that would do what? Increase the moisture? Yeah, I think the oxygen or whatever. Okay, change the humidity? Yeah. Now, it should just be called like Red Bull Cura Groom now. Yeah. I don't know if I've seen a plant in a green room ever. All right, Desi, I want you to help us with this. Aaron's starting the garden. I agree with you though, Aaron. Yeah. A lot of speed being done in there. Aaron wants to start... have you ever grown a garden? I've never planted anything. I've never grown anything to completion. Perfect. So he wants to start a garden in his backyard. What should he grow? Well, I think you should grow something that you want to eat. Pizza?

Yeah. I mean, you have a point. Yeah. But yeah, I mean, ideally, if you want to do a, like grow something that you want to eat, because that will be exciting for you. Can I grow anything here? Or is there stuff that you can't grow here in Tennessee? Uh, yeah.

I mean, there's plenty of like, like fruit tree, like things that you can't like an orange tree. I can't grow things that you can't grow in a season, uh, that won't survive the winter. Now I have an avocado tree growing. Uh, I don't know. I have it growing inside all winter and the moment it starts getting hot, I'm going to put it outside and then I'm going to try to bring it back in next

winter, depending on how big it is. Okay. And I'm going to see how long I can get this going. I had fig trees that I got from Alabama. I cut them and then rooted them and then made, these were fig trees that my grandfather planted in, he died in 1966. So he, Well I thought he died in 1900. He's born in 1900.

Oh, my bad. So he planted these trees before 1966 and they're still growing and it still proves tons of figs. So I got some cuttings, brought them up here, planted them and they grew pretty big last year, but the winter was really rough on them. Winter took them out. So now they're like regrowing from the base. So I don't know that this is the great,

this is great fig weather up here, but there might be something I can do to protect them. But you know, you probably can't grow oranges, you probably can't grow mangoes, but most things you can grow. Most like a season like a basil and all that kind of I don't even know what you call herbs. Yeah, I grow basil every year time last through the winter. Oregano last through the winter. Peppermint. Mm hmm.

But you know, peppermint. Yeah, I would grow things that you wanna eat though. Why does a tree, why doesn't a plant just not last forever? Why does it die? Well, I think some of it is that they're not native here, so they can't handle the winters. But any, I mean, any plant anywhere, why do they die? Well, I don't know, but I mean, I think, you know,

there are tons of, you know, perennial plants that come back every year. And I think it has a lot to do with being able to survive the winter. So if you had a plant in your house and you resold it and watered it properly, you're asking why, what would eventually kill it? Could you in theory, just keep a plant alive forever? We know we know there are trees that are you know a thousand years old or whatever very old. My mom just brought me an African violet that she took from a one that my grandmother had. My grandmother died you know 17 years ago and so she's keeping these going so I have it at my house. You have

that Afghan? I have an Afghan too yeah. From your grandma? Yeah. Mm-hmm. From both my grandmother. Alright so Aaron's planting a garden. Oh by the way he said the most common thing planted is tomatoes. Yeah. That makes sense. I believe it. And home-grown tomatoes are delicious. There's a great Guy Clark song about it. Very good called homegrown tomatoes. And they are so good. My kids will pick tomatoes off the vine and eat them. Yeah, they're delicious certified fresh. They are so like rotten to me good. Yeah. Oh, here's what here's what you need. Aaron. Yeah, that's the

tell me this trip. You need a sunny spot. Most vegetables need six to eight hours direct sunlight daily. Do you have that? A couple spots in the backyard, I think. So you have to keep an eye on where the sun's shining. That's where you put the lasagna garden. Yeah.

I mean, that's my backyard is not really great for it. I have, you know. It's got a lot of shade. Yeah. Well, that's why you shouldn't have so many trees. Yeah. Well have, you know, a shade. Yeah. Well, that's why you shouldn't have so many trees. Yeah. Well, I don't have a lot of trees. I'm down. I do have some fruit trees that I planted though, that if I

move, I'm digging them up. Okay. You gotta have a, you gotta have a spot. I went to a friend's house, a friend of ours just bought a house and I went to his house and he had a huge backyard. Yeah. Did you like it? And I was like, oh man. house, a friend of ours just bought a house and I went to his house and he had a huge backyard. Yeah, did you like it? And I was like, oh man.

I was like, I gotta get a bigger backyard. You're talking about Connor? Yeah. Yeah. He's got a lot of land out there. You gotta come to my house. And I'm told that, actually my wife told me, she said, if you are jealous of Connor's backyard, you should not go to Brian's house.

Oh, you got a big yard, Brian? I got a big backyard, yeah. How big are we talking? Do you mow it to Brian's house. Oh, you got a big yard? I got a big backyard, yeah. How big are we talking? Do you do you? Do you mow it? No, OK, that's all I need to know. Even if I had a small yard, I would be embarrassed to ask somebody to mow my lawn.

That's how small it is. You know, I love mowing. I like it too. It's a good. I got a zero turn and I got, you know, I got nine acres in McMinnville and I'll go out there and a lot of it's wood. So it's not all nine acres, but I probably mow four to five acres with a zero turn lawnmower.

I love it. When I went to Boston a few months ago and we get to the tour of Fenway park. And I was just watching the guy whose job it is to mow the grass at Fenway. I don't know if I've ever been more jealous of a man's job. Yeah, so great. Just to mow grass in a beautiful place. Yes. Now that I would love.

I mean, what a life, dude. I don't want to be maneuvering around rocks and trees and things. Nah, just straight up. Yeah. Just center field to second base. Yeah. And then you turn around and trees and things. Nah, just straight up. Yeah. Just center field to second base. Yeah. And then you turn around and you go back. But a zero turn, it's pretty fun to maneuver around things.

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, that's true. I'm guessing he mows other places as well. Yeah, I bet so. But it was, I sat there and watched him for a while. I bet. Pretty jealous. All right.

And here's another thing. We got a good life too. I got a lot of plants that have come back. So I've had, I've moved around stuff in my backyard so much that this year I didn't really move a lot of the plants. So this year, a lot of them are getting that second year growth and it's pretty awesome

what's happening in my backyard right now. I'm very excited about it. You got the bats coming in too? Not yet. I got a bad house. So your farm McMinnville, would you ever like really grow crops? I don't know. I want to make a food forest, which is like, you know, basically a forest that everything's edible. Right. That's what I want to do. For who? Do they have those? Do those occur in the wild? I don't know. Australia, I watch a guy in Australia that does it, the Weedy Garden guy.

And then there's a guy named James Pregioni that does one. He has a YouTube and he does one in New Jersey. And New Jersey weirdly is the same grow number. You know, it's like you have grow areas. New Jersey is the garden state. Yes. And it's like, they're like a 7A and we're a 7A or 7B, one of the two, but you know,

the lower the number is, the hotter it is and the more you can grow. Like we're, I always describe Nashville as the North of the South, you know. Yeah. You know what I mean? A little too cold for me here. I could do warmer.

Yeah. We're moving to McMinnville. Still, it's pretty much the same weather. Yeah. Our next sponsor, you know we love, our old friends, Delete Me. Delete Me has been with us for a good chunk of this podcast. They've been through some highs and lows and they've stuck through it, man. You know, Delete Me has been hooking me up. Well, they make it easy, quick and safe to remove your personal data online at a time when surveillance and data breaches are common enough to make everyone vulnerable.

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That's joindeleteeme.com slash Nate enter code Nate at checkout. That's joindeleteme.com slash Nate code, Nate. All right, here's some common gardening mistakes here. And not to, I've kind of skipped ahead here. Okay. Not watering enough. Sometimes when you guys don't believe in a topic, you really, you really will zip through it. Well,

I'm zipping through it because You'll go, people are listening to this. You kept jumping in. I want to hear some common gardening mistakes. Do top five gardening mistakes in Nashville. All right. Number one, setting too lofty of a gardening goal. Bigger isn't always better.

At least if you're a beginner, that's true. I probably would do that. I probably plant so much tobacco, all of it. But why do they think that's a mistake? Uh, because you get out of hand. You can do like you and you're half your stuff dies because you, you get too gung ho. Yeah, but half lives. But this is if you're starting out, you've got a gardener,

of course, maybe figure out the ins and outs of growth. There's no better way to figure the- Photosynthesis. There's no better way to figure out the ins and outs of growth. There's no better way to figure the- Photosynthesis. There's no better way to figure out the ins and outs, in my opinion, than to go all out. Experience. Yeah. Okay.

I like this. This is fun. Disagree with all of them. So yeah, so this is right. All right. Mistake number two, not interplanning. Let all your buds play together. Interplanning or intercropping is a gardening practice

that encourages pairing companion plants, as well as building taller and shorter plants. Nah, I said, let them fight it out, dude. It's saying make sure that the plants that you plant play well with each other and compliment each other. You know, you don't want a, uh, you wouldn't want to plant corn next to a Venus fly trap, for instance. I don't know. I would love that. I still don't even understand that, but I, I, I think. Would you plant a Venus fly trap, for instance. I don't know. I would love that.

I still don't even understand that. But I, I, I, did you plan a Venus fly trap in the yard? I had a Venus fly trap somebody gave me. Did you really? I killed it like right away. They're very hard to keep alive. Oh, okay.

Died accidentally. Yeah. You said I killed it. No, I think I, I got a fight, but the, does it really catch? I never got to that place. I mean, I know that I've seen videos, but like, I was wondering if you ever got to that.

But the, I never got to that place. That'd be incredible. But the, uh, I would say this with that one, just make sure that you're not planning something, uh, taller than something else to block the sun. You don't want, you want your, you know, to make sure everything's getting out. All right. the sun. You don't want, you want your, you know, to make sure everything's getting adequate sun. All right. Number, so far we've disagreed the first two. Mistake number three. That's amazing. Yeah. Over. If you're listening, I'm watching a video of a Venus fly trap. Eat a fly. That's an impression of a Venus fly trap. I would do much better. Well,

Flytrap. I would do much better. Well, get him. You also did this like Obama doesn't point with his finger like this either. It's the thumb up. The Obama I know. Oh, let me be clear. Oh, of course. That's Bill Clinton. You're taught that in skull and bones. They teach you how to hold your hand like that. I thought that was George Bush and John Kerry. Well, they're all in there. I guess you're right. Mistake number three, overcrowding plants. Although mixing plants together is A-OK, you still have to be mindful of spacing. People want the instant garden full of colorful,

but that's a big mistake. Plants need room to grow and spread naturally. I always disagree with that. I say just do whatever you wanna do. You're not gonna live off this garden. Yeah. Do whatever you want to do. Load it up.

Yeah. I like things to be packed. I have my tomato plants. I always plant too many tomato plants. They get so big. There's tomatoes everywhere and I love it. Yeah. Less is only more if you know what more is, you know?

Yes. That's beautiful. Mistake number four. Oh, you know what. Yeah. Less is only more if you know what more is, you know? Yes. That's beautiful. Uh, mistake number four. Oh, you know what? Yeah. I don't mean to just interrupt right now. Please do. In the middle of this. We're really rolling. But I forgot to say, I did a show with Michael J. Fox. I met Michael J. Fox. Wow. You looked like Chris Stapleton for a little bit when you did a thing and I also met Chris Stapleton for a little bit when you did a thing. And I also met Chris Stapleton. It's a perfect time to bring it up.

And I just wanted to just say that I met Michael J Fox. How was he? He was really great. Yeah. He was very nice. We got to talk for a bit. I actually did. Did you say Parkinson's is fake?

No, I mean, you listen. Did you go into it thinking I'm going to scope it out? I'm going to go to the bathroom and see if he's really doing it. I don't know. I mean, I had, I got a chance to really talk to him and it's very clear that he has trouble talking and, um, and I, uh, really enjoyed talking to him. Now we had a lot of fun. He asked me was I a musician? I don't even know if he knew why I was there at first.

And, uh, I said, no. And he said, I can't play anything either. He asked me, was I a musician? I don't even know if he knew why I was there at first. And, uh, I said, no. And he said, I can't play anything either. And I said, so you were just acting and back to the future. And he got a pretty good laugh. Oh, that's good. Yeah. It's a crazy cast right here.

You, Chris Stapled and Michael J Fox, Little Big Town. Yeah. Also Cheryl Crowe was there. Just hanging out. Yeah. Yeah. Why not? And Kelsey Ballerini. How about that? Yeah. Did you tell Crow was there. Just hanging out. Yeah. Yeah. Why not? And Kelsey Ballerini. How about that?

Yeah. Did you tell her your Crow joke? No, actually I didn't even recognize Sheryl Crow. That's cool. But yeah, anyway. So, I just want to say that. I just forgot that. You have a similar, you have a Chris Stapleton beard.

Well, I appreciate that, but I'd say his is, he's rocking. It's longer, but that's it. Okay. You and Chris together, you look so happy there. Me? Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, I enjoy my life and I knew my hair was better than Chris Stapleton.

Showing it off. Yeah. Yeah. He hated it. He must've hated it. Oh yeah. Mistake number four, planting too much variety. Tempting as it may be to plant everything from acorns to zucchini, focus on growing

vegetables, herbs, and flowers that bring joy to your plate. Well, that's ridiculous. No one plants acorns. I mean, well you just planted a Venus flytrap. No, no. Somebody gave me one and it was in a pod in my house. Okay. But yeah, I mean, that's an oak tree, I guess, is what we're talking about with an acorn. And it's like, you're not going to plant an oak tree in your garden. But didn't you just say plant what you're going to eat? That's all they're saying. They're saying plant. Plant what you said. Plant what tickles your fancy. But if your fancy is tickled by a lot of variety, then grow it.

Okay. You told me to disagree with all this. I know, I like it. I'm trying. I think you're gonna agree with this next one, Dustin. We'll see. You gotta get on the garden schedule. Now that you have this food, you have to eat them.

Don't leave ready to harvest items on the vine. Just like leaving a popsicle on the lawn and then being surprised it's covered with ants. The last part was for us to understand. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, I guess, I mean, I say go out there every day. Yeah. And if there's something ready, pick it and eat it.

I mean, that's, I don't know. Don't overthink this. I don't know, but because cucumbers, what will happen with those, if you don't pick them, they, too much energy will go into one cucumber and it gets really big. And then you can't eat the cucumber. It gets overripe and then it kills your vine.

And you have to pickle it. Or do you have to throw it out? I basically have to throw it out. Are cucumbers in the ground like potatoes? No, no, they're like a vine. Okay. I thought you'd scoop them up. They're in the mellow.

Now they're in the melon family. Do pineapples grow on trees? I don't know what pineapples grow on, but everybody made fun of Aaron about saying pineapple tree. And I, I mean, I- I think I meant coconut tree. Yeah. You think you just fell out of a coconut tree?

Yeah, I don't know how pineapples grow because that's another thing we can't grow around here. Yeah, that's not a native Tennessee plant. I'm only interested in native Tennessee plant. Which was pawpaws and white cherries. Chickasaw plums. Yeah. Number six, mistake six, you've already said this, Dusty. Misunderstanding plant growth. You got to know how high your plants are going to grow. Like a tomato can grow up to eight feet and then it can block and shade other plants around you. So you got to know how high they're going to grow

for adequate sunlight. Yeah, I'll say it's around here. It's unlikely that your tomato is going to reach eight feet, but- Why around here? I don't know. I'd never had a tomato get eight feet. Oh, maybe that's you.

Maybe it is. James Pergione, he'll do a thing where he builds a big stand and he has strings going up and he kind of ties the tomatoes to the string and they go they get really oh that's cool because tomatoes are essentially a vine too yeah but all right improper watering says don't water like a wimp you got to really get in there and really drown them get after it can you drown a plant though? You can. Okay. You

don't want them to sit in water. They'll get root rot. Yeah. What about running? Do you want them in running water or do you want still water? I think still water. Okay. Have you ever... I'm trying to ask the dumbest questions. Like when you put them in a river and that way there's a little bit of current going. Ever wondered why some arenas are called gardens? I haven't, but now I'd like to know the answer. Madison Square Garden. Yeah. The Boston TD Garden. There you go. The Nashville Garden. Due to the historical association with the word garden, meaning an open space or large public area for entertainment.

The original Madison Square Garden, for example, opened in 1879 with no roof, making it a truly open space. Wow. How about that? Now they're just called gardens. I've never thought about that. I had neither. Why they're called gardens?

Uh, it's educational podcast. Yeah. Do you guys know the nursery rhyme? Mary, Mary, quite contrary. Mary, Mary, quite contrary. What makes your garden grow? Or how does your garden grow? Oh yeah. Silver bells and cockle shells and pretty maids all in a row. You know what that means? No. Probably different plants. No one knows for sure what it means. I think it could have been Mother Mary, talking about spread of

Christianity. Okay. How will it grow? Could Mother Mary talking about spread of Christianity. Okay. How will it grow? Could have been Mary, Queen of England. Yeah. Who didn't have any children. Yeah. But no one knows for sure. And Jack and Jill went up the hill.

That was about the spread of Islam. There's, I don't know what I'm talking about. One of the great scenes in the movie, Rudy Rudy where Rudy's hammered at the bar. And he's trying to hit, trying to hit on a girl and her name is Mary. And he goes, Mary, Mary, quite contrary. What makes your garden grow? And it's just, it's not a good pickup line. I thought it was good.

Well, it doesn't know it doesn't work at all. It doesn't work. That's one of those things that they got wrong in the movie though. I think it did work in real life. Is that the girl who let him paint the helmets? Yeah, it's a girl. And then she found out that he wasn't actually a Notre Dame student.

It's a great scene though, late in the movie during practice when he runs over. You remember me? Yeah. Yeah, it's a great scene. Yeah, there's an arc to it, but. Yeah. I was thinking of some other famous gardens.

You referenced the Garden of Eden. I don't think I did, but. Well, you said. You did implicitly. Yeah. Just by, just your existence. Well, right, because in the Bible, right, there's the Garden of Eden that they're in,

and then, but I think that's just fruit. It's just fruit trees. And then they get kicked out of the garden and they have to till the land. Right. And that's when they have to get into vegetables. That's right. I believe in the beginning we only ate fruit and then once we had to work for it, we started to till. And then after the flood we ate meat. I think there was no meat eating until after the flood. Yeah.

Just fruit at first. Sugar is off the charts. Just an amazing, well, fruit sugar is- Diabetes. If you eat sugar- Eve is getting fat. If you eat fruit- Put some clothes on. The way that it's- That's why they started wearing clothes. Adam's like, think about it, this apple. Sorry, Dusty. What? If you eat fruit the way that, you know, it's intended, like the actual structure, not putting it in a smoothie, not juicing it, then you get the fiber

along with it at the same time. And your body, as you take bites, your teeth and your different receptors in your mouth, recognize what you're eating and get yourself ready for it. It doesn't affect you in the same way sugar wise. Okay, but I think a lot of it, it would start to be a problem. If you only ate fruit, I think that it would just filter right through. It's just hard to go on a fruit diet.

Yeah. But I think it would just go right through you, just filter. It's like, I think this is what they say happens. You eat meat and then it sets on your stomach for a little bit, a little longer to digest meat. Oh. You eat meat and then it sits on your stomach for a little bit, a little longer to digest meat. So then you eat fruit on top of the meat and then the fruit needs to break down faster. So it sits in there and it putrefies in your stomach, creating a real gassy ferment situation. I don't know if that's true, but I think that. Isn't the appendix meant to break down meat?

I don't think the appendix does that. Or what was the role of the appendix? to break down meat? Or what was the role of the appendix? I think that's the gallbladder. I don't know. Well then if we started out only eating fruit, why do we have anything in our body that processes meat? You know what I mean? Well, I think it just, you know, the gallbladder creates bile that helps to break that.

I think it helps to break all things down. And these are, you know, a lot of this is just theories on mine. Oh yeah. Well, I'm just talking through them with you. There's been a lot of speculation on where the garden of Eden actually was. Uh, there was four tributaries, Bible said. So some think it could have been Mesopotamia, modern day Czech Republic. Missouri?

Yeah. Yeah. Did you know that or do you? No, I know that's where some people think it is. Well, yeah. Jackson County, Missouri. Yeah, Independence, Missouri I think is where Joseph Smith thought the gardening was

and then when they were cast out of the garden, they went to another part of Missouri. There was a, some people say that the Gofer Wood. I'm wise guys, May 1617, so I agree with this. Go ahead. Some people said Gofer Wood that the Ark was built out of is only found in Florida. Gofer Wood? I've never heard of that. TikTok said that. I don't remember that. Some people. Pope Francis. They put a, God put an angel when they got cast out of the garden of Eden to guard with a fiery sword to guard. Yeah.

Okay. You think that angel was like, he's up in heaven. God's like, hey, can you give me a picture? Go down there and guard. Yeah, no problem. How long? Forever. Forever.

Forever. I. Forever. I don't think the angels have any, I mean, they just do what God tells them to do. Well, yeah. Yeah. But they have free will. That's what Lucifer is, is a fallen angel that rejected God. Yeah, but free will to an extent. You're like, yeah, you can choose to do that if you want to, but we're going to, it's going to be hard for you. We're going to make life hard for you. Dusty, do you think, uh, gardens can res or plants can respond to sound? Do you think that helps them?

Yeah, I think that, uh, birds chirping help, uh, flowers to open in the morning. They have a frequency. I read that somewhere someone had found class, they would play their plants, classical music. And they created larger, they made larger fruit I remember a buddy of mine growing up science fair grew multiple plants and played different genres of music to each plant one of them he played classical music one of them would be Limp Bizkit one of them would be Lil Wayne one of of them would be Garth Brooks. And I wish I

remembered the results. I would say Classical. I think Classical. I was waiting. I think Classical grew the most. And then the other ones, I mean, it was like a negligible difference for the amount of time that this kid was able to grow something. But, but it did play a role in it. Yeah, I think so. I think there is the you know, nature works altogether. Yeah. Studies have shown vibration like music or sweet sounds of your voice can affect plant growth. Plus on Mythbusters, which I know you don't believe in, but in this case, they showed that it did help. Wow.

Yeah, I think those guys did some good things, but I think they're just they're kind of just garbage guys. You know, it's interesting. Those guys like hate each other. Those two guys and the show up and they do the show and it's all hunky dory. Yeah. I mean, cameras turn off. It's kind of like us.

It's tough to like a guy when you know that they're a liar and they each know that they're liars. And you're like, ah, this guy lies a lot, but they both know it. And that, yeah, I mean, that's how I feel about you guys. So they hated each other even on the show. No, they were fine on the show. Well, I guess I meant this didn't come later. Like, no, this was while they were working. They were literally just like two coworkers, no particular

friendship at all. They just showed up and did a job together. And one of the guys wore like a French hat. Remember that? A little paperboy hat. Right? I thought it was like a little French painter hat. Well, I think we're talking about this. Oh, it is more like a French painter. Yeah, you can't. And then the Indiana Jones hat. Look at these guys. They look like buds though. Isn't that a little disappointing? It is. Because

you watch, at least I watch a sports team, and I want to think they're all friends. I wouldn't be friends with either of these guys. Actually, the Indiana Jones hat I like more than the other one. these guys. Actually the Indiana Jones hat I like more than the other one. That's tough. Both of them stink hat wise. Just because you know what they're about, you wouldn't be friends with them. Are you talking about their looks? No, no, no. He's not talking about their looks. Yeah, their looks. I judge people on their looks all the time. Come on. If you're not wearing a sweatshirt, then Dusty doesn't want to hang out with you. We dress very different, but we're all friends. No, I am.

Yeah, no, I'm sure they're all nice guys. We talked a couple of weeks ago about the farmer's almanac and they put out gardening things. I didn't realize this. There's two different types. There's the farmer's almanac and the old farmer's almanac. Farmer's almanac is published in Lewiston, Maine. The Old Farmer's Almanac is published in New Hampshire, Dublin, New Hampshire. I think the Old

Farmer's is, I always just call it Farmer's Almanac, but it seemed like the Old Farmer's is the one that's more well known. You know, somebody posted in the Nate Land Facebook group the plastics thing that I was talking about. What about it? What was it? It's the sheet that breaks down the plastics and tell you what's good, what's okay to eat. Okay. And I meant to take a look at it, but I mean I did look at it, but it got very little traction. People were not into it in the group. So you know they do weather predictions. You guys aren't even into it now, but anyway. They do weather predictions. Yeah. And the the guy who originally published the Old Farmers' Almanac, he studied solar activity,

astronomy cycles, and weather patterns and uses research to develop a secret forecasting formula which is still in use today and they won't reveal exactly. It's like KFC. They won't reveal the recipe the farmers almanac yeah yeah wow and it's yielded pretty good results I read that no it didn't it's not that accurate oh then our people really claim are in a define this what dusty is this I only bought the farmers almanac for that page that told me the plastic. Oh. Otherwise I could care less. I bought it for the aphorisms. All right, Dusty. If we, bottom line, I want to start planning something.

What should I start with? A food, is that what you mean? Anything in the garden. What's something easy that I could win with two? That's what you're asking though. He wants to impress, he wants to be able, when people come over, he goes, I got a garden. Yeah, we're going to show it to him and they go. Oh, I'm growing some you want to grow from seed. I guess

tomatoes tomatoes. That's that's the easy when you say grow from seed. Does that mean the alternative is you get a plant that's already yeah, you go to yeah, you go to the loz or Home Depot or a local nursery. And then you buy a little plant and plant it and then it grows. Pop it in. And you take a hoe and just dig a hole. Or just your hands, depending on what it is.

You know, you're not going to want to. You're not going to put it right in the ground around grass and stuff. Yeah. You know, you're going to want an area. So you may. It's all grass. Yeah. You may need want an area. So you may need- What's all grass? Yeah, you may need some kind of raised bed garden situation or a pot. For my tomato plants.

Yeah, and try to get yourself some soil that's not full of, don't buy the miracle grow stuff. What should I buy? Home Depot has some pretty good organic fertilizer. Monsanto has some good stuff, I think. Soil. Okay. And do tomato plants, don't they have stick, like a stick you're supposed to? Yeah, you can. So they can grow around it? I would say get a little tomato cage. Tomato cage. Tomato cage. Yeah, it just goes right over, sticks down in the soil, the tomato grows up.

Makes it grow up and out. Well, it'll grow up and then as it grows out it could kind of rest on the oh I've seen a metal tomato cage yeah that's cool so if I planted tomatoes today how long before I start seeing I think you'd get tomatoes in a month that quickly maybe yeah I think so red edible tomatoes I think so I could be wrong about that but uh- if you bought a plant, if you start growing from seed, it's going to take longer. Remember that little bonsai tree I had that I let die, and I brought it into the podcast? Yeah.

And I gave it to you to? I really tried for a while. But after a while, I realized, this is completely dead. Mr. Miyagi is full of it. Yeah. Well, even Mr. Miyagi wouldn't be able to. Save that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right.

Well, what does this say? Well, this was 60 to 80 days seed to seed to ready to harvest. Yeah. So 60 days. So yeah, I'd say if you get it already grown, I'd say a month you'll have to man. But what's something fun like have friends over I'm growing. It's fine just because it looks fun or like a Venus fly trap sounds fun to me. But so you don't want to get him to say marijuana. That's what it feels like. You don't want edible. What would be like something I could break out at a party?

Maybe sell a little bit on the side and make some money. I've never successfully grown weed. I have grown a little bit of it in the pad, but never successfully. You got arrested or? No, no, I just, they just die. You just, you know, also changed. You changed as a person. Yeah, my mom caught it, you know. Okay, okay. And then, you know, I never wanted to go to jail. And, but the, yeah, I mean, I like thyme, basil. I don't even know what thyme looks like. I never had successfully grown thyme from seed, but I have had some thyme.

I like thyme, oregano, basil. What about lettuce? Rosemary. Lettuce is fun too. But this is why I like those herbs, especially if you're growing tomatoes. You can make yourself a delicious tomato soup with all of those herbs and agro garlic every year.

I have a bunch of garlic growing. You know, garlic, that's, that's where it's at. You make yourself a tomato soup and how, yeah, I was going to say, how good does it feel to eat or partake of your food? You've grown yourself? It feels the best and you're getting maximum nutrients because the moment something's picked from the tree, it's starting to lose nutrients. So if you pick it and go eat it right away, it's just maximum. And what does Hannah think about it?

Well, she loves eating the stuff. Hannah could care less about gardening, but she loves to eat the stuff. Yeah. The fruits of your labor. Yeah. Literal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's, it's great. I mean, you want something fun to grow, you know, a cow, you know, a sheep. I mean, those are fun to grow, but, uh, you know, plants. Uh, well, that's what I meant. Yeah. Plants. But yeah, I don't know that there's anything like cool. I think tomatoes maybe. I have an avocado tree growing at my house that nobody's that impressed by. And I think that's very fun.

Yeah. I love an avocado. I have an apple tree growing from a seed right now. I have two apricot trees growing from seed. I have, I have muscadines. I took, you know, muscadines, you're just eating them. I took the seeds out of those, planted them. I got a vine growing now. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Yeah, just throw your food waste in Dusty's backyard. Something will happen. Well, that's how the avocado tree started. I just threw a seed out and I was like pulling weeds one day and I

pulled this up and I could it was still in the avocado shell. Wow. So I took it and put it in a pot. Oh, I bet you love that. Yeah. Yeah. You think the war would be a better place if we just all grew gardens? Yeah, I think everybody would be healthier and we would all have a, you know, just a better understanding of where our food comes from. Of course, it's hard for people because not everybody has land. Not everybody has the time. And that's by design. We're designed. We're just in the machine. It's just like get to work and pick up a pizza on the way home

and put it in the microwave in the morning. It's all in the morning. No, eat it cold. Yeah. It's way better. But your dad sold insurance, right? Yes. And he farmed.

Yes. On the side. Do you see yourself maybe sometime farming yeah full time uh i don't know you'll be out of comedy soon i feel yeah i mean preaching in a couple years yeah i mean that'd be a couple more specials i think cows yeah i mean i need to make some money too so that i can when you taped this last special did it feel like this might be the last one no i felt good i mean like i already i feel like this might be the last one? No, I felt good. I mean, like I already, I feel like I already have like a new hour. I feel very good.

That's so crazy. That is crazy. It's, you know, it's a lot of people in the audience feel like it might be the last one. I mean, I don't know. I feel like I was just doing this set this weekend and I'm like, I'm still doing some stuff from the special, but I'm also was doing an hour 10 all weekend. Yeah. And I'm probably doing 15 from the special.

That's awesome. You're ready to tape another one. I mean, I'm feeling good. I mean, I like, I like doing comedy and, uh, but I think that, yeah, I mean, you gotta, you gotta do other things. Yeah. If somebody came to you, put a gun to your head and said, you have to get rid of your garden or a random person on earth dies.

What would you do? Oh, a random person on earth dies. You'd rather that happen. Yeah. Wow. Who's the random person? Well, that's the whole point about it being random. You don't know, dude.

Could be, could be somebody you'll know and love. A random person's going to die anyway. It's why they're random I mean, I guess that's fair. Yeah. Yeah, what's what's one more? Yeah Anyway, all right This week are totally changing subjects. Yeah This weekend is the NFL draft, which I love. Oh, Titan's other number one pick. Looks like we're taking Cam Ward.

Yep. How do you feel about that? I mean, look, I'm really excited about it. I hope he's the next great quarterback. If that's what we indeed do. Yeah. But I think I've asked you guys this before. I'm so bored with the draft. I used to get so excited by it. Never. We've talked about gardening for an hour, Dusty. Come on. No, I'm just saying I used to love the draft. It never pans out. You're always like, oh man, I can't wait for next season. These are dynamic things. This is going to be exciting. Right. Rarely is.

Pans out sometimes. Yeah. But these, all these young men have no idea what city they're about to live in yeah, and they have Very little say in the matter. Yeah If you guys got drafted by comedy clubs, I've asked this question before but I like where would you? Want to get drafted to or where would you not want to get you probably? But where would you like to get drafted to? Because you know those guys that don't want to go to some of these cities. Well, it just depends on where I'm at in comedy.

Right now. I would get drafted to... Are we doing it for the comedy scene or for the world around us? Everything. I think it's all... Like you could get drafted to Toronto and then you'll be up there with Hannah's family. I would wanna get drafted to somewhere in Florida, like Jacksonville or Tampa.

The Jacksonville Comedy Zone? Well, I- Yeah, it doesn't have to be a NFL city. Well, I could just, no, I just mean like, I could, you know, do the kinda, I could grow a lot of stuff. And do comedy still. I mean, I think those are both, you know, Tampa especially kind of, I could grow a lot of stuff and, uh, and do comedy still. I mean, I think those are both, uh, you know, Tampa especially is a big city.

Yeah. Draft big city and, uh, Tampa emperor, right. And it's two clubs. Funny boom now. Oh, funny. But yeah, I mean, it's like Florida has a ton of clubs. I mean, like, uh, just comedy club. Uh, yeah, I would say, uh, Denver, uh, comedy works.

I met more of the first, the whole experience for the whole experience, I would say Denver Comedy Works. I meant more the first, the whole experience. But for the whole experience, I would wanna go to Florida. Yeah. Yeah. What about you? I'm pretty happy with here. I say you can't say here just because we're here. Okay, then I'll do Denver for sure.

I love the outdoors, I love the area. Or you know what I would do? Phoenix. Phoenix. Arizona would be good. Send me to Phoenix. I like that. Why Phoenix? It's my favorite part of the country. Hiking out there, it's unbelievable. It's a navigable city. It's so hot. Yeah, I don't mind it. I'm hot

everywhere. I'm hot. Send me to Detroit, I'm hot. I might as well have a good reason to be. What about Dallas? Nah, I don't like Dallas. Oh, I kind of would like, you know, I like a coastal. I'd like to have a city like... Boston? On the coast, but like down south, you know. Charleston. Like Los Angeles.

Oh yeah, Charleston does have a club, so there's no way to get drafted there. Charleston has a club. Oh, it does, doesn't it? The Wits End. Yeah. Yeah, I'm changing my answer. there. Charleston has a club. Oh, it does, doesn't it? The wits end. Yeah. Yeah, I'm changing my answer. Okay. Charleston's the new answer.

Yeah. All right. All right. That's good. What about you, Brian? I think last time- Mayberry. Would you say Mayberry?

I would. I would like to live in Mayberry. I watch Andy Griffith a lot these days. Yeah. It's a good choice. Only the black and white. It gets bad when it's in color. I've not gotten there yet. I bought all the DVDs.

Yeah. I think last time I said Louisville. You did say Louisville. Because they had three comedy clubs at the time. I was like, that's underrated city for comedy. I disagree. I had a great time when I did Louisville, but yeah, I don't think it's an underrated city for comedy. Well, I had a great time when I did Louisville, but yeah, I don't think it's an

underrated city for government. Well, I just meant stage time wise, it could potentially be. I'll say, yeah, Denver's pretty good. Yeah, Denver's awesome. We're all saying that, but it's awesome. There's a lot of clubs around there. There's two in the city. And then Fort Collins has one. Comedy Fort. Yeah, there's, and then Fort Collins has one, uh, comedy fort. Yeah, there's a, and then there's other things just around, you know, Colorado Springs, I've been all over cities there. And then also, uh, you know, I think Denver's very expensive and a lot of people that are, that have lived in Denver for a long time are saying it's like

ruin now and that's what I, I mean, every everywhere is going to be ruined. Right. That's the, that when I was driving down through California, it was making me real sad because I was like, oh, this is all really great. But I was like, one day it's going to be ruined. It'll all slide into the ocean.

People come in here and put in some corporations. Well, people are leaving California, so it might be the opposite. Yeah. Might be more farmland. Maybe so. Yeah.

All right. That's about all I had. It is gardening. Yeah. Are you happy with how much we covered? I thought it was really great. I thought it was good too. I enjoyed it.

I think we took a lot of time with the comments, but I enjoyed it. Anything else you want to say about gardening? I say do it. I mean, grow a little bit of something. Don't worry about what all these people say out here about how to do it and what to stay away from. Just grow something. You know you're going to want to watch a little something. I think James Pregioni is really good. He's really good at showing you. The thing that...

That's a big thing isn't it? Just like gardening experts and... Yeah. What would he be considered? I mean I would say he's an expert. I mean, but I mean, what's his title? I don't know. Gardener. Okay.

I don't know. I don't know who that is. Um, but it's like, you know, the problem watching him is he's so successful with his garden that you're like, ah, it's like, it almost makes you feel bad about yourself, but he goes through, tells you how to do things. He's really good at it. He's fairly entertaining. And I think it's good.

And I just, I think you should grow something. You're never gonna grow everything to survive. And people, you know, had people ask me, how much money are you saving by growing these vegetables? I go, oh, nothing. It's costing me way more. But it's about getting some health into your life. When I was growing up, the county jail,

they had a garden and the inmates went out and worked the garden. And it was great because it gave them something to do. They're out in the sun. And then they would give the vegetables that they grew to some local produce places. Yeah. It was a win-win for everybody. Yeah. Take your shoes off. Get out there. Don't wear sunscreen. If you're like, you know, do it a little bit at a time. Get yourself a little base tan. Ease yourself out there. Don't cover your skin with chemicals. If you have to do a

sunscreen, find a, you know, a healthy one. Mm- healthy one and just breathe in the fresh air. Touch some dirt. It's good for you. I love that. It's beautiful. Don't and don't wear your headphones. Don't listen to a podcast. Don't listen to music. Just listen to nature. Listen. Yeah. Just listen to that. Two straight weeks. We've had someone in kind of, I know, as I was just thinking that it's been ended with kind of an inspirational speech too. And this is getting me fired up. Ben's great. I love Ben. I hate history. I love Ben. We have Ben on next week. Hate gardening. Love Dusty. Don't

believe in gardening, but I, I like Dusty a lot. All right. Where are you going to get? Ben's one of my oldest friends in Nashville comedy. For sure. He's always been around, he's always been a cigar guy, so we've always been friends. Yeah. Where are you gonna be this weekend, young? April, yeah, that's April 26th, that's this Saturday.

I'm at the Ben Theater in West Bend. Awesome. Wisconsin, this is Brian Bates speaking have you ever done this theater I have how awesome yeah it's very cool it's in a cool city a cool little town you're gonna love it man it's great great green room awesome awesome and I'll tell them why it's called a green ring yeah I want to be interested so you should start doing that everywhere you go I don't know why they's called a green room. Everyone will be interested. You should start doing that everywhere you go. You know why this is called a...

I don't know why they call it a green thumb, but I know why they call it a green room. May 9th, Madisonville, Kentucky at the Ballard Convention Center. May 16th and 17th, Salt Lake City Wise Guys. Whoa. Very excited to be back at Wise Guys. You and I did it one time. It's been a couple years since I've been there, so I'm so excited to be at at Wise Guys. You and I did it one time. It's been a couple years since I've been there, so I'm so excited to be at Wise Guys Comedy Club in Salt Lake City. Good deal, dude. May 16th. This is Aaron Weber speaking. May 16th, Greensburg, Pennsylvania. The live casino. I'm gonna be there. I'm gonna be there. May 16th, just outside of Pittsburgh. And then just to round out the month, May 31st, South Bend,

Indiana, June 1st, the next day, Fort Wayne, Indiana. Nice. I'm taking over the state. I'm taking it back. Come see me, South Bend and Fort Wayne, Indiana. All right. I got this weekend off for the draft. And, but next weekend, December, or. What? Jeez. I started to read the city name.

May 2nd, Denver, Colorado. Everybody at this table's favorite city. Wow. Denver, Colorado, I'll be table's favorite city. Wow. Denver, Colorado, I'll be there May 2nd. May 3rd, Colorado Springs, Colorado. Nice. And then, you know, May 16th, I'm gonna be in Portland, Maine.

And then May 17th, I'm doing my very first theater show in New York City. Whoa! What theater? It's uh, what is it? I don't know. It's not listed here. But uh, it's beautiful man. It's uh, I'm very excited about it. You can tell. Yeah, I am excited about it. Yeah. But I don't, I don't get into the details. Radio City, Radio City Music Hall. It's called Town Hall. I bet it's Town Hall, radio city music hall. Maybe town hall. Is it called town hall? I bet it's town hall, yeah. That rules.

That sounds like a trick. You could be arrested. Yeah, it could be. He said, man. Yeah, town hall. That's a big deal, dude. That's like a milestone gig in New York City. Very exciting.

So that's a big deal, man. That's awesome. That's awesome. Heck yeah. Look at us, huh? Just really doing it. We're doing it. What about us? Just doing it, you know? And there'll be a lot of people that are going to be like, oh, my gosh, I'm going to be like, oh, my gosh, I'm going to be like, oh, my gosh, I'm going to be like, oh, my gosh, I'm going to be like, oh, my gosh, I That's awesome. Heck yeah. Look at us, huh?

Just really doing it. We're doing it. What about us? Just doing it, you know, and there'll be a lot of comments going, uh, well, he called us the Nate-less podcast now. And it's like, uh, you know, take it easy guys. It's like, uh, we're all professional comedians. That's right. We're doing stuff.

I think Nate's back next week. Right. So, okay. That's great. I're doing stuff. I think Nate's back next week. Right? So. Okay. That's great. I'm excited to see you. I just, I see these comments all the time. And people, like, Nate has been like, hey, I'm gonna be gone for a while. And then people are still like, oh, he can't even show up to his own podcast.

It's like, hey, we're professional comedians. Yeah. And, you know, incredible podcasters. You want to wrap it up, Dusty? Yeah. Close it out. Yeah. Wrap it up. How do you close it up? Well, guys, get out there, grow something. Yeah. Show Brian Bates why they call it a green thumb and get out there and grow

some things. Comment in on YouTube. Tell us what you're growing. Yeah. What are you growing? Send in the Nate Land Facebook group. Show us things that you've grown. Thank you guys for listening. We're having a good time. Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife Laura on the AudioBoom platform. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.