The Nateland Podcast - 268: #268 Comedy Cowboys ft. Henry Cho & John Crist

Episode Date: September 3, 2025

This week, John Crist is back and Henry Cho joins the gang. Aaron introduces the guys to a new way of power washing your house, Henry shares an awkward moment during an earthquake, and Brian once again tries to share some facts about cowboys.  Magic Spoon: MagicSpoon.com/NATE Get 5$ off your next order at MagicSpoon.com/NATE or look for Magic Spoon on Amazon or in your nearest grocery store.   DeleteMe: joindeleteme.com/NATE Get 20% off your DeleteMe plan when you go to joindeleteme.com/NATE and use promo code NATE at checkout.   Superpower: Superpower.com Go to Superpower.com to learn more and lock in the special $199 price while it lasts. Live up to your 100-Year potential. #superpowerpod #ad   Rocket Money- Rocketmoney.com/nate Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/NATE today!

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I never realized I had bad socks until I tried Bombas. Now they're all I want to wear. Head over to bombas.com slash Nate and use code Nate for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S.com slash Nate. Code Nate at checkout. Hello, folks, and hey, bear. Welcome to the Nate Land podcast on Nate Bargetzi, Brian Bates, Aaron Weber, and for a good time, filling in for Dusty. Henry Cho, and John Christ.

It takes two of us. Well, John wouldn't leave. I'm back. I wasn't invited to this. You were. We know. Yeah, I'll be just here. We know.

I'm waiting on the open. He just never got up from last week. Well, it's too good of a hang, though. Like, it was like, we're all here. You're like, oh, well, it should be hanging out. Yeah, stick around. Yeah, we should do this. A couple of, Nateland Presents, the showcase season three is here.

Tune to the Nate Land YouTube channel for the premiere of Jeremy. Adler, Alder, right? Alder. Jeremy Alder. Showcase premieres this Friday night, September 5th. Also, we're taping Ryan Hamilton's Netflix special. Two shows, October 4th at the Neptune Theater in Seattle. There's some tickets left for the 7 and some tickets for the 930 as well. Come out to that. It's going to be an awesome, awesome taping. Ryan is unbelievable. So, all right. We really, you know, we weren't anywhere. because we're... Yeah, well, we had Labor Day. I was in Chicago.

Oh, that's right. We're pre-recording this, so... I'm actually going to Chicago. Went about the way you thought. Sold out, standing on. Yep. Normal, typical. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, yep.

Tuller Fowler. Chicago and Labor Day. Mm-hmm. That's good. Yeah. Well, I mean... And where was this show in Liberty? Zanis.

Oh, good for you, man. It was sold out. National Guard came in. I did hear that. Yeah. National Guard. Yeah, they're talking about... For looking for ice.

Talk about... That's a different thing. That's a different thing. They go... Two separate things. We hear Brian Bates' show sold out. He goes, I'll tell you, I bet I know what it is. It's a lot of ice agents.

Agents, oh, no. No, I wasn't... We weren't saying the agents. Yeah. He does shows for... He'll do shows for anybody. He will. Brian Bates, that's your new tour.

My border's wide open. Come on into shows. I think I did a joke about that. I did a military tour for the troops in the Middle East and I was like, well, who's troops? They were like, let's do it. I had a joke, like, yeah, I would see. That's my joke.

Bob Hope I did that joke. Yeah. I thought it was the first. Yeah, that's everybody. After Steve Allen. Everybody did that joke? I wrote Boy of My Arms Tired. I wrote that.

You know Gilbert Garfrey's joke about that, right? No. What is it? Have you ever heard this? I mean, maybe. So Gilbert. Can you do it in his voice? That's what I'm getting ready to do.

So Gilbert goes, Henry, you got to come down. I wrote this joke. So we all go down. He goes, ladies and gentlemen, I was in Dallas, Texas, when John F. Kennedy got shot, died right in my arms. I was in Memphis when Dr. Martin Luther King got shot, died right in my arms. Ladies and gentlemen, I just flew here from Jonestown. boy are my arms tired

the greatest joke ever yeah to do to do something so different that's why like on just that it's like perfect yeah

yeah it's unbelievable oh it was we were all in the back just going god you're so good yeah just I never had the I never had the

like the guts to say someone stole my joke I don't have that much confidence in my You know, people have said it to you. Yeah, no, people have, but I feel like, hey, that's my joke. If it's something like very surface level like that, you're like, I'm not, I don't believe stealing is as much as people think. That's what I say.

We're all thinking about the same jokes. It's more parallel thinking than anything. But it's kind of arrogant to say. Now, when it's verbatim, you kind of go, hey, hang on. Now, if a white guy goes up and goes, I was born and raised in Knoxville, Tennessee, and I'm Korean. Yeah, that would be something. Which I have done. and it's the only one that worked right

that's why I did it I do it whenever I'm not with Henry cadence is what you got a I think people take people's cadence right there's style and the way they tell a joke because that's the that's the secret sauce

that makes everything funny for a person is kind of how they how they deliver a joke and a punch yeah and I mean because Norm McDonald would say totally different than Gilbert than you and then I, you know, and then Bates would throw his version in. I'm kidding, man. Do you think you're...

So here's the thing, though, with the Internet, you know, like one of my jokes has become a meme, and some guy just put it out there. And I actually had some random woman in the grocery store came out, and I goes, hey, I heard a joke you should maybe try. And I said, what is it? And she told me, and I go, you know, that's mine, right? I started that, yeah. She's like, what was it?

Yeah. A couple weeks ago, my wife got her identity stolen, but the guy's spending less money, I'm going to let it right. Yeah, yeah. And so that was a good idea. Yeah. And I mean, gosh, I don't know, 20 years ago.

Yeah. And now it's a meme. And I mean, people, I... Like, this guy's funny. You're like, that's... That's where stuff is getting stolen. That's where stuff is... Yeah.

By non-professionals. By non-profession. Yeah. Yeah. Movies? Yeah. Movies are another. Oh, yeah.

What do you mean? And commercials. Yes, commercials. I mean, that Brian Regan, they got that one joke with Brian, the commercial U2 is insane. Oh, yeah, yeah. He started that. Yeah. Dude, I heard.

I'm not even saying that another person might not have come up with that. But the, so it's, you could even say, like, maybe they didn't steal it intentionally. But when that joke is so associated with one person, that's when it's like, all right. That's a great way to put it. It's almost, you could. tell me, look, I didn't intentionally steal it. You're like, that's fine, but you're going to pay for something. Yeah.

Because that's like too crazy of a thing. He said that I think I heard it say with like AI and with the, where the internet is going now, the people with the origination, that's what we were talking about the last pot is like, it's hard to write jokes. It's hard to write jokes. Right. And then there's like somebody that takes it, does a voiceover of it, does an audio of it, and then podcast reacts to it.

Like all the origination is getting is less and less people. because all those advertising agencies are looking at the stuff that's already on the internet. They're not coming up with the new, it's all, the origination of the idea is less and less and less people. Because now like... There's no creed. People are less and less creative. What you did with every pastor is like using chat GPT. Oh yeah.

They were like, what are five characteristics about David and Goliath that these people wouldn't know? And they're all coming up with, it's like... The exact same. None of it is original. That's what I was saying. The Brian Regan joke was so original, but now it's in the lexicon of, like, everybody does that. Everybody says that now. But, yeah, he was the first guy to make it an observation.

He thought of that. And now it's everywhere. Like, bless your heart, is that. Everybody says that. But if somebody was the first person. John Reet. Was it? No.

It's very. Actually, it was Henry. It might have been Henry. It was Henry. But then there's tons. John Reap. I don't know. John Reap say it. I just said that because I thought it was... John Reek did it. Yeah, yeah.

Have you ever thought somebody stole your joke? No, I don't think I ever would have given it any weight. If, you know, I had one when I talked about shaking the baby. And some comics came and did a joke about that. But I never think they stole it. They had a baby. And a comic had a baby. And so they went and saw what I saw and wrote a joke about a comic having a baby. and so it was never no they didn't take it for me i could tell i always looked at it i remember someone saying once is like if you still a joke or if someone stole your joke it's like

you then you got to write a better one yeah it should be better and then and so any joke that i had that was like somewhat stolen it was usually a pretty broad topic where it was like you know what yeah i could see it but again my dad's a magician and clown and blah blah whatever you're like, then it would have been more obvious. But if you put yourself in the story, you're not putting your, I mean, I'm just in my stories. I'm talking about myself kind of revolving around me. It's almost like you can't. Can't take it.

Take it. And then you're just doing your persona. And then, you know. Right. It's you not even telling the joke. It's just how you would tell a story. They're buying a ticket to see you. Right.

Like that's the difference. Who's the most stealable? comic on this here on here of all five of us Henry's got the most materials yeah

that's yeah but yeah I mean just through the years yeah it's there just that

yeah but but trust me about 80% it's not worth stealing maybe maybe 85 yeah yeah

and then 5% of that's Asian so there's 10% of my action that's what I take so actually I have been least amount of material you could actually still but you so you know the old guys out you know I brought up Bob Hope and those guys those guys used to tell each other's jokes uh when they would go these do these casinos and things you know because some guys were in new york some guys were in

Vegas some guys were in l.A and they would just tell each other's jokes and it wasn't a big deal because there wasn't television they didn't go on the radio to promote and uh did you ask you ask or just do it. I think they just kind of did. You know, I was, I was, you know, I've been very blessed meeting these old guy heroes back in the day, you know, and I got to meet Milton Burrell, and I was talking to Uncle Miltie about this. And he goes, oh, yeah, you know, when I did cat skills, I did a part of mine, I did a little bit of Bob, I did a little bit of son. And I'm like, okay. He goes, you know, kind of how singers do cover tunes. That's kind of how we did it. Yeah. And I joke with musicians all the time going, you know, I'll do the opera and somebody will

do three songs. Not one of them theirs. And I go, you know, I'm going to go out and do five minutes of Cosby, five minutes of Seinfeld, and then two minutes of mine, how's that? And they're like, what, you can't do that? I go, yeah. Yeah, you're right, I can't do that. Yeah, yeah. But you just saying, you know,

devil went down to Georgia. Yeah. So, yeah. I agree. I think in Vegas, they were, somebody was workshopping like a comedy karaoke. But then they were like, well, racially, it would get a little trick. but you're like play the Chris Rock.

That would be great. You'd be like look up the Jim Gaffigan bit. You could scroll through and then you do the bit. They have that at the Comedy Museum. They do? Yeah, they have a carry. They, you go and put like a Seinfeld bit in it,

then you stand on stage and it shows you the words and you read it in their cadence. Wow. But it's, but it's, but it's not his voice. It's your voice. You're doing his joke. So you got to really know their cadence. Like I was able to, I could do Seinfelds,

because I just had that CD memorized. But it's, yeah, you realize it's an interesting thing to even do as a comic because you realize how different people's cadences are. And you realize how much you're in your own cadence, that it's hard to kind of come out of it. It'd be fun to see you do like earthquake or something like that. Yeah, just to see. Bruce, Bruce, yeah.

I mean, it's like just saying it, reading, it would be tough. I mean, maybe if I could look at the joke and be like, all right, let me do this joke and like write it the way. I would have to write it a way that I would say it. Because that's the, there's a lot of stuff that you, the way you write it, you're like, you're like, I got a, you know, so when someone gives you a tag or something, you're like, look, that's very funny. I'm not going to, I'm never going to sell that. I wouldn't say that. I just can't say it. But, but at the museum, that's more, is that, is that for comedians to go in and try for other people.

No, no, no, it's more just, yeah, for patrons, got it. Yeah, got it. And I just did it because we were there. But, yeah, the fun thing about stand-em comedy, stand-in comedy, it's, again, I was, I always tell it, people is, it's a very newish art form. The fact that you even met Milton Burrell is insane. Like, but that's how new it is.

Right. You know, like it's not, causeably still alive. Right, yeah. So you're, then the form that we know. stand-up kind of, I know it was around all the blah, blah, whatever. But the form of how we kind of know it, I mean, would it be Cosby is kind of like the first, like he talked about his family, he talked about, personal. Observation. And I'm sure there's people I'm missing. But in that general scheme of the years of when that was, that's not that longer.

I saw him in college. Yeah. Yeah. 20 years. And then, so if you see where we're at now with stand-up, it's kind of becoming its own kind of thing where it's like you're, you're almost going to, you're almost going to get, I think, get to see music, the way music got hot is you're going to see stand-up, where stand-up's going to be looked at as music where people are going to try to find someone very young, maybe new, and they want to just see them develop and watch them along the way. But stand-comedy is in a different place and it's ever been. and that's what's so fun about it. The biggest, when I, I mean, I've been going to stand up for 15 years.

I mean, you're doing, like, look, we're all just doing stand-up comedy. I know we're doing this podcast, but in the, you're... No, we tell, we make a live and telling jokes. Yeah. And that was, uh, not everybody could do that. No, no. Back in the day. Very few.

And the difference nowadays than like the big wave in the 80s, early 90s, when people would go to a comedy club just to go see comedy. Yeah. And then, you know, a lot of people we all blame, you know, my generation, we blamed it on over saturation of television because we were on every night. And there's so many opportunities to be on TV that people stopped going to clubs. And then, you know, Seinfeld, Roseanne, Tim Allen, all these guys got their own TV shows. So all of a sudden, there was only a handful of comics out there that had a name that was even semi-recognizable. And so guys, you know, I was fortunate, Brian Regan, Jake Johansson, probably Bobby Slayton, just got over the hump and we could still bring a crowd into a comedy club. But no one else could because no one heard of you. And the newness of, hey, let's go to the comedy club was gone. But now it's back. There are people who come here to Zanis just to go see a comedy show.

They're not going to go see Brian Bates just because Brian Bates. just because Brian Bates is here. They're just going to... I mean, when we do this Monday, Nate Land Live show is... You don't know who's on the lineup. They just come. And then they do new material at Zanis,

and you don't know who's on line up. So, I mean, people are starting to... Yeah, I was on the Zanis All-Star show here this past Saturday. You're an All-Star? Well, no, but I was on the show. And 845, great crowd. They didn't know who was on lineup, but there's just there. Yeah, they just go.

Yeah. So you're right, Nate. There is a new... attitude towards comedy. Look at sports. It's the way I think stand up, you're going to see it kind of change with, you know, a sports where it was like this thing and then it's evolving into this newish thing, where it can probably start getting broken up into, you know, there's going to be entertainers

and there's going to be, because with the internet you got all these different personalities. But it's still going to have to come back to that can you create an act? can you to me to buy a ticket to and come and be happy and satisfied and enjoy the show right but it has become an event or it wasn't always in an event yes and look what you're doing yeah yeah look what you're doing your show is an event for that many people to go and show up and park and go up an escalator yeah i never thought i'd ever hear of anyone having to take an escalator to go see a comedy show Unless it was in a mall. Yeah, yeah, okay? Yeah, we've been there. Okay?

That's what, yeah, like, when you, like, Seinfeld and like, I remember Seinfeld tell me with Yaakov Smyranoff, he was like open for him in a theater and 3,000 people. And he's like, I just couldn't, you know, that would be like doing Madison Square Garden. Like, it was like, oh, no one saw a comedian in the theater. No, it was crazy. No one could see you. And you felt like you couldn't. I remember touring with Reba McIntyre back in the 90s.

We're doing 12,000. people outside. Yeah. And, you know, unfortunately, I had to go out first, and it was still daylight. So there's no IMAG. You know, they'd hear my last minute. They could barely see me on the screens. And, you know, I was just up there just taking one on the chin for the paycheck

and saying I opened for tour to free of MacDard. But it was too many people, you know. And, I mean, I commend you. I, because, you know, I haven't gone to an arena show ever. and it's nothing I just you know heck we're both busy it's not like I can follow you on yeah yeah but I don't even know how you do it I wouldn't know how to do it to me and where my being and my creativity and what the way I do it I mean it's just like you just said Seinfeld I mean that's the whole generational thing I think I told you before we went and saw

Steve Martin at Universal Amphitheater a bunch of comedians like Larry Miller and all these guys Dennis and Wilburton we're like going man how do you do that how do you do a room this big. You know, we were doing 300-seat comedy clubs. Yeah, yeah. Every night and that's all we knew. And then the theaters, you do, yeah, okay, maybe there's 500 or maybe there's 700,

okay, that we can handle. But then you get into the 3,000. You know, when Foxworthy started the Blue Collar Tour, you know, Jeff was selling 2000, Engval was selling 1,500, then he and both of them went and did a show and all of a sudden they could sell 5,000.

Yeah. And both of them were like going, but that room is so big. It's so big. Because just, you know, the generational, the generation I came up in, that's just so big. I mean, if I do 2000. You're like, dude, in the 90s,

you were like, yeah, but that was a different company. Yeah, we wore bigger shorts and stuff. Yeah, it was a different comedy. It was. The round is big in the arena. So being in the middle is what, like, I, when I did end stage,

for me, how, what helped was I just had to go through every single phase. So there was never a leap. It was always, like, I just went to the, the next thing. And so it's like a slow build into it. So you're able to kind of like wrap my head around more and more. The arenas are intense. I would agree you can't have really your opener's got to be able to be headliners on their own right. You cannot put people too young up there. They cannot handle it. Especially you're in the round now. The round helps

a lot. When you're in the round and we got it set up now where we got these, I've made the stage circler. I've gotten the screens bigger for people. I've got to make sure the audio's everywhere. So it's this setup that I want you to feel like you're watching a live special taping. And what's fun about the cameras is, look, if you're in a, you know, if you're in a 2000 seat

theater, if you're in the back, I can't see your face. Right. So it screens help no matter what you're going to be in. Well, with this of the screens, you just embrace it. And I mean, I just play into those screens. And you get laughs off looks that I never got. You can play.

smaller than you can't even at a club yeah it's unbelievable when you're gonna laugh it gets crazy to you to laugh sometimes and you're like why are they laughing and because i'm just used to like i always make that face but no one can see that face right and then but now because of the way i'm doing it into this camera it's just you hear this pop and you're like oh dude this like it just adds so much so much you got to come do it then like because you just i mean you see it where it's this it's it's awesome i would like y'all to because i would like y'all to because That's like I do like seeing some of the guys, the older guys to be like, I would like y'all to come see it to be because it's that idea.

Everybody thinks you can't do it in this world. You can. It's like, I mean, they're just on you. It can feel very intimate in like a club, even though it's big and it's a lot of people. But you're just kind of in it and you're make your little circle and stuff. But people have to be real headliners. I mean, you cannot. That's like the idea of young comics.

I mean, newer, like, it's, it's just too big. It's too big. It's too big of a situation. And, I mean, honestly, I have to keep an eye on it with, we have a lot of great openers. People I start with the guys here. But it's like, I keep an eye if, you know, because you're getting to where you're like, you can't, it's too big of a thing. Yep. And I want this show to be so.

I want everybody to be murdering. Right. It's this big, big, big show. But that's the right attitude. I mean, that's how, you know, all the guys, I mean, even Brian Regan asked me, why do I use, you know, guys like Aaron and, well, not you, Brian. But guys like Aaron, I mean, Bates. You never call me either, bro.

All these guys, you know, why are your opener so strong? I said, because I want my show to pop. I mean, I had Jake Gullidge would get up a standing O opening, you know. And people were like, that's crazy. I go, no, you don't understand. If they'll stand for him, I'm guaranteed. Yeah. That's how hot this crowd is.

Yeah, you want to, yeah. So you want your opener. You want to follow that. You want to follow that energy. Yeah. It's like when you go up behind when it's bombing, I mean, it's infuriating. Well, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not self-inviting, but yeah, I would love to come see it. And if I get to be good enough headliner, I'll maybe I'll do it with you.

If I can, if you think. If you can figure it out. If I'll figure it out. Yeah. But it would be a totally different thing. Yeah, but you would know how to do it. Like, I just wanted you to see it and fill it, and it's like, that's great. Yeah.

Yeah, because it's crazy. Yeah. Do you have a joke work at a, like work at a club, and then you're like, this is not going to work in an arena? It's bigger. I mean, like, so this special I was thinking about not when I taped this next one, I was like, I don't know if I'm going to tape an arena again and whatever, which I don't know for sure what's going to happen, but it almost probably has to be in an arena. Because I'm just, I mean, it's made me a lot bigger.

I was never someone, if you put me back on the theater, I'm not going to move. When I do Vegas, I kind of go back to not really moving and stay in the middle. But when I'm in the round and I'm just the whole time making this circle, I mean, I do so much more because it just naturally doesn't feel as awkward to me. You walk in a circle? Yeah, because I'm in the round. So I just do a pace and I hit the cameras. But I've started, I mean, now I can hit the cameras like, I mean, it's awesome.

It's a performance. I was going to say it's almost performance art. because you're moving. Yes. Yeah. So you're not just standing there telling jokes. You're actually performing some jokes. I mean, now you can picture, like, when I'm talking about my house or my family,

I think I can make you picture my house. You can picture me standing however I'm standing in whatever way. Right. It's like the most addicting thing I've ever done. Yeah. Yeah. You ever thought about a revolving stage? And just stay in there and not let the stage do it.

That's why Dusty thought it was. Some guys do it was. Oh, Dusty thought it was? A lot of celebrity theater is the, in Phoenix. Yep. Yeah. Yep. That's going to be my prop show.

It's part of it. Yeah, but you want to like, it's, you'll get dizzy. You may get dizzy. You're going to get dizzy. You're going to have. And then it's not going to work. The crowd's going to be, like, once they pass you, then they just got to sit and wait. It's kind of like on a merry around.

Yeah. We'll get some popcorn. Wait until he comes around again. Yeah, because I'm moving around a lot quicker than that. Oh. Like, so if you're good, for you not to get. dizzy. I mean, once you pass someone, you'll be about 25 minutes before you get back to them.

Yeah. Do you tell the openers where the cameras are or not? Yeah, yeah. You know where they are. Yeah. Whether they use them or not, they should. But they, you know, but they got to know how to use them. That's the thing. You've got to be, it's not a, it's, you know who it is, like Joel Osteen.

Yeah. He, when he delivers the, when he delivers the punchline, not the punchline, but he goes, he goes crowd, crowd, and then he goes right to the camera. Watch Joel Osteen. to go right to that camera he draws you that's just tv that's how i got saved yeah that's just tv by joelstein no i'm just joking but yeah he makes you feel like you're i would i would give another attempt at that's true no but that's just tv i mean yeah yeah to watch but you deliver the punchline right to the lens of that camera is what you're saying you know where they are you know where the cameras

you know if there's an act out or something do it at the camera or facial expression i got a lot of i go hey go down to the stool when i go to this part you know oh you got your Yeah, yeah, he's got a lot of... Just keep it on the wide shot. They're not a tripod. They're on the shoulder. You got a, you got a roamer. Hey, I'm going to go to, I'm going to go behind the stool.

So really zoom in on that. Does that camera go outside? My clothes is outside. You got to take the whole, you've got to go outside. Everybody's going to get it. Oh, man. You know that feeling when you're a kid sitting cross-legged in front of the TV? Saturday morning cartoons blasting. You're diving into a giant bowl of colorful sugary cereal.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's my favorite bowl. Yeah, my daughter loves it. It's like, no, I'm serious. No, it's just me and your daughter eat the same. Yeah. It's a fun bowl. Whether you're trying to be carb conscious or just want a simple, wholesome snack that actually tastes amazing, magic spoon is it. Get $5 off your next order at magic spoon.com slash Nate or look for magic spoon on Amazon or in front of your or in your nearest grocery store.

That's magic spoon.com slash Nate for $5 off. Yeah, I got a new, my new show. I have a new, it's kind of a prop slash illusion. I know. Carrotop told me you were doing. You know what you said? What? Chris is stealing again.

Yeah. When he retires, I'm looking for an opening. He's got a warehouse. He's got a warehouse. Maybe you just go get his old stuff. Yeah. I'm just going to ease in, I think, this tour. I think it'd be, you go to Caratop.

I think it'd be, I've never met him. He knows him. He's awesome. I know him. You know him. So go, give me three things. Let me, how do I? Give me three things from night.

From 1997. Yeah. Come on. No. I know you don't do them anymore. You don't got a toilet seat somewhere I can get? How do I say? Wait, how do I start?

It's the bat with the umbrella. It's the bat with the umbrella. Yeah. Just go. He's got a baseball bat with an umbrella. Just go to Caratop. I think you would just go give me, give me a couple of things. Yeah.

Yeah, again, 1997. Caratops. Caratop's one of the more prolific entertainers of all time. Yes. How much stuff he makes and how often and he's like doing it. great at it, yeah. So, but I'm sure he's got stuff. You'd like, send me to the back corner of a warehouse.

Yeah. Yeah. All right, let me pitch one more. Can I pitch one more? Okay, so the glass, it's a clear glass of water on the stool. I keep drinking out of it. It keeps filling back up because there's water in the stool. So you're a magician also.

Yeah, you just want to do magic. Thank you, that's awesome, dude. No, no, but it's a comedy show. The illusions are not the main thing. They're just like a part of it. These are just like, yeah. You went from prop. to a magician.

Well, it's, who's to define it? You know what? Nate's dad does that. Yeah. Well, I'll go a tour with him. Yeah. Yeah. I bet Nate's dad has some stuff you could.

If I kept drinking out of it in a cap-free feeling, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, my dad, you know what you could do? An easy solution might get hard to, you're going to Vegas next week, though. Oh, yeah. You're going to Vegas? Yeah. You're going to go. Let me pop around.

You actually are probably at Vegas. Oh, you're at Vegas. Yeah, I'll go. So you're at Vegas. So you're at Vegas. So let me pop around to the other shows, see what's going on. I'm trying to get into the game. That's what we used to do.

I'm trying to get into the prop game. We used to always just pop around everybody. Go to my, you can come to my dad's house. And I guarantee my dad, I said, if you want to try a prop out, my dad could get you. I bet he has a prop. Something cool. But mine's going to be different because what if I never mention it? Well, yeah, but you need the props.

I'm just saying, don't worry about creating the prop. Just let people that have done it. Here's the thing we never mention it. That is, everybody thinks that. That never works. It doesn't. See, that's always, it's a very funny thing for us to talk about, and we all laugh in the moment. And that's the only thing.

And that's the only time it's funny. And when they're out there, and then, I mean, maybe if you're lucky, 50 years from now, some guy goes, yeah, I got it. That last thing was, yeah. I want to be like a comedian's version of, like, you know how like Taylor Swift always drops, like, little hints about things. I want to be that. You're like, oh, this guy's on the next level. Good luck with that. really good luck

I think yeah, call Caratop it starts this fall I'm starting to ease it in You know Caratop had to cancel the Tonight Show way back when

he was, have you ever heard this story? So he was doing the Birmingham Comedy Club not the Star Dome Yeah There's a Birmingham Comedy Club and he was supposed to do

the tonight show the following Tuesday and he kept his trunk at the comedy club and it burned down so Scott calls me and goes you and all my haters

he goes you're not a hater but all the guys who don't like the prop guys will love this I go what he goes I had to cancel the tonight show Tuesday because my act burned he couldn't build rebuild the props

yeah that's tough so there you go so just think about that it's a risk I'm willing to take it I'm willing to take it we always have to have backups yeah oh don't sit on that stool not that one not that one not that one Not that one. A funny, my favorite part of that story is when Jay Leno mentioned it on The Tonight Show, he made fun of the club.

Oh, yeah. He said like a little rinky dink comedy club. And then he felt so bad about it that he called Bruce at Stardome and was like, I feel bad that I trashed the club. And he recorded all these radio spots for the club for free to give them because he felt that. Yeah. You sure? That's cool. Yeah.

Yeah. I love that. Well, Jay, that's Jay, because Jay's a comic. Yeah. Jay's a comic. Jay's a comic. Yeah. All right, read,

comments, comments. It's started. I'm going to see that. Stephanie Sellers. Last time he was on the podcast, I 100% believed Henry Cho called his wife a B word and was so upset. Then I went back and used closed captioning

and was comforted to know he said best. Wow. Yeah, the guy who's never cussed on stage in 40 years. I got on podcast. And call her. Seems not a character. Well, stand-up's going in a new direction. Yeah.

Hey. Also, no reaction from the rest of us either. Yeah. Yeah, we get it. We hear you, buddy. We've met her. We know her. We've met her.

Seth Lynch. I was wondering, have you ever worked on a joke forever? Finally feel like you got it just right. Maybe even filmed it. Then after all that, you find a better way into it or make it funnier. Does that drive you nuts or is that just the way it goes and part of the process? It's the way it goes, and it's part of the process. You always film it and then make it the best it's ever been.

I don't like it when you get a huge joke, like really close up to the special. You didn't get much mileage out of this because I only told this joke a month. And now it's burned versus sometimes at the beginning. You're like, dude, I got 16 months out of this joke. Yeah, but sometimes it's exhausting. It's like because you have it so long. You don't like tell it anymore. And you're just like, you're tired of it about time you tape.

and you're like, I haven't been telling it that long. Now I know, like, I can get, like, my history, the history joke is one that I told, wherever mold, I can't remember anything. About your surprise. The surprise. Every history movie I watch, I watch on the edge of my seat. But that was a longer joke, and then I cut it down to those words. But I knew, the whole time I did it, I was like, it's just too clunky.

It would get a laugh, and you're like, no. That's too many. But then you shortened it and it worked. It worked perfectly. Yeah. That's what I tell all the new guys. Well, you know this. They always guys go, hey, what advice?

I go, well, I was always told by Seinfeld and channeling these guys. You take a two minute bit and you stretch it to four and then you make it two again. Yeah, yeah. Just take the best two minutes. And, you know, and they're like going, what if the bits? I go, look, it's just a one minute, make it two. It's just 30 seconds, make it a one minute. You don't have to make every bit.

four minutes and they're like okay yeah but you don't never have any uh uh when a you like a current events joke it's funny that it's like it's like diminishing returns as you keep going you're like the event happened and then it's like hilarious the first week and then it's like all right i gotta get maybe three days i got to put this on the internet or get rid of it right because there's nobody yeah yeah i mean i still got a prick 20 25 minutes about covid but i'm getting rid of i'm getting rid of it though it's killing it's killing it's at least 28 minutes yeah it's killing well that's the most fun to get back into something when you

already done it. That's the best. I've always done it. You have a Christmas joke and it's... Yeah. Oh, like it's back around? And it's like March and you're like, you guys, it's about to be summer or so you're like, springs coming. My favorite holiday, my favorite time of December,

Christmas. Boom. I love getting bad. Like, it's so funny to... Because every comic's done it. And it's just very fun to see, you know. Oh, you've got... Oh, yeah. The Olympics. Oh, yeah.

Olympic joke. that you can pull out. Oh, yeah, only once every four years. Well, it's every two now because it would be a winter Olympic jokes, but by the summer Olympics are happening. But it's like any big sporting event is a way into it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know. So you can find that way.

You can segue, you know, nice and broad. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Somehow I got to find a way to get into this. It's very fun. I always enjoy it. I like watching it too because it's like when it's Christmas time or something,

you're like, yeah, I mean, it's like you're dining off of it. Yeah. And then it gets, you know, And it's like, you know, July. And you're like, doesn't work. You're trying to be like figuring out, oh, it's too hot.

Can't wait until Christmas comes out. How would you get into it? The neighborhood, I have a neighborhood act joke about the neighborhood app about Halloween. Yeah. And I'll be like, last Halloween or like Halloween's coming up. That's the easy way to do it. But I have like a six months that you're like,

how are you going to get to Halloween here? Yeah. If you're talking about something specific that happened. At Halloween. You could talk about that app. I would make it more broad about the app. And then you can just go like, last Halloween. Or you just go when Halloween's around, I mean, it's a zoo.

It's the, you know, because then you're broadly talking about it. But I know what you mean. You have to go, like, last Halloween. But when you're straight up, like exactly six months away from it. Yeah. And it's December. Like beach, beach humor. And it's like, this December.

You got to find out. Yeah. What's your favorite holiday? Yeah. Can you hear Halloween in the back? Speaking of. Is your birthday? Yeah.

I was, it's always, my dad was like, dude, you say like, he's like, you say like the other day a lot in your show. You did. The other day was a big day. The other day was a big day. Yeah, the other day, it was like, dude, like, you see somebody in the tonight show. He's like, on the cab, on the way over here, I go, all right, there's no way. You didn't write your tonight shift in the cab.

On the way over here. But you can't say in a cab three months ago. So you're like, oh, yeah, you just kind of, yeah, you just kind of figure it out. It's poetic. We need like a comedy. We need like a comedy fact checker. Like, when did this happen? Yeah, well, I mean, but you can tell, I mean, I remember telling jokes about my daughter and then you're still telling them.

And then you'll be like, I mean, she's three years older than. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. People would go, how are your kids? I go, for this show, they're big. It's simple. Very simple.

That's a great. Yeah, that's so fun. That is the best way to do it. Tonight, 18 and 12. Yeah. Defense, yeah. Or like something, yeah, you're referencing, I think, you're referencing like a style. I heard a comic reference, like, dude, jeans are like so skinny now that you can, I go, well, we don't wear those jeans.

Like, we don't wear that anymore. So either everybody's like, this is old. Yeah. This joke is old. No guy is noticing that someone's doing a skinny gene joke. and it's out of season. Yeah, well, I do. Except you.

Well, I got a lot of... You go, look, this maniac up here. He goes, did you hear him? He said, hey, I'm wearing skinny jeans. I'm going on. That's why I'm moving out of stand-up. I'm moving into prop comedy. Golly.

I make a lot of observations. You're wearing camo pads. Yeah. Sometimes you accidentally show people stuff. Like your references. That's good. I don't think you would have done if you really would have known what was going on.

This guy's wearing moisturizer. There's no way he would wear that in April. What? Oh, no, you guys didn't think? Okay, never mind, never mind. No, they didn't notice the most friends. No, no, never mind. Okay, that's fine. It's fine. It's fine. Yeah. Oh, boy, look at this. It's our old friends. Delete me. Delete me makes it easy, quick, and safe to remove your personal data online at a time when surveillance and data breaches are common enough to make everyone vulnerable, including you, Brian. You're the most vulnerable. With Delete Me, you can protect your personal privacy or the, the privacy of your business from doxing attacks before sensitive information can be exploited.

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when you go to join deleteme.com slash Nate and use promo code Nate at checkout. The only way to get 20% off is to go to join deleteme.com slash Nate and enter code Nate at checkout. That's join delete me.com slash Nate. Graham Esling, I'm 11 years old and recently started listening to the podcast with my mom

and enjoy tuning in each week. I also enjoy playing golf and started playing almost three years ago. Some of you guys also play. Do you have any tips or words of wisdom for a newer golfer? I wish Dusty was here for this one, but y'all go ahead and take it. Yeah, I mean, just have fun. Yeah, have fun. Graham, just play Brian Bates or Aaron anytime.

Yeah, both your confidence. Play fast. My advice is play fast. Yeah, for play fast, don't take your score super serious. There will be plenty of times to be super serious about golf. And don't hold people up. Yeah. Play fast is everything.

Yeah. You do that. Your play, it doesn't matter if you're good or bad. If you play fast, you play with anybody you ever want to play with in your whole life. Just kind of move it along. I would say that, do you ever, I think somebody told me one time you can tell how selfish a person is by how many times in 18 holes they touched the flagstick? You're like, you never attended it. If they never touch it, they're selfish.

Yeah, you're like, dude, you never like, hey, should I pull this? Yeah. Or like you never, like people hit their balls and you never helped another person. Right. I'd say when I play with those guys. Yeah. Well, the first time I played with Henry, he did it a joke where he was like, yeah, did you feel the, what was the joke you been here? I said, yeah, how much that weighs?

Yeah, exactly. I have no idea. Because I didn't know you were supposed to grab it for other people. Yeah, you just feel how much that ways. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that's a better way. This is what it weighs. This is what it weighs.

Yeah. Never helped. look, sometimes you go help look for a, like, you know, I know this ball's in the water, but I'm going to go over here and act the way, help you look for the phone, humor than a little bit. Those guys are always, I like playing with those kind of guys. I'll look to a point. Like, if you hit your ball in the weeds and, you know, it is cut for like, you know, six inches a foot to three. I'll go to the edge of the foot.

And look, I ain't going in there for it. Now, I'm famously banned from inviting guests to play with Nate. because he said my guests are not good. Yeah. And do you still dress like Tiger when you play? No, no, no, no, no, no, we're not talking about that. Only on Sunday at a guest. Yeah, I got a call about that.

Where were you? You were there and you're going to go play someplace and the director of golf called me. Yeah. I actually texted and goes, do you know John, Chris? I go, is he wearing Tiger Red? Yeah. Anyway.

Depends on if it was Sunday. Goes out, she'd a hot. hot 87. You didn't do face paint or anything, did you? No, I should have. Okay. Yeah, should have. John Brocato.

I grew up in Huntsville, Alabama, but moved to Los Angeles with my band after college. Having grown up in the South, I had never experienced an earthquake before you getting to Southern California and living through two big ones, the Landers Quake of 1992 and the North Ridge Quake of 94. These were the two scariest moments. of my life, even after experiencing countless tornadoes and hurricanes as a kid. A couple weeks ago, we talked about weather, and Nate said earthquake was the scariest thing. Yeah, I was there for the North Ridge. It was crazy. 4.30 in the morning? Yeah. I think it fills the most out of control. There's nowhere to go.

Nowhere to go, and you don't know it's coming. I mean, that thing threw me completely across the room. Really? Yeah. And I used to joke about it, you know, after everything, you know, people lived and everything was stable. But, yeah, because the joke was, because I, when I was single, I slept with no clothes on. Yeah. So I was single at the time. And I, you know, everything's shaking. I grabbed some sweats and I was running out and I looked at them.

I was going, please be the bottoms. You also said it helped you because you were bowling. No, that was the first earthquake. First earthquake I ever had in Los Angeles wasn't bad because it helped. me because I was actually, I was bowling. It was at exactly 4.30 a.m. 4.30 a.m. That's crazy. You remember the exact time?

Dude, you get slammed, throwing out of bed up against the wall. 4.30 a.m. And my clock was destroyed, and it was stuck on 4.30. Yeah, 9,000 people injured property damage up to $50 billion. Yeah. Wow. And I told jokes about it that night. Was that not the, which one was on the World Series?

That was 89. Yeah. Here's the other thing. I was, my buddies were at the game at Candleston. And I was supposed to make that game, and my plane got delayed. So I just jumped on another one. I went, I forget, I'll just go home. So I went to L.A.

Yeah. And my buddies, this was back in the day of answer machines. And it was Carlos Osrocki and Rick Clay. Carlos still does comic. He was Reno 9-1-1, a guy like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they left a message from payphone. They said, hey, you big loser, you're not making the game.

Are you kidding? Why did you go home? Hey, whoa, hey. And it was like three hours later. So I went, what was that? I flip it on. There's Mark McGuire in the middle of the infield with his kids. And I was going, holy crap. So I turned it on, saw what happened. It took three hours before they could get back in touch with me. I didn't know what happened to him. Wow. Yeah. And I was like going, wow. Thank you, Lord. Yeah, yeah. That's crazy. Yeah, if you still had that S-machine recording Yeah That'd be a good one Yeah Do you think the earthquakes are upset That they don't get names like tornadoes

No, we just don't North Ridge Those aren't names It's because you don't you can't predict them You can't say hey the next No hurricanes Hurricanes got the names Yeah

Yeah not tornado sorry I messed that up Yeah I think the hurricane This is just a location Earthquake It's just location in the date Earthquake Abigail Yeah, earthquake, batsy.

And you go, oh, man, this will be a big one. I see stuff that's insulting. But you're right. So the earthquakes are you bound through, right? I think it's crazy because there's nowhere you can, when you're in it, it's not like you can go run five feet and it's not shaking. That's what the part. I know tornadoes and stuff, I think it's, yes, if you were in them, it would be insane.

But at least you feel like I see it and I can at least try to. I can move. Earthquake, there's nowhere to go. It was the most helpless feeling I've ever had in my life. Oh, yeah. I'll never get one of the first or second ones. I've been in L.A. just a few weeks, and we're in this restaurant, and there was a tremor, and I mean, it shook the table.

The glasses were everything. And I ran and stood in the doorway and no one else even flinch. I was the only one because everybody else was just, what are you doing? I go, dude, it's earthquake. That's nothing. And I'm over there like this. What? I mean, it's wild.

You don't just run out to like a field or something? No. In L.A. I don't know what you did. No. Where do you're supposed to get in the doorway, man? What are you supposed to do? Supposed to get in a doorway.

Yeah. Really? That's a strongest part of the room. Yeah. I guess if you're outside, you just, that's the thing. There's nothing really to do. But just hope it doesn't break on you. And hope it stops.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's so much moving. It's crazy. We were in New York City I talked about on this but we lived in New York when New York happened I mean imagine all of Manhattan

every building that's the biggest building on earth are all just going like this That's crazy That's the most out of like you're like I hope this all works out Like I mean it's unbelievable Yeah you know it helpless Helpless feel yeah

We've all been there You get blood work done You wait a week and the doctor says Everything looks fine Maybe they tell you to drink more water, get some exercise, but there's no breakdown of your hormones, no insight into inflammation, toxins or nutrient deficiencies, just vague advice and a quick send-off. Plattitudes. Yeah. Superpower is a completely different experience.

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how you heard about them and please make sure to mention this podcast to support the show your biology decoded, your blueprint activated with superpower. All right, we can get back, get in the... Henry, last week, John was on. He just got home from fantasy cowboy camp.

That's not how you say that. I was on a ranch. Cowboy... I was on a ranch contributing. You were a fantasy cowboy. Yeah, he was larping as a cowboy in the third round. Wait, wait, you went on to a cowboy? I went to a ranch for a couple.

Basically, any meat that you guys are consuming you know, this week or next, just you're what we I kind of That was you Yeah I don't want to make a big deal of it But so wait Okay So you did the fantasy ranch

No I just did some You know Was it like city slickers That's what everybody said in the comments But yeah No we just had to do some cattle driving And stuff like that That's fine

Yeah get them down to the You ride Yeah I was riding on a horse Good for you You can go up to the And you can Get the cows to do What you want to do

You got to bite them and stuff I don't have to make the horse bite them Right To get them to get them Yeah you got to bite them in that back the horse bites them the horse bites the ones that are going the slowest you bite the horse and the horse bites the cat

yeah it's wild yeah that makes so how many how many uh wrestlers were there uh like nine and I think there's two guides and I'm pretty sure the guides could have they could have done it without without us yeah we were part of the I don't know if I was being driven or if I was doing the driving

and so you did this on purpose yeah you had it was like a thousand dollars or something you wanted to see what some real blue collar work was yeah i'm a comedian got your hands dirty and so he went yeah did you wear skinny jeans no not for that yeah you got to wear some wranglers for that next week he's going to hotel that let you clean your own room it's really it's very expensive it's an immersive experience it's a mercy you have to do it yourself what's this life until you say i don't want to do it even yeah and then you used to have cattle yes i still have probably a handful right now black angus

and uh that's the true sign of of rich the bull yeah have Even your own cows? The big, well, no, shut up. The bull we had was the biggest animal I've ever seen. And my ranch hand was like curly and city slickers down in Alabama. Jackson named this bull marshmallow. He was three years old. That's where you named that bull.

Jackson goes marshmallow. That's a good name. So my ranch hand, I go, hey, how the cow is doing? He goes, 1137 is doing pretty good. I go, that's not his name anymore. What's his name? whole guy had to go marshmallow he hated me mad he hated me well that would be when do you think the era of like doing things for like fun like we paid to do them like camping people used that's how

people live they pay that you do that now yeah when did that when did these type of thing start oh you're saying one of these activities they became activities like you know like uh you know that like the adventure races where you like crawl through the mud and like do the like the warrior dash and you're like crawl over and like this sounds like we don't have any challenges left like that I'm cattle driving I paid to cattle drive yeah I was like this is that shows you have a lot of money no I think no I just says the country not me I just say yeah I'm trying oh let's go work on like a ranch for yeah it'll be fun the guy that actually works on the ranch like I hate this son pulls up behind uh people I have flat tires let me help you just so he goes let me do it

I just want to feel what it feels like. I have fantasized about that, honestly. I'm being honest. I got a dude's hang around Bates. Yeah. He's had two flat tires around me. I mean, right out of the gate, right when I first met him. I don't think I'd been on the road with him yet.

The first one. It was on the North Carolina. Well, the first one, I think, was it's a comedy catch, wasn't it? No, that was the second one. Okay. Yeah, that's when he joined AAA. Oh, yeah. Right there on the spot.

Yeah. You can't tell me. Go ahead. You never saw someone. cutting grass. And you're like, let me get on that thing. No, not cutting grass. No, because I've done it.

Oh, I see that all the time. But also, I'm only looking at the fun part of it. Like, you're not thinking about the reality of the job and that it is hard work. Oh, you're saying watching them cut grass, I think I want to do it. Yeah, let me get on that thing. It would be therapeutic. I work so you've never done it. Yeah, I've done lawn.

I worked. I did cutting grass like in when I was like right out of high school. Yeah. It's a brutal. Yeah. Brutal. Now, yeah, in your, you know, your mansion you have. Yeah, it's probably a pretty good time. You go sit on your little thing. Zero turn. Yeah, it sounds fun. Right. Yes, that is, would be very, people do think it's very therapeutic to cut their yards. Yeah. I do understand that. Yeah.

But I mean, the actual, like, being out in it. That's what I mean, the reality of it is. You ever seen those TikTok videos of the pressure washing? Yeah, I watch me all the time. I have a video game where I pressure wash. pressure washing video you guys not own a pressure washer do you all really not own a pressure washer I play it's a pressure washing simulator don't include me in this I play on Xbox that's insane what do you

are you serious John's pulling away from it I'm out of this I'm out of this I'm out of this man John I got your back dude jump in on it oh my words look at that it's a pressure washing simulator man that's no why not and then you just and you complete jobs and you get more money and then you can buy new nozzles oh wow that's like redneck

Minecraft right there. Oh, I want to pressure wash that house. Dude, that looks sweet. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Don't you just... Hey, I have a... The ones you go doing in real life.

I have 61 steps and a deck you guys can pressure wash at the lake. I'd be happy to do. I'll be doing that in about nine days. See, this is what I mean, though. This is the fun part of pressure washing. This looks awesome. Lugging the thing to the house and getting the water and getting the gas and all of that. That's the not fun part, but you just want to clean some stuff.

Okay, I'll have it all ready. All you got to do is pull the trigger. Yeah. And go down the steps. I was playing this game. I've only maybe played this game, like an hour. Well, one minute's long enough. Look, Nate can't stop looking at it.

I don't know if I think this would be. I was like halfway through a backyard and I was like... It's like coloring. I was starting to feel like I do it a real job where I was like, man, this stinks, but I just got to finish it. And then I was like, I don't have to do it. I could just leave. Look at that, dude. This guy's killing it.

And then he went to your nap game. I got farming simulator and then there's a couple of, couple grass cutting. Okay, when, again, when, I don't know if this, the answer is if this is on the internet, but when do you think the first person camped? Oh, that's like a recreational activity. For the whole, the whole of human history, people were camping to live. You mean, yeah.

Like, let's go for the weekend. It's borderline impossible to stay in the woods. Yes. Yeah, like it's, it's, whoever had the first house. Yeah, yeah. Let's go stay outside. Exactly. Whoever had the first house.

Yep. They found like, hey, let's sleep outside. I mean, the real losers, really. When cars were invented were the horses, they were like, did we used to run? And now people ride them for, not for work. Yeah, they just ride them for fun. They got to be like, dude, we...

Yeah, but how do you know? I mean, maybe the horse was like, I'm sick of working. This is great. I got guys coming trying to be cowboys. Yeah, maybe they're... I just got a buy a cow every once in a while. They got a guy like me coming on there.

Like, did we hate this guy? Yeah. Yeah, they hated me for sure. Yeah. It's in, I mean, I can't believe you have this game. I can't believe you're still playing it. Yeah. I'm not playing it.

I'm watching a guy who's really... I can't believe it's still on. I'm watching a guy who's good player. How many people have watched this video? 273,000. 273,000 views. So let me ask you this, Aaron. Do you get penalized if you go too deep and, like, cut into the wood?

Not so far in the game. Okay. Because in real life, that is something that can happen. 100%. Yeah. And I pressure wash in real life, too. That's why I like it. This is...

But, like, when you start out in the game... I've done a lot of things in real life that I don't play games. I don't find them on the internet. I will say, you guys are not going to believe this story, and this does not break any confidentiality, but I was in rehab in 2019, and a guy was in there. I believe that.

Addicted to video games. Yeah. He played MLB, the show. I get it. He was in the MLB. I'm dead serious. He was in the, he would, so he would every,

every city. He was an active player? He was an active player. I can't say with team. And no, no, you have to. He's active player and then he got addicted to the video game. He was in rehab for it. He would go to, so he, every city, you go to four game and a road trip, he would go, he would go get to the city, swear off of it. Of course, he'd go to Walmart, buy a TV and an Xbox, play, stay up three nights in a row, he's on the road, play and then. Oh, so he was a pitcher. He was a relief pitcher. Yeah, he had to be. closer to have his guy on that. He's up. You're like, what city?

Yeah. And then he would swear off of it, leave it. What city did not travel to it? That's what I'm saying. It's like in real life you don't want to do it. But like he was... Was he better at the game than he was in real life? Yeah, but he was in the pros.

That's the top. How do you be addicted to... Like, I mean, I understand being addicted to it. How do you get addicted to a sport you play? Yeah. I mean, you're a, you're in a 1%. And, I mean, like, I could see like going, yeah, this is a problem. But, but there's the rehab.

Because you start to do it at the expense of other things. Like, take care of yourself. You don't think people can be addicted to that? Yeah, you're 100%. People wouldn't be addicted to anything. It could destroy people's lives. I'm addicted to Powerwashing now. Yeah, yeah.

Now, PowerW, if you were like, hey, what game are you in? You're like, M.O. be the show. You're like, all right, well, if you were in for this, I mean, all right, guys. Yeah. I used to play World of Warcraft. When I was 16, I played every day with a guy from Canada who got hit by a bus and collected disability from the government and he played World of Warcraft 24.

He would literally just sit and play all day. That was his whole life. But he was disabled. He was disabled. He wasn't playing in the major leagues. But you can turn off the game and read a book and live with a filling life. This is all he did was play this game. And we would get on at night and go, how's everybody's day?

And people would go, work was good. He would go, yeah, you know, I've been. He would just talk about the game, because that was his life, was the whole game. And you do, like, your reality is not great. But on there, you're killing it. He turns off the game, and he's a horrible. He's a, yeah, horrible. Canadian guy with one leg.

No shot to Canadians, but he's. But you're a God in the game. He's disabled. That's what addiction is. Like, I think it's like, yes, but you're picking, like, an athlete. Yeah. That's a once-in-a-generation athlete that makes his a pros. Well, this guy was really good at the game.

Well, yeah, you don't need your leg. Your guy was good at the game? Yeah, he was the main tank. Play 24 hours a day. He was the main tank of the guilt. He was pretty good. Yeah, I don't know what that means. The main tank of the deal.

Be glad you don't know what that means. I don't know what that. I don't need. Video games never, never got me. How do I get into it? You don't, there's too, it's too, you got too much going on. You're about to get married. Productive life.

I started playing PGA. sometimes on my bus but I only do it on my bus but it doesn't get you going you know what it does I can kind of if I need to think about some stuff I can kind of zone out

that helps you that way that's what this is that's what this is that's what this is yeah but I'm playing PGA and you're doing power washing that looks like I don't I just don't like it's crazy to me

some of those games like World of Warcraft you had to if you wanted to get anything done you had to play four or five hours at once. Yeah. And I wanted something... Or in reality, get nothing done for four and a half hours. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

I agree with it. Okay. I agree with it. I had just moved to Tennessee. I didn't have any friends. This is what I was doing. Now you got to go to life. But you had to invest time to play that game correctly.

You had to put in four or five hours. That's what you're saying? To get anything done. I would play 10 or 12 hours on a day on the weekend sometimes for a while. Were your parents ever concerned? probably yeah that's a lot of it probably but i just moved to a new city i was going to football workouts in the morning i would come home and i would get on there and get on there and play that yeah that's like i think if you're going to pick up something advice wise this is the one

yeah i think so if you had to pick i've seen i do think about that sometimes if i wish i could get addicted to something that's like working out yeah because people get obsessed with it yes they do you're like i wish i could get obsessed with that So you know what you need to do? You've got to get addicted to something bad and then go to rehab and then replace it with whatever. Oh, yeah. That's what, I mean, every executive in Los Angeles. Mine is, I don't really like it.

Oh, really? That's what it is. Yeah, they replaced that addiction with something else. I mean, that's every manager, agent, low rung, whatever, non-successful, they've all been through rehab and they'll tell you that, you know, this is the greatest. And, okay, how long you've been doing it? well, I got out of rehab. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Okay. Okay. Yeah. Back riding's great. We got the expert here. Sounds familiar. Oh, right here. That's why he's riding horses.

Yeah. That was, yeah. Yeah, so we started talking about cowboy attire. And I only think we got to was chaps. And then John said he opened for a dance review guys and chaps. And we kind of got off course here. Well, we got off course now. Yeah.

Yeah. Back on the course. What's the topic? Cowboys. We're back. We're back. We're just going to finish up a little bit. I play Red Dead Renemption, too.

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$900, so I don't think that's what the Cowboys had in mind. What is the function of a cowboy hat? because now I just anyone I see wearing it now they're choosing for style reasons most people like what's the function of it there you go son I cowboy hats so I have several and uh oh yeah I wear them different times when I'm doing different things but it's always when I'm outside doing stuff and it's about weather son I mean I have one if it's raining I wear a cowboy hat because it's on the back you know sure yeah the brim's on the back yeah so it protects me but it's no different than like a bucket hat or something like that they could also But you know what?

I've never had girls look at me like they look at me in a cowboy hat. In a bucket hat, yeah. There's a different. It is stopped. The original cowboy hat was for sun protection and you could dip water. Yeah, that's right. Oh. And drink from it or drink for the horses.

Or let your horses. Yep. Whiskey for my man. Yep. Did you, uh, did y'all try lassoing? We had it on hand if we would have needed it. But, uh. But did you try it?

No, I never tried it. It's, yeah. It's hard. Yeah, lasso while riding. Yeah. Have you tried it? Yeah, just, I've never been able to do it, but I've been around. To me, it's almost like a yo-yo where you've got to know the right hand motions to do it or it just doesn't.

You have to have the correct rope, too. I mean, you didn't have just like a rope, right? No, it was a real lasso. Okay, they have lasso ropes, right? Which are very rigid. Yeah. So that loop stays. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. We didn't. The main wrangler, though, he did have a lasso on his horse in case something went awry. I've let them in the wrong direction or something like that. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Do you have spurs?

No, we didn't have spurs. We could kick them, though. We could kick the horses to get them to go. No spurs. But horses, you got to like... What do spurs? What does spurs do? Get the horse to go more.

So it just hurts them a little more? Yeah, just a little bit sharper. Okay. It's hard. You got to kick a horse. I was just, I mean, Harper loves horses. I rode with her a couple weeks ago. So it's not just like a little tap.

You got a real. I mean, even for me, I would see her have struggling, and you're like, all right, well, she's little and whatever, but when I wrote it, it's like, I mean, I even got to kick it harder than you think. Okay. Yeah. They're big palper animals.

Cowboy boots were designed the way they were. The high tops to protect the leg from snakes or shrubs or whatever. And then the point was to get in the stirrup. Yep. Easier. And then the hill is to stay on the back of the stir. That's right. Yep.

Oh. All right. then rodeos became guys got so good at doing calf roping stuff like that that they started having competitions to see who was the best at it

1883 two guys got an argument and one one was a roper the other one was a cattle driver and they did a contest that was the first ever rodeo where was it? Frontier town of Pecos Texas okay oh fighting a scene

Who could stay on the bull the longest? They didn't do bull running the first thing, but they were doing another thing. But that was like the first demonstration. Wow. That's crazy. And now rodeo. You ever been a rodeo? I have many rodeos, actually.

Have you done a show for one? I did. Yes. Yeah. And we were in the dirt. I did one too. Have you done one? Yeah.

I don't think I have. Yeah. You've done one? Yeah. Were you with me? I was in Raleigh. Springfield, Missouri. No, that's you.

I did Springfield, Missouri with you. It was like the Rock and Ribs. festival or something and it was in it was on dirt it was on the dirt that's right so we were in a rodeo rink that's right yeah that's where we were yep i remember that yeah there's a family that kind of dominate the rodeo circuit subtle sidel brach portion of it the right family out of Utah and there's like seven boys and they all just win championships for what lassoing a roping or what uh bronc rotting oh oh yeah got you got right in the horses yeah yeah and then the all-time best rodeo cowboy is Trevor Brazil

he's won 23 world championships how old is he I think I know that guy I think Trevor's the one who got his face he went down and the bull came up and got his face oh man you know they wear helmets now they wear helmets they were face masks I mean yeah how do they agree where does the bull come from

it's like a neutral bull yeah it's kind of so the bull I was talking about marshmallow was so big And, I mean, he was crazy. He busted down a fence and went and did his bull thing with a bunch of cows. So I got a bunch of calves for free, all that kind of stuff. I wouldn't allow it. I was in charge.

They wanted him some rodeos, you know, local smaller Louisiana and stuff. They wanted him as a rodeo bull, but I wouldn't sell it to him for that. So like if I'm a cowboy, I want to compete in a rodeo, I show up. They already have a bull there. Yes. It's not a bull that I have a relationship with in anyone. No, no, no. It's a random draw.

And it's a random draw, and they're all using the same bull? No, no, no, no. No, that's why you don't, there are different bulls that are harder to rather than others. So you're just the luck of the draw. So the pro, like when it's the championship, they, you don't know what bull you're doing. And you get judged, though, on the bull as well. Do they take into account the difficulty level of the bull? Yes.

Oh, okay. And it's just a group of people neutral that just assess how crazy that one is. Anything's judged. You have judges. Yeah, it's subjective at some level. Maybe it's the, like, yeah, that was not that hard. That bull didn't care that much. That bull was pretty cool with you.

Yeah. But that's how I got started. They used to have to break these horses. And then some guys were better at it than others by staying on. And then they started having competitions to see who could do it the best. And it's another way that rode out. And then the bulls, they were like, let's try it with a bull now. Yeah.

Do you know why they get so mad? Why? Why they buck like that? Why? You don't know? No. They cinch them. Their testicles.

They cinch them. Right before they go out? Right before. Yeah. That's why they're going nuts. What? I didn't know. I thought they...

Am I wrong? Is that I mean? Like, Ty? Like, they like... Snap? They cut them off? No, no, no. No, they like squeeze them.

They're grabbed. Oh. Yeah. Is that correct? Who's doing that? Somebody from a competitor? No, no, no. I think there's a strap.

And they just pull it and then they want to just go nuts. I thought they were just let loose and they were just let loose and they're they were just going. I did too. As soon as they fall off, they pull the thing and then it loosens them up and then they relax. Wow. You didn't know that? No, I had no idea. Proud to have some information. Yeah, I like that. Although you did know that information. I wasn't going to be the first guy to say it. You're fine. That's why they, that's what they buckling. I think when they put them in the thing, they're not, they're calm. They're not calm. They know what's coming. And they, they, they, they, as soon as they, they've done it before,

they know what's coming. And then they go nuts. I mean, imagine if you knew what was coming. Yeah, I'd be pretty upset. You'd be in that stall going, I really, you better not pull that. That's why that, yeah, that's why they, uh, people, people like something, you kind of go. Can you get an airing off of you? Yeah. You just trying to, like, see world and you're like, I don't, if, if you're, if these animals aren't being treated well, we don't need this entertainment. I think that's what a lot of rodeos are going, hey, we shouldn't, we shouldn't be doing this

for these animals. I think it's what a lot of people recently have said. I think a lot of people now it's Matadors. That's the, the bull fighting people, people, people don't like anymore. But on the rodeo, they're not hurting the bulls. No, they're fine. They're bulls. Yeah, they don't, I mean, Peter didn't like it. Yeah.

I can't remember the, oh, gosh, this was some San Francisco comic in the early 90s. He used to do, Matador. He goes, yeah, the bull comes up, Matador puts a sword in him. Yeah, I'm smarter than a bull. I'm outwitted, a dumb animal. Yeah, so the Madador, they kill that bull. Yes. I think they're stabbing it with a sword.

Yeah, yeah. And the running of the bulls is that's just like a, like a, and they just open the gates and everybody just runs. Yeah, now those bulls are just running. They're not tied or anything. People are getting, they're just running through the streets and it's blocked off. Would you ever go do that? My buddy Cortland did it this year.

And he was like, he said it was the wildest thing he's there. He's like, there's no, yeah, they run through that. That's great. The bulls run through that. Yep. What did he do when he went through it? I mean, there's like they, now. That's where I'd be.

Everybody wears the same outfit And they don't let And everybody do it now It used to because people Too many people live just Yeah it's not usually that packed When they start out But people got

Get hurt That's 223 oh yeah But it's like a rush If you're gonna get addicted to something Dude what do you addicted to? So they're about to open that And let the Bulls run to that crowd Find a better video of it

Yeah There you go How long's the run? That's absurd Gosh That one looks like it waited for people Yeah He'd figure it out

I don't have to go anywhere. Yeah, they shoot, and then they open it, and they all run down the street. Is that all the guys right there? That's insane to me, dude. Look at that. No shot. I would, yeah, I mean, I would be like, I could see maybe running up for a second then I would get against the wall.

Like, I would do it enough to be like I did it. Yeah. And then, but I mean, guys are. Do you know how far the run is? Is it like a, I don't know. It's not like a half marathon or something, right? It's a 5K? 13-5-5-5-5-0.

But I think once the bulls are past you, the rush is over, so you want to stay out in front of them. But if you go to the side, you're in essence giving up. Yeah, but then you're okay. That right there, you're touching it. That's crazy, dude. Yeah. It was crazy.

Yeah. I want to go do it. Next year, Nate, you want to get you going to do it? Y'all do that and film it. Oh, and they run it. Oh, it's an average of two to three minutes. I could do that. I was worried more about just the run.

Just having to run somewhere in a whole way. That's the average. Some people run like five seconds. Depends on who you are. There isn't over under. It would be, yeah, where do you got to go? Like, I mean, man, it would be just, I wouldn't do that. I'd be afraid they'd all get past me and then I turn around to air and would just pull over me.

I would think you could get up. Like, I think, you know, I would like to think you're athletically enough not to get right. I can, like, figure it out. Yeah, rodeo clowns. They have to, I mean, risk their life sometimes to situations. Man, that is, uh... Oh, Jim did it.

Yeah. No, he did a joke on it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's a little different. It's a little different. It's a little different. Yeah. But this is the same as, this is the same as, uh, video games.

or gambling or any type of you're like you get addicted to like adrenaline you're like this is unbelievable yeah i mean that's only once a year that are in the thick of it just running straight in front of them is insane now this guy is living that guy in the red shirt is the best day of his life this is the best day of his life i promise and the shortest yeah might be sure yeah potential there's no high or high than yeah when people are running with the bulls i mean it's uh oh there's more imagine if yeah yeah yeah there's more Imagine if you're a wife with three kids and your husband goes, I think I'm going to go.

Oh, yeah. I think I'm going to go with Bulls this. Look at that, dude. I think I'm going with the Bulls this year. Dude, what? Well, yeah. Well, you're going to have a wife with no kids who's going to go. Yeah, with anybody.

I think the same thing of that as a guy that's like, I'm going to go hike up Mount Everest or something. You know, the same thing. You could also not do this. Yeah, we're not supposed to be up there. Oh, well, they want to do. Everest. Or even like the more dangerous ones. Everest is really not that dangerous.

Well, I feel like if that person is like, yeah, that person's a person that does that kind of stuff. Yeah, it's thrill chasing. Yeah, and so skydiving. But at least Everest is there. We create this. That's true. This whole scenario.

Well, you got to get them over there. That's a lot. Yeah, you got to get them. You could do it with the empty street. Yeah, it's tough to clear out of street. It's tough to clear out of street. But the why, like if you go on a roller coaster, what's the thrill of it? You're like, we might die, but you're not going to die.

It's like, yeah, you're so close to like potential harm. Yeah. That's why it's fun. I was telling Nate, so my Lucy, my wife, her grandfather was in a club called like the roller coaster enthusiasts of America. Yeah. Where they would just go if a new roller coaster opened up, they would just go and just test it.

Yeah. They just loved it. See, that doesn't do the thrill at me. That doesn't do anything. There's nothing for me. I don't even. I don't like it. I have no desire to do that.

Yeah, it's, yeah, I think it's like, ah, like, man, we rolled one in Universal, or in Epic. It was crazy. Epcon? What? You say you rolled one? Roared one. Road, I don't know, I said, rode one. We rode one.

And it was in Epic, the new Universal, and it was, I mean, it's intense. It was like, yeah, I think we talked about it on here, right? Like, it was, I mean, it was, yeah, that stuff's intense. Yeah. Well, that's like kind of, it's not a secret, I guess, but you watch NASCAR. Like, what's so exciting about this? That guy could die. He's going to 200.

You're thinking that. I don't think anybody is watching it for. That can happen. But you seem to be the only one that is rooting for death. He's not rooting for it. You're like, look at the chances. It could be. I don't think if any of the NASCAR drivers,

we'd like to talk to John before the race when he goes, man, it's crazy. He'll come out there's a car. I know. One of you could die. Isn't that running of the bulls though? Did you have that logo on that car? What?

On your NASCAR? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, you did. The hair logo. That was the last episode. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. I did have that on the, yeah. A dude ranch is a ranch for tourism and visitors that want to pretend to be cowboys. Mind it. That's not where I was. Ritalin used to have a dude ranch. Oh, yeah.

Did you really? Out in Waverly? Mm-hmm. Wow. Drugstore Cowboys are guys who wear the clothes but don't actually do anything, but sit on the stool of a drugstore sort of found in place. Oh, really? Yeah.

It's called Drugstore Cowboys. Never heard of it. They also say, all hat and no cattle. Same thing is to scrap somebody that dresses the dress but doesn't do anything. Yeah. And probably a bunch of words you can't say on the full. podcast they used to call it yeah yeah we quoted a couple of your jokes last week really about stolen that was how that works yeah about playing uh cowboys and indians and oh yeah that's

wow that's 1986 my first joke oh yeah that you were the cook that's right yeah you played army yeah yeah neighborhood against me you know it's crazy thing my buddy's got interviewed early in my career And they go, yeah, that cook, do you all make Henry Henry be the cook? They go, no, man, that's a joke. Yeah, right, yeah, it never happened. We played bananas and he was little Joe. Yeah, yeah, I was little Joe. I don't hop sing, get out of it.

Hop sing is my dad. Some famous cowboys, Billy the Kid, Jesse James. Are they cowboys? Not really. Yeah, I was going to say. Yeah. Wyatt Earp. No, these are really.

Yeah, who's a famous cowboy, dude? John Wayne. Gene Otry. Billy the kid? Troy Aikman. Okay. There you go. Michael Urban.

Yeah. Oh, but they had the, you go out in the middle of the street and you try to shoot each other, right? Yeah. A duel. Is that real? They would be cowboy. Like, I don't know that be a cowboy. Not really.

They just, they're outlaws. Yeah, they're outlaws that rode the transportation that was available. I think the line's been blurred between that. I think we're all talking about the same. same thing, though. I think if John, was John Wayne, could he be a legit, he was probably legit doing it? I think John Wayne, yeah, he probably did all that riding in. Yeah. I mean, he wasn't four packs a day. Yeah, he did four, how many Westerns did he do? Oh, gosh. A hundred or something? Yeah, he was in all of them. Why are West, you know,

it's funny, I never got into Westerns. Me neither. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Do you watch, do you guys, Django unchanged? Like Django Unchanged? You ever see that? No. That's probably not the first one to interview. Watch, that's how long intro. Yeah. Some Clint Eastwood.

No, I'm just thinking of... It's the world. I don't know if it's the world I never got into. Like, I don't, it doesn't, like, I have a fantasy, like Game of Thrones and that kind of stuff.

That world doesn't, I know, does it interest me where I can stay? But Westerns are the one that, like, it's the people made it the most and people love them, and I for some reason, I'm just like,

because, and it's not a made-up world. Yes. It was how this country was. Yeah. What about Lord of the Rings? You do that or no? No. Nothing.

You can't immerse yourself. Harry Potter? I can't immerse myself with something. You can't go in here. You get lost in a good book or something like that. A good book? Have you ever met him? Yeah.

I can get lost in my own. Yeah, in my own. In my own world. Well, I'm thinking, yeah. I can get lost in my act or something like that. Yeah. But I don't know if I can get lost in. Yeah, that's world building.

A movie's hard. world building in your own way. I don't watch movies. Silverado. That's a good Western to watch. Buffalo Bill Cody started a traveling show that kind of, a lot of the stereotypes we have

Cowboys kind of started with his Wild West show. And he would bring along Andy Oakley. He could shoot a sharpshooter. Oh, yeah, Andy. Annie. That was her. Yeah, his sister. Andy's sister.

Andy Oakley. They're related. They're related. Did you know who Annie Oakley was? Yeah, yeah. Annie gets your gun? I didn't. Oh, that's what it's from?

Yeah. I didn't know. You don't know anything about Westerns. I don't. It's fine. This is history. This is a Westerns. I'm trying to help.

I watch every history movie I watch is on the edge of my seat. That's right. That's why I'm saying. What happened? Gunfight at the OK Corral? Yeah. What? Teamstone.

Okay. But what era of the United States was this? Turn of the century. Yeah. Before I don't know. Yeah, like around the 1900s, right around. And so the 19... Mostly 1800s, late 1800s.

In the 1960s and 70s was when they were popular. A lot of them, yeah. They don't make them anymore. Finanza and gun smoke. Gun smoke. But what if it's an age thing? Because if you're...

Western, you would have heard older stories about your people being growing up on horses and riding horses versus when do you start getting less and less and less. Yeah. Like, because you're...

I don't know. What do you think the... Butch Cass then that's good. Paul Newman, Robert Rifford. Watch that one. But they make these new worlds now like Avatar. But I think there was an era where the archetype of like an alpha American man was a cowboy. You're right.

That's what it was. John Wayne. And I don't know if that's what it. I don't think it's that anymore. I don't know what it is. Astronauts another one. That was like the archetype of that. And then that's, but I don't know what it is for like guys closer to our age.

Like what is the. An athlete? TikTok star. It must be. It must be. Must be like a, yeah, top gun. I mean, you know, fighter pilots. Yeah, there's some military stuff too.

Pressure washer. Yeah. It's going to be the next movie. The pressure wash kid comes up in the minor leagues. So Wild Bill Hickok was an outlaw and he got invited to be part of this Wild West traveling show. But he didn't enjoy acting. He would often hide behind the scenery. and in one show they put the spotlight on him

and he pulled out his gun and shot out the spotlight so they asked him to stop coming I thought they only had one light yeah so they had to stop right yeah I mean I would almost be like yeah it's pretty good did the people knew who he was

yeah so he was so yeah I would be like that's not a good promoter yeah do it every one shoot more stuff dude you know what do the like that's the only one we're talking about I don't know how back then how famous anybody was because, I mean, news just didn't travel like it does now.

I bet they were famous in whatever area. But could mail travel? They had the dime novels. Could mail travel at all? Yeah, what was that? It's a book that would cost a dime. And they wrote stories about Billy the Kid and Doc Holliday and White Earp and all those. They were called dime novels.

Do you have any Pony Express stuff on there? I don't, but we talked about that. I guess we did. On the previous episode. You know the stop? was up there in Gallatin. I did not know that. Yeah.

There's a Pony Express stop up in Gallatin. Sure is. Right off, what does that, be there on veterans? Yeah. Yeah. In Gallatin, it's up there out of the law, really? Yeah. Did you do it?

No, I didn't. I fed the horses. I fed the horses and I cooked for the writers. Those, I do remember, they were mainly, like, 13-year-old boys, and they had to weigh, like, no more than 100 pounds. And then they went, wow, we're going to make them jockeys. Yeah. And that's how it started.

Is it? Yep. But the Buffalo Bills are named after Buffalo Bill Cody. Wow. Wait, so he was... I didn't know that. Bad? He was an outlaw?

He was an Al-Wool. Well, Wild Bill Hickok was the album. Buffalo Bill Cody's the one that did the show, the Wild West show. And the Buffalo Bills were named after him. And he wear buffalo skin around. Yeah. Do you know where the Ravens are called the Ravens? Edgar Allan Poe.

Of course you knew. Is that true? Yeah. That was a guess. But yeah, because he's from Baltimore. Yeah. Yep. Never more, never more.

Wow. That's awesome. Yeah. I didn't know that until this weekend. I had a joke about it. They go, I go, why is the Ravens called the Ravens? And they told me, Edgar Allen Poe, and I go, that's not the joke.

And he goes, because of Edgar Allen Poe, I was like, oh, yeah, he's safety, right? no way very funny oh you thought it was perfect I didn't think anything I know I know I know that was very funny

yeah that's a nice little opening into Baltimore that's amazing and here we are yeah very good in between here

is about done with cowboys but I wouldn't just skip it yeah all right let me see if there anything else about cowboys the Dallas Cowboys

are the most valuable franchise in sports in sports have been for 20-something years. You think they would be even if like college, if you could buy and sell college programs in the same way? Yes.

No one's a college program. Yeah, college program is not even close. We're talking about billions. Notre Dame. Yeah, but I'm saying you think University of Tennessee is worth more than the Titans? No.

No. Not even close. The NFL is so big. Yeah. They're all buildings. You got to think of the University of Tennessee. Yeah, so are some of the high-level college program is like the market value of the athletic program. The NFL is just like international and everything, where you go University of Tennessee, there's an area you get outside of, and they're not going to know it.

If you got the biggest. I mean, you said Notre Dame, I guess, because it's like Ohio State versus the worst NFL team. Yeah. Carolina Panthers. Even like the Dolphins or something, I bet Ohio State's worth more. if you were to put the athletic program. I would say most people don't know about college, because most people don't watch college sports.

It's like up east, like in the northeast, like they don't watch college sports as much. And they watch Notre Dame probably, but it's they know about them, but they're not, it's not the NFL, it's not even close. No, NFL is, yeah, seven billion. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. Yeah.

Dolphins value around seven billion. See what? That's a bad example because they're the eighth most valuable NFL. team. I was trying to pick an out of like a small market. But what's

I know that's crazy. Here's what you have to understand. Dolphins taking shots. A college team may have

one all-American an NFL team has 22 playing. Right. But I'm talking about all the assets.

Merchandise. Every like everything. The TV deals everything. No. University of Texas. Like what's

the value of the University of Texas? You know, look it up and see? Well, we can't buy and sell these things, so they're not like on the market. And these aren't endowment. It's all speculative. We're not talking about endowments, so. Yeah, like the universe, athletic, not the facilities.

One point to. Yeah, that's the value of the athletic facilities. And that's one of the highest. Yeah, of like Texas is worth an estimated $2.38 billion per the athletic. Yeah, so not even close. Jeez. Well, the versus the dolphins, but what's, you know. You're in that.

You're in the ball. It's closer than you. What is the lowest value NFL team? Yeah. Yeah, I would say the Bengals have a valuation of $5.5 billion. Yeah, it's like not even close. All right. All right.

I see where you go. Trust me. I know I know $2.5 billion sounds like a lot, but it's not when there's $5.5 billion. Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if I believe these numbers.

Yeah. Well, you think it'd be more. You know what you should do? research tonight. I would think college is, you know, college is like a privileged thing, I think. Wait, what do you mean? I don't mean to be privileged, but it's like in the world, I think most people, majority can't be going to college. No, majority don't. No, it has nothing to do with this. But it has the value of it. The majority people can't play for the Bengals. They can know who the Bengals are. We can know who the university. Do you don't think people in Texas know

the University of Texas? No. But what, what value? would they like but you're only going to get those people in that thing like the NFL is uh you're just rooting for this team it's not you're invested into the school or whatever it is i guess everybody i'm saying for the value it's just you got to have fans to be the biggest value yeah well you're going to have more fans from a professional league that actually can go out and try to do that where college is like you know you get you get you get out outside of, I mean, we're talking about outside the country. If you get outside the country, then you're like, yeah, I don't think if you go to Europe, they're like the Texas Longhorns.

But they know, they go, they might know, they know Jacksonville Jaguars because they've played over there a few times, you know. Yeah. Yeah, those games, the NFL games are sold out in Europe. And I don't think, if you took away the United States fans that are traveling to see the college teams, it'd be a hard sell over there to watch a bunch of... Because Notre Dame plays over there, right? They just played a game in Ireland to start the season. Yeah, yeah. And it was there. Georgia Tech.

Go Jackets. That's right. We played there last year. Yeah. But if you took away the, their loyal fans who are going, NFL fans, I mean, that's the thing. You go to Europe and they show the games in Europe, the NFL, you'll see every team represented, Jersey-wise. Because they're just going to that CNF NFL game. They're not going to run.

Route 418. Yeah, yeah. So that's, I mean, that's the whole, that's the, how huge and global the NFL is over the university of whatever. Yeah, yeah. Makes sense. Well, Nate's right, because once, trust me, you get out of the SEC, no one cares that much.

They just don't, I mean, they have big following, but they, I mean, all state, obviously they have, Ohio State, Notre Dame, but for the most part, most part, you, yeah, yeah, they're not going to, they don't stop, their town does not shut down on Saturday. Yeah, I mean, yeah. Yeah, I don't think, you know, are that, just that town does, nothing outside of it. Right. Like, it's not, Notre Dame moves the needle more and Ohio State, like, but it's, it's very far and few between. All right. It's a dumb thing to bring up. So.

Thanks for running the podcast, Aaron. Yeah. A lot of people talking about the job. Cowboys. it's pretty much we're good right yeah uh all right i don't know where i'm hosting the emmys that's after this let's go wow this weekend this weekend that's that's that's that's big dude yeah way to go thank you i don't think it's this week no i think it's next weekend yeah oh next weekend but i won't be here for that podcast so the next time we'll see you you will have hosted the emys i will have hosted the emys how do you how do you feel about like right now. We're a couple weeks ahead. Do you feel like good about it? Yeah, I'm excited. We have more excitement than nerves and kind of just like, yeah,

you know, you don't want to blow it. I think I have a lot. You think doing like the Christmas show and all that is you feel better because you've done like a life. I feel much better knowing that I've done that kind of thing. I'm going to do me. And I think we have the right team around helping me. And we got a, you know, I think a great idea as an opening. And. And. another thing. We have a couple ideas that are pretty different that I think people will talk about. But I think it'll be what I do. And yeah, I'm excited. I'm excited to do it and then I'll be happy to be done with it. Yeah. Because it's, you just want it to be. Do you think you'll run any of the stuff at your shows at all? Or are you going to keep them separate in your mind?

Right now in my mind, I think I keep it separate. Like I don't know if I don't know if I'm going to have stuff like that. Because you're in Denver the night before, right? The two days before. Two days before, yes. Lincoln, Nebraska, Wichita, we had to, we had to, not cancel, we rescheduled. And I, you know, I want to apologize to them for that. But Denver was like, it was like too insane to get it moved. It would be too crazy. And then so it was like, yeah, I'll be doing rehearsals on Friday, flying to Denver, one show, two shows. Saturday, and then fly back, and then do... That means the next day.

Sunday, Sunday, do the Emmys. That's got to be up there with one of your craziest weekends. Yeah. But you've had some crazy ones. I've had some crazy ones. I remember here, some of them were like, geez, but this is up there. We had, yeah, the one was in Vegas. I did a show at Vegas that ended at 12.30 a.m.

And I had a 3 p.m. Boston Garden show. Yeah. Wow. That was a wild. That's one of the ones I was. I was thinking of it. That was a wild. Yeah.

But that was one that you're like... Birthday weekend. That was my birthday. Yeah. That was a... That was recent. Yeah. And that was like one that you're like...

No, not this Boston Garden. Okay. Last time I was there. Okay. But it was like one that you're like, all right. Like, I love it. Let's go do it. So this is going...

This is kind of that. Embrace the chaos of it. And I love the chaos. And I love it. And I, you know, I, you know, where... The reason I'm even able to host him is because of the road. So I don't... love having to reschedule some stuff.

But it's, I think this will be fun and whatever. And then, yeah, it'll be fun just to go. At least Denver's closer. Denver's closer. You can do it and then come right back and then host that night and then just be. Well, you're smart to just do you. That's all you got to do. Yeah.

You should do that Ravens joke. I might. You know, that is good. Bring that up. Yeah, bring that hearing in the crowd. Airground pole. Oh, man. Married his cousin.

He died, died in the, on a curve just on the street. On the curve, it was a tragic death. Same curb as Hemingway. Did he die the same? I thought Hemingway killed himself. Yeah, on a curb. It's awesome. Maybe.

I don't know if Hemingway did or not. Yeah. We'll look into it. Maybe. We'll do literature when you're gone. Yeah. I would like to be here for literature. All right.

We'll do literature when you're here if you want to. Yeah. Okay. That's just, that's where. I have fun. Why would you do the things that I don't do or the, I don't know if y'all know how comedy works. We'll do golf when you're gone then. Yes. That would be exactly. That's how comedy works. You pick someone that doesn't know golf. Okay. Pick someone that doesn't know literature. Okay. So we have a lot of, that opens up the door for a lot of stuff.

Yeah. Yeah. It's insane that you are just learning how comedy works now. So. And then we'll do it. And two minutes in he'll be like, and who cares? That's because you. Well, yeah, I'll be here. All right. I'll be there. September 5th, Cincinnati Comedy Club, Commonwealth Comedy Club, excuse me, September 6th and 7th, in Indianapolis, September 14th in Brookhaven, Mississippi, September 21st, Perigul, Arkansas. Wow.

Oh, is that what we're doing? Anything you want to plug? September 14th, Shreveport, September 20-something. somewhere yeah yeah majestic theater in dallas nice that's a great theater uh september 20 paps theater Milwaukee awesome great and then um October 11th the the Vic in Chicago the reason I'm mentioning those is because uh we need to sell some more yeah yeah the Vic in Chicago yeah yeah yeah that's a great venue I'm excited about it it is yeah I'm in yeah I'm in Chicago this weekend I'll pitch it for you yeah yeah yeah yeah go out there

to the VIC. The Vick's a famous, famous venue. A lot of specials tape there. Yeah, yeah. It's a really cool spot. Yeah. That's a good run there.

Yeah. It sure is, man. Yeah. I'm on 25 cities all fall. I think I'm doing two, I'm doing two comedy clubs in September and Knox, or let's see, Lexington and going down in Huntsville and then I'm out in all fall. Yeah.

I get it all figured out. Is this props? Yeah. The prop tour is next. Hey, no, hey, don't run the prop. It's going to be its own thing. Like, I'm ruining the prop tour. I think it started.

No fires. No fires in the greener. That's right. Yeah. So, Aaron Weber here, Phoenix, Arizona, Desert Ridge, improv, and then comedy works in Denver, downtown. That's a big one. Nice. Yeah, that's great. I'm hoping we'll get to... Oh, yeah, great. I'm hoping we're going to get to add a show there.

But that's a... Good. So Phoenix, Phoenix in Denver. So come on. All right. All right. Thank you, boys, for being on. Thanks for having us. fun yeah thank you guys this is a good time it's a good time uh all right we love you see y'all later about you Hey!