The Nateland Podcast - #48 Theme Parks

Episode Date: May 26, 2021

This episode, we're talking about theme parks. We discuss how long it would take to ride a roller coaster 12,000 times, delve into what a Nateland theme park would look like, and spend a little too long discussing the career of Fabio.    Co-hosts: Brian Bates ( https://www.instagram.com/brianbatescomic) & Aaron Weber ( https://www.instagram.com/realaaronweber)   Podcast produced by Nate & Laura Bargatze Recording & Editing by Genovations Media https://www.natebargatze.com https://www.allthingscomedy.com https://www.genovationsmedia.com Email - [e-mail]

Hello folks, welcome to Nateland. I'm Nate Bargetzi, Aaron Weber, Brian Bates. Welcome everybody. We're here. I don't know't know we had a long today's been a day yeah long day we're doing it bringing but it's going to be exciting uh and stuff i don't know easing into it yeah i got easy ease into it fell asleep on a plane on the way here uh it was nice there uh yeah i don't know i don't even know how like you know you were telling me when you flew from la to miami it was the plane was crazy it had swivel seats and yeah all kinds of stuff yeah it was yeah i was luckily in first class i don't necessarily wanted to bring that up on the air all right i mean good night. Yeah.

When you fly a lot, you get a lot of miles. You get to do that stuff, so I got lucky to get upgraded. I mean, golly, dude. They tell your story about your bank account. You had a funny thing with your bank account the other day. My first comment. I mean, good night. We're a funny thing with your bank account the other day. My first comment. I mean, good night. We're going to get into your comments, so we're going to avoid those comments.

So, as usual, YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, Apple Podcast Reviews, and nateland at nabargetsy.com. All right, the wrestling episode. Danny Sanchez. This podcast is like if you were drinking some beers with your buddies in the backyard and have already talked about absolutely everything and someone brings up wrestling at 3 a.m and it keeps rolling yeah that's where it does like you someone brings that up and you're like you know at 3 a.m there's something you could be like i don't want to do this which is very like i'm just not in the mood to talk about that you could you say that about

wrestling i think I could. You know, I don't want to get into this right now. Yeah. You ever have someone try to bring something up like that and they want it to kind of keep going? You're like, yeah, let's just stop this early. Yeah. Let's be done.

David Granum, Nate and Brian's sudden knowledge of the topic like professional wrestling reminds me of the episode of The Office where Kevin is suddenly very good at math because it involved pies. knowledge of the topic like professional wrestling reminds me of the episode of the office where kevin is suddenly very good at math because it involved pies because we knew a lot of i mean yeah uh yeah i wonder did we know that much about it the diehards were frustrated with us because they're like you guys are idiots we knew nothing yeah compared to the real wrestling but compared to me i feel like you both knew oh yeah a ton yeah well it's a super bowl of uh events uh yeah so david we're like i mean david's like you guys were you know what you guys used to wrestle how much stuff you know

like that's they're just used to us knowing so little about everything and then we can get into a little bit of wrestling yeah yeah we don't know there's a whole world yeah i mean it's it's a whole thing and uh we have i have plenty of friends that know a lot more about it than i did maybe do another episode about it if i've had dan soda knows a ton yeah yeah that's what people were saying yeah yeah yeah if we if soda ever comes back or not comes back uh if soda comes on, which we found out Titans – 49ers played at the Titans this year. Yeah.

Like right before Christmas, so he might come down to that. Is he a 49ers fan? Yeah. He's not a Broncos fan? His mom lives – or his grandmother lives up that way. Okay. So his dad went – I believe dad like when moved there and he grew up in aurora and uh so it's he's a nuggets fan but i mean he's 49 is what he grew up okay loving

and he's i mean he's a big fan oh that's cool uh yeah jack preston love getting deep insights from this education podcast like andre the Giant is so big, it's so crazy. It's a quote straight from the source. Yeah. Well, when you call him a giant, it doesn't do it justice how big he is. Yeah. There's a lot of people that you could say are giants. I mean, meeting Undertaker, that's a big dude.

Yeah, he's huge. He's huge. Right. and under the giant was much bigger than that yes yeah you know the old uh offensive lineman that used to be called refrigerator perry yeah he would not even be one of the biggest dudes on a team i mean it's comical how small he is now yeah yeah so but that actually holds up andre the giant yeah so i thought it was uh it was worthy of it yeah andre the giant is so big it's so crazy that's very funny though which is i mean that's how you would describe it yeah you know it's like you go well how big is it go it's so big dude and it's it's just so crazy and you're like well give me a little more than that you're like i don't know if i can no yeah i mean even like a door frame you're like it's not even that yeah it's bigger

than that yeah you ever hear the saying if you if you haven't seen it no explanation will suffice if you have seen it no explanation is necessary that's what i think about Andre I don't know if that statement was necessary that's very philosophical I'm just saying if you've seen Andre the Giant how big is he? You just have to go see him just go look at him I can't describe him he's big dude

Ron Curry Aaron asks does he say if you smell what the rock is cooking followed by Nate saying no he says if you smell what the rock is cooking followed by nate saying no he says do you smell what the rock is cooking he's not asking a question nate not knowing that both of these sentences are indeed questions is why i listen to this podcast uh yeah he wants an answer you guys smell what I'm cooking? And they're like, eh, a little bit If Bates was a professional wrestler His name would be the ultimate warrior

Worrier Which is funny, Joe List Has a sketch Where he does the ultimate warrior Yeah, he does, he does And I just realized I left off that person's name So I apologize We worry about it the whole show so uh but uh there's our comedian buddy joe

list he does a he does a very funny like sketch where he does he's the ultimate warrior yeah yeah it's very funny uh matt parish i think nate is thinking about mississippi and tennessee not arkansas and tennessee state line runs along the border of Mississippi and Tennessee and West Tennessee. Could be. Could very be that. I hope it's right. Yeah.

State line road. State line road. A lot of people are still saying you're talking about State Street in Bristol. You can step on it and be in Virginia and Tennessee. I mean, I just don't think I was in Bristol. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe so, though just don't think I was in Bristol. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe so, though.

But you were hanging out in Memphis? I think it was – why did I go? I don't know. What did I do? Were you with me? I went to Memphis. We went to the Bass Pro Shop. Yeah.

Which they have – the Bass Pro Shop there is enormous. The Pyramid. The Pyramid. The Pyramid. It's crazy. I mean, the Grizzlies played in it, and now it's a Bass Pro Shop. Did the Grizzlies play there, too? Yeah. Wow.

I mean, and the NBA teams. LeBron James has played basketball in a Bass Pro Shop. Yeah. I mean, Michael Jordan might have. I don't know when they came. When did they start? It's been a while, but they've been in the FedEx Arena for a while now, too. Yeah, yeah. I mean, Michael Jordan might have. I don't know when they came. When did they start? Did they, was it? Been there a while,

but they've been in the FedEx arena for a while now too. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so that was very early though. So it might've been, so Jordan might have. Maybe. Jordan might go in that Bass Pro Shop and just be doing some shaking and being like, right here, I hit a big jumper. Yeah, they left in 2004.

So he was playing. Yeah, he was playing. Yeah, for sure. So, yeah. I don't know. I will find the streak. Golly, I need to look at it. I'll look it up.

Could be. Mississippi and Tennessee could be right, because if we're down that way. If it's down that way. President's episode, Chase Schubert. I taught U.S. history for seven years until this past fall and have a degree in history education. After listening to so many history-themed podcast episodes over the past several months, I was nervous for the inevitable day that the U.S. president's episode would come. Well, today was that day. I had my notepad ready to keep track

of all the corrections and commentary I thought might be necessary and was bracing for the worst. Folks, somehow y'all nailed it. I would happily return to teaching just so I could sign this podcast to my eighth grade students. Not that it's going to help them pass any major exams about the American Revolution or Civil War, but it just might spark a bit of enough excitement to get the kids generally interested and maybe help them become one of the folks too. There we go.

That's a real teacher. Yep. And he loved it. That feels good. You nailed it. Yeah, that's what we're trying to do. We're not here to talk about debate the Civil War. Who's even heard about the American Revolution?

We're here to talk about Andrew Jackson fighting people. Somebody gave me a great president fact this weekend. They told me to tell you guys. McKinley, McKinley's wife, I don't even remember when McKinley was president, but his wife would have seizures all the time. And this is before they knew what to do with that. Yeah. So the way they handled this is whenever she had a seizure, they'd just throw like a napkin over her head and just wait it out.

So this would apparently happen at like state dinners. Like ambassadors are over and like the president's wife just starts having a seizure. And they just pick up a napkin and put it over her face and just keep eating while they waited it out. And just sit there. Is she good? Yeah, she does this all the time. This is what she does. Don't worry about this.

So what were you saying? And you have to talk to it? Yeah. There could be some of that old president stuff. I have a joke in my act now. I talk about going to the White House. And yeah, that could be, I need a little more with it. So that one could be, it's kind of fun because there is some fun stuff in there.

That's unbelievable. Yeah. We talk about Andrew Jackson throwing parties. Somebody said that the parties would get so wild because he just invited all his friends. They would have to take all the alcohol outside just to lure the people out of the White House

because they couldn't get them to leave. Yeah. It's because of the booze. So it's almost like tempting a dog with treats. Come on out here, guys.

They just start playing closing time at the White House. They do Reese's Pieces like E.T. Booze. Isn't that what they do with the E.T., boo-boos. Isn't that what they do with the E.T.? Yeah, right.

You get E.T. to come out with Reese's Pieces. It's been so long since I've seen that movie, I can't remember. Little airplane bottles of whiskey and stuff. You don't remember him putting Reese's Pieces in E.T.? And he was hiding and it would make him come out? Yeah, he would eat them. I mean, it was, you know. It's a 40-year-old movie.

It's one of those famous scenes of a movie is the Reese's Pieces. Reese's Pieces, I think, are only famous because of that. Because they're not that good and only E.T. could like them. I'm not a big Reese's Pieces guy.

I like them. I think they're better than M&M's. Ooh. Seems crazy. No. Are they along in the same familyM's. Ooh. Seems crazy. No. Are they along in the same family? Yeah. Oh, yeah.

They're the same shape. They're both chocolate. No, I don't think so. Reese's is Hershey. Oh. M&M is... Come on, you know. Mars, maybe?

Yeah. Is that what the M stands for? I feel like you're trying to miss it on purpose. You know, Aaron. Just tell us. Yeah, just get to it on purpose. You know, Aaron. Just tell us. Yeah, just get to it, Aaron. Tell us the history about it. When was the first time you had one?

Do you remember? I gasped when I had my first M&M for sure. Chase Miska. Chase Miska. It sounds like a wrestling name. I'm impressed and relieved that you had an entire episode about US presidents

and still managed to avoid talking politics duels hats UFOs and animal nicknames are my kind of politics

keep up the great work yeah it was you know yeah I did like that we did that like it's because it is so crazy

there's so much fun stuff. They were all getting shot. Yeah. We got enough going about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Every one of them was getting assassinated. And we didn't even get to all of them. Oh, yeah.

There's a lot more that either got shot at or... Yeah. Somebody pointed out, why didn't you mention Reagan being shot? He didn't get that far. No. We got to like the 1920s we got the last thing the fact we have was about reagan but i mean we had enough guys dying that we don't have to cover just the flesh wounds yeah yeah well we like we could probably i mean we probably do another one uh it is it's just fun it's fun to uh you know i don't know that's the funnest part to talk about that kind of stuff you don't get too close to and like and then you start getting into politics yeah

so you just go super old matt wolf the golfer the u.s president episode was hilarious it was mind-blowing hearing you all learn about some of our most famous presidents for the first time however watching the whole episode on YouTube, I could only focus on one thing. What on earth is sitting on the table next to the Nateland sticker near Nate's right orange hand? I could not take my eyes off of it, and my friends and I were trying to guess what it was.

Could it have been keys, a half-eaten cookie? One of my friends recommended maybe it was a retainer. If I don't find out what it is i may lose my mind is it this that's what it was yeah it's uh uh kevin best made us uh can you zoom in on it uh a key chain with all of us you got it again just keep doing this the whole show michael scott just yeah who thought we just had a loose retainer on the table yeah it did look like one yeah i mean i still wouldn't have thought that was it but i see how it looked like it yeah you're like all right uh yeah so that was

it that's what's on the table but i get how that could be confusing. This is a pin. From Zanus. Start going, Matt, see your buddies. It's what we call like a cup and a coaster. Says Tonight Show. He's just going to start asking stuff.

Every week we got to explain it. Yeah, Matt, how you doing? This is a table. And so a lot of people have been using those to eat on and stuff like that for a long time uh and so we kind of decided to go with one we are not eating on it but uh that was this is uh for what makes this a table hey it's a great question it's a great question we answered it though yeah no we didn't yeah we did i said what uh what was the i said something you said you go by its purpose.

Yeah. That's what determines a table. What is a table? Who determines the purpose, the creator of it or the user of it? It's another interesting question. The creator, because he says, well, they both do. The creator goes, I get you started, because here's what I would do. Every time we're by a table, a guy walks in, he goes, all right,

what I would do is I would probably eat on this table and we go okay well we have some other options and he goes your table yeah you do whatever you want but i mean if you make a dining room table yeah specifically for a dining room okay making a table for a room okay where dining is right so the creator is he does i made this for this purpose right and what you do with that is what i put a mattress on here and use it as a bed frame you're being a lunatic so you can i mean if you want to do that you can yeah but that's what like with the philosophy ideas like if someone says that you go well there's a point where you're just a crazy guy in the street uh-huh yelling at cars yeah so you can get there quickly yeah you're like so i mean it can it can all stop but the we've all we needed something to put the food on yeah our desk to write on as an office here we are to lay our key chain on. Okay. Yeah. That's fair.

This philosophy, I think I would crush it in there. You would, man. I think I'd go in and they wouldn't like it. I'd just be holes. I'd go, that's stupid. Did they really ask y'all like the table thing? Were they really? That's just a thought experiment. Would it be more like when you're building it,

when does it become a table? Well, it's just an example to illustrate the question of what makes things what they are. Because if it didn't have legs, you wouldn't say it's a table, right? Yeah. It'd be a table on the ground. Yeah, it'd just be a slab of wood at that point.

So maybe a table's not the best, but usually an apple. Apple is used a lot. So what do they say? What makes an apple an apple? Is it the redness? So you can think about it like, what if I take away that property from it? Is it still that thing? If you take away the redness of an apple, it's still an apple.

Wouldn't you agree? It's a ruined apple. Yeah. It's just green apples. Yeah, yeah. So the color doesn't make it an apple. If you take away the sweetness or the shape of it, you take away those things one by one,

you start to realize none of those singular things make it an apple. I mean, but we say apple apple and they're all this one thing so it has to be an apple because it's like we've all said this is what this thing is okay and so when you taste it and you go this is an apple you know what an apple tastes like oh so it's the taste it's the taste that makes it an apple it's every it's maybe it's a bit of everything okay it's not just one thing nothing can be one thing thing. It's a bit of everything. Okay. That's fair. Why do you think that's... I'm saying that's a legitimate... I would think philosophy is just put in just to be annoying.

That's how I would think, y'all. Some of it is, yeah. In philosophy, he keeps saying it. You're going like, just say you don't want to teach, man. Just say that. That's what I would tell the teacher. Just say you don't really care about teaching, and you're trying to like waste time because this is not going to help any like for you think you will but the you could do that all day long yeah there's a point where

you're like you do you do do it all i know then you just go i guess so nothing makes it an apple and you go there and then then you're just done no you go oh there it has an apple-ness that's the answer that's one answer it's a pretty big one that's what aristotle would say You go, oh, it has an apple-ness. That's the answer? That's one answer. It's a pretty big one. That's what Aristotle would say. He would say it has an apple. He would say it has the essence of an apple that's independent of all its accidental properties.

Just a nightmare hanging out. I mean, it's just it doesn't, like, what's this key chain? What makes it a key chain? Is it this that holds the keys? What is this on it? And, like, it's all – it just doesn't stop. It never does. No, it hasn't stopped for thousands of years, man.

And where are we getting with this? Not – I mean, to where we are now. Nowhere. Nowhere. I guess. It reminds me of the office where Michael's taking CPR lessons. And she's like, is he dummy breathing? He's like, no, it also has no arms and no legs.

It's like, at what point do we not revive? What kind of quality of life would that be? Ed Riley Jr. We just watched the U.S. President episode, and I must say we were genuinely surprised. My son's face lit up the moment you guys read the comments, and he sent the episode to all our family members. So I have to say that you guys might have gained a few more unsatisfied viewers.

We want to thank you, Nate, for providing us tickets to his show. If the Sacramento show doesn't happen, and believe me, I've had some words with my so-called friends who sold me tickets to his show that may not happen. One other issue we might have is my wife overheard the episode. Unfortunately, she wants to go as well. So, Nate, you may have to send another ticket. We will. We'll get you all squared away.

The Sacramento show is happening. It's just, I think, a different date. Okay. Yeah. It's all up there. All my dates are up there now. I almost think we're adding a show in the Sacramento show. Yeah, go to...

The Crest Theater in Sacramento? Yeah. And Raincheck Tour. Oh, geez. Yeah, just go to my website. Yeah, give me a minute. That'd be a little bit easier to go to gets it.com then uh sorry that's what a lot of people do but either do like aaron and don't go look at hey we changed our uh hey the coloring of the website yeah it looks how

about that looks good right real nice yeah yeah we did uh i was like let's mix it up a little bit. Sacramento here. Go to March. Oh. Because I think it said March. Yeah. March 5th. That was right. Two shows. Yeah. So March 5th, which is March 5th of 22.

If that, those will happen. I mean, so it got moved to that. It was supposed to be in August, but then because, you know. Jayden has to finish another school year. Oh, yeah. He's going to be praying college. Straight A's, Jayden. But, yeah.

From what I understand, California is never opening again. But if they, when they do. Yeah, so it did get moved to March 5th. But we said to get him tickets to that or there was a show that was closer to him or something but if you we'll get you hooked up for that or he had tickets I don't know

we'll meet him it'll be all figured out Rebecca F the Baby Ruth candy bar was named after Babe Ruth but since the candy inventor didn't want to pay Babe to use his name, he changed one letter. Babe then sued and lost because the candy inventor lied and said it

was named after the Grover Clevens daughter. What's my source? History Channels. The Food That Built America, Season 2, Episode 2. Your source is about as good as our source. I guess you're saying they look stuff up a little more than we do.

Apparently. Baby Ruth. Yeah. I mean, imagine... What was it like suing someone back then? Yeah, I don't know. I mean, if you met Baby Ruth, I'm going to sue you, and you're like,

what are you suing for? Like, my wood, my cow? She's getting animals? Because I won 40 goats and a lot of land. And you're like, all right. How much land? They know a lot. Just one lot.

You're like, oh, they said a lot of it. A lot. No, a lot. So you don't want the whole thing no no no no a just one lot uh what i was gonna say i looked up the baby ruth had been dead for 17 years when the candy bar came out so babe probably had a she died as a baby um i don't know if she died as a baby she must have died young but she'd been dead for a while. She didn't even have her aunt baby

from Seinfeld. That's where they go. How old would she be today? She never would have made it. It's my favorite, maybe my favorite line in all of Seinfeld. The whole show?

It's unbelievable. Like, he goes, Aunt Baby died when she was a baby. And then, Stel asks Frank, says, you know, Frank,

if Aunt Baby was alive today, how old would she be? And he said, she never would have made it. I mean, he won't even play along in the game. He won't even acknowledge it. She would never, yeah. But you're like, all right, but just in general, like how many years has it been since she died? And he goes, no, it's not even worth her time.

She never would have made it. Here's his events and she died. It ain't worth our time. She never would have made it. Thorin Engeseth. Engeseth. Thorin. You go by Thor?

Yeah. Thorin Engeseth from Middle Earth, apparently. Yeah. Thorin. I wonder if they go by Thor. They go, just call me Thor. And everybody's like, all right, dude. Just, you know. Yeah. You better fit the bill of that. Thorin, I wonder if he, what if they go by Thor? They go, just call me Thor, and everybody's like, all right, dude. Just, you know.

Yeah. You better fit the bill of that. Thorin. Thorin Anguseth. Thorin. Oh, it could be Thorin. Probably like the 12th or something. Oh, maybe they own. I mean.

They could own a city. Yeah, probably. Anguseth. Sounds like they. It sounds like they have a river named after them in England or something. Yeah, exactly. Oh, yeah. Wow.

Aaron was right to be skeptical of the history of OK since it's not really known where it came from and what Brian said was just a theory. That sounds like someone that did own a lot of stuff early on and was probably his family was in the mix when OK came about. Yeah. And he goes, no, I had my great grandparents. My uncle said he came up with it, like these idiots.

When OK came out, like it dropped like a mixtape. What's that? He goes, OK, OK, I'll be ready. What did you just say? Huh. Okay, okay. He just says it a couple times. That's how stuff, let's go, started, like, this whole let's go, which makes me – I've talked about that on here, right?

I don't think you have. We talked in private about it. I'm so angry. Yeah, that's how I privately bring it up. When people just get up and they go, let's go, it makes me so mad. I feel like a lot of the stuff I start to say i start to say it ironically and then it just becomes unironic over time and i find myself saying it actually do you have an example yeah so it's still the worst you're still the worst for doing it i agree yeah i'm trying not to do that but like if i say something's like that's, like I say it as a joke,

and then down the road I'm like, I said that without thinking it was a joke. I say bounce. I'm like, let's bounce. Bounce has been around forever. Yeah, I'm kind of stuck in my age group. Something could be pretty dope. I could say dope. I'm kind of stuck with my i haven't really left

he says like rad he says like gravy uh groovy and groovy and red no i think i was still but after him okay yeah i say old kinderhook yeah i was saying it before they shortened it yeah uh yeah like everybody we said let's go when we announced, because the social media, when they posted my special date, they put let's go. Yeah. And I was like, I was so mad. And it was on my thing, but someone else posted it, and I was like, don't, I can't stand it.

I don't know. Everybody says it. I just don't like when everybody, it's not like I don't like the saying. I like the saying i like the saying it's now everybody is saying it they're at their grocery store just going let's go save 20 today like it's like all right dude tom brady says it but you don't need a super yeah like a nba player dunk like it's like a guttural let's go that's what it's built for it's not built for regular people just doing nothing you know just going got enough gas to get to the gas station let's go

you know like that's not what it's for it's you know uh uh griffin bryant sounds like that's another one griffin bryant sounds like a park you know yep there is a bryant park i believe and there's probably a griffin park griffin yeah i own both of them so maybe his family got divorced and they his wife got one and he got the other you know i don't know the parks and then they named her after both of them. I'm surprised at all the assassination talk. The curse of Tippy Canoe wasn't brought up. Starting in 1840, every 20 years, whoever was president died in office. This went all the way until 1980 when Reagan survived his assassination attempt

in colon cancer, then finished his term. 20 years later, Bush an assassination assassination attempt on him now biden sits in office 20 years after that that's crazy uh did you look this up i did have an assassination you know what are they talking about the shoe that got thrown at him no i looked it up i didn't think you've been hit by a shoe and shoes they that was where was that that was like over in uh i think it was in iraq yeah yeah you kind of shoes they got to wear over there to walk around in that the whole their whole floor is dirt like you got to wear like boots dude like it ain't you wearing loafers

i did not remember bush having an assassination attempt i was sitting next to my wife who worked in the Bush administration. She didn't remember it, but we looked it up. Someone threw a grenade at him. They were in the country of Georgia. Yeah. And someone threw a – and it didn't go off. It didn't detonate.

Wow. And it landed near him? I don't know how close it got to him, but they were trying to kill him. How quick did you read this article? Was there no details in it? There probably was. I was just verifying if it was true. I have to do a lot of research, guys.

I don't have time to get in the weeds. That's pretty crazy. That just never made the, yeah, this is. The mainstream news. 2005. This happened in 2005 in Georgia. It was a Georgia nationalia national named vladimir won't even take a stab at the last name attempted to assassinate him wow see if you can make him

turn around vladimir a rooty onion i don't know i mean if you said vladimir he would but if you just had to say his last name vladdy. Vladdy. That's what I'd do. Well, I mean, he's probably going to be behind bars right now. It'd be pretty easy. He might still not turn around, even though he's the only one in the jail cell. Yeah. Wow. It landed 61 feet from the podium.

So not a great toss. Not a great toss. 61 feet is pretty far. Probably why we didn't hear about it. Yeah. 61 feet is like a pitcher's mound to the home plate. It is. 60 feet, six inches.

Yeah. So pretty far. I mean, that's crazy. It didn't engulf him. It would have killed. We would have definitely heard about it. If it would. Yeah. We might have found out eventually if the president was assassinated. if it yeah

we might have found out eventually if the president was assassinated if we go guys did you hear W was assassinated well I'm saying it would have it would have

it hit a girl it said and the thing didn't go so I'm saying if we would have heard if it would have heard,

if it would have just even killed, I mean, 61 feet. Yeah. I don't know if it would have killed the president, 61 feet. I don't know a lot about grenades. I've thrown a few in my life, but no, I've never thrown a grenade. Bush didn't even know about it until after the rally ended.

They didn't even stop him. I don't know if anybody knew about it. I don't think so, except Griffin. somebody send him anthrax once right you remember the anthrax uh scare i think it was right after 9-11 who hasn't been sent uh you tell me someone ain't been sitting there byron smith you got to say i hate white rabbits to make the smoke go away. And what I said, I remember saying, what was it? Fuzzy bunnies. Yeah, I think he had bunnies. Yeah.

But someone commented on it. There's a lot of, I mean, we got so many different. There's a lot of debate about what the exact phrase is. I think it was fuzzy bunnies, fuzzy bunnies. I think that's what I remember. Fuzzy bunnies. When someone put that in, I was like, yeah, that's what I've heard. But it's all, but we know it's not uh if you're a rabbit it's not good news

a lot of people said you had to say it three times yeah well what what is oh so it's like a supernatural thing it's not i was thinking the yeah it's like the breath coming out is what makes it do it. I thought maybe that was the thinking. It's like when you mouth elephant foot. Have you ever done that? No. You say.

It looks like I love you? Yeah. Okay. And then you go, nah, I said elephant foot, you loser. And then you open up to me and I go, what a loser. That's the whole point of that. You go elephant foot and the person goes, I whole point of that. You go elephant foot. And the person goes, I appreciate it,

man. I love you too. And you go, beat it. Dumb person. And then you, you say, I just said elephant foot,

which means worse than I don't. You go, so you don't love me. You go, I hate you. Yeah. I said elephant foot. All right.

Uh, it's, uh, it's nice to be back. We were, I've been, it's gone. It's gone for be back. I've been gone. I was gone for 10 days. I was at the Miami Improv.

I'm wearing this shirt. They have a very cool no sleeves today, so I'm going to see how that looks. Some of y'all might already be turned off. But, yeah, this is all the staff wears. I mean, one of the best improv shirts I've seen. Yeah. And Miami was awesome, dude. Well, we were in Des Moines before that.

Des Moines was wonderful as well. Des Moines was great. Funny Bone. Funny Bone, great, great club. And then the Miami Improv, it's a new Miami Improv. They used to have, the old one, the room was split, which is very funny. You'd go on stage, the door would open, you'd just be on stage. And the crowd, like in the the front the crowd would be sitting and then there was like a v-shaped wall with an office

in the middle so then the seats went like there so those if you were in the back you would not see the other half of the crowd and it and performing to it was it felt like that it's like two different rooms two different rooms yeah and it's weird it feels weird you ever do well in one room and then the other room oh yeah yeah i mean i've done shows in two different rooms anyway just like starting out but yeah you could feel like oh this side is like not getting it this side gets it and you really feel that where when it's the way it is now it's not that at all now it's a great wonderful room uh but it was always weird funny i did it with uh this comic al jackson and uh al jackson is a uh a black comedian so me and him were co-headlining very funny and then uh oh yeah he was dude i called him

when he was about to this was years ago and uh i called him uh and i was like hey are you here in miami he goes no we're about to land he just answered the phone on the plane he's like and i go you're talking on the plane dude and he's like yeah yeah he goes but we're about we're landing i think right now like and i was like uh but when you looked at the marquee it said nate b and al jackson they didn't have enough letters for bargetzi so i was like if someone walks in and then they see me and him co-headlining and they don't know who we are. I mean, he definitely looks like Nate B.

And they think, well, that's Al Jackson. The white Southern guy. Yeah, that's Al Jackson. Everybody's confused. But this was, yeah, Des Moines was awesome. Everybody was very super nice great hotel there there's a hotel called uh serity it's downtown des moines uh and they were really really cool to us uh and it was it's it's pretty it's like brand new and it they uh the whole everybody there was

like really cool and then uh miami uh i went to la too. But Miami. Miami surprised me. I was talking about it. I was like, I don't know, selling tickets in Miami. It's kind of tough. Dude, their crowds are awesome. They're just like so much good energy, and they're so excited. Oh, that's cool. And there's so many different people.

They were young. They were older. It was just a great mix. And Miami's a fun town. I don't even know. I've been. I've been. They were older. It was just a great mix. And Miami's a fun town. I've been. I've been. I've been. But I don't think we stayed in Miami, not too far from South Beach,

but not in South Beach. We drove over there. But Miami's just a – I like it. It's like a good vibe. Like everybody's – I don't know. it's a fun to party down there. Yeah. Like it's a – you know, but it's not – I don't know, it's not crazy. Everybody seems nice.

Food's great. It was fun. I really like Miami. And then L.A. We went to L.A. too, in the middle of that. They got some great outdoor shows in L.A. Yeah. There's one called Supernova.

Yeah. And there's another one called Jam in the Van. And those are the two I did. And there's Supernovas in the Round. It's all outside. Yeah. It was nice. It was nice to get up in L.A.

Just because it's been. Nick Novicki. Yeah, Nick was out there. Nick popped out there for us. Adam Ray. I saw Adam. Adam was supposed to be on the podcast today, and he couldn't make it. But, yeah, I think Adam's at Zany's Wednesday.

Yeah, tonight. Yeah, tonight. The day this comes out. The day this comes out. If y'all remember Adam when he was here. If you're in Nashville, he's at Zany's. So, yeah, it was fun. I mean, it was a good, you know,

a good little trip. I got Travis, uh, my buddy that I grew up with is my tour manager. Uh, and he's new. He's having, he's having to go through it. Yeah. So obviously never been a tour manager. Uh, and so he had, we got, he got our car towed. Where? But near the Miami Improv. He parked at this famous Dave's parking lot. And there's signs everywhere that say they're going to tow you. But he went and talked to famous Dave. No, no.

Dave was there. David. He goes, yeah. Now, he goes and talks to the manager in there. And he's like, can I park at this thing? Because they were kind of closed yeah and he goes yeah that's fine and i mean i think he goes yeah it's fine and then they just immediately towed our car and so he had to go get it uh and so yeah but he was yeah it was good justin smith was with me uh and uh he does great and so yeah it was a fun you know did the manager did did he go talk to

the manager say what happened yeah they're it's operated outside of him so it's not like it's faint it's not like it's famous dave's deal they're just like they do it and then there's other signs and then they just call this company uh i think they said this's a guy who walks around in just like VME View Park. Even the towing company, they told them, they've been calling us all night. Like we've just had to tow everybody. Wow. So, yeah.

See, I don't know if there's money involved or something. I mean, look, your park's in no towway zone. Yeah, you can get towed. But it's, I mean, it's funny if the touring guy would be like, yeah, we don't even want to go there anymore. Like, they're just calling, we're towing everybody. So it was tough. But, you know, overall, wonderful trip.

Yeah. Wonderful trip. That's awesome, man. Love Miami. And I'll be in Naples June 11th through 13th. So one more little Florida trip. And then also the One Night Only Tour. Our One Night Only Tour.

All these tour names. The Raincheck Tour. The Raincheck Tour. All of them are up. All the dates are up. The dates that we've listed, we're going to be adding much more. So many more cities we will be adding. I'm touring everywhere.

And so I get a lot of like, you're going to add Texas. You're going to add Denver, Chicago. Yes, I will be adding those cities. We just can't announce everything right now. But I will be coming. This is going to be a full-on tour. So we will be out there on the road. And so make sure you go check that out.

A lot of these were added. I mean, we posted a bunch today. We've added a bunch of shows. I think some of these might have a third show added, a lot of late shows added. So just go get these tickets. These tickets, people are buying them, which is very nice and very sweet.

I can't thank you enough for not buying them. But make sure you go get these tickets. These tickets, people are buying them, which is very nice and very sweet. I can't thank you enough for not buying them. But make sure you go get them so you can get out to the rain check tour. All new hour. Yeah. Yeah. That's exciting. That's pretty amazing, man.

Yeah, it's pretty good. Maybe, you know, it could be terrible. Yeah. good maybe you know uh could be terrible though uh yeah so uh did and then this is your last week of freedom yeah yeah what should i do i get married and uh six days go to mexico for a little bit now he means permanently yeah start over i want to see you as they come over this border this way you going go in that way. And they can, you always see the videos of like them going through a river.

I just want to see you walking through the river the opposite way. Hey, is this the best way to go? Yeah. Yeah. It's good. High five. Yeah.

One of them can have my spot. I'm going to live. I live here now. Oh, you just walk into that river. That's one of my heartbreak kid with Ben Stiller. He has to come over the border illegally. Yeah.

And then he does it. And he's like, he's got a baby. And he keeps getting caught. And he falls in the water one day. And he holds him. And by the time he gets, he's been trying to get over the border for months. He speaks full Spanish. It's amazing.

Yeah, do that. You don't hear about that much people going over the border that way. Yeah, I would think Shawshank would rip the shirt off in the rain. Never seen it. Through the Rio Grande. You've never seen Shawshank? No. Watching E.T. on Whip. Yeah, E.T. you might have already been, I guess, too old for it.

But it's, I watched it. That's the first movie I ever saw at a movie theater. That was E.T. Yeah. So how old would you have been? I mean, I've seen it. Yeah. It's just been close to 40 years since I've seen it.

Yeah. I was, yeah. Yeah. My parents drove me and you drove. I think it was like 82 or something when it came out. Oh, yeah. So I don't even remember seeing it. I was three.

But I do know that was my first movie and I cried. And then, you know what else I'm watching? I'm going back to The Matrix. I don't think I've ever saw The Matrix either. I never have. Yeah, yeah. Well, I started watching it and then it's all you know i don't even know if i really get it but i mean i started the second one there's just a whole town they just i don't want to give anything away you should watch it oh yeah it's like you're the major first is like this little thing that's

reloaded right isn't it the second one? Okay. Yeah, they don't do two or three. Yeah, that's annoying. So you got to go look it up. That's a clear example, I think, of a movie they never thought they'd be making sequels to. Yeah. And then it did so well. Well, they were saying, Justin on the road with us, he said that they were going to make it, the first one, all make three episodes.

And they go, no, you can make one. So then they had to combine three seasons or three movies into one. And it was unbelievable. Yeah. And they go, okay, now you can make three. And they're like, oh, that was the whole story. You're like, that was kind of everything. But, yeah, because it just pops in.

Second one, I don't know. There's a town. And you're like, I don't even. You're like, where did it end? I got asked like Travis. I was like, so there's just a town? Like, am I supposed to know that this is? I just don't, you know.

And other thing I started watching, your West Wing. Have you really? Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. This is exciting. Have you watched it?

I haven't. Get on it, dude. I'd love to. But he This is exciting. Have you watched it? I haven't. Get on it, dude. I'd love to. But he was covering it. Channel 5 News. President Bartlett? What do you think, man? Do you like it?

Yeah. It's kind of quick-paced, right? It's super quick. That's all Aaron Sorkin. Yeah. Just dialogue, dialogue, dialogue. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I'm maybe only two episodes in.

Okay. Three, but yeah, I enjoyed it. I like the actors. dialogue dialogue yeah yeah yeah uh i think i'm maybe only two episodes in okay three but i uh yeah i enjoyed it like i like actors like it i do like the quickness of it uh-huh uh and so yeah it's uh yeah it's good that's exciting yeah so we're seeing yeah see how far i get see if i get rolling on it yeah you might i'm not gonna probably understand a lot of this uh what the show yeah well that's a lot of aaron sorkin stuff is just like you you don't even necessarily have to understand what they're talking about it's just like professional gibberish yeah just to let you know hey they're smart and they know what they're doing yeah you don't have to know everything that's going on yeah yeah you know it's like philosophy it's kind of that yeah yeah i think so it's basically yeah

yeah it's a good that's a good. Yeah, just like it's professional gibberish. Professional gibberish, right. But then you want to go, so no one really knows. Yeah. Like philosophy would be like that. Eventually you would go, you could get by the end of it, you could go this whole, like the last day of your school, you go, this is all made up, right?

They tell you that the last day? No, you have to say that to the teacher. Oh, you confront the teacher vitally. You have an F. Yeah. And you go up to him and go, let's just admit that none of this matters. R is true, and it's just talking. It has no real consequences on anything.

Yeah. And he goes, changes that F to an A. And he goes, you did it. You passed the test. You passed the test. And then you're out there talking gibberish. Yeah. What is a table? Yeah. Imagine imagine walking in just hearing that class and this is our fossil dude what is a cup that's what a lot are you drinking

out of a cup i have a cut you had to take two philosophy classes at at school so everybody had to take these classes dude people were just like they were furious so many of these kids like this is so dumb i used to hear him just like how could you not just be whatever grade he gets you go what determines what you think what this by grade i should get how do you know what i should be learning or what i did or did not learn like why didn't you do all that i got i got real lost in that question exactly well that's part of it yeah but if he goes, here's an F, and you go, how do you give me an F and not an A? What if an F is an A? Who are you to tell me what I've learned about this philosophy class?

What do you know? Do you have philosophy figured out? Because either you know philosophy and have it figured out, or you don't. Maybe you know no philosophy, and maybe you're the least qualified to teach philosophy, but you have the audacity to give me an F based on what? How could you not, right? Would that not work? I think Aaron just didn't go to class. That was a big part of it.

Yeah, for some of the classes. It's a little bit like your Bowen class. That I didn't do well. You didn't go to philosophy. You change an F to an A with one line. Yeah. You know? Yeah.

So why? Yeah, I didn't think it needed to be said i think everybody got that but if yeah so aaron this is how aaron everybody listening this is what aaron thinks of your intelligence this is notre dame right here he thinks we don't know you can change hey everybody like us we've been changing f stays a A's a long time, man. Before we get home, we go, look, it's an A. Why is it a different ink? I don't know. Her ink thing ran out when she was doing it. This one, did you have anything?

Nothing. Oh, yeah. Did you decide on your Grossman's gift? I did. And I want to thank everybody that reached out and a lot of people messaged me that had like engraving services and they had a lot of great ideas

I ended up getting. With none of their ideas? No it was just a time thing because they were messaging me and I was like I have to ship them what I want and whatever so it just would have taken long I feel like y'all are going to make fun of me for what I ended up doing, but I got them.

I got everybody rare, uh, flask, no baseball cards for a player like relevant to them or our relationship. Like I went and found old rookie cards and autograph cards and got them framed up yeah something a little different but yeah but it was interesting to me to kind of go through and find players that i thought they would relate to you know and hopefully it's something that increases in value

uh years what's that uh yeah like what like one could you name one could you say one or yeah sir for my brother i got a bo jackson 87 rookie card legit rookie yeah yeah yeah and framed up was he a bo jackson fan or no i well is he black my actual brother yeah no that's what i mean your actual brother you're like you go this is i think this is obvious uh why i got you this no i know this is for like sappy reasons but they i have their traits and both of them yeah have the same traits that i admire i don't know i felt like something different to me the way he ran up that wall and ran back down that wall reminded me of just the all the hurdles you had to go through in your life no something. Something like that? That would be a stretch, but it was a little more,

a little better. When he got injured, his career was cut short. That reminded me of all the potential you left out on the table. Like Bo Jackson, you are a what-if story.

You could have been the best of this family, but you were injured and riddled with whatever. Yeah. I think that's cool. Yeah. Thank you.

I've started collected baseball cards. Do they know already? No. So now they will? Well, none of them listen to this. No, I think my brother does. They'll find out eventually. I don't know.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yeah, it's different. Yeah. It's different. And then they can put it up on a yeah it's it's a nice display type thing you know the baseball card market is insane you can't find baseball cards anywhere did you have to change anybody up because you couldn't find the original one you wanted yes a few or afford it for sure you know some are crazy expensive yeah if you go like get Mike Trout rookie card, they're cheap as you can find. It's $2,000 for a rookie card from 10 years ago.

Yeah. It's insane. Target stopped selling them because people were having fights. Huh. Yeah. They were storming the shelves. It's pretty crazy, man. I was a huge baseball card collector.

Yeah? I still have them all. Oh, yeah? You ever a huge baseball card collector. Yeah? I still have them all. Oh, yeah? You ever gone back and... Yeah. I went back recently. I did not buy this when he played. I bought this at an auction.

It was just a box for cheap, and I went through them. It was a Roger Maris rookie card. Oh, nice. Wow. I mean, it's not worth a ton, but you know it's depending on you talk to a few hundred dollars it's in pretty good condition it's not in mint condition but it's a good condition like roger mares roger mares would be the rookie card you have like it's like a perfect it's not mickey man it But it's like, I mean,

he had the home run record. You know, it's like a very funny, you know, where you're like, yeah, it's a good card. That was my go-to thing, though, when we would be at the checkout line with my mom, pack a Topps baseball card. I'd get that over candy. If they still sold them,

I'd still do it at the checkout line. Now they're like 50 bucks a pack if you find them 50 bucks a pack i remember when they used to be a dollar 50 or a dollar yeah uh yeah or a buffalo nickel i was done collecting them when they were a dollar he got out of it he goes what are these crazy these ain't gonna go that high yeah Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, baseball cards, it would be curious to see. I don't know if I have any. I mean, I did.

I collected them, too. Yeah. It's a fun nostalgia thing, too. It is a fun thing. It is. Yeah, remembering all these players, and it's cool. Yeah. So this week, we are going to talk about theme parks. You know, we talked about carnivals and stuff, or fairs.

A little bit. World's fairs. World's fairs. So we said, you know, what about theme parks? You know, so here we are. I'm pretty interested in theme parks. Are you big theme park guys? uh i am i like going i mean i'm probably getting a little more scared of riding rides than i uh was i was better at it uh if i get my but i want it's hard when you have a kid because you want your daughter like i don't

want her to be scared i think i got scared of riding rides uh one was the nashville fairgrounds i don't know if i told this story there remember the remember that white roller coaster they had at the fairgrounds yeah uh you would that thing is what scared me from riding roller coasters because something would fall off of it regularly i mean if you went you would see a piece like you would just see something kind of go down and you're like is that good that that's down and it would it would make you uh it was just like not put together good uh and so i remember going to that as a kid and i remember uh i think we wrote it and then uh my you know then my mom I think my mom was like,

because my dad would always want us to go, and my dad always told my mom that she's the one that made us scared. Because then when we were, you know, my daughter's age, 8, 9, 10, 11, my dad would want to ride a ride, and we were like, no. None of us are riding these rides. And I did get better. I've ridden a lot of rides. The big one we rode was the Beast at Kings Island.

We'd go to Kings Island. The Beast was the longest wooden roller coaster in the world. I don't know if it is now. And I remember my dad said, he's like, we'd always go. He's like, if you ride this roller coaster, I'll let you buy something, whatever you want. Oh, interesting. And, I mean, it's so funny that my daughter now,

she just knows she's going to get something. So there's no real reward. Incentives don't work like that at all? Because I'll get it eventually. I mean, to buy something growing up, they just couldn't afford it. Going to it was enough. We'd always have to go out of the park to eat yeah you'd always have to bring your own lunch and like you know like you see all you i mean there's so many things this is why i do spend money like if i go to a park now just because

like growing up uh which i might actually say this in a part of the joke uh because growing up i didn't do it so i might bail on what I was saying because it actually might fit in a spot but it's but yeah we would always have to go out and

like and I just remember wanting to just you know I just want to buy the food that's in there yeah and I have a big thing

with that everywhere if I go to Disney World now like I I'm like we're eating here we're eating inside so my daughter's getting the rewards

of me getting no rewards yeah and the fact that i will yeah i mean that's you got nothing right all this stuff you got nothing so your daughter gets everything yeah yeah this is the beast right here looking at it it's the longest wooden roller coaster in the world yeah i uh i wasn't a big i've never been a big roller coaster guy i was always too scared of them but uh growing up we uh the only place we'd ever go was our opryland yeah did you ever make it opryland no it was opryland was gone by the time i moved here yeah it closed in 97 so you're you'd have been young yeah very young but been, yeah, very young. But they had a ride. This is one of the old rides there, the Wabash Cannonball.

Do you remember that, Nate? Oh, yeah. I worked there. And it went upside down. Yeah. And when we went once, it was me and my sister and my cousin. And I was probably about 10, and he was 8, which at that age, that's a huge difference

because the 10-year-old is supposed to be so much ahead of that year old. And my sister who's five years older than me wanted to ride it. And I was scared to do it. I couldn't do it. And my eight year old cousin was willing to do it. And it was such a pride versus fear moment for me because I'm two years older than him. I should be the big brave guy. And I just couldn't do it. I just, I chickened out. Fear won. You never wrote it fear i did later but not that particular day i just fear one out and they went and wrote it and got off and loved it but i was just too scared to do it just going upside down for it just was too much for me uh yeah opera was awesome uh oh yeah well i've seen this uh we i worked there uh my first job i believe i ever had and i remember mom my mom dropped me off to where i went and got my uniform and i checked in and

they gave me a broom and what did you do was it just i was a sleeper yeah like i never i never got to where like you got to send people off on a roller coaster. But, yeah, I remember this roller coaster. It's so crazy to me that they tore this down. I don't know why. You talking about Opryland in general? Yeah. Was it prime real estate? Where was it? No, I mean, the mall's there now.

Oh, it was where the mall is now. It's where the mall is. You know, I read a little bit about it, why they did it. And, I mean, I never read a good reason. One, it said when Dollywood came in, it took away a lot of people from this part of the country. Yeah. And then Six Flags opened, I think, in St. Louis or something like that. Yeah.

So regionally, when it first opened, Operating Land was the only theme park even close. And then they took some people. The real estate, it's in between the cumberland river and briley parkway yeah so they couldn't really expand that much they expand as far as they could go yeah and um i think they just finally decided to bail on it wow yeah it was hangman you remember hangman but that came along right at the end that came right at the end uh and it was a roller coaster. You hung.

Your feet hung. So you're sitting in a swing, basically. And that was a big deal because we'd never seen anything like that. And so that was the last thing that came. But Offering was just such a good... It was a very original park. Like it's country music and all this kind of stuff. I mean, Dollywood is that now. But why would they not just make Dollywood just be that?

Like that's – Dollywood's great, though. Dollywood's awesome. But it's just, you know, it's two hours away. It was like – I mean, it was, you know, yeah, I was a sweeper. I did whatever. I was 15 years old, so. You're just doing whatever they need. Yeah, maybe I think $3.25 an hour whatever. I was 15 years old. You're just doing whatever they need. Yeah.

Maybe I think $3.25 an hour was my minimum wage. I remember when the Grizzly River Rampage came. Yeah. I was into it because that's not a roller coaster. That's a whitewater raft. And I'm fine with getting wet. I just don't want to go fast and high. Would you go down to Old Mill Screen?

Is that the Flume Zoom? No. It was the one that was kind of like you set all the way down and you go down the Old Mill screen? Is that the Flume Zoom? No. It was the one that was kind of like you set all the way down, and you go down this hill, and then you would stand at the bridge, and everybody gets splashed. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You would do that hill? I would do that.

I mean, a little bit. Maybe not when I was a kid, but when I got a little bit older. I remember you'd be there someday on hot days. You loved getting splashed. Oh, yeah. Kids just get crushed. My daughter does pretty good with rides. Grizzly River Rampage is great.

And then she does good with – she would do that. She rides this Jurassic World ride at Universal, and it's a roller coaster. She's done it there and somewhere else. And it was one that I told her – she goes, I want to ride it. This is when I got, I talked about it in my special. It was the trip I got claustrophobia from the Simpsons ride.

And then we go ride, she goes, I want to ride Jurassic World. And Jurassic World is, I mean, everybody knows it, Universal, or it's a roller coaster that's with Jurassic Park stuff. And she goes goes i want to ride that and i was like i go let me i go no way like you know i wanted to ride everything but i

was like there's no way she's going to ride this ride maybe it's a water ride uh and yeah it's a water ride and so she goes no no i want to ride it and i and i was like no she was like crying because she wanted to ride it and i'm like she gets scared of like some stuff and then i was like very surprised that she wasn't being scared of this so i went and wrote it i was like let me just go see what it is first yeah and then i wrote and then i was like all right i was like if you want to ride it and that was actually the that was the moment where i was like oh this claustrophobia thing's not going away because then they shut that thing down and the whole ride i was like i was like feeling it there and uh so i was like but it was uh yes she loved it it was good and fun and yeah it's a pretty

cool ride yeah that's cool yeah i looked up the top travel and leisure just did the best theme parks in the country they're all the ones you'd expect um is is our is uh disney world and is Disney World and Universal are they connected? I don't think so. They're just close. I think you can buy a package and it can go It's weird they set up

a shop in the same city. I think they're friends. They're close. This seven of the top eight theme parks in the country are either Universal or a Disney. Yeah, I think Universal is like Nickelodeon. Because when you go to like Disney World, Universal, I believe,

would be you see all the Nickelodeons. So like Doc McStuffins was we would go. That's where if we wanted to, when she was into Doc McStuffins, which is cartoon, if we wanted to see those things, we had to go to Universal. And those were a big deal for her to see. Well, just a few of the top ones.

Latest in Magic Kingdom, number one, which I have been to that. Universal's Island of Adventure, number two. Where's that at? I thought I had it on here but now I don't see it. I got it. It's got the new VelociCoaster

scheduled to open next month in a Harry Potter themed. It's in Orlando. Oh, Orlando. Okay. Yeah.

I've been there. These roller coasters I think are going to get nuts. I think it's about to get nuts too. Yeah. I mean, you're just going

to keep getting, they're going to get crazier and crazier.ney's animal kingdom is third i thought i had the location on here but uh it's got the world of avatar and avatars do you find that yeah yeah i have been to that do you find that going to these places with your kid kind of it's a different level of enjoyment for you yeah it's the best i mean it the, that's the whole fun of it. Especially we are of our whole family goes and, you know, we went with my brother's kids who, you know, his oldest is, uh,

I don't know, I think she's 13 now. Uh, but so we took her when she was five and, you know, before Harper's born and that. And so, yeah, it was, it's the, that was the enjoyment they believe this stuff's real like they're sitting there that's sitting i mean you know disney's unreal and it's the you know cinderella's castle and you're like you're seeing this little girl that's like that's where cinderella lives like it's yeah yeah there's nothing better than that there's and it's one of the greatest moments I'll probably remember forever is just in taking my daughter, which now she's like a little bit more,

now it's a little more fun along for the rides. I can probably get her on a little more stuff. We can ride some more things than we used to be able to ride. But, yeah, I mean, when I was first taking her to meet the princesses and, like, you're going in and, you know, to do it. When you go in and see them be very excited

and all this stuff, I mean, it's, yeah, it's unbelievable. You used to have a joke about that. About your friends saying, don't take your daughter

to Disney World. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yes. Yeah, yeah,

but don't, you won't waste your money. Yeah. Because you won't remember it. Because you won't remember it. Because you won't remember it. Yeah. But it's like you're taking them because you're like, she can't believe this is real.

What we did is like when she was two, we were living in L.A., we would just go to the free part, which was like, you know, outside of the park where they have all the stores. It was like, just go there because she's two. And then she gets to go into the store and see all this Disney stuff, and you're just kind of, look at all this Disney. Instead of spending all the money to go to Disneyland, it was like, just go walk around this thing.

She's too young to get it. Yeah. And then to really want to see. You can't do much when they're that little. They want to meet the princess. You're basically just going and meeting people all day. Yeah. Just going to look at stuff, essentially. You're basically just going and meeting people all day. Just going to look at stuff, essentially.

You're kind of looking at stuff. They had some great stuff in Disney World where they had this game that you played. It was a map, and you had to go find stuff throughout the park. That was a very fun thing to do. So it's a whole day. It's a whole day. But with a kid, you're not just like – I think if you've got boys – I mean, look, a lot of girls know with a kid you're not just like i think if you got boy you know i mean look a lot of girls are riding these rides too and they love it but all my

friends that have boys i mean it's like you know they're just it's a bunch of dudes and their boy they're just running to roller coasters and so you're just right you're like boom we got to run here run here like my buddy doug who did our song at the beginning of this podcast. He's got two boys, and so his boys are just ready to roll. All about it, yeah. And so he goes – I mean, I think they have to kind of map it out to go be like, all right, we've got to hit this ride, this ride. They want to ride every ride. So it depends on who's into rides and not.

Do you get that level of excitement as an adult ever again, or do you just have to get older and then live it again through kids? I think you live it again through your kids, but there's people that just go to Disney World that are obsessed with Disney World. Yeah, that are adults, just like adult couples. And I don't always completely mind. Sometimes people always make fun of those people. It's couples that don't have kids, but they just go to Disney World because they love it so much. I mean,

you know, we're talking about baseball cards. What's the difference of that? That's more ridiculous probably. Yeah. And then, uh, so I,

yeah, I think I could see you go and like, it's a great vacation. This stuff's all kind of there. It's easy to do. Uh, there's a lot of rides, but even if you don't ride the rides,

like you could go and yeah, you could walk around and have a pretty fun day and just's a lot of rides but even if you don't ride the rides like you could go and yeah you could walk around have a pretty fun day and yeah just eat a bunch of garbage and uh it's fun like but i think you definitely live through it through your kids i mean going to see them see this stuff for the first time is pretty spectacular i mean you know when when they go meet elsa and you know we were so we got to go with the frozen craze which was uh unbelievable like it's these still big right yeah it's still big but it was it was nice to be able to go she was at the age which i'm sure every generation has their person but she was at the age where Elsa and Anna

and Frozen and Frozen was such a good movie and it was so we gotta go like see all that stuff trying to think of who that was

for me probably Spongebob when I was really young yeah so I miss Spongebob Spongebob was after I know people always talk about Spongebob

like I never watched it yeah it was pretty big when I was second, third grade, around that age. It was pretty much everywhere. You mentioned the Disney princesses. I was reading a site that, this is like on Reddit, where Disney employees share personal stories and stuff. And they said, if you're playing one of the 90s Disney princess characters,

don't be surprised if newer cast members don't want to sit with you. So they have a break room there. They said it's like high school cafeteria. And if you're Elsa or Anna, you just sit on one side

and you don't even make eye contact with the old characters, Mary Poppins and Snow White. Like, Mary Poppins and Snow White are old people now. They don't want to, and they're not cool. But it's not like they're old.

It's like a young person being them, right? It is, but I guess the kids think Snow White, does your daughter like Snow White? Yeah, yeah. She does?

Yeah, you show all those movies. We met Snow White. Yeah, she loves Snow White. I mean, her favorite has always been that and tiana yeah uh and uh i think that's her name but today so the the theory being the older people with the older characters resent the people who get to play the younger cooler hipper character

meredith yeah she's like meredith which is brave. Wow. Meredith Vieira? That doesn't sound like a real Meredith Vieira. Yeah. Speak Meredith Vieira, fan. Janet. Janet Yellen. Go see. Janet's always working, though.

She's always tough to get, you know. She's annoyed when you come there. What? And you're like, hi, Janet. We saw your thing. She's like, it was a commercial. And you go, you know, she's annoyed when you come there. What? And you're like, hi, Janet. We saw your thing. She's like, it was a commercial. And you go, I know, but we're big fans of the commercial. So do you mind if we take your picture?

Flow from Progressive? Yeah. You want to go meet the flow part of the section? That'd be a great theme park. A commercial. Just commercial characters everywhere. Yeah. I bet it probably not

but it's if like you just go in i mean that's just like the people that watch tv more than anything oh yeah it'd be great dude you get the verizon guy walking around yeah i don't know if people will be walking around that that theme park You're going to need one of those motorized walkways. There's going to be a free-for-all on wheelchairs that you drive. They got Wilford Brimley doing it. I mean, I'm just saying, anybody that would go to a theme park that's commercials, you're watching TV so much that you're not getting up.

Right. And so it's just like a theme park that's – their whole thing would be like you drive four-wheelers around. And they're like, oh, why? There it goes because these people ain't walking around, dude. These people are just in line. They scoot up into McDonald's. Everything's a drive-through.

They have to go get all their food. It's like a reverse mortgage stand. Yeah. So there's a lot of crazy theme parks that, you know, there's a lot of Bible-based. I'm not saying that's crazy, but just unique different theme parks. Dollywood obviously has one. If there was a Nate Land. Oh, Nate Land theme park.

I think you'd go to McDonald's and your burger's already got a bite out of it. Yeah. Yeah, that would be good. Iced coffee and milk. Iced coffee and milk. Oh, man uh the wheeze and the worry the wheeze and the worry be a ride uh you would the clocks would be uh 10 minutes fast so you're always worried that you're late that's the is that something you do no you're worried i'm saying oh that's the worried ride it brings not the worried ride like it's just the whole podcast is just you're you're kind of like oh my god we're gonna miss a

reservation everything just makes you just kind of worried the whole day oh i see yeah because you always kind of forget about it yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah it's pretty good yeah it could be a nate land it could be a nate land yeah yeah i mean a gout foot we just check people out for their gout it's not even a ride it's just a medical it's it's like how they do vaccines at a drive-thru like we're gonna just the gout tent and you're like oh this is like a fun ride you go no literally we're we think gout's a bigger problem than people realize and we're just we just gotta you guys stick your you just pull up and your foot's just out to

out the window and a guy just starts poking it with a pin and he's like i think you're good little hangnail there but besides that i'd get on and he goes thank you we check you for gout before you come in. That's your ticket. If you get 20, if you got gout and can prove it, 20% off.

Get that negative gout test to get in. Get a negative gout test to get in. You could have a serpentarium where there's always a crocodile that gets out. Yeah.

Oh, man. You could have a, that'd be pretty good if you have a theme park based on jokes. This could be, what if we do it? I got a long way to go

some tigers but if you can if I can start and call it Nate Land is good yep already got a head start on it

got a head start could be where Arpryland is Bulldoze Arpry Mills out there yeah where you grew up

do Nate Land yeah it's all based on your comedy you'd have to have some awesome rides yeah but then like

a comedy comedy theme park where you have comedy shows, doing my dad magic, make him do four shows a day. Just put him to work. I'll just make him to work. How much do you get paid? Nothing. You get 20% off of your food.

That's better than a lot of clubs. That's what I'm going to make him do for making us not be able to eat in the park. He goes, well, can I buy food? It costs more. You got to go eat in your car like you made us do when we were children. And that's a ride. It's people just go follow my dad out and have to eat the car with him. That's a ride. People just go follow my dad out and have to eat the car with him.

That's a ride. Yeah. That's one of the rides. Then he leaves the car door open. Yeah, yeah. The entire time. And the food, everything's hot. Yeah.

I had a dog get loose at Opryland. Yeah, you told that story. Yeah. And I forgot what happened, though. It was okay? I think so. Yeah, they found him. He was pretty upset.

The family was not thrilled. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's funny. It could be like people could, yeah. What is some fun Nate Land rides? I think it's more. Yeah.

We could do a Krispy Kreme challenge. Yeah. Oh, dude. That would be like it's more. Yeah. We could do a Krispy Kreme challenge. Yeah. Oh, dude. That would be like the Nathan's hot dog thing. Yeah. They could do it like once a year we do the Krispy Kreme challenge. That's our big weekend for us. Yeah, for sure.

That's a big weekend. July 4th weekend typically. Yeah. Yeah. And we do Krispy Kreme. It's going to happen. Dead horse. Just dead horses laying around. Yeah. That's a game. it's gonna happen dead horse just dead horse

just laying around yeah that's a game you gotta guess which one's dead which one's awake yeah but they're all dead

that's right the hard part is four of them will be dead and then the one you go well that one's alive it's walking around

I know it's pretty tough to get him to lay down to be honest the game would go better if he would lay down but the fact that he gets up and walks it's walking around you i know it's pretty tough to get him to lay down to be honest uh the game would go better if he would lay down but he the fact that he gets up and walks it's dead giveaway yeah and they're like well the other one's asleep you're like no no they're dead you could make it like some like in uh one of the games yeah yeah a dead or yeah you have some time travel time travel rides yep yep there's all of stuff. There's a mountain that you have to climb, maybe. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. Mount Rainier. Yeah. But they give you stuff you have to carry. It's a ride. They give you, yeah. Mount Rainier would be, oh, yeah. Just walking up a big mountain.

You got to leave everything down. You get up there, there's babies up there. Yeah. There's babies up there throwing wood. Yep. Yeah. We ran out of stuff pretty quick. Just going through.

Gotta go through every joke. But you went out to everything to be every joke. But yeah. I'll make my own Dollywood. Nate Lane. She did it.

Uh-huh. Yeah. Why can't a comedian do it? She was the only one on this. I said seven out of the top eight were either Universal or Disney. She was the only one.

Dollywood was number six. Wow. That's pretty good. Yeah. What was the list? Just readllywood was number six. Wow. That's pretty good. Yeah. What was the list? Just read through them. Just speak on here. All right.

So. You read two. All right. Got a top 10 list. Here's the first two. Then we're going to move on. I think I read three. Well, usually I feel like I get bored with when I start listening to these things.

Well, then maybe just do five. Universal Studios Florida is number four. Yeah. It's got the Simpsons and Harry Potter. Yeah. Universal Studios. Cla, then maybe just do five. Universal Studios Florida is number four. Yeah. Let's get the Simpsons and Harry Potter. Yeah. Universal Studios. Claustrophobia.

Oh, that one? Yeah. No, that's a riot at Nightland. They just trap you in this box. Claustrophobia. It just gets smaller and smaller and you see how long you can last. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. People leave with real traumatic. You leave with real problems. Yeah. We get you .25 Xanax as you walk out

get you addicted to we're run by Big Farm Big Medicine what are they called? Big Pharma Big Pharma that's who sponsored it

Big Pharma well we got a Big Pharma section we're brought in by all the big stuff Big Pharma Big Farm it could be a ride

where you just unpack a Helix mattress. Yeah, just watch it. Yeah, Walmart stuff. Yeah, there's a lot there. Yeah. Number five, Universal Studios Hollywood. I haven't been to any of it. Dollywood, six.

Disneyland in Anaheim, seven. How about Twitty City in Hendersonville? Is that on there? It is not. I looked up Twitty City, though. I used to drive by Twitty City all the time. It was a baseball team. Twitty City was a – all my friends played for Twitty City.

They had a baseball league there? Yeah, it was like a – we're all really good. I think it was kind of a traveling kind of thing. But it's such a good name, Twitty City. Yeah, it's great. And that was – I mean, now it's Huckabee Studios. Oh, that's where he does his show? Yep.

But it was just kind of like Lifestyle of the Rich and the Famous. You just drive through and see where Conway Twitty's, all this stuff was. No rides. No. Yeah. Nothing like that. It's a neighborhood. With a catchy name.

Aaron might not know what a theme park is. No, I looked it up, Aaron. Because I wasn't sure either. Silver Dollar City in Branson, number nine. Pressure started at ten, huh? Disney Adventure Park, number ten. This is the Avengers. I don't even know how to give charts out.

All right. What have you been waiting on? Top theme parks start number one and then you get is this just in america yeah yeah i really didn't think you would want to hear more than a couple so that's why i started at the top but number 10 did the adventure park uh june 4th which is what next week? Yeah. Coming up. The Avengers campus opens. It's like a new section there. It's supposed to be

really big. Wow. So and then it gets sent Sponsored for. Use code Nate when you go just when you go

buy tickets for it just as you go in go Nateland podcast and then they make sure they charge you more Kentucky

Kingdom in Louisville is number 21 do you have all right you have them all I have 25 I'm not going to read them but I thought yeah I thought you might

be interesting Kentucky King going to yeah is Kings Island on there yeah no it's not Cedar Points number 24 cedar points got the highest roller coasters yeah i thought that'd be higher because they uh they're pretty proud of what they got yeah yeah i think 24 i don't know what i mean that's just one not too great just one thing well i'd take it as gospel yeah for sure uh so at Kings Island, they have a ride called the Racer.

Yeah. And it kind of helped put roller coasters back on the map. I guess roller coasters were big back in the 30s and 40s. Then they kind of went away. A bunch of people died probably. And then in the 70s, an episode of the Brady Bunch, they went to Kings Island and rolled the Racer. I thought this was the step-by-step

roller coaster. Yeah, I've done this roller coaster. Yeah, and you race, which is the theme of it. It's called the racer. How do you determine, how do you affect how fast you go? Do you just lean forward? It's just red and blue and they're just racing. I mean, I think

it's just the general idea that you're on a roller coaster. Is it not a tie every time, though? I don't think so. Probably not. I'm sure it's just different. I'm sure it's like you have more weight or more whatever. Okay. You don't lean forward.

Yeah, I don't think it's like a big. I don't think anybody cares. You're just on a roller coaster. Yeah. Kings Island is where we would go. Kings Island is a cool part yeah this guy don hellbig um has set all kinds of record kennis world records for roller coasters they finally hired him as the public relations manager at king's island

that's a good move he's uh rode the racer over 12 000 times wow. Wow. I mean, how do you even have... I mean... He was working for the Cincinnati... Do you know how many times 12,000 is? Yeah, 12,000. Yeah. For sure, dude. It's a lot. It's a lot of times.

He was working for the... I like that. Yeah. That fist bump, you didn't care for that one? He doesn't know when to do them. Trying to give you one in there. One last fist bump of freedom before you get your life snatched from you. I mean, 12,000 is kind of insane.

How long is this roller coaster? It's like probably 90 seconds. That's about right. That one said watch three. The video unit says three minutes. But say it's a minute. Yeah, 12,000 minutes. How long is that?

This guy, he worked for the Cincinnati Reds and Major League Baseball won a strike in 81, so he just started riding roller coasters. And he set the single-day record with 97 rides in one day. And then he broke his own record with 111 rides. And now it's currently 112. By him? Yeah.

Yeah. Wow. I wonder if that's all you can jam in. I don't know. That's 8.8 and a third days of riding on that thing. Of the minutes. Yeah. You got to be just going straight for eight days.

200 hours. Straight. 200 hours. Yeah. So it's 200 hours. So if you go do it, well, if you go, if they ever let you just stay on, I mean, you would have to go every day. Yeah. If you go every day, it's open you go, if they ever let you just stay on, I mean, you would have to go every day. Yeah.

If you go every day, it's open, and you ride it. Non-stop. Non-stop. Wow. But, yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, you know, I mean, I guess it's cool. Like, it's like, you do all of that for him to go,

I've got the world record for most roller coasters in one day. And someone goes, oh, it's crazy, dude. Cool, man. Yeah. Yeah. It's cool, man. Because I rode the racer over 12,000 times. They're like, where is it at?

Kings Island? He goes, I don't know if I've heard. Yeah, might have. Is that in the top 25? No, it's not. Oh, it's not? Okay. He goes, yeah, you can't. might have is that in the top 25 no it's not no it's not okay he goes yeah

you can't he goes hey Disney ain't gonna let you ride something 12,000 times you know what I mean there's a little more rules there you gotta

King's Island it's a little dicey where you get you can tip the kid to go like let me go five times yeah I'll just stay in it I'll just stay in it

and he goes yeah absolutely I gave him 20 bucks let me ride it for three months straight that's what you can't you can't go do that at Disneyland? No. You think at SeaWorld they're going to let you just get in there?

No. You got to go to a little dicier place. Where you go, can I touch Shamu? They go, absolutely, dude. Whatever. Get in there, dude. I don't care about this job. Yeah.

Are y'all water park guys? I used to be. Yeah. You might be getting back to it maybe yeah maybe one day yeah we used to do our family reunion in evansville indiana in a part of this complex and it had like batting cages and mini golf and all this kind of stuff but there was a huge water park that was a part of it i used to to love that thing, dude. Slides and all these crazy rides are probably so dangerous looking back. Yeah.

Well, bumper cars, you ever done bumper cars on the water? Yeah. Bumper. You're just like inhaling gas. We call it bumper boats. Bumper boats.

Yeah. It's pretty common. I had, I've never done it. There's one at, uh, Opry mills that they've, uh,

no, that putt putt course the grand ole opry miniature course bumper boats there all right bumper boats i'm not saying it cracked the top 25 list of places but i mean they're everywhere it was a fun you've never seen bumper boats i'd not run off hand now dude i mean i've seen i mean maybe i have yeah well then yeah there's take these little rides there you go yeah they're pretty fun did you do like nashville shores and wait i mean you described it as you were describing bumper boat like you were like it's like bumper cars but on water i didn't remember the term that

it was called but you know that's yeah we thought it was special dude if for you well it is special it is special my uh my buddy jake gullage he uh i don't know if you guys ever met him he's a big guy probably six three at least 350 yeah there was a new water park opening in north carolina He took his son, like maybe the first week they were open. His son, probably nine, adopted, so he doesn't have Jake's frame. He's a very, probably weighs 60 pounds maybe. They have this water slide that you go down where you ride a, I don't know, some type of float or something. Yeah.

You go down, and then you go down in the water. They came down this slide. And he had so much weight in the back. And this little son in the front. When they hit the water, it skipped. Because Jake was waiting down in the back. It skipped all the way across the water, out of the water, across the pavement, and crashed into a fence right next to the road.

Yeah. He almost went in the road. Yeah. If it wasn't for that fence, he would have been next to the road. Yeah. He almost went in the road. Yeah. If it wasn't for that fence, he would have been on I-40. Yeah. And, you know, he was banged up. The wave pool, wave country or whatever? This was a brand new water park,

and they probably never tested someone that size with someone in front of him that little. Yeah. And the velocity just caught it, and he skipped all the way across and left the premises. Yeah. Kept going through the premises. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kept going through the pavement. Did he have to show his ticket to get back in?

They paid his medical bills for him. I mean, they freaked out. Was he that hurt? He was pretty banged up. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Was his kid all right?

His kid was fine. He said he kind of turned at the last minute to protect his kid from hitting the fence, but he took it head on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of stuff that happens. I mean, they have lifeguards and stuff. I think if you're.

We can't stop that. No. You know. You always make sure somebody bigger than you is doing it first. It's a good rule of thumb. Yeah. You never want to be the biggest guy. Now you've got a lot of options.

Yeah. The new Aaron. You never want to be the biggest guy going down. Yeah. Did it take you a while to find that guy the older did right not anymore you guys down y'all go ahead i know you've been over for like four hours you guys no there's a guy he'll come he's coming i'm waiting for him and then we just see you behind a guy that's just gigantic and then you're like you're you're just in the thing you're like one skinny person in

between that guy and that's how we know it's aaron's turn to go just this he weighs 450 and you're finally behind him you're just scoping out the bottom of the slide just waiting to see cannonball nice big one come down and you go, all right, I'll ride it. Yeah, pretty much. Another thing I read on the Reddit was about Disney World. They let cats roam. Have you heard this? During the night?

Feral cats. Once they close up the park at night, roam all through it. For rats? Yeah. I mean, at first they just were there, and then they decided to keep them because they control the rat population. So there's like 50 of them that just roam the park at night. How do they keep them out during the day?

Are they nocturnal? People do say they see them some, but I think they usually just sleep during the day and stay away from people. Yeah, and a lot of people. Yeah. So it's probably too much for them. I don't know if I've ever seen a wild rat somewhere. I know New York, they're everywhere.

I don't think I've ever just seen a rat in the wild. New York is wild, dude. Yeah. I mean, yeah, they're everywhere. Aren't they huge? They're huge. One of my first jokes when I started comedy was about we lived in Chicago, and they would be in Chicago.

And so they just knocked a building down next to our building, and we called it the dugout, and it was a little basement apartment, me and Michael. There would be a rat. The rats would – because they just went inside something. So they knocked this building down, So they all came into our apartment. And, dude, you would hear them. And they were – I mean, dude, it was the worst.

What would you hear them like walking around? Oh, yeah, dude. Like get something out of the refrigerator. I mean, they're just – I mean, they're – You just make yourself some help. You put the TV on. You're like, oh, God, he's watching West Wing. And then he's – he turns it up.

They can't hear as good as you think. And they're – but they – dude, they would be so big. And we were coming from here. I'd never seen stuff like that. And, I mean, we had like where our water heater was, was this little – like what's the folding door that folds, you know like like a closet door that you fold out and so they would push that door open are you because they would but the water heater was like kind of had like behind the water heater was almost like just like a crawl space and so

they'd be there and they'd come in the house and they would just push they'd come through the door i mean you have to push the door open like it, it's like that big. I remember I heard one time one under my bed. Like, you could just, I'm asleep at night and you just hear, like, and it's there. And you're like, it's just under the bed. Yeah, what do you do at that point? I mean, it just, you know, that almost be enough to make you quit comedy.

Just go, I don't want to do this. Laura came and stayed with uh when she came up to visit uh we i remember one day she goes she's you know we're trying not to bring up we're like we're like hey don't bring up that we have at rats living with us yeah and i mean they dude he'd bring uh bring – they brought these mouse traps, these rat traps. They're huge to get this rat. So one day one of them gets it.

We hear it. And so Michael runs in there, and Michael's like, we got a broom. And he's trying to get it, and he's trying to sweep it over, and the rat's not really on it. And then it goes, and he's still alive. And dude, I mean, Michael just jerks back and just breaks the door.

So now the, the, the whole part of the front door is, was like broken. Cause it was like, we thought this rat was dead and it's not. Cause you got to just get up there. Like what happens when you get it?

You're like, well, you got to get it out. Like, you know? So Laura, I remember Laura came over and Laura's in the bathroom, like getting ready.

We're about to go out and I'm sitting in the living room and a rat just runs from my bedroom to Michael's bedroom and then I just shut Michael's door like left it in there because I was like she was there and I didn't want her to know yeah oh there's a rat like you know to be like do you see them a lot you're like I see them yeah all the time They seem pretty comfortable in the place, too. Oh, yeah, yeah. Opening doors. Opening doors.

I mean, dude, it was terrible. Terrible. Gosh. That does sound terrible. Yeah. So there's been a lot. Another ride at Nate Land. Yeah, that's good.

Yeah, yeah. Take you to the whole haunted house. There's been a lot of rides where people have uh you know been injured or something one of the most famous was fabio when i think he opened this new ride so this was in i think virginia and um yeah i'm losing it here but uh it's called a ride's called apollo's chariot and it's got a Greek god theme. Fabio, he has the look, the hair, and the muscles. Looks like a Greek god.

They brought him in to the bush gardens with women dressed in white robes to be like his goddesses. This is not even when it hasn't opened yet. This is the test. This is media day. All the media is waiting at the end of the ride

and Fabio with all his beautiful women are supposed to ride this thing and then you may have to skip ahead

a little bit but he hits a, yeah, right there I guess. Right there's when it's gone bad

on the first turn. He's a goose with his face. Yeah. Breaks his nose. Kills the goose. Yeah. How crazy is that? Now, this is where all the media is just waiting.

Like, oh, my gosh, how fun was it? How was it? And he comes right in there. With blood all over his face. The women next to him aren't smiling anymore. That's who I'm telling about. That's amazing. You don't see the goose hidden.

No. But he's, man, that's crazy. What was Fabio, by the way? He was like a male model, and he was in some commercials and did a little acting. Did they have books about him? Oh, yeah. He was on the cover of romance novels.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's famous enough to have a ride after him, huh? Not named after him. He was just. No, they just chose him. They chose him. Oh, I thought yeah. He's famous enough to have a ride after him, huh? Not named after him. He was just – No, they just chose him. They chose him.

Oh, I thought this was the Fabio ride. He's got to be the most famous like – That guy? Yeah. How old is he now? He's 62. Wow. Yeah, he's –

You had that in the holster, dude. Yeah. Finally. Last night I was like, I wonder how old Fabio is. Finally, I came through. The Bryantown podcast has been studying. He's my favorite male model. Yeah.

In my top 25. Yeah, he's top 25 for sure. I mean, he got super, super famous off just really his looks. I don't know if I can name another male model. Not like him. I mean, I don't know if I can name him. Marky Mark, but he became something else, obviously.

Cindy Crawford is even, like, female models? Yeah. I mean, Cindy Crawford, I guess there's a lot more. But I feel like he was a little bit like Jose Canseco. He was almost more of a joke than what he was, right? I don't know. How is Jose Canseco a joke?

I mean, I think when the ball bounced off Jose Canseco's head, he was already considered like a dumb guy. And like, it would just be. But they were the Bash brothers. I mean, they were, they were. You're talking more about his mayoral campaign for Cape River, where he ran. Yeah, like maybe after the, yeah.

After his career. They were the Bash brothers. That was like the top, the biggest thing on earth. Yeah. All right. I mean, that's a bad example. Maybe now, though. I mean, Jose Canseco.

Now? Yeah. Yeah. But I just remember when the ball bounced off his head, people were like, of course it'd be Jose Canseco. Oh, right. And Fabio was a guy that everybody just kind of made fun of, I feel like. Richard Simmons, he's another one of my favorites.

He's my top 25. Simmons he's another one of my favorites he's my top 25 we stayed uh when I would taped uh the stand-ups uh on Netflix we got an Airbnb and it was like me Dan Soder Mike Vecchione and uh where we rented this Airbnb it was next door to Richard Simmons house and this was Richard Simmons he might still be was not coming out of his house. He was missing for a while. Like MIA. Yeah, he was just locked in his house. Oh, is that where he would

end up being? Yeah, but we stayed in the house next door to it. We never saw him. We did look. I mean, I don't think we could really see like his gate or anything.

Look at that. He came back during the quarantine, but he was gone for six years. He did his own quarantine. That's funny. He goes, all right, I'm coming back. No, I actually need to go back in the house. Like that's how many.

He goes, all right, been inside for six years. I'm starting new. What do we do today? They go, we need you to head right back in that house for one more year. I mean, that's it... How crazy is that? I'm back! Get back inside. Get back inside.

Back inside now! Back away from the car! Adam Racer. Have you done the Pirates of the Caribbean ride? I don't know. That's in Disneyland? Yeah, I think so. I don't know That's in Disneyland? Yeah, I think so I don't know

How do I not remember this? I don't remember that unique of an experience To go, have I been on a pirate ship before? Is it a pirate ship? Well, I was just going to say Sometimes, especially if we're promoting a new movie Johnny Depp will show up And play it, the character himself

I think I sent you a video of him. Oh, that's pretty cool. Oh, okay. Sorry. So, I mean, so he freezes like he's, I guess like a mannequin or whatever. And then when they get close, they realize it's really him.

Oh, wow. You may, again, have to skip ahead a little bit, but yeah. Fast forward. you may again have to skip ahead a little bit but yeah fast forward so it's one of these rides where like you go through a cave on a little boat and it's all wax figurines but it's actually johnny depp yeah yeah i think it's yeah yeah I think it's yeah that's cool yeah yeah that's awesome

yeah and then he's done it for Alice in Wonderland as well they said oh yeah he seems like fun my dad did a show once for

I think Johnny Depp's kid yeah yeah met him he came to the Magic Castle in LA and did a show yeah I think Johnny Depp's kid. Yeah? Yeah. Met him. He came to the Magic Castle in LA. Okay. And did a show, yeah.

That's cool. Yeah. He was just in the crowd, or was he? I think his kid was there or something. There was a reason for that. There was something like that. I don't know. It's not like he was there, and I don't know if it was like, you know.

He's kind of his own kind of dude. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I bet. Yeah. Yeah. The World's Fair, we talked about that a little bit they've had some crazy stuff up with worlds for the 1893 world's fair in chicago there was a serial killer on the loose and they just didn't tell anybody

another ride on the nate land we uh i mean that's that's and that's a ride that you don't have to I mean, that's a ride that you don't have to. He goes, so what do you want me to do? He goes, just do you, dude. Do you. Yeah, this guy killed a bunch of people in Chicago that year. They just kept it quiet. Did he have a name?

Yeah, H.H. Holmes. Oh, I've heard of him. He took them to the murder castle. That's what they called it. Why didn't they search there first? Where should we look? Yeah. What about the murder castle? You go, don't be ridiculous, dude.

Come on, dude. That's the first thing. It's not going to be that obvious. Yeah, it's not going to be that obvious. And then two days before the World's Fair was to close. Let's go to I swear I'm not there castle. That's where we're going to go. Two days before it closed, the mayor of Chicago got murdered,

got assassinated. So they ended the closing ceremony. They had all kinds of problems with this World's Fair. So they go to Knoxville because Knoxville goes, hey, we're a little bit calmer down here. All right, I'll give you the sun sphere. Yeah. All these things debuted at all these war.

It's kind of like a consumer electronic show for today or something like that. Like a big science fair. So Chicago World Fair happened, and a mayor was killed and an active serial killer was walking around. Was on the loose. And was he killing people at the World Fair?

They think he lured some people away, yeah. Yeah. He's responsible for dozens of deaths in Chicago. And they just... I mean, can you imagine? I mean, the whole park could sue him. Yeah, away, yeah. Yeah. He's responsible for dozens of deaths in Chicago. And they just, I mean, can you imagine? I mean, the whole park could sue him. Yeah. I mean, Babe Ruth. I mean, I just don't, you know, but you could just sue. Like, you could go, they go, yeah, what's your complaint?

I mean, starters, I didn't care for the food. But besides that, I would just say the fact that you let a serial killer walk around and they go, okay, that's a good complaint. That is fair. That is fair. Yeah. Well, it was one of the calmer weekends in Chicago, actually. Yeah. It was actually pretty nice.

The Valentine's Day massacre, that probably happened. Yeah, a few years later. Yeah. A lot going on in Chicago at that point. H.H. Holmes killed some estimate over 200 people. Yeah, that's total. He was getting busy. He traveled around.

Don't be ridiculous. Not that weekend. Give me a break. This is like the guy that rode the racer. He's like, well, no, I didn't do it all in one day. It takes a long time. 200.

Is he the biggest ever? I don't know. Could it be that they let him roam for so long? Could that be how he, apparently no one was trying to catch him? He died at 34. So, I don't know. I mean 30 so the place

he was taking him was the World's Fair Hotel informally called the Murder Castle oh because of him yeah oh he was taking him to the World's Fair Hotel

he was the subject of 50 lawsuits in Chicago alone so there you go Nate yeah he was sued or sued over 50 times. It's so funny. Besides being a serial killer, Holmes was also a con artist.

Yeah, I assume he lied about some stuff. Other than being a serial killer, he's a pretty straight up dude. Like if you asked him, did you kill this? He would have said, yeah. Yeah, I mean, you just couldn't probably catch these guys. Like, how could you? You have to basically watch them do it. He confessed to 27.

They said they think he did 200? They think he did over 200, some estimate. How could you do 200? It's like that guy on the racer add up how long that would take I mean longer than the racer yeah 200

are guns even like around wow I wonder how he and then it's like he died at 34 so he probably got caught right he was just hitting a stride 33, 32 so when did he start when he was so he probably got caught. Right, he was just hitting a stride. At 33, 32. Coming into his prime. So when did he start?

When he was seven? He was a prodigy. 1891 was he started. So he started, he was, okay. He was young. He got after it early. You know? I mentioned last week, President McKinley,

he was the one that had the thing that was lapel, and he gave it to a little girl and then he got shot. That was at a World's Fair. Oh, yeah. At the World's Fair in Buffalo. And they have all these- Maybe this is why the World's Fair stopped.

Maybe. I mean, I didn't know. We think it's like, oh, no one even wants to see that stuff anymore. You're like, no, no. Everybody was getting murdered at these World's Fairs. We can't do them because many people died. You know, they have all these things like the telephone, television all this stuff displayed at a world's fair like it's kind of like where

you see it before it comes to the public at this world's fair where mckinley was shot the x-ray machine was on display and someone suggested that we use this to try to find the bullet this is different than the springs from last week but they just weren't up to speed on it they're like i just don't know we don't know what kind of how it'll work so they didn't use it but they couldn't find the other bullet and he died and lighting yeah he did die lighting was just invented electric light bulb and they had thousands of light bulbs outside the building but none inside where they were working on him so they had to use a pan to reflect sunlight onto the operating table and they had to operate right there.

Yeah. And he died there. I think he died a few days later, but they had to remove the bullet right then. Yeah. And they have an x-ray machine and lights. They put the lights outside by the sun. So no one ever just said, well, you can't really see it. They go, yeah, I mean, we didn't even think about it.

Can you imagine being the person that has to hold the pan to like reflect all right keep it still right there right there you're in my eyes yeah and then donna you just see someone with a big hat he's like i think it's over this way like he blocks it all he's like now we're gonna meet and he's just in the way can you imagine being at the world's fair that's what's so crazy it's like so you're there you're at another part of the section and then you go you know they just did surgery where everybody could watch on the president of the united states and you're like where is that at because what were you doing because i was watching some show watching some of these three

legged man yeah i went on i went i wanted like it starts on this bearded woman for quite a bit see what she was about you ever talk to her and he's like no i was watching the president yeah of the united states president have uh open heart surgery in the dark in the dark that's what i was doing he goes again they'll ask you have you ever talked to a bearded woman? The bearded lady. She's got some stories. Yeah. I told her what was happening, and she goes, been there, done that, is what she said.

That's what she said. I go, I hear the president is having open-heart surgery, and we can watch, and it's free, no tickets. And she goes, trust me, it's going to be a waste of time she was i didn't vote for that guy anyway so at the 1982 world's fair in knoxville oh a couple of things that came out cherry coke wow that was the big around. Tide has turned on your feelings of Knoxville World Fair. I'm saying, who loses light bulbs when Cherry Coke is still around? And the touchscreen. Wow.

Wow. What was the touchscreen back then? The iPhone. Well, it was the same thing where you can touch a screen and drag it. Yeah, I know what it is conceptually, but what was using a touchscreen in 1982? I think you deal with Cherry Coke more than touchscreen. So it's... I had a Cherry Coke this morning.

Cherry Coke Zero. Cherry Coke Zero. You answered your flip phone and said hello i've had cherry coke zero i know that's pretty pretty spot on oh that's great oh Knoxville Fair gets its revenge. What were they touching? I think it was just some big TV screen thing. Yeah, and stuff moved. It was some medical equipment back then, right? Yeah.

Maybe. I guess Disney has a water park as well. Have you been to that? I don't know. They tell the... I don't remember these landmark things have you seen the statue of liberty i can't where is it at i don't know if i've done these things they told all the employees in character you have to stay in character in the water goofy they told

if you drown start to drown we cannot remove your costume because it will upset the children. So we cannot perform CPR on you until the lifeguards carry you away. Wow. When was this? I mean, this is one of those Reddit confessions of Disneyland employees. Who knows if it's true? Yeah, that stuff, though. You're going...

I mean, you hope that's not true. I find it hard to believe that push comes to shove. You're going to let this guy die. I'll do a couple more. Wilson County. I've looked at those princesses. They are unbelievable. They do such a good job.

The princesses. I think they appreciate what they do. I would hope. That's the thing that Disney does so good. You don't feel like they're annoyed that they're there like they they truly give every kid it's uh it's time it's i mean it's it's a pretty special uh is it super competitive i bet to get some of those roles yeah i mean i i'd imagine i mean i think it's a good i don't i don't i'd imagine i mean i think it's a good i don't i don't know at all but i'd imagine it's a good job if you got i mean do you when you go walk through there these uh i mean i would always say if you ever want to feel what it would be like

to be a beetle yeah go do go be a disney princess because you it's a it's a you get mobbed they can't even walk they can't even like kind of poke themselves out like it's just everybody's like yeah it just goes over to them so they they can't just walk around like you know they have to come out somebody's always gonna be standing near them and i mean if you're elsa and anna and you know uh uh what's the one laura harper likes the one with the long hair uh rapunzel like that was rapunzel was a big one that she loved and meredith meredith janet yeah uh yeah uh we go i'd always be like let's go see jimbo he's just a guy a buddy of mine used to work there. I told her it was a character. I go, it's an older movie. And he goes, it's about a janitor.

But you would go, they'd be very like, they have to kind of stay protected. Like, they're in an air-conditioned thing. But yeah, if you're like an older princess, I guess, where no one cares about you, princess. They just throw you out in the middle of the 140 degrees and you gotta go walk around just getting mobbed you know what are you people just asking you i don't know what's in what's a good old princess that's like you're like one of the stepsisters of cinderella you just gotta go out and tell me where the bathroom is like it's just

like no one cares you just yo where's the john and she's like it's over there that's how I had to weren't they called the ugly stepsisters oh yeah it's not I mean talk about the yeah

you go in there wanting to be Cinderella and they go you're talking about the stepsister talking about the ugly you go in there wanting to be cinderella and they go you're talking about the stepsister talking about the ugly steps yeah oh yeah that's what i thought that's what you were asking for i think you're and i'll be honest with you that might be a stretch i don't know if you looked in the i don't know if you looked in the mirror sweetheart but mirror mirror on the wall mirror on the wall uh we might have to do something a little costume you ever thought about Goofy

and she goes Goofy can be fun she goes just a heads up you have a heart attack or anything we leave you to die just so go ahead

if you want to ride you're basically signing you're basically going off to war you get hit by a car good luck you're on your own you're on your own man you're like a navy seal you're like that's how they i mean like the c like those cis i've watched them i'm reading

a book about that uh like these contractors like these kind of all these guys are cia contractors like they tell like you're like there's no backup there's no you're on your own something happens to you yeah there's no bringing in the cavalry no bringing the cavalry yeah and that is goofy goofy is that in disney world dude goofy is that level of a thing they tell goofy every day when you walk out there once you go through that door you're alone we don't come after you we don't come back for you don't ever let anybody know and then they have a pill they have to eat with just some fat kid sitting on his chest going goofy are you okay goofy and he's got a nightmare disney world though one of the best places ever been to uh all right that's it right can be good can be yep uh yeah that's enough everybody Everybody gets it.

Miami Improv. You guys, how was Fallon? Oh, it was awesome. O'Fallon was awesome. A lot of listeners for the podcast were there. One of them gave me a nice wedding card for me and my fiance. People are very cool. And then a lot of them said they're coming to see you, Brian.

So get out to O'Fallon. O'Fallon, Missouri. O'Fallon, Missouri. Yeah, that's awesome. You anywhere this weekend get out to O'Fallon O'Fallon Missouri O'Fallon Missouri yeah that's awesome you anywhere this weekend uh gotta think about it didn't you

yeah I did think about it yeah Omaha headlining a rehearsal dinner oh yeah this is the weekend this is the way

we'll be there yeah I get back that day we'll come to the way that morning yeah it's not gonna be like a whole thing right

uh it's gonna be wait in and out right it's gonna be yeah we're in a good table though when we come to the wedding. That morning? Yeah. It's not going to be like a whole thing, right? Wait, in and out, right? Yeah. We're in a good table, though. Yeah, you got a great table. You got a great table. Yeah. Yeah.

That's good. Yeah, Lucy was your fiancee. She changed. She dyed her hair. Did she change her hair, get a new haircut or something? Did you know that? She did something. Oh, you're not supposed to say?

No, no, no. I thought she didn't want to. I'm trying to remember exactly. I thought she was trying to get out of this. That's what I told her. As she changed it, I go, Lucy's not handling it. I go, Lucy, you can still get out of this. I told her the same thing I tell you. Y'all don't have to go through this, all right?

You can back out. Y'all can back out. Yeah. Usually you tell that just to the man. And I felt that he changed it to the woman. I go, hey,. Yeah. Usually you tell that just to the man. And I felt that he changed to the woman. I go, hey, Lucy, what are you doing here? Uh-huh. No.

Y'all are great together. Yeah. And I'm excited. We're pumped. Congratulations. Yeah, it will be a good time. Going to meet the whole Weber family. Yeah, they're all going to be there.

Yeah. Yeah. Amen. Oh, man. What do y'all do? Is the ceremony in Latin? Are you even going to understand it? Is your Purdue brother going to sit with us?

There might be some black. Where do you put your black brother? Bo. Bo. I guess we'll obviously see him. All right. Nate Land Podcast. Thank you guys so much.

We'll see you next week. Thanks, everybody, for listening to the Nate Land Podcast. Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify, wherever you listen to your podcasts. And please remember to leave us a rating or comment. Nate Land is produced by me, Nate Bargetti, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovation Consulting in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.