The Nateland Podcast - #83 Regional Differences

Starting point is 00:00:00 If it's a flat or a squeal, a wobble or peel, your tread's worn down or you need a new wheel, wherever you go, you can get a pro at Tread Experts. For exceptional traction on snow and ice, trust Continental Tires Viking Contact 7 tire. And right now, get a $100 rebate with select Continental Tires. Find a Continental Tread Experts dealer near you at treadexperts.ca slash locations. From tires to auto repair, we're always there at treadexperts.ca slash locations. From tires to auto repair, we're always there, treadexperts.ca. Hello folks, welcome to the Nate Land Podcast. Welcome folks. Hello folks, welcome to the Nate Land Podcast. Welcome folks, hello folks.

Starting point is 00:00:47 I'm Nate Bargetti, Brian Bates, Aaron Weber. Welcome, you know, this is it. Aaron, you were it. Yeah, man. It felt good, honestly. Yeah, we just lost him as an ad. They, what did you, yeah. We didn't sign as an ad. What did you?

Starting point is 00:01:07 Yeah. We didn't sign up for this. They just crumbled it up, and they go, who is that? You're putting an ad on Aaron Lamb? They dropped us weeks ago. We're just letting you read it. Yeah. Make you feel good.

Starting point is 00:01:22 We're just giving you something, you know? It contributes something. Well, I appreciate it, guys. Yeah. Yeah. Welcome, everybody. We're just giving you something you know it contributes something well i appreciate it guys yeah no uh yeah welcome everybody we're uh we're back here we're in it doing it trying to think i mean i guess we have yeah i was on the road everybody's on the road no i was at nissan stadium oh yeah titans man it's pretty frustrating. They all hurt, but this one really hurt. This really hurt. I was trying to think about, I was almost thinking, well, if I was a Packers fan, it would hurt worse. I was trying to make myself feel better. And you're like, well, if you're the Packers, I mean, that's brutal.

Starting point is 00:02:00 Brutal. Because you don't know if he's even coming back, Aaron Rodgers. So I was like trying to be like well at least yeah we're one less than that of but we but I mean we it's it's it's tough it hurts I try to tell myself that too I've had season tickets ever since they've been there yeah and I think this is our last year oh yeah just because I'm on the road so much I miss a lot of games now we're having a baby when i am home i probably shouldn't be at a game yeah you're getting sworn by fans at your seats like it's become a big problem those seats going there be one notice when those pop

Starting point is 00:02:33 you know and those pop open i got a lot of who days comments yeah to me and stuff from people either fans or people just messing with me yeah i. I don't really like that. Yeah. The Bengals. Kind of mean. Yeah. I mean, it's, yeah, there was a, I saw some, I got some of those. I mean, it was, it was crazy. The playoffs were unreal.

Starting point is 00:02:53 Yesterday was, I mean, two of the greatest games I've ever seen in my life. Every game was great. Every game was unreal. Uh-huh. The first three all ended the exact same way. Yeah. Four seconds left. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:03:04 Full goal to end the game. Can I ask you all? I have a sports theory question. Icing a kicker. Everybody does it. Happened in the Titans game. Icing a kicker. There's a last second field goal.

Starting point is 00:03:15 You call a timeout, evidently just to get in their head and make them think about it. But it happens so often now. Couldn't you ice the kicker by not icing them? Do you know what I mean? If you're expecting a timeout. Yeah, I agree. I think you would do that.

Starting point is 00:03:30 But didn't the Titans have one timeout left? So in a way, they kind of maybe did do that. He's thinking, are they going to call it or not? I don't think you can call back-to-back timeouts like that, though. Oh, I thought you could. I think mentally, they're not children out there and they're uh it's a professional i agree and that but i mean i agree that you could try to mix something up and be like all right what if we do what if we don't i do think that

Starting point is 00:03:55 but it's you know but i also think they can they know how to focus especially that guy is so good that guy's unbelievable the bangles kicker Yeah. There's a lot of talk now about the overtime rule after the way the Bills game ended. I threw this out on social media a few weeks ago. No one replied. No one cared. But now I'm throwing it to you guys. There's 10 minutes in an NFL overtime

Starting point is 00:04:17 game. What happens if a team puts together a 10-minute drive that ends in a field goal with no time left? What do you do then? I don't know. I think that's a ball game, right? The other team.

Starting point is 00:04:30 Probably, because it's the end of the game. So if you took the time away. Yeah, but the rule is, if you only kick a field goal, the other team gets a possession. You're guaranteed another possession. So they get an untimed possession, maybe? Yeah. But then that's, even untimed doesn't seem fair. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:04:43 Yeah, then they have an advantage. Interesting. I don't know then they have an advantage. Interesting. I don't know. The Titans had a – I could see why you didn't get a lot of responses the first time. Yeah. The Titans had a over 10-minute drive earlier this season that ended in a field goal.

Starting point is 00:04:57 Oh, okay. During the game. So it's possible. Yeah. I mean, it rarely happens, but it does happen. Yeah. I don't know. It's for an NFL podcast.

Starting point is 00:05:08 I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. I don't even know where to go after that, you know? Well, it hurt. Yeah. You didn't look it up to see? I tried to, and I couldn't find it. Are you talking about the overtime thing? Yeah. You didn't look it up to see? I tried to, and I couldn't find it.

Starting point is 00:05:26 Are you talking about the overtime thing? Yeah. And I tweeted it to a couple of Titan sports writers, and they never replied. Yeah. I don't think anyone knows. Yeah. No one wants to answer it. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:05:35 I've stopped everyone. Yeah. That is true. What if you found something that no one knows? You found a loophole. Yeah. You found a loophole that Roger DeGelde is like, we got to shut this guy up.

Starting point is 00:05:44 You know? I just disappeared. Yeah. Yeah. Like loophole that Roger DeGelda is like, we got to shut this guy up, you know? I just disappeared. Yeah, yeah. Like Newman with that bucket over my head. Yeah, yeah. Don't ask these questions. You already got your Preds. You see you already switched.

Starting point is 00:05:53 I've already got to move on. Yeah. I was like, because I already prepared to wear my new Titans. Yeah. And I was like, all right. Yeah. Got to wear Preds. Got to wear Preds now.

Starting point is 00:06:01 When we were leaving the stadium, somebody started chanting, let's go Predators. Yeah. Yeah, that's funny. Yeah. Yeah. Preds are doing When we were leaving the stadium, somebody started chanting, let's go Predators. Yeah, yeah, that's funny. Yeah, yeah. Preds are doing great.

Starting point is 00:06:08 Yeah. Gotta be fun. Yeah. Well, I hope, if you're a Bengals fan, then congratulations. I am pulling for the

Starting point is 00:06:15 Bengals now. I have a hard, I don't know who, I wanted Tom Brady to kind of ride in here. I was like, that was brutal. So,

Starting point is 00:06:24 but that's gone. And so, yeah, I don't know. I don't, that was brutal. So that's gone. And so, yeah, I don't know. I don't mind Matthew Stafford. I kind of root for him a little bit. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I try to think like who. It's not as like crazy.

Starting point is 00:06:38 You have close friends, Dan Soder, 49ers. Yeah, I have Niners with Soder. Eric Stonestreet. Eric Stonestreet, Chiefs. Chiefs are winning, though. They're dominant, so it's hard to kind of be like – it's hard to – when your team's not in, it's hard to throw to your buddy's team that's like,

Starting point is 00:06:52 well, you're the best team. I agree. So Soder with the Niners. I know how excited he was. So that's very cool. So I'm rooting for him. I just hope the games are good. That's how I feel.

Starting point is 00:07:09 There's a tremendous amount of relief now. I can just enjoy the games. Yeah. Everyone says the winner of the Bills Chiefs will kill the Bengals, and maybe that'll happen, but if you're a Bengals fan, that game, Bills Chiefs, is exactly what you want. Yeah. Just knockout, dragout, overtime's Chiefs, exactly what you want. Yeah. Just knockout, dragout, overtime.

Starting point is 00:07:27 Everyone's calling it the greatest game ever. It's almost like a Super Bowl. And then, you know, now they've got to regroup. Yeah, I mean, it was an unbelievable. I mean, watching it, like, you just couldn't even. I don't know. It's the craziest game I've ever seen. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:07:42 Yeah. All right. Sports section. We'll be right back I've ever seen. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Sports section. We'll be right back with – that's what we kept doing. Mike Vecchione, Greg Stone, they have a podcast, Macaroni Rascals, I believe. Yeah. But I think it's Greg on their podcast, so we would do it on the bus. It's very funny.

Starting point is 00:08:00 He goes, all right, we'll be back with Third Eye Blind. But he'd do it like if anybody's saying anything. just go like oh that's interesting all right everybody we'll be right back with third eye blind or something like that uh it was fun here on the bus uh sam hoffman the smartest guy on the podcast thinks corn grows on trees. The nicest comedian in the world relentlessly makes fun of Brent's health and well-being. Brent gives all the listeners information on viewing an asteroid that had passed before the podcast even aired. Everyone decides that now, 82 weeks in,

Starting point is 00:08:40 is a good time to switch up the format of the podcast to change the structure to aimless rambling and then complaining about the aimless rambling. And then top it all off, make it a story about a story that someone else told about Leonardo DiCaprio on a different podcast. What a show, folks.

Starting point is 00:08:55 That is when you break it down like that. And I mean, I just went in, I just did something that was else on another podcast. Well, we're back to the old format, so I hope you're happy. That didn't last long. It's a very good summary. In my head, it made sense.

Starting point is 00:09:08 It was like, I think universe scared me for some reason, the universe episode. Like, it felt very like, what are we doing? It was literally the broadest topic possible. The broadest. And then maybe I don't want everybody to know how dumb I am. So it's like, sometimes you're like, well. That cat might be out of that bag.

Starting point is 00:09:27 Yeah. It could be. But we're back. We're back. We're back, folks. Back to 82 weeks in. You know? You just always see what happens.

Starting point is 00:09:39 That's why you're never going to get here. Someone suggested that. They're like, change the format every week. Yeah. We just like to watch the training. yeah yeah silver hair thrifter i am canadian and it's pronounced toque as in fluke toque fluke a toque is something else involving cannabis we really double down on freaking canadians out first we call it a toboggan, and they lost their mind. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:10:06 And then we try to correct it and call it toke. I don't know if we've ever gotten more comments from people letting us know. Yeah, toke. Toke. Now, in my defense, I even looked this up ahead of time. I went to Merriam-Webster Dictionary online, and they pronounced it toke. Yeah. But I guess that's one of the things that's changed.

Starting point is 00:10:24 Well, what do they know? You know? a dictionary it's spelled they don't do canadas do they do just america's dictionary does canada have its own maybe is maria is it who is the yeah is that a person i think it's probably two. Yeah. Merriam and Webster? I think so. Yeah, Daniel Webster is one guy. I know that's a real person. I don't know who Merriam is. And they made the...

Starting point is 00:10:50 Could you look that up? They just decided they just got together. And they said, I'm going to do a dictionary. Like, it is. Like, who... Who decides it? It's all arbitrary. It's Canada.

Starting point is 00:10:58 Like, well, we got our own, you know? I'm sure they got tired by the time they got to Toke. They go, I don't care. I bet I could see them both in there. And he goes, all right, we're on. He goes, all right, T-O-Q-E. He's writing the dictionary down. He goes, the Webster, he goes, what are you going to say?

Starting point is 00:11:14 He goes, I don't toke. I don't, how long is this? He goes, well, we're only on T. We have a lot left. They're having to do it every word. And then maybe he said said you sure it's not toke he goes i don't i don't care at all at this point we're the t's we're in the t's toke put whatever you want he goes all right man you want to call a canadian and he goes i don't i'm not i

Starting point is 00:11:38 don't want anybody involved i don't i should never agree to this are we making money from this or like i don't even we it was fun when we're on c yeah this is ridiculous yeah it was founded by uh george mariam back in 1831 he's like let's get a dictionary going no one needed to imagine just you can't tell if it's like his life that easy you know his life that not easy uncomplicated that when you got ideas you go you know what we should put all the words together in a book and someone goes that's a good idea nobody ever thought to do no one ever thought to put all the words in a book like now you're you got to think of like the craziest stuff in the world to be different. And then it was like, what if we did, what if we just said all the words?

Starting point is 00:12:30 And you have to define them, each one. Yeah. What does that mean? What does that mean? Yeah. How do they do it? I guess they just. They take turns.

Starting point is 00:12:39 Yeah. Your turn, Webster. Yeah, how would they have done it? Yeah, so Webster, this is Noah Webster. My bad, not Daniel Webster. I imagine they're in the same family, though. He learned 26 languages. He hoped to standardize American speech since Americans in different parts of the country use somewhat different vocabularies and spelled, pronounced, and used words differently. So I imagine this was a nightmare.

Starting point is 00:13:01 Every part of the country spelling words different. And he's like, let's just all get on the same page here. And this guy kind of came in. We just went with this guy. Now, a chef's hat is also spelled T-O-Q-U-E. And I think that is pronounced toke. A chef's hat in Canada or here? Well, I thought everywhere, but here.

Starting point is 00:13:21 So it was spelled T-O-Q-U-E. And in my head, I think that could be toke or it can be toque. And I should have known, since it's Canadian, it would be the more ridiculous sounding of the two. So my bad. Well, that'll help. A lot of people tried to explain it to us by saying it's like two with a K on the end. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:13:41 So I so wanted just to mess with them one more week. Okay, so it's 2K. 2K. They just call it 2K the whole show. NBA 2K. So it's Tuk. Webster, Miriam. Yeah, I mean, there's no other dictionary either, is there?

Starting point is 00:13:57 I think there are some others. This is the gold standard, though. Yeah. I mean, you can just make your own. If there's others, then we'll do a Nate Land dictionary. We can. Just copy, straight up copy that. What's stopping us?

Starting point is 00:14:09 I don't know. Let's do it. We just have our own. So what's Britannica? Is that encyclopedias? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they bought Merriam-Webster.

Starting point is 00:14:17 They own it. Oh, they do? Yeah, they have a monopoly on knowledge. Oh. And then they were like, well, what do you do? They go, we talk about them. We just talk about them we just talk about stuff a lot longer is that what they said like they go you go you like say what a boat is

Starting point is 00:14:31 we're like we got a story about a boat we dive in we die yeah we get it's a whole thing you're like oh okay that's cool man that's that's all they're at the head is, right? That's an encyclopedia. It's a little bit longer, drawn out dictionary. They get into it. They get into it. Yeah, it explains what things are. Yeah. All right.

Starting point is 00:14:55 Travis White. The fact that Aaron said Tony Robbins instead of Tim Robbins as the actor in Shawshank Redemption is absolutely phenomenal. Could you imagine what a different movie that would have been if Tony Robbins was cast in that movie? Wow. Wow. It would have been somehow even more inspirational. I didn't even care because that was the first one you mentioned of people you wanted to meet.

Starting point is 00:15:14 So I really just thought you were a big Tony Robbins fan. I think I thought you – I was thinking Tony Robbins when you said it. Yeah. And then I just never paid attention after that. Because you said Tony Robbins. I heard you were Shawshank and I didn't like – Yeah, I did too. You said Tony Robbins, Morgan said it. Yeah. And then I just never paid attention after that. Because you said Tony Robbins. I heard you with Shawshank and I didn't like. Yeah, I did too. You said Tony Robbins, Morgan Freeman, and then the warden.

Starting point is 00:15:30 Right. And I'm just, I didn't catch all you were trying to say Tim Robbins. Well, those are, in fairness, those are the only two Robbins ever. So it's a pretty easy mix up, I think. Marty Robbins. You should say, no, that's what I meant. I meant Tony Robbins and Morgan Freeman. And then Morgan and Tim show up and you go, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Starting point is 00:15:47 No, no, no, no. I wanted Tony. Yeah. And they go, are you sure? I mean, we thought for sure you just messed up. And you go, I said Tony Robbins, didn't I? The warden can stay. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:15:57 Bob Gunton. Another one that people get furious, never seen Shawshank. Yeah. Yeah, we've talked about that. Oh, yeah. All right. Still haven't I need to watch it

Starting point is 00:16:07 I'll watch it I'll watch it in one of my night movies Yeah I'm going back to Sopranos right now Started doing that again You can read the book Shawshank Redemption book Oh

Starting point is 00:16:19 It's a novella It's like 30 pages You can knock it out Really? Yeah What's a novella? Like a short novel stephen king stephen king put out of four novellas at once it was stand by me was one of them

Starting point is 00:16:32 shawshank redemption was another one and there are two other that have been made in the movies too and they weren't horror either because most of these are horror no somebody was like i read somewhere somebody was like you can only write horror horror books and he was like no i can do other stuff and he wrote those which are like two of the greatest movies ever yeah came out of it pretty crazy why don't they just do more books like that if it works out so well short books i mean yeah i mean it's 50 it's going to be the greatest thing that people talk about for the history of ever. So why would they not just be like, I mean, we've got a pretty good thing going here with these short books.

Starting point is 00:17:11 Yeah. Put out four and two of them could be great. Yeah. Instead of one long, boring one. Drags on and on. Ross Christensen. Oh, there you go. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:17:23 You're proud of yourself. Well, I stopped. I stopped and looked around before I got to the end of yourself. I stopped. I stopped and looked around before I got to the end of that. Can we officially drop Aaron's moniker as the smart one? He had to ask Beanstalk what blood pressure is, and he had no idea that corn is harvested completely with the stalk. He also referred to the Phil of Dreams town as Dyersburg instead of Dyersville. There's a helpful saying in the Midwest,

Starting point is 00:17:49 a good corn crop should be knee-high by the 4th of July. This is likely why they play the Field of Dreams game in August. Not in February. Yeah, see, this is one of those things, Ross. I feel like, you know, you're talking a lot of smack here, but if Ross were cornered and somebody said, what is blood pressure, do you think this guy could explain very well what blood pressure is? You go, pressure of the blood. And then I would think the person asking would go, okay, I guess that's right.

Starting point is 00:18:12 It's kind of what happened last week. Yeah. You asked me? I think that blood pressure probably feels like one that you just say the word back to them, and then they go, yeah, like I said. Kind of self-descriptive, I guess. You know, you press the blood. It's the pressure of the blood-descriptive, I guess. You know, you press the blood. It's the blood.

Starting point is 00:18:25 It's the pressure of the blood. And then you go, okay. Also, corn, not a big part of my life. You know, it's just- But a lot of people point out you went to Notre Dame, you drove past it. We didn't have corn at Notre Dame, you know? To even get to Notre Dame, I just think you would know stuff like this, though. Did you always just fly there?

Starting point is 00:18:43 No, I drove there every time. Is it there and back what if it's because you're you just come from such a like high net family that y'all don't even yeah y'all would never even talk about like what the people right the people are the ones that do in the corner that's what the peasants are doing peasants are doing you're eating you're like i don't i've never i'm sorry i've never seen it grown. I can tell you, you know. It gets brought to my table by a servant. Yeah. Yeah, the Weber.

Starting point is 00:19:10 Filled. You have your own filled dreams. There's a helpful saying in the Midwest, a good corn crop. You're like, yeah, oh, well, my guy that worked for me, yeah, he loved that saying. I never heard it. Mandy McKnight. me yeah that he loved that saying i never i never heard it uh mandy mcknight if that was a competition to see who should read ads aaron came in first place lots of enthusiasm there we go yeah that feels good yeah good job congrats uh justin ratliff almost got choked at nate's reaction to

Starting point is 00:19:42 brian's talking about getting kicked at the water fountain. You could tell he thought everyone had the same experience growing up. I'm dying at the idea that the water fountain was like the Wild West for Brian. The Wild West for Brian. That is very, like, just, you just, like, you're holding off your thirst of going, like, I don't know if I should do it today. Someone pointed out that Gary Goldman has a joke in one of his specials about getting kicked at the water fountain oh really yeah yeah that's funny we're about the same age so i guess it was a

Starting point is 00:20:09 80s thing yeah y'all just got kicked you were just in the the last big run of water i guess that we i used water fountains a lot too but you were i could see when i was using water fountains i lot too, but you were, I could see when I was using water fountains, I could see them being on their way out. You were in the thick of it. Yeah. Well, I don't think water fountains are out. They're, I mean, no one's really using them now.

Starting point is 00:20:33 Yeah. They don't use them at schools? We're saying is y'all are probably impressed by the technology still. I think that's how y'all got water. I mean, you were getting it from a well. Like, I think it was like, yeah, it was like science. My family did. Yeah. Your family got water from a well?

Starting point is 00:20:48 We didn't have city water growing up. Are you kidding me? Out in the country. Yeah. And so we had a well. And sometimes, like in the summertime, if it was a real drought, we wouldn't flush every time. Oh, wow. Did you ever have to go out there and crank it up and get some water no i mean it it flowed just like normal through okay through your pipes but it came from a

Starting point is 00:21:10 well yeah and my mom would fill up water jugs at work of good drinking water yeah so we wouldn't have to drink yeah i mean yeah that's what you're definitely getting kicked at the water. I mean, like you're probably looking at it too long. You're so blown away by it. Fresh water. Like, mama, today at school, you turn this knob and this water comes out. I swear. I ain't never seen nothing like that. Look at this.

Starting point is 00:21:44 Izzy warts i now think they may have adhd not dyslexia oh man both oh i say this after him talking about the way he has trouble retaining what he sees in movies or shows as someone with adhd i started putting the pieces together from my own experiences particularly the way he will lose interest in lots of topics he's not directly interested in. But I think the way he talks could just be because his brain and mouth are not working at the same speed. It's something I experienced and was even sent to speech therapy for as a child.

Starting point is 00:22:18 Wow. Look at that. That could be. So now I have no dyslexia. Which would you rather it be if you had to pick? I don't know. Is it all just a wash now? Yeah, it's all. Maybe you have no dyslexia. Which would you rather it be if you had to pick? I don't know. Is it all just a wash now? Yeah, it's all-

Starting point is 00:22:27 Maybe you have seen Shawshank. Maybe. You watched it last night? Yeah. You know what's funny is I was with, I was talking about the ADHD with Julian McCullough, who's with me this week, who's with me this past weekend. But we were talking about it. It's like, yeah, it's like how you get –

Starting point is 00:22:48 it is like your brain's faster than you actually can say. So when I'm reading, I'm reading super fast within my mouth. I can see it. You start and stop a lot of sentences. Yeah. Because you're thinking ahead to the next thing, the next thing. Yeah. So what do you do? Nothing. Just deal with it. Well, you're a genius maybe. Yeah. So, cause you're thinking ahead to the next thing, the next thing. Yeah. So what do you do?

Starting point is 00:23:05 Nothing. Just deal with it. Well, you're a genius. Maybe, uh, maybe. Your mouth's not.

Starting point is 00:23:11 My mouth is like every day. It's like sits in the bed, just tired, just hoping just wants a break. And then I just lay in bed and can't go to sleep. My brain's like, I got a good idea. My mouth is like, go to bed.

Starting point is 00:23:29 I'm a family physician. Dr. Bernard Elpidis. Elpidis. Elpidis, maybe? Yeah. Elpidis. I'm a family physician. Triage is a medical term to assign urgency to patients.

Starting point is 00:23:42 For example, a patient with chest pain will take priority over a patient with a runny nose. I like that Nate thought it meant the third time coming in. That actually makes sense. Did I say that right? Yeah. Here we go again. Every time he comes in. Got a triage.

Starting point is 00:23:59 This guy won't leave. Jake Craft. I completely understand the level of anger nate felt while watching that hallmark movie i got so irrationally mad at nate's inability to understand the taco bell membership you would not be required to only order one taco at a time you would be able to go and add one free taco to whatever else you were ordering for instance i like to order number six with a large baja blast and also the free taco that my membership allows me to get. The way he is only able to understand this is I'm only allowed to order one taco is baffling to me.

Starting point is 00:24:30 I would expect more out of a fast food aficionado such as yourself. I think I gave up on some of those in the middle. Aficionado. Aficionado? Aficionado. Oh, that's right. Yeah, I think I kind of meant what he's saying maybe it wasn't coming out again i think we have adhd and not dyslexia we just found out

Starting point is 00:24:53 from izzy uh so i think i'm ahead of the game jake uh yeah i don't remember that being your understanding of it no i think, I think you got it. Yeah, it wasn't like you can go in. That would be very funny. It would be hilarious if you go, I'm starving. I would like one taco. Then you have to go stand at the end of the line. You come back, I'll take a number six with Baja Blast.

Starting point is 00:25:19 Like that would be, I would do it because that's hilarious. The Taco Bell made you do that. How much is a taco? I think it's got to be a dollar. A dollar. A dollar forty. If that. You'd have to eat ten. Ten times's got to be a dollar, a dollar, a dollar 40. If that. You'd have to eat 10. 10 times. 10 times. It makes, it's not a good, it's not a good system. I agree. That doesn't make sense. One free, you're, you're just, your time alone. I mean,

Starting point is 00:25:36 unless you are, you go, I eat Taco Bell every day and then it's going to save you. every day and then it's going to save you if you would have to get a free taco every day so 30 days you'd have to get a free taco and then it'd be where it'd save you 20 some dollars maybe 30 some dollars so would you pay the 30 bucks just to you know ten dollars a month yeah yeah so we have like yes you're saving 20. Yeah. 20 bucks. So, like, are you going to, is it worth saving 20 bucks to have to go eat taco to make sure, like. A couple of people suggested just buy one and give it to the homeless. And then every day they go in there and get a taco. That's not bad.

Starting point is 00:26:19 I don't think Taco Bell, that's what they're hoping for. No. That's a good idea. In your face, Taco Bell. Yeah. Here's a free, that's not a bad idea. Here you go. Here's what they're hoping for. No, but... In your face, Taco Bell. That's not a bad idea. Here you go. Here's a free thing. You can get free taco every day. One free taco. You're giving them a fishing pole

Starting point is 00:26:33 instead of a fish. That's right. I don't know how. Because you're not teaching them. That's what you're saying, right? That's what I'm saying. You're giving them a... I think you're doing the opposite. What are you talking about? i think you're doing the opposite what are you talking about i think getting them a job at talking bell would be the fishing pole i think

Starting point is 00:26:51 you're just getting them a free taco every day you're basically like come here every day i'll give you a fish you're giving them the means to have a meal every day that's what you're doing i know the one taco every day and it's not a good fishing pole, but it'll- That's not a fishing pole. I think it is, man. You're giving them the fish. I'm giving them a fish every day. Hey, come right here to this bank.

Starting point is 00:27:13 I catch fish every day. I'll give you a fish to eat. And then he goes, okay. And then the point of it is to be a fishing pole is like the means to like then go get- It's not like he goes, you know, I started getting this free taco. Now I work for Wall Street. And I really just snowballed from there like it wouldn't that's getting you know unless you go there so often that they're like what if you work here maybe that's the you know yeah taco bell goes you know i see you in here every day dorito locos taco and they're like

Starting point is 00:27:44 won't you just work for us And they're like Why would I I get free food I already have a fishing pole dude My employee discount is Not even as good as this But if he works there

Starting point is 00:27:55 Then he gets a job And he probably gets a free meal And then he goes When he gets his employee free meal I'll also take one extra taco That's a fishing pole The job The job Okay That's a fishing pole. The job. The job.

Starting point is 00:28:06 Okay. That's fair. Yeah. I want to give an update on another thing from last week. The woman on Jeopardy, she's now tied for second. Oh, nice. 38 wins. What's his name?

Starting point is 00:28:18 Ken Jennings, 74. But one of the previous winners wrote an op-ed this week, kind of controversial. Oh. He says you should go back to the old rules where after five wins, you're out. That was, I guess, the way they used to do it. Oh, really? Because, he says, it's such an unfair advantage once you're on there a few times to the winner

Starting point is 00:28:38 because you're really nervous the first time. You don't know how the buzzer works. He said it's just so much advantage once you've on the show a few times. It's not fair that somebody's been on there 30 times. Somebody else is on there the first time. So he thinks he needs to, after five weeks, move on. Let's get on. That's soft.

Starting point is 00:28:56 So what did Ken Jennings do? Did he have to leave? He didn't have to leave. He finally lost after 74 weeks. Yeah. So they're saying even like Ken Jennings shouldn't have that record. Yeah. The guy just said, once you get to a certain amount of wins, it's so unfair for that person

Starting point is 00:29:13 because they're so much more comfortable on set than the two people that the show would be better. He said, after five wins, let's just start over. That's just someone writing an article for nothing. I mean, like, it's just someone writing an article for nothing i mean like it's just yeah it's the only time anybody cares about jeopardy is when somebody's on a streak like this that's what we need to go back to like people making dictionaries like that was a time where like he was at least bringing like people just write stuff now that's like they write you know

Starting point is 00:29:40 like what are you i think this was in the atlantic but like why well the Lennox was very nice to me but they the nicest comedian and I'm making fun of them now well I didn't agree with that article either so

Starting point is 00:29:51 yeah I don't like anything the Atlantic wrote there but it's yeah I don't know it's it's like almost

Starting point is 00:30:00 you just yeah I don't I don't but anyway yeah she's halfway there To catch Ken Jennings Yeah

Starting point is 00:30:06 But he shouldn't be doing it Back to five wins Why would you write the article About Ken Jennings though Like why would you not I guess he didn't think about it I think they've had I think he was the first

Starting point is 00:30:14 Really streaky winner But now they've had A bunch of people That have won over Really long streaks And the guy who wrote it said Jeopardy's not as good this way Yeah but it doesn't

Starting point is 00:30:24 But I mean how many streaks Have we had And the fact that it's said, Jeopardy's not as good this way. Yeah, but it doesn't. But, I mean, how many streaks have we had in the fact that it's been – she's not – I mean, she's almost half or she's a little above half. She's at 38, so, yeah, she's basically at half. So, like, I mean, she's still got a long way to go. Yeah. So if they can't do it, then you're like, well – like, it would be one thing if it's all, like, 38, 40, and, like, everybody's kind of doing it. Other than that, you're like, well, like it would be one thing if they're, if it's all like 38, 40 and like, everybody's kind of doing it.

Starting point is 00:30:47 Other than that, they're like, people are not doing it. I think more people will watch a streak than they will go into watch jeopardy every day. Yeah. I think you're more, we're talking about jeopardy now versus if you don't have this happen,

Starting point is 00:30:58 you could be like, Oh, then I thought jeopardy was off the air. Didn't he die? Alex? Like, so who's doing it now? Ken Jennings

Starting point is 00:31:05 and Blossom because I can't ever say her name or like splitting it yeah okay so yeah you need this streak

Starting point is 00:31:12 you know if the show would be gone I think I think Jeopardy's been doing really well for a long time I don't think I need you to Alex Trebek

Starting point is 00:31:23 I know but Alex Trebek is the you know it's like these shows do well for a long time with like the they have a person there that's like been there forever like it's it's that's why they're you know what it is yeah it's the shows it's a simple idea you can have it on every day i'm not making fun of jeopardy yeah but i think the streak gets you talking about it i don't think we'd be talking about it. That's true. Yeah, we're saying they're doing it right. You know? I know, but you guys are saying that this show needs it.

Starting point is 00:31:50 And I'm like, well, Jeopardy's been doing pretty well for a long time. Because of things like this. Yeah. But they haven't been – I think the majority of Jeopardy's run probably has been five wins and you're out. But that was so long ago that Ken Jennings – I mean, how long ago was the Ken Jennings thing? 20 years ago 20 years ago close to it so for 20 years they haven't been doing it so i mean how long were they doing the five ways before 15 years like i mean yeah they probably done the other

Starting point is 00:32:14 way more than the like it's being like they've changed this rule for a reason and then now it's being like well now the second person it's like well what if we do go back to the old way the old way might be a year we did it like that yeah i think the guy who wrote the article was the one that had to get out after five weeks so maybe he's just bitter is it i think i don't i mean this is all this is all coming together you know i mean like you know i may be wrong about that but i I think he was. I mean, that's unbelievable if that's the case. He goes, why do you even care so much, man? He's like, well, I had to get off. And I don't think that was fair.

Starting point is 00:32:51 And you're like, oh. I'd still be on there. Yeah. 30 years later. You go, okay. Okay. Now we're getting, this, now the article makes complete sense. And I'm actually on board with this guy writing it.

Starting point is 00:33:02 All right. The long spring that's how do we even get into all that stuff after taco bell well i was updating stuff that i shared last oh yeah i was like trying to figure out where we were in the comments i'm like taco bell to jeopardy the long spring my sister got in trouble in elementary school for wearing a t-shirt that said i I'm from Dubuque, and I'll party till I puke. Dubuque, and I'll party till I puke. The teacher said that she was wearing a Saturday shirt and made her turn it inside out. A Saturday shirt.

Starting point is 00:33:35 I love that. It's a good way to describe it. But I love that they party so much in Dubuque. You're like, the shirt's fine. I'm from Dubuque. That's a Saturday. And I'll party till I puke. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:33:44 I could see it being a Saturday, you know. All right. Yeah, it's a weekend shirt. Yeah'm from Dubuque. That's a Saturday. And I'll party till I puke. Yeah. Very funny. I could see it being a Saturday. You know. All right. Yeah, it's a weekend shirt. Yeah. You can tell me. I just think it's a funny way for a teacher to describe it. I think it's about the best way you could say it.

Starting point is 00:33:54 I would think it's a teacher that's like, I get it. Yeah. And I'm not saying don't wear it, but. Listen, I got the same shirt at home. Yeah, I got the same shirt at home. This is Tuesday. This is Tuesday. It's not a Saturday shirt.

Starting point is 00:34:04 Yeah. Justin Schultz regional terms are interesting i moved one state over from minnesota to wisconsin when i was 14 i had to change pop to soda and drinking fountain to bubbler as as a 14 year old me needed to give my classmates more reasons to pick on me. I already had thick Coke bottle glasses. So, oh, yeah, because he's like, I need to change it or I'm going to get more made fun of. Yeah. Tracy Thielman. Thielman. Thielman.

Starting point is 00:34:37 T-H-E-I-L, man. I'm an English teacher in New York. And one of my favorite lessons is one I do on dialect as a literary technique. We go through color-coded maps about the different terms people use for various things throughout the country. Even within my class of small town central New York, students there are fun disagreements. When we get to bubbler versus water fountain, it always makes my 11th graders laugh. I can now add toboggan versus beanie to the list thanks for the laughs and smiles every week uh yeah yeah a lot of people people like to like the talk yeah which i think that's what we're talking about yep so there we go uh so this week uh yeah we were we're going to be talking about. Yep. Yes, sir. So there we go.

Starting point is 00:35:30 So this week, yeah, we're going to talk about people like- I'm going to take Canadian. Yeah. There you go. I mean, when did you think of that? Well, right now. You thought that joke right there or like how much longer before? While he was reading. Oh.

Starting point is 00:35:46 I was hoping it at least was right now now the fact that you said on it i liked it i'm gonna take american like i don't you know well canadian because we keep saying their words wrong yeah and they've been threatening us that's why i could just take the one that was a little scared of right now i'm scared of the canadians yeah okay all right all right back his way yeah it's a good joke in the 80s he still works now still relevant yeah the jerk store called nate they're running out of you uh so we are gonna talk about all right do you have those uh words oh yeah how do you pronounce oh. We've got them up here. I want to hear how you guys pronounce these four words on the screen.

Starting point is 00:36:29 Should we spell them for the listeners first? A-U-N-T. We'll just... Ant. Grocery. Caramel. Or caramel. No caramel.

Starting point is 00:36:39 Mayonnaise. All right. So three out of those four, you said them like most Southerners pronounce them. Yeah. One of those you did not. Which one do I think? Caramel? No, that's the way most Southerners say it.

Starting point is 00:36:53 Aunt? The South and Upper East Coast have three syllables in caramel. The rest of the country says caramel. Caramel? Two syllables. Caramel? Yeah. Oh.

Starting point is 00:37:03 Did you say those the same way? Ant, grocery, caramel, mayonnaise. So you said one of those different than him. Yeah. What was that? Caramel? The second one. Grocery.

Starting point is 00:37:15 Grocery. You said grocery. Grocery? Mm-hmm. It's a grocery store, right? Well, some parts of the country, like the, New England say grocery like you said it. Yeah. And we say it usually grocery.

Starting point is 00:37:29 Grocery? Yeah. Like CH? Or SH? SH. Grocery? The grocery store. Grocery store.

Starting point is 00:37:37 Grocery. Grocery. Yeah. Yeah. Mayonnaise. You said mayonnaise, right? It's a pretty good episode. I think it's good. It goes. It said mayonnaise, right? Good episode.

Starting point is 00:37:47 We're three minutes in. Wow. This is how I thought we could start it. Yeah. Uh, your first joke is like when you open with a, I don't want something that murders. All right.

Starting point is 00:37:59 All right. I'll do it. I thought this would be a good way to get into it. I may be wrong now. the South and mid Midwest say mayonnaise with two syllables. Mayonnaise? Mayonnaise? Yeah. But the West and Northeast say it with three syllables.

Starting point is 00:38:13 Mayonnaise. Mayonnaise. Mayonnaise. Mayonnaise. Say mayo. How do you say L-A-W-Y-E-R? L-A-W-Y. Lawyer. Is that how-W-Y Lawyer.

Starting point is 00:38:26 Is that what you say? Lawyer. Most of the country says lawyer. Lawyer? Yep. Well, that's why I say Laura. So Laura, a lot of people say Laura to her. It's Laura. L-A-U-R-A. It's still spelled Laura though, right?

Starting point is 00:38:42 Yeah, but she says it Laura. So a lot of people say Laura. It's Laura. There's an online test where you can, the New York Times has an online test where you can answer 25 questions and it will tell you what part of the country you're from. Yeah. And I did it.

Starting point is 00:38:58 It gives you three cities that you're probably from. It was Columbus, Georgia, Chattanooga, or Nashville. Oh, really? Wow. Ruth did it. Now, she lived the first 10oga, or Nashville. Oh, really? Wow. Ruth did it. Now, she lived the first 10 years of her life in Connecticut and Pennsylvania, the next 10 or 12 in California. Then she was in D.C. for eight, and now she's been in Nashville for like 12.

Starting point is 00:39:14 Yeah. So it was really confused about her. Yeah. But it still put her most likely in Northern California, which is where she went to college. She says stuff differently. She's educated. She is educated. She's college. She says stuff differently. Like, what do you call it? She's educated. She is educated.

Starting point is 00:39:27 So that probably, educated probably throws you out of the South. But she's lived in. Like, it's like if you go to, I would think, you know, like you, they're not going to be, they might, you say stuff proper. Like, you talk, you got to talk to people that like. Yeah, you're right. All right. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:39:46 I think I still, I think I'm still pretty Southern though, the way I speak sometimes. We'd have a well at my house growing up, but. Yeah. Yeah, there was one question I answered. You did, but y'all did a science project. To see how people look like a mission trip. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:40:03 Yeah, I went to Lebanon, Tennessee, and said, Sir, can I help you with some of that? You go, well, boy, come on over here. You said it like we say it. It's usually three syllables, Lebanon, but we say Lebanon. Lebanon. Yeah. What would you call the road that you drive?

Starting point is 00:40:20 What do you call I-40? Interstate. It's interstate. It's what the I stands for. Yep. But a lot of people like West Coast yeah freeway yeah but it's yeah freeway but it's so interstate i always hit that i'll change that that's the one that you change i'll sometimes change in my act if i think i'm i'll just say freeway for some reason i'll just think like well if it not that it really matters but if you're like if the joke doesn't really i

Starting point is 00:40:47 don't really care about that word and i just want to make sure you can picture what i'm picturing yeah so i'll say whatever word i need i need i want you to hear so if i think you think i think if you think freeway and i've actually thought about interstate and highway. I don't know if I even say freeway. I might say highway. Yeah. And then I'll think about that. I'm like, well, highway might be a smaller.

Starting point is 00:41:11 Technically, it is. Yeah. So then I'm like, so I need to probably go back to interstate. And I think I went back to interstate. But I'm just picking the word that when I'm just trying to make you picture it. So the word doesn't really matter. I just need you to. You're just just need you to you're just painting the picture i'm just painting the picture so whatever makes you you know it might not be the word that i say but whatever word helps this have you done a lot of stand-up in canada yeah yeah how much do you

Starting point is 00:41:38 have to none really i mean that's like everywhere i think that's the biggest mistake we make is to adjust if you're doing a show there and people there to see you they know like they're not dumb I mean, that's like everywhere. I think that's the biggest mistake we make is to adjust. If you're doing a show there and people are there to see you, they know, like, they're not dumb. People, like, get it. And it's not saying that everybody kind of has that feeling. I think there's a feeling with that everywhere. Everybody thinks everybody's dumb. So they think no one's going to know anything.

Starting point is 00:41:59 And I'm saying, I think Canada will feel that if they come here. We all, like, have that feeling. I think it's probably one of the big problems in the world right now is everybody assumes everybody except them is dumb yeah and you're going to go actually everybody's actually very very smart and people are not dumb and majority of the world we we can wrap our head around what's going on and so if I if I'm laughing at your jokes go and do your jokes I'm not I'm here I'm not going like what is that I don't know what is a Walmart you don't have like a gas station what's a gas station then you you have to walk out because you're like i didn't get any of them like if they're if they're there

Starting point is 00:42:34 just assume they're i i always assume my audience is smarter than me so i mean the only thing i could even where i if i'm doing anything is to make sure the picture gets painted so it could be i if i'm really trying to make you picture this in your head that's the only time i would it's like i'm not doing it because i and i have done it i'm not saying i'm like figured that out and it's hard not to want to do it but I you got to remind yourself you're there doing comedy they're not dumb my first time you're staying up in Canada I was freaking out about like saying washroom instead of bathroom yeah I was talking to this guy like are you they're like yeah we know what a bathroom is yeah you idiot yeah all right my bad yeah yeah I mean it's your first time going yeah I mean, honestly, I think everybody has this feeling.

Starting point is 00:43:27 I think everybody would. I mean, toboggan would obviously throw them off. That's a sled. Yes. Yes. So there's some things they would maybe totally. But I mean, yeah. So if you're going up there and you're a toboggan heavy comedian

Starting point is 00:43:44 and you're like, hey, my act is mainly toboggans. It's not whether you're dumb or smart. It's whether you're a comedian. If you want this to go good, I would say toque. If you want to have, he goes, I don't know. Toboggan works so good. He goes, do you want to sell them afterwards or not? If you're selling toboggans as merch, guys you want some toques some toques some toques leah says she used to work

Starting point is 00:44:13 as a comedian from california and she'd do shows in the south she's like guys where i'm from where's this thing called vegan yeah and she said she told her we know what vegans are in the south but she was from la or something she didn't she doesn't think we know what vegans are in the South. But she was from LA or something. She didn't think we didn't have them here. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, everybody thinks. That's so condescending.

Starting point is 00:44:32 Oh, well, I honestly think the only problem with the country in the world now is condescending, is that thing. People think they're smarter than they they think their friends, the people they're with, we're all cool, and then they think anybody outside of that, they're like, dude, they're like so dumb, and that's the number one problem with everything, so if you just, like, they assume everybody's dumb, like the vegan thing, they think the South, and this is me, I get a little defensive, but I think they have an image of the south that's not a good image and they uh you know people just come to the south and they'll be like what are y'all doing like someone that came which is funny that bb gun i

Starting point is 00:45:13 think i said that here but like guys like you're gonna see a lot of guns down there and you're like that's just like that's someone now 2021 that you're 22 that goes like well they got a lot of guns down there not saying that people do have guns down here but you're like i don't see guns i don't walk around and just see like it's the wild west but they in their head you're going to picture that and that's the problem with every like we all picture if you go to canada you're like what is it you know they're going to be everywhere they're going to you're going to think whatever you think of it and you want to go hey just assume everybody's as smart as you.

Starting point is 00:45:46 Just go ahead and assume that. That's what everybody should do. Every interaction you have, assume the person's smarter than you maybe. Just assume that. That would be a better – you have a better experience if I treat you with that than if I treat you dumb. And I think most people treat people dumb. And so if they feel they're being talked down to, that's the disconnect.

Starting point is 00:46:09 My audience is probably smarter. I mean, realistically, I get that I'm funnier or something, like I can be creative or whatever, but they are going to be smarter than me. Most of the people that come to these shows, I'm not going to be able to talk to them about like real stuff. Like I don't like they're super smart like they like real jobs and like they did stuff so it's like you you you

Starting point is 00:46:31 know you you treat everybody with just that you're smarter i don't think you ever have a problem with anybody yeah because you're at least showing them the respect right but we don't do that no one does that everybody goes well i'm just i'm the one i bet the other ones are dumb yeah i totally agree with that uh solo stuff we'll be right back solo stuff would you just ask i got my wife solo stuff for uh for valentine's day by the way oh yeah that's good fun little gift yeah you know you being sarcastic yeah you don't think that's romantic to have a little fire pit? Yeah. You can hang out by the fire pit?

Starting point is 00:47:06 Go out there and, hey, ma'am, hey, lady, for Valentine's Day, why don't you go out and start a fire? I'll go out there and start it. Yeah. You know? Yeah, it is. You know, I thought for Valentine's Day, what if you go outside and not be near me?

Starting point is 00:47:20 I bought you a fire so you'd be warm. I will say if you're trying to discreetly order a solo stove, it will show up in a huge box that says solo stove on the box. You might be able to click. Can you click something that says gift? I don't know. Maybe. I didn't do that.

Starting point is 00:47:36 What do you call the rubber sole shoes you go to the gym in? I say tennis shoes. Tennis shoes is what I've always called them. Never played tennis. Yeah. Most of the country does. my wife calls them sneakers yeah i think i've even started saying sneakers just because enough people that would be one that was like sometimes if i it's not like you're not too dumb to get it but if i felt you were going to ask about it then i would just do whatever to

Starting point is 00:48:00 you know if like i was like i went and bought some tennis shoes and i just don't want you to go what what i would just say i'll say whatever to stop the conversation because i'm talking to an idiot on the opposite of what i just said i tell you at these people i talk to i'll tell you what morons they are just dumb dumb dumb all right go ahead uh most of the country if if it's the sun's out when it's raining, most of the country don't have a word for that. When the sun's out when it's raining? Yeah.

Starting point is 00:48:30 Do you have a word for that, what you'd call that? When the sun's out and it's raining? Yeah. No. In parts of the northeast in Florida, they refer to it as a sun shower. Oh. In parts of Mississippi and Alabama, they call it the devil is beating his wife. Do they really?

Starting point is 00:48:45 Yeah, yeah. You know that term? I heard that growing up. If the sun's out and it's raining, yeah, the devil's beating his wife today. Was it when you were doing a Habitat for Humanity and that's where you heard it? You go, y'all drove down your mountain to talk to the regular folk? Devil's beating his wife. I heard teachers would use it, regular people.

Starting point is 00:49:07 In school? Oh, yeah. It was just an expression. Yeah. It doesn't happen that often. I mean, how often does this weather phenomenon happen? Well, enough's enough. Not that often, but enough for a term.

Starting point is 00:49:16 I think that's what a real abusive relationship is. Well, I mean, how often am I really hitting you? You go, I guess not every day. I mean, that's the saying. All right. And then the wife has to be like, I mean, I guess I can't complain about it. It's not every day. In Florida, it's every day.

Starting point is 00:49:34 I guess so. It rains in, I think, every day. They always say that they get just a hard shower at some point during the day, and they don't stop. But I've never heard. That's crazy. That seems like a lot. Like if someone said that, I would be like, what's that?

Starting point is 00:49:50 I don't, like weathermen aren't using this term, you know, on the news or anything. Well, it's in the education. The teachers are using it, the educators. Well, kids, the devil's beating his wife today. Yeah. Do you have any idea what it means or how that? I mean, I have an image of what it means. The devil beating his wife.

Starting point is 00:50:06 In reference to the weather? No, I have no idea. I have no idea where that comes from. I guess she's crying? The sun's burning on it? Maybe. I didn't dig into it like that, but yeah, that makes sense. I like it.

Starting point is 00:50:21 I'm going to start saying that again. Yeah, the devil's beating his wife. And we're a wife beater That's what the shirt is I bet a lot of people that say that have that shirt on And then there's just a lot of like Like you have to go And the guy walks out And the wife beater goes

Starting point is 00:50:42 The devil's beating his wife today And you're like Oh He goes, the guy walks out of the wife feeder and goes, the devil's beating his wife today. And you're like, oh. In New England, they call milkshakes frappies. Yeah, that doesn't make sense. No, I don't like that. Frappies? Yep.

Starting point is 00:50:57 I thought frappie was a coffee. I thought it was too. A milkshake to them is just milk and syrup until you add the ice cream. Until you add the ice cream. A milkshake to them is just milk and syrup until you add the ice cream until you add the milkshake to them is just milk and syrup yeah until you add the ice cream if it's not if and then becomes a frappy yeah which makes it a frappy that would be uh except in royal island where they call it a cabinet a cabinet because that's where the blender is kept that you make it that means you just call it whatever you wherever you keep the stuff at that's you the blender is kept that you make it. I mean, so you just call it whatever you – wherever you keep the stuff at?

Starting point is 00:51:26 That's – you know. I mean, everything could be a cabinet. Then you go, can I get a cabinet? Yeah, what do you want? I'll take a banana. Just keep – I know I keep bananas in the cabinet. That wasn't a good example. But would someone ever keep a banana?

Starting point is 00:51:40 That would be real weird. Keep a banana in the cabinet? If you went over to someone's house and you said, hey, can I have a banana? And you opened the cabinet and they gave you a banana, would be real weird if you went over to someone's house and you said hey can i have a banana and you opened the cabinet and they gave you a banana would you think you would say so you probably have to say something you keep bananas in that cabinet just leave them out on the counter huh yeah maybe it could be good for you to leave it why i don't know i just think why not you never think about it we talk about you know i put ketchup out and i start putting my bananas in my hot on my cabinet yeah yeah keep them fresh keep them fresh don't they say if you hang bananas they'll stay fresh longer i've heard that once you once you take one off

Starting point is 00:52:15 then it's over yeah the rest of them they start to ripen super quickly yeah once you break the seal you got like a i think seinfeld used to have a joke but they like some of the eating fruit but you have about an hour with the banana like you buy it it's like not good and then you have a window pretty quick it's pretty quick and i like bananas a lot but you gotta you gotta be all you gotta be thinking about them if you buy them because they go to bad i think you they gotta be on your mind the whole time you buy them. I think you got to just be, back of your head's got to be like. Banana. Banana.

Starting point is 00:52:49 Banana. Banana, banana, banana. Cabinet. That's crazy. You know what my mom used to do growing up? If she got something, a food from the store that she didn't want the kids to eat right away, she'd take a Sharpie and she'd write no on the box. So if you look through our cabinet it's just all kinds of stuff just no and we're trying to find something to eat no

Starting point is 00:53:10 she wants to save it it's a very funny thing to do yeah did you honor that request no i think me and my dad would disobey every now and then if i remember my dad once taking the box flipping it upside down he says on and then we'd just eat it from there. What was it? Like candy? If she's like, let's see, we got like Nilla wafers. She's like, I want to save these for school lunches. No. Yeah. Okay. That's funny. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:53:37 The cabinet thing is crazy. They call you in a cabinet a milkshake. I think they would even feel embarrassed about that. I'm not saying everyone in Rhode Island. That's just what the article says. Because they had some stuff here about Tennessee.

Starting point is 00:53:50 I'm like, nobody says that. Rhode Island does. How many Rhode Islands will fit in a cabinet? That's a good question. Do you say yard sale or garage sale? Garage sale. I say rummage sale. No, I don't.

Starting point is 00:54:06 Oh, that is what I... No, I don't. No, I don't. Rummage sale sounds like you'd be... Oh, you got a rummage sale going on? You're like, it's a little better than that, dude. Like it's, you know, I would be offended if someone... What is this, a rummage sale?

Starting point is 00:54:18 You're like, I don't know, dude. We're not doing that bad. I got some good stuff here, dude. Connecticut and Wisconsin call them tag sales or rummage sales. Tag sales. Tag sales. Most of the country calls it yard sale. No one says garage sale?

Starting point is 00:54:33 Some do, but most people in this part of the country call them yard sales. Oh, I would always say garage sale. Garage sale, too. I say yard sale. Huh? I always said yard sales, but I've heard both. I feel like you go to a lot of them, too, so you wouldn't know. You feel like a yard sale. I think you would be a yard sale guy.

Starting point is 00:54:49 Yeah? Yeah. Look at some old baseball cards. Yeah. Just showing up. I always feel embarrassed. It's always kind of like weird walking up. To a yard sale?

Starting point is 00:54:58 Yeah. You like park. Just call it a yard sale. I know, but I always feel a little weird. You're just walking into someone's yard. And start combing through their stuff and like you know

Starting point is 00:55:07 and you're like you feel like well I gotta talk to them it's like so personal it's not a store you're not like a target being like hey man

Starting point is 00:55:13 I'm just like you know it's like it's the guys these kids are running around like you know and you're like and you gotta and then you gotta

Starting point is 00:55:21 yeah you know I'll give you two dollars for it and you're like I know and I like2 for it. And you're like, yes. And I like the idea. I like the idea. $2, that's a good, that's a high price for a hat.

Starting point is 00:55:33 For a hat? Is that what you said? No, I just said $2. I don't know. Oh, I thought you said a hat. Yeah, most things are like 25 cents for a box. Box of stuff. Stuff, and you go through it and find what you want.

Starting point is 00:55:44 You just leave it there yeah big trucks that go across the interstate what do you call those big trucks yeah semi trucks

Starting point is 00:55:55 18 wheelers is what we always call them the south mostly calls them 18 wheelers westerners call them semi trucks northerners call them tractor trailers

Starting point is 00:56:04 see I think I have a mix of Louisville Kentucky 18-wheelers. Westerners call them semi-trucks. Northerners call them tractor-trailers. See, I think I have a mix of Louisville, Kentucky. Does Louisville consider itself the South? Or it's right on the cusp? I mean, I think they act like it. But they say, like, my mom says, for an hour, she'll say, Really?

Starting point is 00:56:24 We'll be back in an hour. Shower. We'll go take a shower in an hour. Like, it's like that an hour. She'll say hour. Really? We'll be back in an hour. Shower. We'll go take a shower in an hour. Like it's like that kind of. Sounds Irish. There's like a little, there's that kind of northern. Like Abigail says a little bit like that.

Starting point is 00:56:39 So I think we have, that's what my accent's always kind of weird. Like I have, my dad had a speech impediment. I didn't really get a fair shot coming out. I'm learning Louisville, Nashville. My dad has a speech impediment. My mom says iron washer, washer, washer.

Starting point is 00:57:03 You're lucky that I speak the language to your the fact that i make money speaking is unbelievable it's phenom level of the fact that i that i'm there's so many times but i sometimes when i am talking on stage i'm like i don't even know how people are like go like i there's times i'm like am i getting too i think i'm's too dumb. Or it's too, like, people are like, what? You are like – do you know who Wilma Rudolph was? She overcame polio to become an Olympic track star. Yeah. You're the same thing.

Starting point is 00:57:32 Yeah. You're a modern-day Wilma Rudolph. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's nice. Yeah. There – yeah. I mean, there's times in my act I'm like, I don't – man, are people just like – like, I i mean you're like you're like i think they're laughing like they got to be laughing just at you being like i don't know it's like a zoo animal it's like going to the zoo yeah

Starting point is 00:57:54 there's okay they go feed them in an hour i totally done that where i get a big laugh and i think like my zipper is undone or something oh yeah, yeah. It just felt. I check it. Yeah, so do I. I check it right when I walk out. As you're walking out? Yeah, I should check it before, but you do check it before, but then when you get there, you're like, let me make sure. You just do. You wave.

Starting point is 00:58:16 You're just going to touch the next two zips up and go about your day. Yeah. Mm-hmm. The South is the most religious part of the country probably no surprise there Vermont's the least religious state mm-hmm no surprise there yep only 42% of residents consider religious Mississippi the most religious made 85% in my cricket letter cricket letter a cricket letter could go to I come back home Becca there it is what I. There it is. What? I'll tell you, you would spell Mississippi.

Starting point is 00:58:46 M-I, Kruger letter, Kruger letter, I. Kruger letter, Kruger letter, I. Humpback, humpback, I. You learned that in school? Yep. Yep. That's how they taught us. And they said, the devil's beating his wife.

Starting point is 00:58:55 The devil's beating his wife. Maine is the youngest state in the U.S., average age 30.7. Oh, I thought it was like the youngest like the last one the last one I'm like oh good for 30.7 is the average age in Maine the median age

Starting point is 00:59:11 yeah wow that's crazy according to this which is Kohl's research Alaska's the highest Kohl's research

Starting point is 00:59:17 44.5 like the store wow our intern Kohl yeah the I would say Alaska I guess because you can't get out. It's like they're there, you're there.

Starting point is 00:59:29 You thought they'd be the oldest? No, I could see them being the oldest. Like, you're not going to be. I think if you're born in Alaska, and you have a greater chance of people don't leave, even though you think people would move away from Alaska, but I think they love it, and they're proud of it. And so the people that live there, yeah, they'll stay there forever.

Starting point is 00:59:48 I can see that. It's the most ownership you could have of a state. I feel like Hawaii, Alaska, Hawaii. Those are like you're your own thing. You're like, this is what I am, dude. The South has some of that, I think, too. Texas has a bunch of it. Texas has a lot of that.

Starting point is 01:00:06 South in general has a lot. Like, you're, you know, I definitely can feel, you know, I was, like, excited to move back home. Yeah. Like, you're just. But I think, but in New York, I guess everywhere does that. But I would think Alaska and Hawaii's got the most. Because they're just on their own.

Starting point is 01:00:19 But, yeah. New Yorkers, like, they want to go. I'm not, Julian, again, that we're talking about. We were talking about moving, like, moving back to New Jersey. He's from New Jersey or Philadelphia want to go. I'm not, Julian again, we were talking about moving, like moving back to New Jersey. He's from New Jersey or Philadelphia kind of area. But then New York and people just want to go back there. And it's always crazy to me when they think like,

Starting point is 01:00:35 gosh, I just want to go back to New York. It's like, it's great. You just walk around and go get whatever you want to go get. And you're like, well, that's all they know. That's what they love. They love that. And so it's like, yeah, I get it. But I would think Alaska and Hawaii has got to be the most.

Starting point is 01:00:49 You feel that way about Lebanon? You going to go back one day? I hope so. I'd like to. We've talked about soft drinks on here, what you call them, South Coke. Yeah. North and Midwest call it pop, and england and both coasts call it soda eastern massachusetts and part of maine call it tonic i've started saying soda more

Starting point is 01:01:12 but i would say coke it says that we say coke a lot of the south does yeah yeah i tonic and i was talking to my uncle the other day in Lebanon and he called I mean I'll hear he looks like a cold drink yeah

Starting point is 01:01:29 and we'll get me a cold drink yeah you ever heard that no I don't know were y'all talking on the phone do you have a

Starting point is 01:01:35 operator she goes Sarah can I talk to my uncle like I'm Mayberry Andy Griffith Sarah Sarah can you get my uncle on the phone

Starting point is 01:01:43 cold drink Sarah, can you get my uncle on the phone? He's having a cold drink. He's having a cold drink. He said he'll call you back. All right, Sarah. I think that's a very Southern thing. Cold drink. I hear some guys have cold beers.

Starting point is 01:01:58 That's what they say. Go ahead and have a few cold beers. I would say, I started saying soda, and I almost say soda now soda now i always said coke but then that was one that i it's not it's again i don't think i was i was like i was saying coke it's like i'm it was not enough people knew what that like and i get it because i'm and then i was like well i'll just say soda a lot of stuff i if you change it just for the jokes i'm trying to just make it as what's the easiest way to understand what I'm saying. Because I think if you said Coke on stage,

Starting point is 01:02:30 you would have to be a joke about it. Isn't that exactly opposite of what you just said? No, because it's not saying that they could get it. But Coke, if you're... I think they would get it, but it's like, do I want them to even have an ounce of confusion? Like if I don't want them to trail off at all, like I don't want your mind to go like, oh, I bet he means soda. Like I want you to be so into what I'm saying that I'm just going to say the thing that gets you there.

Starting point is 01:02:57 That's not saying that they're done. That's saying I don't want you to be distracted. It's just going to be distracted. It's going to be distraction. So that's not. Wouldn't you agree? No. That's crazy

Starting point is 01:03:05 it is exactly that if i don't want you to be distracted i'm just trying to get to the point well i mean i think that's opposite exactly what you said you're like you just say what you say people aren't dumb they're gonna get it no that's not there's a difference between being distracted is the difference going like do y'all know what a walmart is like it's like that's being dumb what are y'all in the South? Y'all just have guns. Everybody walk around. That's talking like they're dumb.

Starting point is 01:03:30 But if you're going like, I'm going to say soda, just so people don't. Everybody knows what soda is, and I don't want you to be distracted from the joke. That's how you make a joke really work. Just try it. In Saskatchewan, a hoodie is considered a bunny hug i mean yeah you knew that no but you say old uh old lady old man you hear people say that yeah yeah that could mean that could mean your dad or your like your spouse right yeah that's a little confusing old man yeah a lot of uh travis thinks his old man to his dad the old man's coming you know it's a little confusing old man yeah a lot of uh travis thinks his old man

Starting point is 01:04:05 to his dad the old man's coming you know it's a weird somewhat like i don't we never said that but then old lady i think it's funny to hear old lady i want you to be really country if you're saying old lady yeah i think i want you to you're i want you to you have a truck you have some land you live on a you know like you could survive on your own. You think that's a Southern thing? I think it is, but I want you to be like – you could live off the grid. If you can live off the grid, then I think you can say old lady. That's like the Duck Dynasty guy.

Starting point is 01:04:39 He called his wife Miss K. That's the most Southern thing I could think of. Yeah. But if you're something-huh but if you're something like that he if you're if you're like that i feel like someone's doing it and you're like you're not that southern like you know you're like you can't can live off the grid that's what i consider most most southern you're modernized southern y'all were close you i mean you kind of did because you're so far out yeah we um on that quiz I took the 25 question

Starting point is 01:05:07 quiz I lied about one I said what I've said all my life which is the last meal of the day is supper my mom considers the last meal of the day not dinner she calls it supper which we've heard that yeah she calls lunch dinner oh which I think more people I've never heard that i think that's just wrong right not to her yeah it's fun but it's it's lunch that's what it's called yeah well i don't know if it always has been all right in some parts of the world uh tipping in in japan tipping is considered rude because good service is standard and expected. Yeah. I mean, the tipping thing, I saw someone, it was just like one of those like some fact or something. Somewhere here in America, someone just said

Starting point is 01:05:51 they just paid the servers and stuff more money. Yeah, I mean, look, I mean, I worked on tips. Tips are great. Like that's how I got started. Like I'm not against tipping. But I also am not against like, if you just had it like, you know,

Starting point is 01:06:09 just standard or whatever, you know. Yeah. If they were just paid. Yeah. $10 an hour or whatever or more. Yeah. Or paid.

Starting point is 01:06:15 Yeah. Whatever it is, if they pay them and they should be like as much money as they could with tipping. And then they always make that money. And then that would be, and then, you know,

Starting point is 01:06:23 in Australia, there's a 10% goods and services tax on every bill, and that's kind of accepted. That is the tip. Yeah. Like you're paying it, but it's in the bill. Does that make sense? Yeah, I would almost, like I like that.

Starting point is 01:06:35 Like I like the idea of being like, you're like 20% added to everything. I'll play devil's advocate here. All right. Going to beat your wife? I'm going to beat advocate here. All right. Going to beat your wife? I'm going to beat my wife. All right. Could you argue that the quality of service will drop a little bit if I'm not working for tips anymore?

Starting point is 01:06:55 You could, but tipping's getting now. I feel like tipping is just like it's so standard that even if your service is bad, I think a lot of people still tip 20%. I don't think you're even – you don't make a point. It's not a statement anymore. It'd be insane. I mean, you would have to have a fight with the server for it to be zero, for you to go, I'm leaving nothing.

Starting point is 01:07:20 Like, it would have to be a knock-down, drag out fight i i've only time i've ever done it was with a cab driver once and we got in a huge fight because they in new york uh when you lived in queens if you got a cab from la guardia to go to queens they would be furious because they wanted they they send that long line to wait to go get a fare to new york so they and like i i understand it but it's like one of those that you're like, well, what do you want me to do? Do not go home. Cause LaGuardia is in Queens. Yeah. Okay. So it'd be very quick and easy. And like, so like the dude you would get in and I would get so self-conscious and embarrassed to be like, I'd almost want to go to New York just to

Starting point is 01:07:58 get in a subway and go home. Cause that was so like, you get in there, I'm going to Queens. And then he'd be like, and they would just be mad at you and they i mean one guy gets in an argument with me like because i live in queens and we got in a we ended up getting a huge and i got out and i was like i i tipped zero on that like and i and i showed him i was tipping zero like it was like it was i made it a whole point but it was it was but it ruined me where anytime I go now, I don't want to get in a cab unless I'm going to where I think they... New York got real bad with that for a while, where you get in cabs and if you were like,

Starting point is 01:08:33 even going home from New York, if you were like in Manhattan, you're like, I could go out to Queens. I mean, they'd drive away from you. You go, where are you going? Queens. They'd leave. They'd want to stay in the city. And I mean, I understand it, but you're like,

Starting point is 01:08:45 so now you're not, now your service is not even a thing. Like, yeah. And so then you would go to, and then you get to New York. That's why I'd like, you'd start to be like,

Starting point is 01:08:54 you'd want to like use a car service in Queens. I'd rather just use a car, like set up a car service. So they know where you're going. So they know where you're going ahead of time. So I don't get no, so there's not an argument. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:09:04 I mean, I would be very, I'm not always just like, would be very self'm not always just like be very self-conscious about like i know you could be like who care most people can be like who cares it's but i could never i was always like you know i've had uber drivers they'll counsel on you once they see where you're going because they want a long trip yeah want something short yeah i think it's the same reason, right? Yeah. Yeah. I find myself tipping now on stuff that I used to not tip on. Like if you're a self-service place and you're paying at the counter, but then they'll,

Starting point is 01:09:34 you're playing with the credit card. So they'll flip that thing over. Yeah. And in the past, if I pay with cash, I wouldn't have tipped, but now I feel obligated to. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:09:43 Yeah. I put a tip everywhere. You know what I mean? Yeah. A hundred percent. I don't think I do, but now I feel obligated to. Yeah. Yeah. I put a tip everywhere. You want to move? 100%. I don't think I do at the ice cream thing, which we've talked about that a long time ago, right? What? Like there's an ice cream place where you do it all yourself.

Starting point is 01:09:53 Oh, yeah. We have to. And they have a tip thing. And that's infuriating to me. I mean, infuriating. That's the only one that I'm like. And I get like, you know, I talk to Felix. He's like, it's just a kid.

Starting point is 01:10:05 Like it's not the kid's fault. It's this, it's the store's fault. That makes me mad. You're like, I'm literally doing, I'm getting it myself. You go around, you get the ice cream, you get all the toppings, whatever. I do everything cool until you, I think you're treating me dumb. Yeah. When you, when I feel like I'm, I'm getting your, you think I'm stupid.

Starting point is 01:10:23 Then I, that's my, I'll give you money. I don't, I'll get, I cannot feel any emotion to, I don't want to be mean to anybody. But if I think you think I'm stupid, in that point, you do. Because you go, I mean, I get the cup. I get, I do this. I do it. I do, all they do is flip the eye pattern. They could technically not just have it turned around. And I could put it on the scale and then be like it's like almost a checkout like

Starting point is 01:10:49 at the there's nothing that they do i guess they clean the machines but then you're like so why even have a business then so i like i guess we're all tipping the i gotta tip the guy he's gotta clean the bathroom like you know that's the only one that I... I get that. Punctuality. Some countries look at punctuality very different. In Germany, you're expected to arrive at least 10 minutes early for any scheduled meeting. If you show up on time, you're late.

Starting point is 01:11:18 But in Mexico, people usually show up 30 minutes late for scheduled meetings. In Brazil, it's impolite to arrive on time. I like that. That's whereolite to arrive on time. I like that. That's where Laura needs to move to Brazil, where it's just like, who do you think you are? You said it was 5 o'clock.

Starting point is 01:11:35 Is she late everywhere? She's late everywhere. Yeah. It's considered in Brazil impolite to arrive on time for social occasions due to the fact it's unlikely the host would even be ready to receive the guest. And if you are a scheduled appointment, you're required,

Starting point is 01:11:51 there's required to show up time. You're not required to show up on time unless you use the phrase English time, which means you're supposed to be there when it says, Oh, so they, yeah, they believe that if a person arrives late,

Starting point is 01:12:03 that means they're more successful than a person who shows up all the time because they got a lot going on. Yeah. That's the philosophy. Yeah. I mean, it's pretty true. Yeah. If you're going like wide open.

Starting point is 01:12:14 Yeah. I can see how you can develop a culture of that quickly. When I used to run a show, I think both of y'all did it at one point. I used to run a show at this like tiki bar in downtown Nashville. Next to the Satco? Yeah, right next to the Satco there. And we wanted to start at nine o'clock. And I want to be like, we'll start at nine.

Starting point is 01:12:33 And then like, if you don't, if you start at 930 once, everyone's like, oh, they don't start till 930. And you just can't, you can't get it back. Yeah. Every week I was like, we're starting promptly at nine. Like, come on. 920 people roll in. You would have to say 8 30 you have to say 8 30 you have to lie yeah yeah you have to go 8 30 and we start at nine but then you end up start showing up till you go well then i'm gonna show up at 9 30 and you give into the system and i go they're not

Starting point is 01:13:01 even gonna be there till i'll just show up late yeah yeah in morocco uh people show up anywhere from half hour late for personal appointments to the next day oh you're waiting for that guy yeah i mean that's i was like how you doing that's very funny the next day that's gotta be what a point like a dentist appointment? They call it Moroccan time. Yeah. You're like, I might be. It's half hour is like amazing. That's like a guy that's life is put together. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:13:32 And then the extreme is just the next day. And the fact they have to see you, they would be like, yeah, we got to let them. Your appointment was yesterday. Nah, they want to be rude. Yeah. And you're just like, yeah, I'm here. It's Moroccan time. That's great.

Starting point is 01:13:48 Different countries eat dinner different times. Spain's usually the latest. They start their meals anywhere from 10 to 11 o'clock. Oh, wow. Which I think they mentioned on the dinner party episode of The Office. Yeah. Didn't she say that? Oh, that's right.

Starting point is 01:14:02 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think she said midnight. And they think they do midnight and they did they think they do this because they changed their time zone during world war ii to sync up with the germans and they never change it back so people who used to eat lunch at noon all of a sudden now they're eating at one they didn't change their lunch time. They just started eating an hour late. Yeah. So now dinner. Is it only an hour difference?

Starting point is 01:14:29 When they change the time zone? Yeah. Which doesn't explain why you're eating. Yeah. Because we don't eat at 9 to 10. Yeah, yeah. But that's one reason they give that they've never changed the time zone back. Slippery slope.

Starting point is 01:14:39 Like your other egg goes, might as well just have dinner at midnight then. You go, I don't know. It's only an hour. Bathrooms are called different things in different countries. Washrooms. The loo. The loo in England. In France, Germany, and the Netherlands, they call it the water closet or toilet.

Starting point is 01:15:07 Toilet. Toilet is funny. Australia calls it a desert. I think toilet is kind of gross. I feel like bathroom is like a... Washroom, I don't like. I like washroom. Washroom feels a little more proper.

Starting point is 01:15:23 It does. And more accurate. I can see why other countries are like, well, you're not resting and you're not taking a bath. I'm resting. A restroom.

Starting point is 01:15:31 A restroom is, a restroom even sounds better. Like bathroom, restroom, washroom, you know. When someone's like, where's the toilet? You're like,

Starting point is 01:15:39 good night, man. You're just beating back with a broom. Just get back at it get back out of here. Like just, you know, it's like, oh, you're looking for the John. I mean, that's. Yeah. What do you call the portable?

Starting point is 01:15:54 The portable ones. Port-a-johns. Port-a-johns. That's what I call them. Is that what you call them? Yeah. I don't know. I started calling it that over the last couple of years.

Starting point is 01:16:01 I like it. Yeah. Better than. Port-a-potty. I hate saying that porta john's porta potty maybe i say porta potty i hate porta potty yeah i guess i do too yeah really we have one in our driveway right now uh porta john porta potty yeah i think i say porta potty what do you call the bathroom on the plane i don't know never gone bathroom oh uh an air air john

Starting point is 01:16:22 isn't it um and't it called I forgot the water closet no it's like I don't know lavatory lavatory thank you

Starting point is 01:16:31 lavatory yeah but you don't even go I'm gonna go to the lavatory I'm going to the bathroom they say the lavatory when they tell you so you know

Starting point is 01:16:38 but no one goes I'm gonna go to the lavatory one of my old jobs is I used to work at Port-A-John Island and uh we did a episode on odd jobs I don't think you ever mentioned this One of my old jobs is I used to work at Port-A-John Island. We did an episode on odd jobs. I don't think you ever mentioned this.

Starting point is 01:16:50 Maybe we did. I used to work at Fontenelle Music Venue with my buddy Carter Jackson. He was my boss. He was also my roommate. But he drove a lull, which we can talk about that too. A forklift. Do you ever call it a lull? No.

Starting point is 01:17:06 He used to drive a lull. And a big part of our job was to build port-a-john island in the back which is like 80 port-a-johns we had to pick them up carry them on the lull over there arrange them that's what we did before every concert let's get port-a-john island together yeah you didn't have to clean them we didn't have to pick them up afterwards that was a a, you need a specialist for that. Yeah. But we'd set up the empty ones. And you would have to do forklifts. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:17:29 Just like set them down. Carry them up on the wall over there. Yeah. Yeah. So you don't have to get out and touch them at all. I did. Well, we had to move them. We had to take them off and set them up.

Starting point is 01:17:38 Yeah. Took hours, man. Yeah. I can imagine. I could see that. That's the job. I had jobs like that. It's a very, yeah, you're definitely not smarter than your audience with that kind of job. Like that's, I've done those jobs where you're, you're, it's like, they're like, we just can't teach an animal to do this or we would do that. So that's most of my jobs were like, if we could train a gorilla to do it, we would.

Starting point is 01:18:06 But it's like, you just do it. You'd be out of the way. I mean, recycling tires, when I did that job, it's just like, we just don't have a machine yet for this. So we're just looking for just maybe the most uneducated person. Just a warm body. Who's not yeah he's not bringing anything to the world no i'll do it you go you do it in a cave all right i got more

Starting point is 01:18:35 examples where we can shift directions which way what's of like word different phrases, things like that. Is there any other interesting? Well, to me, but maybe not. Yeah, do. In the South, we say y'all. Like, we'd say how y'all doing. The rest of the country says, how you guys doing? In New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, they say how you's doing. In Pittsburgh, how yin's doing.

Starting point is 01:19:02 How yin's. There you go. Trash can, garbage can. Trash can. I say waste receptacle. Yeah. I think I say trash can. Most of the country says trash can.

Starting point is 01:19:15 Pacific Northwest says garbage can. But I've heard garbage can. Garbage can. I've heard, yeah. Garbage can sounds better. I think we say the garbage has got to go out. Yeah. Like you've got to take it to the.

Starting point is 01:19:24 We say take the trash out. Well, you take the garbage has got to go out yeah like you gotta take it to the we say take the trash out well you take the trash out is your take the trash out is take the trash out from your house to the garbage can that's true and then you go take the garbage the garbage has got to go out today that means you got to roll the roll it up to the street roll up to the it's a good point i agree with that that's a big thing on neighborhood now that i'm in a neighborhood and yeah like the facebook neighborhood there's always some debate about when the garbage trucks are coming around yeah I agree with that. That's a big thing on neighborhood. Now that I'm in a neighborhood, like the Facebook neighborhood, there's always some debate about when the garbage trucks are coming around. Yeah. Always some.

Starting point is 01:19:50 Yeah. Lightning bug or fireflies? Lightning bug. Lightning bug. Yeah. Eastern half of the U.S. call it lightning bugs, and western half say fireflies. Firefly.

Starting point is 01:20:02 Gross. Yeah. Mud season. New Englanders have a period between winter and spring, which is called mud season. Okay. That's where, so that's when it's still cold, but the snow is melted and it's just gross.

Starting point is 01:20:19 Very muddy. Okay. Yeah. Yep, yep. Do some of the other ones. Shifting gear? Yeah. All right. So we're also talking about some life hacks. Yeah. Yep. Yep. Do some of the other ones. Shifting gear? Yeah. All right.

Starting point is 01:20:26 So we're also talking about some life hacks. Yeah. Oh, man. I thought of, I was trying to think of one. I thought of one for you. I feel like you have a bunch that you've shared with me over the years. Yeah. You're a little bit like Kramer in that regard.

Starting point is 01:20:38 Yeah. You've always got something to do. One I thought of you was the Flat Stanley. Is that what it's called no not flat stanley uh uh lazy susan yeah yeah that's like he's married that's his wife that's flat stanley's wife is lazy susan beat his wife yeah yeah i've got two lazy susans in my fridge oh tell us what you do and i highly recommend i put stuff on it dude dude. Yeah. I got tired of trying to find the right condiment, digging through it. Now I just spin that sucker around.

Starting point is 01:21:09 Why don't you just leave your condiments out? Well, I could do that, but I'm a... Didn't you post that? You're a bit of a lazy Susan. Didn't you post it and it got a ton of traction? Oh, yeah. I got trashed. A few people trashed it.

Starting point is 01:21:23 They said, this is the laziest thing I've ever seen. And people are like this is brilliant i'm getting some yeah um i recommend it dude it'll change the game and it's a good conversation piece yeah sending is yeah because when you have you have a lot of buddies when y'all come over y'all hang out at the fridge and then walk-in cooler yeah y'all just end up where's aaron at here you go him and his buddies are over the fridge is open just look at this they're talking it starts beeping they have to shut it and open it back up you know we got good in them three more minutes to go and you just spin it y'all just wander spin around that'd be a big man party y'all just wander. Spin around. That'd be a big man party. Y'all just end up all just slowly end up next thing you know, your friend doors open.

Starting point is 01:22:09 You're just all standing there like, feels good. I can think a couple that drive hand. You told me one. I don't think you, well, how would a conversation starter, I guess. Here's how it would go down. Yeah. nate you come over to my house what's

Starting point is 01:22:27 up man thanks for coming by can i get you something to drink yeah all right let me oh dude look at this look what i did i ever show you this oh i've got now i gotta follow you in the kitchen so i i didn't now i gotta my kitchen's pretty close to the front door oh hey come over here yeah you want something to drink let me show. Come on, let me show you something. It's French. It's in the living room. Yeah. Yeah. So how you peel a banana, which I think you may have said on here.

Starting point is 01:22:53 And tell us why. This is how the monkeys do it. And if they, you do it not by the, what is that? The stem, I guess. The stem. The handle. The handle. And you do it up at the bottom,

Starting point is 01:23:05 and that's how monkeys do it. And it's the easiest way to open. I haven't opened a band in the other way in forever. And it just goes, and it opens. You know, the other one, it would sometimes break off or that. You just open it upside down.

Starting point is 01:23:16 I haven't had many problems with the other way. I bet you've had more problems than you realize. Because, I mean, wouldn't the monkeys who, this is their world, then, you know, do it the way they do it i've never tried it that way but it seems like it would be hard to get it started like it's not it's uh it's very easy and you just can you can squeeze it and like it just it just goes and it's the easiest thing ever you squeeze it you could do it i mean laura and she can bring

Starting point is 01:23:41 a banana up here uh and I'm going to show you. Yeah. Grab one out of the cabinet. You want to ask her too? Just say. And the other thing is, that I remember you telling, how you pack your clothes.

Starting point is 01:23:53 Is it there a way in a suitcase that. You can, they would always say, roll them up. So you, if you roll your stuff, you wouldn't have to iron it. And,

Starting point is 01:24:02 so if you, like if you, if you even do a suit, one do a suit, one way to do a suit was you turn the suit inside out, put one sleeve inside the other sleeve, and then roll the suit up. And then it takes up less space, and then you have it rolled up. I had these one things I bought that were these zip packs, and you could just lay – you'd have your things rolled up and they would all be in there now me packing is a little different than most i mean especially now now we have a bus i have like because i have show clothes so that stuff's all hangers and you

Starting point is 01:24:36 get a closet on i got a closet like on the bus and so when i pack it's like i've started wearing like you know it's like i kind of wear athletic gear like Viore. Like I kind of wear that everywhere because it's like then that stuff doesn't get wrinkled. And then, you know, maybe I'll have one outfit if I got to go. I mean, you know, my life is not – most people have to wear suits or stuff to work, but that's how I pack. One of the life hacks –

Starting point is 01:25:01 I leave it packed too. I put a – in my my closet we built like just this little thing to have three levels and i have my top suitcases on the is on the top shelf and it can stay open and then my other two suitcases so i have a bunch of different size suitcases i have one that's guaranteed it's going to fit in every carry-on. Well, maybe if you're on one of the smaller, you know, like it could be a little. I think you fit it sideways. And then I have another one that could fit in it.

Starting point is 01:25:38 If I'm on a regular plane, it'll fit like in a carry-on. And then I have a big one. And so, like, that's the system. But I always leave it. I have one, two, three. I kind of leave it open. I mean, I kind of live in my suitcase. I don't really take everything out.

Starting point is 01:26:03 I'll take it out, wash it, and then I just – but it's helped wearing athletic stuff is like kind of keeps everything a little more simple yeah one of the life hacks it gave was instead of stacking your clothes in your drawers like this you could do it like that so then you can see every piece of clothing like so not don't go up go sideways yeah uh so you're not digging around see something's in there yeah yeah yeah i i hang a lot of stuff uh i hang i mean everything like t-shirts and stuff t-shirts golf shirts like i could get like not wanting to but it's like just kind of easy when it's hanging you know oh look what we got here here's sister abigail So here's how. Hey, everybody. So this is how we do it.

Starting point is 01:26:53 In the monkey world, we would call baboons do it. Okay. We even make fun of, in the monkey world, we make fun of baboons, and then we call humans baboons. And so you open it this way, and then you just go. And that split because it was soft right there, but perfect banana. You eat that tip part? I don't usually, but.

Starting point is 01:27:16 See, this is already. Okay. All right. It's already better. It seems like it's more work. It wasn't. I mean, that's a perfect banana. After you broke off the thing at the top?

Starting point is 01:27:29 No. You could eat that top part. Oh, okay. All right. Can you pull up that? All these are from lifehack.org. Oh, yeah. So.

Starting point is 01:27:42 Huh? I'm all right. I don't use my hands. People offer me napkins a lot like i got it i just do this i don't i have a weird thing with napkins like what i don't like them i can i'll use them i like uh i really use a towel i have like like the cotton like cotton or like a napkin like if it around my teeth gets me like like i can't handle it yeah and so i have a we have like at home i have a towel so if we ever have dinner over here i will always have a towel and everybody else will have napkins i can use napkins if i go somewhere i know how not to look like a wild animal I can be appropriate and do it, but I, it's, it's, I can get very, like, I don't like, like the fabric of a napkin. Like it's like the paper, like I can picture if it hits my teeth,

Starting point is 01:28:34 I'm going to be like, and so. What about paper towel? Same thing? No, I would, I use paper towels, but if I mean, if I start thinking about it, then it's like, but I, but I, I use paper towel, but I'm just wiping my hands off if they're wet or something. Yeah. I have to use napkins a lot because you're going to places that that's all they have. Yeah. But, I mean, if I go to a place and they have a cloth napkin, I mean, I'm thrilled. You're tucking in the napkin.

Starting point is 01:29:00 No, no. But it always makes me way happier. I'd rather use a cloth than a paper napkin. But like the McDonald's. I could never hold a napkin. My napkins never get crumbled. I fold mine. Mine always look kind of – I can't crumble one.

Starting point is 01:29:13 That like gets me weird. And so like I do it to not even – like Laura, do we do it where I don't really mention it to Harper because I don't want her to do this weird thing. I want her to give it a shot at a normal life. All right, so here's some life hacks. I didn't put all of them on there from this website. Tie a small piece of bright-colored fabric to your luggage. Saves time at the airport when the luggage is coming out.

Starting point is 01:29:41 That would be a very person from Lebanon life hack. Like, never been traveled before. You're like, this is like, I think they make suitcases that look a little different. You're like, all right, I got one I heard the other day.

Starting point is 01:29:51 Never heard it. Put a piece of tape at the top of the, I think if you get this person's suitcase too, that they're a picture of, you're going to be the only one with that suitcase. It looks pretty beat up. Yeah. And you're,

Starting point is 01:30:04 you're like, you don't worry about it other people most suitcases are black though i i yeah i understand it mine are pretty mine looks pretty different yeah uh but i mean i get the idea of it i get the logic of it i understand it i think it's it's uh that's like someone that's i think this travel stuff is like once you start traveling a lot you're like it's not you look at like how much time how i don't know it's like how much you gotta tie this thing on versus how much time are you really saving how hectic is the getting the bags in your life that you're like we gotta streamline it or we're gonna we're you know it could be annoying at that carousel man it you can't i know but you're you just you just sit

Starting point is 01:30:53 there when it comes out you go oh that bet that's mine i understand if you have one that looks like every other one i could see tying a little something on there uh-huh like i i understand it maybe you don't want someone to take yours. I've had someone take my bag before. I understand that. But like this is all like when they talk about airplanes, like airlines losing bags. Like I know that happens, but you're like when someone can put you like, don't quit acting like this happens every single time you travel.

Starting point is 01:31:17 Pretty rare. It's, I would think, I don't even know if it's once a year. For an average person, I doubt it's even once a year. We talked about that on the travel episode. It's very small. And so people complain and they just throw into like, well, I don't. And so I understand this, but I'm just saying. You could also go like, how much?

Starting point is 01:31:39 If you really look at it and go, are you that upset? That's why I started checking my bag a ton because it's like am i that you know people like i don't want to deal with the people down there you're like well is it that crazy for you if you really think i travel every i would travel every week yeah is it that crazy is it that much of a now now also i travel different different times. My life hack is don't do this. It's try to travel. Don't try to fly out at 6 a.m. That would be my life hack for you.

Starting point is 01:32:14 Try to leave at even 9, 10. The difference of the amount of people you're around is crazy. It's crazy. You got to think that's my life hack on everything is kind of i look at i look at the situation i look at lines and i look at because i can just you watch people people just you know we talked about the the experience experiment like where the people just get in line people just do stuff if you're just a little aware you shave off time all day long. Even you go look at the line for where people go get for their bags. It's like maybe go right to where the thing opens. People don't always go there.

Starting point is 01:32:52 Sometimes they go to the middle. People go like, you know, you can see people kind of, they gradually go to one other place. Also- You go right up front, don't you, and stand? No, this is my biggest pet peeve. I never get as mad as I get when I'm waiting for my bag to come to the carousel and these animals storm the carousel and they get all the way up to it and now everybody has to get up to it because you can't stand back and see your back so you're just like well now i gotta play this

Starting point is 01:33:17 game that these idiots play i gotta stand up right by the carousel because everybody else is and i want to be like everybody if if you just back up, if everybody backs up 10 feet, we can all see it. And you don't have to work your way through this crowd. Then the line is just at the 10 feet mark instead of up against it. But then you can all see, you can all see it back there.

Starting point is 01:33:39 If everybody's back, it's like you wouldn't go to a museum where everybody's walking through and looking at paintings. Wouldn't walk right up in front of the painting. Then nobody behind you can see. Let's all back up a little bit, and then we'll all be good. I get so mad, dude. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:33:53 So what I would say, some of it is like you got to think, I'm trying to avoid frustration. All that stuff is like when you get mad, you're trying to avoid the frustration. That's how I looked at everything. All that stuff is like, when you get mad, you're trying to avoid the frustration. That's how I looked at everything. When I travel, it's like, what can I do? If I'm going to get frustrated, that's what's going to ruin my day. It's not the time.

Starting point is 01:34:15 It's the frustration of the experience. Right. So some of that will be like, well, I'll go stand at the end of the belt where there's not a soul, and I'll just wait a little longer for my bag to come. Just to avoid. Just to avoid the chaos. Being in the mess of this. Squeezing and fighting. Just go stand at the end.

Starting point is 01:34:31 Yeah. And then be like, it's like, instead of trying to like, you don't try to solve everybody's problems. You go, I'll just do a thing that no one, I don't think anybody else is doing. And then I'll go stand over there. You're the last one that, I mean, you just get it and be watched. It's not like You're the last one. I mean, you just get it and be watched. It's not like we act like this time is like these people are like they're a day ahead of us because they got it. You're like you might even beat them.

Starting point is 01:34:54 The hassle of even getting the bag out with everybody kind of jammed in. Let everybody jam in. If you just go look, everybody kind of in any situation, everybody kind of goes like that and goes together. And they want to eat in a line to get food, a line to get any. Everybody kind of does this. So if you just kind of look and go like, all right, let me just make sure it's not going to, like what's the least frustrating way to try to get my,

Starting point is 01:35:17 whatever I'm trying to get. There's a life hack. Find the least frustrating way. When I first was going on the road with him i mean i was like you got to get this he's not easy wait what was what was happening i mean you he's never flown it's not so when you when we first started going you've i mean maybe 12 times you've been on it like it you got to realize it's it would be frustrating when you do this every single week and then you got someone that approaches an escalator like it's like it's

Starting point is 01:35:45 just got invented yesterday and they're like whoa whoa whoa whoa you know he's getting on everything's like how fast like it's gonna like like it's jerking like it's not just a constant speed it's like well i don't want to get it when it takes off you know and so it would be that that would be it was very hard so it's hard for me to travel some because i have so it's because it's like you have your system you're like i do my thing i'll go stand here i don't always go uh you know when everybody gets up to that line and everybody's going to board and everybody just goes crazy yeah it's annoying when those people stand there that's super close but you stand back you watch the chaos yeah and then when it's your turn to go, I enter the chaos at my speed.

Starting point is 01:36:27 And so I'm kind of like either the back of the chaos, maybe I can even get in front of the chaos because the chaos can sometimes, they're so chaotic that you can just go like another way because you're like, they're not even, no one's even paying attention to you. This is everybody's moment is like, this is the most craziest moment of my life is getting on this plane. And you just go like, I'm gonna make it nice and easy. And I'm going to just go and just, you know, right. It's like,

Starting point is 01:36:51 there's a little, like even when you're, I know they make you pay for seats and all this kind of stuff. Like when you're picking seats out, it was like, I would tell, I was talking to my wife. It's like,

Starting point is 01:36:59 well, keep checking it. Like if you want to move a seat and you're thinking about it, like keep, keep really checking it. Look at the price for real. Sometimes people don't want to move a seat and you're thinking about it like keep keep really checking it look at the price for real sometimes people don't want to do the large you know they just i want the cheapest one i don't want to think but maybe go like well let's take a look at it yeah sometimes it honestly might be 50 bucks to get a first class flight yeah maybe yeah maybe not but maybe try it maybe you don't now you don't pay to check it back.

Starting point is 01:37:26 Just look at it. Yeah. Does it hurt to look? You look at it. You go, I don't know how to get it. Or you look at the trip and go, I don't want to be that. Is it that crazy? Is it that like, you know, you think about your time and then you go off of that.

Starting point is 01:37:39 That's a good life hack. You feel, what do you find with? What do you find with being chaotic some stuff you're like yeah i want the cheapest thing and i'm i welcome the chaos yeah because i'm i'm paying for the chaos to save the money yeah so i'm not mad at the it's also how you enter the chaos enter it with like the you get i think i know do, so I don't know if everybody, but I get frustrated if something doesn't go the way I want it to go. But if I'm open to going any way and I don't know, and I'm almost excited that it could go any kind of crazy way. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:38:13 Then I enjoy, then I can enjoy the experience. But if it's, if I go, this ain't going what I, like, so I have to remind myself sometimes I would have to do this. I have to go, all right all right this i would do it with food i always had a big problem like too like eating or me and lark again fights where i would be like we were supposed to be going to do this and now we're not eating there we're eating this and like so it doesn't go the way i want it to go and sometimes i would have to so in it the mind would be as stupid as that and i'd have to tell myself like all right what if i don't get to do what i want to and then i'm like i don't

Starting point is 01:38:45 really care yeah and i'm because i don't really care i just care about my it's not happening the way i want it to i don't care about what is happening i care about me not getting to do what i want so if i if i can look at it and go you know what i got to get there that's like you talk about playing like henry's being nice with you golf i think i've been nice with you golf like it's like because i can go you don't know how to play yeah you're not i'm i'm okay like i enjoy helping like i don't but if we go and we're playing and i'm like expecting you're like yo dude this is not what it was supposed to be then it's like all bets are off but if i can go in and be like yeah hey i don't know how to play okay this was all in the brochure yeah you yeah this is what

Starting point is 01:39:23 i'm buying otherwise i would just not play with you. And so, like, that's all you. Like, I don't, it's not like I have to play with just good golfers. I just want to know what, you're just like, what am I walking into? What am I walking into? Right. You know? Do you think you're easy to travel with?

Starting point is 01:39:38 I think if you did what I told you to do, it would be. But you think you're easy. Like, who's I travel all the time and you don't so you would understand the frustration to be like there's a system like i'm doing this every weekend and then i just it's like walking with a child that's like you know like if people travel with kids it gets hard because you're like kids don't know how to like do and you would in the one flight you almost missed yep like that i mean that was like you almost missed the gig because you go the flight was delayed and i was like it doesn't

Starting point is 01:40:10 matter they can drop of a dime just change your flight back to the time it was supposed to be and you stayed home like it was like like it's like a concrete like it's in concrete can never change and so yeah like seeing that to be like if you almost missed the gig because you think well i'll just go back home that's very frustrating because then maybe i have to do a show that night and i have to go do longer time because you have never heard of an airport and you think you're like well they they mail the letter and it's in stone it's written in stone they can't change the flight back and i'm like that's not how it works they can flip it just like that if you feel like if

Starting point is 01:40:44 it feels like a day that's where flights are being. They can flip it just like that. If you feel like, if it feels like a day where flights are being flipped, you can kind of feel it out. You can, you know, gauge it. But that one was, yeah, that was very frustrating. Counterpoint, Brian? He is not easy to travel with. I make it pretty easy on you now. You get on a bus and like, I would fly you first class.

Starting point is 01:41:02 I mean, let's act like I'm throwing you in the back of a, I mean, my goodness. No one's ever treated, I've been treated that as the opener. Just go like, hey, you want to fly first class with me? Do you want to sit in the bus? Do you want to get like, how easy can it possibly be to be at the beginning? It's pretty easy. Flight to normal time. Flights are never 6 a.m.

Starting point is 01:41:24 I know you were never getting up at 6 a.m i know you were never getting up at 5 a.m and going we always leave at 11 might have to pay a little extra for that but i paid for your flight extra yeah but yeah go ahead tell me how am i frustrating to travel with i think that answers it does it yeah i don't i pay for his flight doesn't he doesn't he's never paid you never paid for a flight with me yeah that's unreal i pay for his flight. He's never paid. You never paid for a flight with me. No. That's unreal. I pay for every flight, hotel, all of it. Yeah. And I cover everybody.

Starting point is 01:41:51 Yeah. But I guess I'm a little, as you wander through an airport and you've been like, what has happened? Like we're moving across the country. Every day is like we're moving across the country. That's what I would say with you, traveling with you like it would be like the oregon trail every day we're flying to pittsburgh for a night and it's like you i mean it's like we're like i said we're moving to pittsburgh you're never gonna see your family again get it all out that's how i think you travel i think you've gotten better obviously as you've flown more, right?

Starting point is 01:42:25 Yeah. Yeah. I used to, when I first started, flew maybe once a year. I don't think I was that bad, but. You were that bad. You didn't show up that time. You just didn't show up. I mean, I made the flight.

Starting point is 01:42:36 I mean, I think I had to call you or like I had to, like it was barely. Yes. Yes, that's true. Our flight got delayed. Mm-hmm. And so I got to the airport later and then another plane came in i think or something and so i mean i i barely made the flight do you have to run through the airport i did have to run to the airport to get to the gate so yeah so that's

Starting point is 01:42:57 frustrating when your guy that you're with is supposed to be with is not there that's that's pretty frustrating to be like it's the stress of like now i gotta make sure you get to this show uh-huh yeah that stress i learned a lesson i didn't i didn't know that they might bring in another plane your flight gets moved back up so yeah yeah they can do whatever they want yeah i understand i get the idea of not knowing but that could have been maybe if i it is when i know what i'm dealing with, but that's where I would, you would want to be like, well, I just want to fly separate. I mean, look, I don't think I'm easy to fly with. I'm not bad to fly with, but when you travel every day, every week, it's,

Starting point is 01:43:34 it's different. If you worked out every, if someone's a fitness person and they work out alone every time, and then I go work out with you, you're going to be annoyed that I don't know how to do everything you know how to do. Anybody on earth, it's not like I'm a bad person to travel with. This is any situation. You would be frustrated if you had your job at Channel 5 and I come in and you got to show me how to do stuff. You're like, dude, let me just do this. So anybody would be frustrated with that.

Starting point is 01:44:09 So when you get in your little bubble of like going, I travel and you're like, yeah, I kind of just like to, I this because i'm here every day i don't you know it's it's it's not that's what sometimes when you would fly to go into like orlando or something you're like it would be frustrating because you're on a plane with people that are on vacation and so it's frustrating to be like everybody's taking pictures everybody's doing it it's like a party and you're like it's thursday dude i just i just landed two days ago and i gotta fly out again it's part, dude. I just landed two days ago, and I got to fly out again. Is part of you jealous of that joy they still have? No, because it's just a different experience. I mean, I travel, so there's stuff that I might enjoy that they would enjoy. So it's like a different – it's just a different experience.

Starting point is 01:44:44 But I don't – I fly, I bother – I try not to bother anybody. you know so it's like a different it's just a different experience but people that try but i don't you know i fly i bother i try not to bother anybody yeah i i try to not be seen there you go that's how i travel so yeah i had to get frustrated with like and i saw all this stuff like laura will be like she could sometimes not change seats right so i would i would lose my mind over this so like if her and my mom and Harper are flying, and then she doesn't change, like they buy the ticket, they just get the seats wherever, and they go, well, I'll just ask people to move.

Starting point is 01:45:13 And I think a lot of people- Oh, instead of just getting them changed? I think a lot of people do that. They think, well, I'll just deal with it when I get on the plane. It's not that big of a deal. Or even if you're going Southwest, where you got to get on the thing, where you're like, well, if we want three to be together, it's like, well, it'll work out.

Starting point is 01:45:27 Like I'll just, you just ask and someone, and a lot of people will move in the sense, I fly once a year. Yeah, I don't know. I'll let you sit together. I don't care. But then there's people that are flying like me, that are flying every week.

Starting point is 01:45:38 Well, that's very annoying. And I might even give in to what you're going to do just because I'm like, I'm not a maniac. And I've sat in the middle seat because these two girls were like, can we sit next to each other? They had a middle seat. And what, are you going to look them in the eyes and say no? That's brutal.

Starting point is 01:45:55 That's so hard to do, to look someone in the eyes and go, absolutely not. Are you insane? That's what you want to say. Are you crazy? You're not trading a fair thing. You're giving me a middle seat just so you can, and now, it's not fair. And no one ever trades fair either. You can always see that too when people do want to trade seats.

Starting point is 01:46:14 They never trade. They never give you the better seat. Right. They never go, like if they have two aisles or something, I always think if I'm going to have to do that, sometimes you do. Like so me and Travis or me and you were flying or something, and we have different seats because I couldn't get them together, then at least have an owl and a window. And so then you're giving the person to be like, you're really not, like unless they were like, yo, I got to, I think I've seen one guy that's like, you know, he's like got – what's the – superstitious or something, like he wanted to fly in an exact thing.

Starting point is 01:46:50 I've actually seen that. Weird. But it's like whatever. Like that's what it is. He's like, you know, then you got the bad end of the draw. But usually you're going to find someone that's like, hey, I'm trading you the exact same – you can almost even sit in that seat. I've had that happen where they're like, hey, I'm sitting here.

Starting point is 01:47:07 Do you mind just sitting on that? And you're like, yeah. Who cares? That's the exact same seat. Right. So it's like, but people, I think people that don't fly a lot, I'll just figure it out when I get there. Well, you end up asking, that's not really fair. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:47:21 And then it's like, that's what you, you're making people move around and you think, whatever, it doesn't matter. Like, I don't care. Like, you know, it's like, I look at that. And so then that's when I get, you know,

Starting point is 01:47:32 so I'll get on Laura about like, I mean, we can get some fights about it because I'll be like, you can't just go ask people to switch. Yeah. That's not fair.

Starting point is 01:47:40 Yeah. You can't like, we're just going to sit. I mean, I almost like, we're going to sit separate on for on, out sit separate out of principle. Here's our one-year-old who's going to sit in a chair alone to make a point

Starting point is 01:47:54 that you should have just at once just either, like, if someone wants an exit, like if a big dude wants the exit row, I always think, then you got to buy the exit row. You got to buy it, man. Like, it's, I understand, you to buy it man like it's it's it's I understand you know it's like a guy walks on the plane he's six six but he gets in on southwest he lands it you know he's on road c or where he's in whatever boarding group d yeah and it's like it's like well come on man I'm six six you're like then pay you can go when you go to

Starting point is 01:48:23 southwest you after you check in you can go to the check-in counter. I do it all the time. And pay $40. It's $30 sometimes. $30 or $40, and you get moved up to a $1 to $15. Right. And somewhere in that thing. And then maybe you can talk to one of them about switching into the Southwest thing.

Starting point is 01:48:43 Maybe you could, but like 30, 40 bucks. So either deal with it or pay. There's ways to try to figure out how to get a little bit up sooner. You can do something. But I think people just get on. They go, I'll just guilt. They don't care about guilting the person into it.

Starting point is 01:49:02 And if I ever see a man, if I ever see a man ever see a guy he goes no i'm always like i'm like jealous of that person like how could you like i would have given it to the guy i would have been like yeah i guess you know you're not even boarding you're not even giving me an aisle seat now dude like i don't even get anything i get something bad a lot of people now southwest by the pre-board right like ahead of time online yeah i just flew southwest and i was waiting 24 hours ahead yeah when you check in and clicked on as soon as it happened and it was i was like cb40 yeah and i was like there's no what but they must have already pre-bought right yeah a lot of

Starting point is 01:49:35 them are like pre-buying by the early bird check-in early bird yeah they'll jump the gun yeah yeah yeah or you gotta buy the yeah it's i mean, Southwest is, the hard part of Southwest too, a lot of people don't know, only really one true exit row. If people want to go, I'll give a little life hack. If you go in Southwest, there's only one real exit row, and it's the three seats that are together. The seats on the left, the one with the really long, you got the long seat in Southwest with no seat in front of you. The other seats around it are regular seats. They're regular seats for sure.

Starting point is 01:50:10 And I watch people sit in them all the time and they have no idea. Yeah. And they think, they go, they'll go to it first. If you want,

Starting point is 01:50:17 I don't even like the really long one. I think it's like too long. It's like almost an odd amount of space. It's awkward. So, I always go to the exit row in southwest and uh

Starting point is 01:50:27 i go right to the it depends on how long the flight you can go to the window or the aisle but i just go right to the exit row and a good thing too sometimes in the exit row is a lot of times the the flight attendant we're telling everybody all this but i mean the flight attendant will stand in your middle seat there There it is. In the exit row. So you go to that exit row, and you have her stand in that middle seat. And most people are not paying attention enough. They just go, oh, and you can end up getting an empty exit row seat just because people are not paying attention.

Starting point is 01:50:57 This is all people not – a life hack is just pay attention. Right. If you just pay attention. I've seen people walk by the exit row just because the flight attendant is standing in the third row of x row and they just think oh i guess she's sitting there and they think what's a flight attendant so she's just that's the only that's the most space she has to stand in so that's why she stands there because there's no other x rows so they just people just walk by and you end up seeing where like no one's in the next row yeah because you're like well they didn, they didn't pay attention. And paying attention is everything.

Starting point is 01:51:27 Just pay attention. You get through life easy. So I have a ton of these, and we've only read one. Yeah. So I can either keep going or – No, I think, yeah. I think I did them all for everybody. Oh, well, I feel like there's some fun ones maybe for a future episode.

Starting point is 01:51:39 Yeah, yeah. We can do it again. Yeah, sure. Yeah, we'll do it again. But we'll stop now. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I love talking about it.. Yeah, we'll do it again. But we'll stop now. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:51:45 I mean, I love talking about it. We would end up going on for another. Each one for another. Yeah. All right. So we're doing another. We're doing a life hack episode. Maybe we'll do one next.

Starting point is 01:51:56 Yeah. Yeah. Record one extra right now. So maybe we'll do another life hack because I enjoy talking about it. Yeah. Yeah. That's what i bring to life you're someone that is just what i mean you're you're a cow on the like just

Starting point is 01:52:13 look at the butt in front of you and just walk walk walk walk until it's your turn to be slaughtered and then you know i'm a. It sticks his head up and goes, Hey, I don't think we're going. If we all turned and moved and went the other way, we would go out. Yeah. I love it.

Starting point is 01:52:33 Uh, April 18th, live Nate land podcast from Zanies. Live Nate land podcast. Mike Vecchione will be there with us. Oh, wow. On the pod?

Starting point is 01:52:41 On the pod. Nice. Mike Vecchione, we're, we haven't made a, it hasn't been a full, full announcement on this yet, so I don't, but I'll tell you guys privately. Everybody be cool about it.

Starting point is 01:52:52 Don't say anything. Be cool. But we are, I am, Nate Land is going to be Nate Land. The idea of it, hopefully doing Nate Land Productions, and I'm producing and directing Mike Vecchione's special. That's awesome, man. And so, it's on April 19th.

Starting point is 01:53:08 I think we're doing two shows. We haven't made a full, full-on big announcement. I will make a big announcement. Tickets are for sale. So, if you do want to go,

Starting point is 01:53:16 Vecchione's one of the funniest comedians. And, you know, it's like, and he, you know, Vecchione's always been a comic. Like,

Starting point is 01:53:23 I don't want this to be the real reason of like, you know, it's like, if you like, but if you're here for what I do for the aspect of it being clean or the act of this not being heavy and not being whatever divisive or political, like that kind of stuff. That's the idea that I want to make with stuff. Vecchione was basically already that. A lot of those, not everybody I was working with say what used to be clean. It doesn't really matter. But what I want to end up being like, well, if Nate lands on it, then you can know that if you like what I would do, that I'm going to give you that. And so I'll be able to give you, I mean, this is all new.

Starting point is 01:53:59 But I'm, so if Nate lands attached to it, it's like you will know. But I'm, so if Nate lands attached to it, it's like, you will know. And like, it's like, I think with Vecchione is like, we're giving you the comedy that's not, you know, sometimes a clean comedy can be, it's not a bad thing, but it can be corny. It can be, it can be labeled as all these other kinds of things where ours will not be laid. It's not being about being labeled clean. It's just, it is, it's just trying to be funny. And we do it this way, which is just a different way.

Starting point is 01:54:22 We're just doing it a different way. And so we're not competing with the other people doing it the other way. There's no difference in that. So Vecchione's got a special together, and he'll be able to do it like that, and it's going to be unreal. Vecchione's someone that deserves all of this, someone I can get behind wholeheartedly. I started with him 20 years.

Starting point is 01:54:43 I mean, there's not many better than him. No one's as fun as Daniel. I mean, he's just a seasoned comedian. And so I want you to, you know, so, yeah, you're hearing it now. We've not made it. I've not, like, posted on social. I'm not going to be posting. I don't know when I'll be posting it.

Starting point is 01:55:02 But the tickets are on sale for that, and that will be my first special. I'm directing it. That's awesome, man. And what does that mean exactly, I don't know when I'll be posting it, but the tickets are on sale for that. And I'll be my first special. I'm directing it. That's awesome, man. What does that mean exactly? I don't know. I got to Google how to direct a standup special. You got to get one of those chairs. I got to get one of those chairs.

Starting point is 01:55:15 I mean, it's, I believe it's the shots. It's knowing like what to do and like that stuff. I mean, there's, we're doing it with 800 pound gorilla as well. And like, so there's's like so they know how to do this kind of stuff so i'm not going in blind i'm going with a company that this is what they do yeah uh so it's i'm there i'm relying on them a lot for the help but i want to just start this kind of idea in this process to be like i think stuff we can create eventually you know who knows like eventually not only shows movies like whatever it can be is like to be,

Starting point is 01:55:45 create this kind of thing that whatever you're here, the reason you're here is like we just want to be able to give you that. And, but I would not expect to make that big,

Starting point is 01:55:54 you know, but that, that, yeah, don't, that's exciting. No one really say anything about that.

Starting point is 01:55:58 We'll keep it on the DL. Everybody that's listening, let's just be, let's keep it all between us. That's during the Nashville Comedy Festival. That's during the Nashville Comedy Festival. The Vecchione, you can buy the tickets at the Vec all between us. That's during the Nashville Comedy Festival. That's during the Nashville Comedy Festival.

Starting point is 01:56:05 You can buy the tickets at Vecchione thing. But yeah, the Nate Land idea, that's the first time I've said it. But that's the future and the idea with that. I'll have a much more announcement. It'll be probably the same kind of thing. And it could be six months from now. I mean, I don't know.

Starting point is 01:56:21 That's my plan. But I'm telling you, you guys here at Nate Land, y'all get to hear first. So just keep it between all of us. Yeah, that's it. You have dates? Yes. This weekend, January 28th, 29th, I'm in Lowell, Arkansas at the Grove Comedy Club.

Starting point is 01:56:38 First time headline in there. Oh. Pretty exciting. So I'm going to be there. Yeah, I think it's two shows. Come on out. I'd love to have people come. Yeah, I think it's two shows. Come on out. I'd love to have people come. Yeah, I'll be in Indianapolis.

Starting point is 01:56:51 If you're listening to this on Wednesday, any of us, I believe it's tonight. Indianapolis and then Evansville, then two more Indianapolis, and then St. Louis, and then Columbia, Missouri. And then a bunch more dates are up. Go check them out. The shows have been fun. Go see everybody. Guys, you guys have always been super supportive of us,

Starting point is 01:57:09 and none of that goes. We notice that. We always notice that, and we can't thank you enough. You're the reason we're here. So thank you, and we'll see you next week. All right. Bye. Bye. Thanks everybody for listening to the Nateland podcast.

Starting point is 01:57:35 Be sure to subscribe to our show on iTunes, Spotify, you know, wherever you listen to your podcasts. And please remember to leave us a rating or a comment. Nateland is produced by me, Nate Bargetti, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by me, Nate Bargetti, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovation Consulting in partnership with Center Street Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.

The Nateland Podcast - #83 Regional Differences

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.