The Neighborhood Listen - The Norm Here with Chris Grace

Episode Date: May 20, 2025

Burnt shares some standards and practices from work, and we hear of a new collaboration between "Joan X Doug (feat. Escrow)". Today's guest is Mary, who is outraged at the behavior of Americans.Go to cbbworld.com and sign up for the Maximus plan to unlock this episode and ALL seasons of The Neighborhood Listen ad-free, as well as full length exclusive BONUS ROOM episodes adventuring deeper into Dignity Falls!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Mcrispy strips are now at McDonald's. Tender, juicy, and its own sauce. Would you look at that? Well, you can't see it, but trust me, it looks delicious. New Mcrispy strips, now at McDonald's. Hi, I'm Paul F. Tompkins. And I'm Nicole Parker. On this podcast, we improvise and character using real posts from a popular neighborhood networking website. Occasionally, we change the names of some streets. And that's all you need to know. To supportally, we change the names of some streets. And that's all you need to know. To support the show and unlock the ad-free archive, as well as exclusive monthly episodes of The Bonus Room, go to CBBWorld.com and sign up for a Maximus membership.

And now, please enjoy this episode of... The Neighborhood Listen! Knock, knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Good! In Dignity Falls, you're never alone You've got the Neighbor Half app and us!

Bert! And Joan! From coyotes to male theft to weird things to sell We'll cover it all! And meet new neighbors as well! We'll chat about any posts you're missing So just tune in to the Neighborhood Listen. Welcome once more to the Neighborhood Listen,

the podcast that explores the neighborhood of Dignity Falls through the eyes of its residents, including us. That's right. And who is us? Who is us? Let me tell you, me? I'm Burt Miapede. I'm the pharmacist in chief

at the Dignity Fallsmasy Pharmacy. And that's a mouthful. Truly. And me, I'm Joan Pedestrian. I am, I am, I don't know why this just occurred to me and I'm interrupting my own introduction. This has never happened before.

This is amazing. But you know what I'm really hating right now? What's that? Yeah, please tell me. Spill queen. I'm really hating right now? What's that? Yeah, please tell me. Spill queen. I'm really hating because I was going to say coming in as your realtor, I hate these sort of food Instagram accounts and the cameras there and they put their hand behind the ingredient. They say, I'm coming in with the black beans.

What? Do you know what I'm talking about? No, I haven't seen this. This is what they say. I'm coming in with the black beans. All of these mediocre, every ingredient they present, they say, and what I'm talking about? No, I haven't seen this. This is what they say. I'm coming in with the black beans. All of these mediocre, every ingredient they present, they say, and then I'm gonna come in with my salsa. It is absolutely obnoxious.

They put their hands, so they physically are shoving this into. No, it's as if that they need to, it's as if it's like putting a green screen or putting something behind the can so that you can see it better. This is what I mean when I say black beans. These, and then I go over here.

Wow. But they say coming in a lot. Yes, it is just the worst. It's like in retail places now they say welcome in. They do? Oh yeah, you were talking about this earlier. This really bothered you. We had to be in your body about it.

Somebody else was. Oh, they were, it was a different guest. And now I noticed it. You over articulated that. And now I noticed it. That's a good warmup. That's a good tongue twister. And now I noticed it. Not as good as my favorite Mitch McConnell's milkshake madness.

Now that's a tongue twister. That is a tongue twister. It's a real tongue twister. Try to say it again. You can't. So I'm coming in with a realty and with being a local actor. That's what I'm coming in with a realty and with being a local actor. That's what I'm coming in with today. And you can't see if I'm putting my hand behind myself.

That's right. And then of course, we always have Doug and he's in a last time he was in a hallway and it was very weird. How do we explain Doug to the listeners? I don't know how to explain Doug. If you haven't heard the show before. I mean, he's my husband. I don't know how to explain Doug. If you haven't heard the show before. I mean, he's my husband. I love him.

Of course you do. But he's always building a different room. And you know, for a while it was my idea. The rooms were always my idea, but lately they've been his idea. You would ask him to build these rooms, yeah. You, you, you really, you've built so much onto this house. And now, this is a question I've never dared ask. Oh.

Once the rooms are built, do they stay forever or do you demolish them to make other? So far they have, but I learned that he demolished. Are you ready for this? So you sitting down? I am sitting, you were looking at me. Because these are devastating to me. The bean room and the linen room so we could have crawl space to run through the hallway where he was going to be the eyes looking at people out of the paintings. The Habsburg hallway.

Yes, the Habsburg hallway. He took, he tore those down. Remember I said, I think that's what I said at the end of the last episode. I hope he didn't take down any of our rooms and that's what he did. And I'm not really happy about it, but you know, it is what it is. Well, we go now to Doug. I'm coming in with a sorry. You better have your hand behind you. I got my hat on my chest.

Oh, wow. Not in your hand. OK, I appreciate you laying down. You're not holding that. It's just it's on your chest. No, what I did was I did, you know, those you know, those hooks that you can buy that with the adhesive on them? You can hang your towels on it. Oh, sure, sure.

They never work that you have in college that if you put one towel that's just slightly wet it comes off. They've come a long way. They have? Okay, that's good. Yeah. You don't want to get generation one hooks. No.

Don't be a skin flint. Don't be a cheapskate. Don't spring for the new, the latest gen. I put a hook on my chest and I'm hanging the hat on there. Why? Because I'm deeply sorry. I didn't I didn't know. It's going to be a Kelly Clarkson moment when you rip it off. I need to. It took me a second.

I thought, what does Kelly Clarkson have to do with hooks? But now I understand. Can you help me understand? Remember the Forty-O-Old Virgin? Remember when they're giving him a chest wax? Oh, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he's in and I thought this would be fun. This is actually a collab that we did. Joan X. Doug?

Does it feet anyone? Eskro, our 30 something year old dog. 30. Is he lying about his age now? He's had no work done. That's apparent. So, and you know, I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry.

Does Eskro have any original parts left? This dog has cost you thousands of... He does have a pig heart. He has one of my kidneys. Just so we're clear, not the whole kidney. You did it in a dog kidney size. They really said they just needed it to take the place of it. It's not actually quite functioning as a kidney.

They just need to fill that space. And I said, I love my dog this much. I'm going to give him part of my organ. That's right. So, so no, there's really not a lot of them. That is the original parts. He's also been on Rogaine for dogs. So I mean like that. He's just not, I love him. I'll keep him. Okay. He has three peg legs.

Three. Yeah. So when he walks, he makes a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, that thing proudly. He freaky tail fly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So Doug is coming to us from the, he's coming in with the, with the, with a, you know, those, those sort of high schools and we had it, I don't know if they do it anymore at old dignity falls where you had a studio and you had a little closed circuit news, uh, sure, sure. And I, of course, no one's surprised. I, I was an anchor.

I was one of the co-anchors. Of course. And Doug, you know, used to run the camera for his. And well, I mean, we were at the school, but he left for five months and that's when we were broken up. But the rest of the time we did go to the same high school. So that's kind of how we fell in love. You were?

Yeah. Oh, that's so fun. And I would have a lot of conversations with the reporters and saying, Did you smoke? You can't, of course, we all smoked. Yeah, we all smoked. And I would say, we can't cover this.

Oh. We can't cover this. And I would get into arguments with these guys and gals all the time. They wanted to break open these big stories. And I would say, we can't. Sounds like a great movie. It's gonna ruin things.

Or something Aaron Sorkin should write. It can't be both. I got a pick. One or the other. Coming in with some Sorkin criticism. That's what Burns coming in with. So we built a little studio and we're going to, you know, we're trying to figure out how many monitors

we're going to put throughout the house. You know, I'm kind of surprised this hasn't happened. Me too too, but it hasn't. Yeah, I guarantee you you have a stage. I have a theater Yeah, which of course mostly is just stage. There's just one row of seats your dream theater I really wanted the real estate to go to the stage. Absolutely. Yeah, so my dream theater not my dream audience Uh, but it's okay, but it's always a sold out crowd. It only takes 12 people. So that's what we're doing. And I don't know if we're gonna, you know, I don't know if we're gonna sort of like open it up

to the neighborhood. That might be kind of fun. I'm not sure. The newscasts? Yeah. You mean? Yeah. But we haven't decided yet

because it's still in production. When you say open it up to the neighborhood, meaning you would broadcast it to other people's homes? Yes. Oh, okay. Not invite people from the neighborhood to come on and have shows. You're not going to do a public access. I don't know about that. I don't think I can do that. Oh, we could do. Yeah, we could do like a roundtable type of show. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Interesting to discuss the news of the Millieu. The what, babe? That's what you would call it. The Millieu. You just learned that word. Like the view. Oh no. Really? Is that

what you mean? So it's like five women, but word. Like the view. Oh no, really? Is that what you mean? So it's like five women, but it's called the milieu. Yeah, just five people. Okay. And why is it called the milieu? That's nothing against women. I think he was trying to rhyme it with the view. Right.

Right? Yeah. We're all in agreement. Milieu has nothing to do with a viewpoint. Not really. How would you say it? What does milieu mean to you? Can you give us a definition? That's a great, that should be topic number one on the milieu.

Exactly. Isn't just things that means things. We're going to have a Bush daughter of some sort, whether it's a granddaughter. Yeah, you should. Yeah. You should. That's the one requirement. As far as I understand.

I almost called you babe, Doug. Oops. How are you doing? I'm doing very well. Thank you. Everything's good. Things are really great at work. A lot of people are getting prescriptions. Okay. That means business is booming. Cha-ching. You see a lot of that, right? Well, I get a commission. That seems almost not right. Well, I don't have to do anything. I just get a commission on a certain amount of if there's if we go over a certain amount

of prescriptions filled, then I can. Do you have like a sign on the wall? Like you know, like a ticker just to show if you if you push enough pills every month Okay, we do what no we don't push the pills. They come to us. Of course not. Of course. They come to us Sure, we're not allowed to offer them, you know, I suggest anything It's these doctors of a stranglehold on what you're allowed to take They have their little pieces of paper and then we fill them. And we are allowed to roll our eyes, of course. Yes.

But for the most part, yeah, it's people come in and then we do have a ticker. And of course, when it goes, we buy pills. So when it hits, I would say it hits a million pills and then we reset. Whoa, that's a lot. And so think about how many pills are in a bottle. I mean, I guess. Think about how many bottles. I mean, I guess. And figure out how many bottles. I mean, I'm thinking about it.

Okay, sure. All right. So when that happens. We hit a million pills, I would say, million pills dispensed. Sure. We probably hit that every two weeks. Yikes!

That seems high. That seems very high. It does. I don't know, I mean, that's what happens. But if you are the millionth, if you get the millionth pill, of course there's a big sound effect of trumpets and then confetti falls.

Okay. We all come out from behind the counter and we sing a song. Oh, like a birthday in a restaurant. Exactly. Wow, people enjoy this. Someone got the millionth pill. Someone got the pill. Someone got the millionth pill today.

Do you clap while you sing it? Of course they do. Someone got the millionth pill. Every note, on every note. And just so everybody remembers, Byrne can only sing one note. Yeah. So you're not getting the full version of the song. I like that you make millionth kind of two syllables.

Oh yeah. Yeah, you have to. That's my favorite part. You can't make it one. You could make it three. You could make it three. Do you ever have repeat winners? Like is there someone that-

That's happened a couple times. Okay. What's their story? Their stories are very sick. All right. Well, that was a joke. Like, is there someone that seems to win? Okay. What's their story? Yeah. Yeah. Like can you think? Their stories are very sick. Cool.

All right. Well that was a dead end. Feel bad about that. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I guess I walked right into it. I should have thought about it. I should have thought about it. Well, congratulations to you, I guess, cause you've been getting some, I guess,

extra bonuses. Yes. And condolences to the neighborhood. Oh, God. People are not doing well. But a lot of these pills, of course, they're not life-threatening conditions. Sure, they're not for life-threatening conditions, yes. Yeah, yeah.

We are, we're selling a lot of sugar pills. Really? Yeah. For experiments. We're selling a lot of sugar pills. Really? Yeah. For experiments? I don't know what people are doing with them, but we do, that's the one thing that we're sort of allowed to sell without a prescription. Are these like placebos where like, you know, someone will just say, yeah, I'll go pick

that up for you. And it's someone who doesn't really need the medicine, but you just make up a name and then they just take it and immediately feel better. Like in the bird cage. Do you remember what I'm talking about? I don't. Again, everybody, we're not a movie podcast

and yet at least five movies get brought up in every single podcast. That's very true. And it's usually a movie that we have a very limited memory of. It's usually a movie I've seen one time when it came out. We can boil down the concept that we remember to five minutes. That's right.

In this case, Hank Azaria, who plays Nathan Lane's characters, sort of like Butler, gives him Pirin tablets. He just scratches the A and the S off. And so he just gives them, it's funny. It's funny, Bernie. I put it together. Yeah. Like that? It's funny, Bernie. I put it together and yeah. Like that?

Honestly, I was thinking of Angus Harrier's character in the birdcage and how will that hold up? I know, it's a little problematic. No, definitely already not. All of his characters hold up. What was the shelf life of that guy? Unassailable accents. So is it like that where people are sort of using like, what are they using them for?

I mean, some people will tell us and some people won't. Okay. And some people will say, I just want to get used to the idea of taking pills because I know I'm going to have to later. What a strange thing. They're training to take pills. Yeah. It's like young people say, I know when I get older, I'm going to have to take a bunch of pills every day. I never had that thought. You never had that thought? Never did growing up. I think the older you get, the more pills you have to take. So many pills. It can be.

You know what I would like to get into? I'm trying to, I mean, right now, everything's on hold with the shoot. My twins are shooting a pilot for me in my home that they wrote for me called Mr. Doubtfire. And they've abandoned the one-shot idea. They wanted to do hour-long episodes with just one shot, but they kept getting the shot shot and it was just,

and I hated all the tape all around my floor for them to stand there in one place. I'm talking of course about my, my boys, Matt and the center man. What did I say? The center man? What did I name him? The center man. So it was, you know, Doug wanted to name them the lawnmower man. He had just read the book. From the book? Yeah, the book. Well, the movie's straight.

So much better than the movie. The movie's straight greatly from the book. Is it a Stephen King? Yes, it is. It's like a short story. It's one of them short stories. And the book is better than the movie? Doug thinks so.

Okay. Yeah, can you believe it? Which part? That you think so or that? Well, which part did you believe? And, and I was talking, and I was, when I was pregnant with the boys, I was eating a lot of cinnamon.

Sure. And so I was a little bit out of it when I was saying the names. What do you mean? You're just taking spoonfuls of cinnamon? Yeah. Like the challenge? I was doing the cinnamon challenge before it was a challenge.

Oh, when I saw these people doing it later, I was like, you bunch of pussies. Oh, my God. Pregnant women. Pregnant women. Oh, that's a swear word. I get one swear word an episode. That's ridiculous. Not a swear word. I shouldn't say that. I should. I don't like it when people use the word pussy to indicate weakness. You keep saying it.

I think you just want to say it. Bert had a real seizure. It really made me recoil. I can say it if I want to. I'm sorry. You guys are so uncomfortable with the female anatomy. Now that, now Joan. Now Joan. Let's forget the pussy. You said it again.

I can't stop saying it. All right. What were you asking me? Okay. About the pussy. You said it again. I can't stop saying it. All right, what were you asking me? Okay, about the cinnamon. Oh, pregnant women can eat as much cinnamon without repercussion. Yes, it's a little known fact. For those nine months, that's still known. There's something about our glands

that they don't dry out like they do in a normal person. What's the repercussion otherwise? If you're not pregnant. Have you seen the cinnamon challenge? Haven't you seen the cinnamon challenge? Have you seen the videos? People die doing that. They swallow a tablespoon of cinnamon dry

and they choke because it takes away all the... Oh, so it's not the cinnamon, it's the choking. Yes, baby. Okay. So it's not the water in your lungs, it's like, stop breathing. He's been a little behind on the challenges. He's kind of trying to think of his own.

Like he was doing a peppercorn challenge. Tell me about that. I love the peppercorn challenge. That's where you shove, you- You do what? He did start with shove. You have to keep going, babe. I heard shove.

You heard shove. You shove two, you shove two bendy straws up your nose. Okay. Shove them up there. You must. It won't work otherwise. You shove them, you pinch them first, shove them up. Pinch them and shove.

The bendy straw comes out, hooks out of your nose. Somebody else blows peppercorns up the bendy straws into your nose. When you say hooks out of your nose, what does that mean? Well, talking about the bendy part, you know, maybe, yeah. Right? Well, I was talking about the bendy part, you know, a little, yeah, right. I was talking about the bendy part.

This is the part of the straw. It's more of a practical thing. Does it go through your nasal cavity and then come out your mouth? What happens? No, it's just so the person blowing can just face you rather than get under. Oh, I see. You're just sticking it up your nose to the elbow part of the straw. Yes, I got it Just the bendy part.

Yes. I got it. The bendy part hooks out. It's still a lot of straw. It sure is. That's a lot of straw to be putting in your nose. Oh, okay. Yes.

Yeah. For some reason, you're supposed to put the long end up your nose and just the short end out. I don't know why you're talking about it. You invented this one. So I don't know for some reason you're supposed to. This is yours. Now I'm realizing I should put the short end up

then the long end. I think you should just not do it at all, babe. I just think you should do it at all. Don't wanna be poking your own brain with a straw. Listen, I hate all these challenges. The straw, you get hung up on the straws, but the real challenge is the peppercorn. Sure.

What happens with peppercorn? You try not to sneeze. Okay, all right. So anyways, the whole point of this was is that I wanted to name them Matt and Cinnamon and Doug heard it wrong. And I was sleeping when he was giving the names and then the lady, the nurse wrote down Sinner Man.

Oh no, this happens all the time. Yes, this is when Doug was in his cowboy phase and he was talking in a Southern accent. So it was just misunderstood. Sinner Man. That sounds like it would actually sounded like that sounded like cinnamon. That actually sounded more like cinnamon. It's been a while since he's done the accent. Sinner man. There it is.

But were you trying to say cinnamon? I think he was. Oh dear. Anyways, I don't know why I started talking about the boys. Oh, we were talking about the pharmaceuticals. And so what I've been trying to get into, because right now they're sort of at a standstill. They're doing a rewrite. Not a page one? Oh no.

A page one rewrite? Oh boy. And they have to, they don't even know what that means though. So they're doing a rewrite and I page one Page one rewrite. Uh-huh. Oh boy, and do they have to they don't even know what that means though. So don't tell them So I've been trying to get into Songs for pharmaceutical commercials, you know because some of them are really fun fun. And the oh, I love that one. Which one is that? I think it's Jardians. OK. And they're like, control means everything to me. And it's just it's really.

Control means everything to me. What is showing? Is that really what it says? It's just that right now there's a huge market for Plexoriosis pharmaceuticals. That's hard to say. And so I'm trying to think of like my own, you know, so it's like I, so I don't know. Maybe I either want to be the singer or I want to write the jingles, you know, because I just think there's a huge, it's a huge market for it. You know, every other commercials for Plexoriosis, it seems like, which isn't a laughing matter because I mean, my's a huge, it's a huge market for it, you know? Every other commercials for plexorizes, it seems like.

Which isn't a laughing matter because I mean, my father had it, eye of eczema all the time. All the time. It's just it moves around my body. I had it on my eyelids last week, I'm not kidding. Yeah, it really sucked. Oh no. It kind of looked like I already had eyeshadow on,

so that was a little bit nice. Oh, okay, save some money. Cosmetics are expensive. So, yeah, I'll be like walking around the house listening to that song and I'm just like, you know, this is a great, I think there need to be more songs like this because I actually think,

I would say that a lot of people are coming into your pharmacy because of that song. Oh, I don't doubt it. And let me tell you something. We have a thing now. I can't believe I didn't tell you this, because you might be able to to be part of this as well. OK. We take a lot of the we play a sort of role playing game. Me and the gang at work and we create characters

and worlds based on the names of different pharmaceuticals. Because they sound sort of mythological. Elaborate and almost unethical. Why? Well, because you're taking real people's names and sort of... No, we're not. No, we're taking the names of the medications. You're taking the names of medications.

Because they sound... Could you give me an example? They sound like mythological. So it's like... Okay, so like what? Be appropriate on. Summon the Giardians. We must capture the Eskitalasipram.

Oh, that's my least favorite. Don't they sound like, you know what I mean? They just threw a bunch of letters in a bucket and then decided to name it that generic. My God, that is just an insult. They punish you with the generic name sometimes. Guess what? You don't get the generic. You get this word, salad.

And it probably doesn't work as good. And it could be a sugar pill And how long do you play this for is this something you do often we played after work we play like your Dungeons and Dragons I Guess like that. I'm sorry what babe Vraylar Vraylar Do you know it? Yeah, that's um Are you just googling names of pharmaceuticals? It's an antidepressant.

He wouldn't do that. It's an antidepressant. Brailler. That does sound like the hero of a story. I have to say. Yes. And he's in love with the fair Luna Stra. Oh, that's a good one.

And what's the one that really bothers me because it's all these people having lovely lives, but they're like, you don't know, he's in heart failure. And they're dancing and they just show their heart, which is in terrible distress. And we're supposed to be happy for these people, but they're just walking around going, he's dying and he's dying, but not really, thanks to this pill. I find it very rude.

That is, do you think the people don't know they're in the commercial? I think so, I'll tell you what, I have gotten so red pill, blue pill about this. I've gotten so freaked out that whenever I'm on a sailboat or taking a hike or just hanging out with July P on the beach, I'm like, am I in a commercial right now? Wow. Am I, am I not okay? What do I have wrong with me? That's right, babe. He's still trying to make sense of that movie. He really is. He walked from one town to the other to see if he would run

into the end of the town when he saw that movie. Cause he was so worried. Which movie? I don't know. Truman Show. Truman Show. That was years ago, but you just- That boat hit that sky and it broke his brain. Let me tell you.

I mean, you're the one who thinks you're in the commercial these days. I'm just saying. Okay, babe. That was years ago. I thought I was in the Truman who thinks you're in the commercial these days. I'm just saying. OK, babe. That was years ago. I thought I was in the drama show. It's getting personal. He got you there.

I'm just trying to level it set. My hat is still on my chest. Oh, OK. So I come to you. All right. Well, can you tell us how long we've been talking, babe, because it's probably time for our guest. Here he goes again. We have a couple minutes. Preactivity period. Oh, that sounds like the song you sing to

the people in the pharmacy. You have the millionth pill. You have the million pill. 24. Is it actually the tune of you have the millionth pill, the millionth pill. You have the millionth pill, the millionth pill. Oh, you have the millionth pill, the millionth pill. The millionth pill, the millionth pill. You have the millionth pill. What is that song from? Is that Fantasia? No, what is that song?

What am I humming? Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. This is how I'm finding out our millionth pill song is a weird owl. Is it from a movie? It's not a weird owl. Maybe our guest a movie? It's not a weird owl. Maybe our guests will know. Maybe.

Let's ask them. I doubt it. All right. We should take a break. We should take a break. What was that? Nothing. I was just thinking about that song, whether it's Hungarian Rhapsody or not.

It is definitely not Hungarian Rhapsody. Is that a real song? Hungarian Rhapsody is the source material. Does every country have its own rhapsody? Again, rhapsody is the source material. Does every country have its own rhapsody? That one song has so many cartoon classics within one song. Oh, do you know what I think it is? I think it's Peter and the Wolf. That's what it is.

A tale as old as time. That's what it is. It is Peter and the Wolf. The Wolf. That's what the song is. Okay, great. Peter and the Wolf. All right, we should take a break, Bernd.

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using our exclusive code TNL at Huell.com. Please see the description for the terms and conditions. Skip the stress, not the nutrition. Try Huell today for complete nutrition bottled. Oh yeah, it's Jay and I'm coming at you with a for free $1 Kititson gift card. I didn't realize there's only a dollar left and I don't need anything from Kitson. I never have and I never will. Let me tell you the story about this card. It was given to me by someone who thought I would shop at Kitson. Now this person didn't know me very well because I'm the kind

of guy that goes out of his way to avoid Kitson, if you know what I mean. Hey nothing against Kitson if you'd like to shop there, and if you do, I've got a dollar for you for free. But something about Kitson doesn't suit Jay's vibe, you know what I'm saying? I'm a guy who, when I shop, I go to places that How I put this aren't kitson And I think I'm known for that so it was very surprising to me that someone said hey Jay I got a gift for you. It's a gift Get a gift card and that's a direct quote the person did

Sort of hesitate there. I try to say gift and Kitson at the same time. I feel sorry for guys like that. Anyway, this guy had a big ol' smile on his face and I had to, uh, I had to accept a card because I'm a gracious person. That's just the way JEE does things. But when I looked at how much was on the gift card, and it was $10,000, I thought, what am I going to do here?

I can't shop at Kitson, but $10,000? That's nothing for Jay to sneeze at. So here's what I did. I got some neighborhood kids to go to Kitson. And I said to these kids, go nuts. Buy whatever you want at Kitson. Shop in the kids' department or the adults' department. Whatever they'll let you do. Just spend all of it. But leave me something on there. You choose the amount.

And then I'll take it from there. And folks, these little ragamuffins, for that's what they were, they spent a nine hundred and ninety-nine dollars. They spent $999 plus the rest of it, except for $1. And that's where we are right now. Me, with the $1 Kitstin gift card, giving it to you for free. I pray and I hope and I swear that it's not going to be the person who gave me the $10,000 Kitstin gift card in the first place. But if it is, I think you understand Jay a little bit better now. All right, Dingly

Falls out. Welcome back to the neighborhood listen. Well, Joan, it's that time again. As always, we scour the neighbor app, the social networking application for neighborhoods, and we look for interesting people in our neighborhood to talk to. Maybe some people have a problem, maybe they have a message they want amplified. Maybe they just want to hang out.

Yeah, sometimes that's the case. And we, so we get these. You get what? Burnt, what is happening? Babe, I don't know what's going on with you two. Well, you know what? I short-circuited a little bit. Oh, did you?

Yeah, I did. It's been a while, but yes, I was hovering above my body. Oh, that happens. Sometimes when Burnt is talking and sort of going through the housekeeping of our podcast, he floats above his body, looks down. If I get, sometimes what'll happen is I'll get fixated on a certain word.

Okay, what was it this time? I think it was posts. Really? Just a pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss and then, there you go, your soul leaves your body. Okay, well go on, you're fine. Here's what happens. So we look at the neighbor app, we try to find people to talk to, and then we bring them in to talk to them. Well explained.

If you have a post that you think we've overlooked, why don't you screenshot it from the neighbor app and send it to us at bernandjohn at gmail.com. Like this listener did, this listener named, I guess this is a real name, Mitch Silpa. What? Okay, I'll buy it. Mitch Silpa. Mitch Silpa. I mean, you can use pseudonyms if you want. That's fine. If you don't want to give us your real name, make up a cartoon name. Fine. He wants to be mysterious. Yeah, Mitch Silpa. So this, Mitch found

this one in the recommendations section and this is someone named Mary. Mary writes, explain to me a newcomer to America. This is considered the norm here. If they write to you, you answer and after that you just remain silent and do not answer anything for question marks. Horror, nightmare, such disrespect, just tin for Four exclamation marks. Why write about work at all if then they ignore me? Three question marks, three exclamation points. It's better not to write at all if you don't need my services.

Don't waste my time. Sorry, I'm just outraged by the behavior of Americans. Whoa! Wow, this is a hot post. It sure is. We've never had anyone in this angry. Never, never. Please welcome to the show, Mary.

Mary, hello. Mary, hello. Thank you for responding. Oh, you're welcome. You sent this inquiry for people to come visit you with these problems, and I said, I'd like to come in and you wrote back to me. Thank you very much, Americans. I'm so glad that you wrote back to me. Thank you very much Americans. I'm so glad that we wrote back to you.

We do want to be good Americans. I don't understand this protocol you have here where you just you you you talk to someone and then you die. Oh, well that's an interesting way to sum it up. And yeah, let's let's let's get into this Mary because yeah're talking about something that you're presenting as if it's a very commonplace occurrence, but I don't really know what you mean. Yes, this is what I was going to ask too, Bernd. How often are you used to writing letters and receiving them? How used to it are you? How used am I in my home country?

In your home country. Yes, where are you from? The Mipos. Yes. Oh, that really tickled Yeah, so where are you from? Mipos. Yes, oh that really tickled her. You are from the island of Mipos. I'm from Mipos. Oh Mipos, oh and her accent came in. Accent was there previously. I had to-

Accent was there previously. Oh I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Listen to me. You are from America? I am definitely. You are from America? I'm from America, yes. You are from America? Oh that's America, yes. You're from America?

Oh, that's to you, babe. Said to me? Yes. Oh, just to get the wall. Sorry, I addressed this oil portrait. That was the correct thing to do, Mary. Yeah. Because the eyes are cut out.

So I don't blame you. Can you answer? Oh, yes. I definitely am. Yes. I forgot the question. What is it? The question was, in your home country of Mipo, how regular is it to receive letters and to write them to people?

So, when I was betrothed in school. Oh, we're going way back. In school? In 1617, you pick a partner. Oh, really? I, of course, write a letter to my chosen mate. Okay. All right.

I expect you did this as well. No, not a custom we have here necessarily. And this is why your country is, as we say, going to shit. Well, listen, I'm not gonna argue with you there at the moment, but I just have to sort of point out that you are aware, and I would assume unless your hometown, home country, is really steeped in the past, we have devices now that have sort of negated the need

for writing on a piece of paper, people text people, call people, connect through messaging on apps. Are you familiar with that? Listen to what you're saying. Listen to what you're saying. I mean, I am trying to. How did you get this complaint in the first place? You think I don't know what an app is?

Okay, so you're angry about those. I myself put this onto neighbor app. Okay, so we're not talking about physical letters. We're talking about everything. Physical letters. Any kind of communication. But also, this is not happening only in America, Bernd, right? I mean, every country has these cell phones.

Everybody's on their screens. Everyone has this. We used to write letters. Well, yes we did. How do you spell this burnt first name? B-U-R-N-T. Oh, this is the name of my uncle. Well, that's interesting because also-

This is an ethnic name from me, both. Because isn't me a payday Ithican? Is that correct? Ithican. From Ithaca? Oh, like old Ithaca. Yes, of course. Sorry, no. Where is it?

It's Corsican. Corsican. Okay. My name is Burnt. I got it wrong. I got it wrong. Corsican. Burnt is connected to my family through Mepos and Crete.

Interesting. Well, you both have some sort of Greek backgrounds. Cretan, Croisus, Croatian. Croisus. Never worry. Rich as Croisus. That's right. Very rich. It's a great candy. If I could find a Reese's creases here. I just know that has black liquorice in it. Yeah, it does. It's beautiful. It's peanut butter cups with black liquorice. It's peanut butter and robed in black licorice.

Delicious. And folded up to make the creases. Oh boy. And it's wrapped in gold foil. Yeah, it's so fancy. And that comes from the ancient myth of when the peanut butter Falcon ran into the licorice forest. Oh yes, definitely.

And they turned a corner and he turned a corner That's right. And the peanut butter Falcon got his peanut butter Cused each other instantly they sure did you got you know, they were in love instantly, of course It was a match made in heaven now. Okay So so then my question is if you're blaming Americans for this, you know this happens in other countries. Everyone's on the apps, right? Why are you singling out Americans? So I have an American niece.

OK. And my American niece told me, oh, Uncle Mary, this is just what we call ghosting. Everyone ghost. And that's why I say I write you a letter, then you die. You say that. Well, how do you become a ghost? Oh, I see. Because you feel like that's what happens.

And what you're saying is that you don't get ghosted as well? I mean, I've never been ghosted. Joan. Right. Calm down. I have a very active thread with my mom friends. And here's the thing. It's different with moms because a mom understands that you might not hear back from that person for two weeks. And it's just because they literally turned to get some drink for Some kid and then two weeks went by you know, it's funny

I have a very and you understand you don't we don't hold grudges you get back to us when you get back to us I have an actor through with my mom's friends It's really wonderful is it just a lot of forwards of forwards of forward emails Yes, it is and they say that a lot of the same things many times over. But it's nice. It's nice to keep up with them. I think this may not be a divide between country and nation. Oh, well certainly it's not that. I don't know if that's possible.

It might just be because I think the two of you have stable jobs. You are not freelance, eh? I am not. Oh, there's a little bit of a Canadian accent in not freelance, eh? I am not. Oh, there's a little bit of a Canadian accent in there too. No, I'm not, I'm not freelance. Of course, so I am a freelancer. I provide freelance services.

I have my whole life. Oh, what do you do? I do a variety of things. One, I am a travel agent. Oh, okay. Two, I can do tax returns. You can do tax returns. I'm also an architect.

Whoa. Okay whoa and furniture maker okay minutes and also a software developer Wow I'm technically I made no code developer what does that mean which means I will create software without using programming drag-and-drop exactly what is that burnt sorry babe what is blessings thank you very much Doug not. Not even in the room. I'll be the one to say it. Not even in the room. I capture your spirit.

Oh. Oh, no. Mary just like caught burnt sneeze. Oh, no. I wish you hadn't done that. Yep. I think you should wash your hands. So my blessings didn't work with your philosophy?

No, you could bless. Because the reason you say that is to block someone taking your spirit. Yeah, but you have to be in the same room. Oh, my portrait doesn't work? You can't see I have taken out an enameled black lacquer box. You're hiding, you're encasing the sneeze into a box. That is wild. I won't give back to Burn. Burn must bury them at some point.

Yeah, I will have to bury them. Okay, but I want to get back to this, to all the many jobs that you said you do or could do. That was a question mark. Four jobs. I think it was five. Did you train to do all of these jobs? Did you train to do all these jobs properly trained? Well, let's see. I must train to be an architect. You must be licensed in Meepos to be an architect. That's right. Sure, but that's not an answer. Does that license transfer here? No, I did trade. I did trade. Okay, great. So you did. Yes, the actual licensing exam in America is much easier than the MEPOs.

Well, that's not a surprise. Okay, so in MEPOs, you must know what a keystone for an arch is. Here you don't. I go to many firms here, I say, hey, we're gonna put the keystone. They say, what? Well, that's sort of a little dignity fell as court

because all the arches we have in town just have a space at the very top. They didn't, they could never figure out how to make the meat. And so that might just be specific to us. Make them meat. Oh, make them meat. We miss hear each other a lot on this podcast.

We really do. Well, this is an American symptom. Both of you thinking of what you're going to say next instead of listening to understand. Mary has cut us to the core. Definitely a problem for me. So this is an American symptom both of you thinking of what you're going to say next Mary has cut us to the core definitely a problem for me Wow Your business is a real estate and the arts and then some some measures you must reach out to a client who says oh I come by your home. That's always like everyone that talks to you starts with a big moan. Well, no.

It's kind of like when a president imitates anybody. That is an American. A lot of people moan in here. Yeah, that is a little bit cartoonish. But they say your home was so open. I walked around, I had some cheese, I will buy it. Generally, there's not, you know what I have to say with realty, it's a lot on us to follow up.

It's a lot of realty follow up because we're chasing the deal, right? We're chasing the sale. You are chasing ghosts. Oh wow, that is really. Wow. That's such a very sad way to put it, but in a way it's kind of true.

Yeah. Joan. What. Joan. What? Joan. What you said, who are you gonna call? Who are you gonna call? Oh, Joan, okay, yeah. Well, okay, I mean, I do feel like,

I know what you mean. I mean, you have leads, like Glenn Gary. That is right, yes, it's just like Glenn Gary, Glen Ross. It's just like that, it's just like that. But, you know, it's probably used mostly, this is because I have a teenage daughter, in dating. Like if a dude or a girl ghosts you, like one minute they say they love you,

the next minute, dot, dot, dot. And I don't really have that with my friends or my clients. Generally, if people are interested in a house, they are going to get back to me. You know what I mean? And if they don't respond, that answer is an answer. Right. You know, no answer is an answer in that kind of way. Someone who has only lived in a seller's market. You mean me?

Yeah. Yes. I generally refer to the person who's been speaking previously. Sure. I just didn't know. You know, you sort of have an interesting, ornate way of speaking and it's very philosophical. So I thought maybe you were talking about yourself. Speaking of which, I'd like to highlight this passage where you say,

horror nightmare, such disrespect, just tin. Yeah, you're so worked up about it. Well, it's like if you- Yeah, what is tin? Would you explain the tin part? If I were to come to you and buy a house

and I say, oh, I want to pay in tin, it means nothing. In meatballs, we have so much tin, it is tin everywhere. Oh. There's a lot of tin barons. It's like saying, in your, maybe vernacular you say like tissue. Or- Oh, I don't know.

What would we say? For me, it means nothing. For something that's common? Yeah, I would just say junk, I suppose. So tin is like junk. Dust? Yes, like in that movie, the Tin Man is worthless. He's absolutely...

Pleather. Oh, I never saw him. To me, he's made of trash. Pleather, babe? Pleather. Okay. I would say that. Now, you're talking about the Wizard of Oz?

Yes, it'd be like if a man walked up to me made of garbage. That's what the tin man. So like the Wiz? Yes. Exactly. The Wiz did much better in mepos than Wizard of Oz. That makes a lot of sense. So tin is just, you could just find it anywhere. And so it doesn't have value. My bed as a child was made of tin. Really? That sounds uncomfortable. It forms to your body.

Okay. The tin does. Did you have a tin roof? Rusted. Uh huh. Which meant my mother was pregnant. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. So she could eat cinnamon.

So, yes, that's right. So then, okay, so you came to talk about this and you're very unhappy about it, but usually people post because there was a specific incident that happened. Well, no, I posted the- Is there something that happened? Well, yes, of course.

Your question is, was, did someone not respond to me in a certain way? Yeah, or maybe did it- It seems like what you're saying is, people write to you, say, I need your services, whatever those services are. And then you write back and say, here's what it costs or here's what you do, or you ask for more information.

And then it's then just 10. Yes. Then just 10. Do you know the local magnate, his last name is Richmond. Oh yes. He wrote to me, he said, can you build me a community center up on the hill? Are you talking about Ritchie Richmond? Yes. Okay. And I am an architect. I said, can you build me a community center up on the hill? Are you talking about Richie Richmond?

Yes. Okay. And I am an architect. I said, do you want me to tax? I can do tax returns and you know, I can do no code developing and I can do travel agency. But this is after he asked, can you build me? He said, and of course I do travel agency. Well, I mean, you cannot not upsell your other services.

Oh, I understand. If they come to you, say architect, you also offer the other thing. Generally, I don't like if someone wants me to help them sell or buy a house. I'm like, I can also clean your teeth. I think that would be weird. This is why your life is full of tin. Oh, he just leveled a really hard. That did sound like a real.

If I come to you and I say I need some pills. Yes. You don't tell me the other things you can do. Well, no, that's my only job. Yeah. But do other talents you have. Do I have. All right. You know what he's doing. He's deflecting and he's not answering our question. That's exactly right. So this person, this person, basically the brutalist happened to you.

He said to make. I'm familiar with. I hope it didn't take as long. I'm familiar with what you're. He said, make a community senator. Make a community senator. Not a senator. And I said, yes, of course. And then I went ahead and made a bunch of,

I drew out many plans based on one email. On one email? Wow, okay, okay. I went to my drafting table and I made a very complex set of plans and scoped them all out and sent them back to him. And what do I hear back from this Richie Risen? You sculpted them.

I scoped them. Oh, scoped them. Like scoped in terms of a scope of project. And did it have like a gym and like inexplicably a church with a shadow cross and- It did have those things. Okay, interesting. Okay, and then what happened?

You didn't hear from him? I did not hear from him that is a little strange yeah that is strange i agree that is a lot of work so i hear you on that mary over four days went by wow i did not hear back so i got on neighbor help oh oh so so that's the incident. That was the inciting moment. That is the latest of many tin-filled incidents in my life. Can I ask, first of all, how long have you lived here? Because I'm assuming, did you grow up in Mepos and then move here? Yes, I moved, I live here now. Okay, and when did you, how long have you been here for?

Nine years. I've never seen either of you here in town. Then again, I never need a pill, I'm not sick. Oh, well, he did a little jig when he said that. You have to do that. He did a little jig. Well, in our culture, whenever you tempt spirits like that, you better be dancing.

I see. So they think it's an entertainment. Oh, OK. What an interesting world of myths and wonder me posts is. You felt like now is the time we do the dance of joy. That is one of the things. Why did you come here? What brought you here?

I came to find one of my cousins and then I gave up. Now wait a minute. That sounds a lot like ghosting. I think it sounds like something else. It does sound like I did. Did your cousin know that you were trying to find them? No, no. We have a lost cousin who we feel has violated our principles.

Oh, really? By living with a man. By living with a man? We have modern urban cities in Mipos. You do? OK. Well, because this thing that you just mentioned sounds very archaic. What does? Two men living together? Yes.

We don't have any two men live together, even if they are related. I would say that that that that's very old fashioned. Is it old fashioned or new fashioned? It's old fashioned. I think it's old fashioned for sure. Yeah. Well, my wife had twins. Congratulations. Well, twin boys. What are their names? George and Michael. Is it DeMichael or just George and Michael?

George and Michael. Okay. George and Michael. They must instantly be separated. One can live at home. Oh, even, even. That's horrible. They can't grow up together. What did I say? Get the tin out of your ears. No, I don't think this is tin. This is not, boy, I know you're giving Americans a real run around, but I don't think it's right that these two little boys would grow up apart

from each other because of some- Well, not too far. We have a little second house outside and they switch off week to week. They just can never sleep under the same roof. It's terribly confusing for them. Why? What is the idea? If two boys, two men sleep together,

think of the plans they will make. The plans they will make? Think of most bad things that have happened in the world. World War I, II, IV. Well, that wasn't from two boys having a sleepover. That started with two males talking to each other. Every one of the two men in the same room talking to each other.

I mean, I won't disagree with you there. Everything evil has started from them. But then also good things have come out of that. That is true. Like what? Oh boy, where do we start, Bert? Oh, the Atari? The Apple computer?

I... Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Oh, I love that's where you both went. Um... Forget the war rooms. Anyways. Well, you asked for good things. Oh my goodness.

Ah, see, warmonger American. We say, what's a good thing? That was where they brokered peace and a victory. Oh, sure. That's what I'm talking about. Churchill. Anyways, I know he was an American. Churchill.

That's what it is. Churchill. Churchill. Churchill. Churchill. Get in here right American. Churchill, is that what it is? Churchill. Churchill. Churchill. Give me your rat now. Churchill and Chinaman. Churchill.

So what I do feel like is also, Doug asked earlier, I did hear you, he wondered if he had a workaround for the two boys. Like do you have a doggy door or a flap between the two fences in the backyard? Actually, you can put, technically hang a curtain between in their room and call it two houses. Yeah, I had a feeling.

A lot of old cultures with rules like that. It's from the walls of Jericho. I would stop at cult, honestly. I hate to say this, but a sheet in the middle of the room. I'm sorry, one second, I'll go and get Mary. A lot of old cultures do what, Doug? Just have, you know, like with lots of rules and systems in place, they develop little work arounds.

Oh, like soaking. Like soaking. Exactly. All right. So let's move on from that. Like on the weekend, we cannot start any fires in the town center. Because of the Billy Joel song? But if we start, yes.

That was originally a folktale from our country. Oh boy. In fact, did you know most of those events listed happened in Meepos first? I'm not sure that's correct. Children of Philemon? A lot of them. No, the Cola Wars. The Cola Wars.

Cola Wars. We were starting in Meepos. I forgot about that later. Listen, I don't want to talk too much about this because many people died in the Cold War. No way. Okay. All right. Between Pepsi. Yeah. I know many both inside of the Cold War.

Yes. Well, what people don't acknowledge... 50 bothins. People don't acknowledge the people that fought for RC. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Winners are at the history. The lost battalion. Yeah. OK, so I I'm trying to focus here because you

there was an inciting incident which was you sending. I've not heard from this Richmond since then. Right. This Richie Richmond. OK, it's only been four days. I will say I always give a week before a follow-up. I don't know about you, Burnt, but I do. Unless it's an emergency. I mean, as a pharmacist, we never have to contact anyone who needs our services. We talk to doctors, but we don't really talk to the people coming in to get the prescription. What about when you have a patient and the insurance goes crazy and the patient comes in,

oh, I have a problem with my medicine and it's paying too much. And then you have to call the insurance and wait for them to make a new determination about. Yeah, but it's always no. And then that's the only time we talk to the people is right there at the counter. I guess they call in on the phone sometimes.

We never call them. Let me ask you. We do have a thing set up where it's like, if you'd like us to call you back instead of staying on hold, leave your number. But you know what I don't like about that, Burton? I'm sorry. I'm really going to get into this. I will say CVS was worse at this. And the first lady would come back and she'd say, are you still there? Which I felt was very rude and just rubbing it in. And the entire time I would be on the phone with her, I would be actively trying to get online and that wasn't working either. And she would say, you can always go online. I was like, what if I can't lady? What if I can't, what if that's not working?

That's why at the, at the falls, Missy, our recording, if you stay on hold, it says, I hear you breathing. And it's fun. I mean, I guess that's better, but I would rather talk to a real person. Press one if you're still breathing. That's no, that's very confusing. We used to have that. That wasn't entirely... They replaced it by just saying, call 911. We really glossed over this cousin thing. You showed up, you were looking for your long lost cousin because I guess you wanted to stop him

from living his lifestyle. Then you gave up. Then you stay. Can you explain that? Why do you stay here? Because I came here and I mean, there are many tempting things about American culture. Okay. Like what? That's true. Like a. Atari.

Atari. Apple. I went to the Chipotle. Oh, sure. Okay. Which is very ours is called the Chipotle. We have a Trader Joe and we have a Coco's, but it's it just serves hot cocoa and mushroom burgers. What is a Coco's? C O C O A S. That's our own specific one.

Normally it's like a Denny's. If you've heard of Denny's, it's C O C O. It's in a lot of places, but we have a place called Coco's. We also have a Trader Joe, not a Trader Joe's. And we have The Chipotle. Well, I- Which is a seafood restaurant. By the way, you're all welcome to join me tomorrow.

I'll be going to your Trader Joe. Oh, okay. Because they're selling- You're welcome to join you. That seems- I mean, I only say this because I will be there at 4 a.m. They're not open then. You have to get in line.

Dear, your young little dear. I mean, I don't mind being called young. You do sound like a young little dear. Thank you. You must be there at 4 a.m. to get in line for the mini tote bag. I have heard about this. Which will be released tomorrow at your Trader Joe's.

But that's the problem is that every day it's only one bag that they give away. Yeah. So I don't even know why people wait in line. Whoever got there first, why do they wait? And it's a mini tote bag. So it's like mini tote bag, so it's like you can barely carry anything.

You can put it on your key chain. So you feel like you wanna be the one to get the mini tote bag this year. Yeah, well that is one of my, that's my sixth freelance business, is drop shipping mini tote bags back to Meepos. Really? We have this national fruit.

It's called the comquato. It's relative to the one you know, but smaller. There's like a comquat with a little comquat. I knew that question was coming. Yes, babe. But the one on the front is dormant, generally dormant. Dormant, generally dormant. But you put it in the Trader Joe mini tote bag.

It can awaken and tell you about the resistance plans. Wow, resistance plans? What do you think Quanto is for? Well, but what's going on in me post that you don't need a resistance plan and everything was perfect there? Well, no, why do you think I left? I'm here.

I know, but you complain about America all the time. That's all you've done, stupid. That's all you've done. That. That's all you've done. That's what you did in this post. First of all, what I love about the two of you is you grew up here, and so you're not used to, in every other country in the world, we like to complain. That is the way of life.

Okay. Nobody complains here in America. You have nothing to complain about. You've never been ghosted, you've never had to buy a bag in the morning Whatever that means I Have bags in the morning. So believe me that's worse to deal with so Occasionally there are resistance plans and you get the mini tote bag

Quanto in and then Quanto will wake up and what a casual way to talk about resistance plans. Oh And by the way, if you're that's why the resistance isn't going that well. It's a casual resistance. I think the resistance plans are getting ghosted from time to time. I think that's what's going on. That is a big problem. Actually, sometimes they say we're going to do flash mob town square. Everybody bring your weapon and then you get there.

No one shows up. I think a flash mob of just a ghosting. I am used to it, am I happy with it? And has it been anywhere worse than America? No. But you're making it sound like it's a uniquely American issue, but it is something you've experienced before. This level here though is something else.

I mean, I've, I've tasted a baked pie before, but then I came here and I had McDonald's. The apple pie? Yes. Oh. On a different level. I mean, that's still a baked pie though. It might not taste good.

I went to Jollibee and they had a fried pie. How about that? Does that fit your analogy? You gotta go to New Barn. They have the Starburst pie. They do have a pie made entirely of Starburst. You have to carry it home. You have to go to New Barn.

New Barn? New Barn is the neighbor town. One of them. They talk like a vampire sort of New Englander. That's a weird accent. Their accent is a mixture of Crackula and someone from New England. They're so smug.

They're very smug. I have to say, I envy the two of you because it seems like in your lives now, you don't have a lot of need or expectation from others that they could disappoint you on. I suppose that's true. That is true, especially when it comes to my children. But yes, I guess that is true.

Well, I don't have expectations of them anymore. I just want them to be alive. Yes, that makes sense. Wait, do they still live with you? They do now, actually. Everyone's back in the home. Yes, they do. And yes, my boys share a room.

Okay, I don't care. I don't want you to put a sheet up in my home. I don't have a problem with it. Well, no problem. You're not from Mipos. You don't share my religion. So you can stay together. What is your religion, by the way?

What is the religion of Mipos? Sorry to question you. Thank you, Bern. It's Miposian. Miposian. Miposian. Mhmm, Bern. It's me-po-sian? Me-po-sian. Me-po-sian. Mm-hmm. Standard.

Like in America. So you're standard Me-po-sian. Well, America was discovered by Christopher Columbus, so you're Christians. Well. It's a simple, that just. Is that not how, not the origin of it? There's a lot of, I don't think so.

I don't really think anyone likes to go with that version of history anymore. Columbus what? Columbus bread. Isn't that a bread company? Probably. We can pass that. Sometimes I think Doug wishes we didn't hear him and follow up.

But if your children ever go, where did they leave and come back to from with how, when? Wow, that's a lot of all the prepositions. Well, if you must know, they were, they were... I simply must. They were trying to get into the industry a little bit, the television industry, they had sold a pilot to the Chick-fil-A streaming network. And they were in LA for a little bit, but then they came back here to shoot

a prank your parents pilot, they did it in my own home, and it didn't get picked up. Now let me ask you, when they were gone, did you ever call them and they didn't call you back? Oh, I mean that happened in the home. I mean, they hid from me for months at a time in my house. So, you know, I've been, you could say I've been ghosted. They hid in the walls.

So that's not going to work on me friend, because honestly I have not known where they were so many times since they were born. Again, I didn't even know where the second baby was. What's his name again? I can't remember. Oh, that's right. I didn't even know the center man was there.

He was hiding. I gave birth to him a full 24 hours later. Yeah. They were twins, identical twins born one day apart. I did hear this and you were going, why did you? You heard this, how did you hear this? Outside, outside. Of the hospital room hospital room no in the green room before i came into the oh yes we actually do have a green room that is set in an alternate reality with a

timeline a luxurious green room yes doug built that he built that for all of our guests i have the the broadcast going into the green room is a monitor there is a monitor in there. Oh, fun. And it's telling the history of the place. So go on. So you heard about it. It's not a simulcast of the episode. But it's also, it's got a little trivia about us as well. I don't remember talking about them being born separately, but I guess you heard that. Okay, go on.

All I heard was the name Sinner Man. That's all I was referring to. I know nothing of this, you know, obstigenical history. Obstigenical? Obstigenical? Obstigenical? Hahaha. Of a posian term.

Oh, I mean that is, listen, that is the problem. I do want to ask this, of all the different fields that you are engaged in, do you consider one to be your primary area of expertise? Well I make money, I don't make money at all from my primary which is I'm a mover. A mover. That didn't even come up. It never came up. I don't mean that I'm a move, I move your things. I mean my in space. Oh you're a dancer. My body in space moves. And you get paid for that? No no no, no. That's what I'm saying. My passion is this. Oh, okay.

Yeah. Cause you didn't even list it. And do you mean dance? Dance, I would say is a subset of what I do. I mean, if I had to define dance, I would say you move through space. That's what I would say. Or to music. Move through space.

That's what I would call it. I am agreeing with you, Bernd. Right. If somebody didn't know what dance was. That's right. We do. We do. And so I'd like to know what do you do?

If I, you were singing, we do it is something, it is something I agree. It is. I tell you what, it is something that just ground everything to all. Are you singing a song from the stone cutters episode of the Simpsons? Yes, absolutely. Okay. I'm sure he forgot what we were talking about. Move through space. What do you mean?

Where do you do this? Well, that's why, if I, and this is why, I would never list this as a profession of mine. Okay. Because in America, what I would have to, I would have to pour my form into a little box that you call dance. But. I would say that dance is really pushed outside the box

like crazy. It's a very broad term. It sure is. It encompasses a lot of things. Wait, do you mean pushed out in terms of commerciality? I just think that people have pushed the boundaries of dance and it's actually, it's an art form that's been really thriving here.

I see, okay, yes. I mean, I guess in a certain way, I would consider theater a form of dance What way is that? Well, when you pay for a ticket to see a play do they not get up on stage and move about? Yeah, but I wouldn't describe it as dancing But they move they And they have say it's moving through space and they have I think we're between a rock and a hard place with this one

I don't think there's gonna be any movement.. They have preplanned the movements and they are coordinated with each other in the movements. Okay, sure. And then they happen to say things while they do it. But why are we picking this apart so much? I just wanted to know. Joan, I don't know. I guess that you would call- Because I asked him if he was a dancer and he-

Yes, I said- Then we got this. Yes, yes, yes. So I'm saying if it comforts you, he... Yes, I said... Then we got this. Yes, yes, yes. So I'm saying if it comforts you, you can say what I do is dance. It does comfort me. Thank you very much. I'm comforted.

Honestly, Uncle Barry, we just need something to grab on to. That's right. That's what we're trying. Why? What is this American thing about grabbing? This is your colonization. I think that you put a lot of things on America and listen, again, we are far from criticism, especially at this moment or at any time, frankly.

Far from above criticism. Far from, what did I say? You said we're far from criticism at this moment. No, just criticism right here in front of you. You're not very far from it. That definitely came out wrong. Now I feel criticized. How, when was Dignity False founded?

What year? Oh wow, I mean, it's an old, I mean, it goes back to Druid days. That's true. That is canon. We did establish that. Oh, then I must figure, I thought you had a much more modern history.

I didn't know you. They only discovered that stuff, you know, or like in my childhood, you know, so it wasn't known for a very long time. But Diggity Falls as a community does predate America. It does, it absolutely does. Yes, it does. Well then, I mean, maybe I have been,

as you say, barking up the wrong tree. If in a way you are not America, you have been subsumed by America, but you yourself are not Americans. We are our own little place. Dignity Falls really does have its own rules and set of quirks. But there's no place like it.

There's just no place like it. That's Dignity Falls for you. I mean, I would say the people around you then are the Americans and you are not. Wow. And this is what I would say to you. They do not want us here. They do not want us here. I feel like you're taking over the podcast a little bit. I feel like the tables have turned. Yeah, we're talking about something else now. I know. Well, I really wanted to stay with you. Sure. I wanted to stay with you. I want to know if you're with anybody. We didn't even talk about no code development. I just want to loop you in, in case occasionally we have resistance plans.

Remember, they occasionally happen. They occasionally happen. But you were going to ask about his home life? Yes. Do you live alone? Have you found a romantic partner? Do you have a roommate? No, no, no roommate. Here I do live alone. I live in a small, someone called it a McMansion on the outskirts of town. Wow. Oh, okay. But for me it's small compared to our family home in Mipos.

But I live here and I send money back home to my family. That's good of you. And you're alone, do you have any friends? Did you say to your wife? Yeah, my wife's back in Mipos. Oh, wait, wait. Why don't you bring her over here? She has no interest.

Oh, she just doesn't want to. Well, she doesn't want to. She also has no interest in my stories. When I try to do a call, she keeps it very short. So I don't even get out. You know how long this complaint was in your app? Yeah. I don't even get, I say the,

ah, in America, and then she cuts off the call. You don't even get to the nightmare. I don't even get to the tin. Well, certainly not to the tin. She would say, oh, I'm so sick of hearing about your tin. Oh, look, you're in America. Here I am surrounded by tin. My child is made of tin.

Wait, what? It's an expression. It's not true. It is, okay. He is a boy. So you have a child. No, that's right. You have two children, you have twins.

And they're back there too, just to be clear. Yes, but they don't. So this seems crazy. You have two children. You have twins. And they're back there too. Just to be clear. So this seems crazy. You're not with your family at all. And for nine years it's been like this? This is a very common immigrant story. And you live in a McMansion that is small compared to your home in Meepo's. Yes, yes, yes.

My home here is a three bedroom, four bath, five garage. Wow. That's rare. You rarely get that into any calls, five garage. Wow. That's rare. You rarely get that into chemicals. Five garage. One is a mini golf cart garage. Oh, okay. Still counts though.

Still counts. Yeah. Fun. So why, I mean, why are you wasting your time here? Wait, are you in that- You're miserable. You're in that house that's intersected by five streets? Yes, yes, yes. So it's just one garage for each of the streets.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow, I've always been fascinated by that place. Well, yes. It's just one garage for each of the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I've always been fascinated by that place. Well, I'll stop by sometime. Oh, it's the one on spruce, evergreen, mulberry and palm. Yeah. Mm hmm. Uh, I was, I was, I invited this oil portrait to my home, by the way. You invited it.

So Doug, that was not you. Well, I was speaking to this where the sound was coming from. Right. Well, sometimes he hides behind there, but he's always listening. You should know that and he can always respond. I got soft.

I got used to living here. Now, if I go home to Meepo's, I think- It doesn't sound like it. It doesn't sound like you're softened at all. Oh no, this is so soft. You can't stand it here. This is so soft. You can't stand it here. This is so soft. You haven't met my brother and my uncle.

Okay. They are much harsher than me. Okay. Why do you think that my cousin, Balke, left? He, first of all, he just, he said these things to me with such disgust. Like I should know everything about his, every detail about his life.

Well, Bernd, I think, would understand as he has the blood connection. A little bit, I understand a little bit, yeah. We all have a cousin, Palki. Yeah, we do, right? I mean, I don't really know that that's true. I mean, not me, because I'm the only child. Neither do I.

You know, all I'm saying is if I send you a message. What'd you say? What'd you say? So that was instantly disproven. It's a thesis that goes, we all have a cousin Paukey. And it turns out nobody does. I didn't hear what he said. I do, I do, yes, of course. All I'm saying-

I'll just listen to it when it comes back around. I'll hear it back. I'll hear it back. Oh, you listen back to these. Oh, I always do. Oh. Yeah, because I really, I get self-conscious about my voice and about my talking and about everything.

Oh, the voice you're hearing now is not anything like the voice you will hear on the finished recording. Oh. I have them put a heavy filter on you? Oh, the voice you're hearing now is not anything like the voice you will hear on the finished recording. Oh. I have to put a heavy filter on it. Oh, okay. Okay. All I ask is.

Nobody, none of our listeners know what I really sound like. I know, it's a shame. It is. So it's not as bass heavy as I'm hearing right now. Yeah. Yeah. But I'll ask you to kindly take that out, Doug. Yeah, a lot of the smokiness is removed. Uh-huh. It just seems like no. But I'll ask you to kindly take that out, Doug.

A lot of the smokiness is removed. It just seems like, Did you see the movie Supergirl? Oh boy, here we go. No, I don't have to answer that. No, it contains a dynamite Brenda Vaccaro performance. And that's closer to what Jones voice actually says. No, I've only seen Superman three,

which had a scene in it which scared me. Oh, where a lady's face became wires. Oh, I don't remember that. That is true. This sounds like the last Starfighter moment for me. Sounds like the Poldra guys. Lady became wires. Lady became wires.

Lady became wires. I'm going to have to look it up. But also Richard Pryor was in it so it was funny. He stole one cent from everyone's paycheck and added them together to make a large sum. That was very clever. You know, I've never seen Superman 3. I thought one, but I can't remember it.

That was his plan? Yes, if you have seen the movie Office Space, it has the same plan. Oh, really? It does. Oh, okay. Do they acknowledge that in Office Space? They do.

Okay, good. Well, now all of a sudden Uncle Mary can be a part of our movie podcast.? They do. Okay, good. Well, now all of a sudden Uncle Mary can be a part of our movie podcast. This is great. That's true. We're not a movie podcast. I've heard so many mentions. I know. I know.

It's our fault. We can never help ourselves. We love the movies. We love the movies. I just don't understand why you want to stay here because, and I understand like maybe what the real problem is, is that you're getting ghosted by your wife. She's not even letting you get through your discussion about how you're feeling on the phone.

She just hangs up, it sounds like, or talks over you. So you feel maybe I'm disappointed, mad at my wife. It sure sounds like it. And then- It actually sounds like you should be, if you're not. Richie Richmond has not responded about this community center project. Maybe I'm seeing his actions in a light

that reminds me of my wife. I appreciate this. Usually our guests don't connect the dots like this. And I do appreciate you doing that. They never do. Is this a, do you fix your guests? We don't, I'm not a licensed therapist, but we do like to try to offer solutions,

help people amplify us a message, help them get to the bottom of a mystery. Exactly. I mean, that is so of course we have one path in front of us as the old folktale goes. Oh, it's just, it's just the voicemail. Yeah, that's a feature I've tried to shut off a million times and they're just for whatever reason, Burnt said you have to keep my voicemail machine here at your house. Yeah, because I can't shut that thing off. On call.

Pharmacist. So as... That's right. We have this Mepocene folk tale that says, there is one fork in front of you and that is to self-regard, to look at yourself, look at your actions, look at the actions of others, see how they rhyme with each other and are you reacting in the bad way? But the other side of that folktale is, maybe you just do what I want you to do.

And it sounds more floral in my home language. More floral? Yes, floral. So for me, when it comes to English, maybe you do what I want you to do. Oh. Yeah. So if I send you a missive, email, text, tweet, skeet.

Text, tweet, skeet. Please respond, it's not so hard. Okay. I mean, why this nightmare? Why this horribleness? Why this tin? Why this tin? Okay.

Now, let me, ideally, and I don't think we've addressed this. Why don't you do what I want you to do? I'm not sure. I'm trying to give you a better- I'm trying to give you a better- But it's more floral in here. It's more floral. Yeah, yeah, we got it, we got it.

Ideally, because I don't think we have nailed this down, what is the response time, what should the response time be from when you send the missive, skeet, whatever, to when you, when do you think the proper time is to respond? I think three business days. Three business days. Yes. It's twice more floral when he says it.

Three business days, which business days in Mepos are Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday. Oh, they're not in a row. How bizarre, that must be weird. And the next Friday. So when I say he didn't respond within four days, I mean your American two weeks, American fortnight as you like to say.

Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday, and the next Friday. Yes, and then it resets. Right. That seems like, that seems a tough way to do business for the days not to be in a row. One of them not even to always be in a row. It has served Meepos well for over 1500 years. What is Meepos' main business, main export, main...

What is Meepos known for? How do they make their money? Project management tools such as Confluence or Jira for no code development. Okay, that was it. Answer with a bullet. Wow. We have been doing that for 1500 years in some form. No code development. Okay, that was it. Answer with a bullet. And we have been doing that for 1,500 years, in some form.

No code development? Of course, not in a web browser, but the equivalent back when people were agricultural, we were project managed back in the day. Okay. Yeah, we have no native crops of our own. Okay. But we are very good at organization.

I don't know if you've heard of ancient Japanese art called kanban. Have not. We do that. What is that? That is you put a thing on a board and you move it to the right when you're done. I think I know what you're talking about.

I feel like I saw it in Shogun maybe. Yes, the entire second season of Shogun will revolve around project management. Okay. Really? And it's called a can ban. Can ban. So it's a Japanese... So it's just ways of checking off tasks. Yes. And we became... It's not a mepo... It's not a mepo-sian art, but we became the masters of it.

I see. Oh wow. Take that Japan. Much like... And then you found a way to monetize that? Yes, of course. Everyone needs a project manager. Kind of like the hot see. Oh wow. Take that Japan. Much like. And then you found a way to monetize that or? Yes, of course. Everyone needs a project manager. Kind of like the hot dog.

Sure. Yeah, it's every, it's like a, What type? Americans invented baseball, Japan became the masters of it. Ah, I see. Or hot dog. Or hot dog.

Or hot dog. The German delicacy mastered by, You know, I have to say the more, even though it sounds like your marriage is not going well, it sounds like you are so proud of me, Post. I just don't understand why you don't go back home. I really don't get why you're here. I really think it's time.

You gave up on searching for your husband. You gave it almost a decade. I will go back home. We still don't need you. He just raised the family anyway. So what are you doing? We still don't need you. What are you doing?

I don't know, what is this desire to push me out? Why not just return an email? I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. I will take you to heart. I will visit me, boss. You have not visited since you've left? I've been gone 15, nine years, 15 to visit, nine to live.

I've been back twice. 15 to visit, nine to live. I've been back two, two, twice. I'm so confused by that math 25 or six to four Yeah, well I was back for my twins 18th And then I was back for were they allowed to celebrate together? They celebrate you cannot sleep in the same room sleep in the same room, and then I was back for 2018 double Easter What's double Easter?

Four months after April Another Easter you do What's double Easter? Four months after April, we do another Easter. You do. Why is that? Just because what if he came back again? Right. What if he got the day wrong? Yeah. Yeah. Well, modern calendars, right? Sure. Yeah. OK. Well, I still think that you should go back home, Mary.

I really do. I think because you you clearly had a better life there and also you're kind of an unpleasant person. Here's the main reason. You don't need to jive well with great things. All right. Bert sometimes is a little bit straight forward. Brust. Brust, that's right.

Blunt. I would just say I don't think that you're ever going to be happy here. That's what I'm trying to say. Oh, yes. Well, I mean... You can't control what happens here, you know, in this town. You can't manage the project of the people of Dignity Falls.

Now here's an issue. I just think you won't be happy here. Then what do I do with my house? Oh, I'll sell it for you. Really? Absolutely. And what do I do with all my pills? Oh, you have a lot of pills?

Will you sell all my pills for me? Oh, I didn't realize you had a lot of pills. I mean, that didn't come up. It did not come up. What do you want all these pills for me? Oh, I didn't realize you had a lot of pills. I mean, that didn't come up. It did not come up. What do you want all these pills for? I mean, what do you think my second and third bedrooms and fourth bathrooms and fifth garages? They're just filled with pills.

Yes. Wait, now I recognize you. I mean, recently I won an award at the pharmacy. Oh, yes. I had a, it was in the back of my brain, like I know I've seen this person before. And you are the, the two time winner of millions pill.

I asked about that too at the beginning. It is funny. It's very fun. That's crazy. And you come out and sing. You sing one of the, I don't, sure. You don't know. I'm a post-year in folk song. Oh, is it? Oh, was that, what do we copy them for Peter and the wolf? Did Tchaikovsky copy him? This is the Mepocian pill. I get myself the millionth pill. I mean, of course you have a connection.

Of course I do have a connection. Yes. So it's in my blood. Okay. Well, Uncle Mary. Best of luck to you. Best of luck to you. Well, I will leave my house in pills. I think that sounds like a plan. Yeah, absolutely. We'll take care of it for you. Yeah, great. Yeah. Go home. Go home. Be with your family. Okay. Did you have, send me the money. Okay. We'll figure it out in the cash app to

to go home or? Well, I mean, no, once you sell the house and the pills. That's gonna be all taken care of. You buy and sell pills, right? Well, I mean, I don't really do either of those things. I wouldn't categorize your job that way. Yeah. Yeah.

By the way, your cousin's at the tavern, like every Wednesday. Oh my God, what Doug? Yeah. Balkey? How do you know that? Cause he's talks, he just talks about me posts and rants about America. Oh my gosh.

Oh, he also rants about America. He doesn't like it here. That's a hell of a thing to just throw out here at the end when he's been looking for him for so long. Do me a favor. Maybe you sell my house. Maybe you sell my pills and don't let him know that I was here.

Wow. Okay. I hope he's not a listener. Might be. Okay. You know that for a fact. You brought up the podcast. Well, I mean, it seems like you want to go, I should say the, where we say traditionally when we leave each other, Martini and Rossi, Asti Spumanti.

When you've got good tasteits, let it show. Wonderful. Well, thank you Uncle Mary. Here's your sneeze. Oh, thank you. And I do have to practice. Yes, you do have to. So we'll do that during the break.

More with the neighbor listen, when the neighbor listen returns. Hey y'all, this is Deborah Jo. Hey y'all, this is Debra Jo. I got an animal cage, 50 bucks. Originally used to display cats. That's right. I don't want to answer any follow up questions about what that means, display cats. All you need to know is they were sick of being displayed, those cats.

They organized a coup and they're gone now. So come get these animal cage. Wow. Well, that was Mary. and they organized a coup and they're gone now, so come get these animal cage. Wow, well that was Mary. That was Mary, everybody. I hope it's okay that I said, you seem like an unpleasant person, because he really did. I mean, yeah, I mean, sometimes you really are a little blunt,

but, and I sometimes worry about our guests, because, you know, we don't want anyone to exit here feeling bad about themselves. It wouldn't be okay if he did. I mean, all he did was, he complained nonstop. Yeah, I think he's just in a lot of pain. I actually do, I think he's homesick.

That's very generous. Okay, fine, okay, maybe it is. They call him the meepos marauder. I'm sorry, what? Why did that happen? I'm working on this, you know, news reporting. Oh, no, I completely forgot. I get it. I get it. Yeah. You're doing that thing. Yeah. Good job. I know you like that. I love it. When a newscaster does that, they call him the mayor of Southwest.

This area man greets passengers as they come off Southwest airline planes. That's too good, Berndt, that's really good. That's great. Well, you know, that's something I've always liked to newscasters when I was a kid. They seem very authoritative. Oh yeah.

Yeah. Especially like the local people. Oh, you know who we used to love, and I think he just passed away, was Tim Tryman. And he was on the local news for dozens of years. And he became a very comforting figure. And even in his old age,

when he would start telling people that the retribution was at hand, and things like that. And his eyes got so bloodshot. They got so bloodshot. Red rimmed eyes. He started doing the news in his pajamas. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not like a cool Howard Beal way. No. Anyway, he died recently. A piano fell on him. All right, we have time for one. That's cruel. We have time for- You know what, Doug? It was so cruel.

It was cruel. Yeah, it was on a boat. And the seas were rough. And this piano that was in one of the lounges, it slid. Just in the right way. Just in the right way. Just in the impossibly impossible way. Tipped over, fell off a deck.

And then as the ship was writing itself, he was in the wrong place. He was just taking a stroll. I didn't think that the memoriam was very appropriate with the guy was playing the piano suspended. That was unfair. That was unfair. That was unfair. And also I'm surprised they spent so much money

on the memoriam for him like that. Just one guy. Yeah, yeah. A lot of people died that week. It looked like a closing ceremony of the Olympics or something. Exactly. Now you have one last post.

Yeah, we got one last post. This is from Morris and this is in the recommendations. And this is Morris is writing about someone who cleaned his pool. And I'm gonna read this the way that it sort of is formatted. Okay. Okay, because it sounds sort of like a poem. Mm-hmm.

It presents itself as sort of like a poem. Milton cleaned my pool. He cleaned the surface, tiles, and filters. He checked the water quality. He balanced the chemicals. The pool looked better after. I appreciate his work. I would recommend his services. Message me for his number. And it's accompanied by a couple pictures

of really nice looking pools. Do you know, I heard like Chopin playing in the background while you read that, do you know what I mean? I do. Just something so elegant. It was like four haikus put together. And all of those lines were separate, right? They were all separate lines, yes.

They were all new thoughts. Boy, that's amazing. Beautiful. It really is beautiful. And imagine being Milton. Right. I really hope that gets to Milton. I hope Milton sees this. I'm not sure respect has ever been paid so much to a Pullman before. I know. No, I don't think so. He's not that good either. Oh, you know Milton? Oh yeah. Why do you say he's not that good, Doug? He's not that good either. Oh, you know Milton?

Oh yeah. Why do you say he's not that good Doug? I mean, he uses that thing and you know, gets some of the leaves out. The skimmer? He uses that thing. The skimmer. Okay.

You know, and then he- The net with the long handle. And then he just dumps the leaves right by the pool. And doesn't clean them up. Leaves them there? No, he just says, I got them out of your pool. I'm not. I'm not land man.

I'm not, I'm not land man. I can't begin to follow that. I mean, he's like, it's before the land man, the show, this says like, I'm a pool man, not a land man. Okay. I'm not cleaning your land. Oh, because now the leaves are on land. Yeah. I see.

They're no longer as touristy. You would have thought he would have said, I'm not a gardener, but you know. Yes, it now the leaves are on land. Yeah. I see. They're no longer as jurisdiction. You would have thought he would have said, I'm not a gardener, but you know. Yes, instead, I'm a land man. He's trying to make sure you cover everything on land. All right. Yeah. I mean, the pools in this,

the pool in this picture looks fabulous. Are you sure it's not just you? Maybe Milton has an issue with you? That's what I was going to say, because whenever Milton would come over to do our pool, he would just stand right there, like right behind him, right on the shelf. Oh, that.

He'd be like, Mr. Leaf. I'd talk his ear off, I think. Mr. Leaf, you know, it was just, it was very antagonizing, and I don't think he appreciated it. People don't like that. When they have a job that's a specific job like that, they don't like it.

I really don't mean it negatively. I just tend to chatter too much with them. They got my hand on my head. But the chatter is sort of saying things like, you missed a leaf. Yeah. Yeah. Not something you necessarily say in other situations.

Yeah. I see a bogey over there. You know, stuff like that. Bogey of your sex. Bogey three o'clock, yeah. Here we go. Okay. I thought they would like it.

I thought Milton would like it. I don't think Milton liked it. Didn't like it at all. Yeah. Thank you so much. We will be back next week with a new episode. If you'd like to hear ad free versions of the episodes and have access to our bonus content, go to CBBworld.com

and sign up for the Maximist here. And the bonus content is, it's us sometimes talking about Dignity Falls traditions, other things in Dignity Falls we haven't explored. Sometimes it's us watching a movie together, which is a lot of fun. Sometimes it's other people's podcasts. Other people in Dignity Falls who have podcasts and an episode of theirs gets run in our feed. I still don't understand how that happens.

They somehow pirate our podcasts, our RSS feed and get them in there. But you can hear it all. CBBWorld.com, the Maximus tier. We'll be back with another guest next week and until then, goodbye. And bye. All of the posts used in this episode were real. Only some geographical specifics have been changed.

The Neighborhood Listen is hosted and produced by me, Paul F. Tompkins. And me, Nicole Parker. And me, Brett Morris. This episode's guest was played by Chris Grace. The Neighborhood Listen is a production of Comedy Bang Bang World. Go to CBBWorld.com to unlock the entire history of the show, ad-free, as well as brand new full-length bonus room episodes,

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