The Netmums Podcast - S1 Ep32: Aston Merrygold on coping when racism’s directed at your kids

Episode Date: May 4, 2021

Listen as Annie and Wendy get up close and personal with Aston Merrygold from JLS. From racist trolling of his kids to what it’s like having a talented child, Aston tells it like it is.

You're listening to Sweat, Snot and Tears brought to you by Netmums. I'm Annie O'Leary. And I'm Wendy Gollage. And together we talk about all of this week's sweaty, snotty and tearful parenting moments. With guests who are far more interesting than we are. Sweaters, snotterers and teary types, how are you today? We are stressed with workloads, aren't we, Wen? So I'd say we're sweaty, teary.

And I know this isn't a body fluid, but probably sweary well I'm definitely sweary I'm really sweary there's quite a lot going on and we're recording this in the run-up to the Easter bank holiday weekend which when you run a website means there's lots of stuff to do so um both of us were a bit stressed and counting down to gin o'clock excellent there are how many hours to go just under four till gin o'clock. Excellent. There are how many hours to go? Just under four till gin o'clock, I would say. Oh, you've brought it forward by two hours. I like this. Good. Hey, hey, if you can't do it on a sweaty, snotty, teary, sweary day,

when can you? Right, so let's find out which of the three bodily fluids our guest is swimming in today. Let's hope he's a little more relaxed than us. Keep it clean, Wend, keep it clean. So, X Factor got to dance strictly, almost never start, and the masked singer. JLS band member and dad to Grayson and Macaulay, probably his most important roles. Welcome, Aston Marigold.

Hey, how you doing, guys? Well, we are what we are. So the first question we ask all of our guests, which you might have got an idea of from our little moan just now, is any sweat, snot or tears in your house this morning? Tears, actually, this morning. It's quite an emotional... Both. Not yours?

Both of them. Both the boys. No, not mine just yet. No, no, no, no. I don't... Oh, there's one. Yeah, there's one. Daddy!

Daddy! And shouty, apparently, no, no, no. I don't, I don't, I don't. Oh, there's one. Yeah, there's one. Daddy, daddy. And shouty apparently as well. So that's, yeah. So we've got tears and shouting. So how old are they now? Grayson is three and Macaulay is, what's the date today? Oh, he's nearly 10 months, 10 months in four days. Oh, you're in the cold face.

You're right up in the middle of it. Yeah, I'm fully right in the face. Does anybody in your house sleep? I probably get the most sleep, to be honest. So I can't really complain about... Oh, hi. Hello, little person. We're just going to get some treats

for the shop, Daddy. He's getting some treats from the shop. Oh, can you get some treats for us? Can you get some treats for everybody? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, thank you. some treats for us? Can you get some treats for everybody? Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. You're a very kind boy.

Good job. And he's off. And he's off. Yeah, he can literally reach the door now as well. So you actually have to watch the front door because he's ran out the front door. Oh, yeah. I remember that stage. Yeah.

Our youngest, Macaulay, is definitely a mummy's boy. Let's put it that way. We'll get up in the middle of the night. If he does wake up and it will take me double the amount of time that it takes Sarah to settle Macaulay. And there's tears now as well. So I want to ask you, how was your lockdown? We loved watching you let loose on TikTok

and the soft play party at your house for Grayson was incredible. Did you quite like all the hunkering down or was all of that sort of a desperate attempt to keep your mind off things and keep busy? At first, TikTok was definitely the whole, let's distract ourselves with something and try and entertain people, entertain ourselves and just be positive during this crazy time. And then it actually just turned into like a daily kind of dose of fun for all of us. I mean, the kids would get involved and, you know,

we would start trying to do just really random stuff. Like, you know, the soft play thing. That is TikTok. Anything we could do. This is it. And we were like, let's just do it. Like, it's the one platform. You don't have to actually take yourself very seriously on Instagram, Twitter. I know it's about oh you have to have the right opinions for twitter it'll

be really funny or instagram you have to make sure this picture looks good and it's edited i'm just like oh like you know what it's like when you've got kids you kind of go i don't look anything like this picture today i'm going to post it but i just don't look anything close to this yeah so that whole facade of fresh haircut glowy skin like no not at all like tired eyes washed out all sorts but it's you know so that that kind of um escape to tiktok for us was a big thing in this house and we uh i say we gained a child in the middle of lockdown so it was uh you know your world turns upside down when you've got one child anyway so to add another one into the mix it was a bit like right we need to keep you happy but we also need to now do everything we did the first time around when we're absolutely

ko knackered so how do we do this like we did then? And it's just like, you know, there's never a day in parenting when I say it is, you know, you just go, oh, it's by the book. Never, never by the book. Everything's different. Everyone's experience is different. Even if it's relatively the same. No, I'm not having it. It's still different. Yeah. Just totally across the board. So we're just like at times during lockdown, just been absolute zombies, which being stuck in your house isn't the worst thing when it comes to that. Obviously what's going on outside is terrible,

but being stuck in the house and actually having, you know, to concentrate and the kids going, right, I can do this. I've got, you know, it's been a really hard day. They're crying all day. I can last until seven o'clock. Like I've got this. I can entertain.

I can do whatever. I can pass out. It's fine. I I've got this. I can entertain. I can do whatever. I can pass out. It's fine. I always remember just getting to see BB's bedtime. That was the thing. If you got to the bedtime hour, you'd made it. And you could put them in front of the bedtime hour and you knew you were home and dry at that point.

See, do you know what? That is, we've totally just, I don't know what, we've just missed that. And one of my best friends, JB, is on CBeebies as well. And he does all like the story time stuff and we're like why do we not utilise that more

but I will say we've actually got and this is from his aunt Grayson McCauley's aunt it's called a Tony box I'm not sure if you've ever seen this box right or has it got like

a little thing on the top of it it's little figurines that go on top nice precise description there Wendy little thing on top, yeah. He's got loads of characters,

whether it be, you know, Woody from Toy Story or Nemo from Finding Nemo, and it just reels off the story. So that's bedtime. So it's now got to the point of he loves to read throughout the day anyway, and we're a bit like, really, we're going to have to now read you another book to bed?

It doesn't feel like bedtime. So whereas this is like, you know, there's no screen and it's just a bit like you can see him staring up at the ceiling and imagination's just running wild that's this has just been oh honestly i think i need one for me yeah trust me nice it's really good and you had to move your wedding yeah the wedding was uh well i said we actually never officially booked a date we had always had an idea and we was always like, right, it's going to be this time. We're going to do this and do that. And we were always those people.

I say we are always those people to basically plan up to do something, but then still book it last minute if that makes any sense to anyone. I'm the same. Like I do, I plan what I'm going to buy for them for their birthdays and Christmas. And then on Christmas Eve, I'm like, I haven't bought half of it thank you okay good i'm just so glad you said that because we you know when you kind of sit there we go are we the only ones do that like we plan it yeah this person gonna get this or we're gonna do this or we're gonna go here and it's all planned which is just but not actioned planned but not actioned i think

it's having kids so do you know when it's gonna be have you planned but not actioned i think it's having kids so do you know when it's going to be have you planned but not actioned the next wedding um no we've got a date now which is good so we have actually got the date um so now we're kind of the ideas that we had the ideas that basically we had were summer so now it's a winter wedding i was a winter wedding how was that for you it was lovely though i kept wishing it would snow so it'd be like proper fairy tale winter and it didn't of course it didn't um but it was absolutely lovely it was really lovely see i'm not for snow to be honest okay well then that's good don't plan for it because it won't happen anyway is it you say that now watch it's gonna happen now isn't it it's

gonna snow um but yeah no it's it's listen we're right in the thick of of wedding plans so it's gonna happen now isn't it it's gonna snow um but yeah no it's it's listen we're right in the thick of of wedding plans so it's kind of like guest list um date locked and it's just kind of planning everything else and then you know deciding on the save the date invitation and this invitation it's a bit like i'd send a text out or an email to be honest but sarah's obviously very um very different to i am in that department she's like no we need to get the right one so I'm like okay yeah now I'm gonna get a bit more serious for a second because this is something that you spoke about recently I know your social media presence hasn't all been exactly fun and games you shared that Grayson has been the victim of some racist comments. Yes. How on earth do you handle that?

Has it changed you wanting to be so visible? Or, like, that's horrific. Has it changed me? No, it hasn't changed me or... Oh, hi. The gate's not open. The gate's not open. Okay, that's good.

High five. Good boy. Right, Daddy will see you soon. We're trying to get in the car and open the gate. You're trying to open the gate. Okay, wait for Mummy. Then Mummy will open the gate for you, okay? Okay, great.

Okay, great. Okay, great. He's got the cutest voice ever. Honestly, it's like, it's just, yeah, I'm like, ah, okay. High octane. High octane. Exactly, very. The comments that were received online,

yeah, it definitely didn't make us feel like you wanted to hide away or restrict anything of what we post and that kind of stuff. To be honest, it made me more, I don't know if it's possible, but it made me more protective, obviously, because it's possible but made me more protective obviously because it's a bit like i was always ready for that to happen but never really because that was going to be my next question is it would never have occurred to me in eight gazillion trillion years that that would be a thing that's awful that you were even prepared for it yeah i mean the only reason i say that i would i would be prepared for it is because of you know

me going through racism through childhood um adulthood daily basis you see stuff it's just a bit like it's there clean as day and it's a bit like you know i've gained my knowledge i've gained my experience and i know how to kind of handle that and how i want to handle that you know some people might see it and be like you just need to ignore it and did it i'm not that person i'm hitting it head on and being like, I'm calling everyone out on it. So for the fact of my two boys, to some people may look fully white and their heritage. To others, they'll be like, you're a bit darker.

You look like you've got some kind of mix within your ethnicity. And it's getting them ready for those questions firstly and then it's getting to the point of some people just aren't going to like you because when they look at you that's that's just that's just is what it is you know that's that's that's the you know that's the type of people that we live among um i'm afraid and it's like getting them kind of you know know, obviously not at this age because you can explain the same thing over and over again at this age, as we know, with anything. And it just doesn't register as quick as other things will. That's fine. But me being

prepared before was, I don't know, from six, seven, eight, maybe when the questions really come and it's, you know, they're out of nursery and they're kind of into, you know, from six, seven, eight, maybe when the questions really come and it's, you know, they're out of nursery and they're kind of into, you know, year ones, twos, threes, that kind of, I don't want to call it a funny age group, but it's that really inquisitive, really like, all of them. And it's a bit like, you know, nieces, nephews have got at that age and they're very much the point point of they'll ask you a question and then they're really listening for the answer it's not like daddy why is this taste of orange you'd be like oh it just tastes of orange look we put this in it you know you can get away with that at a certain age it's fine when they're really looking to listen for the answer it's a bit like right that's when I need to be ready you know but obviously getting those kind of comments at

this age it was a bit like I'm never gonna. Firstly, it's obviously not his Instagram. The pictures are wrong. This is an Instagram that we run. And especially in lockdown, we're like, we want to show his progress. Me and Sarah will go on record and say, we're definitely not the sharpest tools in the shed. But for some reason, this three-year-old is ridiculous. And he reads at this age. And we're like, we don't know how, but we nurture that.

And we, you know, numbers, letters, all of it. He just loves it. So he's very much into dance, sport, everything we love, but he's grasped onto this knowledge. And he just seems like a really smart child. So we're like, right, we'll nurture that the best we can. We want to share. Like if he's sitting down and reading us a book and it's a bit everyone's like oh my gosh that's amazing our families don't get to see that we're in lockdown our friends don't get to see that we're in lockdown

so that was the point in us posting a bit more stuff so when stuff like that is posted like you know harmful comments that say are posted under pictures and stuff like that i know that's not sent for grayson that's sent for me yeah do you mean because it's a bit like only an absolute moron would think that a three-year-old is reading instagram scrolling through instagram and going i'm gonna post this picture no that you like it says in the account you know managed by me sarah so that's aimed for me I don't mind if you say and you can say whatever you like to me I've dealt with that and I'm like yeah cool whatever mate but my kids are you hopeful that by the time he's older that the landscape will have changed enough that he maybe won't have to deal with it in the way you did as a six seven eight year old who's grown a

thick skin because he had to yeah listen i don't i don't think it'll be to the extent because obviously we're still going to be to the to the naked eye we're going to be different shades do you mean he's not going to get the obvious you know racial attack shall i say but at the same time i'd always want him to be ready for that and be knowledgeable to be like well hold on hold on. If you say this, then I've been taught that this, you know, I need him. I need him to be,

you know, have his ammunition there ready. It just breaks my heart that anyone has to have any ammunition. Do you know what I mean? Oh, listen, of course, listen,

I'm, you, you, you, you would hope, you know, that a magic wand just be kind of spread across everyone and it would just disappear.

Should I mean, or anything like it would just disappear should i mean or anything like that would just disappear but the truth of the matter is it it's not gonna by the time he's my age it's probably still not gonna be do you know i mean because that's just the world that we live in but at the same time we can hope and i'm not gonna you know ever be negative about the subjects i'm always gonna be positive and be like listen as long as we're all talking about it that's the first step it's when it gets swept under the carpet and no one's kind of like yeah that's when it becomes really scary it's an issue yeah the thing you clearly sound like you think your role as a parent is to help prepare your kids to be resilient and all of that stuff

did your parents do the same with you yes but with an element of freedom if that makes sense it was a bit like you know this my mum would never turn around and be like yeah I always wanted him to be in the entertainment industry for instance of course not it's probably the worst industry to kind of you know try and fling yourself into because there's no security around it at all you're just out there you're out there and then what's even worse is when we see it more so now because documentaries are just here there and everywhere when you you know you see documentaries of young stars and whatever else especially going into the industry you know i came in at 15 like if i was 15 now trying to go into the industry my mom would

probably have a very different approach because of all the stuff that's out there. And that's been told by stars of the past. And it's a bit like, this is what they had to go through. This is, you know, their story and blah,

blah, blah. And it's now brought to light. It's a bit like, it was never a question really before. My mum was just like, do you want to do this? Okay.

Well, you have to make sure that you're just, you know, the rules, just be kind to everybody be that it was it was that you know just install what she thought was right let me make my choices some choices obviously you know were wrong you go home shed a tear and she's like right dust off let's go again like whatever you want to do she was there to kind of pick up and support you know i mean all of my family my mom dad everyone so it's that upbringing that makes me go listen with a certain amount of freedom of course like i'm not going to say that

you know for instance people that walk past the gate or whatever grayson don't talk to them grayson's the first person to be like hi hi hi everyone and he wants to be that i never want to take that away from him to be the person that can walk into a room and say hi to everybody. To him and to all children, it's a bit like you're the same as I am. That is what it is. Obviously, we all do lose that across the way, but the longer I can keep that installed in him, I feel the better. You've spoken out recently about really understanding the pressures

that Britney Spears was under as a young star and I know that's come to light a lot because of the big documentary about her and her dad tell us about that um I think I mean listen that's on a scale of absolute worldwide can't walk anywhere superstardom you know for me and the boys it was like i was so lucky at 18 19 to have older brothers right next to me you know and have people that were older and and even more so you look at someone like marvin that had basically been through the experience before because he was in a band before us yeah and he and he experienced that so he knew certain things that we didn't know pass that knowledge on and then we were all kind of you know in the light with it so any young person being thrust into the industry is always you know especially in that way like

the x-factor or any show that flings you straight into the public eye there's always going to be from a business side there's always going to be a certain number of people behind the scenes going right we need to hit x targets and do this and make money it's a business at the end of the day that's fine we want to just get on stage and sing and make music and have fun tour have a laugh and but behind the scenes there are targets to hit there's a business to run you know it's a well-oiled machine that you know it is what it is not getting blinded by all the great stuff in front of you was a massive learn for me learning cup just because the you know the rest of the boys were old and

they were like yeah we want to see the business we want to we want to check these books we want to do this because there have been so many stories i you know like your britneys and whatever else that i'm sure there were probably times when people are too scared to ask for their own touring records you know tour books what are we spending what's that being spent on what's being spent here you know but as a 15 year old it's hard to be like you say it's hard to be savvy to that stuff yeah most 15 year olds having to be a business person isn't it that's but that's it and it's a bit like you know you get so well what is it your a levels is that is that probably when you get taught to get to kind of choose business for for instance, for like, you know, for the first time. At 15, she wouldn't have even sat her, you know, GCSEs. That's like a whole different ball game

to kind of do business at that age. So it's unique, you know, as I said, I was so lucky to have people around me that were so savvy that were sitting in the exact same chair as me. It wasn't like I had someone looking after me that was on the payroll. No like I had someone looking after me that was on the payroll and I had someone looking after me that was that owned the business with me do you know what I mean so I was very lucky in that sense and that's why it is you know it's so difficult in this industry because

it's like I work 24 hours a day seven days a week but people that work for you they'll still be clocking off because they work for you whereas it's a bit like oh but the entertainment industry is my life that's what i have to keep on doing every day all day so yeah it's it's a hard one i think you know especially because times are changing you definitely can't get away with a lot more than people did back in the day especially for social media um everything's brought to light now and yeah I mean that's I suppose that's sometimes the the good things of you know the good side of social media so do you think that's why you guys have become so dedicated

to giving back I know there's a JLS foundation but you're also known for being a really kind mentor to younger stars who happen to cross your path who are up and coming has is that driven by that kind of luck that you had and knowing that it's a tough industry um in one part 100 100 that's like you know anybody that took the time or still does take the time. I'm always learning anyway. I can't sit here and go, yeah, I know everything. Not at all. To anybody that does take the time to just lend or give out some wisdom, some of their time, it's like, you have to cherish that.

Because they don't have to do that. You know? And that's, I think that's with any sector or genre of work i don't think that's just the entertainment industry and not even work like it's a bit like parenting or life need all your mates who've been through it to give you little tips and then you pass them on to the next person don't you 100 and they but that's it they they they evolve and they you'll use 50 of what this person said and it's a bit bit like, oh, you know, whenever you step into the studio, I do this and I do this and da da da da. And you kind of go, okay. But then you find your own way of doing it. I'm not going to do exactly the same as this person because it's times are different now. It's a bit like we walk into the studio and it's a bit like we have to hold the

phone here and be like, Hey, look, we're going in here now. And da da da da da. Whereas before it's like people would have to wait until there was a song out. Then you would give them some behind the scenes footage. Whereas the behind the scenes footage now is like, that's, you need the behind the scenes footage to then basically get to the forefront of music, a film, a TV series, whatever it is, you need that buildup. So any, any kind of wisdom or knowledge that I've gathered over the years, I'm like, yeah, listen, it's like, whoever wants it, take it, like, feel free to ask. Like it's not, it's not a competition for one. But I think it's quite rare though. I think when your name comes up, a lot of people say he's such a nice guy. Like he's always helping other people out. And JLS actually, as a, as a group are known for being really kind in that way i think you should pat yourselves on

the back because a lot of people don't behave like that in any industry no thank you no i mean this is i mean to us it's very normal i just feel like why would you why would you hold hold back help do you mean even if they don't need the help it might help down the line yeah exactly it's like just you know i was listening to something that nile horne did actually um and he was saying because obviously he was thrown headlong into yeah teenage super duper stardom as well and he was saying that kind of like those bits of of the behind the scenes bits that you learn it's not fair to keep them to yourself because the young kids coming up have got it much harder he said they've got it much harder than you had it

as a 15 year old because of social media in a way that you and that you're always on you're never off never you can't you can Never. You can't be off. I think even as people now, you feel like you can't be off. Yeah. Wade and I know that feeling, don't we, Wade? Just a bit. It's bloody exhausting. It is, right?

This is the bit I don't get. How do you juggle all of that, that never offness and raise kids? That's like, because that's never off either. So this is interesting right so the other day i had uh it's just like a meeting with my team and stuff like that and you know you were talking about forward thinking and what's next and what we're doing here and blah blah and hitting all these targets and it's like right okay let's look at like you know now it's a thing it's but let's look at social media let's go following let's a thing. It's about let's look at social media. Let's go following. Let's look at this.

Let's look at where your numbers are, your engagement to this, what people like when you're doing this. And I'm just like, yeah, but if you look at X, Y, and Z over there, it's like they're going to have 2 million, 3 million, 5 million, 10 million followers. They don't have children. Yeah. Right. They don't.

They have all the time. If I had, I promise you promise you now right if i didn't have two children and i had all the time all the time in the world i'm telling you now that i would be doing the most ridiculous stuff in this like i would i can't even begin to think like where the imagination would take me because it already goes there with the kids. And I'm like, we could do this and da, da, da, da. Because it's headspace. It's not just time, is it?

Kids take up your thinking time as well as your doing time. Yeah, you just don't have headspace, body space, house space to do any of that stuff. Like at all. Honestly, I think my, a i had a nice little gym just here and it's now that's now gone from i've gone to hell been moved out i was like i'm just gonna use this space outside in the garden for my gym stuff you've been relegated to the garden but not not wait for this one not only have i been relegated to the garden i've now been told

well you're the gym has to now you have to move the gym all the gym stuff that i move from in there to out there now you have to go to the other side of the garden where no one can see you basically because this is all getting the work done so the kids can have the swings here and i'm going i've been how do you get relegated like further down the garden? Not even. You're not even in the house anymore. Yeah, I was like, I get like, you know, I put it outside and I was like, yeah, cool.

I'll take that one on the chin. You can have the playroom. That is what it is. But then to be moved further, like there's no sun that can hit that part of the garden now it's like you're in the dark literally yeah like the trees are all over this covering so it's all going to get covered and i'm like this is you need to do an extension it's the only way build yourself a gym no but i but they have that as well i reckon if i do that i guarantee that turns into a shed

that would just turn into a okay let's put this slide in here and let's put the sandpit I'm like just you wait till you get skateboards and surfboards and all the other stuff that comes when they're bigger boards canoes seriously now one of the questions I was going to ask is what would you do if the kids wanted to go into showbiz would it be something that you supported or would you be like oh guys really wouldn't you like to be a librarian um I mean so I have to look at this one of two ways for one it's like if we're gonna do it we're gonna do it yeah and that's the only like that's that's that you know if you want it, yep, we'll go for it all the way. You can't not, not you have to cut everything off, but you kind of have to, there's not, you can't really have any distractions.

Yeah, there's no half measures. Yeah. And it's like, there comes, you know, if he tells me at six, seven, he's like, daddy, I want to do what you do and I want to do this. I'm like, when you're older, we'll have this conversation when you're a bit older. It's hard because he sings now, right? And I'm going, oh, he's going to sing. Because that was going to be my next question is, can he sing? Yeah, that was next.

Are they any good? Oh, man. He's, yeah. And it's that thing of going, he's, I mean, he started, Sarah will laugh at me now, but she, um, we basically put a Jackson 5 song on that I used to sing when I was really, I used to love it. And he started singing and I got really kind of like choked up and I got really emotional. I was like, oh, okay. Oh, wow. Okay.

Like he's really good. He's really good. And he's three. so he's not really paying any attention to it he's just singing along yeah but it's the next few years you kind of go if he starts turning out like you know like the young young young michael jackson did and stuff like that i'm kind of going oh my god like this whole plan of me going no you can't do this until we get to a certain age i'm going to sit down have a conversation and we're going to be like no we're going to sacrifice x y and z and do it because he just could be incredible and i'm like is there a bit of you that's like shit i really don't want him

to be any good a little bit you're not alone actually i've got a few friends i've got a friend whose son is incredible at football and even at the age of like four people were coming up to him saying you do know he's talented right and I remember her crying saying I don't want that for my boy I just want him to be normal and I was like what and then another friend her and her husband used to be really like good athletes like her husband narrowly missed out on the Olympic team for running she was a gymnast and she won't let them go to athletics club or gymnastics club because she said this is interesting it's another way of looking at it she said we narrowly missed it and it broke our hearts and she said i'd never want them to experience that failure either but then you haven't let them try i know and that's it we've stayed up late at night being this friend

saying but come on if they've got something you've got to push them you've got to give them every chance and if they don't fail it that, they'll fail at something else. I know, I know. You've got to fail at something. I know. It's really complicated stuff, isn't it? If you don't fail at something, you end up being a complete shithead. That's why we're so nice, Wendy, because we've failed at so many things.

Oh, dear. Don't joke. I mean. No, I mean. that's it it's so difficult because in my head i'm going well the only way you do fail is if you don't try it yeah because that's the only way you definitely won't do it you won't do it if you don't try that's a fact right so it's yeah it's just. That's a fact, right? So it's, yeah, it's just one of them things I go, right, we would really,

really love it if he, you know, he could dance and he could sing and it would just be, you know, it's within the household. That's just what it is. It's like, you know,

we do it every day. So it's, it's going to happen. It's happening now, but for him to try and make a career out of it, it's that he might not want it. Yeah. He might just love doing it in the kitchen and nothing else this is it and i'm like you're a bit too clever for that as well to be honest that's interesting i always got that thing at school where they got you know

the teacher would go there's definitely potential there for him to be a lot better at this you know but he doesn't apply himself and i'm like i apply myself i'm just thick as like you know anything so no but my thing i was like anything theory work was i was like that's not me like i can't do that like i'm lucky where okay i could read a script for instance and then i can memorize the script straight away i'm i can put that to good use because then i can act and do that and i can sing and i can remember all my words and i can dance over here but if you ask me to do i don't know an essay on this and then i'm like lost me no not at all that's okay not everyone can be good at everything no some of us trust me you haven't seen me dance i am not good at dancing you say that after. After a gin, I'm sure you'll find you'll be like, yeah, we're good to go.

Oh, you should see her. You should see her, Aston, after a gin. They made me dance at my hen do. It's a sight to behold. Anyway, moving swiftly on. JLS. JLS are back, back, back. Yep.

Tell us, how the hell did that happen? And what are you doing? To be honest, just over a drink. We went, yeah, go on then. So that's what happens to you when you drink be honest just over a drink we went yeah go on then so that's what happens to you when you drink gin aston yeah basically that's literally it no it's it's it just sounds weird doesn't it but we you know we speak all the time every day we've got there's about the whole it annoys me but we've got about 20 groups with us all in jl it's just us for jls with you know one of our

managers jls with the wives jls with it's like oh my god like why do we have friends that makes me feel happy yeah no listen that's that you know like i said that's my brothers that's that's you know we're his closest family so for this to ever happen it was never going to be right we all need to sit down and do it no get over the hatred this is it and it's a bit like we don't actually understand how any group ever gets to the point of if you do if you do get success gets to that point but then just kind of goes their separate ways and that's it like i'm never speaking to again. I'm like, you will have so many scenarios where you will be the only, you know,

three, four, five, six people in the room knowing exactly what that person opposite you is going through. I think it's been like being a sibling, being a band member, because there are experiences that only you can understand. Yeah, and you'll feel the same.

It's not like you kind of go, oh, it's happening to you. No, it's happening to all of us. That is what it is. You know what I mean? If something happens, it's a bit like, ah, you know, the record didn't do this or this hasn't done this. However you feel, that's how everyone feels.

And you're the only one that knows how that person's feeling at that time. Do you know what I mean? It doesn't matter about the manager or whatever. No, you're in the same position as this person, this person, this person, this person. That's, you know, that is what it is. So for us, it was never going to be a case of let's have a business chat and do this. It was always like, let's have a drink. But have you got further than the drink and yeah, let's do it?

Or is that as far as you've got so far? No, no. Like, listen, the tour is there. It's set. We're good to go. We'll be there. Won't we good to go. We'll be there. Won't we, Wend? We'll be there.

Well, if tours are allowed, could we please have some live music allowed, first of all? Well, yeah, I know. Trust me. It's coming. It's coming. There's light at the end of the tunnel. We know there is.

Are you looking forward to going back? Are you really, is it something you can't wait to do? Yeah, definitely. Definitely. I think it's that thing of going the first time around it was a whole new experience we were like whoa shiny lights this is great and we're learning oh wow like this is i've got an account and let me talk to an account about these and i don't understand what you're talking about but this is cool. Like, you know, I'm an adult.

Now, it's a bit like, I mean, listen, we're still obviously going to have, you know, good nights out and parties and stuff and whatever else. But instead of stuff like rolling in at 4am,

I'm like, I've got to get up and I've got to deal with these two. So you lot can do that. And then they'll be like, no, cause we've got to do the same thing. Ah, okay. So we're just going to have a little nightcap and we're all, yeah, we're all off.

Off to bed. Yeah, cool. Off to bed. JLS, Chuck, Tuck or Coco at half 11. Listen. Half 11? Yeah, that's late. Sorry, 10.

10. 10, you're pushing it. I mean, the show finishes, short time the show finishes, but we can, you know, get some sleep in. Kids are up at five sleeping kids are five gotta get your sleep listen it's going to be a whole new experience like the kids are going to be with us on the road at certain times we're going to be that's nice yeah it's just going to be a whole new experience all of us dads all of us older uglier just a little you know a little bit more stop broken than we were a bit more tired

we were talking to paloma faith the other day she'd done a tour with her first and now she's about to tour again but with two kids and she was like i actually don't know how i'm gonna survive this i mean do you know what has she got boys has? Has she got boys? Two girls. Two girls. See, I don't know what, I don't know what the energy is like with girls. It's full on. It's a lot of mental challenges. So this is it.

The mental challenges. This is the mental game with the girls. It's the physical game with the boys. Yeah. It's like, okay, let's stop now. I'm like, no, no, no, let's stop now. We should stop now. Look, it's like, even like it's getting dark outside.

I'm like, oh my God. Like, if you don't, if you do not stop my children in their tracks, pick them up. They'd go all night. Like, like Grayson, right, is a nutter. Honestly, he will go and go and go. Like it will be, I don't know, it could be 11, 11.30 at night. No way. Yeah, yeah. And this is like, obviously before first lockdown.

So it's, you know, like early, early twos, late ones. Still going for it. Like full on. You haven't napped today are you not tired oh he'll love being on tour he's gonna yeah he's gonna love all the lights and the action and everything so this is the problem i'm a bit like there's a lot of stuff on stage i'm like you you look here you need to look here at where you're going because you just your head up and boom gone it's just you pull down like a manhole on the stage or something

i can't wait to hear and see all the tales yes yeah come on annie hit him with it we always ask the same three questions last questions of our guests and the first is quite interesting for you it's how do you want to be remembered and you have your finger in a lot of pies mister you do your acting you do you're singing and dancing on your own you a lot of pies mister you do your acting you do you're singing and dancing on your own you do you sing and dance in for jns you're a dad what's the most important thing to you i'll be in a dad by and a husband by far like i'd give everything up no like and for me to say that and anyone who knows me for me to say that they'd be like, okay. Cause this is,

you know, well, yeah, of course it still is. This is that. That's my life. That's, that's everything I have around me.

Everything I am now was molded by, you know, if I wasn't in this industry, I probably wouldn't have these children, this partner, this, like everything. So it lends to that but the everything has evolved

to the point of me going ah this was all so I could do this you know I mean this was all you know the path and the journey so I could be here and just like yeah i'll have this and then it's all yours now go that's you know to be that dad and partner and that provider as such that's very sweet to hear now from the very serious to the very silly uh what's for tea and who's cooking oh tonight yeah i'll be cooking tonight grace what did he have yesterday? He had... It all rolls into one now. Every day rolls into one. Blurs.

All blurs. Especially the teas. Yeah, the teas. He had spinach bites yesterday, which is good. Get you. Beans and cucumbers. So today he will probably have fish, peas and chips tonight. I'll be a bit of that.

Yeah. So McCauley must be weaning. McCauley just throws it all over the place. So we're like, he can have a bit of that. He can have a bit of ours. Whatever goes in and stays in. Fantastic.

Other than that. I like that attitude to weaning. Yeah. Get the pasta jar out. But wait, are you not having the fish and the chips and the peas? What are you two having? No, no.

So at the minute, I'm actually on the, I say I'm on, we're both on these prep meals. Because I'm taking, yeah, I'm taking this fitness kind of serious. At the minute, I am anyway, just because, you know. In the gym, under the trees. Under the trees. Sorry. Sorry. Basically, I was like, I've got to move that.

You said that I'm looking at one bit now and I've actually got to move that last bit over there. So depressing. But because, yeah, I've got in I've got in really great shape in the first lockdown. Second lockdown really screwed me up, then got back out of shape. So now this one this one's now kind of you know right no get in shape now this is not this is not okay like you've got to flash some abs you've got to do something right yeah we're not taking our tops off for anyone i'll take the top off but i might just leave it like tight around the you know under my chest and just stomach just kind of there's not much manly about a boob tube it's got to be said no like the you

know in the 80s they could have pulled it off so I could bring you know yeah yeah you're right it's not gonna happen so what's in the dinners then what or what isn't in the dinners um I think I've got peanut butter chicken tonight with broccoli and rice and I think Sarah has which looks amazing I was like I wish I got that she's got monkfish with rice very lean fish monkfish

lovely FOMO happening I've got FOMO as well last question over to you so the final question we always ask and it's weird and she made it up so don't blame me guilty you have to imagine that you're tucking annie and i into bed yep in a nice way you have to sing us your family lullaby so when the boys wake up and you fail to

get macaulay to sleep what do you sing to him um the only songs that i've sang to him well apart from my own stuff is he's just he's that kid where he bops along um i was saying fly me to the moon and um you're just too good to be true over to you which you're gonna sing you gotta sing one of them yeah we're waiting um he i actually put it on tiktok i think and it was a bit like because he hears me sing every day and i really switched it up because it's you know i'm always up there so i'd sing as it fly me to the moon let me play among the stars let me see what spring is like on jupiter and mars in other words please be true in other words i love you so yeah oh that just sent shivers down my spine you've done well she normally cries incredible that was incredible oh my kids are seriously short-changed in the

lullaby department by comparison can you come around and sing to my kids no problem he's got to move his gym kit he can't when he's when he's moved the gym kit and they won't even let him in the garden anymore he can come around to mine exactly i think i'm gonna get turfed out yeah oh aston you've been an absolute superstar i could have chatted you for about for the whole Easter weekend in fact the whole we can make it happen if you like it's fine yeah exactly oh thank you so much no thank you pleasure anytime