The Nick DiPaolo Show - 090 - I'm A Victim Whaaa

Episode Date: July 21, 2015

I'm A Victim Whaaa

You're listening to Nick DiPaolo podcast, obviously. If you're listening, you know it's me. It's not like somebody jumped in here and fucking guest hosted this thing. There's no money in it. Jesus Christ. Anyways, how are you? It's, uh, well, I'm doing this on a Saturday. I'm heading out to L.A. tomorrow, which is Sunday.

But you'll hear this Monday night. So, whatever that means to you. I don't know. I just thought I'd put things in perspective. See, I usually do it Monday afternoon. But, again, I won't be here. And the last time I didn't do a podcast, I didn't put one out. I don't know.

You kind of lose a little momentum, both listener-wise and broadcasting chops-wise. So, yeah, I'll release this on Monday night as usual. I'll be doing, I'm going out to L.A. I'll be doing Joe Rogan's podcast, which is awesome. It's like three hours on Wednesday that night performing at the Ventura Harbor Comedy Club. And two days before the day after I get to L.A., Monday, I do Fitzsimmons and Adam Carolla, their podcast. And Carolla puts his out, I think, that day. I don't know about Fitzsimmons and Adam Carolla their podcast and Carolla puts his out I think that day I don't know about Fitzsimmons his might be a few days later I think if I remember correctly but uh so you can hear me on those too um

you know I'm gonna gotta kickstart the album sales that's what you do the sales started flat and you get the hell out there and you do the big ones and uh yeah so anyways i don't know what to talk about folks i mean jesus christ could we could the headlines be more depressing you know what let's start this is what i like to do when i get in a blue mood i like to i like to treat it like well the same way the same way steven tyler would treat his depression on a cold a winter day even though it's July. But I'd like to take a couple of quaaludes, as did Steven Tyler when he wrote my favorite ballad of all time. A little thing called Seasons Of wither. People my age will appreciate it. People 20 can go listen to fucking Jay-Z. Yeah, he wrote this.

He was staying in a farmhouse with Joey Crramer, the drummer, like in the 70s. It was a cold winter day. He was laying in bed all depressed. He went downstairs. Found an old guitar, apparently. They were living near a chicken farm. And he took a couple of Quaaludes. Bang this out.

Maybe that's what I need. Some drugs. To kick up the act a notch. Sing along with me, will you? I'm losing my fucking mind. This is the shit I listened to in high school. Oh. This is the shit I listened to in high school Oh

Good Hearted lady Sleepy Was she Love Of the Devil Brought her

To me Tears of a thousand Drawn to her sin Tears of wisdom Holding me Oh woe is me Holding me Ooh, woe is me I feel so badly for you

Ooh, woe is me I thought this was appropriate because we're going to talk about the victimhood of America. Woe is me. Ohica woe is me oh woe is me fireflies dance in the heat of hound dogs that bathe the moon my ship leaves in the midnight i can't say i'll be back too soon Far, far away Heat of my candle Show me the way

That's right. Heat of my candle. Show me the way That's right. Heat of my candle, show me the way. Seeds of a thousand Drawn to her sin Seeds of a thousand Seasons of wither holding me in. Just a depressing time to be alive. Can't wait for this chooch to get out of office And the idiots that surround him

Anyways I feel so badly for you Anyways What's up kids? Anyways. What's up, kids? For the love of Christ. Just can't get it going today, man. Back to the insomnia.

Back to the can't fall asleep till 2. And wake up around 5.30, 6. Back to that cycle. I thought I had a grasp on it. Again, it's fucked up because, you know, I go to work fucking 14 hours later at night and I'm at the stand and I can't even fucking remember whole chunks right in the middle of a bit. There'll be like three really, you know, the best lines in the bit.

And I just, I'm so mentally burnt. I can't even remember. But other times it works for you. Other times I'm like so tired and there's no inhibition there. And it just, it just, shit just flows out of your mouth. Hold on. I got to turn this fan on. It's 114 centigrade in this motherfucker.

You can probably hear that, but... Eh, so what? Maybe if I put it on low. Hold on. Ooh, woe is me. I feel so sadly for you. I'm back. Yeah, anyways.

So by the time you hear this, I will have done my gig at the Ridgefield Playhouse, which I'm doing tonight. But like I said, you'll hear this on Monday. And I can't wait, actually. It's one of my favorite gigs of the year. But what's funny is you write a lot of material. You develop your act in clubs in New York City, where, you know, it is New York City, so you think you can get away with a lot more.

People are supposed to be hip, even though it says the most politically correct, becoming one of the most horseshit cities to tell jokes in because of the fucking lib slant and the brainwashing of everybody in the audience. Let's face it. It's mostly people in their 20s and they can't help it. They're coming off these college campuses with their heads full of fucking horseshit. And so, you know, I'll write and say mean stuff now just to get the audience going and uh and then it's funny then you go to like ridgefield and uh it can work one or two ways like tarrytown

music hall last time i was there they they seemed uh it's it was very clear there was a gap it's i that i wrote my material in an urban setting and and then brought it out to the bucolic suburbs of tarrytown and some of it didn't sit well that was a couple years ago i'm just saying there is a little bit of adjustment sometimes but i didn't i didn't feel that last year at richfield they were a bunch of kind of angry uh you know let's face it, angry, uh, white people and not angry, but not to my level of anger, but they enjoyed, they enjoyed me blowing some steam off so I can work, uh, one or two ways. But I remember being great last year. So

fingers crossed, but, uh, yeah, there's that mentality. So I was at the stand and um i noticed the upstairs in the restaurant was filled with all girls and i said to the hostess who looks like a woman in her late 20s maybe and i said what's going on how come somebody it's all girls up here she goes yeah well it's girls comedy we just had a girls comedy night show whatever this is the hostess that works there and i said well aren't we past that really you're gonna have a girl's comedy and she goes well like we haven't been kept down for the last she said thousand years i think she met hundred but even either or but see i mean she was so quick to spit that out at me and and you know i was i instead of you know years ago i would

engaged her and i go really all i said was? So you've swallowed that victim horse shit again. You know, years ago I would have said, can you give me an example of a female girl comedian? Can you give me three examples of them not being able to move up the ladder? Because it's just funny. It's just, it's right on the tip of their tongue. They have latched on to the uh you know the black civil rights movement which was a legitimate because we know they had legitimate concerns but uh the the feminist movement is just fucking they are obsessed they can't leave it alone

they're obsessed and it's just being pushed down young people impressionable people on college campuses throats and i wanted to get it, but I don't have the energy anymore. But you can't get away from it. In her mind, she's been kept down, which might happen 50 years ago, you know. But, you know, I said to my wife, have you ever? I said, you're 47. Have you ever not got something because you're a woman?

She was like, never, not once. I asked my sisters that. Nope, not once. Not saying it doesn't happen here and there,

but if you'd listen to these frigging, you know, the Now organization, you'd think it was 1946. God, oh, help me.

Nation of fucking victims. And, uh, god oh help me nation of fucking victims and uh yeah here's i think i have a there's a commercial somebody tweeted me this you guys i know you're thinking you're doing me a favor and you are when you send me stuff that you want me to talk about on the podcast but it also sometimes it hits such a nerve with me that I get so just fucking pissed. It ruins the rest of my day. But there's a Verizon ad out there and, um, I don't know if I should play the ad. I, I, there's a Verizon ad. Hold on a second. Well, anyways, I'll play it. It was a Verizon ad and it's called Inspire Her Mind. And, you know, I was going to debunk it because once again, it's, you know, about math and science and how girls, you know, supposedly when they're

younger, they're interested in it. but by the time they go to high school or whatever it goes from 66 to only 18 of them going into math and science fields and it's implied again that that's somehow there's some type of uh you know sexism going on that's keeping them from this and that this is a verizon commercial mind you a fucking phone company they can't leave it alone for a second you fucking you activists you have no lives most of you have fucking ugly broads that guys don't want to stick a prick in you have nothing else to do so you turn it into your life's cause no offense not all of yous but do you ever see any good-looking feminists and not too many strippers out there huh complaining that theyaining that they're treated shitty.

It's usually, you know, broad with a five o'clock shadow. You know, Eddie Munster haircutting. Here's the commercial, but instead of me debunking it, I said, well, if I do that, they're going to go, oh, you just hate women. You're a guy. You don't know what it's like, blah, blah, blah. But I found a woman online called the Factual Feminist who actually has a clip. And she's analyzing the very commercial that this kid tweeted me. And she's debunking the horseshit that Verizon is putting out there that somehow girls are cheated in math and science and aren't allowed to. The commercial shows a little girl.

And she's playing on the beach she's like picking up stuff and the father's like no you don't want to put that down honey and and then they show her in the bedroom and she's got like a solar system hanging from her from her bedroom ceiling and the mother comes in and goes you're getting ridiculous with that put that stuff away and you get the idea in other words we're not inspiring the little girl's mind. It's all fucking horseshit. But there's a lady here who actually debunks the commercial. Let's listen to some of it. And if you don't like it, kiss my grits. Do girls fall behind in science and engineering

because our society tells them they should be pretty rather than pretty brilliant? Whoa, hey, careful with that. Why don't you hand that to your brother? Well, that's the message of a new Verizon campaign, and the ad has gone viral. Of course. Isn't it time we told her she's pretty brilliant, too?

Encourage her love of science and technology and inspire her to change the world. Now a lot of journalists found the ad enthralling. Both NBC and ABC being powerful. A Slate writer said it was a blast of refreshing cool... The fact that it went viral just shows you how the younger generation is bought into all this horseshit. Well, maybe there's a bunch of people like me out there who viewed it because they couldn't believe what they were seeing.

It brought tears to the eyes of a reporter at Adweek. But so far, not one of these excited reporters thought to check the facts. They never do. Now here are just a few examples of dubious information that concern the factual feminist. For example, confidence drops from 72% to 55% between middle school and high school. Well, what's the source? Verizon provides a list of references via a link called dive deeper into each of our stats. But the source cited for the confidence drop is an internet infographic posted by someone

associated with a website about online engineering degree programs. And what does this confidence gap really mean? I mean, does it? That's their source. That's their source to put out a message that's going to go out to millions of people in a Verizon ad. Some obscure website. Somebody's opinion on it. That's what they use for a fucking source. And of course, NBC and ABC are jerking off all over it. Refer to confidence in math and science or overall self-esteem. That is never explained and no source is offered. Why is Verizon relying on some random, poorly sourced Internet graphic for its research?

Let's continue. According to the ad, 66% of fourth grade girls reported that they like science and math, but by college, only 18% of all engineering majors are female. ABC deemed this fact startling. Well, startling, yes. But it's also deeply misleading. Engineering is an outlier. Today, girls earn 44% of college math degrees,

48% of chemistry degrees, and 61% of biology degrees. Did you hear that? So there aren't too many dads and moms going, put that down. You're not interested in that. Let your brother play with the power drill. It's all fucking horseshit.

But again, that's what they do. The left hand is away. You're a victim. You're a victim. White male patriarchy is keeping you down. Because they've got so, it's been so successful for them, this campaign and

using that you're a racist you're sexist you're homophobe you massage they have they have gained so much political capital uh from doing that why why would they stop but it's just it's it's unbelievable it's just a brainwashing again and you listen to this commercial it sounds like it's 1955 but why allow some inconvenient fact to get in the way of a powerful, short-changed girl narrative? Suppose you said 66% of fourth grade girls like science and math, but by college only 61% of all biology majors are females. I mean, that doesn't quite do the trick. And what's the source for the 66% statistic?

I don't doubt it's truth, but Verizon cites a post from the feminist blog Jezebel. They go to a blog, a blog, to get copy for a national commercial. Do you see how it works, folks? At least you're seeing the machinations

of how a country's been brainwashed into politically correct horseshit. This has been going on forever. This is a current commercial, but I called out a Diet Coke commercial back in the, you know, 90s, one of my early albums, and picked up on it about, it had girls whistling at a guy.

You know how guys at a construction site whistling a girl walking by it was the reverse and i had a whole take on really you think we're going to get offended if three girls want to blow us you know behind a dumpster at a construction site whatever that wasn't i'm paraphrasing my own joke but um um it's been going on forever is my point and it's really it's finally taken hold and it's come to fruition because we have a couple generations believing this horse shit now, including, you know, the young girl that I talked to at the stand. The facts behind the Inspire Her Mind campaign are a complete mess. And the deeper you dive, the worse it gets. Now, you might think even if the statistics are muddled, maybe there's a truth in the spirit of the video, but that would be wrong.

In one pivotal scene, Samantha's curiosity in marine biology is squelched by her father. Sam, honey, you don't want to mess with him. Put him down. Now from this scene, you would never guess that girls today earn 64 percent of college degrees in marine biology and in another 64 64 appearing to study a poster announcing a science fair however she is using the display case as a mirror to put on her lip gloss that was pretty cool though i gotta give them that one at the end of the commercial they show a young girl looking at an ad for a science fair thing in a window. And you think she's reading that, but she's actually putting on lipstick. That was a pretty good turn. Again, it's based on horse shit, but whoever thought of that angle?

That's more original than anything you'll see in a movie. Did I talk to you guys? Wait a minute. Have I talked to you since the Amy Schumer premiere? I'm going to talk about that that write that down real quickly uh anyways you get the point i just thought we'd debunk it it has more credibility when a a woman is debunking this feminist horseshit propaganda that's been being you know disseminated and it doesn't mean i hate women and it doesn't mean any guy who agrees

with me hates women it's just you gotta stop with the victim horseshit you gotta stop unbelievable and then there's so many examples of this shit this week um i'm going through i'm flipping through uh you know i'm'm on the internet. And I see, I see, what's his name? Dr. Drew Pinsky. Whatever the fuck his name is. And he's having a discussion, roundtable discussion about Caitlyn Jenner, who was on the ESPYs. I didn't even bother watching it this year you know i watched the first couple years and i go you know these are pretty well done

but espn and which is owned by disney is so at the forefront of political correctness and all the horseshit i was just telling you about that i didn't even bother tuning in i saw clips and by the way people are telling me he looks good as a woman. Even my wife's trying to tell me he looks good as a woman. He looks like a guy in drag. I wouldn't fuck that. And I'm not too fussy. Oh, I can't. I'm married. But I'm just saying, if I wasn't. Looks like a tight end for the New York Giants in the late 70s in a dress. Is he going to fix his voice and shit? You telling me you got the tits and everything and you got the face down, the cheekbones and you're going to, hi, how do you like my pussy? How's it look? Hmm. It's a little

disconcerting to have that voice come out of a, you know, what's supposed to be a woman. Please tell me he's going to take hormones and fix the voice, no? Maybe that's not how it goes. And I know he still has a cock, so I'm very confused at this point. Almost as confused as him. But anyways, he got an award. Caitlin got an award. She, I should say, got an award.

Get the pronoun right. For something most courageous whatever and they were dr drew penske was having a discussion there was a black uh entertainment journalist there there was some woman who i couldn't stomach for five minutes then there was a guy named zoe torr t-uR, who's a transgender reporter, entertainment reporter. I guess he used to be, you know, like a, I guess he was a military, army guy, a hero or whatever. I don't know his background completely. And then there was Ben Shapiro, who works for Breitbart, which is a right-leaning, you know, kind of a conservative website. And Ben Shapiro wasn't having any of it.

Anyways, they all get, they all, it. Anyways, they get in an argument. They start arguing. And it was so funny. You had the black entertainment guy pissed at Caitlyn because he's saying he's acting like he knows what it's like to walk in somebody's footsteps. Whose civil rights have been violated he's just nothing but a rich white woman now it was so friggin hilarious and and then everybody hated ben shapiro because he wasn't having any of it he was saying she's not courageous she doesn't deserve an award for what which i you know agree with and uh anyways it gets into it was so funny because it just sums up

our nation let me play a little bit uh for you because it was just six people trying to they they were getting pissed at who was a bigger victim. That was the argument. It was fucking hilarious. It just sums up the times of living. It was I mean, just friggin. I couldn't believe what I was watching. Caitlyn Caitlyn Jenner honored with the arthur ash courage award at the sbs did she deserve it was it the right choice here she was last night on abc

take a look all across the world at this very moment there are young people coming to terms with being transgender they're learning that they're different and they're trying to figure out gender they're learning that they're different and they're trying to figure out how to handle that I didn't mean to play the whole clip I wanted to get to this they're getting bullied they're getting beaten up they're getting murdered and they're committing suicide but this transition has been harder on me than anything I could imagine and that's the case for so many others besides me it's been hard on us to reason alone Kate Trans people deserve something vital they deserve your respect I'd like to thank

personally my buddy Diane so You know personally my buddy Diane so you know all right get to it I should edit the clip story the first time once and Diane you did it so authentic Ben Shapiro's gonna shoot this time joining me now in the audience entertainment journalist Zoe tour pilot and reporter who herself is transgender and Ben Shapiro senior editor Breitbart News author of bullies Ben does she deserve this award for what for courageously coming forward for having been an athlete of great prowess and now fighting a new battle what exactly is the battle I mean

definition is what you do and my baby's doing it 18 months old I wasn't aware that you get a medal for it she good i think she's a fraud i thought the message is clear i just hit the wrong clip anyway it doesn't matter um that's the black guys and i think she's a fraud because she's just a rich white woman now and then uh then at the end, Ben Shapiro, you know, who was holding his ground, saying it's not courageous. And he actually thinks it's, you know, like a mental illness or whatever, whether you can agree or disagree. But he's sitting next to that Zoe Turr, who's the transgender, who looks like a guy in a wig is what he looks like. He makes Caitlyn look like a piece of ass. But so, you know, Ben Shapiro's holding his own, going against political correctness, saying this is, you know, she doesn't deserve this award.

It's a bunch of horseshit. And then this Zoe Turr guy puts his arm like around Ben Shapiro, who's just like a little Jewish guy in a suit. And Ter goes, if you keep that up, you're going to go home in an ambulance or something to that effect. So we have a guy slash woman in a dress threatening a guy in a suit who has the balls to disagree with a lot of this politically correct horse shit. While a black journalist, entertainment journalist, is pissed pissed saying she's a fraud for different reasons she's not as big a victim as let's say black people and there was a woman in there yelling at ben shapiro too because and then there was a kind of a mexican guy who was pissed at ben shapiro saying you're not being you're just being insensitive i guess ben shapiroiro referred to Mr. Turr as a sir

because Ben Shapiro saying you still have male parts and male biology so you're still a guy and that's when Mr. Turr threatened him. But just seeing a woman, a guy dressed like a woman in a dress and yes I know it's more than that. I'm trying to be

as respectful as I can. Threatening a guy in a suit while another black guy's pissed. And then, hey, I think another guy who's Latino was yelling at Ben Shapiro for, you know damn well that was wrong to say that

and insensitive. A fucking clusterfuck to victimhood. Just a clusterfuck. Meanwhile, we have four Marines and a sailor gunned down

by some piece of shit who've been radicalized online. And we're going, ooh, is that a one-off? Is he a lone wolf? And we're playing that game still instead of just going, no, it's part of fucking Islamic extremism is all it is. But we're scratching our chin and have to fucking analyze it. Shot to death, by the way, at a military recruiting center where no guns are allowed. Boy, are we asleep at the fucking switch.

Holy shit. But meanwhile, this argument's going on. I couldn't help it. And then, like I said, I went on Twitter and this kid sends me the commercial. And even my wife got into the act. A couple nights ago, we're flicking through Netflix, or she was, and she had to come downstairs and tell me that they actually have a category, movies with female strong leads.

That's one of the categories. Oh, God, help me, will you please? Is anybody sitting home fucking saying that? that oh i want to see a movie with a you know a female strong lead is there really and if you are doing that and you know you're kidding yourself a progressive and shit yeah you're the one who wants to live in a a uh genderless society a colorblind society yet you keep you keep this shit alive by making categories like uh you know movies with a female and a strong lead role isn't i mean just fucking infuriating i'm gonna fucking smash his fucking face in

that was mr turr talking to mr shapiro but i i fucking belly laugh and again and here's a i want you there's a couple books and i've people i've referred people to these books for years now because i still haven't read anything better on the subjects but the nation of victims christ had come out over 20 years ago uh by charles j sykes just read that it really puts into perspective and of course slouching towards Gamora by Judge Robert Bork those are those are the two that really explain you know that's where I you know it opened my eyes to how men are

betrayed by Hollywood and shit and and you know there's a reason that dad is betrayed as a fucking idiot it's about you know it's's a reason the dad is portrayed as a fucking idiot. It's about, you know, it's about the nuclear family and how the dad, you can't control the whole nation of people's minds if you have the nuclear family, you know, with somebody with an authoritative figure running the family. You have to get rid of him first and that's why

they go after dads and make them such idiots in commercials and fucking shit it's really fascinating to read it really is uh just one after another the commercials with the dumb dads and and and uh there was one a few years ago i i didn't even realize our buddy tom shalhoub who who, by the way, ironically, is a conservative. I think he's the new host of Red Eye. But once again, Verizon, people, Verizon, you know, they don't understand their communications company. They're more into social engineering. Again, they're just obsessed. They can't leave this shit alone.

But there was a commercial with Tom Shalhoub in it, playing the dumb dad. And I guess it was so bad. And this was like five years ago, it got so many complaints to Variety that they actually had to eliminate the commercial. They took it down.

Yeah. I guess, Son of a Gun, I don't have the clip, but you can Google it. He's just his daughter. You don't have the clip, but you can Google it. He's just his daughter. You don't have to hear it. I can explain it to you.

His daughter's at a computer, and he's like, oh, it's like a really fast, it's like an encyclopedia. And she's like, you know, she's like eight, and she's like, dad, it is an encyclopedia. And then the fucking bitchy, his bitchy wife has to go, Tom, weren't you supposed to wash the dog? You know, in her fucking tone. Oh, God. And then she goes, Tom, leave her alone. Oh, my God. Just.

They pulled it. I don't even remember hearing about that. I got to ask Tom Shalhoub about that. It's ironic he was in such a thing that I would think he would be against. But hey, we all have to do something for money, right? But just remember that if you're looking for a, looking for a movie on Netflix,

you can actually go to the category Strong Female Leads. I don't go to the movies anymore, just for that reason. I can't, I can't suspend my disbelief. I can't watch, you know, fucking Catwoman, an actual woman beat up 11 guys. And I can't suspend my disbelief. Or, you know, G.I. Jane or whatever the fuck.

I just can't do it. Can you? I don't. Can you? Can you? What the hell else? Girl at the stand. Oh, the girl at the...

Yeah, they all portray themselves as victims. Seems like anybody under 28 now, under 30, and I was at the stand the other night, and a girl up front in her 20s, you know, cute, five minutes into my act, she's sitting a foot from me, she's in the front table, a foot from the stage, takes out her phone and starts fucking texting, and then I ask her to put it away and she's like oh it's friends of mine they want to they want to see you which is total bullshit i go hang up the phone please she hangs it up i look down four minutes later she's texting again and she goes i'm

sorry she says here's what makes me fucking crazy they apologize when you call them out on this shit i'm sorry. And I go, you're not fucking sorry because it's the second time I've asked you. And then she did it a third time and I lost my shit. I didn't lose my shit like I used to. But, you know, I gave her a good tongue lash. And everybody was on my side because she was fucking up the show. And then some idiot fucking tweets me and goes,

DePaulo, fan of yours, but that show was a disaster the other night. Don't argue with the audience. Just do your act. And no, I'm not a liberal. That's what he puts at the end of it, which means he was a fucking liberal. Why even bring that up? It had nothing to do with it. But in his eyes, and here's what's wrong with it.

Here's what's wrong with the world and his eyes. I was the fucking problem. Not the girl who was fucking up the show. I asked to shut off her phone three times. It was arguing with me. It didn't get ugly, you know, but he thought I should try to ignore that, which makes him a bigger fucking idiot than her. Ignore that.

Which makes him a bigger fucking idiot than her. He thought the show was a disaster because of that. Which is just the opposite. If I went to see a comedian and there was a chance he was going to lose his cool and shit, which means he's in the moment, that's a good show. That's not a bad thing. You know? But they sure don't act like they... These girls sure don't't act like victims they couldn't be more cocky and arrogant guys too another kid to be fair at caroline's the next

night guy kid at caroline's he was in his 20s a big handsome kid that's the fucking yeah see you can't do that folks and i've mentioned this on the show before we don't know we we see a phone lit up we don't know that if you're recording the show which has happened you could be recording us and and then they throw the shit up on youtube because they have no fucking respect for people's material everything should be theirs and and then you burn all that material that a comedian's working on for an album or whatever right so that's why and then and just for plain courteous reasons you shouldn't be doing that but for somehow this kid interpreted that as i was the problem you know and didn't even bring it up in his little fucking tweet that's the other thing don't start an argument me on twitter because i'm not going to do it in a fucking 140 characters

uh lord, lordy. I don't know. Why is everyone so fucking stupid? I don't know, Dink Shopper Singhal. Why aren't more people interrogating?

Like me. The Caroline show was good. The whole table of like, I think they were Indian people. I didn't really ask. That would be racist, you know.

What if I was wrong and they were Pakistani? Just like with the shooting that happened in Chattanooga, which apparently is the new normal. You have to worry about getting gunned down now in America. That's an act of war is what it is. I don't give a fuck. Well, it wasn't done by a foreign army. Yeah, please.

Please, stop with your nonsense. Imagine not having guns at a... I know it's a recruitment center, and I know there are laws because it looks like a banana republic. If you have the military at a strip mall with guns and shit, I understand all that. But you can't have them inside. I mean, and the world we're living in today, it all seems orchestrated. It really does. It's really kind of frightening.

But the kid that did the shooting, I mean, he didn't just turn like that overnight. And everybody's asking, well, why didn didn't his friends they must have seen the change in them and whatever you know just the beard alone and you're like oh that'd be profile but that's just the point what if one of them said you know our friend is getting a little weird maybe we should call the fbi on them and turns out they were wrong and then you're you're deemed a racist and a bigot for the rest of your life. That's why this shit's so effective. It's a combination, a lethal combination of our political correctness being blinded by that horse shit

and their ruthlessness, you know, combined with social media. That's a fucking equation for disaster, you know? It's unbelievable. And one of the guys is 19. I mean, he's texting his girlfriend when he gets killed. The last text he sent her said active shooter or whatever. But this is going to be the new normal. It's going to be just like Israel.

You know, in Israel, soft targets like hotels and malls and there's armed guards everywhere. And that's going to be the new norm. How sad, huh? How sad. The only way to take care of that is, you know, you got to take care of it over there before they come over here. But it looks like they're already here. before they come over here, but it looks like they're already here.

The U.S. government gave 127,000 visas to young people from Muslim countries last year. Or in one year. 127,000. Yikes. Yikes. Anyways. What the hell else did I have today? Ridgefield.

Tennessee shooting. Hmm. Verizon commercial. Strong. Do you look for a strong lead? Female lead when you go to the movies? Girls? I don't even know girls that like a lot of this. I mean, who agree with a lot of this shit.

But then again, I'm 53. But, you know. Gotta stop with the wah-wah victim horseshit. I was reading an article about Adam Sandler online. You know, his last... he hasn't made much money. His last four or five movies, three or four movies have been real. You know. He used to, look, he never made good movies.

We all know that. But they were always profitable. But I guess now they're going in the tank. And the last one he was making involved, he was, one of the scenes involved, like Indians, Native Americans or whatever. And, you know, there's jokes in there about Native Americans. make in involved he was uh one of the scenes involved like uh indians native americans or whatever and uh you know there's jokes in there about native americans and whatever and um and in the auditions for another movie he did it called for women should be dressed in black tight knit whatever so now you know of course some of the actresses were offended on the set, I guess, the Native American thing.

And so now Adam Sandler is too edgy. We have Jerry Seinfeld and Adam Sandler are politically, too politically incorrect for the Hollywood crowd. Can you, did you ever think you'd see the day ever? But the whole article was, you know, he's going to stop making movies. But, you know, he made studios so much money. They probably feel like they owe him. You know? They say he's ruthless in negotiations and shit.

Which is good. Good he's a businessman. And no, he's actually a big republican believe it or not but again you don't announce that until you have millions in the bank if you're smart or you do it like me you're gonna be talking to a mic in your basement you do it before you're even close to famous yeah so can you imagine though that that's the times we're freaking living in i don't know man it's a sad situation that's about it uh sports news again you'll hear this monday but uh the british open has been suspended today i guess uh bad weather who had a guest over in scotland uh tiger woods as of yesterday was in 129th place out of like 156 players.

He's done. He's finished. Stick a fork in him. He's fucking finished. He's not even an average golfer anymore. That woman's pussy really put a curse. I don't know what she did to him. Mother of God.

She put some type of Swedish curse on him or whatever he is just fucking oof um yeah all-star game mike trout first guy in the history of major league baseball to get the mvp award two consecutive all- games. What a stud this kid is. Watched him last night. The Red Sox are in Anaheim. That's how they opened their second half. Last night, guy for the Sox, Wade Miley, lefty, pitched like a no-hitter into the seventh inning against a good offensive team.

It goes into the ninth. I mean, they had taken him out. Anyways anyways, long story short, bottom of the ninth. Bottom of the ninth, Mike Trout comes up. 0-0 game with two outs. Ojihara closes on him on. He takes him deep. I don't know why you're trying to throw an 88-mile-an-hour fastball past Mike Trout, MVP of the All-Star Game.

Took it deep in the Sox lows. Stayed up to watch that. Anyways. What the hell else? I got that pit in my stomach because I know I'm traveling tomorrow. I know a few people are like that. Got that pit in my stomach. Just knowing I'm going to be on a plane for six hours. And the part that makes me the most mental is, again, when they start to board and people

start moving towards the thing and they haven't even started calling first class. That makes me mentally crazy. But, yeah, six-hour flight. I'll get out there, get the car, rent the car, and buzz around. And it'll be good, man. Brogan Show is killer. Same with Fitzsimmons, man. I get just a ton of, it kicks up everything. It kicks up all kinds of activity on your Twitter.

And I'll plug the special, Another Senseless Killing at nickdip.com. Remember, if you put in the code Nick or radio, you get three bucks off at this point. And I'll plug that in.

Then, you know, Ventura Harbor Comedy Club, Wednesday night. Haven't been on the West Coast, haven't done comedy out there in a long time, because again, we've been through this. I was going to stay at the same place that I stayed at the last time, but they've renovated it. Last time I stayed there was like 160 a night. They want three bills a night now. Renovated. What's there, a fucking hooker in every minibar? Christ's sake, you double the price?

Are you kidding me? Yeah. What do I got coming up? Oh, the premiere I didn't talk about, Amy Schumer's premiere, did I, where the hell was I, no, that was a Tuesday, in, you know, Alice Tully Hall, which is in Lincoln, you know, Lincoln Center, big beautiful theater, I don't know how many hundreds of people, packed, I'm sitting there, and there's like a red-headed guy with freckles in front of me. And I go, who is this guy?

He's either a professional sports or he's an actor. I've seen his face a million times. He's looking at me. He's looking over his wife's shoulder like he knows me. We keep making eye contact. It's kind of weird. And then Keith Robinson comes and sits down next to me who was in the movie it was very funny by the way he had a scene where he calls john senna you know

the fucking muscular wrestler calls him out in a movie theater hey matt walberg shut your bitch's mouth it's the movie's really funny look it's it's the typical you know guys are sensitive pussies and and amy is like a guy and that's true because i know her but uh you know she knows herself well so she wrote and and and but again you know lebron john lebron james plays the role of like bill hader's best friend who's who would be the equivalent of the sensitive girlfriend you know the girlfriend that goes i don't want you to hurt my friend Diane. Don't just fuck her and break up with her. That's the role like LeBron James.

Everything's reverse. It's all gender reversal. It's everything we've been talking about for the last 40 minutes. But it's really, I mean, Judd Apatow, I mean, nails it. He knows how to do this shit. And Amy wrote the thing. So it's funny. It's really frigging funny from beginning to end.

And LeBron James is fucking great in it. I mean, the guy can act. I mean, it's fun. I haven't been in a theater forever to see like a comedy in a live movie theater. I told you I don't go to them because I get too distracted. But, oh, yeah, so I'm sitting there looking at the guy, the redhead, and Keith Robinson sits down. I go, isn't that the coach of the fucking Cowboys?

And he's like, I mean, yeah, it is, man. He taps his shoulder. You know, Garrett, right? What was his last name? Jason Garrett, I want to say. God, I hope I got that right. But, yeah, sure enough, he turns around and shakes me and Keith's hands, and, you know

and i'm like what the fuck's he doing here and then uh turns out tony romo has a small part in amy's movie and uh it's killer it came out uh what it even came out. So it was fun. Had a couple drinks before the movie. And went to the after party at Tavit on the Green. And I'm standing two feet away from LeBron at the bar. I just, I don't like to bug people. Even when, you know, I could say, hey, I'm a friend of Amy's, whatever. I just don't, I don't do it.

But what struck me, he wasn't this massive guy. He's really thin now, as you guys know that follow hoops. But he's standing at the bar with his glasses and his sharp suit. And just, I don't know, I just really like that guy. I've said it before on this podcast. I don't get that punky arrogance that you get from guys the king of the world, man. As far as athletes go. I just don't get any of that vibe from him.

Whether it's on TV or whatever. But yeah, if you get a chance, check it out. There's a strong female lead in the movie for you girls who won't see anything but that. Amy's is funny as hell. I mean, fucking she is really funny in this. She does it all, man. I mean, it's very impressive.

Very impressive. And I had a few drinks. And then I'm trying to get into the VIP area. First of all, they had the red carpet. But, you know, before the movie, it was like an enclosed long tent with windows. So you could look into the tent, see who's being on the red carpet. And me and Gary Gullman noticed Colin Quinn was being interviewed by ETB or something. And the reporter had his back to us.

So me and Gullman were giving Colin Quinn the finger through the window. And then I turn around and the guy interviewing him gives us the finger. I wonder why. That type of behavior. I wonder why I'm sitting here with no juice in Hollywood. But, yeah, then Tavern on the Green. So I'm trying to get into the VIP area. I'm already in the, you know, where everybody else is.

And then there's a little area within tavern on the green where you know amy and colin and whoever else judd apatow um so i was trying to get in there there's a doorman there i had a by this time i had a few of me and i i handed him my ticket that got me into the party but you need another kind of type of badge to get into the vip or like a strip club i'm like what the fuck i know the broad she's three feet away and he's like no you can't come and i hear behind me i hear no that's not gonna work stupid and it's fucking norton jim norton and i go oh i go you didn't just see all that did you he starts belly laughing he goes yeah

it just happened to me and i think florentine was with him and then judd apatow just happened to come around the corner seeing us argue with his big black door we're not arguing with him we were just laughing that we couldn't and he goes i can't and judd apatow goes you let these guys in that apatow is one cool dude man i mean he he really he's just like the guy that i met uh during the youngian special years ago. And some guys stay humble, you know. Imagine what he's worth. So he let us in there and, you know,

for like five seconds. And then, you know, I quietly took off to the Irish exit out of the party and say bye to anybody and just sprinted all the way to the parking garage, out of the party and say bye to anybody and just sprinted all the way to the parking garage which was 51 and so uh yeah oh and then the emmy nomination that we were so i was sort of hoping for we know it's a long shot but they did submit my scene and paul giamatti got

it which is no surprise and uh, I was a tiny bit disappointed. Who doesn't want to get nominated for something? Couldn't hurt the fucking career, right? But Giamatti, I love. So I hope he wins. That way, you know, his career is fine. But I like the more we see him, the better. But that would have been nice.

But what are you going to do? What are you going to do? I don't think it helped that, like, when I did the, you know, the Larry the Cable Guy roast. I called the audience, you know, I gave them the finger and said something about them. I don't know. But they laughed. But, I mean, they know. Anyways, kids, that is it.

So enjoy the rest of your Monday night slash Tuesday morning. I'll be back in a couple days. You know, keep your chin up. Thank you very much. Thank you. So, I'll talk be getting there. Fuck, he's stupid. Why aren't my people in carry?

Fuck you. And I'm not gonna take it all the life down. Cause once I get started, I go to town. Cause I'm not like everybody else. I'm not like everybody else. I'm not like everybody else. I'm not like everybody else. I'm not like everybody else. And I don't want to be destroyed. I'm not like everybody else.

And I don't want to be destroyed. I'm not like everybody else. Good day, everybody. guitar solo I'm out.