The Nick DiPaolo Show - 173 - MSM is the Enemy! More Milo!
Episode Date: February 21, 2017MSM is the Enemy! More Milo!...
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You're listening to Nick DiPaolo on the Riotcast Network, riotcast.com. well how are you folks happy president's day the nick topala podcast itunes version
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how are you folks you know what today is today is a president's day yeah sure
yeah let's cut to chapacoy hillary's house And you blew it!
You blew it!
It's got to be a painful day. Got to be a painful day for that lady
Maybe not
She could be soused
That doesn't sound good
I live right near her, you realize that
Not as nice a neighborhood as hers
But you know
I could hit her house with a rock
Sort of like the people throwing rocks at Trump's motorcade.
More of those open-minded jerk-offs.
Anyhow, contributions to the show.
Thank you so much, Kevin Ford.
You've made like three or four in the last week or so.
There's Kevin Ford again.
And Callum McKeever with a nice fat one.
Callum, thanks, pal.
John Jay, my buddy, John J. IV with another contribution.
Darren J. Card, a regular
contributor to the show. Kevin Ford
again and again. Thank you guys
so much. That is the lifeblood of the show.
Keep it coming. It's like the
Jerry Lewis telethon. Without the
donations, the kids wouldn't have
crutches and wheels. Now back to the show.
What? What kind of shit is that? Had a great
time in Laugh, Boston this weekend.
I'll play a little clip.
This is off my phone,
so if it doesn't sound perfectly good,
kiss my grits.
But it was such a killer time up there.
I just wanted to play a minute of the second show.
I think it was Saturday night.
How you doing, sir?
I'm a fucking Republican.
Look, Jesus, you got to like me.
That's a...
Twice. I feel like Luke Gingrich's Stockholm Gang. I'm a fucking Republican. What? Jesus, you gotta like me with that suit. Twice. I feel like
Luke Gingrich's doppelganger.
Or you could be a gay woman from the Democrats.
Fucking
son of a hateful guy. Anyway, sorry about
straight to being
whitey bulges, neck of the woods.
As I'm telling
jokes, I'm standing on a bone. Some guy
buried a fucking few years ago that had been
killed in a kitchen.
Oh, nice wet cloth lady, thanks for coming out of the boat.
Keep those borders wide open, what could come in, huh?
who knows that diseases are coming back that we wiped out in 12 a.d people coming over dressed like that in the old testament i'm not supposed to make a fucking
i saw three wise men getting out of a range rover newton yesterday Anyways, that was just the first 30 seconds of the second show Saturday night.
I have never, I got to tell you folks, you know, I'm always a little, I don't know, I've been doing it almost 30 years.
It's, it feels like shoveling shit against a tide lately. And you know,
but it doesn't feel that way lately with the special coming out and the
places Boston was packed.
And it always isn't that way for me.
I know it's my hometown,
but I don't get back there much,
but laugh Boston.
It was oversold Saturday night,
but Friday night was sold out.
Both shows Saturday night was sold out.
Um,
I mean,
teaming with people and just just it felt like when I started
in Boston uh just I don't know I've been working a lot I'm in fighting shape that with uh a lot of
DePaulo podcast t-shirts in the audience I am really like I'm I'm getting a uh re-energized
a shot in the ass like being at a Trump rally. It was just great.
And Laugh Boston, for my fellow comics listening,
I don't know why you'd listen to another comics podcast,
unless it's Rogan's, and then you can't help it.
It's everywhere.
But what a gig.
Western Hotel, which is four stars, and the club is in the hotel,
and there's only one show on Friday night.
What more can you friggin' ask?
I mean, and thank you to uh joe rogan because i can't tell you how many people came up and said uh yeah i
heard you on rogan's podcast it's i guess it's like jesus christ it's more powerful than any
morning radio show i'm gonna do oh that's my phone ringing because i forgot to hide it god damn it
anyhow uh and thank you to steven crowder
who was on the joe rogan show and plugged my special like i asked him to right in the middle
of a beef with joe uh and i love both those guys i watched a little of it it was making me so
uncomfortable um but two you know headstrong guys two smart guys and and joe smoking that pipe while
he's fucking arguing have me crying and um i think i'm more
like rogan when it comes to you know debating and shit you start saying fuck face and uh
that's why you gotta listen to podcasts i mean that's it's just anyway thanks to both those guys
uh i got really drunk uh both nights actually but the second night i usually
drive home right after the show right because i like to wake up in my own bed but i went no
it feels i'm talking all these very funny young open mic is from boston they had a show on after
me i was watching these guys let me tell you about boston folks as far as comedy it's like what mecca
is to muslims it's just loaded with talent that
probably made no fucking sense but i said it anyways i've watched a couple of i think a guy
named was dave mcdonough i think i don't know um but uh this kid drew who was the mc this weekend
told me to watch this kid or maybe it was somebody else i was so drunk but i think the guy's name was
dave mcdonough this is why i love him he won the boston comedy competition which is saying a lot and he just said fuck it he quit comedy right
after he's like i'm not going through all that shit but he was i guess he's you know i just gotta
urge him not to quit completely he was there that night doing comedy so whatever um yeah so what a
great trip what a great gig packed and by the way I've sold out like 90% of my shows in 2017.
Now, I don't know if that's because the Trump winds are blowing.
And I don't know.
And I know Joe Rogan's thing didn't hurt this weekend.
And also comics come home back in November.
I stirred up a little shit.
But who knows?
People must have said who were there that night.
Hey, this guy thinks like me.
He's not into groupthink like the left is,
which we'll demonstrate in the next 45 minutes.
Anyhow, Louis C.K., my old roommate,
here I am at the club at Laugh Boston,
and Louis is up the street Thursday and Friday night.
That was my competition.
Louis is at the Wang Center.
My old buddy Joe List opening for him.
So my old roommate Louie's at the Wang Center.
So guess what?
I get a text from Joe List.
Hey, we're going to go to Del Frisco's after.
So went to Del Frisco Steakhouse.
Me, Louie, and a couple other guys, Joe List.
And how fucking cool is that though me and louie
started it years ago years ago late 80s and uh here we are and uh louie ordered a glass of wine
that was like i don't know 175 at all he asked me to guess i go 170 and i know nothing about wine
and he almost shit i almost nailed it and i tasted wine. And I'm not like a big red wine guy.
Fucking, oh, my God.
I'm like, this is what red wine's supposed to taste like.
It was the best fucking thing I ever drank in my life.
Just a sip.
And then I knocked the glass over on purpose out of jealousy.
No, I didn't.
Oh, my God.
But, yeah.
And, of course, you know, Louie buys dinner.
So I could have had like an $80 steak.
But, no, right before Joe List texted me, I had eaten about 11 pounds of the shitty chicken fingers at the comedy club.
So I couldn't even fucking have a steak.
There was no room.
But what a fun night.
Really fucking cold where Del Frisco's late.
We keep it open.
Thanks to Louie.
They keep it open late for us.
And it was just one of those nights that we'll be looking back on
in a few years going that was already seven years ago but uh you know you have you have a few nights
like that those are the ones that stick out in my mind that and the one when uh uncle willie
touched me back in the fifth grade those seem to stick out speaking of that we'll get to milo in a seconds uh mama mama mama what is going on um
what do we want to talk about first oh i don't know there's a ton of shit
just locally i was laughing in the new york paper no no i mean not funny the story itself but this
young kid and pulled out a gun in Brooklyn somewhere you know
like a pellet gun trying to hold up a bodega and ends up getting killed which is not the funny part
but uh I what I found funny about it you know they always interview the people that run the
bodega or the convenience store whatever you want to call it you're part of the woods and I've read
about three stories I'd say in the last year and a half
where one of the witnesses' name was Muhammad Ali.
It's just, why is that funny?
Well, it's just kind of funny.
It shows how many Muslims are here.
Excuse me.
And they interviewed Muhammad Ali.
And he said, I never saw him before.
I said, the worker, Muhammad Ali.
I'll do it, Muhammad Ali.
He took two six-packs of Corona.
Then he put a gun to my face.
He threatened to kill me.
I told him it was on camera.
He got scared and he ran off.
A little while later, I heard gunshots fired down the block.
He was dead.
Nothing had beat me but for the time.
He stuck a gun to my face trying to take a corona end up dead
that's my ali for you folks but i'm just saying that's like the third story with muhammad ali in
it and then joe frazier tried to steal some twinkies i shot him in the ass he's a dumb
looking gorilla motherfucker i shoot him again ho joe ho joe
i don't know i just keep finding stories of Muhammad Ali in them.
But there's always sad stories
like that in the fucking Bronx
and Bushwick and Brooklyn
and it's the same shit.
Where's that coming from?
Not on the Monday show, please.
No feedback on the Monday show.
Okay.
God damn you.
Speaking of Boston and South Boston,
and my city's so liberal, my old hometown,
just loves their fucking government
and thought this story was kind of related to it.
And the story in the Boston Herald,
76-year-old Southie lady,
by the way that's what
left boston and is in south boston you know whitey bulger's old stomping grounds that the whole place
has been gentrified in his beautiful restaurant it's like san francisco east it really is only
even more liberal oh it's really getting fucking disgusting but um it's a beautiful they've really
did a beautiful job
with the waterfront in South Boston.
But why am I talking about, 76-year-old lady from Southie
was cited for failing to shovel her walk.
She received, yeah, a fine of $200, the city sent her
for not shoveling her walk out front.
I guess her son runs an insurance company out of the,
and there's a law with businesses. And even personal people can get hit with like a small fine but if you have a business
i guess if you're just a resident it's a 50 fine if you don't shovel your sidewalk in the winter
but she's 76 for fuck's sake she's got my hips and knees can we cut her some slack but i'm just
making the point there's the love of your government okay just fucking horrible people
actually trying to defend the government doing that lorraine walsh so people saw the story on uh
you know online and they wanted to kick in to pay for the 200 fine she's a lifelong resident
she's one of 500 people hit with citations for failing to shovel their sidewalk see uh the key word there is their sidewalks uh she said she had no problem dealing with last
thursday storm but could only chip away half the ice left by sunday's rapid uh freezing slush yeah
because she's fucking 76 uh but like i said her brother uh I guess her brother John operates an insurance
company out of the out of the part of the home so they get tagged for $200
it's just fucking ridiculous again government up your ass telling you what kind of toilets
and light bulbs to get the fuck out of here keep voting democrat you like that shit
if you slip on the ice you're an ass
but um you know it's a little ridiculous If you slip on the ice, you're an ass.
But, you know, it's a little ridiculous.
I think Walsh is the mayor, too. Isn't that the mayor?
The mayor of Boston's name is Walsh.
Walsh said she called City Hall yesterday, spoke to a code enforcement director.
What is this?
Fucking Russia circa 19?
Steve Tankle, who told her all appeals need to be submitted in writing.
She probably can't do that either after shoveling with her arthritis.
Has knuckles like James Coburn.
And if you don't get that reference, look it up.
It was the last few years of his life when he was giving out like Oscar awards and shit.
He had these gnarled hands.
Walsh mailed it.
Imagine she had to write a letter explaining her situation.
Fucking Christ almighty.
Marty Walsh is the mayor.
He's not related to Lorraine.
Said code enforcement would review the appeal appropriately.
I'm sure they'll take into account all the circumstances around that the mayor said. I'm sure they'll take into account all the circumstances around that,
the mayor said.
I'm sure they will take into account.
You should hear that guy talk.
He makes Ted Kennedy sound like he's from Sweden or any Kennedy.
Pick one who's alive, dead, doesn't matter.
You get the point.
Anyhow, he says, I'm sure they'll take into account all the circumstances. Oh, I'm sure they will, too, after she gets that recording and shit.
Because, you know, the city government has been known to take people's personal, right, fucking stories and to take everything into a circumstance.
They're not just mindless robots.
Come on, Mayor Walsh.
She's an elderly person, so I want to make sure that we're not putting a burden on an elderly person that can't do it.
Well, you already are, just by making her write the letter and jumping through
fucking hoops with her 80-year-old knees.
Okay? Just tear it up. That would be
the right answer.
Anyhow.
Fucking government
up the fucking wazoo.
Ain't it?
Yeah.
Give the fucking broad a break, could you?
Just give the broad a break.
Marty Wald Mea of boston i'm telling you h you keep looking at me i'm gonna put you in the fucking ground i promise you not this time
well trump hysteria is you know it's just priceless i'll get to the press conference
which i was listening to on the way up to to Boston when he was bitch slapping the fucking media, which deserves to be dick slapped across the face for the next 40 years because they haven't changed their way since the election.
They're only getting worse.
They're hysteria.
And people are just blinded by.
Let me let me tell you, it's not just because it's Trump. They were blinded by let me let me tell you it's not just because it's trump they were
blinded by the hatred of bush remember bush derangement syndrome it's it's i thought that's
the worst it's even worse now under trump it is just priceless and the fucking media is in cahoots
the fucking propaganda arm of the democratic party which which is the mainstream media, has lost their tits.
And yes, Trump creates,
sometimes he's his own worst enemy.
I'll get to that in a few seconds
because he has to be a little more precise
with his language.
But, you know, we'll get to that.
But New York City, people are blinded.
Blinded.
Every day I pick up the paper,
here's one.
It was in the op- of the new york post
uh people that send their kids to a dalton school it's like a very rich uh school here in manhattan
um uh they usually have a party the dalton school at at um wallman rink it's a skating rink
that trump the city was trying to get it going for years, and Trump fixed it
in a matter of minutes years back.
And this school has a party,
skating party there every year.
But because, you know, Trump
has his name on it or has anything to do with it,
these fucking rich idiot
Upper East Side assholes, the parents
of these kids, don't want to fucking have
the party.
Ugh! Just fucking jerk-offs.
Aren't they?
Yeah, they are.
Why is everyone so fucking stupid?
Not everyone, just them.
Why aren't more people interrogating, like me?
Yeah, so I was reading some of the op-eds.
The time has come to stop with the childish acts and protests regarding President Trump.
Like him or hate him, he is the President of the United States. I with this uh steven rubinoff wrote in uh he's the president of the
u.s while i wholeheartedly support everyone's right to their opinion we should accept that
he's our president cut out with the antics like not allowing your children to have a school party
only because it it's at trump's woman rink can you imagine fucking dragging your kids into it? Yeah, let them be kids.
That's what they do.
They politicize everything.
And yeah, we should have went nuts after Obama got elected.
Imagine you'd be labeled a racist and shit.
The Dalton parent who said it was insane of the school to cancel a skating event at Trump's ice rink is totally correct.
This is another person who wrote it. Liberals are shooting themselves foot, or in this case, in the kids' skates.
How about putting a gun in their mouths? Out of insane hatred for Trump, the liberal government
bureaucracy that ran New York was not able to get the Wallman rink up and running. Trump did it in
record time, and it's been a blessing for New Yorkersers ever since how was all that lost on you before
you fucking tell your kids yeah we're not going to have that party this year because that evil
donald trump oh you're blinded by your ideology you're fucking really and again and don't accuse
me of that at trump because didn't even vote for him in the primaries listen to what he had had to
say and he fucking won me over okay especially with his hatred of
the media that was the other thing that put me over the top oh goodness great imagine though
fucking up your kids kids gonna have a school party they've been doing it year after year
no let's drive a kids into it fucking weasels oh my god and they were throwing rocks at his
motorcade down in florida this. Somebody threw a rock at it.
Imagine if that was done to fucking Obama.
They'd be banging on it.
They'd have the Secret Service.
They'd have the fucking CIA, the FBI banging on your door to find out who threw the rock.
And then you'd be charged with a hate crime and hung by your white European balls.
Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating a little bit.
But I think I am right on the money.
Who's an animal?
Your mother's an animal, you son of a bitch.
Oh.
Trump is the president.
Yeah.
Anyhow.
So Trump had that press conference
and he bitch slapped the media
and bitch slapped them
and bitch slapped them again
and bitch,
and I can't get enough of it.
It's not enough.
It is not enough.
And they are,
the mainstream media
is the enemy of the
american people he was so fucking dead on why do you say well didn't you learn anything from
watching cnn even just fucking the last six months before the election with donna brazil working with
cnn the dnc to get the questions for how fucking much more evidence do you need to know how corrupt
that's just the beginning you can go online online and find clips of CNN cutting people off when they're
interviewing people before the election and people start to say positive shit about Trump. They'll
cut them right the fuck off. Not to mention a thousand other stories that were Bailey stories.
And they are anti-Trump from morning, noon, and night. I switch around. I flip around. I watch as much as I can.
And it really is hilarious.
They wonder why their fucking ratings, as Archie Bunker would say, are in the turlet.
But they are.
They are.
Because they...
Ugh.
Let's listen to...
Don Lemon had a panel on last week.
And they were talking about how much it costs
to protect the first family.
You know, they always fucking do this story
no matter who's in office, right?
But of course, CNN has to pile on.
And there was a black guy who was a...
He worked for George W. Bush.
Don't even know what his title was.
But he had his opinion on CNN
talking about this very story.
And listen how that bitch Don Lemon, but he had his opinion on CNN talking about this very story.
And listen how that bitch Don Lemon, that big girl,
listen to how he handles it.
Remember he had a meltdown a few months ago on CNN,
yet he still works there.
I think he was drunk that night.
We'll cut him some slack.
But listen to Don Lemon and how he handles somebody who's trying to defend Trump.
That is a fake news story.
If you don't want to participate in the news stories on this network, then don't come on and participate.
But don't.
This guy said what they're talking about, you know, this very story about how much it costs to cover the first time is kind of fake news.
And Lemon just fucking lost his faggy tits.
Call them fake because
you don't agree with them go on Don this is a fake news story in my opinion
because the underlying assumption is that thanks everyone thanks for watching
have a great weekend good night all
What a dick.
Yeah, there's your fucking,
there's your neutral point of view on CNN,
and they do it all the fucking time.
How is Don Lemon still on the air? Why is Donna Brazile still being interviewed
after fucking, you know,
finding out what farces they
are in fakes and phonies and don lemon and cnn is exactly what the presidents say they are
they're fucking just hate around the clock towards trump
so trump uh yeah raised all kinds of news this weekend.
And well, first, let's get to Jonathan Karl.
Well, Trump said on Saturday, I think it was down in Florida and talking about, you know, terrorism.
And I think he was down in Melbourne. It was like one of his big rallies.
But here's what he had to say.
You look at what's happening in Germany.
You look at what's happening last night in Sweden.
Sweden.
Who would believe this?
He's talking.
And here's the thing.
Trump, again, this is where he's his own worst enemy.
Because you have to be a little more specific with your statements.
But I'm getting tired of this.
Oh, he lies about everything.
He lied about how many people at his inauguration.
He lied that he had the biggest electoral.
He gets his facts wrong as opposed to.
And then they.
But compared to Obama lying about you can, you know, you
can keep your healthcare plan and keep your doctor.
I know there was nobody going after conservatives from the IRA.
See those lies?
You're going to tell those, you're going to tell me those have the same weight, those
fucking lies.
But Trump brings the shit on himself.
Maybe he does it as a distraction while other shit is getting done.
But what he was talking about, I knew what he was talking about because I had seen the Tucker Carlson interview.
Tucker Carlson, a few nights prior, interviewed a guy who did a documentary
about Sweden and how it's been ruined societally almost
because of the refugees pouring into Sweden because they take everybody
and how rapes have gone up and and murders and and violence in general
because of the refugee problem and the guy making the fucking documentary almost get killed himself
making it but that's what so tucker did a you know uh interview with that guy a few nights prior and
and that that's what trump i knew what trump was referencing but he has to be and i agree he has
to be more particular with his language and more specific.
He tweeted the next day after he got all this blowback because people are going, they thought he was talking about terrorism.
He's comparing Germany and Brussels and what happened in Paris to nothing happened like that in Sweden.
So I can see where the confusion was.
But then another part of me is going, is this him doing one of those, you know, distraction, hey, look over here things?
But the fucking point being, the media just went fucking crazy.
And his point was legitimate.
What he was trying to drive home is, you know, what goes on, what's gone on in Europe over the last 50 years, by the way.
The refugee program didn't just
start and and so you know you're gonna make a we have to we can't be stupid over here you can't
look and that's what don lemon cnn and all the other fucking mainstream networks ignore the fact
that we already have proof that it's not working we have 50 years of proof that's a good sample
size in europe of the refugee crisis and what it's done and we just ignore it we have 50 years of proof that's a good sample size in europe of the refugee crisis
and what it's done and we just ignore it we have a politically correct fucking blinders on uh but
he has to be he has to be more careful with this fucking language no doubt about it unless he
enjoys this you know you have to be a little more particular. But you guys in the media who are fucking, he's not being presidential.
One jerk off stood up at some, I don't know, some, I think one of the Republican senators was having one of his town hall.
I forget where it was, but somebody, I feel like some guy stands up.
I feel like I'm in the back of a car and there's a drunk guy driving, meaning how Trump is handling his presidency.
And, oh, what a big puss.
And you can't try to keep covering him like he's a conventional president because he's not.
He's an outsider.
Okay?
It's so fun to hear progressives who are all for fucking change whining because this president doesn't represent the status quo when it comes to how politicians should behave and go about their business.
And it's progressives who love change who are shitting their pants.
I love it.
He's a fucking businessman.
He's a fucking Queens guy, a little rough around the edges, and they're all shitting their pants because he doesn doesn't him and ha and uh do that fake oh i'm so thoughtful like obama did hmm well uh takes 20 minutes to say
a sentence that he could have said in a fucking 30 seconds i'm intelligent and and then fucking
john mccain and he is a war hero and it's the one thing i hated when trump you know said uh
heroes don't
get caught whatever he said which that was fucking horrendous so I can't blame McCain for having a
b under his bonnet when it comes to Trump but when he goes when you look at history the first thing
dictators do is shut down the press Trump's not trying to shut down the fucking press he's just
trying to put some perspective on it because it's been so crooked for so long and so left-leaning and so in
the pocket of the democrat but nobody even argues that even the dems don't fucking argue that but so
mccain you know it's time to go man you've done enough god bless you you're a true american patriot
but you know step aside go enjoy your life, please. Please.
And of course, you have to quote like Defense Secretary Mad Dog Mattis saying, I have no problem with the press. He has to say that. What's he going to fucking say?
But Jonathan Karl, you know, on this week with, you know, the midget showorge stephanopoulos he fills in for george and
he said he at the end of this sunday um on abc you know this week he said as long as america's
democracy remains healthy there will be reporters willing to pursue the truth even if that means
incurring the wrath of the most powerful person in the world and he said i've seen my colleagues
risk their lives and with increasing frequency lose their lives in their pursuit of the truth
notice you haven't uh and a closing essay that noted that uh historically contentious
relations between white house and the press yeah exactly so put it in perspective like trump's the
first one to hate the press goes back to thomas jefferson and the whole slew of them okay
uh and they you know they always defend a free you need a free press to make the democracy yes
a free press but not a free uh corrupt press and that's what you guys because you have a lower
rating than the fucking morons in congress how do you fucking explain that okay it's been slanted so far to the left for so many years
that uh the average american joe out i hated cnn when i was 22 before i was following politics
i just fucking it smelled of pc horseshit
so i'm glad trump is bitch slapping him but again he has to be a little more particular
with his language unless unless he wants to keep getting in these scrapes i don't fucking know
um but uh mccain saying that you know it's the first thing dictators do is shut down the press
how is he trying to shut down the press give me an example senator m McCain. Well, he said something about libel suits.
Yeah, yeah, that hasn't happened either.
But McCain did say, I'm not saying the president's trying to be a dictator.
I'm just saying we need to learn the lessons of history.
Yes, yes.
And you need to learn the lessons that fucking press corps has become corrupt.
Especially this one.
It needs to be douched.
Talk about draining the swamp.
Like I said.
Fucking love Don Lemon.
Okay, we gotta go.
I disagree.
Anyhow, kids.
Again, go to connectpal.com slash Nick
if you're enjoying this show
to sign up for two to
three more shows a week a lot of people are doing it a lot of people are doing it sound like trump
a lot of people are doing it you'll enjoy i guarantee your head will spin it so funny um
bill maher responds to real time this all all happened last week before I had to go to Boston,
but I still wanted to cover it because it's right up my poop chute.
No pun intended here.
Bill Maher responds to real-time protesting journalists,
and he says liberals will continue to lose elections.
This guy who Bill Maher has on his show on a regular basis,
Jeremy Scahill.
I don't know if that's pronounced properly, but who gives a shit?
He's a big girl, apparently, because Big Lib, who's a regular on the show. But he found out that Bill was going to have Milo on, Yiannopoulos, you know, the outspoken, provocative, conservative gay fella.
And Jeremy, you know, canceled his appearance.
conservative gay fella uh and jeremy you know canceled his appearance he thinks it's just again you know it's wrong to let bill maher you know have somebody like milo on a right-wing flamethrower
and that um this guy says uh milo's booking would be exploited by the breitbart news editor in
attempt to legitimize his hateful agenda. You don't get to defend that.
You don't get to fucking define what's hateful and what's not.
And that's Bill Maher's point
to the fucking point.
The guy fucking canceled, naturally.
So Milo came on.
And at least Bill Maher's
starting to see the light.
You know?
Actually, Bill Maher fired back after the that guest had canceled um that scahill guy canceled and uh this another complaint by mr scahill uh was that uh bill maher's
uh you know his take on islam uh was veering into vitriol.
And Bill Maher said, well, basically, the guy's full of shit.
And he said, Bill Maher said,
my comments on Islam have never veered into vitriol.
Liberals will continue to lose elections
as long as they follow the example of people like Mr. Scahu,
whose views veer into fantasy
and away from bedrock liberal principles like equality of
women. Yeah, well, again, that's the feminist movement, and they're behind a lot of the
censorship in this country and the PC-ness, and they never come out against Islam, hardly ever,
even though there's the most misogynist religion on the face of the earth. But Bill says, like
principles of equality of women, respect for bill says like principles equality of women respect
for minorities and i kind of disagree with that you respect them so you can get their votes
separation religion and state and free speech which the left is totally and liberals are totally
not behind anymore uh witness the burning of berkeley and milo's speech being canceled there
so um you know, but Bill says,
if Mr. Yiannopoulos is indeed the monster Scahill claims,
and he might be,
nothing could serve the liberal cause
better than having him exposed on Friday night.
Exactly fucking right.
Right?
Right.
So let's play a little Milo.
And this clip with Bill Maher, he's talking about the importance of humor and i've been saying this for a year everybody thinks music is what was
going to bring the world together i think it's humor and i've said this in interviews
or maybe i said it to my wife when i was fighting with her and she said why are you still doing
comedy no um she would never say that she loves my comedy she bought me a squirting
flower for my birthday no um but i've always been saying this since tough crowd because comedy really
is a way to break down the tension you know i mean chris rock can make me laugh a lot and i disagree
them same with bill hicks disagree about 90 of their political views and view on life but uh
bill hicks i learned so much from about the left
listening to his cds and shit and music can bring people together only so much because we don't all
play an instrument but we all have a sense of humor and we have diffused situations and
conversations that get too tense with a joke right a lot of comics uh not me included here but a
little nerds that used to get beat up and shit.
Or Chris Rock used to say he'd get threatened because he was real small.
You know, bullies would try to bully him and he'd save his own ass with his sense of humor.
And they'd actually become friends.
That's what it does.
You can do that with music too.
But I think comedy is more of actually a universal language.
Because we've all made somebody laugh in our lives at one point.
And it can save your ass or it can get your teeth knocked in.
I like to walk that fence.
It's not a popularity contest.
That's what I loved about Kinison.
He goes, you don't have to fucking like me to find me funny, which most people who have my political views, they practice that.
I can laugh at Al Frank and I think he's a funny fuck because he's so hateful.
And I can laugh at Andy Kindler, who's a fucking left winger.
And even Jon Stewart in The Daily Show.
But you don't find that on the left.
You don't find that in the people who go to Bill Maher's live tapings.
Most of them, they're just fucking blind.
But here's Milo making that point on the Bill Maher show.
He's a handsome fella, gay fella, who has a black, or he had a black Muslim boy.
He likes black guys.
So it's very hard.
You'll notice the live audiences who love to attack conservatives on Bill Maher's show,
you know, they were having trouble fucking hissing
and booing because this guy, again, puts black penises in his mouth. And apparently that buys
you capital with the far left audience. But here's Milo, who's very intelligent and funny. And I like
everything about him except the fucking pearls. It looks like he busted into Barbara Bush's bedroom.
Not just that. But the other thing is, you know, humor isn't how you drive
people apart. You know, these sort of
policing humor for racism and sexism
is utterly wrong-headed. Not just because
normally it isn't there, but because that's how
we build bridges, not how we break them.
You know, when you make a joke,
that's how you connect with somebody.
You know, you make jokes at the bar, you have awkward small talk.
Humor's what brings people together,
not what drives them apart. And these basic, you know, fundamental human psychological insights, the progressive...
I mean, the one area where I'm a little concerned is when you go after people individually.
Yeah, you've never done that, Bill.
If it's in the cause of a greater truth, you know, if people are hurt as, you know, collateral damage, I'll go there.
But, like, I didn't understand't understand like the ghostbusters thing
first of all who gives a fuck i wrote a bad review of a movie am i not entitled to do that i said she
looked like a dude she does um you know i said right so she was barely literate she is and i
simply don't accept i do not accept that a hollywood you know that the star of a hollywood
blockbuster that an a-list mega celebrity is sitting in a hollywood mansion crying over mean
words on the internet. Get over it.
And if you aren't over it, which I suspect you are,
because it's not really the case that she's sitting there upset about mean words on the Internet.
Actually, she's been deployed by the studio because the movie's tanking.
You know, you've just got to accept.
I'm sorry.
You've just got to accept mean words on the Internet don't hurt anyone.
Exactly. We have to get over this notion if you make a gay joke that means eight gay guys are going to get beat up tonight
or transgender that mentality's been driven so far into people's heads thanks to the left-leaning
mainstream fucking media for the last 50 years they tell lies and they tell them for 50 fucking
years and they become the truth like how
racist and hateful this country is it's a crock of fucking shit and he's right on the money about
humor and shit and uh it's just refreshing but if i want you to picture like ann colt is saying
just what he just said or any other fucking white conservative they would have been getting hissed
and booed and whatever,
but because this guy, again, is gay and has black boyfriends
and blah, blah, blah, that's the same with my friend Lisa Lampanelli.
She gets away with the most racist, heinous shit
because half her act is talking about how many fucking black guys
she loves to fuck.
And I'm not going to blow a black fella, so my jokes work.
That's where I draw the line.
I might take one out to eat, you know, red lobster on a Thursday night.
They love that shit.
And, oh, that's racist.
Oh, it's a joke.
But, yeah, I learned all that on Tough Crowd, you know.
And me and Patrice going back and forth and laughing together.
And even Paul Mooney, this black comic who hates fucking white people.
He says that in his act.
And I always hated him from a distance.
But we made each other laugh in the green room and on the panel of Tough Crowd.
And it really does.
It's a good elixir if you don't have booze to break the fucking tension.
And it really can go, you know.
And I agree with him.
He got all blamed for that Leslie.
What's her name? What's Rod's name that he's just talking about leslie jones i don't know but you know
what she does stink on snl she flubs her fucking lines that doesn't mean you hate her or anything
but but if you state that you become a racist and that's where we are and all that stuff
and i could have found if i met leslie is it leslie jones i'm probably fucking the name up but i would like her you know uh but we have to get over this fucking uh you
know anyhow and then he went on uh that's when he was talking about humor he's dead on and and
larry wilmore the most boring negro on the planet if i can say that uh larry willmore nice guy did his show
um but just just you know a failed talk show host on comedy central but we have to listen to his
word like it's the bible because um he's well spoken and And but but this is how he responds to Milo after Milo, you know, made some great arguments against his fucking blind ideology.
But this is how liberals respond when they come up against a conservative as smart as them.
See, do you always have to fight with everybody?
I don't.
We were having such a nice time, but you always invite such awful people on your show.
They're so stupid.
No, come on.
You need to start inviting higher IQ guests, or this is going to be a disaster.
First of all, wait.
These are very high.
Wait, hold on, Bill.
You can go fuck yourself, all right?
Oh, good response.
Now the sheep join in.
Hold on a second.
No, no, no, Gary.
And I'll let you go, Jack.
If your argument is that these people are stupid,
you didn't hear a word this man said early in this segment
because he can talk circles around you.
Oh, cue the politically correct speech.
Because he can talk circles around you,
so he's a better talker than Milo.
But was there any logic or reasoning?
Oh, goodness.
Pathetic, douchey little ass
for Milo.
Pathetic, douchey little
ass.
One last thing, and I'll let you defend.
I'll let you defend it.
Leslie Jones is not very
literate. Go fuck yourself again for that one.
Yes, she is.
Yes, she is.
Excuse me. She can barely spell. I very funny. No, no, no. Excuse me.
Excuse me.
She can barely spell.
Larry, I'm a great fan of yours, man.
I love it.
She can barely spell.
That was Milo's comeback.
Excuse me.
And then there's a white congressman on there,
the guy that had the problem with the bathroom issue in Carolina,
Jack Kingston, whatever his name is
bill has him on a lot but that's him at the end chiming in we are all about the first amendment
here and my love go for it brother because i think what they did to you at berkeley was
you hear that so he goes there's a white congressman defending mile he said go for
it brother freedom of speech there's where there should be a round of applause from the Bill Maher audience.
But no, it came out of a fucking conservative congressman's mouth and nothing.
So they just can't help themselves.
And like I said, I will laugh at Al Franken, Andy Kindler, whoever, even Bill Maher.
I mean, but they won't laugh at people.
And, you know, they laughed a little bit at Milo, only because, like I said,
a very gay fellow who's very conservative and whatever.
Well, he probably wouldn't call himself conservative.
It really gets, the waters get muddied, don't they?
But Larry Wilmore, fuck you and go fuck yourself again for making good points.
Fuck you and I can't undermine because Milo walks the walk.
He got in more hot water too, I guess, this week.
Because he's going to speak.
He's going to be a conference speaker at CPAC.
American conservatives have expressed anger at the booking of right-wing provocateur Milo Yiannopoulos
as a conference speaker after footage emerged in which he discussed sex between younger boys and older men.
An internet live stream,
Unopolis, yeah, we know he's the news editor of Breitbart.
They have to stick that in there.
They have to fucking...
Says you can get...
He's quoting Milo saying you can get quite hung up
on this child abuse thing.
He goes on to suggest that sex between younger boys
and older men could be a coming-of- age relationship in which those older men help those younger boys
discover who they are.
He also details relationship he had with a Catholic priest when he was a
teenager,
which makes me go,
wow,
I'd like to get more on that.
Um,
but,
uh,
somebody put it up on Facebook and, uh, trying to tie him, you know,
trying to say that he is encouraging and supporting pedophilia,
which of course he says he isn't.
And Milo says the video had been select selectively edited.
He said,
I did say that there are relationships between younger men and older men that
can help a young gay man escape from a lack of support or understanding at
home. That's perfectly true. and every gay man knows it.
But I was not talking, first of all, does every gay man know that?
I don't know if that statement is, but I was not talking about anything illegal, and I
was not referring to prepubescent boys.
I was talking about my own relationship when I was 17 with a man who was 29.
The age of consent in the UK is 16.
was 29 the age of consent in the uk is 16 so but if that gets turned into him again you know somehow promoting or defending pedophilia and uh you know and he says bullshit the thing was edited
uh so you watch it and believe what you want if i can believe um so but conservatives are upset you know um because he's speaking at this cpac
uh matt schlapp the head of american conservative union which bills itself as the nation's premier
conservative voice and arranges the cpac conference had defended concerns about booking
to speak uh before the video emerged however conservatives use conservatives used Twitter to denounce Yiannopoulos,
not just for the comments he made in the video,
but also his history
of the matter.
The media, professors,
and the entertainment industry.
Anyhow.
Yeah, the CP it has attracted controversy for its efforts to woo social conservatives
and prohibit conservatives with more progressive views on lgbt rights
because back in 2015 they excluded the log cabin republicans which is a pro-lgbt group
um so um you know it's a controversial booking to say the least
but uh by booking him it looks like you know they're widening their horizons to me
and uh i i you know i don't think he's defending pedophilia you know you got to put these things into a context
but he was very funny on bill maher bill maher seemed to like him and uh thumbs up for bill
maher putting him on and and actually being fair he he told him to shut the fuck up a couple times
milo really is got that at like add he's all over the place but uh i mean come on
it was fucking great it was just great to see larry wilmore people like that who just blinded
by their horseshit left-wing ideology fucking uh fuck you fuck you milo for having good answers and
fuck you any fucking how let's lighten it up by the way hitler's phone went on uh auction
uh yeah the auction hitler's phone today every time i see a story like that i text louis ck
because he always had hitler material when we were younger and i remember unlucky louis Remember on Lucky Louie, one of the episodes, he buys a Hitler doll.
No.
Wait a minute.
What the fuck was it?
Was it a Richard Nixon doll?
I can't remember.
Now I'm fucking the story up.
I think it was a Hitler doll.
And they wouldn't even.
And they substituted.
They made it a Richard Nixon doll or vice versa i don't
know but it was hbo fucking really showing their left leanings but uh yeah a phone used by adolf
hitler sold at auction for almost a quarter million dollars made by siemens this is the phone
that was used by hitler to issue most of his commands during the last two years of world war
two too bad it wasn't they didn't have mobile phones back then because the connection is dog that was used by Hitler to issue most of his commands during the last two years of World War II.
Too bad it wasn't,
they didn't have mobile phones
back then
because the connection is dog shit.
We could have saved a lot of people.
When I wanted them executed
at Auschwitz,
I'm sorry, my Fuhrer,
you're breaking up.
The Friends and Fuhrer Program.
Apparently it was left in a box inside an english country house um you know hitler's bunker they found in hitler's bunker
so it's been sitting in this guy's house in england for ever
the auction house describes hitler's mobile device of destruction called it arguably the
most destructive weapon of all time.
I would say Obama's phone and his pen, too, would be the most destructive weapon with all those fucking executive orders, which sent millions to their deaths around the world.
Imagine, why do you want Hitler's phone on your fucking...
I don't...
Although I do have a Mussolini's walkie-talkies.
I got those.
A replica.
And I have a...
That's true.
I have a cigarette lighter that's Stalin.
Anyhow,
$243,000.
I wish I had that kind of
Dota-Buy shit like that.
Not that. Not like Hitler shit, but...
You know what I mean.
Do you know?
Who's an animal?
Your mother's an animal, you son of a bitch!
Anyhow.
Finally, as I was watching a little Rogan and Steven Crowder go back and forth,
which was making me really uncomfortable,
which makes for great entertainment, by the way um because i like both those guys and uh i guess joe actually put out a statement
kind of like apologizing um because joe argues like me and um but i was laughing so fucking hard
that they were debating about pot you know it was all they got into it about pot and you know
whether it causes car accidents and statistics and you know joe's a pro pot guy and and it was just fucking he's
he's smoking fucking balls as they have in the argument oh my god i was belly laughing it was
fucking great and that podcast is such a juggernaut i can't tell you how many people came up to me
in boston going uh yeah i heard you on Rogan. Part of me
was happy. Another part of me was like, fuck, I thought I sold this place out myself. Was it all
Rogan's juice? If it is, I'm flying out there every other month to do it. And, uh, I'll bring
him a big bag of weed or something. Uh, I told my stories about, I told you guys my stories about weed. It's like doing LSD for me.
I can't handle any of that shit,
but,
but I was,
as I was stumbling through that,
I was looking at some of Joe's other interviews and I found one from a
couple of years ago.
He did with Leno,
Jay Leno talking about mob stories.
When,
when the show biz was run by the mob and Jay is the best storyteller.
It's what makes them so fucking great.
And I always love when,
and this was when I missed one story that Jay had told about them.
I think I had missed this one.
I'd never heard it before,
but,
but listen to this funny story.
Jay tells about one of the clubs he was working at that the mob was running.
It's like a benefit for a church or something,
but here we go.
So we're doing this thing.
It's at a golf course. And they say to me, listen, there's a priest for a church or something. But here we go. So we're doing this thing. It's at a golf course.
And they say to me, listen, there's a priest here.
So keep your act clean.
I said, yeah, okay, fine.
So I go up and I do my little act.
Fine, thank you.
Applause, applause.
I sit down.
So this gangster guy gets up.
He goes, I want to welcome you all to this place.
And what was I going to say? Oh, this place, and what's I going to say?
Oh, shit, I forgot what I was going to say.
And when he said shit, the priest went like this.
That guy goes, what?
Hey, father! You got your
ten grand in the fucking bag? Shut the
fuck up! He just goes crazy
in his gut. You shut the fuck up!
And the place is just,
everybody's just frozen with fear.
This guy is just like crazy.
And the priest is like, he's holding his bag
with the 10 grand in it, you know. And then he sits down.
Whoa.
So I'm sitting there and the guy goes, hey, Jake, come here.
He goes, let me ask you something.
You know Stallone, right? I said, well, I don't know him.
Rocky had just come out. This is 1976.
I said, I don't know him.
I mean, I met him. You know, we asked him to do this dinner, this benefit today. And he said is 1976. I said, I don't know him. I mean, I met him.
You know, we asked him to do this dinner, this benefit today.
And he said, no.
He said, no.
And I said, well, I mean, maybe he was busy.
He wasn't busy!
And he starts screaming at me.
I go, you're right.
I'm sure.
I'm fine.
He goes, come on, let's play some golf.
I said, I don't really play golf.
You play golf!
All right, I'll play golf.
I'll play golf.
So now we're in golf carts.
And we're in this golf cart.
And we drive out to about the 12th hole.
And we get to the 12th hole.
And there are these kind of 50, 60-year-old prostitutes, topless, with leopard-skin print miniskirts, handing out drinks.
It was like the craziest day of my life. But this guy
was like a true psycho
criminal. I mean, just one of those guys
like a scene from Goodfellas. They just kill you.
You know, I always love movies where
somebody threatens someone and they go, you're not going to kill me, Bob.
Because I know you're not the kind of guy.
No, no, they will kill you.
They will kill you. And it just really
made me laugh.
Is that guy...
The priest coughs
you got your fucking 10 uh i you know i caught i only had experience with that once
uh new haven i was doing a club it was raining that night i get there i'm closing the show the
show's at eight i get there at like 8 20 or 8 15 you know
i mean the fucking feature act hasn't even gone up yet and the the owner was a guy a little
known to have a few friends or whatever and uh of a certain descent and uh anyhow i go up and do my
shit and then uh he hands me the envelope at the end. He goes, it's 50 light because you are late.
Just the way he said it, I didn't even argue on it.
That's okay.
And I wasn't late.
I was fucking there a half hour before I was going on stage.
But at that same club, I went in and it was like, I told you, his mom was snorting coke
with the state trooper in the men's room but i did not say anything i i
gladly took my envelope that was 50 light and um was on my way and then that club in boston uh was
run by some fellas let's say when i was first coming up and uh i always stayed clear of the
owner who made the hair stand up on my nuts.
But Jay has a million stories like that.
It cracks me up.
Anyways, kids, again, if you want to subscribe to the Nick DiPaolo podcast, go to connectpal.com slash Nick.
Connectpal.com slash Nick.
Come see me this weekend at Magoobie's Joke House.
Sounds funny.
Sounds like a bad room, but it's actually an A room.
Guy Andrews done a great job with his club.
We all play it.
It's outside of Timonium, Maryland.
And I'll be there this Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.
And then March 4th, I'll be at the Westport Inn in Westport, Connecticut.
It's a treehouse comedy series.
And then March 9th uh march 9 10 and 11
side splitters in tampa one of my favorites and hot comedy club and yonkers on the 24th of march
25th the co-host music hall in uh upstate new york i want to say albany co-host that's the name of
the town isn't it sure it is uh then acme comedy club my favorite club in the nation uh march 30
31 and april 1 the great lewis lee runs that and i love it juniors comedy in erie pennsylvania
april 13 14 and 50 governors april 21 and 22 go to nickdip.com for all those dates. Again, if you want to advertise on the show, go to contactnickdipatyahoo.com.
And, yeah, we'll talk about rates and whatnot.
Again, thanks for coming out to Boston, those of you who did.
Thank you, subscribers and people listening today on iTunes.
Had a great time, and I'll talk to you real soon.
Hey, hey, I saved the world today
And everybody's happy now
The bad things gone away Bad things gone away I'm not like that!
I'm not like that!
I'm not like that!
I'm not like that!
I'm not like that!
Please let it stay
Hey, hey, I saved the world today
I'm not like that!
I'm not like that! I'm not like that! I saved the world today And everybody's happy now guitar solo I'm out.