The Nick DiPaolo Show - 193- Bennington &The Philly Flash Mob

Episode Date: July 18, 2017

Bennington &The Philly Flash Mob

You're listening to Nick DiPaolo on the Riotcast Network, Riotcast.com. Hello, folks. Welcome to the show. I'm Nick DiPolo, your white, straight, male host. Leader of the deplorables, of the eridemals. The whole world hates us, Andy. Every article. Every article you pick up. It's all about white, heterosexual males and our privilege and shit. So privileged.

We'll both be working in the city making $60 combined between two of us. What's going on, folks? Remember, a week from tomorrow, I'll be at the fat black pussycat is that allowed a white straight male with the fat black pussycat uh which is the comedy cellar room around the corner it's killer it's july 25th come down and see me it's a week from tomorrow night uh i'll be working out an hour and uh listen to this show, The Overnights, at 2 a.m. Eastern, 11 p.m. in the West. Obviously, you can hear it on demand at any time.

And live show updates at DePaulo Show, SXM. Hit me up on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, at Nick DePaulo. And thank you to a contributor to my podcast, James Scherer.

Sent more money. Hell of a fellow, James. If you want to subscribe to the podcast go to connectpal.com slash nick you get the free show on monday which is also on itunes and riotcast and many other places and then you get four more shows for 3.99 a month based on uh this show and uh please do it. I need the cash. Let's be honest. Before I forget, happy birthday to my mom. Joan DiPaolo, 80 years young today.

80. She's in good shape. I timed her on the 40. 4.840 she ran. That was a year ago. She's a few pounds heavier now. But I'm telling you. My mother's tough as nails. she ran. That was a year ago. She's a few pounds heavier now. I'm telling you.

My mother's tough as nails. She's like a good looking Olivia Soprano as far as mentality wise. They play these games. I never really saw eye to eye with mommy. I'm more close to my dad. Which is odd because he hit me more. But like I said, I had to come come but my mother's 80 years old she doesn't look a day Sarah she looks like she's 60 and I

think she's gonna be the ones that goes into the high 90s maybe early hundreds you know what mine is still clear and and uh never sits down never sits down What do you call those watches of Fitbits? You got to strap one on her. She just set a world record, I'm telling you. But, you know, that's because of the Coke problem. But that's neither here nor there. But happy birthday, Joni DiPaolo. Love you. What did I want to get off my chest real quick?

Well, how about a fat lady doing her nails? I'm in the left lane once again i'm behind this car and there's there's 10 cars behind me we're all doing about 40 miles an hour i am fuming i finally get up to the right of this bro fat lady putting her fucking nails holy shit ron bennington and gail are looking in the window you did it for about 30 seconds Oh for Christ's sake Um

I hope they're not listening I don't want a pro watching me He looks like the He looks like the capo Doesn't he? Some Philly capo What was I talking about? Oh the fat lady

So I get up next up next she's putting nail polish on in the left lane of a fucking highway she had both hands up on the thing and she was can you make that up jesus christ fat ugly and dumb you know yeah sure sure let's get him in here ronnie bennington i don't know why he's still in the building um but uh Yeah, sure. Sure. Let's get him in here. Ronnie Bennington. I don't know why he's still in the building, but we're going to try to get him in here. Yeah? He's wandering around.

Both my producers leave the room. Mr. Bennington's entering the building. Ron, do you mind if i sit in this chair you know what this is your chair i understand i'll stand up you look like you should have been doing this your whole life instead of wasting your time with stand-up comedy begging drunks for laughs i looked at or i sounded i'd rather have you say i sound yeah you sound it yeah do you hear that folks you haters out there. That was Ron Bennington, who everybody, everybody agrees is a radio aficionado. So you people on Twitter, you can lick my left nut.

You know what I'm upset about? I thought you were going to Montreal. No, I wanted to stay here. Is that right? I really did. I'm just tired. I've done that festival a hundred times. No offense.

I don't want to be in a hotel for four or five days, do a couple meaningless sets and interview comedians. I don't give a fuck about it. That's how it's summed it up. You must be getting a hell of a lot of money because the bluntness that you have with going to Montreal is pretty great. I'm not getting that much money. What, here?

Yeah. You know how it works. No, I'm doing alright Yeah nice Again but we live in New York So you know what I mean You cut it in half Yeah you do cut it in half

I'd be doing well If I was in Albany If you were in Albany You'd be the big guy You'd probably end up Owning the car business up there But are you enjoying Doing this radio?

I love doing this Yeah And I love this studio And I do I absolutely The hours are perfect I love this studio, and I do. I absolutely... The hours are perfect. I come in in the middle of the afternoon, right? So there's no traffic, so to speak, of

everything's relative, but... And then I leave here. There's no traffic. And you can't say that, coming from Westchester, that often. Well, you know, here's the thing. Sure. Everything ran well here for years opie's had a solid job for i think 15 straight years yeah and then nick dipalo joins and the whole apple cart is turned over no wait a minute now you're just trying to stir up some shit

no that's what he got in trouble for but what i'm saying is this oh i didn't know that story oh you just heard about it i just heard about it yeah i don't know anything me either but it feels weird right it uh now what's what's your plan are you looking for that slot are you going to move the mornings and push jimmy afternoons i i just what did i just do i just told you how much i loved these hours because of the traffic i base my life around traffic. And I'm perfectly happy where I'm at. But, you know, I mean, if somebody goes, hey, we'll kick it up a few notches money-wise.

I'll take a look at it. I'm not fucking retarded over here. But there's like a Shakespearean who's in the shadows. You smoke cocksucker. Fuck you. And right away, as soon as I heard anything, I go, DiPaolo's behind this. This is pure DePaulo. First of all, I take that as a compliment because I don't have that kind of savvy.

If I had those street skills, I wouldn't be telling jokes in radio. I'd be out on the streets selling dope to kids like I should be and my relatives. You know what I mean? I don't have that street savvy. When I worked at Chris Rock HBO, I marveled at these people who had office politics down to a... Right. They played people against each other and just passive aggressive. I don't have that in me.

You know, I wear my... My... You what? My mustard on my sleeve. Whatever the fuck. You wear your my emotions. Yeah. Right?

What was the big show? Because I don't want to bother you. I'm just running around saying I'll be in Montreal doing Comedy 101, which I've asked you time and time. This would have been the third time. You never asked me to do anything in Montreal. Yes, yeah. Did you, Ollie? My guy Chris has asked you twice.

I think Chris might be lying to you. So you never remember being asked. Both times you were working. This is a show that we do yeah we go out and it's open micers and we just let the the comics tear them to shreds it's basically yeah and i was working yeah and then that we're like this time we're like holy shit bobby's gonna be there norton's gonna be there tap's going to be there this is the perfect lineup yeah you're out bobby tells me i don't know i'm not staying i got it you know he started smoking cigars and

that's all he can think about now he looks is he does he keep him in the back of his neck in those falls it looks like he's got six cigars on the back it's just cruel it's cruel but true i know that's why i needed you at this show but you don't want to be in montreal i don't like being mean to people yeah i i'm you know the roast i got tired of uh those comedy central things were fun but then it's the same guys and some of them are your friends on the dais so you start cutting deeper yeah i was never comfortable with that yeah i i don't I'm actually not a fan of roast either. This is just picking on open mic comics.

It's just... Oh, I don't want to crush their dreams. Yes, that's what it is. Take a fucking dream and stamp on it. It's beautiful. Did you come up with that premise? Yes. Yeah, it sounds like...

By the way, Ron goes on, you know, at the stand a few times months ago. He comes in there. I didn't even know he was still doing... I'm not. He goes on right after me, though, and doesn't miss a beat. I'm like, he's going to take it in the face here. Watch this. First, he throws a few zings at me as I'm leaving the stand,

and that's how he endears the audience to himself. But like a true pro, a true, you know. I just went after his set. Watch, Nick is going to mingle now because he went in and tore into the paying customers. And I'm old school. I don't believe that. I'm like, the customer is the most valued thing that we have. Yeah, but there's one thing you're missing.

What's that? Today's customers, half of them don't pay to get in. So I'm going to open their fucking holes. Good point. I stopped in this weekend and a guy, well, I'll say this. You know, you go in for a nice night. Rich Voss, he goes on stage. He sits down now.

You know, he just turned 60. So he's just trying to ease into life and he's just telling some stories and he's nice. And then a guy goes, that's the funniest joke you've told yet. that's the funniest joke you've told yet and vos turns on this guy and beats him until he's just just powdered and goo on the ground all 60 years worth of angst and bitterness just unloaded yeah he literally yelled at the guy i'm a loaded gun and it was so fucking funny and so great to see i'm a loaded gun a squirt gun because when i talk i spit yeah you'd be but let me tell you boss is as vicious as anybody yeah and funny when you're sitting around the table busting balls yeah he's as good as anybody it's it's in he's got that

comedy dna and and he's yeah you don't want to get into a pissing match with Voss. Or his wife. Yeah, or his wife. Or his wife. They both come at you like fucking like razors in their hands just slicing you up. And they get a kid like that now too. Their kid is really funny and cruel. How old? I don't know how old she is.

I can't tell what kids are. That's how I got in trouble. Well, did it have a bikini on or fucking a mini skirt or a pair of pajamas? I don't know. Like eight, nine? Yeah, I think eight or nine. Something like that. It's a girl you're talking about.

Yeah, it's a little girl. Yeah. I hope she looks like Bonnie. She looks like Bonnie at a stand-in. Is that right? Yes. Like exactly like Bonnie. Oh, wow.

Bonnie's cute. Yeah, she is. I say that out of due respect. I'm rich. Yes. We picked that up. Out of due respect. So what were you working on today before? I don't want to come in and bother you.

You've got a great show. I've got to be honest with you. I'm glad you wandered by because it was one of those days. Right. I didn't have much to open. You know what I mean? Well, I just did a show with Tim and Eric. And you know who they are, right?

Yeah, Tim Kaine and Eric. Yes, it's Tim Kaine. Come on, you can do it. I don't know. Who's Tim and Eric? Tim and Eric is a very big show. Radio show? No, a TV show for years.

They're on the Adult Swim. They're for the millennials. Why would you think I know? I'm in my late 70s because you keep your i watch adult diapers good evening thing you got your ear to the ground like an old indian all right now is that a native american indian or one who just got here to fix my the tv no native american i i don't use it that way. What were you working on here? I haven't got to anything yet.

It was in my opening. It said, happy birthday to my mom. She'll be 106 today. And my first thing I wanted, if I hear one more Major League Baseball announcer use the word scuffling instead of struggling, I am going to fucking lose my shit. They say they scuffle when they're in trouble? You guys are going to notice this from here on in. Yeah. Harold Reynolds started it by accident, I think.

Scuffling. Nobody says struggling anymore. Nobody. You can mark that down. I've been saying this for two years. Then I'm watching Sox Yankees. They said scuffling like four times. Drive you crazy?

It makes me, because I think. Scuffling should happen to shoes. You scuffle your shoes. Not that you don't struggle. Scuffling is a fight shoes. You scuffle your shoes. You don't struggle. Scuffling is a fight, if you look it up. It's actually a fight. So when the pitcher is 0-11 in June, he's not scuffling. He sucks.

But scuffling, they all do it. I don't know if ESPN made a rule. Not just ESPN. Fox, when I watch baseball on Fox, they say scuffling. Somebody please. It's a little thing, but it's one of those things, once it gets in your head, and you'll never forget this. I am going to watch it for

now on. I've never picked up on it, though. Well, by the time someone starts struggling, I just click out. You know what I mean? I'm not going to watch nine innings unless you can pull together something that can interest me. Yeah. So, yeah, it's scuffling.

Can you watch baseball the same way as you could when you were younger or has the ADD of the modern world got to you more? That's a complicated answer on some level. As a young kid, are you assuming that I couldn't? I didn't have the attention to me when I was younger? No, I felt like when you're younger, yes, you could watch it easily. It was baseball. It was on TV, on the radio.

It was comfortable. Yes, I agree with that. But now it's like you find yourself. I've ruined it with the DVR. I don't watch anything in real time now. And when I do, oh my God, it's hard. Well, here's the thing. I have trouble DVvr in sports right

because then you're like an idiot cheering for something that already happened you know i mean like you're like oh come on they can pull this out when everyone else in the world knows no they didn't i don't have a problem as long as i don't know yeah i never forget i'm working at stitches comedy club as a barback in boston before i even became a comedian. Villanova. Remember? Sure. Villanova, that big game in the 80s. Villanova and was it Jim Bell? Yeah. Yeah. The whole night, I'm recording it on a VCR to give you how, you know, this is back in

the 80s. And the whole night, somehow I got through without hearing the results. And I'm getting out of work at like quarter to two in the morning. I'm walking to my car. Don't know the result. So excited. I'm going to stay up all night and watch this. I hear somebody down the street.

Hey, Villanova! It just, it's still fun. It's one of the great upsets of all time. All night I avoid it. And that's hard to do in Boston, as far as sports goes. But baseball, to answer your question, I have to record it and fast forward.

I can watch it at the park pretty easily watching it on tv watching it on tv is more of a struggle than it used to be because i don't know i'm just sitting around i'm wondering if i'm fucking missing trump has done something you know what i mean you flip around yeah you start to flip around. Like, I literally will think, is something broken with the Trump case? Trump is like my OJ, where I just don't know whether I'm cheering for him, like for the anti-hero or against him. I do the same. I flip around the CNN, MSNBC to see, just see the chyron. Oh, it's unbelievable.

Say Russian collusion. Yeah. They are relentless. Yeah. 11 babies were killed on a highway in New York. It's National News, but you put it on MSNBC. Kushner today

met with the, it's priceless to me. They will ignore anything to hang this guy. I love that fat dude that was with them, though, the guy who they said

hooked it up. Bob Goldstone? Yeah, he's the old rock and roll guy. And they were saying that like years ago, remember that we are the world shit when they raised all the money for Ethiopia?

He was in charge of dropping off stuff there and he was in Ethiopia for a while and he gained seven pounds. Who? In Ethiopia. Fucking Goldstone. And they actually said- You're not confusing him with- Whoever the fat guy is that put this thing together, the English guy.

But you said we are the world no no he worked for that no he worked oh he did oh he did that's how long he's been around and he put on seven he put on seven pounds and geldof is like what are you doing dude and he goes hey it's fucking ethiopia there's nothing to do but eat there it's so boring they don't have anything happening so that guy is like my favorite now. He does look like, he looks like every agent, comedy agent when I was about 10 years in. Heavy set, you know. But yeah, so I flip around too. Our attention spans are ruined.

Yeah. But it is fun to go like, especially late at night when they really get opinionated to Fox, to MSNBC, over to CNN, and just see how different the story is. Only one of them's even coming close to the truth. No. The Fox guys. They fired. See the look on his face? Don't you agree that they fired the talented Fox guys, though?

I mean, there's some people over there that are pretty weak these days. Well, you mean, if you're talking about like O'Reilly. Yes. Yeah, that was a big, big mistake. Greta Van Susteren, no. She looked like a small about like O'Reilly. Yes. Yeah, that was a big, big mistake. But what is... Greta Van Susteren, no. She looked like a small mouth bass and her voice was painful. You didn't like her at all?

Oh, Christ, no. I didn't like her presentation. I didn't like her looks. I, you know, I look at the tits first. But, um, no. She was, uh, you know, Shepard Smith. He fucking hates the president. Well, Shepard, you know, he was, uh...

Hates him. Like most women do. Why is that controversial? He's out of the closet. No, he was controversial. It's fucking funny. Mind if I fucking sell a joke for you? Sell it?

Is that how you do it? By turning your head like an owl? 360? I am so glad you can't. I'm serious. Because I didn't have much today. Well, you know what? I mean, I'm going to take some shit for this.

Why? Because I'm supposed to be doing another show. That's what I'm doing. Not Dean's? No, the Bonfire. Because one of them is going to do my show in Montreal that I wanted you for. I'm guessing it's Soda. Yeah.

Is it? Yeah. Yeah. Mr. Big Jay Oakerson, he's got a problem with me. We've asked him to do this show a coupleoder. Yeah. Is it? Yeah. Yeah. Mr. Big Jay Oakerson, he's got a problem with, we've asked him to do this show a couple times. Yeah. I did a gig with him

a couple weeks ago. Well, Jay in Montreal. Buffalo. Jay in Montreal has got 700 shows that he's doing. Right. So I won't be able to use him, but Soder, yeah.

I'm just a little pissed that Jay wouldn't come in here. Maybe. I bet your Comedy Central said don't go in there. Oh, is that what it is? I'm just a little pissed that Jay wouldn't come in here. Maybe. I bet your Comedy Central said don't go in there. Oh, is that what it is? I'm just saying, you know,

my paranoid guinea mind. You? Paranoid? I never expected that. You know, he hits on the racial and gender stuff. You might want to stay clear of that.

We'll let Daniel Tosh say whatever he wants because, you know, he has a harmless presentation. Well, you need to break it up a little bit with at least handicap jokes, don't you?

Yeah, black and brown and yellow and red handicap jokes. It's every headline's about white. Look at it. Why these professors are warning against promoting the work of straight white men. It's just flash mob of 500 teens confront Philly place. I read into that one. I'm just guessing the color of the kids. And how about Bill Nye?

The science guy? He's up for an Emmy. And look at this. Two black pastors are suing Coca-Cola. I can't help it. I don't even know where you find these stories. I have never. I go to a real obscure website.

It's called Drudge. Now, you, this sugar thing, that will be the next thing that they get to. The sugar is the fucking future tobacco. There's no doubt about it. Yeah, but, you know, and the tobacco, can we, they're having a field day. Those people, it's not even about, we all know it's bad for you, it'll kill you, give you a can, but they're having a field day with those commercials. Right.

And somebody's just, they're having fun with it, how gross they can get. Trying to watch the Yankees, and they're squeezing some guy's lung and like yogurt's coming out of it this is gonna happen i'm getting hungry i want a cannoli for christ's sake that's how quick i click too i can't i can't watch any of that shit and i'm just out i'm done the second i see that stuff it's not because it's too gross you're just tired of them preaching well it's gross and i'm tired yeah and you know i'm smoking a cigar while I'm watching. So, you know, I'm like, trying to enjoy a ballgame here.

And what's ironic is I'm starting, I was always a casual smoker. Yeah. One or two cigarettes maybe, and I go months without one. But lately, since it's warmed up, I'm on the front porch. My wife buys them. I don't buy them. Eight to ten on a day. That's a lot. Join the cigar club. All the comedians are smoking cigars. I don't like cigars. They're too thick. I don't buy them. Eight to ten now a day. That's a lot. Join the cigar club.

All the comedians are smoking cigars. I don't like cigars. They're too thick. I'm not comfortable with the circumference of my mouth. Okay. Too cockish for you. A little too cockish. Yeah.

Good word. Too cockish. A little too cockish. Michael Dukakis. He was your guy, right? Michael Dukakis from Massachusetts? Oh, my God. What a little Greek stupid.

By the way, here's a guy who lost the election for putting on a helmet that was too big for him that's how different the news is a guy could put on a helmet in a tank yeah and you're just like he's done he's out now i can't keep up with anything it wasn't just the helmet that was one of them but the other thing during the debates when they asked him remember it was a will Willie Horton question or something about, well, if somebody raped your wife, wouldn't you want them to get the death penalty? And he hemmed and hawed about it. Remember? Yeah, but I know his wife. You know his wife?

Cool. Kitty? Yeah. Kitty, he would have been better off if she was raped and killed. It would have been the best thing that would have happened to that tiny-headed bastard. Seriously, he has a head like a pea. And she was licking roll-on deodorant, remember? Yeah.

To get the booze out of it. Right. Talk about having an addiction. Yeah, and you're going, you know, honey, there's liquor stores. No one knows. No one cares whether you're in AA or not. You're that famous, you can't drive into a fucking liquor store. Honey, there's a liquor store.

Oh, I'll just pull this hair off this right guard. I don't even know if you can get high like that. Oh, you can. I did it. Can you? Oh, yeah. I guzzled like three old spice things in high school. I was fucked up for a week.

Remember that, though? She was licking roll-on things. She was licking that. They think she had drank some fucking furniture polish or something. Yeah, she did. Just go to a fucking liquor store. Pick up a bottle of gin. Like any other old drunk.

The coffee tape, it looks horrible. I know. Couldn't put a sheen on it. My wife finished it. She licked her tongue. She just tongued it for a fucking hour before he got home. What is he going to do with that tiny head? She's fucking running things.

Who did he run against? Was that Bush? I can't remember. Reagan, right? No, it was the first Bush. The first Bush. Yeah, the first Bush. Yeah, and he's a war hero, the first Bush.

And meanwhile, Dukakis has the balls to put on a helmet. It looked like a make-a-wish thing for a kid. Was he a hero? He got shot down, And Trump has taught us that You don't fucking No he was a fucking hero He floated around And they saved him

Yeah No I know I hated what Trump said about McCain I hated that And McCain just got his fucking skull Like part of his skull taken off today I hope it's the part that makes him think more like a Republican Oh Jesus Christ

He's the actual Republican. He's the guy who thinks like Republicans. No, he doesn't. He's a fucking rhino. Why? Because he doesn't... He disappoints me. Why?

Because he doesn't want... He disappoints me. He doesn't want a wall up or a fucking screen like Trump is now trying to sell us with slats. What the fuck is this? Is it a Venetian blind or is it a wall?

You pull the things. You know what? No way. Yes, that's what it is. Come on. Like curtains on a cheap fucking apartment. But he would have done, I think he could have just said, you know what? We should fix the fence.

And no one would have been mad at him. But he said build a wall. And now he's back to fence. Some places fence, some place wall. I don't think we need any of that. I say you put the military there. Three deep. For 8,000 miles, three deep.

Bayonets. I'm dead serious. First of all, there hasn't been bayonets since World War II. They don't even fucking make them anymore. And look what position we're in. We're being overrun. I make my point. You stab one of those illegals on the knee, they're not coming back.

They're getting an infection. When's the last time they used a bayonet? They didn't use it in the Korean War, right? The last time they used a bayonet, I remember seeing a picture of, it was actually McCain in Vietnam eating a melon. He's using it as a swizzle stick. We're talking to, not that I have to say this, the guy's been on the radio of it. He's using it as a swizzle stick. We're talking to, not that I have to say this,

the guy's been on the radio and he's a legend here, Ron Bennington, and I love, this is great. This is just awesome. Well, I didn't know that you would even want me.

I would have been here every night. I would have been here. Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah. I see how it is. You know, I thought I wanted to go solo. This is much.

Oh, it's better, isn't it? Yes, it is. Somebody's doing just, somebody that you can say, could say no you're wrong that's all you want in radio it's like you couldn't be more wrong i always look at people when they're agreeing i'm like why why are you agreeing disagree and get plenty of time you ever watch those fucking midday sports shows with those guys that they just pretend that they disagree? Oh, on ESPN? Yeah. They churn them out.

Yeah. They'll just go, who's got bigger feet, Larry Bird or Kevin McHale? Just the stupidest. Yeah. Doesn't that remind you of when you were in fifth and sixth grade? Your buddies would come in, who's a better fighter? This kid, Nicky Geek, used to throw out these totally they were totally subjective and he'd start off, you know,

it would be at a party in high school. He'd come in. What do you think was tough with Phil Esposito or fucking, and just start an argument and then leave. Here's the thing because they'll do it all the time with you know, fucking quarterbacks who play Johnny Unitas.

Oh, that type of shit yeah and you're like johnny united is dead everybody's better than him now give me the third string fucking guy from notre dame he's a better the quarterback than johnny united let the man's spirit rest terry hanratty versus tom brady when they were freshmen in college terry hanratty there was fucking plenty of people who wanted him. Because, you know, the fact... Everyone forgets now because Bradshaw's been on TV. Pittsburgh hated fucking Bradshaw for years. Oh, no.

People who know the football know that. Right. Absolutely. They literally wanted... What do they call him? Jefferson Street, Joe Gilliam. Joe Gilliam. Yeah, who was a heroin addict.

The people were chanting at him over Jefferson Street, Joe Gilliam. Joe Gilliam. Yeah, who was a heroin addict. The people were chanting at him over fucking Bradshaw. I know. And he'd nod off in the huddle, Gilliam. He had the nods. Hey, let's go to, do we have to break or no? Good. Let's go to Brian in Alabama. You got to have commercials to break, Dick.

I got commercials. Oh, I got a couple. You got some live reads to do? Oh, Christ, yeah. I'm going to fucking ruin that for you today. Brian in Alabama. Say hi to Ron Bennington. Hey, how live reads today, though? Oh, Christ, yeah. I'm going to fucking ruin that for you today. Brian, Alabama. Say hi to Ron Bennington. Hey, how's it going, guys?

What's up? You're in the Marines. Yes, sir, I was. I got out in 2005, but they still issue, that's a standard issue item is the K-Bar or a bayonet. Is that right? Thank you. I have not seen one. I told you. Or a bayonet. Is that right? I have not seen one.

I told you. You're going into the Apollo Prize closet. Help yourself. You stumped us. Semper Fi, baby. I did not know that. I swear to God, this is amazing to me. Yeah, I mean, they're not really used. We train with them, but, you know.

For what? When you run out of bullets? Basically, yeah. Or you just need to cut something on a patrol or something. Here's what I want you to do. for what when you run out of bullets basically yeah or you just need to cut something on a patrol or something go look this up in your log that you have your marine logs find out when the last person who died from a bayonet

that's the fucking person that we should name a day off after a guy like a couple weeks ago died he got stabbed in World War II an infection set in they were charged for murder do you ever hear that like something breaks loose when a guy was shot in the head back in the fucking 60s and then the guy who shot him who got out is now charged for murder is that right that's right yeah hey brian where'd you do your training my dad was at camp lejeune yeah i was out of uh camp pendleton so

but i i was in yorktown, Virginia for a couple years also. I did training basically all over, including Lejeune. There you go. Well, thanks. Thank you for backing me up, Ryan, and thanks for your service. You got me. Hey, man, no problem. Take it easy, guys. Take it easy. So bayonets are still

out there. See, that's the type of listener we get. An ex-Marine, informed. Why didn't you go in? Who kept you? I had eczema, seborrhea, and psoriasis. Now, was your dad in any of the wars? Just the one with my mother.

Last about, I'd say, 31 years and he's still fucked up over it. No, he didn't see any action. But boy, did he have great stories, man. Just he was on a train and he was with a drunk buddy. And the drunk buddy sees like an army sergeant's jacket. So his buddy starts pissing on the jacket because it's an army jacket, not a Marine.

And then the guy comes out of the bathroom. It's like a six foot six. My father had to fight the guy because his buddy was so small and skinny. Stuff like that. And that's who you're saying thank you for your service to guys like that. This guy did not do that. Oh, my God. My father was in the Navy, World War II.

He's 91 years old now. Your dad was in World War II in the Navy. Left high school. They graduated kids early. I don't know, halfway through his senior year. Over in the Philippinesilippines and you know uh when the bomb dropped he was part of they called it there there was a thing called like like the evasion of japan or something it was supposed they were supposed to hit japan the

same way someday and he was like fuck this kind of sucks and then the bomb went off and he's like wow and he was where when it went off uh he was in the philippines when you know it's not like he was any party on vacation yeah he was on vacation it was on a sex vacation he was literally on a sex vacation you put those young girls in a basket you have a fucking rope they go up and down on your cock but uh yeah that's what he literally said he goes that's sandals he said to me goes, the first vote I ever had, Truman. I owed him. My dad's a Republican for life, right?

He seriously, he watches, he's 91. I was just down there last weekend. And he watches Fox News like Belichick watches game tape. He's just on it. He's rewinding. This is my dad too Yeah That's his dad too

Same thing My dad was in Burma Myanmar In World War II Is that right? Yeah it was in Army Engineer Corps Imagine that

And they dropped the bomb He said yeah We never saw it My dad How old's your dad? My dad would be 94 October It's unbelievable right? Yeah

My dad didn't see action He watches porn tape Like Belichick Watches game tape I imagine it's Belichick watching on the tape i don't know you've you've used that reference before i love it i love it too i watch it like the sapruta film let's go to frank in the bronx frank hello how are you gentlemen gentlemen ronnie boy i've been following you on twitter what a great family you got there i saw your aunt

and your uncle. You're a good man. Beautiful photos. No? No good? I don't get the bet. I don't understand. You've lost...

I'm so happy. I think it's great that you're spending time with the family. That's all. Oh, that's what he said. He saw photos of you on... I'm not on Twitter. I don't have an... Oh, it's...

No? That's nice, though. Somebody's fucking with me? Yeah, somebody's fucking with you. Somebody's messing with you, Frank. DM me, and I'll fucking show you the real pictures. I got a blowjob from him, too. Are you on social media?

Thank you, Frank. Do you do social media at all? I don't. I don't go on Facebook. I go into... I get excited about it for like a week, like Twitter. Right. You know, I'll hit it hard for a week, and then I won't touch it for three months.

Facebook, I just, it's too much. It's overwhelming. They need to clean up the page. I'm on a timeline. There's my mother at a wedding. Next thing you know, it's, you know, one of my college buddies. I picture him pissing behind a dorm. Do you get listeners on that, though?

The same thing that you're seeing your mom's picture on? Do the listeners contact you on Facebook? Some of them, though, yes. Are you on that? No, I've never joined Facebook. I've never joined Twitter. Put the show on those things, but not me. We have a Twitter show account.

Great job. You're on the edge. I can't stand the shit. I was just telling him beforehand. I just went on it this weekend just for a second, and I catch a negative remark. That's it for you? You're furious? That's it.

You're ready to bayonet in your fucking neck. I'm like Trump. John in Vermont. John, go ahead. You nasty civilians, you. There's no such thing as an ex-Marine there, Mr. DiPaolo. That's it. You know, John, you make a valid point.

Once a Marine, always a Marine. I feel that way about child pedophiles, too. You know what? To me, if that's true, they'd still be sending them checks. Oh, now did you hear that from the smart-mouthed liberal from Philly? I heard him. Ronnie, I like you anyway. Oh, did you hear that? From the smart-mouthed liberal from Philly. I heard him. Ronnie, I like you anyway. Well, you know what? That's very nice of you.

Thanks for killing minorities over the past 100 years. When's the last time? Was it World War II since we killed a white person? We kill whoever's asking for it. They just happen to be black and brown. Seriously? Because Australia's been unnerving me for a while. Here's the problem

with Australia. You're a country or a continent? Fucking make up your mind. You can't be both. You can't be a country. What's it? 77 million square miles and there's 11 people living there. It's kind of a... Thank you for the call, John. You ever notice that? You go anywhere in the world, there's fucking

Australians there? I don't go anywhere in the world. I wouldn't go to Montreal. I really wanted you there for this. This fucking show would have been perfect for you. You know, if my aunt had a dick, it would be my uncle. I don't even know what that means. I don't either. That was a quote under my yearbook picture in high school.

We got a quest. Daryl wants to know about Ronnie's cig quest. Daryl wants to know about Ronnie's cigars. Daryl from Oklahoma. Go ahead. Hey, guys. Love the show. I'd love to see you two pair up.

I think so. We talked about that before to go out and do something together. Do they have that kind of money? No, he means every night, radio show. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I get to do two shows.

What's that? Go ahead, Daryl. What kind of cigars do you prefer? You have Enduro, you have Natural. What brands do you smoke? Uncircumcised. Most of my cigars come to me from listeners. And it's just wonderful as they mail them in. So,

Romeo and Juliet, that's what you can get from me. Alright? Go out and get a big barrel and I'll say your name on the radio. Won't that be fun? To hear your name mentioned on the radio? Thank you, my friend. Love you guys. Thank you. See you, Darrell.

But we talked about going out and doing something together sometime. What do you mean? This is before you got this show here. What do you mean going out? You're like, we'll go out and we'll do a theater, we'll do some clubs or something, and you know. What, but like you'll be hosting a live event? Whatever we do.

It doesn't matter to me what the show is. As long as, you know, we split the door. Yeah. Yeah. You want to split the door? Absolutely. I'll tell you what. We'll split the door.

You put up 70% of the. What do we have to put up? Don't we got to lock these clubs in? Or are you just letting them take the bar? Oh, we're doing clubs? I was thinking theaters already. I'm thinking bigger than that. All right.

Well, who's paying for the fucking theater then who's paying for the theater rental um we'll get the guy the serious we'll pitch the serious guy can't we bob in new mexico what's going on hi bob is the water. And this is the well. Drink full, and descend. The horses will wire the eyes, and dark within. Yeah. Here's some audio of Trump today.

He's on CNN. I'm smart. I'm like everybody says. Like, don't. I'm smart. I'm like everybody says. Like, don't. I'm smart. And I want the specs. Is that Don Jr.? That was Don Jr.

Not Don Cheney. Yeah. Did you see him yesterday at the golf course? He had the, like the boy in the bubble. He had to stay behind the glass. Oh, you were going to say something? No, I'm laughing. He was what?

Behind the glass? He was behind the glass. I guess they wouldn't let him out around fucking people. And his own golf course. Yeah. Because some bitchy. Go ahead. Let it go.

Let it fucking go. Female golfers. Yeah. I'd say about half of them don't like men and half do. Most of them are Asian from what I saw yesterday. I don't follow a lot of female guys. They're Asian? Yeah, there was just tons of Asian.

Like the top five finishers were all Asian. Is that right? Yeah. Oh, God. What can we do? One of the kids had a club foot too and was just using it. Fucking teeing off with a club foot. I'm like, that's cheating.

Was that Tom Dempsey? What club should I use? Ah, your club foot. I'm like, that's cheating. Was that Tom Dempsey? What club should I use? Ah, your left foot. Pull it out of the bag. So you're saying an Asian girl with a club foot won? Yeah. Asian girl won. Asian girl finished second. Asian girl finished third. Sounds like it's rigged. Yeah. I'll say that's

an R you used, right? Trump will look into this. He was loving it because they said that he had tweeted something like 20 times how proud he was of the course. The course looked fucking great. Did he? Yeah, he was just tweeting. Like, this is great. Show me one Democrat who has got a golf course like this.

But I do know a guy, my neighbor, who was, he knew somebody who worked for Trump at his courses, and it was a woman, actually, and she was like, what do you call the hostess at one of his places? Not Maya Largo, another one. But anyways,

he talked to her and said, he comes down, Trump would come down, go right out and talk to all the people that work there on the grounds the blue call of people make it go every day and He'd see that you know this guy's This guy's tractor was broken one of the grounds keep but then he'd go back to management go in and then ask them How is everything and of course management blow smoke up his ass saying everything's fine You know, everything's perfect buh buh buh and he would he would say oh no it's not go talk to jose about his tractor you're working this one too hard he's

he's a man of the people that's a story an anecdote and in the meantime he's fucking going behind the back of his management you know what i mean that's like if i started walking around your stuff how's fucking neck acting huh is he okay with you see how he puts a spin on what are you talking about now if he went to management with you? See how he puts a spit on it? What are you talking about? Now, if he went to management first, he'd be saying, see, he's a fucking rich 1% asshole. He went out to Jose,

who was, you know, digging the sand traps. My mom, my sister, they all love Trump, too, and they love the family, and they love the little kid, the expert, whatever his name is, the big tall kid that's like 10. So they're like, he's such a sweet boy.

And I told him that in his school on the Upper East Side, I said he got mad at the teachers and he went in his shit in the pool. And my mom and my sister were like, what? And my mom actually said this, was he sick? I go, no. I go, he's so fucking rich that if you give him any shit, he'll shit in the pool and make you clean it up.

My mom was heartbroken. You tell your mother that? Yeah. Oh, my God. This is the thing. I wish I didn't. I wish I wasn't that kind of person. But to make a point, I saw them feeling some joy about something.

So I had to get in there as quick as I could. Jesus Christ. You're mean. Yeah, I know. I really am not happy about it. We're talking to the legend, if you haven't recognized his voice. Fez.

Hello! One more question for you, because I really, I was supposed to do another show at 6. Guns and Roses, you going? Where and when? It's Thursday night at the Apollo. It's a big GNR show for the for the people right here

um is axel gonna be 12 hours late probably yeah that's a big no i would love to are they really at the apollo the apollo yeah it's a serious xm show yes no kidding subscriber event we've got a brand new serious uh xm uhs N' Roses channel. That's right. Yeah. They just play Appetite for Destruction fucking 400 times in a row. I play Chinese Democracy. I didn't hear anything from anybody.

Wasn't that the last album? Yeah, I think so. What's Axl weighing in at now? I don't want to be there when he drops dead. He looks all right. I saw him last summer. They were great. Sounds great, too. They sounded great. You're kidding, right? I'm not kidding. He tou't want to be there when he drops dead. He looks all right. I saw him last summer. They were great. Sounds great.

They sounded great. You're kidding, right? I'm not kidding. He toured with ACDC, too, last year. He looked horrible and sounded horrible like 10 years ago, but now he's back. Now he's back. Now I'm interested. Yeah.

What time does it start? We'll go after the show. 10 o'clock. We'll head up. Jesus, that sounds good. Yeah. Slash? Yeah, Slash is there.

Better than ever. I don't like the keyboard play. Yeah. Slash? Yeah, Slash is there. Better than ever. I don't like the keyboard play. What was the name? Kevin? Kevin. Kevin O'Toole? Now you got me thinking. We get a break?

We really do? All right. Thank you so much, buddy. No, thank you, Ronnie. I really didn't have much to come out of the gates with. What are you saying right now? I can stop by anytime I want? What are you kidding me?

You are the legend here. All right. Yeah. I'll do that. Maybe they'll like our chemistry next thing you know. Yeah. I can stop by anytime I want. What are you kidding me? You are the legend here. All right. Yeah. Maybe they'll like our chemistry next thing you know. Yeah. I'm going to make a few bucks. All right, guys. Enjoy your show.

Thank you so much, Ron. Say hi to Gail, too. I will. Going to have her on. I saw her in the hallway, so tell her I didn't forget. That's the great Ron Bennington. We've got to take a break, folks. 866-969-1969.

We come back. I don't know. We'll talk about... I was thinking about doing steroids. I saw Stallone on the internet. The guy's what? 86? And he's still shredded. I don't know how he's alive or Arnold. So I'm still kicking that around. Joe Rogan says I should do it. And we'll talk about

some college professors are warning against promoting the work of straight white men. What else? Back after this. The Nick DiPaolo Show will return after this. The Nick DiPaolo Show returns now. Welcome back. Final segment of Monday. Went by fast.

Bennington. Comes in. That was key, wasn't it? Having a legend in the house. 866-969-1969. A week from tomorrow night, July 25th, I'll be at the Fat Black Pussycat. Go to ComedyCellar.com for tickets or go to my website, NickDip.com. And check out our overnight show.

You can hear this again at 2 a.m. in the East, 11 in the West, and you can listen on demand at any time. And hit me up on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, at Nick DiPaolo. And Bill Nye is up for an Emmy. Do you see this? He had some gender spectrum. What's it?

It says my vagina has its own voice. Drag queen, drag king, just do it feels right. You're all tall, pansexual, flirty, wood sprite. Who enjoys a fleshlight in the cold moonlight with a sad clown skyping by a satellite? Just some of the lines

which generated a massive profits boost for the trauma counseling industry earlier this year in response to the car crash viral internet sensation horror show that was episode nine of bill nye's save the world series now that somebody doesn't like him who wrote this and now the story's taking even a worse turn. It's been, that segment has been nominated for an Emmy Award. Anything that has transsexual anything gets nominated. It's how it works.

It's how Hollywood works. It's just, are you embarrassed? It's just how biased and transparent and that scene from Nye's Netflix show, a transgender-celebrating song and dance routine starring actress Rachel Bloom,

was celebrated across the internet as one of the most embarrassing moments in the history of television. Yet it got it nominated for an Emmy. So too was the ensuing Codd Scientific lecture in which Nye bade farewell to whatever last tattered shreds remained of his credibility by explaining that there are not, in fact, just two sexes, male and female, but lots and lots of different genders and a range of lovely, vibrant flavors. But I've said that on the show. I actually agree with him, didn't I?

I say there is a spectrum. There's a lot between uh you've seen him and we're just it's funny we're just talking about steroids and hormones and estrogen and stuff some people get too much of the female juice some don't get enough i mean so there is kind of a spectrum i kind of agree with that part of it but just getting him him getting nominated for an emmy because he touched on that in his series. And, you know, you know, I had a history with a little bit of a history with Mr. Scientist Bill Mai. I was on with Anthony Comey on a podcast and I set him up.

I came out and I said that I had flunked out of the University of Maine just to see how he would react with his pompous. And sure enough, he took the bait. I got it somewhere here. Flunked out of the University of Maine. Yeah. You flunked out. Yeah.

I think we're all shocked. It happens. I don't like your sarcasm, asshole. This ain't the fucking Bill Marshall, Bill. This guy's like a mechanical engineer. He's not even a real, uh, ain't the fucking Bill Marshall, Bill. Ah, this guy's like a mechanical engineer. He's not even a real, he's a, you know,

he's a savvy marketing savvy genius is what he is. I wish he, I wish he handled me as he could have been my manager. Guy knows PR, but, um, that was one of the funniest moments ever. Oh Jesus.

So yeah, he's, uh, one of his episodes in that series is going to be nominated for an Emmy. Again, because they touched on, you know, on transgender and anything, you know. You touch on it and you're up for a... Putting him up for an Emmy, everybody. The episode raised concern for conservatives and YouTube denizens alike, many of whom mocked the show for awkwardly associating social sciences with physical science. That's the big thing, you know. The Republicans, everybody said, well, you're the party of no science, you know.

But then the Democrats will say, well, if a guy has a peepee and says he's a girl, he's a girl. Well, that sort of fucking goes against what you just... Who's the party of anti-science? Anyhow, I just wanted to touch on that. But that's because Hollywood, they do. They really like her. Well, like McMurphy said in Cuckoo's Nest. She likes a rigged game, you know what I mean?

When it comes to award shows, they like a rigged game. It's so... it's just so... Anyways, I wanted to talk about this last night in Germantown, you know, outside of Philly, the Lonnie Young Recreation Center. There was a flash mob of 500 teens.

You know, they were between ages of 12 and 17, so excellent parents. And here's the report on... Flash mob effectively shut down this rec center, and we can still show you some of the remnants of the glass bottles here that the crowd ended up throwing at police when officers arrived. We got this video from publicly available social media posts.

It shows the crowd of about 500. Police say most were 12 to 17 years old. Officers tried to disperse the crowd, and that's when the teens began hopping on cars and throwing those glass bottles at officers. In some images, you can see them really daring officers to escalate the situation. Police instead decided to wait things out and contain the crowd, not making any arrests. Oh. Not making any arrest. I don't know.

You might want to make some fucking arrests. Where's the deterrent to not to do it again? Oh, there was no damage. Let's not onlyrent to not to do it again oh there was no damage let's know they put a positive spin on it officers being hurt officers weren't hurt and and nobody get arrested wait then i don't want to hear about the next time 500 gather and start throwing rocks and bottles at you again i don't want to hear the whining and then the uh i love the uh the message from uh captain drew techner of the philadelphia police said uh parents need to be aware first of all he says parents plural you mean parent don't you you guys can go look at the video on Facebook, whatever. I'm not, you know, I'm just saying it's the usual suspects.

But parents need to be aware that when they're sending their juveniles out, he says. I know it's nice to get the fresh air and be out with friends on a summer night, but parents have to be aware of what their kids are doing. Don't make me fucking laugh. Who they are with, who they're with and uh what they're getting involved in they need to be home at a decent hour he's he's kidding right they have to know where their kids are and who they're hanging out with. It's a fucking slash. Excuse me. Gotta be kidding me. But how do you not make any arrests?

It just said in the report they were throwing bottles at the cops. This is why we're finished as a fucking nation. Because if somebody did make an arrest, it'd be sharp. Then whoever would be out there and all, you know, cops would, you know, have to tackle somebody and then they'd be... It really is all falling apart, isn't it? In the name of political correctness.

500 kids out there throwing bottles at the cops. But, you know, everybody went home. There wasn't any damage, so we'll just forget about it until the next time. My solution is, and I keep saying it, rubber bullets.

I love the idea of rubber bullets. Although when the Red Sox won a World Series, I think it was 2007 or might have been the 2013. I can't remember the last one. We've won so many lately. A girl got killed by a rubber bullet. There was a little bit of, you know, shenanigans going on. They were celebrating late at night after the Sox won. A girl was at the parade the next day or something.

Got a cop, shot a rubber bullet, hit her in the eye. But I'm just pointing. What's so funny? Andy Flowers is laughing at that. I don't know why. Huh? I don't know. I know why you're laughing.

You're a Yankees fan, you big dink. I'm telling you, rubber bullets is the solution. Spray these kids with rubber frickin' bullets. These things hurt. They hurt. These rubber bullets, I'll shoot you in the ass. The Red Sox won't bother. But I'm telling you, you can't just not do anything.

Fire hoses, I guess, would bring up bad memories of the 50s and 40s, but also a very effective water cannon. Seriously, I don't want to hear it from the cops then, from Philly the next time this happens. There's got to be deterrent. All those kids are going to go, hey, that didn't work out that bad. None of us got arrested. Let's fuck with the cops a week from Tuesday.

And it'll be a thousand next time. Anybody feel that way? Or might just be in a big dink. 866-969-1969. Chris in Michigan. Welcome to the show. Hey, Nick. What's going on, man? How you doing, Chris?

Good, good. Yeah, I agree with you completely. I think they should have made... They should have arrested every... Well, I mean, as many of those kids as possible, you know? I mean, but they would be... They would just go to a juvenile prison because they were all underage. Well, they wouldn't go to prison at all.

They'd get a slap on the wrist or whatever. But when you were, Chris, I don't know how old you are, when you were a kid, if you were throwing bottles at the cops, wouldn't you be immediately arrested? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, maybe they could use, like you were mentioning, rubber bullets. What about, like, paintball guns? Yeah, paintball.

I don't think that hurts as much as a rubber bullet, but yeah, whatever. Whatever stings. BB guns. I don't give a shit. Slingshots. Wrist rockets. Super soakers with cat piss in them. Just let them know that they were in a fucking fight and give them a reason not to come back.

Yeah, there's no deterrence if uh if they don't arrest anybody or or don't shoot them i don't know chris those parents when they get home i bet those parents will give him a good talking to him and it won't happen again yeah but but by the way you were talking about the uh the transsexual thing uh i had a i saw caitlin jenner was running for a senate did you catch that? I did see a picture of it, yes. Yeah, I heard she might make it mandatory for all men to cut their dicks off. Did you, Chris?

That's a good one. I love it. While feminists look on, it's live taped on CNN. All righty, Chrissy. Nice talking to you, fella. All right, thanks. Nobody hit him with a paintball gun. God damn it. The hell?

John in Kansas on line two. John, welcome to the show. Hey there, Nick. You know, this shit's nothing new. You look on YouTube, they got, you know, them doing these flash mobs. Yeah, I know. You need stores and all that shit, you know? I know, John, but that's my point.

It's nothing new, and it should be something new is my point. It's nothing new because they don't do anything. They don't arrest these kids, and they're going to keep doing it. So just because it's nothing new doesn't mean it shouldn't be stopped, right? True, true. But, you know, I did have another question for you. Yeah, go ahead. Now, Nick, when you say usual suspects, do you mean shruggies?

No, no, no, no, no. You know what I mean. Just the punks. Oh, okay. Yeah. Okay, I thought you were hanging around Anthony Cummings. No. You know, the better rough dog.

Jesus Christ. All right, John. John from Kansas. I wouldn't think he would have known that derogatory term. But, you know, I'm saying just the usual suspect. Young kids without supervision supervision let's put it that way who uh don't have much guidance in their life that's all i'm saying now i didn't look up the i didn't look up the demographics of germantown specifically matter of fact a kid that

i played ball with up at maine our captain was from Germantown, PA. I could have Googled the demographics, but that would have been racist to me. I just looked at the footage on the news. And I know I'm not supposed to draw any conclusions, so I won't. Who's the guy out there wandering? Andy. That is Ben from the Golf Channel. I thought he was like a thug. He's from the Golf Channel. I thought he was like a thug.

He's from the Golf Channel? He looked like a kind of a white supremacist guy with a mean look on his face and a shaved head. He's from the Golf Channel. Okay. Let's go to Cody in Wyoming who wants to weigh in on the flash mob of 500 teens throwing bottles at the police in Philly, yet no arrests. Cody in Wyoming, your thoughts, sir?

How you doing, guys? You know, in my opinion, man, the second that bottles hit, you know, riot shields or hit policemen, arrests should have started happening that fucking second. Oh, that's horrible, Cody. You're just being a fascist pig. They should be able to... Well, fuck, I know, right? And see, it's the same thing.

Like, I'm sure you've heard of Antifa, and I don't know, did you see the interview with the one, maybe he's 25 years old, saying that horses are racist and fascist? Did you guys see that? Yeah, that sounds, fill us in on the specifics. Well, basically, there was,

I can't remember which news network it was and who the reporter was, but he had an interview with this kid who said stabbing or slashing a New York City policeman's horse in the neck was justifiable because the horse was a racist or a bigot or whatever the fuck excuse they're coming up with now. But back to the point of it is, all of these kids that are doing that shit,

all these Antifa fuckers, you know, Antifa is supposedly the anti-fascist. Anti-fascist, yes. Look at all the shit they do and tell me that they're not fascist. Of course they're fascist. It is. It's really irony defined. Exactly. Yeah.

It's fucking, I just can't believe where we are. And it's going to continue if you don't, like I said, rob a bullet. Yeah, I'm with you. It blows my fucking mind. I mean, 10 years ago, we didn't have these issues. Fucking white milk wasn't racist. You know, shit like that. I don't understand how the fuck fuck as the greatest country in the world

we got to this point i do it's called liberalism and it has to be fucking defeated well yeah but i mean i grew up when i was in high school i was i was like hardcore liberal and then i grew i fucking grew up exactly um you know and socially for the most part i am still pretty liberal but i i just don't get where the fucking turning point was for these guys well yeah especially when it comes to the issue of race we've let we've let the left uh handle it uh for the last 40 years and they have totally butchered it and this is the result hey Cody thank you I got a bunch of calls here I only have a few minutes left

thank you for the call Cindy in Massachusetts we always like to have a woman's point of view Cindy hey Nick what's up Cindy hello are you there yes Cindy go ahead hey just real CBS Philadelphia What's up, Cindy? Hello, are you there? Yes, Cindy, go ahead.

Hey, just real quick. CBS Philadelphia said that, and I'm reading this, it said the police were told to stand down as to not escalate the situation. Yeah, that's... So it wasn't the cops those little bastards well you know you know who they are you know how they got here okay who's paying for them who told him to stand down the mayor um according to i can't hear you thank you for the call thank you for the call can't hear you. Thank you for the call.

Thank you for the call. Can't hear a word you're saying. You can't tell me we're going forward as far as fucking phone technology either. Okay? Fucking Steve Jobs, I'm glad you're dead. Give me a fucking break. Every other call. Give me a fucking break.

Every other call... There's a reason we didn't have cell phones for 50 years in this country. They still don't work. Marty's got a good idea in Seattle. It doesn't surprise me. It's beanbags. Marty. Hey, how you doing? They have these beanbag shots because beanbags. Marty. Hey, how you doing?

Now, they have these beanbag shots for shotguns. Yeah. That'll just knock your ass down. They're the same ones that you guys play hacky sack with. No, no, no. Come on. Don't go there. Don't go there. No, actually, beanbags, it's a good idea.

They've been around for quite a few years. They have, but I like the idea of a rubber bullet. It seemed like it would hurt more than a beanbag. Oh, yeah, it would. But have you ever seen a guy get hit with one of those beanbag shots? No, I haven't.

I've thrown him back about a good five feet. Well, like I said, a girl was killed by a rubber bullet, so I was killed by a rubber bullet, so I'm leaning towards a rubber bullet. All right, thanks, Marty. I know what he's talking about. Take care.

I know, you can go, ever go on the internet and look at, these fucking crazy-ass kids are like, yeah, I'm going to put this bulletproof vest and shoot me with this. And sometimes they end up killing their friends and shit. Again, it's thinning out the herd i understand that but um i i i just got infuriated listening to the newscast and uh no property damage and nobody was arrested and i'm sure the cops were told to stand down but my point being by who the commissioner commissioner? The police commissioner? Whoever. That makes me even more furious. So don't whine when they do it again. I know we've lost

the concept of deterrent. I'm trying to think what I did. My father backhanded me and I never did it again. Many things. I came home drunk one night. Shit face. That out of my mind. I put an Elio's pizza in the toast oven. Went downstairs to watch the Carson monologue. it again many things i came home drunk one night shit face that out of my mind i put an elios pizza in the toast oven went downstairs to watch the carson monologue woke up with my father shaking me it's broad daylight he's holding the elios pizza it was the size of a wallet it still had

smoke coming off it he smacked me in the face and i had i almost burnt down the house. I laid down to watch the Carson monologue, woke up the next morning with him holding an Elio's pizza. Can you imagine? I could have killed us all. I'm sitting here with my coat still on. Just picture that. I open my eyes and the sun's up. And there's the old man. I can see the silhouette.

An Elio's pizza was, 8, 10 inches wide. It was the size of a wallet with, like, still, like, little blue flames coming off. I had that. That's why I couldn't be a dad. I would have shot my kid with real bullets if he did that. Real bullets. Let's go to Dean in Chicago. Dean.

Hey, Nick. How's it going, buddy? Pretty good. Listen, I agree with you. Something needs to be done. Nobody has any fear for authority. Even their parents, they have no fear of when their parents tell them to go to their room or try to take their phone away.

These kids are 13 to 17. I say wrangle as many of them as you can in that situation and make them wear a pink jumpsuit and pick up garbage in front of the fucking school that they're supposed to be in. Yeah. They wouldn't show up for that either. And, you know, and they wouldn't show up. Well, they'd hold their parents liable for it. Well, you keep saying.

Come get them out of the jailhouse at night then. All right. You keep saying parents, plural. I will bet you a thousand bucks. Well, okay, then grandparent, aunt, whatever, guardian whoever the hell that lives with that kid yeah come get him and if he doesn't have a phone number let him sit there somebody's eventually going to be missing that kid and come get him yeah again whether it's an aunt grandmother and then hold that person liable this kid better show up on this day or your ass is in trouble well

there you go fucking fast you know i mean it you know, I mean, it's a, I'm sure it costs a lot of money to have something like that going on to make, you know, the cities are all crying broke, especially here in Chicago. Illinois is fucked. So, I mean, what is the solution to the problem other than you have to show authority and some kind of, there's got to be some kind of consequences for your actions. If I don't pay my bills, they'll come take their shit.

Yeah, no, I know. That's what I'm talking about. Thank you, Dean, for the call. There was 40, by the way, this is off the subject from the flash mob things, but there was over 40 shootings this weekend in Chicago, 10 of them fatal. Do you understand? That didn't go on in some places in Iraq. It's literally a war zone as far as i'm changing subjects now but again trump talked about bringing the national guard in what are you doing what are you waiting

for so it's almost like it's i guess we are being naive it's all i don't know. It's payback for past indiscretions. I don't know. But it just infuriated me when I watched the... We get time for one more call before the end of the show. Let's go to Ted in New York. Ted. What's up, Nick? How you doing, brother? Good.

How you doing, Ted? Good. Yeah, man. Definitely an accountability issue. And what was that shit that happened in philly where the mayor actually blew up a building oh yeah squatters in there yes there was squatters in a crack house that wouldn't leave and yeah he blew it up exactly yeah so that's that's the thing man there's like somebody's got to be accountable and there's got to be a fear

factor exactly ted i gotta i gotta cut you short We're coming to the end of the show. Thank you so much, though, for calling. But it's true, man. Those 500 kids, why wouldn't they come back in a week and do it again? It's just in the news. They have to sweet-talk on the local news.

Hey, that's everything that's fine. Nobody got hurt. No windows are broken. I sound like Billy Brown. I did that, didn't I? That's it, kids. Thank you to all the callers tonight. We'll be back here.

Same bat time, same bat channel. And again, listen to The Overnights at 2 a.m. in the east and 11 p.m. in the west. It's the Nick DiPaolo Show. We'll talk to you tomorrow night. Take care. Hey, hey, I saved the world today. Tomorrow night. Take care. Everybody's happy now, the good things here stay. Please let it stay. Let it stay.