The Nick DiPaolo Show - 9/11 Possible 5th Plane? | Nick Di Paolo Show #1373

Episode Date: March 21, 2023

5th 9/11 Plane Got Lucky.  Dem Who Defunded Police Wants More Police. 3 Point Dagger. Meteorologist Has Fainting Spell On Air.   Join Nick for bonus content at Patreon! www.patreon.com/thenickdipaoloshow Go see Nick on the road! www.nickdip.com/tour for tickets!

Hi, ladies and gentlemen, and anything in between. First of all, I want to thank you fans again for watching and supporting this show. You are a lifeblood, you know that. Now, I've got some news that I'm excited about that I want to share with you guys. As you may have heard, or may not have heard, in yesterday's announcement, we are going to be moving the exclusive part of the show over to Rumble next month and joining the Mug Club, which is Steven Crowder's operation. That means you'll not only get my show on the

platform, it's a platform that really supports free speech, you're also going to get access to some really great shows with guys like Jimmy Brewer and Brian Callen and Crowder himself, with guys like Jimmy Brewer and Brian Callen and Crowder himself, who, as far as internet shows go, I'll put his up against anybody. And, you know, he thinks like we do. And you'll get all this for less money than you're spending now. It's really a win-win. Now, please don't do anything yet.

I'll let you know when it's time to make the switch and how to do that. If you're on Patreon, keep an eye out for that within a week or so. And that's it for now. I'm excited and I hope you guys are excited too. It's going to be a lot of fun. guitar solo We'll do it live. Okay. We'll do it live! Fuck it! That's me yelling at Dallas. Do it live!

I'll write it and we'll do it live! Fucking thing sucks. That never gets old. That was my father every day, every minute. Until he died. Even when he died. He had to put his middle finger down. He had to tape it down in the casket.

How you doing, folks? It's a filthy Tuesday from the state of Georgia. Hope you enjoyed the big announcement. I'm excited. Can you tell? I know the desk is in the way, but can you tell? Yeah. They announced it on when? Sunday? Crowder? I think they released it Sunday. This is big, man. You know, he's got a huge following. I was doing the math and you know He had a deal with Fox and the blaze and then and you know They always try to take advantage of the corporations and whatnot Steve's a little too smart for that shit And then friggin YouTube like demonetized him

I mean he had literally an army that could take on a real, fuck, at least one of those ragtag armies from, you know, Kashshistan. But I was doing the math. I was texting him, so he couldn't tell. I remember calculating, he had 350,000 followers at like $89 a page. I'm fucking smashing my, I go, that can't be. The number was way too big. But I guess, like I said, they cut his balls off YouTube. So this is his, he gathered his troops again. And I put my money on that guy.

And Eddie, you've seen him go on college campuses and debate people. He'll fucking sit down and say, you know, guns are great, tell me where I'm wrong, and then have a bunch of fucking hippies and girls who haven't douched in three years line up to tell him where he's an asshole, and he wins every time. I used to say, Steve, why, you should have became a lawyer, and then I did the math on what he's making with his internet show. He should have been the president of a country. Anyways, what did I do last night?

I watched nothing. I like to go on YouTube and this is... Dallas knows this about me. I watch a couple things late at night on YouTube. I watch female pelvic exams on YouTube. I'm not kidding you. You can do this at one in the afternoon. I know I've said it on the show before.

It's a fucking broad in her 20s with a vagina hanging out, feet in the stirrups. Am I going to watch that or Andy Griffith rerun? Come on. And yeah, on YouTube at one o'clock. And like I told you, I got booted from YouTube

because I said masks don't work during the COVID fucking thing what so I watch that and I watch people getting hit by cars in Russia you ever do that oh or China I saw the sickest thing in China

if you want to see communism you know just fucking just a microcosm of it how it develops the sickest thing in China, if you want to see communism, you know, just fucking, just a microcosm of it, how it develops like a feeling, just a dead people inside, a society that just sees themselves in numbers. There's a little girl in China, she had to be like four across, gets hit by a fucking car, and she's laying there, and people are driving the fuck around her. Okay? I don't know why I say that like that doesn't happen in the United States now,

because it does. Because that's where we're headed. Apparently we look up to China now, at least the elites do. But, you know, you hear stories all the time about a fucking woman being raped on a subway and eight people filming it. So who am I to pick on the fucking yellowheads? What? That's old school racism. That was terrible. That'll get me kicked off Crowder.

Won't it? I promise never to say it again. Yeah, anyways. All right, let's move on with the goddamn thing. Hey, tomorrow. Not tomorrow, next week. Forget it. Fuck it. Schedule's too complicated.

Let's start with, let's go back in history a little bit. Did you see this headline this weekend? Fifth plane on 9-11 got lucky. This is so weird because I saw this on, my wife saw it first. This is so weird because I saw this on my wife's side first. She has an uncle whose brother is a pilot and then all of a sudden we see him on TV talking about this story. I think it was Fox or whatever. And he looks just like Andy's uncle. And I fucking, you know, I was like, oh, my God, that you're, and sure enough, the captain of the United Airlines flight scheduled to take off the morning of September 11th, 2001, is convinced his plane was intended to be part of the coordinated terrorist attack. There is a good chance that somebody was plotting to try to use our airplanes as a weapon of mass

destruction. Pilot Tom Manello, that's him, looks just like the other guy. I got to find out if they're twins or not. This is him in a fake plane on his front lawn. No. Tom Manello says, why is TMZ covering this shit? Is that who we want on this fucking case? A guy, you know, a network who, you know, fucking has 11 cameras focused on Britney Spears' twat when she gets out of a limo with no underwear, and now they're going to do hard news? Anyways, TMZ investigates 9-11. What the fuck?

Oh, my God. TMZ, yeah, put me in charge of investigating fucking Afghanistan. I'll give you a whole new take. Anyways, The Fifth Plane, they're calling it, premiering Monday, 9 p.m. on Fox. Those dirty pricks on 9-11, huh? TMZ said it has to be true, because they've talked to people like Axl Rose.

TMZ said it spent six months investigating. That's a long time for them. Right? It's usually Keith Richards at the airport. Hey, you still doing heroin? Get out of here, you cocksucker. They spent months investigating the suspicious and alarming activities

aboard Flight 23, a Boeing 7067 that was due to leave JFK Airport for L.A. at 9 a.m. A man goes to a party. Among the claims, Manello, and I know the guy, he wouldn't lie. I don't know him. I know his brother. Talked to him at a wedding for three minutes. He's telling me about the grout around his fucking bathroom. Said he learned two box cutters had been found in the first class seat pockets of the plane

parked next to flight 23, which had a tail number one digit off from his. This is, think about this, the people that died on that other plane, just because the fucking dirty Arabs are still using a, what do you call it, a parabus? Parabus? It's a guy out of the Bible, isn't it? Okay, forget it. Making fun of them.

I don't know what you're talking about, my friend. If somebody was on the ground cooperating with them, he says, they just simply made a mistake and put the box cutters on the wrong airplane. Can't even get good help over there. Fuck.

Might as well be Uber Eats. They put the box cutters on the road. Or maybe some white guys are trying to open boxes on that flight. Manello said, claiming it wouldn't be the hardest thing to do back then in the world to plant those, he says. And we got a response um from islam that was the other hand they were playing this music as people were boarding then they looked in the cockpit and they saw a muslim pilot eating a pork chop and crying while he stared at a picture of his ex-wife. Good night, everybody.

Let's listen to some of the people that were involved in this actual thing, including Mr. Manello, the pilot, but some of what I call, you know, the fucking waitresses in the sky. What? Oh, boy. As we deplaned, we made sure lavatories were clear, every row was clear, there was not a person left on that plane. All I saw was a United mechanic waiting for me, and when I opened the door, he says, all right guys, you'll have to get off the airplane. I've been ordered to lock up the airplane. So we did just that.

People on the ground, baggage people or somebody that worked on the ground there, saw people running in the aircraft. I now believe that it is more likely than not that we were the fifth airplane. Nice job, TMZ. I still don't get it, why TMZ's on this. That's kind of creepy, is it not, folks? Oh, come that close to... I knew the first person, supposedly now that they've studied, investigated,

you know, all the flights and what happened, the first stewardess, flight attendant, I should say, to be stabbed to death was a woman named Karen Martin from my hometown of Danvers, who was my sister Donna's best friend growing up. She was supposedly the first person they killed. I wish I didn't like her. I'd make a joke here.

And the hour-long special flight attendants aboard the plane that day share their suspicions about four people in first class. Don't prejudge. Two men, a child, and a person who was dressed in a hijab with the crew actually believing it was a man pretending to be a woman. This was before transitioning folks. Transitioning from a man to be a fucking ugly hijab wearing. I'm kidding.

You're all, actually when a beautiful woman has a hijab on it, why am I trying to talk my way out of this? Fuck them. Pretending to be a woman and a man profusely sweating in business class, which I do if I'm holding a dump from here to L.A. So the guy looked suspicious, but

God forbid somebody, you know, pointed him out, because then you'd be hung by your balls. But the guy said this. Durka, Durka. Muhammad Jihad. So there was another tip-off. Sherpa, Sherpa. Bacala. Bacala.

Ah, God help us. I can't believe how... Anyways. It was odd because it was 8 o'clock in the morning. And airplanes are cold anyways. But it was a cool morning. So why is this dirty, greasy sand sand, you know what, sweating? Sand guy.

That's how you get around being racist. That's my new move by you go the other way so much so that they know exactly what you're going to say. That's my new move. That's my go-to. Then you get on to them because they're the ones thinking it. That's right. That's exactly right. Then you go,

oh, well, get your mind out of the gutter, you N. Were they cool? Flight attendant Sandy Thongren said of the man's supposed perspiration, that was hummus. The flight crew reported struggling to get fruit plates

for their first-class flyers who didn't eat meat, igniting an argument between the passengers and the first class attendant, a woman identified in the documentary as Debra, Debra, Debra, Debra. So she's just trying to hand out fruit plates. And how the fuck... She's got half of the future ISIS sitting and fucking arguing. So she goes, no, they're grapes. And they're like,

Exploding diarrhea. Can you imagine that? And I would always... I flew right after 9-11. I had to go to fucking England. Leaving the country, it was two weeks to do comedy in fucking Manchester, England. And I bombed harder than the fucking Taliban did on 9-11. Man, I went down like fucking, well, I had every other night I would fucking.

I just wish my comedian friends were there to watch, every other night I would fucking, I just wish my comedian friends were there to watch me die, because I'm way funny when I'm dying. I'm trying to curse in an English accent. I went to see where the Beatles started, and it was a big deal. Anyhow, that was that trip. But that's creepy. So people sitting home, that could have been us, that should have been us, or whatever. Another famous person that died?

Well, you guys, you played for the Boston Bruins. His name was Ace Garnett Bailey. Like, Bobby, one of Bobby's closest friends. He was on that flight to L.A. and a horrible day. And we united as a country for about, what, 11 minutes after that happened? And then the fucking left, I'd say two weeks later, started with their horse shit. minutes after that happened. And then the fucking left, I'd say two weeks later, started with their horse shit. Oh, somebody killed a fucking Sikh at a gas station in Arizona. Yeah, some dumb fucking white redneck. That was the only, literally the only like reprisal killing you could say.

And then every day on the news, you you'd hear from you know, Middle Eastern people Oh, we're treated like shit now. Are you fucking kidding me? Put the shoe on the other hijab Made no sense. I'm just saying anyways, it's making me sick. Let's move on to Libs eating lip segment tonight. Oh God more San Francisco? I'm going to have fucking AIDS before this day's out. Oh, Nick, that's a long time ago. Okay, monkey pox, whatever you fucking homos get.

A San Francisco district supervisor is calling for more policing in the crime-ridden city, despite her advocating to defund the police in 20-frickin'-20. You fucking hypocrite. That's right, whore. Hillary, ugh, Ronan. Is that Hillary? Yep. She's showing how to give a blowjob to the judge, who's Dave something.

low job to the judge, Dave something. Hillary Ronan, a Democrat, represents District 9 on the San Francisco Board of Supervisors. Oh, she must be important. How many fucking boards do you have out there? During a Budget and Appropriations Committee meeting on Wednesday, she made an impassioned plea to add more officers to the Mission District, which is, when I was out there in the 90s, in the early 90s, it was kind of gross, which she represents. Well, you're failing miserably there, honey. Ronan was attacking San Francisco police chief for spending a large amount of overtime on anti-retail theft program. So let's blame the cops for a problem being caused by a certain segment of the population that everybody fucking knows and pretend again.

We never, ugh, overtime on an anti-retail theft program instead of prioritizing police presence in her district. Yeah, but you wanted to defund them, you dogface. You need to shut the fuck up again. The fuck's that about? That's all they do is take meetings and they do nothing. I actually thought, well, they did. Back in the day, Kennedy did shit. Politicians get stuffed. Rudy Giuliani, New York City. Okay?

New York City. I lived there. I was down there for a couple years from like 90, no, 90 to 91. Then I went out to L.A. for a year thinking I was funny enough to make a show business. I was back a year later, but when I left New York, there was piles of trash.

I'm not shitting you. Every three feet, there was two squeegee guys on every corner. And whether it was the Bronx, Westchester County, New York City itself, they were squeegeeing. And they'd come up and they'd throw a bucket of diarrhea on your windshield and then want five bucks. So I went out to LA and I came back and I honest to God just the ride I still remember the ride from LaGuardia to my

apartment I'm going where's the garbage? I didn't see a squeegee it was so friggin noticeable he's the only politician I swear my mother made a difference and you know maybe one of the Kennedys and I like Nixon too by the way anyways you open the door to the Chinese how'd that work out anyways I've been begging this department to give the mission what it deserves in terms of police presence all year long Ronan said and I've been told time and time again

to go make a guy a sandwich good fuck you and time time again there are no a guy a sandwich. Good. Fuck you. And time and time again, there are no offices that we can send to mission. Is that the face you used when you asked him? It hurts. Yes, it does. And I feel betrayed by the department. Oh, what a bitch. Here's why fucking men run the world.

I feel betrayed by the mayor. I feel betrayed. Why didn't you say that black bitch just show me that you're alive inside i feel betrayed by the priorities of the city the democratic politician added and then she uh um she added this also and uh yeah that took timing is everything in comedy. The speech contradicts her stance on policing in 2020 after the George Floyd protests. You remember him, right? Black porno star, fucking actually convicted like 12 times

of holding a gun to a pregnant woman star. You know, that guy. Protester Ronan tweeted that she believes strongly that San Francisco's police force needed to be reduced. I want to make it clear that I believe strongly in defunding the police and reducing the number of officers on our force, Ronan wrote. For decades, we've had an imbalance in our city's budget with hundreds of millions of dollars going to SFPD to have them do work they are not qualified to do. Are they ever right about anything? Honest to fucking god. In 2020, Mayor London Breed, yeah I'm sure she got

elected, get the fuck out of here. Here she is about to catch a salmon upstream, redirected 120 million from law enforcement to fund other city initiatives. Crime in San Francisco continued to worsen, with homicides increasing by 20% in 2020 compared to 2019. Homicides also increased 17% in 2021 compared to the previous year. And this bitch, she was all for gutting the police, and now that her section of the city that she's in charge of is a shithole, she's bitching and whining. Your tears are so yummy and sweet.

Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness. Yummy, yummy, you guys. It still makes me laugh. All right, let's move on to, let's lighten up a little sports news. We should do more sports on this. Dallas, we might do, although we don't have time anymore,

but do that idea you have of the half-hour sports where I could actually use foul, racist language. No. That would be the funniest. Anyways. What do we got from today, Josh? Three-point dagger is the headline. Damien Abaz.

Abaz, B-A-U-G-H-S. Three-pointer at the buzzer for Texas Christian University on Sunday night. Didn't beat Gonzaga, but it did cost plenty of bettors by making the final score 84 to 81. Are you interested in the real story? Yes, I am. Tell me more. Of vital importance to the gambling world, Gonzaga, there were four and a half point favorites. Oh boy, I've had this happen

in football. At Circa Sports in Vegas, where me and Tommy have sat, and Tommy better a bunch of games. I can't do it. I get... That's the only thing I get a little compulsive about.

Because if you win, it's like doing a line of blow. Give me another one. At Circus Sports in Vegas, fans reacted as if the shot had won or lost the game. See, because it's filled the sports bet where people bet on Gonzaga, people have the other side. Then you can punch. I would do that. Then you can let out your frustrations, like hit a lady next to you

that was on the other side of you losing your popper running i i think that's allowed in vegas if the shot if the shot had won or lost a game that's how they reacted as it did mean winning or losing for their wallets some gamblers could be seen with their arms raised in triumph while others put their hands on their heads in disbelief. Hunter Salas had made two free throws with 0.7 seconds left remaining to give Gonzaga the number three seed in the West region, an 84-78 lead. Barr, who had 15 points, we don't need all that shit. There it is.

You can see me and Tommy in the back there throwing up. Barr, who had 15 points and 8 rebounds in the game, let the ensuing inbound pass cross midcourt before you pick it up. I know how that works. Then the clock starts. And nonchalantly throws up a three-fucking-pointer.

What's the first clip? Is it the shot? The reaction. This is the reaction when the guy it the shot? The reaction. Oh, the first shot we're going to show you. This is the reaction when the guy hit the three-pointer. Watch the people. Oh, look at this poor white kid. All right.

You can almost smell the depression. Isn't that great? Hold on, killer. Two of those people were found hanging in the presidential suite at the MGM Grand by a belt. Now, here is the scenario that led to those people either celebrating or being disappointed. Check out this nonchalant three-pointer that fucked a lot of gamblers. Go ahead. Oaks are a well-oiled machine offensively.

Nobody's even giving a shit. The Zyga. Back in familiar territory. The Zags make it eight straight. Sweet six. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. How many times? You guys have been there.

Football fans. Dallas, how many times I come in here? I'm just in a pool now like a bitch, but how many times did I come in here? I'm just in a pool now like a bitch, but how many times did I come in here and go, fucking two garbage touchdowns this weekend cost me like winning that week? You guys know what I'm talking about. And everybody in the stands is really there for the game.

I'm sure some people had money on it, but most of them, you know what I mean? I guess if you take the time, I don't know, maybe they did have money on them. Forget what I said the last 10 seconds. My favorite line in The Sopranos ever. They're at a funeral and Tony starts arguing with Uncle Junior. He goes, what's the matter with you, Uncle?

He goes, yeah, you're fucking... He goes, because the sports spec, the book was way up. goes yeah, you're fucking he goes cuz the sports back The book was way up. He goes you're taking credit for shit. You had nothing to do with He goes the economy so good chinks and housewives are betting football Why can't you say that on ABC at 8 o'clock Seriously an adult world Jordan Schult, NFL insider for the score, tweeted, maybe the worst bad beat

I've seen all year. That's a gambling joke. Insane TCU cover. Gonzaga advances to, man, people put up like Twitter videos of them hanging themselves.

Their wife's like, look at my husband down in the basement. I found him behind the boiler. Gonzaga, with his Gonzaga hat on. Gonzaga advances to play number two, UCLA. Now I'm going to start to, well, give me eight more teams out.

The Sweet 16 on Thursday. Well, TCU is, they're headed home. Bye-bye. UCLA has been installed as a one-point favorite over Gonzaga for that game in Vegas. Oh, boy. Hope you learned your lessons. Finally tonight on Meet My Sister.

Low pressure system. Oh, this one. Nothing funnier than somebody getting hurt or falling down or maybe having an aneurysm. How hard did we laugh at the fucking, when Rand Paul's dad, Roger Paul, what the fuck's his name? Look, three guys we don't know. Ron. Remember Ron Paul had a stroke on TV? Guys, you ever see that? You want to laugh till you shit your pants? It's like he was possessed and talking in tongues.

It was so fucking funny. Anyways, this one is just a silent but funny. A Los Angeles CBS meteorologist was hospitalized after fainting on air Saturday in a terrifying moment. Terrifying. I was shitting my pants laughing. That has gone viral on social media. We've seen a few of these. Weatherman Alyssa Carlson Schwartz.

I don't like her already because she kept her maiden name. Boy, she doesn't look healthy right there. That wig is so heavy it's tipping her head. Probably a guy. Weatherwoman Alyssa Carlson Schwartz stunned viewers when she collapsed on live TV after her KCAL co-anchors. That was the funniest part, their reaction. Cut to her for the weather report on rain in Los Angeles. That's a big deal out there.

This week during the 7 o'clock morning. Oh, my God. How many people spit coffee all over the park? Schwartz, who appeared visibly pale. She does not look right there. I got to be honest. Lean forward. Her eyes could be seen rolling to the back of her

head like when I banged my wife. My wife? She seemingly tried to catch herself from falling, but her head slumped down on her big titties. Good night, everybody. No, on her desk before she lost consciousness and fell to the ground. As Warner... Oh, my God. What was his name? Fucking forget it. Let's go to the videotape. Counting at 7 on CBS,

streaming on CBS News Los Angeles, I'm Rachel Camp. And I'm Michelle Medina in for Sheba, who is ready for some sunshine. I know I am. Let's start off with a check of your next weather with meteorologist Alyssa Carlson. She joins us live in the studio.

Alyssa, this really is the calm before the storm. Not again. No. Oh. Hello? You know, we're going to go ahead and go to break right now. Anybody there? Hello?

Hello? Hello? Did you hear the girls? They went, no! Run that again. Oh, my God. Counting to seven on CBS, streaming on CBS News Los Angeles.

I'm Rachel Camp. And I'm Michelle Medina in for Sheba. Who is ready for some sunshine? I know I am. Let's start off with a check of your next weather with meteorologist Alyssa Carlson. She joins us live in the studio. Listen to their reaction to her.

The calm before the storm. Not again. No. You know, we're going to go ahead and go to break right now. All right. He's looking at you, kid. No. That's how girls react to horrible shit in life. Guaranteed Jackie Onassis

when I got her husband's brains and I went, no. No. Oh, my God. I'm going to find out what the hell happened here. I know what happened. She was drinking the night before boning somebody until 5 o'clock and she was dehydrated. That's it, right? Yep.

Okay, kids. That is it for today. What day are we Dallas Refresh my memory on this shit It's Tuesday Are you excited about the big thing with Crowder I am It's going to be great

Did I mention I'm going to fly there like once a month And be in studio for a day or two Probably a day Which means I've added 12 more flights On top of the 20 I bitch about all year already. Really a stupid move. I mean, good for the fans and good for my wife, but I'm so tired of jerking off at La Quinta Inns.

That is it, ladies and gentlemen. Don't forget Cameo.com if you'd like me to roast a friend or relative, go to cameo.com. You guys think it, I'll say it. You're very welcome. We'll see you back here tomorrow. Have a good day. guitar solo Outro Music