The Nick DiPaolo Show - An Illegal Plotted UFC 250 Terror Try | The Nick Di Paolo Show #1912

Episode Date: June 18, 2026

In today's episode Nick talks about The Illegal Mastermind Of Freedom 250, Judge Unloads on Murderer, Sad Titties, F-Bombs In Tennis, Deadly Shoplifting, Women Can't Get Their Fill and A Lucky Bastard Wins Big In Vegas! The FULL SHOW is live streaming & FREE-ONLY on Rumble! Join our LIVE CHAT at 6pm ET every Mon-Thu or watch the FULL EPISODE anytime on demand after 7pm ET. Follow my Channel and get notified! https://rumble.com/c/TheNickDiPaoloShow GET TOUR DATES & TICKETS - https://www.nickdip.com/tour NOVEMBER 5TH - The Punchline: ATLANTA, GA NOVEMBER 6TH - Rivers Casino: PHILADELPHIA, PA NOVEMBER 7TH - Soul Joel's: POTTSTOWN, PA MERCH - Grab some mugs, hats, hoodies, shirts, stickers etc… https://shop.nickdip.com/ PERSONAL VIDEO FROM ME – Send someone a personal video from me! Go to https://shoutout.us/nickdipaolo  or www.cameo.com/nickdipaolo SOCIALS/COMEDY- Follow me on Socials or Stream some of my Comedy!  https://nickdipaolo.komi.io/

was Jimmy and Tommy and me and there was Anthony Stabil Frankie Carbone and then there was Mo Black's brother Fat Andy and his guy's Frankie the Wop Freddie No Knows and then there was Pete the Killer who was Sally Balls his brother and you had Nikki Eyes and Mikey Franchesy and Jimmy two times who got that nickname because he said everything twice like I'm gonna go get the papers get the papers. Welcome to the show. Oh my god. I'm getting like my old man. My old man when he was losing his marbles. Fucking animal shit used to make him laugh his balls and I go

dad it's fake. I don't give a fuck I'm crazy. Um no I'm laughing at this shit but that people are funny man. There's some funny people out there. They're not in comedy clubs on stage. You're doing this shit. How are you folks? Welcome to the live lineup where you get the three stooges and two cucumbers and a fucking whatever. Free shows all day. And if you want to watch ad free, just join Rumble Premium. It's that easy. Don't forget to follow my channel.

Download the Rumble Apollini. Today I'll be talking about, we found out who the genius was, the planned the attack at UFC 250 on Sunday night. Guess what? Not white. We got a judge, an Italian one, of course. still looks good, white hair, probably 78, still has morals and values, and all judges should be, by the way, not fucking broads out of Yale, who sentenced the Gilgo Beach serial killer

and let him have it. It's very good. Also, there's a guy, a tennis guy. As you know, tennis is going on. I don't follow it unless this is my driveway, and it's two co-eds. Anyways, he dropped more F-bombs in one 30-second interview than I have all week. And we've got another genius who's got her kid killed her baby by shoplifting. Hmm, I wonder what, yeah, you know. Anyhow, I'm sure it's the cop's fault. You know what I'm saying to you? Yeah, so that's it.

Red Sox got shut out last night. Oh, my God, these poor pricks. I actually have pangs for their... Worst record at home in the majors. Do you understand it's Fenway? That's a natural home advantage more than most teams have because you build your lineup to fit that park and you play half your season there.

Do you understand that, folks? Even when they suck, they usually have a winning record at home. This is a record that I don't know how many years they said. Also, they're last in the league at home runs. Well, yeah, like I said, you got left field. Yeah, there's a 37-foot wall, and it takes away as many homes as it gives. That's true, too. But load your fuck.

I said it yesterday. I'm sorry to repeat myself. I'm loading my line up with the guys that look like Schwarzenegger and swing righty. And two lefties who know how to hit the opposite field. It's for such high hopes. Oh, my God. Can't get a hit with men on base. It is sad.

Left the house with my teeth in the house. Again, got in the car. Went like 10 feet. That's about it, I guess. Yeah. Oh, the plan, Trump, again, 14-point plan. I'm not going to go over in detail because, like I said, it's going to fall apart like a perfectly cooked smoke shoulder.

So, yeah, I'm not going to go over it. But no, let me tell you something. Huge negative reviews. and I swear to God he does watch Fox and just sort of mimic some of the he's like this is a it's an MOU a memorandum of understanding

it's not the deal but this is why I got to love him he goes it's not the deal but if they don't do well we told them to do I'm going to drop bombs right in the middle of their head he goes right in the middle of their head do you understand and again I'm not going to doubt him he looks silly right now according

Mark Levin who's a huge Trump fan, because Levin's very pro-Jew, obviously, pro-Israel, and nobody's been more as a president, more pro-Israel than Trump. So he loves Trump. He dissected this thing point-by-point, and not like in any of it. And he's a brilliant guy. He's a crumajun, but he's a very fucking smart guy who worked in the Reagan administration. He knows what he's talking about.

He's a Jew. Pretty smart. So he took it apart. A lot of people unhappy. But again, I'm not going to, I think he's earned the benefit of the doubt. Because if they do one thing wrong, because you know Trump, it's his ego now. If they step out of line, he's going to fucking, he just doesn't want, here's my take. Do we have like little nooks that would just take out?

Probably do, right? You know what I mean, folks? Not like Bacardi rum fucking whatever, but a, you know, not 50, what was it called, 51? The one that's half alcohol that we fucking loved in high school before we went driving. But if Trump had his way, yeah, he would melt. But he doesn't want to take out the whole population. You know what I mean? You use those bombs.

You're going to fucking kill the whole population. I don't know why we didn't arm the people over there, you know? And that's what people go, why? Because he's probably listening to and it's like, no, what are you talking about? First of all, Netanyahu would love to see Iran gone. So I don't know. But that's the big beef, you know, people are going, because he's probably listening to his master and all. And no, he's his own guy.

I'm sorry. I'm giving him that much. So we'll see. But I'm not going to sit here and take it apart forever because, like I said, next week by Monday, I'll be saying, did you see the bomb that hit the Dead Comani's wife's house if they stick to their word? Yeah. So you guys can follow up that as much. I read it.

I read it all just to know what's going on. Um, it's very dry. My brother's funny. My brother is a business whiz. Okay. None of us in a family realized, I mean, we know he always knew he was smart, but, you know, he retired, he's been semi-retired almost 20 years now. He's two years younger than me.

And, um, just being by a marketing guy and knowing what to do with his 401ks and his, and he really, because he'll send me texts. He'll be watching Fox business. news or the other version, NBC's business station. The enemy, actually. And he'll tell me, he'll go, they're going to be ranting about this next week as far as the

interest rates go. And here's why they're going to be ranting about it. And they're going to do this until the midterms. And then you turn it on a week later and they're doing exactly what he fucking said. He puts it in a text that none of us can understand. We just send back the nodding emoji. But I would love to, you know, I would

love to, maybe I'll ask Gutfeld. said to him, you gotta be, then I said, you know, you helped to change your last name because they put John Foxx, then he, wait a minute, is that the parlor, the racist, brother? Yeah. So anyways, yeah, I'd like to, you know, I'd like to do a segment here, but that's not what we do here. And you know what? There would be more people than I realize in our audience, because we have a lot of crowd of people, and I'm not even saying my people wouldn't get it, because they're older and they do have, but it's just too dry for this show. You know what I mean? Dallas is too dry, right?

But yeah, he said, he goes, I got the perfect name. What the fuck did he call this show? Buy the Dip, which is fucking great. It's a marketing genius. Should have had him work with me 30 years ago when I was telling people to fuck off at NBC. Anyways, that's that. Who wants to see my brother on the show? I'll make them do dick jokes in between predictions and shit.

It'll be great. Let's get to it, I guess. Yeah, that was the big story this morning. Mexican wrestling is a thing, right? They wear those masks and shit. The headlines are Mexican wrestling. The alleged ringleader that we just talked about a little bit of the explosive drone attack plot against the UFC event at the White House

is an illegal immigrant from where? Mexico. That's old school illegal. You know I mean? That's like original Corona. The Department of Homeland Security said Thursday, excuse me, Abraham Alvarez,

that makes no sense. A juice pick. 31 years old, seen here on the wall at supercuts. You can get this haircut called the dumb grease bowl. Came to the U.S. as a child and failed to leave the country when his B-2 visa expired in 2001, but was granted deportation

relief under who, folks? That's right, the Marxist cocksucker and his boyfriend, Barack Obama. Do you see what he's done to the country? Him and anybody succeeding him, the Democrat, as like in Biden, through deferred action, childhood arrivals, you remember that? Daca, as we say, Boston. Fucking darker. He's darker than I am at the end of the summer. Alvarez was one of five alleged co-conspirators in the scheme to kill President Trump and other top government.

He was the brainchild. You wonder why it failed. At the combat sport spectacle held Sunday on the White House South Lawn, attended by thousands of fight fans, right? Authorities told the outlet that Alvarez was responsible for planning, organizing, and directing the coordination. attack, and that's why his country's a shithole. People like him are considered

bright. That was thwarted by the... Can you imagine this knucklehead and his five pals going up against Patel? But you know what? It only takes one. It only takes one. That's the thing about these guys. You know, I know it's a cliche, but the FBI has to be

perfect all the time. These guys perfect ones. This illegal alien from Mexico should have never been allowed in our country. Who said that? Department of Homeland Security, Acting Assistant Secretary. Make me a coffee. Lauren Abyss, BIS. Holy shit, that's a real name.

What abyss. Here she is. Seen with her hair hanging down. He was the ringleader of a failed terror attack targeting UFC Freedom 250. He will face justice. This is what the lady says. And swiftly be

removed from our country. She added, and I say personally, there's only one way to handle this guy and to start doing it with other people. But this scene came to mind the minute I thought of it. You know how I am? I take in reality, news stories. I bounce right to TV and movies because they represent life.

That's what art does. But this is what you do to this guy. You should do this with the fucking view. It'll be no good though. For those of you who are young, too young to watch those, hadn't seen those movies, which most of these of my, probably, but good, bad, ugly, fucking pale writer. I mean, yeah, any of those Clint Eastwood movies, they made a whole shit load of them.

And they're just good movies. Because if you know anything about art as far as film, TV, or stories, you've got to have a conflict. You've got to have a protagonist, antagonist. That started in Greek times when they were putting on plays and shit. Okay? That's what it starts. And this shit, no lines are drawn more clear than a Western movie with the bad guy and the good guy. Although this one was great because they kind of muddled it.

They almost became friends. What's it? Eli Wallach, right? Eli Wallach plays a Mexican, and he's just tremendous. They should do a remake and get Carlos, what's the comedian who steals? What? That'll be the plot line. Anyways, watch those movies, and especially the Unforgiven,

which is so scary. That came out about 25 years ago. And Clint was old, and it was about an aging guy. That's my favorite, by the way. And I love them all. I could watch them all 12 times. Tori, November 5th, Punchline, Atlanta, Georgia, the 6th. That's the next night, River Casino, Philly.

And then the next night after that, November 7th. sold Joel's pot Sampier, go to Nick Dip.com to get your tickets before they sell out, and they might. I haven't been around in a while. You know how that could work. And go to the merchandise page at Nick Dip.com. We have a bust of me up in the corner you can get. 4495. It's made of Gouda cheese. True story. You got the fucking things you can shit in. You can have your grampy shit in it or your cat. Either way. Then you got the teeth to eat it. and there's my pelvis right now. What's in the middle of that pelvis?

Oh, is it? I see, I thought it was a little mouse with ears. That's what it looks like from here. Anyways, buy some of that shit. Keep me on the air, if you want to call this the air. Anyways, we had hats and hoodies and underwire bras and shotguns. Also, want to send a personalized video to someone, you know, where I can give them a pep talk or roast them or say hello or slap them across the ass.

Where do you do that? At shoutout.us. That is true. Let's move on. Hey. Kasset each. Come and so far. Judge unloads on Gilgo Beach serial killer.

And I knew the guy was a sick fuck, and I knew he had a kill room, he called it. Downstairs in his... That's what bugs me about these guys. They're good with their hands, too. They can do better shit than me with their hammering nails. I mean, other than banging him into a hooker's head, they know how to make shit. What a big, can you imagine, though, and these girls were petite.

He even had that in his notes, go after the small ones. He's a hulking, scary looking fuck. And can you imagine the terror? And he didn't just kill some of these girls. He kept them around for a while when his family was out of town and tortured him before he killed them. Anybody, would anybody object to throwing gas on this guy on national TV? Let's say the 4th of July. Just pour gas all over them, flip a match, watch them. Do what they do with the terror, which is creep. The worst one, those terrorists, when they put you in the cage,

then dump gas on you, and they make a nice long trail of gas, and they stand fucking 50 yards away. Do that to him. That might be a deterrent, you know? Long Island serial killer, I call him T-Rux, Hureman, chillingly told a disgusted judge, I am responsible before he was sentenced to three life terms behind Barr. And again, you know me, I'm more for the life sentence than I am for the chair or whatever,

only because, and to back up my point, somebody who, I saw the headline, I didn't read it, because what am I real? but somebody said, oh, it was a former prisoner said he'll get thrown to the wolves. A prisoner or a prison warden. Somebody said he'll probably get thrown to the wolves, a guy like this. But don't do it too quickly. Have your fun with him like he did with the girls.

Uelman was in Suffolk County Court Wednesday after admitting to the savage murders of eight sex workers between 1993 and 2010. Wow, it was right. 17 years. And he got caught. Remember fucking pizza crust Fucking pizza, see Should have stayed on that fucking low carb diet It would have been fine

You fat fuck yeah He had to first listen to victim Impact statements for more than a dozen relatives of the women he strangled And butchered One of the women, I don't think I showed The clip, a woman's sister Who was murdered

Goes and he was calling the sister And going, yeah, I got her, your sister's here. I raped her. This is what she said. It was on TV. You called me and said, talking about my sister. I raped her in the ass. You should have seen the look

on her face. That's burning him alive, that would be too good. Who asked the, so anyways, Judge Timothy Mazzy, look at him. Looks like right out of a, doesn't he look out of a 70s movie with Pacino's the, you're out of order. The courts are. Look at him.

Fucking picture of health. That guy's going to be 110. Full head of hair. So anyways, he faced the judge who asked the six foot four former architect if he had anything to say before sentencing, then ordered him to stand up while addressing the court. There are no words I can say, but I am responsible for what was said today, Hewomen said. The words I would have, he said, the words I would have no meaning, and I'm going to leave it there at this time, which is true. Someone from the crowd yelled,

speak up before Macy unloaded on the killer. The judge said, Mr. Hulman, he said, as Suffolk County District Attorney, Ray Tarnie said, I know that you're sorry you got caught. As I said, barely containing his disgust

with the sicko. Oh wait a minute we have the clip Oh is it So I'm not reading what he said So you're sorry for what you did to your wife and children Are you a little bit sorry for what you did to these poor innocent women Eight women you strangled to death At least eight women that we know of

Are you at least a little bit sorry about that The judge then unloaded on the Gilgo Beach killer Like this You know what You've been described as a very big man. But you're a disgusting and despicable small man

if you're a man at all. And you're a coward. And he started, he was like tearing up the job. And I love that he ended it with, they didn't have it, but it said it in the paragraph, get him out of here. Like the guy did. Remember in Scarface when they're interrogating Tony?

I seen a lot of these assholes. Get them out of here. The crowd erupted in cheers with summon attendance chanting, let's go Knicks. No, ogre, ogre. As Hewomen was cuffed behind his back. Hewomen confessed to killing eight women between 93 and 2010 and dumping their broken bodies along desolate stretches of Long Island

where they were found starting back in December of 2010. So they were dead for a while. That's why it took so long to fucking identify some of them. But like I said, a couple of them that he took home and tortured. What a piece of fucking. That's why, you know, and again, I'm like heaven and hell does it exist? Then when I hear this shit, I go, it has to.

This guy can't be going. At least if there's a heaven. If there's a heaven, there must be a hell, and that's where he's got to, I'm going to be sitting next to my mother up in heaven. I won't either, but that's not the point. That's not the point, okay? Fuck. We got any lines from this show yet?

No, I... Get you, bastard. You son of... That's not it. You just don't want to do the editing. And I don't blame you. No, I know, but I can see. I also know when you're fucking being picky. Come on, I had a couple in there. Don't tell me. I do this for a little. Don't tell me my business, boy. I know, I haven't exactly done fire, but your energy's a little low, too. Remember the joke's as good as you laugh. Oh my god. You're saying I'm doing pee-wee-Herman shit?

You sounded like Kermit. By the way, Pee Wee Herman, holy fuck. I found a clip of him. I don't think anybody's seen. He had just started to get a little famous. And he kept saying it was a live performance of a live audience.

Fucking guy was a fucking genius with that character. He turned into that guy. And when anybody, like, wouldn't laugh at a joke he'd get this hurt look on his face like fucking nerds do. Oh my God. I'm fucking crying. Yeah.

Anyways. And by the way, he whacked off in a theater. He didn't touch no kids. I watched a documentary. And I really believe that. Do you feel a... Oh, what am I saying? Best headline of the day. I got the Tiddy Blues. Wasn't that a tomb by Muddy Waters or one of those guys from Mississippi?

Do you feel a sense of impending doom when your nipple is touched? I don't know, just the opposite. If it's not my wife. I'm hysterical. Yeah, put that one. in there and get me hanged. You get a sense of doom? This whole article. This is such horseship, but it's funny. These are perfect for the show, by the way. I don't know a girl who would get a sense. Apparently this broad does. Whoever wrote it, somebody touches your nipple, it's a good

thing. Even the broads, you know, they're a stapler gun and they're putting horseshoes in it and fucking old, you know what, shell casings. She's a hot black one. You're not alone. Online and known as sad nipple syndrome. Hey nipple, what's the matter? You seem down in the dumps. Look at that. I wanted to help this girl with this picture and they're like, get out of it. I said, I'm a director. I did some shit for comedy, they go, get out of here. The fuck out of here. What's the fuck out of here? What's the matter with you? It's when the nipple gets brushed by someone or something in Central Park and the guy's got no shirt on. And a wave of intense negative emotion washes over. Again, it's never happened to me. Not even when I touch my own.

Well, maybe a little bit. Then it's like, oh, I'm jerking off again. Fucking loser. Descriptions range from the deepest pit in my stomach to deep and unexplainable, overwhelming sadness and guilt, even homesickness. I think your tit needs a shrink. You know that? That's right. Shrink your tits. So why is the nipple doing double duty as the button of despair? There's a fucking phrase. What the fuck? Play the video because I don't even remember what it is. Yeah, she was in the story. She gets sad. Maybe it's the music you put under your Instagram.

They're bumming you out. You know who that looks like, Greta Thunberg's little sister. Look at that. And let me tell you something. And I like, I'm not an old guy with that shit. I like the facial jewelry. But that one, that's a C that stands for c. Because I've never met one.

Even the ones that I, you know, talk to or whatever, bartenders and shit. and they're kind and nice, unless they have that, then boy, are they fucking high and mighty on their feminist whoreshit. I can take the baby shots in the face. Sad nipple syndrome could be related to a well-known condition that affects women who are lactating. Bon Appetit.

Of course. Of course. Some breastfeeding patients experience a sudden wave of sadness. You know, if my mother read this, she'd be going, What? Shut the fuck up. My mother breastfed me, and she was an alcohol. She drank while she was pregnant. She liked her booze.

When she breastfed me, she put salt around the rim of her nipple. Teaching early. Look at me today. So listen to this horseshit, wave of despair right before the milk releases. Well, I get sad right before my, after I release my milk, I'm sad. So it works different with your dick. Said Dr. Melissa Walsh. and OB, G-Y-N-I-O-L-Y-Molly?

What the fuck? Now, why does my proctologist look like that? Blowing right in your face. Very pretty. It's a dangerous situation. I'm sorry. I was thinking of Tony Sopran. I'm talking to Meadows, black, Jewish boyfriend.

It came across my feed today. So we understand each other. Your charcoal Burkette, did soon. What the fuck's your problem, man? He goes, I think you know what my problem is. Pokes the kid to chest. Now, I don't know what your little friend was thinking when she brought you in here, but she didn't do you any favors.

So now you're going to say, thank you. It was nice to meet me and leave. Oh, my God. Fucking show makes me hotter. Hatter. Anyway, she's an OB, G, Y, Ann. Boy, I'd fucking pay money to watch her checking out of her patients. Ouch.

Hey, that's a new... That should be a new category on porn. Who do I call? Ron Jeremy. He's in jail for life. Chief Medical Director, the maternal health company, simply fed?

Am I reading that right? Sounds like a stadium in San Diego. There you go. That's where the Rams and the charges play. Simply fed. It's a condition called dysphoric milk ejection reflex. Again, that's the same as jerking off. When milk releases, the brain triggers a surge of octetoxin.

Who is making this shit up? I'd like to... All right, I'll come in, and you know what? And we'll test out your theory. I'll shoot it right in your face. the hormone responsible for moving milk out of the breast. Like it works for a name a moving company. Mayflower?

Dopamine, listen to this, folks. I just don't believe any of this shit. Dopamine, known as the body's feel-good molecule, can drop sharply at the same moment that you release milk. That dip in dopamine helps prolactin, the hormone that drives milk production, increase. Yes, and then when you have that crash, that's why cocaine exists.

exists. Snort a couple lines and that dopamine will kick right back in. This physiological reflex, not a psychological response, she emphasizes, it's the brain responding to hormones released from a physical event. What, like wrestling? Not a thought or a memory. That's what differentiates D. Demer.

That was a rapper from Canada, wasn't it, Demer? That's what differentiates DEMER from postpartum depression or general. Anxiety, which are both present. Women who aren't and have never breastfed are reporting remarkably similar feelings. Yeah, you know why? Doctor, who's what, 22? Because they read nonsense like this. Nobody mentioned this until you wrote this fucking article.

Now they're all going, hey, she's right. My nipples are sad. Shut the fuck. I'll make them happy with a bick lighter. What the fuck? was that? Well, I was channeling Rex Eurman. One study shows that the oxytoxins, I did made that up. I don't want to say the real name, oxytocin. Have you had the oxytocin? Have you had the oxytocin? Surge is when the nipple is stimulated, either with a blowtorch

or pliers, said Rex Eurman. This raises a biologically plausible, though as yet unstudied. Well, then, write the article then once it's studied. Question about whether the same dopamine mechanism maybe at play in women who have never breastfed. No, what's at play is your, again, your words on the internet. You motherless. It's also possible in non-lactating women that this is a psychological phenomenon. Yeah, crazy bitches. So what you just said with the last two sentences made your article, it's like when they go,

you know, this pill may cure cancer. Oh, you get some cold medicine Oh, is a... Make me a sandwich. Make me a fucking sandwich. Hey! How'd you do that? You've had the skill the whole time?

I just played our segment because it fit perfectly. Who segment? What do you mean? Make me a sandwich segment. No, but you have other sound drops on there? No, it's not a drop. I just didn't show you the segment. Because usually I could just do it.

Oh, I get you. I get you. The thing that ain't to do it. This is a segment? Very good. But it worked as a sound draw. I'm going to work on that this weekend. And you know what that'll mean?

I'll fucking be my bedroom from now to. Even Andy said, oh, fuck it. Hey, I'll do it. In between practicing my guitar. I'm 14, by the way. Anyways, I tried to walk around Forsyth Park yesterday. You know, this is, I used to laugh at people that walked and called that exercise. I'd go, oh, that's so fucking silly.

If you don't get your heart right through the roof, you didn't exercise. That was my, but see, now that my joints are giving way. And by the way, this GLP shit, you know what a lot of it does? It fucking eats your muscle away, too. This can't be good. But like I said, I'm 64. I've never felt better. My cholesterol's down.

Fucking, every blood pressure is normal except for yesterday. It was a little high or two days ago. When did I go to the cardiologist? and here's me doing a, you know, black nurse takes my blood pressure and it was a little high and I go, she goes, well, do you have a white coat syndrome? I say, yeah, but you're black.

Just like that. And the fucking eyes got this big and then she laughed. See, that's how you, seriously, that's how we could bond with each other. She's like, I ain't never heard that. I said, you ain't never met a motherfucker like me. Then I called her aunt your mom.

I went too far. She threw a clipboard of my head. And they said, you have to leave. No, but I did. I go, yeah, but you're black. She fucking, it was so funny. It was like a TV show. She didn't pick up on her.

And then she went, boing. You know, like the guy in the kitchen on the three stooges when all the water pipes are braced. I need water. I need water. Turn on anything. You get it. All right, folks. Let's move on to watch your fucking mouth. Watch, not wash.

which I heard probably 20 times a day when I was a kid. Queens is one of tennis traditional grass court stops in London before Wimbledon, which made this scene even more unexpected. Muté, I bet you're I'm saying that right. Mute. There he is. I had just survived METCII Perricard. Boy, you're really busting my balls here.

One of the sports biggest servers, I think they're both Frenchies. When the BBC interviewed Jenny Drummond, oh, thank God. asked him about facing, listen to this, Dallas, 142 mile an hour second serve on Matt. So this guy that he's playing is known for his rockets. And, you know, that's the equipment too, by the way. And they were complaining about it a few years ago, 15 years ago. They're going, the equipment's getting too good.

Guys, you see how fast a 100 mile an hour pitch is. And they're not much further, you know what I mean, right? 142 and you got to return it that I want to I just want to see what that's like stand out there put on pads and have them blast a serve at me just to see and they return it it it's starting to get like those you know the real Chinese that play ping pong they blast it and they volley for 20 minutes and you're like what BBC interview Jenny Drumman asked him about facing the 142 mile per hour second serve on match point and it was a very entertaining interview to say the least take it away jenny 142 mile an hour second serve how tough is it to return that that's so frustrating you know

when i had a match point i was on the second serve okay you aim in the middle whatever you do you just put the ball in the court and then he hates me at 142 i was like fuck i would have to serve and i would have to no f-bombs please fuck fuck fuck no no no no Right, Corantan, I'm going to ask you one more question. Apologies, everyone, for the language there. I'm going to ask you one more question, so please keep it clean. Okay, Mom. You on the grass, last week, unfortunately, didn't go your way.

What's it like to get your first victory? Fuck, fuck, fuck. Okay. Corantan, we need to improve that for the next round. Apologies, everyone. Corintam Muti. My new favorite tennis player. Is that childless?

Yes. Yes, it is. Is it funny? Yes. Yes, it is. He probably wouldn't have actually done that. I know. She's not even addressed it.

I know it. You're going. If she let the first one slip. Yeah, if she let it go by. Guys, you know, first of all, if you're a comic, everybody knows that about a comic. Sometimes a club owner. I told me and Geraldo were doing a gig at,

what's the college that fucking, how he long went to? Villanova. You know, Catholic. school, private, and they're like, you know, before the show, there's two women giving us a 20-minute lecture on, don't, you know, don't curse and shit. Don't do pedophile pre-shed. I'm up there about five minutes, not doing that well. So I go right into about an eight-minute chunk on pre-fucking kids. And while I'm up there, I watch the lady who is talking about, she'll

drawl those on this side of the back of the, she goes over there and stands next to them with her arms folded, and she's going like this. yes and then Gerald was pissed at me because when we got done they wouldn't give us a check ah they mailed it a couple days later you don't ever it really is and we're not doing it be wise guy

it's just that fucking nature and that guy's got some of that in them but of course all the comments were like what a childish thing to do there's kids in the yard shut the fuck up your kids are going to go home and go on the internet and watch a girl getting banged by three fucking guys.

All right. Anyways, it's language. He doesn't look very masculine there, though, I'll tell you. Look at that picture. The fuck is that. The bearded lady returns 140. BBC present their Claire balding.

I wonder if she shaves. Later apologized to viewers from the studio. Moutette seemed to take the moment in stride afterward commenting on the tournament's Instagram post that he had been joking. Well, yeah, we know that, Frenchman. I was just joke in. I hope you guys did not get offended.

Moutette wrote, thanks for the love. The ATP could still find Muteh, as players can be punished for audible obscenities well on site. What a fucking European fags. Still the moment, I shouldn't say that, they'll punish her over here too. Still the moment added some unexpected comedy

to what was otherwise an impressive grass court. He won, by the way, for the 27-year-old who found a way to pass one of the biggest serves in tennis at one of the sports main Wimbledon warm up event. It's a warm up event. You should be able to say, fuck all you want. By the way, that's why John McEnroe,

and I guarantee you, these fuckers all know who he is. I don't care how young they are. They know their sports history. John McEnroe started all that bad boy shit. And I actually liked it because John McEnroe is a spoiled rich brat from Long Island, which made it even more irritating. He was from a, you know, a well-to-do family,

and he's from a rich part of Long Island. He was a spoiled brat. And he would fucking... You gotta be fucking kidding me! He'd go to the judge's face and the announcers had never seen that before. That's the beauty of the First Amendment and when the Americans use it right,

I know and you're saying, well, Nick, now what are you saying? You think cursing? I do. It's really my only vice. I drink a little bit, but not the point what you're going to call me an alcoholic. I didn't fucking, I did Coke in the 80s. That's not nothing.

But cursing, fourth grade, third grade. great, getting in trouble for cursing. Mrs. Winnioski, I was in love of them. My third grade teacher told my mother had a dirty mouth. Third grade. What are you, nine? Eight, nine? I hung out with my sister, Darlene's friends. They were all four or five years older to me.

They'd always come to play when they wanted to play football because I got run like the fucking went. And I'd listen to them. And go home, you know, nine years old. These potatoes fucking blow. What? Ping, tang, pang. Let's move on to Sharpley.

This thing turns deadly. Sounds like a black parenting event. The Walmart in Sanitobia. It's my screen name. Sanitobia. Excuse me? The Walmart and Sanitobia reopened Wednesday morning following protest. Outside that, oh, this is in Mississippi, by the way. Outside the result, it resulted in tear gas being deployed Tuesday night. So once again, we have unhappy black people because of an event. a cop-related shooting and, you know, it's the same all fucking story and it's sad, don't get me wrong. Here's the story. They're my baby,

this is all we want. Just for my baby, this is all we want. Translator. Justice for my babies. I'm guessing that's the dad. He's saying, no, you're right. Everybody's there, baby.

Probably talking about his girlfriend. a whole different thing. Yeah, justice for my baby, that's all we want. See, it's not that simple. You fucking knuckleheads. In Mississippi, no offense, dumbest state in the union by a thousand. Reading at about a fourth grade level,

it's fucking scary. Anyways, this is what happened. The Walmart was a scene of a deadly shooting involving the Sanitobia police in which a one-year-old boy was killed and a woman critically injured when officers opened, fired, at the suspected shoplifters in the parking lot.

You're going, they're shooting at somebody just for shop, now there's fucking more. Tuesday night, protests gathered outside the store following a meeting of the mayor and board of Alderman. A Walmart spokesperson sent a statement on the matter were saddened by what took place at our Sanitobia Mississippi store. The safety of our associates and customers

is a top priority. You know what? When you put this boilerplate shit out every time, it says just the opposite. We can't even come up with the original words. We don't have time. So what? Someone got whacked. How'd we do in the third quarter with the fucking plastic sheets, whatever?

There's a top... We're working with law enforcement as they continue investigating. The Mississippi Bureau of Investigation, that'll be the NBI, says this is all started with a shoplifting call at Walmart on Sunday, according to MBI. when officers saw two women and a child leave the store and jump into a car.

They attempted to stop the car. The cops did. However, the driver allegedly drove into an officer's direction trying to hit him. And I believe that a million percent, number one, because he's a cop, number two,

because it's being done in Minneapolis and being defended by the left and the media. Right? That's what people do. Cop bad, me good, cop white, me, me good, he bad. MBI says at least one officer fired a shot, but the car continued to take off. There's got to be footage, by the way. Yes, Walmart.

Exactly. You know, they sponsor the ID network. Every person that gets, I keep forgetting to write this bit, Dallas. ID Network. I swear to God, Walmart sponsors it. They should. Every other crime on the ID Network murder the guy, a woman, gets busted. buying a shovel and lie, you know, at the garden center in Walmart at three in the mother.

Family later identified, and this is a tragedy. Don't get me wrong, folks. But it's bigger than, you know, I mean, you have to read into it. Identified one-year-old Cohen Wiley, K-O-H-E-N, who was inside the car, was shot in Russell the Hospital where he died from him. Absolutely horrible. There's no doubt about it. The officer who fired the shots has been placed on leave pending an investigation.

Attorney Ben Kromp, who is a race baited to the 10th power. He's the new L. Sharpton is representing the family. MBI is still investigating the incident. The point being, yes, it's absolutely a tragedy. Nobody would disagree with that. But it wouldn't have happened if you're not trying to steal shit. Well, Nick, you don't know that yet. They haven't done.

Yes, I do. Yes, I fucking do. Yes, I do. I'll put my life on it. Okay? And that's the point. Guarantee there's no dad in the kid's picture. Kid might even be better off.

Sad to say it sounds horrible. But growing up with, you know, you steal it, really? Take my kid. And look what happened. Again, right versus wrong, law, this is, and somehow it's the cop's fault. Now, if they show the footage, I'm trying to be fair here. If I show the footage and the lady was like going two miles an hour,

okay, then you might have a point. point. But I doubt that very much. Because even the fucking media health care be calling me. What do they want? I didn't have an appointment today, did I? Oh, shit. I did. Papsmear. Motherfucker. Anyways. Have you had the pap smear at the bagel shop?

Anyways. Anyways, rest in peace, little guy. And honest to God, I don't know what your situation was. I bet you wasn't good. It was going to be a struggle for you. Again, nobody looks at what caused it, and they just focus on the cop, and he's horrible. Let's move on to Can't Get My Fill when I'm on the pill. You know, it's so funny, I picked these so long ago. I can't remember.

I mean, yesterday, my memory's something. For millions of women, the sudden urge to polish off a pint, oh, here we go, of ice cream or demolish an entire bag of chips. You don't have to be abroad to do that, by the way. I did that last night. Can feel impossible to explain. Let me explain it for you. You're a hungry fat buck.

I get the munchies again. I got the GLP and me, but I don't know. Maybe I've got to kick it up a notch. Anyways, now new research suggests a widely used medication maybe playing a bigger role than previously thought. Oh, that's my dentist calling. That's all I'm going to say about that. Hadn't heard for him in quite a few weeks.

Anyways, a study published in JAMA, have you, Jammer, found that women were significantly more likely to binge eat on certain days and the trigger wasn't stress, bad moods or other Medicaid. Of course not. It's not the woman's fault. She's fat. It never is. Every commercial, when you want to lose the, you just had a kid and you want to lose that extra.

There's always an excuse. It's never you just fucking eat too much. Every guy's just a fucking slob, beer drinking, pretzel eating. Yeah. And we admit it. But you have to, you know. Instead, researches discovered a hormonal connection that could help explain why some women experience powerful food cravings and episodes of overrated. We all do, by the way.

Now, that sandwich looks delicious, by the way. God damn it, lady. The culprit they found is, I don't like, by the way, I don't like lettuce on my sandwich. I think that's overrated. Is none other than combined oral contraceptives, better known as the birth control pill. There we go. So when you have a baby, that's why you're fat. When you do something not to have a baby, it's why you're fat.

Combined oral conceptives are the most commonly prescribed form of hormonal contraception. And is used by 85% of the whores, I mean women out there, at some point in their lives. Who said that? It was a study in 2012 done by a couple of fat chicks. Research has tracked 422 women's ages 15 to 30 from mission. State University twin registry. Over 49 consecutive days. Wow, what a big sample size.

Two months and a half. Roughly two menstrual cycles. Roughly two menstrual cycles, one skateboard and a unicycle. Good night, everybody. I, but Dad bought me a menstrual cycle. He couldn't put it together on Christmas Eve. Did he take it out on the family? Dad, there's blood on the seat. Shut up, son. participants also recorded their daily use of active and active birth control pills,

along with episodes of overeating. The study found that binge eating increased on days when women were taking birth control pills compared with days they were taking inactive or placebo pills. Yeah, let's see. It's okay, honey. We'll come back tomorrow. Fuck that. I need me a number two meal now. The doors came this way. That's hilarious.

You know what? It made it even look because that's how heavy she is. They went, she blew them open. God, this shit's funny. I know it's going to destroy us, but let's have some laughs on the way out the door. Notably, the association remained even after researchers accounted for factors that could influence eating behavior, including being undisciplined fat pig, including negative moods, and use of other medication.

Well, you're not blaming it on your husbands? Research has observed another intriguing trend. As participants continue documenting their eating habits throughout the study, binge eating episodes generally declined. Yeah, that's called counting calories. We've been doing it forever. Yeah, you write it down. And you go, oh my God, did I really eat that much?

Yeah. So once again, another study that was perfect for the show, but wasted everybody else's time. That bread is, I'd fuck that bread. I wouldn't even eat it so delicious. The findings suggest that simply tracking behavior may help some women. Yes, counting calories. Become more aware of eating patterns and regain a sense of control.

Yeah, exactly. Thanks for telling us nothing in 20 minutes. The women who, they should carry the thing like an umpire does. Little clicker. Every time they eat something. That was silly, don't you think, folks? Anyways, let's end the week with an uplifting story. Free Mexican babies fell out of a helicopter into a volcano yesterday.

Oh my God. No, this is called Lucky Bastard. How about this, folks, boy. A visitor from Atlanta, Georgia, won a staggering. Are you sitting down $10,292,912, jackpot at the Westgate Las Vegas Resort in Kassad. I played one of these places. It's so fun.

There was one year where I was playing, you know, MGM Grand, those, not the big rooms, obviously, but they have beautiful rooms. And we'd be doing those and, like, they'd booked me on the way out. I'd do that on a Saturday night, on a Sunday night, go out and you hit one of those, what's the one that has the word gold in it, gold rush or whatever? There's a whole chain of them like outside of Vegas, and you do those. And they were great. Say anything you want to drunk people who are broke. Anyways, the lucky guess, listen to this, folks, hit the massive prize on an IGT megabucks wolf-run eclipse slot machine.

I know. Let me guess it was made in California by 400 fucking committees. Slot machine after playing for only three minutes and placing a $5 wager. Did you hear what I just said? Played the machine for three minutes, $5 bet, returned 10 mil. and this is why I was voted class pessimists and I'm so negative in life. First thing I went to is how about the person

that played it before him? And got up. Him or her got up just a little early. And you know what? They know. They saw this story. If they went to this casino, they saw this story.

And I'm guaranteed they're hanging in the basement by a rope right now. Can you fucking imagine? I was telling, and I've told this before, on this. I was playing either. It was, it was Vegas. I was playing Vegas. Catch a Rising Star. They had a beautiful room there. I, uh, I, I was playing the slots after Saturday a night show. And I, I go to sit down at a slot machine and this, uh, older lady, like, pretty old, late 60s. I was in my fucking 40s, maybe. Maybe all the, our ass is bumped. We,

I didn't see her. She didn't see me. So I give her the seat. And I take the machine next to her, third or fourth pull, $2,500. They found her body out in the desert. And they had my Timberland tracks. Anyway, that's a true story. Banged asses, I let her have the seat. So the rest of the weekend, I was flattening old people, the ones with oxygen tents and fucking,

those are the people who play the slots, by the way. And one time I was playing catch again, MGM Grand, and in between shows. And I was playing a $5. a slaughter or $2, whatever. I was up, $750. And I was on a roll. I was going to say, and the fucking, I had to go up for the show.

The first five minutes of that show, boy, was I testy. The win at the off-strip casino features several notable details. Machine type. This is for you guys. Write it down like it's ever going to happen again this century. IGT megabucks, the network famous for its multi-million dollar payouts in Nevada. The game's called Wolf Run. If you don't believe me, there it is.

Check it out. Duration. The grand prize was triggered after just three minutes of gameplay, which I mean, you know there was somebody sitting there for two hours right before that. Fucking went home naked. Winners' identity, the newly minted multi-millionaire has chosen to remain completely anonymous. A lot of people, you know who they think it is? That's right, Nancy Guthrie.

Scale of the win. Westgate management confirmed this is one of the largest slot jackparks ever awarded at their prop. One of, with 94.98% RTP. This slot promises low volatility bonuses and straightforward winning combinations, making it ideal for players seeking quick and regular wins. Yeah, either that, there's a guy who's from the Gambino family sitting up there in front of a computer and goes, Oh, what is this? 2026 here. We got to let them have one, right? Estimates from gaming experts.

Listen to this. The odds of that, around $1.49.8 million per spin, as they say. And I used to say, well, how do you think Vegas got so beautiful? Not because they were losing. Every time you go there, they're throwing up a new fucking in. What's funny about it is back in the 50s when it was really a great place. everybody dressed up and shit. It was being run by the mob.

So you guys are throwing money into machines that mobs. Jaden has one dollar bill, one quarter, and two pennies. How much money does he have? Jayton broke. Alice! What the fuck?

How did you think of that? And I'm glad you did. Please put... You got a list? I don't know if you have a file. Put that at the top. Can you play that again? That kid.

kid is going to grow up to be a rape. No, how cute is this kid? Jaden has one dollar bill, one quarter, and two pennies. How much money does he have? Jayton broke. Oh my God. That kid's probably 18 now. That's a good way to end it. Holy Christ. For the week, too, by the way. Hey, don't forget camio.com if you want me to roast a friend or a relative. excuse me, go to cameo.com. Are you guys thinking I'll say it? You're very welcome. I hope you have a great weekend

with your friends and family or whoever you hang out with and we'll see you back here on Monday. Take care of yourselves, everybody. Hi, good night, everybody.