The Nick DiPaolo Show - Biden Spits on 9/11 Families | Nick Di Paolo Show #1607

Episode Date: August 1, 2024

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about More Crooks video, Trump's savior, Terrorists win and more! Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

["Sweet Home Alone"] What the hell's wrong with you? You look like a Puerto Rican whore. What are you talking about? Hey folks, welcome to the show. Let me take a sip of... Did you say Sanka? Oh, love it. I thought you were too young for that.

Everybody knows this. Is that still around, Sanka? Oh, yeah. Fuck it. I bet it is. Tab is still around. You remember the soft drink, Tab? Fucking mother always had that.

Everybody had a Tab. All her...she had a tiny ass. I wasn't looking at my had a tab all her she had a tiny ass I wasn't looking at my mother's arms say she was petite lady but then our friends would have me drink a tab and they fucking look like Lizzo how are you folks great to be here the Antichrist you got me in a vendetta kind of mood you don't see that movie soon I'm firing you That'll be your fucking your Tarantino fan. I am. Oh dude. This is a fucking masterpiece. Was that a true romance? Yeah, yeah, I've seen it. Oh Well, I just asked him he said no no you said if you don't see it

Hmm It is a terrific film folks I love it. It is a terrific film, folks. James Gandolfini, little cameo in that, and he's fucking as scary as a... I really like What's Your Name? I have no memory, let's not talk about movies. Brian and that Peters. Arquette, one of the Arquette sisters, the blonde one with the snaggle tooth. She is so good in that.

And she, is that Roseanne? No, it's the other one. It's the other Arquette. I don't give a fuck. It doesn't matter. She's the one that was in that. And she's in this movie about, remember a few years ago, Upstate New York, there was a prison and this ugly woman that worked there was fucking one of the couple of the guys and broke him out and they were

like being hunted for a week they made a movie about that she plays the woman she put on like 60 pounds to do it dude it's the best it's the best trail I've ever seen of a real person. I'm like, what is she, an impersonator? Freakishly good. She's talented. She's not just tits. I told my wife that. Ah, fucking wedding ring.

Yeah, so you get, here's my joke. One of my first marriage jokes. I go, yeah, they, wedding ring, they should call it a mood ring. I've been a shitty mood since I put it on Welcome to Rickles hour. All right Let me see how this is working. This is 23 days till the first kickoff That boy's queer for football yeah, fuck you But see I'm different than you I'm already watching the girls football. You know, there's like a chicks football. Did I tell you about that? Fucking broads running around. Oh,

my God. I'm like, Oh, I thought they were just a horrible high school team. I would like to have like an all state high school running back play against them or whatever. Anyways, but they haven't fought again. That's not the problem. If I'm an ugly fucking angry dy them or whatever. Anyways. But they're having fun. Again, that's not the problem. If I'm an ugly fucking angry dyke or whatever and I want to play football, you don't even have to be gay. I know. Oh, shut up.

Why am I being PC to you guys? You fucking understand how much I hate everybody. That's not the problem. Have your own league and go at it. That's fucking great. But just don't do what WNBA's trying to do and imitate. It's like little kids imitating their dad. It's fucking embarrassing.

Anyways, we'll get to that today because some chick got a sneaker deer, but she's white. So all the black people on the internet, black Twitter they call it, they're upset because apparently it's a black girl's game. That's one. You fucking, can you get over it? You ever get ever get over it all right I'll get off it again this is on the YouTube part of the show look like Bernie Sanders I'm ready to fucking shave my head what the fuck is going on anyways smile you're on candid camera a video from James Coper Haven one of the victims critically wounded in the

July 13th assassination attempt against former President Trump shows a figure moving across a rooftop moments before a gunfire. I mean, we'll show you this in a second. I just I can't believe and again, they haven't come out and said, this is what we're doing for new protocol, blah, blah, blah. Biden, who supposedly is still the president, hasn't commented on it. Do you understand nobody's running the place right now?

This car is on automatic fucking cruise control. Or they care that little to even put out a statement that they're upset what happened to Trump They are the most brazen month this fucking thing here. I said that Dallas after we Security guards at Best Buy would have start saw this kid He did everything but have a sandwich board on saying Trump gonna die. I mean Let's let's roll the video. Okay?

Nobody saw that, pause. I know for a fact that Alistair knows, being in the military, when somebody, if you're a sniper or whatever, you're on duty, it's constant this, isn't it? When you're expecting action. You're gonna tell me nobody was higher than him doing this and why not? Oh my God, this was such an inside job, you guys know it.

It's just the timing of Kamala and all this shit. They probably planned all that out. They said, we're gonna try to whack him. If it doesn't go good, we drop Biden, Kamala comes in, shift the story. I mean, this is how they think, folks. I've read enough fucking, you know, deep state shit. You know. how they think folks I've read enough fucking you know deep state shit you know anyways officials believe gunman Thomas Crooks 20 began shooting a with

a collapsible AR-15 style what's it fucking nerf three minutes so they believe he was shooting with a collapsible AR 15 or rifle whatever and then three minutes later around 6 11 PM counter snipers fatally shot crooks shortly afterward in law enforcement officials found eight shell casings near his body Look at him good-looking kid girl when a fucking smash his fucking face in Look at him. Good looking kid. I'm gonna fucking smash his fucking face in. Yeah, they did. They opened his head like a ripe cantaloupe, folks. A little too late, though.

It really is. We were glossing over how close we came to... And even white people would have loaded up and I think got out in the streets and started burning shit at this point. I said before, maybe maybe not I don't know crooks critically wounded a Cooper Haver 74 and David Dutch 57 both victims were shot twice according to those familiar with the with both victims Copa Haver was not filming when he was shot said his lawyer Joseph Feldman at the law offices of Maxi Feldman Feldman said Kopehever stopped filming when everyone turned their heads to look at a projection screen.

Mamma Mia, Papa Dia. I mean how much more they're not even good at being bad. That's how incompetent government is. You put it well when you're into DEI and that's the whole thing. Boy, Trump yesterday, I didn't even pull the clips that he was at a black conference, black news journal. They couldn't have been more hostile to him and just fucking assholes bringing up every racist thing they thought was racist.

Shit take it out of, they couldn't have been more fucking hostile to him and shit. And they asked about Kamala, you said she might not be black, that's the huge thing now. You said she might be a DEI hire. Well, yeah, Biden came out and said, I'm going to hire a black woman. I don't even think he said that as a retort, which somebody ought to tell him. What more better definition is that? That's what I'm saying. There's such a disconnect, it's hard for me to report, talk about this shit without wanting to put on the three stooges marathon.

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Big O Black Friday Sav savings going on now big o tires the team you trust let's goddamn move on shall we this was great trump's savior former president trump while speaking at a rally in harrisburg pennsylvania uh... wed Wednesday publicly thanked the woman who created a chart. He was referencing when he was shot in an assassination attempt saying she saved his life. This guy just falls into broads. She's only like a fine, okay I don't care I'm 62 I don't give a fuck. I'm 102. That's a fucking cute girl. And Trump's like, I wish I saved your life.

I wish you owed me something. I guarantee these t-shirts are already on leftist websites with her face and an X through it or something. Something saying, fuck you. You saved the devil. Right? If it's not, I'm going to start some. I need money.

On Wednesday, Trump was talking about immigration again, specifically about the border and human trafficking, when he brought up the now famous chart. He says, this chart saved my life. Where is that chart? I love that chart, Trump said. I'm going to sleep with that chart. Just fill in girl, because that's what he's really saying.

And I know you, me me and everybody else I'm gonna sleep up I swear to God he's dropping a hint on this broad and you go and she would never oh wait a minute he's the fucking president and president current as far as I'm concerned Trump said I'm going to sleep with that chart for the now he is weird for the rest of my life that chart you know the amazing thing you know that people that operate the computers and all that brilliant equipment we have backstage. He then spoke about the woman who created the chart

calling her great and had a nice rack, she said. He said, what? You can't do that. And he said she should come up on stage. Trump called the woman to the stage. She walked up and this is so cute and humbling and I like people who aren't comfortable. Let's take Biden move. No, she's a computer genius.

I like to get the booty shot on the way out. No, so you know, the third is open. And he's like, I love you for helping me to construct my life. And she's like, that's your world. I just live in it. Perfect, right? Too bad it wasn't a chick's voice. I mean, adorable young, beautiful lady.

Wait a minute, she works for him. If she constructed the chart she's involved in some shite. Anyways. That was pretty amazing. She'll go down in history or in his bedroom. Listen what? Knock it off with a sexist horse shat. I'm just saying. He goes, I'm going to sleep with that. What's funny is the Democrats got the memo from the top to call him and JD Vance weird now.

Every clip you see, whether it's MSNBC, CNN, Washington, whatever, they're all saying weird. ABC News, weird, weird, weird. I was flipping through, I was on the Internet and I see I click on ABC News and David Muir opening the opening story tonight. President Trump questioned Kamala Harris's African-American heritage. Oh my god. They just use that as a cudgel and they're smart because they're fucking right never figured out a way around it. More US progressive cowardice is the headline.

The masterminds of September 11 terror attacks and two other terrorists being held on Guantanamo Bay. I did comedy there believe it or not. Will be spared the death penalty under a deal with prosecutors. It was revealed on Wednesday. Did you hear that right folks? Spared the death penalty. I've been there and it's like a Sandals fucking resort. I swear to God They're right on the beach I'm not fucking shit is a beautiful sunset They have yoga mats out there and and remember that remember they said after they got there They weren't even there about six months. They all put on 20 pounds. They were eating so well and shit And we're paying for it folks people who fucking killed 3,000 Americans basically and this anyways what more do you need to know about the body ministry the announcement came as a

bitter pill to swallow for victims families who have anxiously awaited the conclusion of the case for nearly 24 years. Like that's acceptable. Many of whom felt death was the only appropriate punishment for the perpetrators of the heinous attack. Of course we all feel that way, don't you? Dead man walking. Four administrations worth. There you go. What does that tell you? And of course this one, could they be any more transparent how much they hate you American

citizens as opposed to the legal garbage pouring in? Yeah, this is the worst attack ever, but fuck it, you know what? Let's keep them around. Maybe when we take over and Hamas helps us, they can help us. I swear to God on my my mother, makes no sense. A spokesperson for the Office of Military Commissions, that's the OMC, Dallas was in there, which is prosecuting the case,

confirmed it had entered into pretrial agreements with Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the accused principal architect of the Al-Qaeda attacks, he looks like he's hung over, and two alleged co-conspirators, Walid Mohammed Saleh, Murbak bin Atash, and Mustafa Ahmed Aman Al-Hasawi, all of, my bad,

all of them have been held at the US military prison on the coast, and it is on the coast, of Cuba since 2003, in exchange for removal of the death penalty as a possible punishment these three accused have agreed to plead guilty to all of the charge offenses including the murder of the 2976 people listed in the charge sheet said a letter signed by rare Admiral Aaron C rough chief prosecutor for the OMC and sent to victims families on Wednesday see rough chief prosecutor for the OMC and sent to victims families on Wednesday.

News that the death penalty was no longer on the table for the suspects whose alleged actions killed nearly 3,000 in the worst terror attack on US soil in American history came as a gut punch to victims families you think look at this guy he thinks he's Conan O'Brien retired police officer What is this? Khalid Shake Lucky Charms? What the fuck? What's it called, Tom? Yeah. We're going to do a song called La Grange for you. ZZ fucking.

Anyways, retired police officer Jim Smith, husband of Maura Smith, the only female police officer who died on September 11, said he felt like he had been kicked in the balls. The prosecution and families have waited 23 years to have our day in court to put on the record what these animals did to our loved ones. They took that opportunity away from us,

the anguished widower said meanwhile the Biden-Harris administration still seeks to release other Guantanamo terrorists back into the world the administration's cowardice and the face of terror is a national disgrace he concluded and everybody else who has a half a fucking mind. Yeah we went down there the USO in 2000 and I don't know let's say around 10 ish. Do we go to Afghanistan after before I can't remember but we were shocked at how like beautiful it was some part of the and and they took us up in that tower, I've told this before on the show, that faces the Cuba side.

And they have a tower facing us. I don't know if it's a half a mile away, a quarter mile. But they're like, don't make any funny. That's what you want to do. Bring comics up in that tower. And say don't. Yeah, and the guy, that's right. And say say don't and the guy with us is like it has dressed whites to let them know I think he was look like captain Stubig

to me I know but uh that was friggin what an experience man and then doing comedy and uh calling Quinn going to be you're the only ones that can make the Marines moan at a joke. I actually had, not in Guantanamo Bay, one of the other ones, it might have been in Afghanistan, one of the sergeants who was in charge was like, oh that was a little, to me, I'm like, a little what? You paid killers for Christ sake I offended you anyways they were great and there was man and women soldiers and it was fucking awesome

you can't I'm just you can't have enough respect for those people and they're dealing with the shithead Biden administration now I mean the people who are currently in the military awful awful as they say hey for those of you guys a mug club stick around for the rest of this show everyone else go to nickdip.com join to get my full show the great Steven Crowder's full show and a whole lot more and while you're at nickdip.com click on the tour oh my god this is like now I'm getting nervous it's already here it's basically here I mean come on today's the first it's next week today's the first right is today the first a week from tomorrow wake from

tomorrow August 9th Jacksonville Center for the Performing Arts and then the next night August 10th gas south theater in Duluth Georgia come out to see me I'll be full of piss and vinegar I'm, since there's a lot going on. I can't. And when all this shit's going on, folks, oh, by the way, I want to tell you what we're talking about in the second half of the show before. Netanyahu takes care of one of the top Hamas leaders,

I mean, really high up in the ranks. And he did it the only way Israel could do it, by the way. You want to hear how that was amazing. Also, once again, there's some high-profile black people upset on black Twitter whatever that is upset about a white girl another white girl getting a sneaker deal in the WNBA and we'll cover that has nothing to do with her looking like a supermodel anyways boy the envy and the hate huh it's just I'm tired I'm tired out okay hi good night everybody Wow! Wow! Wow!

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