The Nick DiPaolo Show - Biden's Border Bad for Children | Nick Di Paolo Show #539

Episode Date: May 11, 2021

Swing voters take swing at Biden's immigration policies. United States government declares emergency after cyberattack on major fuel pipeline. Psycho kills 13 year old cheerleader, takes victory lap on Snapchat.

You know, I'm back on the road. This week I'm going to be on the road, so there's not going to be any episodes on Wednesday or Thursday. Instead, check me out Wednesday on the Gutfield Show on Fox News Channel at 11 p.m. Then see me live on Thursday at Hilarities in Cleveland, Friday at the FPX Theater in Baltimore, and Saturday at Soul Joel's in Royalsford, Pennsylvania. If you're anywhere near these cities, please get tickets to come out and see me. Go to nickdip.com slash tour, and we will be back at it here at the Nick DiPaolo Show

on the following Monday, as always, because I know I'm the one who gets you through your days. Wish like you had a second, a third term. And I used to say, you know what, if I could make an arrangement where I had a I had a stand in a front man front woman, and they had an earpiece in, and I was just in my basement in my sweats looking through the stuff. Then I could sort of deliver the lines, but somebody else was doing all the talking and ceremony. I'd be fine with that. Okay, Cyrano de Bergerac.

Racist country, that asshole got three terms. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, baby! How are you, folks? Welcome on a Tuesday. Good to be with you. Hello. I'm Mr. Red.

Guy comes home with a bouquet of flowers for his wife. I guess I'll have to spread my legs now, she says. Why, he asks. Don't you have a vase? Guy comes home with a bouquet of flowers for his wife. I guess I'll have to spread my legs now, she says. Why, he asks. Don't you have a vase? I'll play that, tell him 106. Funny is fucking funny. Nobody funnier than Uncle Junior.

How are you, boys and girls and everything in between? Want to be inclusive? What is going on in the world? It's coming apart at the seams. And Biden, holy shit, he couldn't fucking run a lemonade stand. His mind is deteriorating like a birthday cake in a rainstorm. Just fucking. But he won the election. Well, let's take a look at what he's done so far. This is Biden's compassionate world. Remember how upset they were about babies being ripped from mothers' arms and all that shit under Trump. Remember how just inhumane and horrible the orange monster in the White House was.

Well, let's see if Biden has improved things with his open border dog shit. A Texas rancher, I almost said ranger. Yeah, first baseman found some kids in a Texas rancher living north of Eagle Pass discovered five, five single unaccompanied children abandoned by smugglers on their farmland Saturday night. The five small girls ranging in ages, get this, from one to six years old were led across the Rio Grande River and abandoned the evening before. I can't for the life of me, and I love Latinos. I really do. Hardworking, conservative

people. And I know we all have, but you've got to be shitting me. You have to. Somebody handed these kids over to fucking smugglers or whatever. Somebody explain that to me, please. Check out, here's the farmer that found the kids. No mother, no mother, no father, no nothing. This is one of our workers' wives right here taking care of this tiny one. Oh my God. No one with these children dumped out on the side of the river here on our farm. If this doesn't make you mad and want you to take to the streets, I don't know what will. Un-fucking-real. Five-year-olds. I despise it with every fiber of my being.

One to five. No food. They left them nothing to drink. Are you fucking kidding me? So I don't want to hear any more about cages under Trump and all this horseshit. At least when babies were being ripped from mother's arms, it was another adult taking them, not leaving them to die in the fucking desert. Sarah Silverman, are you on it?

Rachel Maddow. Patton Oswalt, Mark Ruffalo. I don't see your tweets on this, you fucking two-faced prick face. Ah! That's me being bitter. I didn't make it in Hollywood.

But you know, honest to God. Hey, Deborah Messing, did you tweet about that? You fucking titless wonder. The human smugglers left them with no food, water, any adults to care for them throughout the goddamn night. Can you imagine? This is what's going on at the border.

Meanwhile, Biden hasn't even been out there yet, has he? Or has Vice President Harris? Has she gone out there yet? I know she went to New Hampshire. They have a horrible border problem. Yeah, apparently people from Maine are sneaking in there to steal corn seeds. I don't know what the fuck she's doing. Ay, ay, ay.

And again, they won't cover it. They just, they won't cover it. The media, I can't tell you. We hate politicians, you know. You know their approval ratings have never been above 10 for the last 50 years. But the media make them look legit and straight up honest. They are, the media is the cancer. The mainstream media is the cancer.

They have us at each other's throats. They should be arrested. Do what the, was it Stalin who arrested all the intellectuals and shot them? Oh, that's right. There's no intellectuals on the mainstream media. So they can go. Anyways, that's what we're getting from Biden. And people are noticing.

Who's noticing? Swing voters are taking a swing at Biden's immigration policy. President Joe Biden's chaotic migration policy is disastrously unpopular. But the critical swing voters are not yet blaming him for the mess, of course, because the media sucks his dick every day. Isn't it nice to have a president who's presidential, even though he's wearing an adult diaper, he's very quiet about it? Isn't it fucking nice? Anyway, so they're not blaming him for the mess. According to a poll of 1872

registered voters by Harvard Harris, a kid I went to school with, when the question is phrased by specifically referencing Joe Biden or comparing a Biden policy to a Donald Trump policy, surprise, surprise, then Biden gets a bump, a Biden bump of sympathy. Rob Law, the director of regulatory affairs and policy for the Center for Immigration Studies, told Breitbart News on Sunday they want to think of him as the nice, lovable guy, he said. And they do. The people do. They really are. He's the evil, most evil fuck in the White House. But the poll shows the voters strongly prefer Trump's border policy. Eight out of ten likely voters in the April 27th through 29th poll said the current surge in illegal immigrants at the border is a crisis that needs to be addressed immediately.

Just two out of 10 said it's something that can be dealt with by the immigration system we have currently in place. And who are those two? Biden and Harris? Biden and Harris. 85% of respondents said they want stronger borders and just 15% or one in six said they want weaker borders. Somebody said they want weaker borders. You know what I say to those people? This is country. We want weaker borders.

They couldn't get any weaker. You hate this country. Move to El Salvador, Jackoffs. any weaker. You hate this country. Move to El Salvador, Jackoffs. Almost seven out of 10 respondents said they want people who crossed the border with Mexico illegally to be turned back to Mexico. And I'm supposed to believe after reading this poll that Trump lost. Why don't you lick my salty ball back tonight? Just 32% said they should be released into the United States with a court date. Those are all liberal jagoffs. The critical block of swing voters is still giving Biden the benefit of the doubt in the third month of his presidency,

and that's why we're in the mess we're in. Even though his deputies are helping tens of thousands of job-seeking migrants sneak across the border, helping tens of thousands of job-seeking migrants sneak across the border while the manipulated media focuses on migrants, children, and fractured families, because that's what they do. Look over here while the little kids are laying in the desert at night by themselves. The poll asked, is the Biden administration creating an open border, or is it just trying to enforce immigration laws more humanely. The respondents split evenly, with 53% saying he wants to enforce immigration laws more humanely. You fucking people.

You have no idea how to defend a nation. Long as he's nice about it. That's the most overrated thing, and I can say this from a guy who's been called an asshole since he was eight. Being nice and cordial and all that shit, put it all aside. I'll take leadership qualities over being nice, you know?

But you want me to believe that even if Trump was nice, they would have liked him? No. You know why? He's a blonde-haired, blue-eyed, billionaire alpha male. The devil incarnate to the left. So don't, you know. Oh, but Joe's nice. He's nice about the kids. You know, the kids are sure they're being raped in the Rio Grande River, but he's nice about it when they talk to him. That's important.

He should be hosting a game show. He's like Wink Martindale. Harvard Harris asked, do you think Biden border policies are increasing the flow of drugs and crime to the United States? What's that, a rhetorical question? The United States or are those policies simply treating people more humanely? 46% said his policies are treating people more humanely. Yes, there's evidence of it. Babies, one through five, in the desert by themselves. Young girls being sexually molested. But he's nice about it. Biden's honeymoon will end, the guy who wrote this says, and I agree, in the fall. This is a guy named Law, Rob Law predicted, as more and more people start to recognize that the policies that we want to see in place, this administration, regardless of how

kind and patient we are, they don't share that same philosophy. Probably towards the end of summer, as American kids are hopefully going back to school, I wouldn't hold my breath on that either, and then all of a sudden they see a whole new population of illegal aliens that are dumped into the same classrooms as their kids and recognize that it's not an anomaly, that it's intentional. I know my sister-in-law is a teacher, right, up in Waterbury, Connecticut, and she would tell me these stories. She wouldn't even recognize her class from one day to the next. All of a sudden, she's like, it looks like she's the coach of a, you know, a fucking Guatemalan softball team.

How does that help the country? Bringing people pouring in who don't have our values, can't speak the language. It doesn't. It sucks us dry. The Harvard-Harris poll suggests the block of swing voters wants Biden to resolve the crisis real soon. Well, that's not what I got from the numbers. Come on, God damn it. Let's go, let's go, let's go. That's somebody who wants it solved.

It's a guy trying to get through a goddamn Antifa rally. It's a guy trying to get through a goddamn Antifa rally. 77% of respondents said they think the president and or the vice president should visit the southern border now. Oh, wow, aren't they detectives? Just 23% said they should not visit the border. Who are those 23%? And why can't we burn them alive in front of their children? I'm just teasing. Drown them like ISIS does. Put them in front of their children. I'm just teasing.

Drown them like ISIS does. Put them in cages into the ocean. The poll seems to be a reasonable survey of the swing voting conflicted Americans who want nice Joe Biden to nicely implement Trump's tough pro-American border policies. And I'll say it again, never mind the fucking, never mind the nice. Vince Lombardi,

his players hated him. Bill Parcells, his players hated him. Real good coaches. Nobody blowing Belichick after a game either. For example, 46% of respondents said they favor Trump, including 26% who said they strongly favor his policies. The poll show Biden with an anemic approval of just... Come on, man. Just 55%. Nothing, fellas? Jesus Christ, you're a tough crowd. Fucking unbelievable.

Just 55% and Vice President Kamala Harris got just 50%, which is 48% too much for that fucking yeast infection on wheels. So to boil that down, that poll, they want Trump's policies, but they want Biden because he's a nicer guy to implement them. But you're not going to get either, okay, until the midterms. And even then, if Dominion's still running the fucking elections like we're going to cover later on, nothing's going to change in this country. How do you not know that when you went to vote? How did you not know that? Let me ask you a question, assholes. They sure love you in Dallas Prison. Anyways. Let's move on to a corrupt government after a sip of my coffee that's staining my teeth.

Let's move on to a corrupt government after a sip of my coffee that's staining my teeth. Oh, that's terrific. Department of Justice hires deranged liar Susan Hennessey. There she is. Boy, piece of ass, though. I'll give her that much. But all good-looking girls are liars. What?

Please give me a cup. I'll be right there. She's cute. Why so dumb? Delicious. Let me just take that in. La, la, la la la la la. Hennessy tweeted this.

I'm very honored to be joining the extraordinary team at the Department of Justice and the National Security Division. Thank you for all the kind words and a huge thanks to the guys that I had to blow in the men's room. Hep Gilligan! And a huge thanks to the folks at the White House PPO agency, White House liaisons, and HRs who are working night and day to staff this government and ruin this country, I added. Anyhow, and get this, folks folks she deleted all her old tweets now why would she do that why would she do that Glenn Greenwald who is no right winger who's excellent by the way

Tucker has him on a lot great right down the middle fair, old school lib. Glenn Greenwald responded to her tweet. She, and he said, because at Susan Hennessey was one of the most deranged Russiagate conspirators of the last four years, she wisely deleted all of her tweets at some point before this announcement. But you can still read her attempt to elevate the Steele dossier here. Imagine she was in the middle of that. This is how Biden does the hiring. Pelosi has a list of people that Republicans hated the most and said she's in. Unbelievable. How dare you hire this lying bag of cheese? She's a malignant cunt. Oh, you don't have to talk like that about her. Easy. That's my girl. That's my lollipop. That's my can of tomatoes.

She got nice yams. Ha! Michael Tracy tweeted and replied to Ms. Hennessey, Susan Hennessey transitioned seamlessly from the NSA lawyer to Trump-era TV and social media pundit, shaping public perceptions of the Russian collusion storyline based on her crazed theories, and then right back to the national security state. Such a blatant, transparent corruption.

Excuse me. She's giving me heartburn, this young lady. These are people that know her work. This is who the Biden administration is loading up on. Caleb Howell tweeted at Hennessy. Hey, at Susan Hennessy, why did you delete this along with hundreds of other Russiagate tweets? They're talking thousands. Russiagate tweets.

They're talking thousands. Jeff Carlson wrote on Twitter, I have responded to many of Hennessy's factually incorrect claims on the Steele dossier, Russia collusion, et cetera, over the years. Every single tweet of hers that I responded to

now shows a unavailable. Deleted every single one of them. So there's nothing to see there either. And do you think when Freckleface, the female Conan O'Brien, Jen Psaki goes in front of the press corps, do you think anybody will ask that?

Jim Acosta, will you ask about that? Anybody? Will you ask about that? No. You'll go, Jen, is the president's dog, is he still biting people? Because if, you know, they say if you change his food and rub his ball sack every five minutes, he'll be fine.

Is that true? Asshole. These are the questions. What kind of ice cream is that? Hey, president, what did you think of that episode of murder she wrote last night? That was a doozy, wasn't it? Dink. Do you still use denture cream? Hey, guys, I want to take a second and talk to you about Upstart.com. If you're carrying a credit card balance month after month, or if you dread looking at your credit card statement, you should know these guys.

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We thank them for sponsoring the show today. Good product, good sponsor. Don't forget to watch me on Gutfeld tomorrow night. Last time I did a show, not this form of the show, I think I said, I'd say 10 or 11 sentences, and they cut nine of them. Can't believe they let me back in. Let's get on to the government and how they're porking us in the ass.

United States government declares emergency after cyber attack on major fuel pipeline. Hey, Joe, how's it going? How's it going, Joe? Huh? People pouring in over the border. I got gas today. It was 389 here in Georgia. Thought I was in New York for a second.

That's only going to get worse. Admit it, he sucks. The attack on Colonial Pipeline is one of the most disruptive digital ransom schemes reported, and the resulting shutdown has disrupted fuel supply across the eastern United States, triggering isolated sales restrictions at retail pumps and pushing benchmark gasoline prices to a three-year high. How'd it go, Joe? A three-year high. He's been in office three months.

He's wrecking the place. Cost me $78 today. What am I, filling a fucking Learjet? And it's an electric car. Get out of here. Imagine us driving an electric car. Anyways, a new release issued on Monday in the name of cyber group Dark Side.

That might be the name of my next album. I'm a real nut. The group suspected of the attack on the pipeline said, our goal is to make money in not creating problems for society. Sounds like Biden's administration's goals. Its statement did not mention colonial pipeline by name, but we know they did it, dark side. Lawmakers urged, now I heard,

I don't know if it says it in the article, that these hackers might be Russian and stuff. Now let's see you get upset about Russia when it's legit. Lawmakers urged stronger protections for critical U.S. energy infrastructure, and the White House has made restarting the fuel network a top priority and organized a federal task force

to assess the impact and avoid more serious and severe disruption. So Joe's in charge. What are we doing? You have no idea. What's going on right now? What's going on? The pipeline's banned, and of course

who does it affect the most? Southeastern states. For Christ's sake, I moved from New York down here. Fucking both senators lose in Georgia. Gas prices are $3.89. What the fuck? I gotta move back to New York?

I would never do that. I love this place so much. Have you ever had grits? Oh, my God. Us Ginnies call it polenta. They call it grits. But a rose by any other name still tastes like 18-year-old ass. Who's with me?

All right. Wasn't that the quote? Oh, come on, folks. That was a good one. Or is Larry the Cable Guy at the front? Okay, here you are. Anyways, while the United States government investigation into the attacks is in its early stages, a former U.S. official and three industry sources said the hackers are suspected to be cybercriminal group called DarkSide.

The southeastern United States, that's where we are right now, you can see my house on the goddamn map, would likely be the first to see price increases at retail pumps, which I saw this morning. And demand has already picked up as drivers fill their tanks. We're going back to Jimmy Carter, 1976. Inflation's going up. A two-by-four costs you $400. Gas prices are going up. Does Joe have a peanut farm we should be worrying about? Yeah, I love that. Remember fucking Jimmy Carter?

He was a horrible president, but remember he lusted after a Playboy centerfold? I love that sweet pussy. The Southeast is the most dependent on this gas line and has fewer alternatives than states further north and has seen prices spike during previous shutdowns. Gas stations in Southeastern states such as, oh, they mentioned Georgia first.

I'm glad I'm here. Son of a whore! North Carolina and Tennessee were seeing some abnormal buying fed by demand fears, said Patrick Dahan, head of petroleum analysis at GasBuddy. That's my screen name. No, that's my enterologist's screen name. No, that's my entereologist's screen name. Colonial said on Sunday it restarted some smaller lines between fuel terminals and customer delivery points, but its main lines remain shut.

The pipeline system is the primary fuel artery from Gulf Coast refineries to mid-Atlantic and southeast states. from Gulf Coast refineries to mid-Atlantic and southeast states. It moves over 2.5 million barrels per day of gasoline, diesel, and jet fuel. So those prices will be good. Supplying motorists and major airports. The Department of Transportation announced emergency measures. They had a state of emergency. Was it North Carolina I saw on TV? Emergency measures.

They had a state of emergency. Was it North Carolina I saw on TV? Emergency measures on Sunday to facilitate deliveries, lifting driver restrictions on fuel haulers in 17 states affected by the shutdown. It could take additional measures if the outage continues. So this is where we are. Let's summarize. Inflation, up.

Gas prices, up. Cyber attacks. Here's my big fear. Newt Gingrich, no dummy, says this is an act of war and it should be treated like one. He said we should treat them like terrorists. We should have a list of cyber attacks. Then what are we going to do? Not let them fly? I mean, but it's true, man. I mean,

what makes me nervous is I'm going to be on a plane heading to Zany's in Chicago, and somebody's going to fuck with the electrical grid. You know what I mean? And all the lights are going to go out in my pilot's cockpit. That's my big fear. Why? Because I'm selfish. I worry about me first. Fuck the rest of you. I don't care about your gas prices. I got to get to Zany's. I got chlamydia there like 17 years ago. True story. Back to the show. Must have had a good set tonight. I think it's because I was wearing Dracar and a fake mustache. I was hitchhiking to University of Maine. This is back in like 1980, 81. Literally, fucking minus seven degrees, I'm on 95 in New Hampshire. I had a girlfriend at UNH.

I used to thumb down and see her from Orono, Maine. And this guy picks me up in an 18-wheeler. I'm a real Mainer. I told him I went to University of Maine. He looks at me real serious. Still do them, they still do them them panty raids up there? I wanted to jump out of the truck, but he was doing about 96,

and it was quite a drop to the road, but that creeped me out. Still doing them panty raids? I'm like, I don't know. What can I do for you? Anyways, I digress. Let's get to Arizona. This is my favorite story. And like anything else, the mainstream media won't cover it because it doesn't fit their dog shit left-wing narrative.

Arizona audit director Ken Bennett discusses the latest developments in the Maricopa County forensic audit. The Maricopa County Election Board claimed this week they do not have admin access to their county's voting machine. What the f- What the hell's going on out here? How is that possible? If this is the case, then the county did not own the election process, they ceded it to the external vendor. That would be dominion, I believe. System administrators are individuals who have access to the systems at their highest levels. These individuals are able to perform all sorts of duties. They're able to perform most all the

functions and changes in a system. They have complete and total control and can even delete or alter system logs. I think it was One American News talked to this guy, Ken Bennett, who's in charge, and this is what he had to say about this fucking stolen election, in my opinion. Roll tape.

Maricopa County doesn't have complete access to those election machines, but they've told us that they don't have that second password or that they've given us all the passwords that they have. Liars! They've also told us that they now can't, as they promised a couple of weeks ago, provide our subcontractors with the virtual access to the routers and hubs and other things over at the McTec,icopa County Tabulation and Election Center as was part of the subpoena. So yeah the passwords to get into the administrative functions of the machines and virtual access as they promised they would give to the routers and the hubs is still forthcoming. You fucking believe it? The county doesn't even have the passwords to get into the machine.

Nothing to see here. Please disperse. Nothing to see here. Please. Mm-hmm. Counselor? I'm on my way. Counselor? Are you there, Counselor?

Could you be there? Oh, fuck it. It's stolen, folks. Why don't we just stop the audit? I got enough proof. They don't even bring up. I watch people arguing about this on my side. They take my view that it was stolen.

They don't even bring up, like, the surveillance cameras at four in the morning with trucks pulling up with ballots and suitcases being pulled out under, they don't even mention it. The fact that the county does not have system administrators who have administrative access to the Dominion voting machines is a big concern. By allowing Dominion to have the administration access only, the county has basically turned over the system to the Dominion voting machine system people. Have a look at their past. Spent a lot of time in Guatemala.

There is no, get this, there's no IT control here because that's been ceded to Dominion. How does this happen in the United States? It's just a ridiculous. No, it wasn't stolen. Excuse me, can we have the passwords to the election we're supposed to run here? Hey, fuck off. Go get me coffee, bitch.

Yeah, I'll give you the password. ABC Big Dick Jim, 124. Yeah, I'll give you the password. ABC Big Dick Jim, 124. Johnny Grizzlecock, 88, at fucking demoncy.org. Try that one. By the way, in general, most frauds that include IT-related processes

have at least one IT person involved in the fraud. So it's an inside job. In his interview with What America News, Ken Bennett said Dominion is refusing to comply with the state Senate subpoenas. So they're just ignoring the subpoenas. Can you fuck? What is?

Try ignoring a subpoena at home, folks. Try doing that. It's harder than ignoring your wife. I'm telling you, Senate subpoenas and is hiding the second password for their machines. I've been all night trying to come up with a password. Jelly bean, red, fucking

butter bing 71. Anyways, so every time people at Maricopa Conti who was in charge of the elections, asked somebody from Dominion if they could have the password, they go, I don't know nothing about that. His father ran state elections with my father over in Palermo.

Sure, sure, sure. Guys, guys, do you need any more evidence that this was stolen? Nobody watching this show believes that was a legit. We got to get the people who believe Biden is the actual president to watch the show and somehow dox them. I'm going to send Benjamin to your house with a fucking rusty machete. Dominion was in charge of Maricopa County election

and now they're refusing to cooperate with the subpoenas sent to them by the legislatures. Can you fucking imagine that illegal? What? Nothing for you. Ah. So that's just Arizona, by the way. We already know that

Michigan, Pennsylvania, they changed their laws. Not even the legislatures changed their laws two weeks before the election. You guys know the story. That fucking thing was stolen like a car radio in fucking New York City in 1978.

Do we still steal radios? Why? Not you, Matt. No, you're white. Anyways. What? Who said? That was a joke, everybody.

I'm half Guinea. I have black blood. I can say that. That's what Patrice O'Neill told me. Here's some more Maricopa County fraud election news. Back on November 30th, 2020, Maricopa County elections witness Jan Bryant, who Matt dated apparently, testified before Arizona legislature. Jan has a strong project management background.

She could not believe what she witnessed during the 2020 election in Maricopa County, Arizona. Just ignore her haircut because Shemp called and wants it back. But this woman was there, right? She has a strong background in project management, and she knows all about how this election's supposed to be run. She was there as a witness and couldn't believe what she was seeing. Let her tell you herself. Go ahead.

You know, the glass and the servers in a glass room and all the computers are on a single cable that you can see. None of that matters because two things. One, Dominion employees were the only ones that were running any of that equipment so no and I was in the tabulation center seven six different days day and night shifts did you say anything no county employees no IT people my show my show my show is touching any of the software. They did all the training for the adjudicators. They ran all the reports. And so, and I brought that up on my very first day in the room.

I said, this doesn't seem right. As a person with my background, never in a million years would I turn my company's most important thing over to someone else. And there's only two guys. most important thing over to someone else and there's only two guys and they had the whole control of everything. I also participated in the random ballot selection for hand audit, picking the ballots, you know, determining which bin we were going to select and even that Dominion ran the reports for, for so no one i mean there was they knew exactly what was in the hand audit boxes that made me nervous also um and they also got the idea jesus christ nothing to see here please what did you do about it jan did you Did you at least say, look, I'll give you a handjob for the password? You've got to use your sexiness. Jan's testimony might explain why Maricopa County officials do not have admin passwords or access to the Dominion voting machines.

They said there were two guys from Dominion that ran the whole show. So who are the pussies that let him take over? They're guilty too, in my opinion. that let him take over. They're guilty too, in my opinion. Jan also testified under oath that county staff, not even IT staff, were allowed access to the voting machines and that she witnessed Dominion employees with a laptop computer

in the counting room. That doesn't look too nefarious, huh? I'm sure they're playing solitaire. Did anybody... I want to know who ceded all the power. I'm sure they were getting paid off or whatever, or they got marching orders from the top. Do we have those names?

Who were the people that were supposed to be in charge? 60 minutes, I'm sure you'll get to the bottom of it this week, right? Jan worked six days at Mach Tech, M-C-T-E-C, and has an MBA in project management background in technology, also a Girl Scout with three badges. That story made me nervous. Matt, remember, I get to smoke and you don't.

Seriously. I don't want to place this down. Coffee's going to have a smoky flavor in about five minutes. All right. Let's move on, shall we? In our Libs Eating Libs segment tonight, the 2022 Golden Globes will be canceled on NBC. No! No! No! No!

I'm like that fucking lesbian when you found out Trump won. Ah! Only I'm way more feminine. Who gives a fuck is my response. NBC is going to cancel the, they're not going to do them until 2022. Somebody mark my calendar. As the Hollywood Foreign Press Association,

that's HFPA, the organization responsible for presenting the annual Golden Globe Awards ceremony faces, get this, fire over accusations of corruption, sexism, and lack of diversity. Boy. That's libs going after libs.

That's why we call it this segment. We continue to believe that the HFPA is committed to meaningful reform. However, change of this magnitude takes time and work. This is somebody from NBC, I'm guessing. And we feel strongly that the HFPA needs time to do it right, NBC said on Monday, according to a report by the Los Angeles Times. As such, NBC will not air the 2022 Golden Globes, the Comcast's own network added. Assuming the organization executes on its plan, we are hopeful we will be in a position to air the show in January 2023. That's like, yeah, I'll call you.

Yeah, I'll get back to you. Don't worry about it. Who gives a fuck? Can you imagine worrying about this after seeing the ratings for the Oscars the last 10 years plummet because the world finally realizes that that world is just a bunch of left-wing, blowhard, American-hating douchebags who really think they're morally superior to you, and people have finally had enough, even people on the left. I guess the staff at the foreign whatever the fuck doesn't look like the Detroit Pistons bench. What does that mean?

That was a black crack. NBC's announcement arrives as WarnerMedia, Netflix, and Amazon cut ties with the HFPA as the organization moves to enact reforms to address what the study calls longstanding issues about the organization's demographics, lack of non-white members, and its ethics. Oh, they're just caught in a loop out there. Wake up, white people. Do you really believe it's not the verse?

I mean, in 2021, anything that has to do with Hollywood, do you really believe that? Oh, God help. In March, the HFPA committed to having 13% black membership. You see how that works? Because black people make up about 13% of the American population. So let's have 13% of black membership. After it was criticized for not having a black journalist among its members.

And after 100 PR firms, Puerto Rican firms, sent a letter demanding the organization make changes. On Saturday, Marvel movie superstar Scarlett Johansson, I don't see the big deal. I know she's kind of hot, but people freak out over this broad. Right there, she looks like the lead singer for Coldplay. Right there, she looks like the lead singer for Coldplay. Anyway, Scarlett Johansson called out the HFPA saying she faced sexist questions at one of its press conferences. Like, give me an example.

And if it wasn't something like, hey, how big are your nipples? I don't want to hear it. What did they say? What's it like to be a woman making $60 million a minute? Was that the question? What upset you, sugar pie, honey bunch? Look, she's wearing chains to show her solidarity with the black people of America. The Black Widow star urged the entertainment industry to take a step back from the HFPA, and they responded to her like this. Christy, get down on your knees

so Sabrina can see your asshole. That's sexist. I don't even like that type of language. A day early on Friday, actor and Marvel movie star Mark... Oh, Mark. Mark. Ugh. Mark. I suck cock, Ruffalo. I hate that guy. He's got the most punchable face. Became the first Hollywood A-lister, A-lister, suck my nut, to distance himself from the organization. The HFPA is also hiring a chief diversity, equity, and inclusion officer to jack everybody off in the minority community, the marginalized, and ga-ga-ga-ga.

Diversity, equity, and inclusion officer to address its public relations crisis. The race and corruption controversy was a cloud hanging over this year's Golden Globes telecast that 11 people watched, which ended up being a woke broadcast filled with, really? One left-wing acceptance speech after another? You're kidding. As opposed to the other ones that were just like a bastion of conservatism. Remember the year Pat Buchanan hosted? Christ, it was terrific.

The broadcast ratings tanked to an all-time low. We have the ratings. Yeah, that doesn't sound good. Anyways. As you guys know, I'm in Georgia now, but I spent years in New York as a homeowner. And while there are lots of differences, one thing is the same.

Every year at this time, my lawn sucked. Neighbors would give me the finger. It was horrible. There were brown spots and bare patches and stuff. You know, it was just ugly. It's just not my strong suit, you know? So this year I got turned on to Sunday and I've been really impressed.

No more standing at the store looking at stacks of seeds and chemicals pretending you know what you're doing and not knowing which one I need to buy for my lawn. That was so embarrassing. It's so unique what they do. I went online, I put in my address, and they did a free lawn analysis. I saw a picture of my lawn from above and let them know about the weeds in my yard, too.

They use soil and climate data based on my neighborhood. That's specific. To create a tailored plan so I'd get all the stuff my lawn needs. That's actually an ingenious idea. Then a box showed up in the mail with a pouch that I attached to my garden hose and sprayed, and that was it. I don't know who thought of this genius idea. I think this is a game changer for guys like you and me.

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No, no, no! In our FLA segment tonight, Psycho kills 13-year-old cheerleader and takes victory lap on Snapchat. What else in Florida? A teenage boy. This sent chills up my spine. We've created some real monsters in this country that have... They're dead from the inside out because they've been on

social media since they were five. A teenage boy posted a disturbing image on Snapchat after he was busted for the slaying of a 13-year-old cheerleader found dead in a remote wooded area, Florida cops said on Monday. Here's one of the cops talking about finding the body. Kristen Bailey's body that was actually located by a person in the neighborhood, a citizen in the

neighborhood, and actually called 911, called the sheriff's office. We went out there and actually processed the body and recovered the body. Since then, we actually have arrested a suspect by the name of Aiden Fucci, F-U-C-C-I, 14-year-old. He's currently in custody for the Department of Juvenile Justice, charged with second-degree murder.

Yeah, good. Piece of shit. In a twisted Snapchat posted after the arrest, Fucci can be seen giving the peace sign in the back of a patrol car. Okay? What is going on? Bailey, is it Bailey?

A seventh grader at Patriot Oaks Academy where Fucci is in the eighth grade but last seen Sunday at around 1.15 a.m. at a community center, a local outlet. WJXT reported. Her family reported her missing at 10 a.m. and a large search of the area ensued with dozens of community members scouring the woods near the North

Amenity Center. God fucking help them. Hello? Bailey's body was found by a neighbor at around 6 p.m. in a remote wooded area near a pond. How disgusting. Later that night, Fucci posted the photo with the twisted message on Snapchat, according to WJXT.

You believe this piece of garbage? You smug cocksucker. Fuck you. The sheriff said that authorities were aware of the chilling selfie, but didn't comment on it further. In addition to attending the same K through 8 school, the teens grew up in the same neighborhood, according to local outlets.

Oh, this is making me angry. I'm going to fucking smash his fucking face in. That's what we've created, though. Just soulless. Zombies. I'd love to know his background. Let me guess. Loner, quiet, no friends.

I mean, how many times? That's somebody's sister, daughter. I can't even fathom. Can't even fathom it. Anyways, that is it for today, ladies and gentlemen. Don't forget, now, this is the last show of the week. I have to head to New York tomorrow. 7.15 a.m. flight.

Might as well go to bed now. And then tomorrow night I'll be on Gutfeld's show at 11. Make sure you tune into that. And the following night I'll be at Hilarity's in Cleveland for two shows. And then on Friday night in Baltimore, FPX Theater. And Saturday night at Soul Jolt's in Royersford, Pennsylvania. So that's where I'll be. Hope to see you out there.

Don't forget thecomicsgym.com. That's where this show is. Don't forget nickdip.com. Excuse me. And cameo.com. If you want me to roast one of your friends or relatives, go to cameo.com, click on my profile, tell me about the person. I'll make a personal

video on my phone and send it to them. And it's a lot of fun. I can make or break their day, whatever you choose. Before I go, I want to thank everybody that contributes to the show, makes it possible. Paul Sagnella, Connecticut, who's always in there. Sean Powell, Florida. I recognize a lot of these. Charlotte Andreas, Texas. Warren Dybvig, Canada. Charles Poe, North Carolina. Enrique Mendoza, California. John Rose of Kentucky. And new monthly supporters. I want to thank Ken Hedville of Washington.

Luke Anderson of Kentucky. Jason McIntosh. Thank you guys, both people who contribute on a daily, at the daily level and monthly subscribers. Thank you guys. We need this show and you guys keep it alive with your contributions and we appreciate that. That is it, you guys. Thank it. I will say it. You're very welcome. I will see you back here on Monday. Until then, stay safe. Take care. guitar solo We'll see you next time.