The Nick DiPaolo Show - Confirming ACB Easy as ABC | Nick Di Paolo #434

Episode Date: October 27, 2020

Senators vote along party lines on ACB confirmation. Dems get the jitters as polls tilt towards Trump. Kamala's wife? Watch Biden's latest gender-bending gaff. 

Hey everybody, free speech is under attack and it doesn't matter if you're a comedian like me or the commander in chief and it's not just the media anymore, it's the people who run our hospitals and teach our kids, the World Health Organization. We can't let this happen, we have to keep telling the truth and that's what I try to do every day on this show. keep telling the truth. And that's what I try to do every day on this show. As you know, Twitter shadow banned me years ago before I even knew what it was. And YouTube blocked me. I've been punched in the face after a show. I've been fired from a radio job. But they can't stop me, though. OK? I'm just going to keep coming at you like the raging bull. I'm putting the finishing touches on my new platform where I can say whatever the fuck I want.

And yes, I'll be giving it away for free, just like Trump will with a vaccine. In the meantime, I'm going to use YouTube and use other platforms that I mean use to help spread the word. So we are bigger and stronger when I finally make the jump to the new platform. I also need your help to continue to build the platform and keep this show and future shows free. It ain't cheap to build this platform. Please consider contributing at www.nickdip.com and know that your contributions keep free speech and my style of free speech alive. Thank you guys so much. Oh yeah, tickle them friends Yeah, how are you folks? Welcome to the show on a Tuesday

Which means tomorrow's Wednesday, which is the second last day to work Which the following day is Thursday That's how I look at life because I'm enjoying it Always looking ahead, getting on a plane to go to do comedy You know what I'm fantasizing about? Driving to the airport, hitting my couch when I get home. How do you like to live life like that? Even when you, and I'm doing something I love. I just, I don't know. I'm just a privileged. I have white privilege. I'm a toxic male. I have my periods. There's nowhere. What a fucking world we're living in,

folks. That's all I got to say. This 2020 has been the most interesting year, at least for anybody alive at this point. I mean, I'm sure people lived through the real pandemic and the real depression and World War I and II and shit. I mean, that, you know. But

I'd rather be in World War II getting shot at by Germans and listen to five minutes of fucking CNN just as painful if you can fucking stomach Wolf Blitzer for fucking three minutes you should get a purple cross or a bronze

star or some other shit I can't find a story I tell you guys I go every morning I read the website I can't find a story. I tell you guys, I go every morning, I read the website. I can't find one that's even close to trying to be honest. Un-fuck,

you got to go to Breitbart to honestly, it's all fact driven. The statistics and shit. I mean, you fucking people, you disgratsiar. You make me sick to my goddamn stomach.

I'll tell you to fuck how much. Mr. DiPaolo, no one can be as nasty as you pretend to be unless they really wanted to be disliked. Yeah, glad you're catching on, Bob. Dislike works. You know who my hero's becoming? Morton Downey Jr., who had a TV show for you youngsters out there on. had a TV show for you youngsters out there on. He had nice fake false teeth, just an ugly guy, smoke. They said four packs a day, and that's what killed him eventually. But he was on TV, and he's screaming at the TV. He's a real right winger.

He'd have Al Sharpton sit next to like the Klan, and they'd be surprised a brawl broke out. It made Geraldo's show look like fucking legitimate journalism. But it was so fun. He was just, get out of my studio. But you know what? Some of it was genuine. Anyways, I just, I get up this morning, right? And again, I've been in the bathroom all morning, giving birth to triplets.

I don't know what the fuck I have. Some people call it 2A, chicken and broccoli. I don't know what. But anyways, I finally get out of my little stoop there with my phone, looking at the stories, see what's going on. And these are the headlines I woke up to this morning. I took a screenshot of my phone. Philly in crisis, at least 30 cops injured in mob attacks.

I guess there was a shooting. Bunch of guys are coming out of cops. And they fucking mobs are attacking the cops. 30 cops injured in Philly. Right below that, dead woman reportedly found naked. That's not salacious enough. Missing a thumb. Missing a thumb.

Did they check her boyfriend's asshole? Hello? Right next to that, disturbing video shows man dumping pregnant girlfriend's body on expressway in Queens. So the bottom two are New York related and there were more sick New York stories.

That ain't bother. That's what I opened my eyes to. And you guys, what is going on? What the fuck? What the hell's going on out here? What's the matter? What's the world coming to?

Unbelievable. Unbelievable. May you live in interesting times, which I think is kind of like a insult to somebody. Somebody once said it. Jace, you know who said it? You're a literature major. May you live in interesting times. I think, you know who said it? You're a literature major. I think, you know who said it?

I think Hank Stram, the coach of the Kansas City Chiefs. Mr. Officials, let me ask you something. How could three years miss a play like that? And the ref goes, I thought you were talking. What? The ref bullshitted him. Excuse me. Anyways.

Oh, by the way, I won that pool. Again, I like to open with a little yappity-yap. I won that football pool last year with over 100 people in it. I came in first.

What place am I in this year? After seven weeks. How about 94th? Last night, two minutes before game time, I changed my pick from the Rams to the Bears. Yeah. By the second quarter, they're down by three touchdowns. Anyways, I don't get too excited

because you always look at the top and it's somebody named Brittany. I'm sure she knows a 3-4 defense or a nickel package when she sees it. Fucking always broads at the top. Well, how'd you pick them? I like their shirts. I'm trying to come up with the gayest way to pick

because I'm done picking using my mind. So I said, what is the gayest way I could pick? And my wife came up with a good, she goes, pick the team with what quarterback you want to fuck the most. And I said, I think you're projecting there. So now actually I went with Garoppolo. No, I didn't actually. Not that I want to fuck Cam Newton. How about that? The wheels are coming off that fucking experiment. He threw three picks. Belichick sat him down. And let me just explain to you people who are anti-Patriot.

That's not the real Patriots. You know, they have four starters who opted out of this season, not to mention COVID and injury. There's fucking scrubs out there. I can't believe they won a game. But anyways, and everybody's going to go, oh, see that? It was Brady. It wasn't Belichick.

It was the genius. Excuse me, cigarettes. So those are the headlines I woke up to and not to mention, you know, having diarrhea all morning. But then again, I did a little reading on vapes. I was sucking on that vape for the last two days. Like it was a lollipop. That's all nicotine. And I wonder why. And I looked at people online. Yeah, you get the shits, stomachache. So I went to this. I'm back to cancer over vaping. Let's get right to it. Amy Coney Barrett, ACB we call her, was confirmed as Supreme Court Justice. Boy, that went down so easy, huh? Fucking mama. They just, and the dams are shitting their pants

losing their minds they are the i i i it's got to be an act right because they know it's constitutionally he did everything you're supposed to do they would have done it faster than trump did it and they're pretending to be outraged shuck schumer is the devil i don't like to pick on jewish people that guy has horns. That guy has fucking horns. And Pelosi's got horns coming out of her fucking vagina and her ass. I mean, fucking people make me sick. Anyways, the great judge Clarence Thomas swore her in last night. Oh, I got the title, Jason, for the show right now. ACB gets straight A's or something like that. I think it's even better than that. I came up

with it when I was laying in bed last night, touching my left nut when I thought I found a lump on it. But boy, it's fucking dark ages. Judge time wasn't a nut. It was just like a backed up shit. So I cured it right there, if you know what I'm saying. 12 handy wipes later. Anyways, Judge Thomas swears in, A.C. Bate. And first of all, I love Judge Thomas. Talk about a guy, guy grew up literally, what was his parents were like cotton farmers or some shit. Crop share, a, literally. I mean, they were touched by slavery and Jim Crow and all that. And this guy goes on to be a Supreme Court justice. And all the lefts call them Uncle Tom.

That just shows you who the real racists are in this country. Nothing more dangerous to them than a black guy who thinks for himself and is super smart. And anyways, this is Judge Thomas swearing in ACB last night. Let's take a look. That I will well and faithfully discharge. That I will well and faithfully discharge. Pause. Oh, boy.

I'm glad she's a Supreme Court justice. They don't talk much. I love this woman, and I do. I admire this person beyond. We'll talk about that in a second. But that voice, Jesus Christ. Thank God she won't get a show on fucking Fox or something. She's got that voice that you hear on a cooking show

while three lesbians are judging a 12-year-old boy for making a black penis cake. Go ahead. The duties of the office on which I am about to enter. The duties of the office on which I am about to enter. So help me God. So help me God. Hear ye! Hear ye!

The court's in session. The court's in session now. Here come the judge. Here come the judge. Right after she got sworn in, Judge Thomas shelled this out. Hey, everybody! We're all going to get laid.

And here's the reaction to the Democrats' reaction to this. Can you imagine? That father had, what, 19 little girls? Oh, my God. You fuck, I would leave my wife. I'd move to fucking Alaska, pretend it didn't happen. Oh, my God. Anyways, you got to admire, even the left just shut up, and they, you know, knew.

This woman is impeccable. And I say this, you know me. I'm like a bit of a fucker. I'm no feminist but this woman has seven kids we've talked about this two of them adopted from Haiti one of them with special needs imagine that bringing that into your life and she has a kid who was born with I think down syndrome or whatever of her own can you imagine having all that to deal with and being smart enough to be a Supreme Court justice yeah let's attack her she sounds like a real piece of garbage she might have more integrity

than anybody's ever sitting on the court unless we find out she cheated with like you know Tom Selleck back in the I don't know but have you guys I watched my sisters with their kids growing up I go I made the right choice I would have drowned six of them in a tub. I fucking, how do you do it? All the feminists on the left, the Hillary, I'm not going to stay home and bake cookies. Yeah, well, you know what? She did both.

She did both. Can you imagine being that smart and efficient? I can't. I'm a goddamn comic. I can get up anytime I want for the last 30 years. I've never had a boss and I still suck. Jesus. Seriously. Look at Trump. He's. Anyways, is that a Bible or is that the Koran she put her hand on? Like fucking the guy in Minnesota, Ellison. Piece of gabage.

Anyway, so she got sworn in last night and you know, even the left is like, this fucking girl's perfect. What are we going to do? They're going to look like Mama Luke's. Like what? Mama Luke's. Mama Luke of the year. So, good for you, ACB. Good for you.

Don't take no shit off nobody. And they're all shit in their pants because they think the reason they were so hardcore getting her in so she could overturn, you know what, Obamacare. I don't get it. She makes it 6-3, right? Conservatives to libs on the. Couldn't they have done that even with a 5-3 margin or whatever the 5-4 right so what are you talking about what do you what's the matter with you what's the matter with you the fuck's the matter get it out of here take it back i don't give a fuck where you get it out

of here that's me on christmas because my wife you know buys me christmas gifts but i actually paid for them i'm like the fuck did I tell you not to buy anything too expensive? Get it out of here. Yeah, but I used your credit card. I don't give a shit what you're going to get. Wise of me. I'm fucking freezing. Jace, kill that air.

I'm serious. I feel like a nine-year-old woman in a nursing home. You know, you walk into a room, it's 111 Kelvin, and you're like, turn it up some more. walk into a room, it's 111 Kelvin, and you're like, turn it up some more. Anyway, speaking of the Supreme Court, Mr. Trump, President of the United States, actually had the Supreme Court rule in his favor. This had to do with Wisconsin, I believe, Wisconsin. I always put a T on the internet because I'm black, you know what I'm saying? The Supreme Court on Monday, and this is evening, voted five to three against Democrats who were pushing to extend their cheating ways. The deadline for counting absentee ballots in Wisconsin by six days in order to provide the state or the Dems with more time to deal with the surge in mail-in voting caused by COVID-19 pandemic. Jason, are you talking to your girlfriend?

I always have to do that. I just need your attention. My parents never fucking loved me. As a result of the Supreme Court decision, ballots will have to be delivered by 8 p.m. Get this, how outrageous this is. On November 3rd to be counted. On the actual day we vote. How outrageous. Oh my God, it's a ploy by the fucking... Have you ever seen such stress on absentee and mail-in ballots? You guys, can you smell the coffee?

Wake up! Jesus H- all fucking mighty the court's eight justices divided along partisan lines naturally with the courts uh the court's three democrat appointees in dissent because they're in on the fucking thing but guess what you lost cocksuckers look at trump this fuck donald do you have about covet uh the top court's order followed a ruling from district court judge bill conley seen here there's the liberal cheese eating dick fucking fruit cup standing next to books he's never read in his fucking life. Asswipe. He's at a library probably, some fucking...

Anyways, he, last month, extended the state's absentee ballot counting deadline in response to a suit from the Democratic National Committee and its allies. Conley cited the unusual high number of ballots cast by mail as well as delays with the Postal Service. And that's why he extended it. And if you believe that, I got a bridge to build on the highway over there. Stop getting cunty. stop getting cocky exactly so this guy i'm sure he's a dem all in huh all in on it bill look at you i'm glad somebody beat the fuck out of you in third grade and if i see one picture of sarah silverman i'm just gonna choke my fucking her throat something somebody i do something mean somebody fill it in a similar six-day extension that was

in place for wisconsin's april elections resulted in get this 80 000 ballots being counted that otherwise would have been disqualified or five percent of the total ballots according to the wisconsin elections commission so once again the goddamn fix is in and uh thank god the supreme court woke the fuck up. I wonder how, boy, hasn't Roberts been a fucking disappointment? A panel of the 7th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals blocked Conley's ruling early in October. The Democrats appealed to the Supreme Court to reverse the appeals court ruling. But guess what? The justices said, kiss my asses.

They declined to do so. How do you like that, Dems? So we win one. It's all a farce, folks. I don't give a rat's ass. I'm going to do a story later in the show. The big headline, Fox News has a bunch of people that have COVID. Oh, let me get this straight.

No high profile Democrat politician that I know of, maybe one a few months ago, I don't know, I can think of has COVID. Just the Republicans. Nobody at MSNBC, CNN, ABC, CBS has COVID. Again, maybe one or two. Headlines, Fox. Because, you know, they're the station that doesn't wear masks. They're like Trump.

If you guys don't, as my buddy said, my great buddy Zook, great quote about all this shit. He goes, nothing, he says, nothing falls apart this perfectly. You know how everything's just crumbling? Chaos doesn't happen. Bad things don't happen this perfectly. You know how everything's just crumbling? Chaos doesn't happen. Bad things don't happen this perfectly. Same with good things. It's a good quote.

I'm going to put it on my headstone. But he's right. This is so, I feel like you could steal their playbook. Just like, you know, like a football team. You could steal their playbook. The pandemic, that Pelosi,osi that dirty rotten pig face you know her fingerprints are all over the micro fucking scopes in wuhan oh hey remember that picture i should have had you put it up jace i forgot to remember we put a picture up by the guys wearing fans wearing my t-shirts and merchandise and we put up a guy with about a

78 inch bicep i think he was australian turns out and again i didn't put up a guy with about a 78-inch bicep. I think he was Australian. Turns out, and again, I didn't look up. Did you look it up, Jase? His first name's Lee. He's a world famous bodybuilder. I want to say Australia. God damn it. It's funny, my wife had pictures of him.

But Lee said, anyways, a guy, see if you can find it. This guy, Jesus Christ, he made Schwarzenegger look fat in his prime. Anyways, he's a fan of the show, obviously, because he had my shirt on. And you heard me complaining about my weight. Yeah, we have that picture. But I want to picture him on on stage bodybuilding it's fucking frightening anyways he heard me complaining about uh first of all that head doesn't even look like it belongs in that body hey spidey your fucking arms are bigger than your head

hey fuck you tommy but he heard me complaining about my weight i guess and he sent the message on patreon somewhere saying that he can help me with the... And here's the thing, Lee. I'm a former athlete. Shit, I really know about nutrition and shit, but the only way you're going to help me with my diet is to break my stove and fucking hide all the ingredients in the kitchen.

I'm addicted to what they call Little Debbie Cakes. They should change the name of it to Big Nicky Cakes. I mean, fucking... I'm chain chain swallowing these fucking things. Like Nick, why are you bringing this up? Well, on the show today,

I wanted to mix in a little, we do a couple of stories, depressing or whatever. And then we throw in a little, I'm going to try to start doing this a little more. Um, but here's why maybe I'm a little heavy right now. You think this might fucking be doing this

at one in the morning? Like Doug Heffernan? Yeah, that's healthy. Delicious. Thank you. Thank you. Can you fucking imagine? Can you roll that back? Just the crackling. It's like watching porn for me. Yeah, there you go. Each one of those is going to stick in my heart, Val. Just like that. Anyway, I sent that video to Tommy, my manager. At the end of it, I put my face on it, and I just looked. I had never, I had just, my hair was sticking up. I looked 106 he

told me my manager sends back a text he goes that whole video is sexy except for the end when you put your face in it was a sexy video anybody wants that recipe that's right from fucking italy by the way anyways i just i thought i'd throw that in there um, but I enjoy that as much as doing comedy. Holy shit. In our libs eating lids segment tonight. Nice going, Jason. I forgot that was even in there.

Jason's doing quite well as a producer, I have to say. Let's remind some people about Jason. Jason didn't do, he didn't study this shit. Computers, you know but i saw his name when we put look for guys on indeed i think it was and i saw berkel back i go that's a fucking german those guys can fix anything nick that's a stereotype bullshit so i think he does pretty good plus kids guys his age they know the fucking you know i i mean fucking my buddy uh oh my god i think i'm dying of alzheimer's

my black buddy keith robinson you know fucking the brothers are very good with the fucking phones and they got the latest shit i don't understand i don't know how they can afford it these people they make 11 a year and they drive around on bmws i don't know anyways and our libs eat libs like speaking of sauce tampon brand tampax sparked a firestorm on what am i 11 yeah speaking of sauce and the reason i say that remember the comedian who's a nut tj miller is that his name he's crazy he was on a show he was on that show that has to do with high tech on hbo he's so crazy they fired him from the show remember he got called he got busted for calling in a bomb threat on a plane on a train this guy is like my hero. Anyways, to prove I have the fucking, you know, I have the sense of humor of an eighth grader. One of his bits was he does different offbeat characters, he calls it.

He goes, my impression of a girl that doesn't know how to talk delicately about having her period is something. She's at an Italian restaurant with a a friend she gets up to excuse herself she goes i'm going to the ladies room because he was having her period she goes if the waiter comes tell him to hold the marinara i brought my own childish yes funny yes and his other character was he goes my impression of a guy who doesn't know what the term clusterfuck means he goes yeah i picked up his hot waitress last night brought her home and i really clusterfucked her jt miller i love you man i don't know if you're in a straight jacket but anyways back to the story libs eating delicious libs tampon brand tampax sparked a firestorm on social media after it said

that not all people with periods are women that's true i had mine hello Mr. Red. I don't know why they put that in there. I thought that was funny. The, not all periods. The company owned by J.T. Miller, by Procter & Gamble, kind of a big, big, big corporation, shared the message on September 15th, but it has recently sparked fierce debate and gone viral with some bashing the company not for the right reasons, right? Not for, hey, that's ridiculous, because it is ridiculous,

and I have a whole bit about it coming up the next time you see me do stand-up. But this is what kills me. They're getting bashed, but again, for the wrong reasons. The company's being bashed for alienating biological women. That's part of the problem. You can act like a man. What's the matter with you?

What's the matter with me? I'm cranky. My tits are sensitive and I'm having cramps. But this is online. This is some of the shit people posted. Fact, not all women have periods, the tweet says. Yeah, well, find me one that doesn't and I'll leave my wife.

Hello? Not all women have periods. Yeah, they stop the shit when they hit around 50. I'm no doctor, although I play one on the internet. Also a fact, not all people with periods are women. Another fucking lie, let's celebrate the diversity of all people who bleed, how about if I hit you with an axe right in your fucking head, make you bleed, fucking, you can't handle the truth, here's the fact, yeah, you have to be a woman. Okay? A guy who gets woman parts put in him and bleeds

is not a fucking guy! He's a half a fig! Celebrate diversity. Are there any rules anymore? Huh? Any rules for anybody but white, straight men?

Let's celebrate I'm still attracted to high school cheerleaders huh anybody get a problem with that i exaggerate let's go college junior yeah no i'm gonna go back to what i said why should i lie no i'm folks relax out there this is the type of shit that gets you in trouble, Nick. Let's celebrate all the people who bleed. Can you fucking imagine? We know Pelosi's not in there. Anybody? She dried up in the early 60s after she was Miss Chevrolet.

But the tweet prompted some woman to boycott the brand. See, fucking nobody's happy. My vagina's angry. It is. It's pissed off. I know it is. There's blood coming out of its nose. This ad is misogynistic

and advocates erasing women. So goodbye forever, one critic wrote. Oh, that's good. So what are you doing now? Sticking a fucking wow sham up your snatch? What kind of talk is that for a political show? I don't know. Very different, isn't it?

Misogynistic. Erasing women? How does it erase women? I'm so confused right now. It's doing just the opposite. It's saying guys are women. It's making women where women don't exist. It's doing just the opposite. It's saying guys are women. It's making women where women don't exist.

It's celebrating you. I mean, what do you have? Others slam the message as anti-women. What is an anti-women today, huh? You got a nod at everything they say. Yeah, that's true. I'm genuinely interested to know who at Tampax, some woman wrote in,

thought it might be a good idea to gamble your entire client base, biological women. Well, then you're a bigot now. Now you're generalizing, saying biological women are the ones who, how do you know? I use them for everything. I cut my finger. I slap it on. I used to do a bit. My wife came home. I don't remember the bit.

I'm going to forget it now. But she buys everything cheap. She'd come home with like fucking 100 razor blades, 100 razors for like 10 cents. She's like, yeah, but they were on sale. And I'm like, yeah, so are the tampons. I didn't pick my 50 of those. I can tape in my face when I'm done shaving.

Fucking thing's scooping bone marrow out of my... Anyways, yeah, biological woman woman the woman says is the major market uh against this anti-factual and anti-woman uh virtue vomit she said so she's sick of the political correct shit too meanwhile others praise the company this is why we're destined to fail as a species we can't even agree on this. We can't agree on anything. What's a woman? What's a man?

Who bleeds? Who doesn't? Meanwhile, others praise the company for being inclusive of the trans community. Yeah, let's include all six of those people that exist. And blasted those who took issue with the message. I am so tired of you people. I hope you all bleed out. Lovely, look it, here's the quote.

Lovely, as always, to see bigots absolutely bewildered that the world has left them behind in science and didn't permanently freeze during their fifth grade biology class. In 1983, one person wrote, probably a woman who hasn't been fucked forever. Really? Is that what happened? That we're stuck in the past?

Or that you guys are creating new rules that have served us well since the first caveman and cavewoman existed? Which one is it? Just answer me, you bitch, and address you. Yeah, mother, what kind of people are these, Henry? Fucking quiz! you bitch and address you yeah mother what kind of people are these henry fucking quiz oh jason i don't know i don't know some days i feel like i'm having my period uh another person wrote yes yes yes another supporter responded agreeing with the last asshole a million times yes inclusivity hurts no one if

you if you're mad about this let's talk how about let's uh let's say we did and we really don't let's talk yeah let's do it with smoking tampons people do that too by the way they roll weed and tampon remember we did a story on that. Literally, yes, trans men, non-binary people get periods. Trans men. Not men. Trans men. See, like Trans Am. That's where you're losing me. How is that so hard

to understand, one goo gobbler asked. Oh, God. Please give me a call. That's a sick question. You're sick. Fuck it up, man. I'm not sick enough to fuck it up. It's not hard to understand whoever wrote that. It's actually very easy to understand that you are one of these people on the left who can't accept things for the way they are.

You want them the way you want them to be, but that doesn't make it so. Again, I wanted to be a running back for the Chicago Bears when I was in third grade, playing next to Gale Sayers, but I couldn't. I was six and he was 37. They're losing their minds over there. I mean, these are symptoms of people that have lost their mind.

I'm going to vote today. And I'm going to dress in it like all Trump attire. Just see if I can start some shit. Speaking of starting shit, on Friday, the L.A. Times noted that Democrats are nervous about Biden falling behind in the final stretch of the presidential race when it matters most. You got it right, folks. You should be worried. We don't have, we didn't find that quote. Thank you. There's a quote of President Obama. You can look it up where he actually said, this is like six months ago he said it it during the race, the primaries.

He goes, and he was talking to other Democrats, supposedly behind closed doors. I don't know. But he said, don't underestimate Joe Biden's ability to fuck things up. That's a quote from a guy who picked him as his vice president. So they're nervous because you know why? Trump's doing three shows a day. He's like Tony Orlando and Don in Vegas in 1972 after Tie Yellow Ribbon came out. This guy's doing show after show.

Three a day Trump's doing. This prick had the balls yesterday to leave his basement for, I don't know, about an hour. He went to just over the border of Delaware to a small town in Pennsylvania or vice versa from Pennsylvania. I don't know. No, into Pennsylvania to make it look like he actually traveled somewhere. And he was home in time to watch Murder, She Wrote and have his bowl of pastina. Paul showed Trump is chipping away at Biden's lead. Oh, he's more than chipping. He's like a fucking Italian sculptor at this point.

Folks, the numbers are the same. Some of them are better. Remember when he was behind with Hillary in the last few days? He's even closer than he was against Hillary in some of these. Look, you can't stop this guy. I don't care if you hate him or not. Guy is a beast. He's a care if you hate him or not. Guy is a beast. He's a world force to be reckoned with. I'm 58. He's 74. I couldn't do that schedule.

Even when I chatted with his son, that's right, Don Jr. When I went to, he came to Savannah, called me backstage, had a little chat. I said, where do you guys get your energy? I said, I understand band and all those guys probably coke, but where do you guys? No. That's another guy I want to meet. I want him on the show. Okay. Tommy McNote, Steve Bannon is my hero. Anyways, he's chipping away at Biden's leads nationally in battleground states. So this sweat and bullets, as you should be, you lying, cheating whores. There was a legitimate case for jittery nerves. The national polling averages that show Biden with a double-digit lead, you know what they do? They obscure a narrower gap. And the swing state's essential to win 270 electoral votes,

the majority. I think you need 271. The LA Times conceded that. That's the LA Times. That's not exactly a right-wing publication. They added, the specter of a repeat seems to be reflected in everything Democrats are doing, from the panicked tone of fundraising pitches to campaign ads that run as often as get this 65 times a day in key battle ground markets so they're sweating bullets hillary's laughing her balls off because she goes i didn't even bother get off the couch he she knows let me ask you something joey no matter what i do no matter who i fight Joey, no matter what I do, no matter who I fight, I got these little girl hands. You know what that means? No matter what I do, no matter who I fight, I'm never going to be the best.

I'm never going to fight Joe Louis. What the fuck? He's a heavyweight. You're a middleweight. Who gives a fuck? While campaigning in Battleground, Michigan over the weekend, Senator Kamala, i played strong safety in high school harris she's got a neck that makes michelle obama's look like fucking adam schiff's um that's biden's vp pick if you didn't know express concerns about a potential 2016 repeat okay i'll repeat that for you She's nervous. She be nervous up in this. She says,

and this is, I quote Kamala, you know, we all have PTSD, post-traumatic stress disorder from 2016, Harris declared on Sunday. And I would say to you, not we all, maybe all you Democrats, I guess that's what you meant. Democrat operatives are reportedly obsessing over ways in which the former VP could still fuck it up and see his leads in the polls disappear in the final days of the election. And why wouldn't, why would, the guy's never won an election, has he? You're a loser. You'll always be a loser. And she's psychotic, by the way. Not a bad looking broad, I gotta admit. and she's psychotic by the way not a bad looking broad i gotta admit but she's psychotic i i didn't pull the clip up but her giggling somebody asked her if she's

gonna bring socialism to the white house that nervous laugh that liberals do i pointed this out to colin quinn 20 years ago at the comedy cellar i go when you're in an argument with a liberal or a democrat and you get them on a point, they laugh maniacally because it's almost like they realize, oh, my God, I am crazy. Jon Stewart used to do it. Whoever was sitting at that fucking table and you made a good point, they go. president donald trump gained on his democrat challenger joe biden in national polling averages in nine of 12 contested states now who reported that probably a right-wing but no usa today you know the fucking newspaper that has all the colored pie charts and every time you open it it's talking about women's health and nothing i'm interested in. Trump is also gaining ground with minorities.

That'll be black, brown, yellow, purple Indians and Eskimos with one arms and hair-lipped Pakistanis. He's gaining in all those with a significant voting bloc necessary for the dirty Dems to get a victory, as you know. And they're getting nervous that Trump is making, we reported yesterday, he went from 25% on Monday to 46% last week with black people. Don't you see what makes this a great country?

Supposedly the blonde-haired, blue-eyed devil. Huh? Do you see? Black people like him. That's why it's all bullshit, this racial shit. You know why? He's about money and being successful. It's like the black athletes. They go, they get traded.

They go, this is a fucking business. I understand. But I'm going to play the white man, play his game and make the fucking cashish. Ask Ice Cube. You know what we haven't reported on and i'd say in about 11 nanoseconds joe biden doing a gafferini what joe biden should do right after he loses he should put together a two and a half hour

one-man show the screen comes down and it's just him and his gaps do you understand it'll be the funny show on broadway if it was open it wasn't covered with covet vomit you understand he could make a zillion dollars uh my my my my crack producer jason found this biden on kamala's wife he called he called kamala he called this guy doug emhoff kamala's He called this guy, Doug Emhoff, Kamala's wife. He referred to Doug Emhoff as Kamala's wife. This, this election can't happen quick enough.

You wonder why they're sweating bullets. The Dems, this guy can't open his dirty trap without making an asshole of himself. Severely retarded. Biden strikes again. I wrote, check this out. 270. But my wife, Jill, as you know, and Doug Emhoff, Kamala's wife are there.

Kamala will be back later this week, I think on Friday. It's so stupid. It's so stupid. It's so stupid. First of all, he might be on to something. I bet you Kamala really does have a wife. You know what I mean? That's how liberal she is. But I'm sure it's not Doug Emhoff.

Who is he, Jay? I know he's a political figure. Jason? He doesn't give a fuck. Yeah. Jason, I don't give a fuck Let's do some push-ups, Joe Let's see who the strong Motherbug is Time for a little humor to break up

All the heaviness I'm going to actually give you guys a trigger warning on this one It's a little Grotesque. Made me laugh so hard I almost shit my pants. If you're a sports fan like me, you've seen many graphic guys break their leg on a football field, bend it the wrong way, their ankles. This is Joe Theismann, the Joe Theismann incident on steroids or the girly.

And pick anyone where they fucking blow their knees out and shit this made me laugh so goddamn hard it's a fat hillbilly fuck in the backyard not even a pro dress like one and apparently he thinks he's in better shape than he is I want you guys and let it run through the first time all right don't don't but uh keep your eye on his knees when he jumps off the top rope, please. All right. Kill it. Oh, stop. Oh, stop.

Let's take another look at that. Pause. Pause. Oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I don't even know. What am I looking at there, Jace? Is he facing? Is that his back? Which way is he facing? Hurry up, will you? I can't. It's kind of gross. Yeah, he's facing towards the ring and so are his feet, but his knees are going the other way.

Oh, I see. What the fuck? Let's take another look at that in slow motion. Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh All right, go ahead, let it play. Watch his friends just wander over casually. Look at his friends. All right. I just thought I'd throw that in for you people. Make you feel good about your day. I mean, that would be funny if it happened at a WWE event.

This is looking, a makeshift thing. And I hate to say this, but you know, that guy can't vote now for Trump. He was in a fucking wheelchair. Oh, that made my day. I love seeing people get hurt. It makes me, I don't know about little kids and shit, but adults falling down stairs or a bone going the wrong way.

I mean, gee, I jerked off the Theismann's leg when it broke. It was like a relaxation tape. You know how you people fall asleep to white noise? That's how I watch it like that. I play Bobby Knight audio of him screaming at his players and choking them. That makes me sleep. Anyways, that guy's going to be day to day, they said. The guy that sent that video and said, this guy, the guy put in the comment section,

he blew out his ACL, his MCL, his SUV, his DVR. MCL, his SUV, his DVR. That's what we call in comedy a little sugar to make the rest of the show go down. I don't know. Why not? The lady said, I remember when we took this over the first day, I said, and I wasn't even smoking. Well, I was smoking a lot. But I said, can you smoke?

She goes, that's up to you. Well, I guess it is. What did I try to rent this to somebody else? Actually, I've been good, right? It hasn't smelled in here that much. It cuts through what I did in the bathroom three minutes ago, leaving three dead fetuses in a toilet. Hey, Twitter, you know Twitter?

Owned by Jack, I love to swallow goo. Dorsey, you know, he pretends he's got a neutral platform like Zuckerberg and the rest of them. You know what he did? He flagged the President of the United States again for a tweet. You guys, do you understand you're already under martial law or whatever? Socialism, whatever you want to call it. Do you understand it's already happened? Your free speech is gone and whatever.

Twitter, who apparently thinks they're the arbiter of what's true and what's not true. Twitter flagged a Monday night tweet from President Trump that called for a final election total by election day. How dare he? Son of a whore! What is he, an American? Okay, he wants the votes. And he said big problems and discrepancies with mail in ballots all over the United States must have final total on November 3rd. The president tweeted. OK, now here's why they didn't put it up.

The social media company blocked Twitter's users from liking or retweeting Trump's tweet. Again, shitting all over your First Amendment, and provided a reason for flagging the post. Now, here is the reason from these left-wing fascist motherless fucks. Some or all of the content shared in this tweet is disputed and might be misleading about how to participate in an election

or another civic process, read the message from the assholes of the earth. Yeah, how do we prove what he said is true? That's so hard to do. How about looking at New York a couple months ago at a local election or a couple other places? Twitter also included a link, listen to this,

that directs users to stories that report on the safety and security of mail-in voting. They were fucking replacing the truth with their propaganda as the truth. Oh my God, I want them all to die in a fucking house fire. If I could, I'd grab this microphone and I'd beat your brains out with it

because that's what you deserve. That's what you deserve. There's plenty of examples. Early this month, Trump said the voting method poses a larger threat than China or Russia on the outcome of the election.

And I, the next sentence was cut out because it made me so mad. And they said, and again, once again, like I said, I can't find an unbiased article.'d said with no evidence whatsoever to support it and like i said there's about 10 races that you can look around in where they're having troubles with with mail-in balloting and and uh please america you're not that stupid are you more dangerous than china or russia he's right on the goddamn money. You know who's interfering with our elections, folks?

Big tech. Instead of using that to fuck up other countries like other countries do, we use disinformation to fuck up people who vote on the right. That's what we're doing in this country. I kill you. I kill you right now. Kill me. I'm right here. Kill me.

Okay, I come with two chopsticks. I shove up your ass. Two chopsticks? Come over here. Talk to me in the face. Like a somebody. That's my screen name. Like a somebody.

Like a somebody. Like a somebody. By the way, the A4 mentioned Jack Dorsey. We got a picture of him coming out of work. There he is. Does that guy have tits? Or is that just an optical illusion? There's Dorsey.

There he is. And there's a guy in the picture behind him, the last guy that fisted him in a dress. Fucking people. You fucking people. You have no idea how to defend a nation. Here's what I like about Donald Trump. I know you guys know I love him, but here's what I really like about him. He's been saying the same shit, and you guys can Google it, okay? He's been saying the same stuff he was on tv a lot in the 90s because he was you know a new york player and um there's clips of him on oprah saying i think china's ripping us off you know the rest of the world's treating us very

badly we're dopes he was saying that in the fucking 80s okay now here's a clip of him on cnn right um walking out and of course the left puts puts this up online think they're proving a point because he walked out on leslie stall they go he's been known to walk out on other interviews so i found this clip of him being interviewed by charles feldman at cnn back in the uh 1990 and uh it's so what he's saying, this guy, he's been so consistent. And like me and Jason said before the show, it's so funny now when you're when you're a guy who's been consistent with what you say. You are the liar and a fucking psychotic. Everything is upside down. But but here he is. And again, proving that CNN has been chewing on this guy's leg since 1990 but what but trump's a little sharper here but he's still saying the same shit good video what about also those who say that

you're being in recent months awfully thin-skinned i've always been thin-skinned i've been thin-skinned from day one when people pause say something false i love it I've been thin-skinned since day one. Me too. I've lived the same, and my parents hate me for it. They always go, you never let anything slide. I go, I know. You know why? Because I don't provoke anybody.

I don't lie about anybody. And when they do it to me, it feels twice as bad because you started it, and I'll end it. Anybody? That's the one bad thing I said to Donald Jr. And I'll end it. Anybody? That's the one bad thing I said to Donald Jr. when I was interviewed. Remember, I go, I'm just like your father. I'll be at the mall with a 10-year-old girl staring at me. I'll go, what the fuck are you looking at?

Donald Jr. goes, well, look, he's not that bad. I'm the same way. Don't threaten me. Don't provoke me. You should all live your lives like that. And if you do, I'm going to give it to you. Go ahead. Let him fuck it. I attack those people

because the news gets away with murder. The news media, they get away with murder. Pause. They get away with murder. All of a sudden he sounds like Bernie. They get away with murder. The 100% get away with murder. This is CNN, the most trusted

name in news. Okay, we got more of them. In terms of libel laws, because the media is so protected, and it's ridiculous that they're so protected, but they can write virtually anything. The difference is, with me, at least they pay some price, and I think more people should have that attitude, and I think you'd find a lot more accurate reporting, including yours. Oh, what was inaccurate so far? I thought your demeanor was inaccurate. I thought that questions that you were posing to people in my organization were inaccurate and false and unfair. Well, questions by definition can't be inaccurate.

The questions... And he's right. The guy's right, but what he's saying is they're loaded questions. He's not the most articulate guy. But I know I fucking love that he's sticking it right up there. And they've been fucking sticking up his ass forever. Go ahead. Themselves were put in such a way that made them statements. And they became statements as opposed to questions. And I think that's not good reporting. It doesn't matter. I mean, I don't think your views would be very interesting. Nor do I want to embarrass you. I don't think I views would be very interesting in it, nor do I want to embarrass you.

I don't think I would be, Bill. Let's talk about... I don't think I would be. Spoken like a true CNN journalist, because you're shameless, you can't embarrass these fucking people. Go ahead. What we talked about yesterday. Look, look, pause.

You see him look over at his, whoever his press guy was over there? You see, you see this fucking guy. Me and my buddy were taught watching Trump doing his rallies. And my buddy goes, I keep waiting for him. And he comes this close every time. He'll be like, now, how about this governor? You guys got this fucking guy. You know, he's going to slip.

I'm hanging on it now. This is my friend pointed it out. Go ahead. The financial community I'm talking about. And we talked about this on the phone who have said, and this is them saying it, not me. This is them? What do you mean by them? This is one or two people, and what about the positive people?

Five or six. But the ones who said negative things and... Here we are. Well, we've got to talk about that. Back to the negative. Back to the negative. Back to the... You know what?

Do this interview with somebody else. We talked about this yesterday on the phone. This is exactly what we talked about. Do the interview with somebody else. Really. Yeah, you don't need this. this interview with somebody else. We talked about this yesterday on the phone. This is exactly what we talked about. Do the interview with somebody else, really. Yeah, you don't need this. Do it with somebody else. Have a good time. Because frankly, you're a very negative guy,

and I think it's a very unfair recording. Good luck. I'll just be with you. Sorry you feel that way. All righty then. I don't know if you guys noticed the background of the interview. It looks like they were doing it at that car dealership in Scarface. We're fucking.

There's a palm tree in the background. Anyways, I just fucking love it. Can you stay categorical? You are fake news, sir. I don't need this. this well could you point out specifically no it doesn't matter I don't want to embarrass you they've been against him since day fucking 19

you know why he's a rich white guy that doesn't fly well at CNN I walked out on an interview once a job interview I realized I had coffee all over my shirt. I went, oh, fuck. I didn't want to sell pork bellies anyway. That's the first job interview I went to, selling futures. Why? You know, when you get out of college, you want to make money right away? It said, and this was back in the 80s, you can make $20,000, $30,000 a fucking week or something, you know, selling pork bellies. I drove all the way, Route 128, Massachusetts, rush hour,

and boy, I was out of my league. So I went from that, and what job did I take about two days later? Selling meat door to door out of the back of an Azuzu pickup truck, which I was very good at. And I still say I'm eventually I'm going to write a show about it. There's sex involved. There's fucking alcoholics, Vietnam vets. Oh, it's like Glenn Gary, Glenn Ross meets taxi. So as I mentioned before, Fox News, this was a big headline, staffers.

Jason, it says S-T-F-F-E-R, stifers, test positive for COVID. And the reason I'm putting this in here is just, again, to wake you people up. Fox News leadership announced in an internal memo Monday, if it's internal, how the fuck's it gonna, that several staffers have tested positive for the coronavirus. A development that has sent top anchors and executives into quarantine

and prompted the network to reduce its in-person workforce. Well, I'm pissed off some guys, I'm sure, you know. We'll do it live. Okay. We'll do it live. Fuck it. Do it live. I'll write it and we'll do it live okay we'll do it live fuck it do it live i can i'll write it and we'll do it live

i put on tucker last night i go why is the picture i just bought a 75 inch high depth and he looked like it was on channel 2 in 1968 it was a horrible picture and uh so i was up on the fixing my antenna last night but uh it turns out he was doing a remote thing. And I'm like, why is he? And it turns out this is what it's about. A number of top figures at Fox News, they're under quarantine after a passenger on the network's private flight from the final presidential debate in Nashville back to New York tested positive. The group of passengers included Fox News media president Jay Wallace, some old lady from Wuhan with a roost on her lap, chief political anchor Brett Baier, and my girl Martha McCallum. If she has a fever, I'll take care of her nice.

And two of the hosts of The Five, one of them was Dana Perino. I love you for helping me to construct my life. Not a tavern, but a temple. I love you because you have done so much to make me happy. A white dress. And who else is on the plane oh i'm probably guessing this is who fucking gave it to everybody one williams pictured here you got him dumbest man on tv nice guy but as dumb as the day is fucking long. Anyways, the internal memo said, we wanted to inform you about recent developments of a few positive COVID-19 cases at Fox News Media.

Wallace and Fox News Media CEO, Suzanne Scott, wrote an internal memo. This is a reminder that any employee who has tested positive will be quarantining and following all of our mandatory guidelines before they enter any of our buildings. And I've been in the building at 12, 11. The anchors will be under quarantine until they test negative three times in a row. What is this, the fucking NFL? Three times in a row. Come on. That's faggot stuff. You want to call it by its

name? That's strictly for fags. Of course, the Washington Post reported this on Monday. The outbreak at the cable news network comes just eight days before the presidential election. Now, many Fox News shows and anchors have been working remotely since the network sent non-production staff home in March. non-production staff home in March. The Five, you know that show, returned to a distant studio in September, joining several other Fox News shows that have cautiously returned

to Fox News headquarters. How fucking funny, huh? Now, you know, why am I doing this story? Are you going to tell me, people? So it's only Fox News, which, by the way, you know, is more fair than anybody. But, of course, they have this conservative media reputation.

Only them. You know, the Trump channel. The people that don't wear. Only Fox News people got COVID. Nobody at MSNBC. Again, I might be wrong. CNN, anybody? Don Lemon, while you're fucking chopping on your boy's ass? CNN? Anybody? Don Lemon? While you're fucking chomping on your boy's ass? Huh? You want me to believe only Fox News and only Republican Congress people have gotten COVID? Do you guys

see how the fix is in? Please nod your heads. Not you, Jay. The people at home sitting on the toilet listening to me speaking of fox news my favorite fruitcake shep smith i've told the story many times about me and him having a run-in no it wasn't in a steam room at the new york city y um um but shep smith as you know left fox news abruptly months ago and he came back this week or a couple of weeks ago on CNBC with his own show. He's just going to do straight news with with no bias. There he is there with a beautiful head of hair. I suck cock and I love it. Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy.

We all know why he really left. There's too many hot broads and made him very nervous. Since its launch on September 30th, CNBC's The News with Shep Smith has presented a sleek, hard news program with big name guests like Dr. Anthony. I haven't got one yet. Right. Fauci. All while facing continued decline in viewership. Listen to this. I think our show gets more watches, bringing in an average of 343,000 total views in its first week.

It's in a whole week, Nielsen Ratings said. The show dropped to 268,000 in its third and is set to continue to decline for week four. It's falling like a goddamn, you know why? Because the rest of the Fox News, he was a token fruit cup, okay? The rest of his coworkers carried him because he's full of shit. The 25 through 54 age demo ratings,

he was looking for 13, between 13 and 18 years old, have been significantly lower going from a meager 58,000 average viewers in the show's debut to just 48,000 a week later. Between September 30th and October 22nd, the news with Shep Smith was at the bottom of the 7 p.m. cable news ratings. Get this.

Behind MSNBC's Joy I Hate White People read cnn's aaron burnett and fox news's martha mckellum with an average of 272 000 viewers that's 10 000 less than reruns of the electric Shep, how's it going over there? Quiet, quiet like a bitch As you guys know, I'm back on the road Doing what I've done for the past 33 years And proving that COVID is bullshit Next weekend I'll be at the Comedy Club of Kansas City On Friday and Saturday, November 6th and 7th If you're in the area, come on out.

It's a great club. I did it a few months back. On November 19th, I'll be at the Improv in Raleigh, North Carolina. And then I'll be back in Las Vegas at the Plaza Hotel and Casino on Friday, November 20th, and Saturday, November 21st, doing one show each night. Get tickets to all these shows through my website, nickdip.com and click on touring. And I will see you at the clubs. You know what?

I'll throw one more thing in. Here's a clip. Somebody sent me that I played football with in college real quick. I don't know. I I'm like uncle Rico in Napoleon dynamite. We could have won state if they but my buddy sent me a clip of me uh university man we played rhode island i've said this on the show before we played rhode island in 1982 we were the first uh college game to use the new overtime rule we get the ball to 25 or whatever it was implemented that day so we were the first we lost rhode island in five overtimes like 55 to 51 or some shit it's in the college hall of fame anyways

because that was such a great game the next year we opened against Rhode Island and they put it on CBS regional coverage now this um this footage has kind of deteriorated since it's been on my phone for a couple months but um this is your humble correspondent catching a nice 35, 40-yard pass over the middle from my roommate, Richard Labonte, all-conference quarterback. Let's take a look at this. Labonte, second down, 26 minutes. Again, trying to roll out. Got a man! It's complete. Yeah, bitch.

Yeah. Run through a motherfucker face. God damn it. I got a clearer one at home, I think. And I didn't start that game. It was a big controversy. Had this kid in front of me. I swear to God, my fucking, even back then, I think politics played.

My coach was in love with this black running back who was the most average athlete on the team. And by the fucking, by halftime, he was out. I was fuming. That's right. The guy didn't like me. That coach did not like me. Thought I was a wise ass. I mean, where do you get that idea?

He caught me doing an impression of him this is true the week before i'm at the chalkboard you know i have offensive meetings he i'm up there my my buddies are sitting in like you know classroom seats and i'm doing an he had like a shitty connecticut accent they're you know you know he fucking i look over he's standing in the doorway. I give him credit. He gave me a wry smile. But anyways, I just thought I'd throw that in there. Here are people I want to thank that contributed to nickdip.com. We got Patrick Dunn from California.

We have Greg Barry from Florida. We have Michael League, Illinois. We have Tim Hersheied, Ohio. We have Dick Napalo, Florida, and new monthly supporter. We have one Scott Roberts has signed up at patreon.com. I wish you guys would do the same. Thank you guys so much for contributing to the show. You do keep us on the air. You have to know that we have a Patreon question. Again, if you're a Patreon member, this is one of the benefits that you get to do that. Ryan Evgen, Hennepin County, Minnesota. Hennepin, can you speak on the nationwide ammo shortage? There's got to be some serious fuckery going on there. Give us some juice, buddy. Who am I, fucking the rifle man?

I wish I, this guy's talking to me like I like i'm a fucking gun investor um yeah i can speak well i'll give you my theory ryan how about the whole world knows the shit's gonna go down on november 3rd or whenever we get the results of the election and as you know how many nra members are there in this country 100 million or some shit what I mean? I'm pretty sure they'd go up. And you're right, man. I go to stores. You go to a fucking Bass Pro Shop or some armory and you go to the fucking ammunition aisle

and the cupboards look like Walmart after the COVID hit. The toilet paper shelves, empty. It's like a box of, it's like fucking, I don't know, Rosie O'Donnell went to fucking whatever, there's two Snickers bar left. Anyways, I think that's what's good. And there is some fuckery

because they're probably taxing the, or they will be taxing it. But I think, Ryan, I think it's a supply and demand thing. I really think people have, you know, I mean, look at the gun sales. People who are buying those are buying ammo. So that, that would be my first guess, Ryan. But good question, buddy. And you probably know more than I do. I live in Minnesota. Probably shooting squirrels for breakfast and shit. That is it. Thank you guys so much again for your support.

Remember cameo.com. If you want me to roast one of your friends, go to cameo.com. I will make a personal video message and destroy whoever you'd like to destroy. Remember, you guys think it. I will say it. You're very welcome. We'll see you back here tomorrow. Have a good day, everybody. guitar solo I'm out.