The Nick DiPaolo Show - DJT Kills it At MSG! | Nick Di Paolo Show #1644

Episode Date: October 28, 2024

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about Trump's Madison Square Garden rally and more! Support the show and download the DraftKings app with code NICKDIPSHOW. New players can play just 5 bucks & get $50 instantly in Casino Credits. Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! SEE NICK LIVE: 11/9/24 – Bridge View Center Theater – Ottumwa, IA 2/20/2025 -- Bricktown Comedy Club – Tulsa, OK TIX:  https://www.nickdip.com/tour  For Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com

Music playing I'm running through a motherfucker face. English major, Marshawn Lynch. Went to college, I'm sure he did well. Hey, how are ya folks? I gotta look into the camera, instead of looking at my beautiful face. Rotting teeth, giant forehead, it's over. It's over, Johnny, it's over.

It's not over! I'll do that for ya in full sometime. Hi folks, welcome to the show. On a Monday morning, what else? Halloween's coming up, so don't forget to buy your razor blades and your fruit. I have to repeat the joke every year, but it's my favorite Halloween joke by one of my favorite

comedians, Harlan Williams, Canadian guy, very funny. I'll tell you, I grew up in a, I loved Halloween, I grew up in a very rich neighborhood though. One year I got an apple with a razor in it, it was electric. Good to be with you, great weekend. Again, late on the couch like I was Stephen Hawking, blinking to have my wife bring me food. College football. I recorded.

I don't know, my DVR blew up. Blue smoke was coming out. College football. NFL football. The World Series, which is so frigging good. NHL hockey. UFC, UFC. I had so much that I had to get up yesterday and watch the UFC thing that I paid for. I'm a sports fan, I'm 62, I don't feel guilty about laying around like an ass.

I worked out twice, give me some credit I walked around Forsyth Park here in Savannah didn't know it was pride afternoon Jesus I wanted to put rings in my nipples and dye my asshole hairs purple and but good for them I'm all fart I'm all for being proud of some you had nothing to do with it I guess I I guess I'll move on before I get this part of the show. Psh. We're supposed to mark down the funny parts, remember? Because I get social media now.

So you know I'm not going to remember. Just write down a time. I don't know if you and I find the same shit money, but I can't complain. Anyhow, where's that thing that helps me? Wow. Guys, we're doing a story later on about Ozempic being good for dementia. I think I just proved that wrong. I left the house with no pants on today. But that had nothing to do with my memory. It had something to do with a coed jogging by the house. Cocaine. It's great. It's shit. All right, folks. Let's get to it. I turn this thing into this

show has got a lot of coverage about Trump's rally yesterday at Madison Square Garden. I didn't plan on it, the show being about that, but with each passing hour I was going online and there were so many good speakers I only took a few that I found interesting. There was a ton of them. I didn't get dr. Phil and Hulk Hogan and Some other big ones I just Stuck with the ones I found interesting, but do you understand yesterday? Do you understand what took place? It's really a watershed moment You know New York City and and we're gonna show a clip of Tucker Carlson, which is ruining my opening because he's he's so eloquent It was a nine minute clip. We'll show you a couple minutes

he just he just summed it up what Trump why Trump's so valuable and Basically said he liberated us from all this PC bullshit and it's really true New York City folks it's bluer than my nuts on prom night you understand if you understand that and that's the city where they were trying to L save it for Tucker but bottom line they sold out Madison Square Garden 19,500 people 75,000 outside waiting to get in. Gee, I wonder if Kamala could do that without Beyonce rubbing her ass all over the place and bringing in you know Louis Armstrong's sister to tap dance and all that other horse shit. Huh? How about a hundred that New York City folks the garden was at capacity 19,500 for Trump rally Sunday even the Knicks are going how does he do

it the NYPD said there was another 74 75 K 75 K that was their estimates outside which that's mind-blowing it's it's as you know I'd lived in New York City it doesn't get any bluer and and you know just just think about that happening four years ago eight years ago six years you can't tell me. I mean, and of course MSNBC has to, and I knew they were going to go there right away. I think, I don't know if it was Hitler, I think it was Hitler actually at Madison Square Garden in the 30s or whatever. Anyways it was packed in front of a bunch of Nazis and know, Nazis. And of course, MSNBC saw this and had the nerve to splice

clips from Hitler's old speech in with this. Joe Scarborough, I hope you get cancer tonight. And they go, you got till Thursday. And take your parrot with you, Mika. Retard. How friggin'gin dare you and that's why you're getting smoked because you're calling you don't just call Trump him you call everybody in there Nazis and that's the difference have you ever heard Trump bad-mouthing people who vote Democrat now you haven't he's not even a

full-blown conservative for Christ you guys you're cutting your own throat some boy we but everybody was there and to prove that he's not even a full-blown conservative for Christ. You guys, you're cutting your own throats and boy are we. But everybody was there and to prove that he's not Hitler and the supporters aren't Hitler youth, how about there was Jews there? That's right, real Jews from New York. Orthodox, practicing people who are kind of practicing somebody, Jews who mispractice. a kind of practice in somebody Jews who miss practice some who are in triple-a moving up some of the miners do you understand that there were Jews there it's got to kill my friend Andy Kindler and whoever else self-hating Jews it is it's got to kill him can you imagine there was a Holocaust survivor there a Holocaust survivor at a Trump rally supporting

Trump but Trump's Hitler you guys on the let you couldn't have fucked this up anymore I have receipts as they say now or video clips of and like I'll say it again I lived in New York City never had a problem with Jewish people I'm not just saying that to kiss ass I you know I mean well I wasn't show business what do you mean by that you know what I mean no I mean there was stand-up comics with Jewish who I fucking with friend David tells weird I know he thinks I'm a Nazi but I like him. He like, pretends to like me at least so I don't know. Um but they have to be, I'm sure Tell is not one of these self-hating. Why am I bringing up them? I don't know, it just came to mind.

John Stewart I like, I don't think he's happy with the left. Anyways here's proof that there was some Jews there. Oh that's the beginning I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm doing today. Look at that though. They're chanting USA USA and of course Joe Scarborough with his hillbilly eyes and his fucking idiot friend. Nazi Hitler blah blah blah. Now here's the clip. Only New York. The guy's got an accent interviewing him. Right? He's from Ireland to England. This is why I gotta love New York. Now if you don't believe those are Jews you'll see the Israeli flag in the back. But listen this is pretty pretty cool. This week we were told by the Democrats that Trump is a Nazi.

What are you guys doing in line? Right here. So the fact that Trump's, that they're saying that shows the ignorance and what they think, it is complete disgrace. They have no right to say that. Trump did nothing wrong. He's a good guy. He supports the Jewish community.

He supports Israel. Not like the other side all talk talk but they're not they do not do the walk it's about time we go all order peace stability in this country how we bring the world to a safer place what what what those were some tough jews

uh... first of all they do have a right to say that shit about Trump. That's the beauty of this country. You can say all you want and then live with the consequences. And it ain't looking pretty right now. And again, don't fool yourselves, folks. I know the Republicans are on a run, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, but they tried to kill Trump. Remember that. So what do you think? They're shy and they don't care how it looks if he's ahead in every poll, they're going to try to steal it. Quote me on that. Too big to rig doesn't exist in my opinion, but they'll come up with some legal horse shit or whatever.

But think about it. Just think about that. There was actually a few Muslims at the rally, inside, for Trump, with the hejibs on and the hats and the fucking towelettes. I don't know what the fuck you call them. Anyhow, and can you imagine? The fucking right is everything the left wanted to be. Yeah. You know what this is? I was thinking Kamala is the ultimate DEI hire. It's the left's wet dream. They couldn't have picked anybody worse. I love it. It just shows

you what it just proves DEI is against who? A white guy. A white guy? I don't like mosquitoes. white guy. I don't like mosquitoes. I don't like them. I gotta get new headphones. This thing's fucking cracking and or it's this I don't know. Anyways that's what it is though. You got the white guy the old rich white guy that the left can't fucken see. He represents everything they hate against everything they love, the DEI high, and it's a smoke show. Hopefully they will get back to a meritocracy. So you got the, he's such a Hitler, big Jewish, and they were Orthodox Jews here, like I said. Earlier in the evening, Tony Hinchcliffe,

he's a comedian who very popular killed Tony I think as his podcast. I met him for the first time a couple, you know, three weeks ago at Skankfest and he said, I fucking love you. I used to hear you on Stern and it affected my comedy. I mean, exact words he said to me and I'm sitting here watching going, this motherfucker is at Madison's. How did I fuck this up? I was the lead, folks. I'm not blowing my own horn, but anybody can tell you. I was the fucking lead guy on this shit.

And I like this kid. I met him for five minutes at least. I think he's gay. I'm not even sure. I never hear. I'm pretty sure. It doesn't fucking matter. So he goes on early in the evening and he does

what I think comics should do and he should have felt safe because again it's a Trump rally. His magic comedian Tony Hingcliffe, he sparked a fierce outrage apparently after hurling insults. Again, this is the media hurling insults against Latinos in is the media, hurling insults against Latinos in a series of purported jokes during his, we'll decide not you people who write the article, opener at the Trump rally in Madison Square Garden and I'll just show you the, this is supposed to be the big controversy, he made some great jokes about Latinos and was getting big laughs because Latinos do have a sense of humor and then he did this Puerto Rican thing

Which again, it's the paper saying it was so controversial, but I liked it. Here we go There's a lot going on like I don't know if you guys know this there's literally a floating island of garbage in the middle of the ocean right now Yeah, I think it's called Puerto Rico in the middle of the ocean right now. Yeah. I think it's called Puerto Rico. Stay still! Don't eat shit, you fucking bitch! Don't get this on your nose! You bitch!

That lady liked it. Or hated it. He added, it's wild, and these Latinos love making babies too. Just know that They don't do that What? Did I is that right my reading that right? It's wild and he's like, you know, love making babies to just know that they don't do that

They come in. Oh, they don't there's something about pulling out but that they didn't put in the article. That's what he said They don't pull out. He goes they don't Know pulling out. He says they come inside just like they did to our country. I Know Republicans of the party with a good sense of humor hinge cliff 40 Cackled after taking the swipe which drew some laughter mixed with unease and some ooh 12 people out of 19,000 got their panties in a bite in some corners of the venue. Some of the guests that later took the stage later praised Hispanic and Latino voters

and underscored the importance of the voting block to form President Trump's chances of victory on November 5th. And I say to those people who tried to clean up his mess, Will you shut up? Will you? Will you please shut up? Why do I say that? And this is very important, it's why I chose this story.

If you're a Trump fan, you're supposedly all for free speech, okay? The fact that somebody went up there, some politicians, and had to, you know, ooh, almost apologize without apologizing, shows that they don't get it yet either. You understand? This is what we're fighting for, our right to make jokes like that without repercussions of being canceled and all that horse shit. And there were Latinos there. I saw a Puerto Rican girl online after, made a selfie of herself going, and it was later on, she was at home, but saying that doesn't bother her. goes I'm Puerto Rican it

didn't bother me and it doesn't you know we have a sense of humor and we have to that's what you're fighting for folks that's like when I watch Gutfeld and he'll do an off-color line and that place goes whoa they still don't get it yet until the whoa stops and the theizing. You're never going to have true freedom. I had to show that. And I think Tony did a great job. And he told me I can come on a show anytime. Maybe it's my problem.

But he's in Austin. Yuck. But I go to Dallas. I should jump, right? All right, I'm an asshole. It's official hey folks got a question got an appetite for excitement fill up on a sauce boss barbecue the newest exclusive slot game from DraftKings casino play for mouth-watering

wins and check out one-of-a- kind features like the collection multiplier in progress saving. New players play just 5 bucks and score 50 instantly in casino credits. Download the DraftKings Casino app and sign up with the code Nick Dipshow. Then get a taste of Sauce Boss BBQ exclusively on Draft Kings Casino. The crown is yours. 21 and over physically present in Connecticut, Michigan, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia only void in Ontario eligibility and other restrictions apply one offer per new casino customer casino credits are non-withdrawable and expire in 168 hours terms at casino draft kings.com slash get 50 ends October 6 2024. It's like those airplane announcements, they're getting longer each year. You sit on the plane and they just. It's got to be five solid minutes.

You can't light a campfire in the bathroom on a plane. There's a list of stuff. Please know. And if I hear the thing about open the thing carefully, when you're in your seats, make sure you're buckled up. It goes on for 10 minutes. Don't touch peanuts. And people are allergic to those.

If somebody's got a mask, respect that. But if you got a poop, let us wipe you. And then they go, enjoy your flight. Okay, I'll just sit here like a mummy. And then they come on 30 seconds later and go at it again. That's right. And then once you reach cruising altitude, they go at it again. That's right. Which is so funny folks, because if there's any real problem at 30,000 feet, all those rules go out the window. Like Mike Tyson said, when everybody has a plant that you get punched in the mouth. And I would say heading into the ocean at 40,000 miles

an hour is a punch in the mouth. I'm going to use the fat guy next to me for a fucking flotation device. Who's with me? Anybody? Hey folks, before I move along, those of you on Mug Club, stick around for the rest of the show. The rest of you go to nickdip.com and sign up for Mug Club. You'll get this entire show. You know you're heartbroken you have to leave, right? You'll get this entire, Steven Crowder's entire show, which is a couple hours long and is filled with information that you can fact check and laughs and it's like I said MGM production it's amazing and also you have Alex Jones pops in and out as his guest Brian Callan has a show on Mug Club and they have an undercover

team that's already broken two national stories and there's more to come and with the election next week or whenever it is they have people on the ground everywhere everywhere like every state I don't know how he does it but uh you want to do that so also when you're at Nick dip dot clump clump yes click on the claw dates it could be happily click on the tour dates November 9th which is right around the corner already. Bridgeview Center Theater, Tomahaw, Iowa. I will be at the Bridgeview Theater on November 9th. Please show up.

It'll be a blast. Second half of the show. New date. Oh, I got a new date? Jesus, they didn't tell me that. I'm the last one to know my own. February 20th, thank you. February 20th, Brick Town Comedy Club, Tulsa, Oklahoma.

Brick Town Comedy Club, February 20th of 2025, Tulsa, Oklahoma. I got in trouble there years ago, 15 years ago, on morning radio. I think it was Tulsa. Or Roberts University is, isn't it? Or one of those. It's a school that has the big giant praying hands in front of it like a statue 40 feet high. And I was on the radio and I go, yeah, they had to put a dick in one of those hands and let

tourists know what they're gonna be doing while they're here for a week. Oh, the phones lit up. That's what they said to me. They were like, oh yeah, the phones lit up alright. And then they said to me they were they were like oh yeah the phones lit up all right and then they yelled at me hi good night everybody Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm out. you