The Nick DiPaolo Show - Fauci The Fraud Fried | The Nick Di Paolo Show #1930

Episode Date: July 30, 2026

In today's episode Nick talks about Fauci Pleads Fifth, Weaponized Sandwiches, A Two Headed Gecko, WNBA Owner Loses Mind, WNBA Ratings, Libtard Brewer Loses Permits and A Bumbled Second Chance! The FULL SHOW is live streaming & FREE-ONLY on Rumble! Join our LIVE CHAT at 6pm ET every Mon-Thu or watch the FULL EPISODE anytime on demand after 7pm ET. Follow my Channel and get notified! https://rumble.com/c/TheNickDiPaoloShow GET TOUR DATES & TICKETS - https://www.nickdip.com/tour NOVEMBER 5TH - The Punchline: ATLANTA, GA NOVEMBER 6TH - Rivers Casino: PHILADELPHIA, PA NOVEMBER 7TH - Soul Joel's: POTTSTOWN, PA MERCH - Grab some mugs, hats, hoodies, shirts, stickers etc… https://shop.nickdip.com/ PERSONAL VIDEO FROM ME – Send someone a personal video from me! Go to https://shoutout.us/nickdipaolo  or www.cameo.com/nickdipaolo SOCIALS/COMEDY- Follow me on Socials or Stream some of my Comedy!  https://nickdipaolo.komi.io/

What can I say it's on my mind? I meant to hold on. I got to turn the volume on this fucker. Oh, I got to tell them about what happened to my other one. They'll get a kick out of that, the fans. There we go. How are you, folks? Welcome to some show that I'm trying to do.

Sure it'll be great. Good to be here. Try the veal. Your sister's ass. This is a new iPad. I last week it was last week

couldn't find the fucker for a couple days and I'm like what the fuck it's either going to be in the studio God fucking damn it what time you got

oh all right I ain't bet I'm like where the hell's the goddamn iPad it's got to be in I left in a studio it's got to be at my house

one of the other and it wasn't at either excuse me but luckily I had that thing that tracks, it's for old people. No, it's for everybody. You know, find my wife.

She was at Terrell Sugg's house. Lying around the blog. You know, find my iPad or whatever to fuck. So I checked that and it says it's at a firehouse in the town that we do the show it, which isn't that nice in time. And I go, now wait a minute. Even before that, even before I knew that, I said, maybe I put it on the roof of my car. Sometimes I go out, I have two things in my hand, and I put it on, you know what I mean?

And, come on, I left the house, like, again, today without the teeth, so that's nothing. New. So I go, yeah, maybe it, anyways, check the thing, and it says it's at a firehouse about a mile and a half from here. So I get my car and I go over there and walk in the firehouse. I'm waiting for somebody to go, hey, what are you doing? I could have taken a truck. I'm fucking, I'm looking in the trucks. I'm playing with a hose, squirt and

I'm knocking a door in the back and I open it as like fucking 10 firemen. I go, yeah, I lost an iPad. You're the guy! I'm like, yeah. And I go, who, which one of his found he? I wanted to thank the guy. And he goes, that guy's not here.

And we don't know the story. We don't know where he found it. You know? And when I got it back, I was just happy to get it back. I forgot. I go, wait a minute. you said to me, and I was kidding, you go to me, is it all scratched up and shit?

And I go, oh, it's a mess. Remember? I said it sarcastically. But then I looked down and it is a mess. This corner is dented. This one's dented and there's a few scrapes in the back. But to fall off a car, it's actually pretty good shape. And God bless the fireman because, again, if this fell in the hands of, let's say the Waffle House chef.

You know where I'm going? they would have said you know they would have won yeah that's nice anyways they kept it plugged charged because they knew this guy that's a nice iPad he must have a job you must have a brain so he'll be looking for them so they kept it charged in case they came looking and I did and I thank you fire department of this area I want to give it I don't you know it's dangerous enough in this parking

sometimes we pull in here me in Dallas in the morning it looks like a fucking ABA All-Star, I got a lot of afros and a lot of people of color. And I got nothing wrong with that, but I'm telling you, they don't have suits and ties on them. Yeah, most of them are foreigners, though. Near the do you, Nick. No, I know. There's a lot of that kind of just got here four minutes ago. Where's my check?

Look. And they pet parking our park. Anyways, welcome to the live lineup where it's free shows all day. If you want to watch ad-free, join Rumble Premium. Don't forget to follow my channel and download. the Rumble app. And bang that subscribe button. Crush it.

Hit it with your dick. That's all everybody wants in this country. I do it for Stacey R.P.G. And I request songs that she ignores. She's 30. I'm 64. Bread. Actually, she did bread. That's why I like her.

The people who are her fans that are requesting listen to this one, they have actually great taste. It's shit that you and I like and ranges from like Ray Charles to friggin' Zeppelin and anything in between, you know. And she's just so goddamn cute.

Okay. Anyways, what did I do since yesterday? Nothing. I'm waiting to get my my thyroid was a little slow a few months ago and I had a blood test and the guy put me on this leave a little. thyroxin. It's a very popular drug for hypogonadism. Is it gonadism? Did I just make that up?

Isn't it something like that? I think it is. You get hypo and hyper. Hyper is when you're running too fast and hypo is when you're a little slow with your thyroid. And the thyroid, I was reading them. So I couldn't wait to get, I went yesterday to get blood, thinking, okay, they're going to look at the blood and compare it to a couple months ago and he put me on this shit. That's all I've been waiting for for a month. Those results. So I open my iPhone.

I'm still in bed and I see medical charts comes up and I pull it up and takes me 13 minutes to log in because they treat you like the fucking you're the president. Here's a code. Jesus fucking suck my ass. So I go there and it's not of course.

It's hepatic test for my liver. which doesn't surprise me. They were a little elevated last time because in my older days, I'm enjoying a libation. I used to put three to four drinks a week or whatever. Now I'm honest, I put 11, 12. What can I say, folks?

When you get old, you're like, I don't give a fuck. It's 1 o'clock. I go to 9 a.m. somewhere. Anyways, yeah, so everything's normal in the fucking liver. And I go, okay, but that's not what I wanted to fucking know. And I'm going through the goddamn thing. Can't find it. What I want to know about, and you guys probably know this,

you guys who are, you know, take care of your health. T4, it's a hormone in your blood. And it's supposed to convert into T3, which provides energy to your cells. Your body's supposed to convert it. But as you get older, it doesn't convert, and your T4 just lies there dormant. And that's why, you know, my metabolism was slow.

It affects, your thyroid affects everything. I was in bed reading all the shit about the thyroid. And again, I stumbled over this woman who was a journalist and she had to do a pay. And then they give you a story. And I go, this is a story. I know where it's headed, but it's so good. I mean, she's not lying. I'm Googling about your thyroid affects everything.

And as you know, you won't argue with this. This country and big, big farmer loves to sell us pills for everything. everything, whether it's high cholesterol, name 10 fuck, all that shit. You know, you have brain fog. Anyways, the thyroid controls all that, all of it. In other words, if your thyroid's right and right, you wouldn't have high cholesterol and a bunch of other things that we get medication for. It was a very, very good article.

And you're, like I said, your teeth, so I just wanted to know what my teeth for, count. was. Because that's, again, the T3 is the important one, but your body's supposed to convert it to T3. So that's all I was waiting for. And I opened it up to about my liver, but the liver and the thyroid actually have a lot to do

with each other, too. I'm not going to get into those details, but I learned a shit load so I can get on the phone my doctor and go, no, no, no, no. I read this thing in National Inquirer. Remember a $6 million man? He wrote this So anyways, I didn't get that.

So I left the message with Cheniqua, who answers the phone. She goes, I'm going to write, I'm going to put a letter in there right now. And she's typing Dallas. I'm not fucking kidding you. Remember what's the movie? Meet the parents when Ben Stiller's at the fucking airport counter and the woman's typing. It was like that. I could hear the typing.

And I'm holding the phone out here. There's no music. It's just her banging away. I go, she's fucking, what is she writing the Magna Carner? I can put it back. It had to be five minutes? She didn't say, I'll be with you in a second. What?

Then she goes, I put it in there about your shoulder. What? No. So anyways, I want to know what love is. You hear that? That's Lou Graham. Holy shit, I remember the singer's name. Ford was a great man.

So I want to know that. Of course, they have a thing out now that converts T4 to T3. It's got all the things in it that your body, you know, artichokes are very, who knows, right? But they list shit that, you know, artichoke leaves and all kinds of shit. Then they had a BLT sandwich in there in the ingredient. I go, no, that can't. I can't be right

So anyways I want to pick that I'll tell you why I think it's working Not to get too gross But I'm much more regular since I started taking these pills Sometimes twice a day I'm bragging now I come out of the bathroom My wife I'm like when did you go last bitch

And there's a feather here Yes I do I get on the scale after I unload Long as it says 180 I'm 190 on the nose Again down from 229 a couple years ago, three years ago. But last few days it's been 189, which is like, yeah.

In the 180s? Come on, it was high school. Anyhow, enough about me and my fucking huge cock. What? What'd you say? A what? It's a tiger shark. A what? Still making fun of fags in that scene. Oh, that guy was being sarcastic

because in the movie that's George we're talking about. He was actually a prick earlier. So I think he was being a wise guy. He was making fun of Hooper. Oh, what? Anyways, that's about it. As far as bullshit, socks won last night, again, in Sacramento.

Anyways, you've had enough of that. I guess I should cut the bullshit and get to the unimportant stuff of the day. I know we're strifing, a strafing, I should say, once again. I got a Dallas, you were over there. How big is fucking Iran's... I mean, I guess they're... This is how we know Russia or China

is sending them shit, obviously, because we're blowing shit up for the last... Every night, for the last month. And there's still more places, and the clips are starting to look the same. I see a truck, and they start ammunition. It's starting to look the same. You never know, folks.

And you should be cynical when it comes to your government. You never know. But Trump has been telling us forever. They want to make a deal. And I don't blame some of the people. I can't believe I'm saying this. But some of the people are going, what the fuck? Dude, do you either finish it?

You said you were going to step on them. Anyways, they try to hurt some of our soldiers, you know, over there with our allies in Jordan and wherever. They try to fucking kill a few American soldiers. So Trump said, you're going to pay for that. And did you hear his quote, though? He goes, somebody asked him in the press. He goes, we're going to. bomb the fucking shit out of them.

And that's why. See, when people go, that's not president. No, that is presidential. Maybe not your kind. Huh? You got the word chief in your title. What do you want to say? We're going to fucking send up

smoke signals? We're going to bomb the fucking shit out of them. Funny you mentioning that because the headline for the post. Hammer of the gods. New secret weapon upgrades. U.S. Army

power to blast enemy missile attacks. We're blocking their attacks with it? Yeah? What's it called? The Hammer of God? Hammer of the Gods. That was my nickname, and I was banging chicks in high school. Did I say high school? I meant when I was 34. Hammer of the gods.

They're like, ball peen hammer. What are you talking about? Anyhow, any who? So, yeah. So, yeah, there was more pictures of us. I just didn't know. Trump made it sound like when we blew up there, remember the way there, the mountain with all the fucking uranium and shit?

I thought they were on their last legs then. But Jesus Christ, every night we've been hitting shit. And you know Netanyahu's right in Iraq going, here's where the, they have it all. They have it all. They, remember, these are the people that have been killing Jews forever. They, there's nobody better at finding the, remember they killed the fucking, they killed the, this might have been us, though.

but it was probably from Netanyahu's information. Remember we went to the guy in a building? They had the exact office where there was like 12 guys meeting. It didn't even fucking hurt the other floor. It knocked on the door. Hey, Muhammad, sure enough, the door opens. That's a smart bomb.

It's fucking wicked good, as we say in Boston. Anyhow. Let's talk about, Mr. Fauci, I'll be talking about that and a kid who made a gun out of a sandwich, which we did a few years ago. There's another incident like that, weaponizing bologna, apparently.

But the big story was jerk off Fauci, taking the fifth over 111 times on the stand yesterday. I'll never understand the concept of the fifth and I'm sure it's deeper than, you know, we understand

it as. But it's in there. to protect you, but when you do that, he had a choice, by the way. This is a little different. I know this much. He had a choice because Biden already fucking pardoned him. So he could come here and tell the truth, right? And nothing would happen to him because he's already protected by the pardon. Or he's so scared of telling the truth and how evil is he could take the fifth.

You know, he could take the fifth and now he could still go to jail. So that's how bad what he's hiding is, that he'd rather take the chance to get thrown in jail. And again, I got to say, man, if this guy doesn't go to jail, because the whole world's watching this one. Even people that don't follow politics. This affected their kids and businesses and shit. And something like, if this guy doesn't eventually end up in the slammer, I'll tell you people again, start shoplifting, don't pay your taxes. fucking steel imported cheeses, golf clubs, all that shit.

Because apparently only us small folks held accountable. This guy is like the Italian Hitler. Well, Sean's like Mussolini, but Mussolini had more balls than this fuck. This guy was a narcissist. Anthony Fauci, the former head of the NIH. Anyways, allergy and infectious douchebags. Stunted Republican senators on Wednesday when he refused to answer their.

questions about COVID-19 pandemic by invoking his Fifth Amendment right at the start of the congressional hearing. He ended up invoking that right 100, count them, and 11 times. Isn't that hilarious? And they make you say it every time. That's the punishment. It's like water torch. You should just be able to go like this for the thing. It says fuck off. Now here's part of his opening statement, and you know him and Rand Paul have a hate for each other, which is natural. Rand Paul's trying to do the right thing, and Rand Paul's a doctor.

It makes me even more sick what this jerk off did. And this guy hates Rand Paul because he even said, well, here you go, listen to it. However, given Senator Paul's obvious obsession with calling for my prosecution, his repeated slanderous comments about me, and recently his publicly releasing my unredacted personal diary aimed at embarrassing and intimidating me.

The only conclusion I can reach is that the sole reason he is calling me before this committee is to get me to say something. Get the number for you. Anything that could vindicate his repeated public. Anyhow, one of the most fiery. and interesting exchanges came when Ohio Rep. Senate to Bernie Moreno went after Fauci about a story he

read in the paper about a mom and her family who went to like a high school football game. They weren't wearing masks. And they weren't even sitting here the rest of the people. This is before we knew any. And they were arrested. This guy wasn't even a politician at this point. Successful businessman

who obviously followed politics because when you have successful businesses, you have to know what's going on. He read that and got so fucking crazy that he became, he ran for Congress. That's why he got into politics. And the way they were treated angered this guy so much. He sold multiple businesses and here he is letting Fauci know how that made him feel. When that story broke, I said to myself, I cannot stand Ely on the side. and watch this happen. Here I am sitting in front of you six years later

saying, who the fuck do you think you were for doing that? It is a total disgrace what you did to this country. Why do they bleep shit on the internet? Fucking insane. They didn't on some of them. I don't know, I stumbled over a bunch of them, but they let them say, fuck, it was great. It was fucking great.

Then Josh Hawley, who's always a pit bull, went after Fauci for soliciting his own, you know, his own staff, medical staff. So Fauci himself could be awarded cash prizes, you know, science awards and shit for his own, just for his own narcissism. And he's an egotistical fucking psycho. But of course, Josh Hawley has to, you know, go at him the way he does. You got rich while people were dying, hundreds of thousands of Americans over a million in the end. and you were getting rich, and not only were you doing that, you were using federal employees

with taxpayer money to apply for and solicit cash prizes for you personally. You turned your staff into a full-time application machine. You actually wrote to people and said, do you think maybe I'd qualify? And you got cash for all of this. From taxpayers, U.S. taxpayer money. boy was he exposed and as you're watching this you go oh that's why he's taking the

yeah but now you know like I said he could have just come out and be honest and been cleared of any jail time but now he's you know again again he's probably thinking like we do it they're not going to put me in jail and either that he was like I've been married

to this bra for 50 years you don't think I want to go to jail you watch good fellas remember remember Henry explaining to Karen Steve's in jail because he wanted to go. He wanted to get away from his wife. The only people to go jail and lazy and stick up, man. Anyways, and also Senator Jody Ernst, she's been around a long time. Republican Iowa asked Fauci about using human body parts.

Did you hear what I just said? Using human body parts from aborted fetuses in a gruesome way. for COVID research. I didn't even, I don't even remember hearing about this, do you? When it was all going on? Joni Ernst is turning into a Tom Broca, into a librarian.

But go ahead, Jody. She does good work. NIH-funded coronavirus researcher, Dr. Ralph Barrick and his colleagues at UNC put parts of livers, thymuses, and chunks of human fetal lung that they got from aborted almost five month old human babies. They put those parts in their research mice.

They disgustingly named them BLTL mice and wrote they had created a quote, sandwich of aborted body parts in the mice. Get it folks, a BLT sandwich. Dr. Fauci. Yes or no? Do you think, that human abortive parts should be put into mice for coronavirus research.

The advice of counsel, I respectfully decline to answer based upon my rights under the Fifth Amendment to the Constitution. I wish they'd go. So that's a yes. You know what I mean? They usually do that. I guess. I don't know why they didn't, yes, but they usually go. So I'll take that as a yeah. Who's the big brother back there? I wonder whose side he's on? I'm guessing security. Who the fuck, though? You can be a senator from South Carolina. And then you get the white guy over there who looks like a drunk over the other shoulder. Senator Ashley Moody, who I didn't know about, there's a lot of good ones in Florida.

Congresspeople that we don't know. Also drew attention to passages from Fauci's newly released NIAD diaries, which he acknowledged were authentic in his opening statement that showed the public health official knew he had pushed for lockdowns. in the diaries he admits to push him for lockdowns but in the public when it was going on he said I had nothing to do the lockdowns do you understand this guy

I wish he was in his 50s so if he did go away it would be cool but you know whatever and if he does go are they going to send him to one of those cushy you know I mean they should extradite him

they should use it in the negotiations with Iran go we'll give you this guy if you give us a terrorist that blew up the barracks and here's Miss Modi taking them apart. So Dr. Fauci, how do you square telling the American people publicly

that you didn't recommend locking anything down with your own diary entry, kept on federal government equipment, saying that your recommendation is what convinced the mayor and the president to lock things down? On the advice of counsel, I respectfully declined to- He did that 111-11-d-com.

I rights under the 15-man. to the Constitution. Look at him. What a smug ass. Anyways, I hope he doesn't come to my show on November 5th at the punchline in Atlanta. And November 6th at the Rivers Casino in Philly. November 7th sold Jolz in Potsetown, Pennsylvania. Go to Nick Dip.com to get your tickets now

before they're sold on. And while you're there, jump over to the merchandise page and you can get all kinds of bedpans. Look, we have pelvic bones. that we put my logo on. I don't even know. Is that a toupee? It is a toupee next to the fucking bedpan.

That's all they found when, I can't think of anybody. Anyways, hats, hoodies, t-shirts. It's all, and it's all nice stuff, quality stuff. Also, you want to send a personalized video to someone? I'll say what you're thinking, so you don't have to. Book that at shoutout.us. Apparently, nobody's paying attention to that.

excuse me let's move on to weaponizing sandwiches what you heard me an autistic first oh my god he's autistic autistic on top of it

oh yeah and by the way vaccines had nothing to do with autism what do you shit me it used to be one I'm just making up the numbers but I'm pretty close it was one in fucking 400

would have autism now it's like one out of seven it's fucking insane I'm on the spectrum What? An autistic first grader was suspended from school. He's autistic, number one. Well, when they get older, they can be dangerous.

When the dad has a gun, you know, suspended from school after biting his sandwich into the shape of a gun. First of all, you should give him an A plus for that. Not suspend him, that's creative. And pointing, listen to us, he pointed the sandwich shaped like a gun at a classmate. And we all know, that could have ended. and fucking fatality, right? Don't we know that? Because they thought his hero sandwich was a gun.

You know, they could have been right, but who knows? Jesus Christ. What gun? He's got a fucking hero sandwich here. Who was that, Bonnie Fife? And he's got a fucking sandwich. How funny was that? That's a casino, by the way.

That's a true story. Got to get shot. Can you imagine? Because somebody wrapped it in ten full. If that's in a brown bag, he's alive. I'll tell you, that's why I always use Sarenrap. What? Shut up.

John Medina, six years old, that's the kid who they suspended. Look at him, what a terror. Was suspended for the incident at Sarah Harp, Minter Elementary in Georgia in March. And what his mother claims is part of a pattern of school officials disciplining her son without adequately considering his disability, leaving him feeling like a bad kid. You know, like a... Matt Damie. Matt Damien.

Since 2003, John has been disciplined at least 33 times, including 14 suspensions. You hear that? He's autistic. Discipline. And again, I know you're going to go,

Nick, you're crazy. I want to know the color of the principles and the... It is Georgia, so... Disciplined at 33 times, 14 suspensions. For incidents like kick in punching a student at recess,

which I used to do. I wasn't on the spectrum. I was pissed off because my mother sent me to school in a dress. The other kids had jeans on. Punching at recess, whatever the fuck. Acting like a kid. By the way, it's at recess. You know?

And you're that little, you should get scalded or whatever. But John was previously suspended for lighten a little girl in a wheelchair on fire. That one, they should have let's lie. John was previously suspended for pointing a bottle of water. Oh, Jesus. At someone and making gun noises. And I guess the noises didn't sound like a real gun, so they suspended them.

And also punished for drawing a pilgrim shooting at a turkey. Can I make that up? It is interesting, though. He likes his guns. But again, I'll wait until he has hair on his pencil before I get nervous. I drew it one of those hand turkey things. I put a dick in its mouth. I did.

Did you get in trouble? No, because I was a senior in high school. That's how I get into you, Maine. They said he shows a creative side. I think he feels like he's a bad kid, she told A and F. There were definitely times when he would come home and say, I'm a bad kid. Really?

I never admitted to it. My parents pointed it out. My dad did with this type of movement. Always the backhand until I got big. And that's really hard to hear as a mom. Medina wants school officials to follow John's individualized education program or IEP. I thought that's something women used not to get pregnant, which included accommodations, like taking him for a walk when he's overstimulated.

I went for a walk when I was overstimulated. Holy shit. Three girls ran for me at the bus stop. The true story, everybody. The family hired Donna Reynolds, sister of former dancer at W. A former special education, does she not look like an education director, in another Georgia district to represent them when meeting with the Fayette County Schools? How big is Georgia and how many counties in? It's a big state, ain't it?

Good Lord. When there's a hurricane warning, I'm learning about counties I never heard. But you know what my favorite one is in Georgia? This is the name of it, Effingham County. Should I have not been born there? Effingham. My father would say every Easterer, my mother burnt it. Eppingham.

Not bad, I know. I'm a natural. When you're dealing with six-year-olds in general, I don't think they have the capacity to understand the consequences of their actions, especially when they sound like... There's a reason why we don't prosecute six-year-olds, right? The mom said, no, I mean, the lady said that they hired.

Reynolds said John is not the real problem in this situation. Rather, he's a symptom of the bigger problem. She's exactly right. It's a woman that gets it. I misjudge her. She looked like Janice from the soprano. thought she'd be a hippie type. She gets it because she's from Georgia.

The other ones don't. Anyways, let's move on to two heads are better than one. The Keystone State, I had to Google it. No. Why would you put that in the article? You think you'd be an original? It's like fucking when you watch them baseball, and the guy says instead of on the mound,

on the bump tonight, it's Jason, it's like, and now the new one, Dallas, I don't know if you picked up on this, the word leverage. that's all they say now in sports. It doesn't matter what sport they're talking about. Even on calling radio shows, sports, leverage is a new one.

They're going to save him for the later innings because you want to bring in your leverage guys that means you're better guys. That's all it means is your better guys, your best pitcher. High leverage guys. That's the new. And Jarks think that makes them sound intelligent. or they received their vocabulary word list at the beginning of the season.

Yeah, it's probably put out there by fucking, they should get it from the Urban Dictionary, their new words every year. That'd be fucking funny. That fucking punk-ass bitch had two doubles last night. The Keystone State is twice as nice after eight. Oh, God. You hear this? I'm reading right from the article.

The Keystone State is twice as not. after a rare two-headed gecko was hatched. Look at that. I don't even care if you're a gecko. That's not comfortable. Oh, my God. Now, you know, damn well, whatever the insurance company is,

they're going to capitalize on this. I'm so sick of that little Australian gecko fucking jerk off. Things have been on the air for 20 years now. And, you know, they're going to double up. I don't know, pun. Excuse me. It was hatched last summer.

The tiny twin-headed crested gecko made its debut on June 29th at Rockstar Geckos, a breeding business based in Northeastern Penn. How do you decide to go into that? I live in America, you can be anything you want. I want to fucking raise geckos. Do you? When do you cut your own throat in front of your kids?

This little one was a surprise. Rockstar geckos posted on Instagram alongside the video of the dual-domed gecko. Multiple heads, also known as Polly Sep. who I dated a Polly Suffley from Brooklyn. Big, you know what. I said that for calling Quinn. Because some girl said that. When I was single and doing comedy at Minneapolis,

I picked her up and she had a, she had a, she was missing her foot. I'm not kidding you. She was missing her left foot. I didn't know. She was cute as hell, whatever the fuck. Anyways, she writes me, this is what I was playing.

I don't know, I can't even remember. It was a one-night or I think. But she emails me, do you remember me? I was the one on crutches and I had the big you know what's. Instead of just saying big tits. Like she's fucking Annie Griffith's mom or something. I said that the call. He's been torturing me with it for fucking 20, 30 years now.

You know what. It's generally caused by malformation of developing embryo due to either genetic or environmental factors like smoking crack. We've only had this happen once before in all our years, hatching babies. unfortunately they don't often live that long but we will do our best the uh reptile dealer continued here the ones from the first time it happened to them oh goodness gracious well baby me so horny me so horny why that sound drop nick i don't know that's what guys think

the first thing any guy that saw they goes i wonder what that'd be like fucking that you know i think they have one vagina. They ordered another one, but got lost. FedEx. Look at that. And I can't believe, like when

they were in third grade, they go, Mommy, Daddy would like to talk to you. Can you kill us? I don't want to do this anymore. Are you kidding me? I don't want to live in a house with just my wife. A couple thousand square feet. She doesn't want to live with me, but let's make

that clear. You know what I'm saying. I'm not a people person. What the fuck? If that was two guys, come back if they were two guys and they were both cokeheads, they'd be biting each other's faces and shit.

Missing noses after a good party. You motherfucker. I was going to fuck her first. Bullshit, I was right there. Anyways, Kristen Simon and Garf, they named the two-headed geckos. They christened them,

Simon and Garfunkel. The geckos have defied the odds by surviving. They move around pretty well, even though it appears they each want to go in their separate direction sometimes. That's what I'm talking about. You got to have some wait time.

Oh my God. In case of polysophelic animals, each animal has its own brain and control of organs and limbs shared in addition. So you can't even take a piss without your brother getting involved. Vital organs are often malformed or strained. I know what that's about.

What? Isn't that fucking funny? Let's move on. Get this, folks. You're in for a treat because it's a Nick DePaula show. I'm doing two stories about the WMBA. WMBA team owner and Bulldogs young girls. That's the headline I wrote.

The woke backlash against WMBA player Sophie Cunningham, who's my favorite athlete on the planet, as you know right now, six foot whatever, blonde, blue-eyed, bigger balls than anybody. out there, she likes getting black dykes angry on court. It's her favorite thing. And they hate her because she's just by looking at her. She's everything they're not.

Blonde hair, blue eye, beautiful, and can shoot the lights up. So, you know, they hate her. And she defends. She's, you know, she's Caitlin Clark's, you know what, protect her. Anyways, Sophie Cunningham has been defending women, you know,

women's in sports. It's morphed into fury against She's been saying no men and women's sports. She's the only one that comes out and has the balls to say it in the WMBA. That's why we love her. Anyways, so teenage girls held up a sign at a game in Seattle on Tuesday where the Seattle Storm had taken on Sophie Cunningham and the Indiana Fever. The sign read,

Thank you, Sophie, for speaking up for girls, and the girls wore shirts from the X, X, X, X, Y, Athletics brand. That's chromosome, folks. that promotes opposition to biological males and women's sports. We were trying to be, these are young kids. These are teenage girls, like young teenage girls. We weren't trying to be political. We're just trying to support Sophie.

We were being super respectful. We were just holding our signs and cheering for both teams. One of the teens said to investigative journalist Brandy Krause, the teens said an older lady confronted them. and I went, the minute the minute I heard that and it mentioned earlier she's a co-owner of the Seattle team

I couldn't get to the, I went right to images because I wanted to know just how manly this woman was. But here's the girls explaining what happened. This lady, older lady, comes up to us and she comes up to us and at first I think she's going to be nice and she asked like

what are you guys doing? Something like and then it was like Jesus loves everyone. That's what she told us and I was like, oh, I know. Like, I'm religious like, I know. I know. I know. Yeah, and she's like, oh, I hope Jesus can forgive you for what sin you've done and like something like that.

And then she told us that we were effing insane and she went like this. Yeah. Yeah. She's like, you have to stop this shit. And stop pulling this. Yeah. And for you guys to come here and pull this. Yeah. She said, for you to come here and pull this shit? Yeah. She said the word? Yeah. Did she say effing insane or

no, she said the word. Yeah. Okay? The woman, all the woman said to them, we'll show you in a second. I hope, you know, God loves everyone. The minute I heard that, I go to Dyke and she's being sarcastic, I hope God saved you, you know, for being so, and you're fucking insane to these little girls. So I couldn't wait to get to the fucking image. And it did not disappoint.

Cruz posted, there she is. There she is. Huh? That guy in list. There she is. Just filled with hate. I am so right about this. I almost should have a doctrine in it. About lesbians in their anger and trans.

Again, it's not about politics, hating people on the right. It's about hating themselves. And how God chose to make them in the image of him and he's a guy. that's where it's coming from. That hatred, they channel it through politics because only idiots like Democrats would take them in. They're hateful people. All this time you guys have been growing up,

you heard about white heterosexual males being the problem. These are the most hateful jerks. They have been their whole fucking lives. I'm glad you are lonely on prom night. You're a horrible person. Maybe you weren't as a kid, but look what you turned into. Belittling two teenage girls

because they're pretty. than you'll ever be, Frank. Cruz posted video on social media of her, I called her Kraus, it's Cruz, I think, of her interview with the girls from outside the Seattle Storm Arena. Cruz also identified the culprit as Storm cone owner, co-owner,

excuse me, Celeste Keaton. That's Celeste. That's Celeste. That guy in a little... One of them was, one of the young girls was left in tears. I tried to get security involved and was told I should email the front office. One of the teens said she was shocked by the co-owner's behavior. That's because she's a young girl and doesn't realize.

This woman has enough money to own a basketball team and she's still a cunt. There's the rest of them right there. And there's, look at this. I can smell them from here. I can smell them. Put some deaths and out on those balls. So also the WGBA suspended and find her. They did?

Beautiful. Why don't they put her to death? would that be too much berating two little girls holding signs up for Sophie Cunningham who should be the role model that's what they should be teaching

young girls be like this not you know you can cut your tits off and add a dick later that's what they're learning fuck I hate dykes except for the pretty ones who eat each other that's fine but the ones that look like truck drives and fucking look like they're on the pro bowling

tournaments WMBA ratings Second WMBA Story Rating difference Stark without Clark Try to make it a rhyme for you But it sucks

ESPN had plenty to celebrate After WMBA All-Star weekend Saturday nights WMBA All-Star game Average 3.2 million viewers Are you shitting me? And again I thank you But really?

Even this caught on? And I know it's Caitlin Clark and all that shit But really, guys, because it can't be all women watching it. There's not that many dikes, is there? 3.2 million viewers on ABC peaked at 3.3 million and became the second most watched edition of the event in league history. The audience increased by 44% from last year when Caitlin Clark attended the game but didn't play because of an injury.

Are you connecting the two? And it was well known last year before the game that she wasn't playing. So people said, I'm not going to watch it. This year, they knew she was playing. That's almost 50%. This year, Clark returned. And she said, what did she say? Oh, God, I don't know.

She had nothing, apparently, according to my... I have things to say. Thank you. I don't have that. Why did I put that in? Oh, I put that in. I put those in while I'm doing the article, and I still haven't transferred all the fucking...

Let me hit one that makes no sense. Anyways, she put on a shooting class. clinic from da. Let me tell you something. They came out to see her. And I don't want to, because there are black people who appreciate her, like Jason Whitlock, you know, and who appreciate her. And you know who does NBA black dudes, most of them. Of course, you got that guy Clark who was fired by SPN, who's just a racist piece of garbage anyways, but you got, you got like Shaq and these guys, magic saying this girl is, you know, she is the league and they should be treating her better.

Excuse me. Watch her. And these shots are from what we call downtown, folks. This is the All-Star game. Clark pulling. And hitting on a deep three. What's this? Players going up against each other.

Right here, isn't it? Look at this bomb. Clark again. Nothing about cotton. On a bomb, she's hit a couple of them already. Here's Clark. Will she try again? You bet.

Larry fucking Bird. Within the first three minutes of this game. Oh, now there's a brother who's a fever shirt on. So I don't want to be, you know, they look, they appreciate Larry Bird. And that's who she is, man. Big gal. Her and Sophie, they should have a sitcom. After they're down with their craze, like Laverne and Shirley.

Sophie and Clarkie. I don't know if fucking Katie. Sophie and Katie. You know, they work at a bare place in Milwaukee. People under 90 are going, what's he talking about? Even just a podcast would do well. Oh, that's, they're already doing it. I know Sophie's got one already.

One night earlier, however, she wasn't, listen to this. The night before the All-Star game, Caitlin was not part of the WMBA three-point contest after declining an invitation, and she wasn't among the participants in the WMBA's new shooting stars event. This is all the shit the day before, they put on. That audience, predictably, went in the opposite direction.

What? I should have went to All Star Weeker. Did you hear that? Well, baby. Me so horny. Me so horny. Oh, no. Stop. Stop. You just discovered something. Yeah, I know.

Mouple sound. I'll spend half the morning trying to. mix and match. I'm black, y'all. Make me a sandwich. The audience predictably went the opposite direction. After Outkick and Fox News Digital asked ESPN for the numbers.

So Outkick and Fox News Digital asked for the ratings for the night before. And guess what? ESPN, the network? Oh, they did give them, I'm sorry. A network, they had to badger them, I think. A network spokesperson said Friday's telecast was 1.1.

7 million viewers on ESPN and peaked at 1.35. The average declined approximately 11% from 1.31 million who watched last year's competent. All just did is confirm what everybody knows. The WNBA goes as she goes. And yet they try to knock her teeth out every chance they get out of hate and envy. ESPN publicly celebrated Saturday's strong audience. It also promoted the 1.8 million viewers who watched WMBA countdown.

Oh, my God. You've got to be kidding. Which featured a sit-down. Oh, with Clark. Okay? Almost 2 million people who watched a sit-down with her. But its ratings graphic did not,

listen, they put a graphic in, was it USA? They're the ones that always have pie charts and shit. They had a graphic on the newspaper, ESPN, on the ratings. It did not include Friday's average or peak audience. And ESPN did not explain why. They don't have to.

We know that you'll just lie and they never let go with the bias. Do you guys ever give it a fucking rest? Just once. What would you have to lose by going, you know what? She is. She's a magnet. That would hurt the black lesbians' feelings. Because, see, we see the world as oppressed and oppressor.

And as long as she's white, go ahead. Also, they probably don't want to compare it to the NFL's average viewership of 18.7 million. Nobody wants to compete. You shit me. How about college football when they play a meaningless spring game, inter-squad? Do you know what that is? That's Alabama breaking up into, you know, playing each other. We did it up at Maine.

I think we drew 400 people. These fuckers will get 80,000 for a inter-squard. I'm just putting the point of this is WMBA and they treat her like, shit, I am so surprised. I think eventually next time she gets hit in the mouth, she's going to go, I'm going to Europe. I'm going to Europe and making 14 times the fucking money and be a star over there too.

Where the mullinians act a little nicer. I'm a mullinian so I can say that. No, I'm not. What am I saying? Well, I'm an eggplant. I'm an Italian. Well, you watched. You heard the movie.

True romance. You're an eggplant. That's a fucking guy. Christopher walking. He goes, you're a cantaloupe. All right. Next headline. Wisconsin leftist jerk off bar owner loses alcohol permit.

We've reported on this guy before. A progressive owner of a Wisconsin brewery says he will fight tooth and nail after his alcohol permit was revoked. Kirk Bangstad says the state's, Kurt Bangdad says the state's Department of Revenue is revoking the permit for monocry. brewing company. Sounds like a mouthwash. To operate, it's too low, they're taking the permits away from two locations. Excuse me.

They'll have to pry, listen to this. God, is this guy a blowjob hack? This is the owner. They'll have to pry me out of my tap room before I stop selling beer to thirsty progressives who come to visit us. So if I came in, a thirsty conservative, you wouldn't take my bit.

Is that how that works? That's good. That's some open mind. this, you fucking bagget. Vanstads Brewery has made headlines for its anti-Trump post that included a promotion offering free beer whenever President Trump dies.

Can imagine we did that about Obama? You think the FBI would not have closed the place up? I mean, a guy got fired for wearing a fucking Obama mask, a rodeo clown guy. Did remember that one? After Saturday's shooting at the White House Correspondents dinner in Washington, this is when he did this.

After the shooting at the Brewer owner, Kurt Banks, had posted, this is after the fucking attempt of Trump's life at the dinner. Either a brother or sister and the resistance

needs to work on their marksmanship or he faked another assassination to get a positive news cycle. And he really believes that. That's how retarded. This is what you're dealing with. They're blinded by their hatred. Why can't we just

fucking have a war? Because we're going to crush them. You know that. I'll watch. it on TV, like I said. I already get a bunker. I'm digging. It's not at my house. You guys have no idea where it is. Well I'll tell you. You know the B&D downtown? No. As you can imagine, I'm not taking this lying down. Oh, he's talking like everybody knows him. The business owner wrote in a substack post on Sunday. We're going to fight the state of Wisconsin,

tooth and nail. You already said that faggot. Back in April of this year, the FBI stopped by and asked him a few questions. This was April of last year. Want to kidnap, inflict bodily harm to the president or vice president, or have made threats to do that? I can answer that myself. No, I do not. He's lying. He's saying, they asked him, you want to do bodily harm to the president or kill him in. I do not. Do words mean anything? But you hope somebody else does. I'm sure it went deeper than that, the interview, right? He went on to ask for donations to the brewery's legal defense fund.

I'm going to put a nice number two in a FedEx package. As usual, fighting to keep my business alive means I have to pay lawyers, and that's never cheapy at it. Every time this happens, I rack up $100,000 in legal bills before you can even see a judge. If you can help chip in to the Managua Company's legal defense fund, I'd really appreciate it. Suck a dick and die.

Fuck you and your family and everything you like. and hold dear to your little fucking black heart. Finally tonight and funny for the week, so much for second chances. Taquan Johnson, and that's where I stopped reading. I saw second chances in the headline, Tequan Johnson, and I go, this ain't going to end good. Now, people would say you're bigot for saying that.

Why am I right all the time? I put it together after one word in the headline and two words, the name of the, guy. I shouldn't be able to do that, but it's very easy. Most people can. DeKron Johnson stopped breathing when he was born prematurely in 2007, and then his dad took his boot off the kid's neck. As black butter would do him. Pregnaturely in 2007 was dead for 65 minutes. Is that black time? They're using a, you know what I mean? Was it really? Before a physician prayer miraculously led to the babies regaining a heartbeat,

according to the Catholic Church. They've never lied. 19 years later, police are searching for Johnson under an arrest warrant listing, felony assault with a firearm, and firing in a compact area. This is what he did with the second chance. Here's him talking before he became a gangster.

If God didn't want me in this world, he would have just let me die on the table. That's what we were all praying for. but he wanted to give me a second chance. And look what I did with it. I catapulted into a, you know, a criminal career. The revival of Johnson as a baby was considered a miracle. By who?

Ray Lewis? Because the attending physician had invoked the aid of Father Salvador Valera Parra. Oh my God. Yeah, he never porked the kid, did he? Nice fucking hat. Is that the smaller version of the current Pope hat? This guy was there when there was, and why is he, first of all, this picture, look like it's from 1840. No, he was invoked in the prayer.

Oh, he was invoked. Good point, tell us. I'm like, look at fucking pictures from 1840 and this guy was still there a couple of years ago. Duh. The Catholic, anyways, they invoked him. But can I just tell a quick story, folks? Because I have a story about everything. When you get this old, you have a story about everything.

My mom's mother, my grandmother, Lucille Cudmore, when she was like 10 years old, started developing all these sores on her neck and stuff, stopped eating, started trivling. They put her in the hospital for, I don't know, like a month. And then they came to my grandfather who got killed in a car accident and said, take her back home. She's going to die. She hasn't eaten. And they thought it was cancer.

So they take her back home. The mother, my grandmother's mother, my great-grandmother, I guess, who was very religious and from Quebec, I guess, took her all the way to Quebec, took a train all the way to Quebec and went to this church that she went when she was a kid. And the priest gave her a prayer for my mother to say, and for my great grandma to say every day, two nights later the next night after they brought home

she started eating and then within weeks she was at the table and things started healing and shit and my grandmother lived till she was 93 she had us and you know she had all the scars

we used to look at her neck and I'm just saying if some people believe they believe I would have taken that train I would have got all the way up there right and they would have went

no he's not Mothaca. He's got in right now. He's saving another kid in India. Take your ass back to fucking Massachusetts. But that's a true story. So my grandmother would say that every night until she died.

And my mom says it too, by the way. I won't say it. I don't speak French. The Catholic Church investigated the incident for years before Pope Leo the 14th. I don't understand how names work for Does that mean it's the 14th Pope named Leo? Can you pick some more names?

Go with Darrell. How about Tyquan? Anyways, before Pope Leo the 14th officially recognized it as a miracle. A lot of people said it was just a card trick. What? That's what Father Guido Tuduci said. That guy, S&L. He was talking about they made somebody a saint, Mother Teresa.

In order to be a saint, you've got to do a tree of miracle. I think she had done it one and two was a card trick. Never forgot that. I was like 14 when he said. Johnson is being sought over a double shooting in Newport. There you go. That's what he did with the second chance. Excuse me. Newport Road Island, which is a beautiful place on July 19th, along with another man who's being sought for questioning.

Police said they found two victims ages 22 and 25 who had been shot. They were transported to a hospital for treatment of gunshot injuries that were not life-threatening. Detective said they believed the shooting was targeted. Johnson and the other man sought are believed to be armed and dangerous according to police of Facebook. So so much for the Pope and his predictions. Black y'all and I'm black y'all and I'm blacker than black and I'm black y'all. And then the, uh, when the Pope brought him back to life, they heard this.

And that's catchy to him. I'm learning the new thing. You notice? Makes for a good show. That's it, folks. thank you for being with us all week, I'm assuming. Or you watch this show, I guess. That's the whole idea of a podcast.

You listen to it when you have a chance or watch it when you have a chance. But the numbers are up, actually. The numbers are up. Again, they threw me in the big screen, killer numbers. And then they put me back in the kids' room, so I don't know. Anyways, it's been my life story. Fuck everybody. How about that?

Except few people who tune in. Anyways, Camio.com. Apparently nobody wants to do it. I don't give a fuck if you do it or not. How about that? If you want me to, you know, roast one of your friends or relatives,

go to Camio.com and for $11 bucks and a tuna sandwich, I'll blow you behind a dumpster. That's it. You guys think that I'll say it. You're very welcome.

I hope you have a great weekend with your friends and family. We'll see you on Monday. Hi. Good night, everybody.