The Nick DiPaolo Show - FB Allows Physical Threats | Nick Di Paolo Show #677

Episode Date: March 15, 2022

Putin threatens western companies. Biden flashback. FB chooses who dies. Black on yellow hate. Battle in Seattle. 14 year old's kill list. Tom the terrible.

I am so sick and tired of the liberal agenda that is destroying our country from our schools to our workplaces to our media. It's literally everywhere. Well, everywhere maybe, but not this show. Never. Here you get the truth, unfiltered and unapologetic. I don't care if I hurt feelings or if I take a position that isn't agreeable or if I step on somebody's toes, I call them the way I see them and I put it out there for free. To keep this show free, I need your help. Please go to nickdip.com and make a contribution or even better, subscribe at thecomicsgym.com or on Patreon today and get an extra encore show each day. Discounts on merchandise and a whole lot more. Thank you guys so much for watching, sharing, and contributing

to the best show, in my opinion, on the internet and the most honest. You guys make it happen. guitar solo Welcome. Welcome to the show. Put universal remote back in docking station. Yeah, but you people still wiping your ass with bare hands. Hi, folks. Hawaii in a Sopranos kind of mood, but what's new? What is it, Tuesday? It's a Tuesday.

Told Dallas I made fish tacos over the weekend. Oh, my God. Right out of a Bobby Flay book. Holy fucking moly. Did I mention that yesterday already? Okay, you know what? What the fuck is going on? You're 60.

Jesus, 60. I'm about 78 mentally. Spent 20 minutes looking for my cup of coffee today after I put it down. Jesus H. Christ. I'm starting to get worried. I did suffer, first of all, a real concussion when I was 11. I got hit by a car. I was in a hospital for a week,

so that was a serious one. And then four more between high school and college. And I'm not saying CTE, but my dad had Alzheimer's and that, and I smoked a ton of weed, man. I just loved it. No, I didn't. I fucking hate that shit. You got any friends, Dallas, that smoked weed their whole life and now they can't even form a sentence? I know people.

I would call them friends. But are they like brain dead? No fucking doubt about it. I got a couple friends from high school. Anyways, you know what? They still had a better time than I did. I'm sure they're in a diaper right now. What the fuck else did I want to talk about? Is it gross that I worked out two days in a row and haven't showered? This is what happens when you're

married, folks. Well, I can't smell you, so you're fine. I don't smell even when I, because I'm a clean person. But I just, you know, when you're younger, you're like, hey, maybe somebody will blow me at the bus stop. I better shower. But now you're like, hey, I'm out the fuck. It's a lot of work. Plus the bathroom. I have an upstairs bathroom two feet from our bedroom.

But that one's been out of commission for two years because of some pipe work and the shit we did in the kitchen. We had to get the kitchen done first. So I've been peeing into, you know those plastic bottles they give old people in hospitals? I've been peeing in one of those

upstairs. It's a true story. And pretty gross, huh, folks? Between that and not showering, I'm pretty gross. But again, nothing. Every girl I ever had said they liked me because I was clean of the average. I swear to God. It's like my mother.

I was a little bit of a clean freak. Well, sure, I'd get shit under my fingernails, but I'd leave it there for a few weeks. Nobody would see it. But what am I doing? What happened to the show? I'm talking about this. There's a war going on. Let's get right to the lead story. Well, I thought it was the lead story. Again, folks, I just touch on these, and I love it because you know what? There's people on TV doing the same thing as me. Not news channels. They have to cover it. But a lot of them,

these pundits are going, you know what? This shit's probably false. We don't know what to believe. My wife sent me a video that I should have put on the show today. It's 14 minutes long, though. This girl, she's famous on the, on, on internet. She's always, she's a right wing. And, um, do you realize some of the footage they show is from literally, literally from video games? Some of the footage. Another footage of a missile hitting a building was eight years old. The woman confronting the guy in the park, that was a couple years old.

There's about five other things. It was only reinforcing my point that you don't know what to trust, so don't do that much of it, but here's something we can. Putin threatens Western companies. I have mixed feelings about this one. Russian prosecutors have issued warnings to Western companies in Russia threatening to arrest corporate leaders there who criticize the government or to seize assets of companies that withdraw from the country according to people familiar with the fucking nutbag. Comrade, here is something that might be of interest to you. McDonald's McNuggets. And the CEO, Robert Iger.

Dragonfly Wolf 10. Colorful names. Here we are. Chicken McNuggets with barbecue. Colorful names. Prosecutors delivered the warnings in the past week to companies, including Coca-Cola. Good. Fuck you. 1.84 percent

ko one put okay McDonald's Gamble international business machines called IBM KFC there's only four black people over there No lines at that plate owner Yum brands, that's Asian food, I think. That's minus 2.44% people. The thing's cut off. The calls, letters, and visits included threats to sue the companies and seize assets, including trademarks, the people said. What did McDonald's have to say?

No, you ain't. And you know what? I get mixed feelings because these are woke companies. Stick it up your ass. It's kind of ironic. They're basically socialist-slash-Marxist themselves.

And now they got a fucking real Marxist pulling their shit down. So they're just going to sit quiet. How does it feel, Coca-Cola? You move the All-Star game for a bullshit reason. Same with you, McDonald's. I haven't seen a white person in your commercials since 1876. I mean 1970s. Procter and Gamble. How long have they been poisoning kids? Anyways, I don't give a fuck. You know what if I said that

like well you say it anyway. I was texting with Gutfeld. You know what? If I said that, like, well, you say it anyway. I was texting with Gutfeld. He's getting a ton of shit for saying that we have to be careful not to get into World War III. You know? But he gets called, you know, by, when you're that high profile on TV, on Fox, excuse me, and I apologize to the guy that left Patreon because I cough all the time. That's a true story. I don't blame him, but go fuck yourself. Anyways, yeah, he's getting all kinds of pushback for being a, now you're an agent,

you know, you're a Putin lover, you're a traitor. Folks, we've never been closer, I'm telling you. The fucking, nevermind that one, we're going to have it over here. So anyways, Putin's putting the hammer down. Russian President Putin last week expressed support for a law to nationalize assets of foreign companies that leave his country over its invasion of Ukraine. So you can have a nationalized McDonald's,

it'll probably run better, wouldn't it? How's that for pro-fucking communism? I mean, imagine you go into a fucking McDonald's in Moscow and all the help is white. That's got to be fucking amazing. The prosecutor's warnings were directed at companies across sectors, including technology, food, apparel, and banking, the people familiar with the matters said.

What exactly leads you to believe the Soviets were involved? I don't know. Mr. Putin was at Burger King swearing at the kids. I don't know. Good. That doesn't really bother me. How about that? I hate those companies so much.

Just for the awokism. Don't get me wrong. I'll fucking eat six filet of fish in a second. And wash it down with Diet Coke because I'm a big girl. President. What a show. You don't see Hannity doing it. Doesn't have to. Guy's worth a trillion dollars. You know, that motherfucker signs a contract for like literally 500 million. He's like Howard Stern almost.

Pitbull. I've been on his show a couple times. He turned white when I made a couple of jokes. Never had me back. I'll tell you my best, my viewers have heard this before. I was on when Obama was president and he just passed a stimulus bill that had all kinds of pork in it. And I come up with this, like, on the way to the show. And I'm like, this is the best fucking joke. He comes to me, and he goes, perfect setup, too. We had no idea. He goes, Nick, why do you think Obama, you know, included so much pork in the spending bill? I go, without missing, maybe he's trying to prove he's not a Muslim.

Do you think Sean would belly laugh? He turned pale. He went right to the next guest. There's 10 people in the world that could think of that joke. Colin Quinn, me, and I don't know the other eight. President, maybe you're telling Lou. President Joe Biden is blaming Russian, this is a flashback to jerk off here,

to prove he was ignorant before he lost his mind. President Biden is blaming Russian. Oh, and by the way, Dean Abadiah, if I ever see you in person, I'm going to punch your face in. I hope this gets out to you. You're a fucking ungrateful, snotty little fucking,

I don't know where you're from, the Middle East or some shit. You're an American-hating piece of shit. You put out a bunch of talking points yesterday, you know, blaming things Republicans have done. And he says, rig election. Are you fucking out of your mind? Get the fuck out of my country. Really.

He used to work at SiriusXM. I'd walk by his window. I used to give him the finger and he used to laugh and then he stopped laughing. I'll choke the life out of you, you cocksucker. Anyway, CNN, by the way, a contributor. Anyway, he's blaming Russian President Vladimir Putin

for everything going wrong with his presidency, from the Ukraine war to high gas prices. But he sang a different tune back in 2012 when he mocked fucking Mick, Mick, Mick, hello, Mickey Mouse, Mitt Romney's Cold War mentality. Yeah, he... What's that? Didn't age well.

No, it didn't. Neither did he. Well, both he, Obama probably told him to say it, or he got it from Obama. Remember during the debates, the 1980s called them in, and they want their foreign policy back. Okay, Marxist dinkweed. Romney criticized then-President Obama and Vice President Biden for a soft approach to Russia, such as pushing a reset button, giving up on missile defense agreements with allies, and offering nuclear concessions in the New START Treaty.

So he was dead on. Where's the video? Did I miss it? Oh, it's come. In March 2012, Obama was infamously caught on hot mic telling then-President Dmitry Medvedev that he would have more flexibility, everybody remembers this one, to compromise on missile defense after he was re-elected, implying he should convey the message to Putin. Fucking Obama. Oh, that dirty cocksucker. And let me tell you something else. That probably wasn't an action

either. He wanted that out there or whatever. You've got to remember, guys, politicians at this level, it's never what it seems, no matter what they do. In a subsequent interview with CNN, Romney said, Russia is without a question our number one geopolitical foe. They fight every cause for the world's worst actors. The idea that Obama has some more flexibility in mind for Russia is very, very troubling indeed. And here's what's dumb. And here's what dumb Joe Biden said back then,

proving again he's been a nitwit since day one. Check this out. So, and the second thing is, Governor Romney's answer I thought was incredibly revealing. He acts like he thinks the Cold War is still on. Russia is still our major adversary. I don't know where he's been. How about in reality, stupid?

You're a loser. You'll always be a loser. That clip aged like Nancy Pelosi's tits or neck skin. Pick. I don't know where he's been. Sounds like he's been to college and did better than you. Nip fucking wit. You want me to believe this guy got 81 million votes last year whatever you can suck my white European ball sack, boy. Anyhow, any he. Your mother is a... Let's move on, shall we? Facebook chooses who dies.

Very well done. Dallas is on his game today. And you know why? He's all excited. Tomorrow's like a... Tomorrow or Thursday? He's all excited about... St. Patrick's Day. The decision... By the way, we're not or Thursday. It's all excited about St. Patrick's Day.

The decision, by the way, we're not on Thursday. Dallas has to, but we, he's going to provide footage of him throwing up at 4 o'clock in the morning, by the way. The decision, that's true, we're going to take that one off. You guys, it's the second biggest,

behind New York, it's the second biggest fucking St. Patrick. You can't even move around here. I don't get it. It's Georgia. I know. I'm not going to read the history. My wife told me.

In one ear, out the other. The decision first reported by Reuters allows people to call for violence against Russians. This is on Facebook, by the way. Look at the guy. There's a, what you call on the left, that's called an alpha male. And there's a beta bitch on the right, waiting for a load to land in his freckled face. What's that? He's a meta bitch now.

That's right. He's a better meta bitch. So anyways, the first decision by Facebook, reported by Reuters, allows people to call for violence against Russians. Since when is it our right to call for violence against Russians. Since when is it all right to call for violence against anybody? I'll tell you when. When it's very important to these. Do you see they're on the same page? China or whatever. This is very telling about Facebook and Zuckerberg and Silicon Valley, the people who partition information. This is very telling. I don't remember ever hearing that. Do you? That it's our right to commit violence against Eddie? Which should make guys like you and me and ladies out there a little scared,

because eventually they'll turn it on us. You got Mitt Romney calling Tulsi Gabbard a traitor last night. And a few other politicians, Adam Kinzinger. Anyways, the platforms are also allowing calls for the deaths of Russian President Vladimir Putin and Belarusian President Alexander Lukashenko. I call him Lukey. The change was made in response to Russia's invasion of Ukraine. Oh, so it's all right. Anything Russia, anything, I swear to God they're doing that for a lot of reasons, but one of them is that fucking hoax we went through for two and a half years,

and this is their way of going. We still think they're the number one problem. Belarus has allowed Russia to stage the invasion from within its borders and provided it with other support. Facebook and Instagram's parent company, Meta. When did that? They changed your name? Jesus, Metaverse.

This is a nerd on steroids is what this is. I laughed so hard, that Metaverse thing. Remember we did a story on it? A girl went in there. She got fucking gang raped like four minutes after she got... There's your metaverse, you dinkweed. Facebook and Instagram's parent company Meta says that the new policy doesn't allow for calls for violence against civilians. Oh, okay.

As a result of the Russian invasion of the UK, we have temporarily made allowances for forms of political expression that would normally violate our rules, like violent speech such as death to Russian invaders. So you can say that now, right? What the? How about? We still won't allow credible calls for violence against Russian civilians. Nobody's calling for... What, are you going to come up by name? Yeah, this guy Vladimir spit at my girlfriend at a party two years ago,

and I want his parents to... Violence against Russian civilians, a meta-spokesman told... So I'm telling you, that's the takeaway from that story. If it's important enough to them them and it shows you their alliance and their attitude. If anybody in this country speaks out, even says, hey, let's slow down. You know, maybe we can bring Russia

to the table. People are getting in trouble for that. It's fucking frightening. Did I include a story about that, about Kelsey Garrett? I did, right? I didn't? Wait a minute. I remember getting Tulsi Gabbard's name wrong. I called her Gabby Tulshard.

I didn't include a story about... Wow. I'm going to go home and take a nap. Again, I was up until fucking 3.05 last night. I don't know why, folks. And I had taken a... nap. Oh, that's why. I took about a three-hour power nap by accident. Fucking, it's unbelievable.

I swear to God, the day I hit six, yeah, I've been psychological. And I shit my pants this morning. Black on yellow hate. I wonder what this could be. This is one of the most disturbing videos. So shy away if you're not, you know, if you're kind of sensitive to this stuff. I saw one on TV last night where a homeless black dude, Yonkers, New York. No, this was Yonkers. This is another one, Tucker Carlson show. I think it was in Seattle or whatever, homeless black dude, pushes a 67-year-old nurse

from behind down a flight of stairs. Cement subway stairs. She rolled, flipped like she was a professional stuntman. It was so gross. She lands on a platform below. He runs down, picks her up, throws her down the second. 67 years old. I don't...

Again, we don't have a violence problem. We have a black violence problem. I'll say it until I'm fucking black in the face. That doesn't mean I think all black people are black. You know what it means. I'm sick of saying that. Everybody fucking knows it. And here's the thing.

Anyways. Calm down. Joe Rogan will say, why is he so mad? Yeah, exactly. Why aren't you? A 67-year-old woman wearing a white face mask and dark hooded jacket and pushing a shopping cart enters an apartment building vestibule in Yonkers, New York as she moves

to unlock the door. A man comes up behind her. Notice, notice, this article's about four paragraphs, not one mention of black or brown. Not one mention. And the guy that threw the lady down the stairs in Seattle, black dude, they gave a description, didn't mention the race.

So now another old lady's going to get pushed out. Do you understand how irresponsible what is this with protecting black people who are you know the ones on the street that are mentally

what is with that? Un-fucking and there's a bunch of white people going ah you can't they're just people shut the fuck up. If you put a bunch of fish in a bowl and one of them was eating all the other fish and there were

four different colors, whatever. But every time there's a white one, they mention it very clearly multiple times. What are you shitting me? If it's a white perp, they have a stool sample 10 seconds after it happened and put up his high school picture. So unlocked, a man comes up behind her, her in the head a big black man you can

tell he's fresh out of the pen and in my opinion he wants to go right back and this is the way because he's too ignorant dumb to make a living in this country and he hits her in the head with a roundhouse fucking right. Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape. She shouldn't have said that. And the music didn't help. The force of the blow knocks the woman to the ground as she lies there. Her attacker bends down, pummels her repeatedly.

Hands for the next 20. Both hands he uses. More than 125 blows altogether. Then he stomps on her seven times and spits on her before walking away. Check this out and it's just, are you fucking kidding? By the way, where are we going to show that? Every place but YouTube, right? Look at, can you fucking imagine? Guy shouldn't be in civilization. Luckily he's out of shape.

You know what I mean? Look, you can see her hand. That means she's not even covering up. How fucking disgusting. Still going. Still punching, folks. For those of you who are listening and not watching, he's still punching with both hands. Okay, he's actually punching himself up.

67-year-old Asian woman. He's still punching, by the way. He's still punching. Now he stands up, kicks her in the face, stomping on, I'm guessing her head it looks like, because this is what you do in a prison fight, stomping on her head. You can see her right arm come out like she's on, he's still stomping. This guy's about 270 pounds it looks like, too. Now he just hawked a Louie on her.

So tell me again, because of slavery, how this is the problem. Unfucking real. Get him off the screen, this scumbag. Fucking. He called her an anti-Asian misogynistic slur, and she ignored him. Moments later, he attacked her, and what officials said was violence driven by anti-Asian bias. Anti-Asian, see, that covers everybody. Couldn't be by black ignorance and hate, and no mention that, I'm going to say 95% of these are black on yellow. I might be being conservative with that number. Yet another incident and a nationwide surge.

Do you see how they avoided? These blacks. Who knows where they're going to take the wrong way. On Monday, the Yonkers Police Department and the Westchester County District Attorney, where I used to live, announced that Tamel Esco, 42 of Yonkers, had been charged with attempted murder and assault, both as a hate crime, as a result of... Really? You need that hate crime in there? Let's say that didn't exist. As a result of the attack, which occurred shortly after 6 p.m. on Friday, Mr. Esco was waiting outside the building when the police arrived on Friday while the victim, bloodied and writhing in pain, lay on the floor. I'm guessing, and again, I'm guessing this guy's been in and out of jail.

I'm guessing. I fucking know. And you know what? He can't make it on the outside. Now, he either came up with this because they're predators. That's all they have to do is see somebody. Or one of his street buddies said, here's how you get back in. The woman whose name was not released sustained broken bones in her face, bleeding on the brain, and numerous cuts and bruises on her head and face, officials said. She was hospitalized in stable condition.

Tough, tough in stable condition. Tough, tough. Stable condition. So that doesn't say much for his punching power because you can kill somebody doing that. You know what I mean? If that was an ex-boxer or a fucking UFC guy that was that size, you'd kill.

He has 14 previous arrests. And I again, I say after five, you have to do seven, whatever. I mean, we don't believe in deterrence at all. I'm telling you, the fucking guys like de Blasio

and Krasner who runs Philly get a hard on when they see this shit. He has 14 previous arrests, half of them on felony charges, according to the Yonkers police, convicted of assault in 2011, sentenced to just over three years in prison, and released on parole after about two and a half years in October 2013. This isn't an accident, folks. This is whoever runs the fucking place letting them out on you,

who they despise you. The people that make those rules, they live behind gates. They have security there. They're called leftist Democrats. October 2030, state prisons record show. So there he is. Just look at him. Don't judge a book by the cover.

Nick, what do you think he does for a living? I don't know. He's a producer for Dancing with the Stars, Iran. Again, black on yellow. I'll say it again, black on yellow. I'll say it again, America doesn't have a crime problem. We have a black crime problem. And no, that doesn't mean every black person, because a lot of, most black people are affected by the black crime problem. Until you stop, and here's where Billy Berg got mad at me for saying black

illegitimacy rates are a cause of a lot of major social ills. And he gave me a lecture about how ignorant I was. And again, I love Billy and whatever the fuck. What does he care? He's got a great career. I'm just saying. I hate his politics.

He hates mine. We do the best to fucking try to hide that. Battle in Seattle. Amazon is temporarily relocating. And again, Amazon is a left-wing company run by Bezos. You couldn't be any more left-wing. And I love it. How's it going? What happened?

People from Chad moving to your fucking place? Amazon is temporarily relocating employees from the company's downtown Seattle office after an uptick of violent crime rocked the area. Really? What the hell's going on out here? Liberal politics. Roughly 1,800 employees are assigned to the office space on 3rd Avenue and Pine Street in the heart of the city, but many of the employees are still working remotely, Amazon said in a statement to KOMO News. Given recent incidents, here's some more sanitized language for you.

Given to recent incidents, not violent crime, incidents. You know, an old lady dropping a cup of coffee. Somebody dropping a cheese. Near 3rd Avenue and Pine Street. We're providing employees currently at that location with alternative office space elsewhere. Translation, because of the fucking violence and lawlessness this governor has brought on, this mayor, both, we have to move our shit. People that we vote for and support. How you going, Bezos? He doesn't care.

An Amazon spokesman said in an email statement to the outlet, we are hopeful that conditions will improve. Talking about like it's a snowstorm. Cond conditions will improve, what, on their own? And that we will be able to bring employees back to this location when it is safe to do so. Can you imagine? What a bland statement. Who gives a fuck what you think? Instead of just saying, because of lawlessness and violence

and the safety of our employees, because of incidents, because they know they supported this politically, Violence and the safety of our employees because of incidents. Because they know they supported this politically. Their CEO. Recent violent crimes in the area include the fatal shooting of a 15-year-old boy on March 2nd. The shooter is still at large as of Monday. In another horrible incident, a homeless man was reportedly stabbed in his sleep on March 4th right around the corner from the Amazon office on 4th Avenue. How much want to bet he ordered the knife from Amazon? A day later, police shot and killed an armed suspect who had rammed his car into a federal building and fired a rifle

in the downtown area. I love it. There's your lib politics, you jerk-offs, all you people who vote them. This is you. This is what you stand for. The violent surge prompted the Seattle Police Department to set up a mobile precinct along 3rd Avenue, where officers on bikes now regularly patrol the area. Oh, they're on bikes. You can't even put them on motorcycles, you pussies. Some fucking rapist being chased by a guy with a Schwinn and a bell on his... Ding, ding, slow down. Ding, ding. Seattle Mayor Bruce Harrell's office. Look at this chump. Yeah, he looks brilliant. Guy looks like one of the drug dealers at Ozark. Anybody watch Ozark? Great show. A little highfalutin. watch Ozark? Great show.

A little highfalutin. It's dark as hell, and they get a little heavy with the cryptic um... You can tell the writers almost are like showing off at how smart they are. It gets a little cryptic. You have to really... But Jason Bateman is just... Plays the same guy he plays in every show.

No emotion, and he makes me laugh. I mean, his wife could get like shot, and he'd just, well, just swell off to think about what to do. He doesn't. It's fine. It's well-written shit. Again, I try to block out the little messages Hollywood sends me, but it's a good show.

By the way, they shot a lot of that, that casino boat, fucking two miles from here, the boat on the river. Anyways, back to this jagoff. Seattle Mayor Bruce. By the way, I got the chills still, and I'm waking up sweaty still. I got long COVID or whatever the fuck they call it. I never get over that. I'm still, last night, Dallas, I wake up, I go like this.

My hands are shining. And I'm freezing in the morning. And then I'm fine. Anyways, I'll be dead soon. I better get rid of this. John, it was that way last night, too. Anyways, I'll be dead soon. I better get rid of... Gianna was that way last night too. Well, she should have called me. What?

Who? She was too? Yeah, but she's just sweating because it was warm in the apartment. She's not sick, right? Dallas was like, no, I was on top of her. Seattle Mayor Bruce Harrell's office told Fox News, by the way, that reminds

me, Fox cameraman got killed last night covering the war. And Benjamin Hall was in the, I think the car got struck or whatever the fuck. Killed. He's like, literally the best foreign, you know, he covers all wars and stuff. They say he's like the best cameraman. And Benjamin Hall is the guy that took a little zing at Gutfeld that I mentioned anyway. Anyways, Harrell's office, that's him. Mayor, told Fox News, listen to this. Listen to this bland, shitty statement. He's working to make the downtown safer,

but it may take some time. You're a wormy cocksucker, you know that? It may take some time. You're a wormy cocksucker, you know that? It may take some time. Does anybody in the press go, why is that? How hard is it to break out a fire hose and clean the filth up the sidewalk, meaning the mentally ill? Seriously, how hard is it just to fucking arrest them for loitering? Make something up. Get creative like you do when it's somebody that you don't like or don't, you know.

It's going to take a while. Trump would clear that up in an hour if you let him. Why would that take a long time? Giuliani didn't fuck around in New York. Dude, and I saw the difference. I was living there when I first moved there and the squeegee guys in every corner, homeless, you're stepping over homeless.

I went out to LA for a year by myself, stupidest thing I ever did. Came back a year later, I thought I was in a different city. It was that noticeable. I get in a cab and I remember going from LaGuardia. And I'm like, where are all the, oh, no, the Giuliani, take care of everything.

Nothing. There was garbage stacked up in New York when I left. That was gone. So somebody can make a difference. This guy can't get rid of 20 homeless people on the sidewalk. Because that would be, you know, whatever. No, no, no, no! Oh, somebody's angry.

In our FLA segment tonight, a 14-year-old Florida, this is a classic Florida story, student was arrested last week after school employees found a kill list on the teen's phone. He was arrested because Biden wasn't on it. Did I mention it was a red screen? No, that's a joke, folks. On the teen's phone, authorities said, and he said when they found the list. What murder?

Faculty members at Westgate K-8 school in Port St. Lucie notified deputies of the chilling list last Tuesday. The student was charged with eight felony counts of written threats to kill, I'm guessing probably a white kid, I'm guessing, and, you know, the other guy that beat the Asian woman half to death. You know, he had, what, seven felonies already? Treat him with kid gloves. This kid will never see the light of half to death. You know, he had, what, seven felonies already? Treat him with kid gloves. This kid will never see the light of day, hopefully.

Written threats to kill, according to St. Lucie County Sheriff's Office. Little punk. I'm going to fucking smash his fucking face in. As the deputy searched the student's home for weapons, they discovered cocaine and drug paraphernalia, allegedly belonging to the teen's mother. Seen here, one hot piece of ass named Brooklyn Hinkles. Look at that, 40 years old in what, German shepherd years?

Holy, she's ready for St. Patrick's Day. Bet you she was a piece of ass before she started doing a pound and a half of coke with her breakfast cereal. God. They had a meeting about her, I guess, and they were talking to people. She went to rehab, and the sheriff interrupted the meeting and said, Well, I don't want to break up the meeting or nothing, but she's something of a cunt, ain't she, Doc? How do you mean that? She likes a rigged game, you know what I mean?

I love the show so much, it makes me hard. Anyways, Hinkle, that's her, was charged with drug possession and child neglect. The teen was taken to the Department of Juvenile Justice. The mother was booked into St. Lucy's Four Seasons Hotel. No. St. Lucy's County Jail and held on $6,250 bond.

I can't wait. No picture of the kid or anything, huh? Yeah. Oh, that's right. How old was he? Oh, boy. I like him at that age. Remember in Boogie Nights, the colonel was in jail?

He goes, I just can't help it. They're so cute at that age. I'm like, ugh, get the hell out of here. All right, let's move on, shall we? Tom the Terrible is a story, again, doesn't have national implications, but I thought it was a great example of how the left just comes out and lie to your fucking face, even at a local level. This guy for Jersey, he's up for some type of re-election,

and he's talking to workers in his way. I just couldn't believe what he was saying coming out of his mouth. Sounded like Dean Abedaya, that fucking idiot. In the video exclusively obtained by Breitbart News, Tom Malinowski was asked at a town, at a town? Oh, hall. I'm seeing hail. At a town hail event, what Congress was doing to protect educators

and our students and their identity. One of the crazy things happening in America right now is we've got a political movement that says they care about kids because the way they express that care is by banning books. He's talking about Republicans. When he says banning books, he's talking about the CRT shit,

the sex shit. When in actuality, who's more into censorship, left or right? Banning books? You guys just do a high-tech version of that. Anything you don't like, you vote,

you label, like the don't say gay bill, which again is just taking, that's a bill that doesn't allow parents, I mean teachers, to talk to your kids K through 3 about transgenderism and homosexuality. That's so outrageous. And you guys label it don't say gay. And you want that gone. You guys want laws gone. And he says they don't want to do a damn thing about the guns.

Really? Let me see. Out of all the murders last year, first of all, can we get into race? Let's break it down that way. And secondly, what was it, 90% of them handguns or more? Which means most of the NRA members who are hunters, by the way. And all probably illegally got anyway.

Illegally. Well, he'll say that's another argument for, you know, ruining the Second Amendment. ruining the Second Amendment. So, let's take a look at, where is he? Budweiser? Here he is speaking to some local, probably some local union workers. Go ahead. A single kid in a class raised their hand and said,

you know, Congressman, there's this book in the library that I shouldn't be allowed to read. For God's sakes. And yet there is this fringe movement that... Pause. He calls a fringe movement. By fringe movement, he means parents who go to board meetings and give a fuck about their children and tell them school boards to knock this shit off. That's a fringe movement to him. Go ahead. The Senate on our school boards that is targeting our teachers, targeting our educators, that is drowning out the voices of parents, Democratic and Republican, who

just want their kids to have a quality education. Pause. You hear the lies coming out? Drowning out parents, both Republican and... No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. They just want the kids to have a quality education. Yes, that includes math, science, English, history. Not gender studies.

Not teaching kids about transgender and homosexuality in the second fucking grade. What a lying... This is... This is it. And this isn't even the fucking national, this guy's up for, he's vulnerable and appeared to go on a tirade against parents taking issue with what their children are learning in school. Let's go to the next video. freedom of the mind. You've got people back low struggling with high gas prices. And I'm happy to be that people come to me and say Democrats are in power right now. What are you doing about that? That is fair. That is fair. We've got gun violence in our schools. We've got a climate crisis that is resulting in four feet of water being

dumped in the basements of residents. Pause. He just brings up climate problems. What? Yeah, exactly. In other words, things that can't be solved for another 20 years. That's what the Dems run on. People will be gone by then, or whatever.

And by the way, according to Al Gore, Miami should have been underwater already for 10 years, because he said that about 25 years ago. And you people, and you know what, I read something, it really is, most of that green environmental shit, guaranteed Russians are writing that shit. That's what some guy had a great article, I don't even remember what the website was,

about you're pushing that green environment, who's at help? Get the United States off fossil fuel. Why is that? And jerk-offs like this fall for it. Anyways, go ahead. Those are real problems. Hold me accountable for dealing with those problems. Pause. We will hold you accountable for dealing with those problems.

Real problems. But gender, using the right the right pronouns not a real problem which it is to him oh my god you know I came up in his fuck face my point is a problem you're a fucking problem that's a fucking doctor why on King Jam rag our King spunk bubble I'm telling you H you keep looking at me I'm gonna put you in a fucking ground I promise promise you. Not this time. You pompous, stuck-up, snot-nosed, English, giant, twerp, scumbag, fuck-faced, dickhead, asshole. Yeah? A fair fact.

We're on to another story. No, this is a related story that Dale has found. I saw this, too, online. This is a mother at a school board meeting. Dallas found. I saw this, too, online. This is a mother at a school board meeting, Fairfax, I'm guessing Virginia, where it's, that state's going to turn. I'm going to say my nipples, but they're kind of brown. But this is a mother, a concerned mother, at a school board meeting,

reading from a book that's available to high school students, probably younger too, but they won't. She's going to read some of it. She reads from two books she checked out that were available in her kids' school library. And I want you to listen to the reaction to the jerk-off, elitist, leftist assholes who she's reading to go ahead from the author maya kababe maya kababe i love her i can't wait to have your cock in my mouth i am going to give you the blow job of your life and then i want you inside me end quote how can i get my wife this book jonathan evison what if i told you i touched another guy's dick? Big deal. I have two. What if I told you I sucked it? I was 10 years old, but it's true.

I sucked Doug Goebel's dick. Not Doug Goebel! And he sucked mine, too. Listen to this. This is not an oversight at Fairfax High School. I'm sorry. There are children in the audience here. Pause. Pause. Pause. Pause. There are children in the audience here. Do not interrupt. Pause, pause, pause, pause. There are children in the audience here. Yeah, that's the whole point. There are children in school reading this shit, you dumb cunt. Can you imagine being that ignorant?

There are children here? First of all, why are they there at a board meeting? And you'll find children where else? Usually at a school. Go ahead. Do not interrupt my time. I love it. And you'll find children where else? Usually at a school. Go ahead. My time? Do not interrupt my time. I love it.

I would like to remind everybody that we have a speaker. I will stand here until my time is restored and my time is finished. These books are in stock and available in the libraries of Robinson, Langley, and Anaheim. Pause. For high school students, ma'am. That's your defense. Come on. You don't want your 14-year-old freshman daughter to learn about cock and the ass? What are you, some type of

Pollyannish prude? Is that it? I like her standing at ground. I'm not leaving until I... Can you imagine being so ignorant to go, there are kids in the, that's why she's reading it. To let you know kids are being exposed,

why do you care that kids are exposed to it? Oh, you're faking it, for the time being. My sister's ass. Anyways. That's it, right? That's enough of that. I tell you no kids. I told you no kiss. I told you no kiss.

Why, you stupid fuck. Why, look at you now. Hey, Omar. Yeah, your fucking, uh, your friend was saying a piece of shit, you know? I had to cancel his contract. He doesn't fucking listen. Tony. What happened? he doesn't fucking listen Tony

what happened what happened I know because a friend gave that speech he wasn't supposed to give to oh fuck that we'll do another day okay anyways that is it ladies and gentlemen and right here

don't forget the Comics Gym. Thecomicsgym.com. Thecomicsgym.com. Sign up. Could you? Working way too hard at the age of 60. Don't forget patreon.com. You can sign up there, too.

Nickdip.com. Click on my tour button or the store for merchandise. And cameo.com if you would like me. Cameo.com if you'd like me to roast a friend or relative. It doesn't have to be a roast. I can just, you know, zingers. I think people think I'm going to do 20 minutes like I do at a Comedy Central. A few zingsanglers.

I'm busy. I get pizza to make. I get a wife not to look at. It's our anniversary today, by the way. 19 years. Today's the 15th, right? Yeah. I think it's today.

Haven't missed one yet? Yeah, 19 years. Dated her for nine before that. That's 28 years. How tired is she of my average white prick? I don't know. Let's go to the... Yeah, we'll go to Fuddruck and say,

did I get a bottle of wine? Watch him pawn. That is it. Mom, I was only kidding if you're watching. You dirty little wench. Is that it? Can I get it all? You think it. I'll it you're you're very welcome

we'll see you back here um tomorrow at the same time bye I'm free Oh, my God. Outro Music