The Nick DiPaolo Show - Free At Last! | Nick Di Paolo Show #1592

Episode Date: June 26, 2024

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about the Panthers win, Assange free, Another missing tourist and more! Support today's sponsors: Get a complimentary bottle of Nugenix Total T plus a bottle of Nugenix Thermo X FREE when you text NICK to 231-231 Get your new 3-month unlimited wireless plan for just $15/month. Head to https://www.mintmobile.com/NICKDIP Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

Music playing The Antichrist. You got me in a vendetta kind of mood. Welcome to the show on a Wednesday how are you folks great to be with you Wednesday sure I feel like I'm Dallas right now doing a show with another guy anyways good to have you aboard yeah check me out tomorrow night on Crowder or this morning he's might have saw me Crow. Tomorrow night on Crowder, or this morning, as you might have saw me, Crowder tomorrow night streaming live, the debate. I think the world is going to be curious.

I would think the ratings would be through the roof, just to see if Biden can make it to the stage, or not shit his pants. I can't believe they're going through with it. It's fucking insane. They must really not have a bench. I mean, Trump should just be like over the top nice to the point where he doesn't even try.

That's right, Joe. Because if you compare their records, that's all they'd have to do, sarcastic. No, you're right. You had a better economy. Imagine if he just said that. No, you're right. The crime is way down. There's no strife as far as race or the Middle East.

You brought the war here to us. Jews are getting attacked in American cities. But you know, I think life's better under you that he could just do that for 90 minutes and It would fucking shine a light on how and it would give them nowhere to go. That's right. How do you answer that? That's a he'd go away, but but it fucking short-circuit smoke would come out of the fucking They're gonna have them drugged up you're gonna seem doing this shit like his son Right the middle they go holy shit hunters in the side holding a little baggie shaking it yeah I was gonna say hunters in his airpiece going dad wipe

your nose wipe your nose just had powdered doughnut wipe it my nose okay what am I doing I am, I'm just so curious. I didn't think that would happen in a million years. And I'm still right, he's not going to be the nominee. I think it's going to be such a bad show and they're using this so they can say, look, even we can't. It's a nice way to let the world know. If not, I mean, you've got to be, you really think he's got another four years? Maybe they want him

the other theory is that because he beat him last time, which he didn't, but this is their theory. He's the only one that can come close. So let's say if he beats him then we replace. We just need him to get over the finish line. But he's been shitting blood since lap 2 If you know what I'm saying anyhow, yeah, so that's I Just I'm so excited. I can't sleep. It's gonna be hilarious. I think Trump's gonna go easy. He's been given hints He's at that cheese steak place and he's asking people for advice and people he's not just being an idiot he's actually asking people should I go nice on him or should I care him apart of course all the Philly you're asking Philly fans they threw ice balls at fucking Santa Claus in 1975 at their own teams yeah at their own

teams yeah ask them if she should go rough or be nice. Oh, anyways, that's going to be, I'm telling you, I think just the curiosity. He could die during the debate. What history books that would make, huh? Reading 100 years. You always read about Lincoln and whoever the fuck, Douglas. How did I remember that? Yeah, Michael Douglas and Lincoln. Michael Douglas, yeah.

All right, let's get on to it as you know I'm a huge hockey fan and the NH it's June 25th and the season just ended when barbara you all scored the winning goal in 1970 when I was 8 that was I think May 10th again I'm sure there's a lot less teams, but Jesus. That's almost a month and a half more. Guys, hockey starts up again like training camp in September. And it's not a sport like baseball where you stand around and not get hit.

That's why there aren't too many repeats in NHL hockey anymore. You used to have dynasties like the Islanders at Edmonton. The Panthers, why don't I fucking bet? There's always one or two bets a year that I'm like, again, people are going to, sure thing, how could you think that? Because I just, I don't know. The coach has coached the Longston history without getting a cup. For the first time in history, the Florida Panthers, first longest in history without getting a cup so uh... for the first time in history the florida path is first time in the history

stanley cup champions uh... here's a little bit of the excitement in the countdown of the final seconds twenty seconds to go listen to that play great game too by the way twelve seconds to go Florida trying to end it up against the wall which would be fitting three seconds to go how frustrating

I feel bad for that guy. Conor McDavid, best player on the planet, doesn't have a cup yet. And he got the most valuable player of the whole playoffs? He wasn't even out there to get the trophy. How can you blame them? You go into the locker room, well they have to shake hands, but after they shook hands and all that shit, you want to go into the locker room with the rest of the team, right? I think he's the captain. If even if he's not, you want to be in the, you're not going to go, I'm going to go get my MVP trophy. You know what I mean? It's actually classy

not to. Also in enemy territory in enemy territory yeah they I mean they booed not and they didn't boo because they don't like him they thought their goalie Bobrovsky could have got it who was unbelievable in the first the three middle games no the first three games he was like tremendous then he kind of sagged a little bit so and this guy had more points in the playoffs than Gretzky one more point than Greta, so I mean

anyways Happy for Florida. I just like that team their coach likes the rough shit. He likes to curse a lot He's polite when he has to be because I think he's a Canadian He's lost more games than any other and a head coach only because he's been coaching as Long second longest I think he started head coach when because he's been coaching as long second longest I think he started head coach when he was 28 and Hartford anyways I'm happy you think I was from Florida but anyways they fucked the Bruins last year and they say we're gonna make it all the way back and win it and they did that's

hard to do it was a 2-1 game thriller a Monday night over the Ebon to oil us to score a 4-3 series victory In the cup final the wind staved off a historic collapse after the Oilers rallied from a 3-0 deficit to tie the series at 3 after allowing 18 goals in consecutive losses in games 4 through 6 Florida's defense returned to form Monday night anchored by a stellar performance from goaltender. I wouldn't say stellar He didn't have that much work, believe it or not, Sergei Bobrovsky, who turned back 23 of 24 Edmonton shots,

including a late Oilers flurry that threatened a tie. He was on his back like a fucking kick in his legs, the puck was loose, it was insane. It is really, and you hear pro basketball players, you hear NFL players say it, they go, playoff hockey is, it's insane. And it really is the hardest trophy to win because your playoffs go on for months,

seven game series sometimes. And like I said, it's not baseball, you're fucking, don't get hit, it's fucking brutal. Edmonton's Conor McDavid got the Con Smythe Trophy as the most valuable player of the entire cup playoffs, despite his team's loss, and he could admit his suicide this morning at the age of 27 he's the sixth player at NHL history to win the award from a losing team and What a hockey player he is, but he didn't last night. I don't even know that he had any shots on that

It was fucking insane and you guys gonna not for the hockey. I can't help it folks. I'm a heterosexual. I don't like musicals Like to cook though Anyhow good for that I Could have sworn they had won a cup before but I confuse all my Florida Tampa all these teams came in Carolina Tampa at around the same time and I thought they were one of the ones that had already Won a cup but good for Paul Maurice. Hey guys in the second half of the show

I'll be talking about the US Navy has a new Drone capable submarine. I don't even know what that means But it's fucking shaped like a stingray you know the fish it's insane and it can stay in the bottom of the ocean for I don't know it can hide out there it's fucking insane but you better have it because I know Russians pumping out shit they're testing it three miles off of Miami also our new cultural divide in this country, raw milk versus regular pasteurized milk. Is there anything, anything we can fucking agree on? But I thought that was interesting.

Anyways, get full episodes of the Nick DePolari. It's light on politics today, I've got to be honest. Biden's been hiding for a week. He's got 28 people preparing him. Honest to God, 16 people preparing him. And Trump's just fucking going around. Hey, how are you? I'm gonna kick his ass. Get full episodes of my show, Louder with Crowder, four days a week.

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See you soon. I don't know what the fuck. WikiLeaks' father, Julian Assange, remember him? I wonder if that's a picture from a while ago. He didn't look too healthy the last time I saw him. Will plead, remember Pam Anderson went to visit him? What the fuck? I'll sell secrets for that. I don't care if she's 58. WikiLeaks' father, Julian Assange,

will plead guilty to one count of conspiring to obtain and disclose national defense information as part of a plea agreement with the United States Department of Justice. Assange had been detained at Belmarsh, a security prison in the United Kingdom since April of 2019 after British authorities arrested him in the Ecuadorian embassy. I've been there many times. They have a pickleball mic. Pickleball is funny any way you say it.

Pop it into any sentence. There he is getting on Trump's plane. The DOJ had accused Assange of working with former, and you guys will remember this hee shee, U.S. Army intelligence analyst Chelsea Manning. Do we have a picture of Chelsea? remember this he she us army intelligence analysts chelsea manning yet do we have a picture of chelsea no are you trying to save it some out of this thing

i mean tell what i'm not chelsea manning it's what we have to pick it powerpoint probably didn't like it all right whatever formerly known as Bradley Manning in order to steal and disclose classified documents in May 2019 Assange was charged with an 18 count superseding indictment from the D oh no a superseding indictment from the D. Oh no a superseding indictment. Is that like a supersonic indictment from the DOJ? I read the definition and it would bore the shit out of you. Here he is at Hooters looking out the window of the parking lot.

Assange's plea agreement with the DOJ comes after London's High Court. Do they wear powdered wigs? Allowed him to appeal his extradition to the United States. So you know, people are like, well, the U.S. military complex and blah, blah, blah, they do evil things. So some people are behind what he was doing and other people are like, what the fuck? You going to put our secrets out there?

So you know, I report, I'll let my sister decide that's my new that's our new thing here at the show report if you don't have a sister let your dog anyhow but he was they I remember when they showed him in London we had this guy on the show when I first started the show where did I have him? I had him in studio on my radio show in New York. Randy Critecold, old comedian friend of mine, older than me, far left lunatic. But he would follow, he flew to fucking London, he was involved in this. His name was mentioned, his name was mentioned in the New York Times a few times having correspondence with Assange

for some, whatever the fuck. We had him on and then he lost his mind. He thought it shit all over me on Facebook. Coco, a very interesting dude. I can't remember what his take was. I think he was a supporter of Assange because I know he hates the U.S. government. Every time I would say to Randy Randy if you hate the government so much what he moved to another country and he would give the line because I don't want

to be a victim of this country's foreign policy I don't know if that's his line or Barry Cremens Barry Cremens said it too who's a what he's dead now comedian from from the Boston not from Boston but that's where he started the whole Boston comedy so he was like a fucking Marxist. I mean, Randy, get along good. Anyways, I've heard them both say it. So that's that. Hey, if you're paying more than 15 bucks a month for your cell phone plan, you're doing

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Speeds slower above 40 gigabytes on unlimited plan. Additional taxes, fees, and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details. We thank them for sponsoring the show today. Good product. Let's move on shall we? A downward missing dog. What in God's name is that? Well a Chicago woman. I only report this because this is happening a lot all over the world. I think you should stay home for the next, I don't know, 20 years Americans because you're not seem to be popular anywhere. Even though we've been the most benevolent superpower this planet's ever

seen so fuck all you people a Chicago woman has been missing since last week when she vanished during a yoga retreat in the Bahamas and now her desperate family believes she's in danger Taylor Casey seen here Okay well, I Mean if they sketch her You know like you could do a sketch of that and I don't want my point that she's making me nervous. That's my point Taylor Casey

Was last seen on Wednesday around Paradise Island, which is near the crime-ridden city of Nassau. That place has been a bit of a hole for a long time, right, Dallas? According to a missing person bulletin by the Royal Bahama Police Force, I'm sure they're tremendous training. Casey traveled to the Caribbean, if you want to say Caribbean, country for the Sivananda Ashranda ashram yoga retreat I did that I pulled the muscle second day there they put me on the aisle before she went missing according to a press release issued by the family on Monday the

retreat about these yogis retreats remember the Guatemala yes we were around for yes that was a yoga thing too, wasn't it? Yeah downward facing corpse That's the new one go on one of these fuckers I wouldn't put my head down for a second Warrior two The retreat center said casey didn't attend morning classes on thursday after she was last seen the evening before according to the uh... cbs news so everybody's like what the fuck where is she

hello well she's not in the uh... ashram i think that's what they call it i learned this word from janice Soprano. She hooked up with the baddest guy in television, the best bad guy, Richie Apriel. And then they got married, and they had a little party

at the house. And she goes, I don't know why. I've been gone to the country. I don't know why I thought I was going to find my soul mate in an ashram in Bagash. Some fucking. Just a fucking. Anyway, sorry I'm obsessed.

The ashram is asking anyone with information on Miss Casey to contact the local police, the retreat center per the outlet. And again, I'm reporting this because it's happening a lot everywhere. And not just going missing. Rapes, killings here and there. going missing, rapes, killings here and there. The interim, it is collaborating, wait, in the interim, I'm sorry, it's collaborating with the authorities on their investigation.

Casey's family is expected to travel to the Bahamas, yeah, I think they should, this week to assist in the search according to the Facebook group, loved ones described Casey as an intelligent, deeply caring, thoughtful, and very flexible person. No, and joyful person who has been practicing yoga for 15 years. I mean, you know, she's doing what she loves. You go on. I mean, you travel. That's living and stuff.

But I wonder if she's over there by herself. The American tourist disappearance comes as the United States State Department warned travelers earlier this year to exercise increased caution in the Bahamas, including Nassau, because of crime. Violent crime, any safer than the cities over here? At least, hey, if I'm going to get murdered, I want to do it on a nice beach. Violent crimes such as burglaries, armed robberies, and sexual assaults occur in both Taurus and non-Taurus areas. See, that's the difference.

It used to be you go to Jamaica, there was always sketchy neighborhoods you didn't go to, or a lot of these islands, including Nassau. But now, I mean, if you look at Mexico, people go to Mexico. I'm no this is warrior two Yeah, so be careful out there as they used to say on NYPD blue I think Hey folks I think we can all agree getting old sucks if you're experiencing the consequences of aging low energy bad moods and even problems in the bedroom Hey, they following me? It's time to get Nugenics Total T made with a powerful

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Hey for those of you guys in mug club stick around for the second half of the show. Everyone else, go to nickdip.com and join to get my full show, Steven Crowder's full show and a whole lot more. And while you're at nickdip.com, click on the tour button and you will see these dates coming up August 9th at the Jacksonville Center for the Performing Arts. That's on a Friday night, I believe. I shouldn't say that but I think it is. The very next night August 10th the Gas South Theatre in Duluth, Georgia. Two beautiful venues. Things are looking up stand-up wise. I gotta tell you I'm excited. I haven't really hit the market like I wanted to down here.

So I hope to see you guys out there. Hi good night everybody I won't take all that they hand me down And make out a smile though I wear a frown And I'm not gonna take it all life down Cause once I get started I go to town Cause I'm not like everybody else, no no I'm not like everybody else, no no I'm not like everybody else I'm not like everybody else, no no I'm not like everybody else And I don't wanna live my life like everybody else

And I don't wanna be destroyed Not everybody else, and I don't wanna get a job Not everybody else, cause I'm not like everybody else See you singing, what are you? I'm not like everybody else