The Nick DiPaolo Show - Inslee: "Word Marijuana Racist" | Nick Di Paolo Show #699

Episode Date: April 27, 2022

Big Biden to cover Little Biden bills. Trump treads on trannies. Crazy old man golf. Madison Cawthorn busted with gun. Marijuana racist?

🎵 Oh yeah, oh yeah, how are you folks? Welcome to the show on a Wednesday. I hate to start off again the same way I have the last two shows, but the fucking Red Sox did it to me again. Two nights ago, I sent a text to my brother saying, what a bullpen they have this year. Somehow triggering some voodoo spell on them. They've imploded the left.

One time, well, two nights ago, Story made a throwing error. The game would have been over, so you can't really. But Jesus Christ. They had that game where they were getting no hit for nine innings. They go ahead in the 10th

and fucking lose in the bottom of 10th. Then last, two nights ago, Dante Bichette hits a walk-off grand slam to beat him. Last night, they get two runs on the frickin' top of the eighth to go ahead, whatever the fuck, two-nothing or whatever, and blow it in the bottom of the ninth. Three nights in a row, after I yapped my brother. Sounds like a closing issue. But up to this point, they've been, you know.

But here's the other thing, and not to make excuses, but Cora is not on the trip, the manager. He's not with him because Toronto, you have to be like double vaxxed. It's ridiculous. Or vax once, a booster, whatever. Or it's ridiculous. Or Vax wants a booster, whatever. And he tested for COVID and whatever the fuck.

So I'm sure he's fine. Because the baseball, they have it now where they actually check day to day. They don't just say you're gone for two weeks or whatever. They've loosened that up a little. So once again, the chinks ruined my Red Sox. Nick that's racist. I know. That's why I can't break into the big leagues. But you guys love it. I love it. And we need more of it. You know why? Elon Musk. He's gonna open the doors. Do you see the reaction? I'm getting off base here for the first story but do you see the react? What more do you need to know about Democrats and people who are shitting their pants

over the thought of actual free speech? That's all about them not having control over us. They are shitting their pants on the left. It shows you that they are Marxists to the core. The lead attorney that was responsible for blocking Trump off of Twitter actually was, and it had a tearful message she was issuing to everybody crying about Twitter. Yeah, that's Vajayagad. That's her name. Vajayagad, yeah. Yeah, that's what I said.

She's in charge of censoring words and her first name is Vajayagad. Slang for vagina. Gadzooked. Yeah, I wrote a whole chunk on her today for somebody. But anyways, back to the, yeah. Unfreaking real. I can't believe the reaction.

They're saying the dumbest shit. They're accusing him of being racist and sexist. That's all they got now. It doesn't matter. They used to use that when it kind of fit got now. It doesn't matter. They used to use that when it kind of fit the argument. It doesn't matter now. You could steal,

I don't know, you steal a pink flamingo off a white lady's front lawn and you could be white yourself and you're racist and such. It's fucking insane. And it's what keeps them alive. They're hanging by a thread now. And that's what the must thing is going to expose the algorithms they use to block people like me.

And by the way, I told my manager I want back on. I don't even know if I'm not on Twitter, right? Dallas, you don't post shit to Twitter right because uh when Trump got booted I told Tommy take me the fuck off otherwise I'm a hypocrite sitting here saying this and I'm on Twitter you know so now I want back on I heard Gutfeld and somebody else saying like they in the last couple days have added a couple thousand. I guess, I don't know if the unshadow banning is already happening, but I want back on so I can break new boundaries and get kicked off by a guy I agree with, Elon Musk. He goes, look, I'm from South Africa. I can't even say that shit. Anyhow, let's get to it. Well, this is sort of related because it's fucking biden and all his

scumbag friends that you know are shitting their pants and i like the way biden couches the argument uh yeah nobody you know nobody should be victim of too many restrict but like like both sides like it doesn't go one way like the right you know i do you know, and this is a real statistic, 99% of the people on Twitter vote Democrat. That's funny. It's a liberal cesspool, and they are shitting their pants. That's their thing. All right. The big guy will pay Hunter's bills.

I think we know who the big guy is, right? That's right. John Bon Jovi. That would have been funny if I said it right. You're the big guy. You're Kevin McDonald. My go-to name, Kevin, on stage. Anytime I have to grab a guy's name. Something funny about Kevin. Everybody knows a fucking Kevin. Isn't that something funny about Kevin? Everybody knows a fucking Kevin. Anyways, President Joe Biden, are they still calling him president? Agreed to cover more than, listen to this, $800,000 in bills racked up by his son. My dad used to complain when I scratched the car or fucking asked for booze money. Including legal fees tied to the winding down of his controversial overseas business dealings ahead of the 2020 election. You remember the story, right?

When they buried his laptop. According to an email that surfaced on Tuesday, of course, Joe said, I don't know nothing about that. His hunter paring over Trump's wall. The email, that's what Trump should have done, made a wall of money. The email and his attached spreadsheet detailing the debts call into question Biden's repeated claim that he's never discussed son Hunter Biden's business with him. What a dink. You're lying. And you're a piece of shit.

We know that. Tony Bobulinski told us. The January 17, 2019 message was written by Hunter Biden's then personal assistant, Katie Dodge. Just sounds hot. And Katie by the door. And sent to accountant Linda Shapiro, who spells Shapiro with an E, founder of the Global Deez firm in Leesburg, Virginia. I spoke with Hunter today regarding his bills, Dodge wrote. It is my understanding that Hunt's dad will cover these bills in the short term as Hunter transitions into his career. As what? Runway model? Get out of here. Or maybe his painting job. Guy should be painting garages. Anyhow, so right there, right there, there's proof.

Do you really think Biden consented on paying these bills without being, you know, told about it? No, shut your fucking piehole. George's email, which included the greeting, hello, VP team, was cc'd to Hunter Biden and Richard Ruffner, who was a personal aide to Joe Biden while he was vice president, after he left office. And during his winning White House bid, liars, the spreadsheet shows Hunter Biden's debts, including more than 130 large, as the Italians say,

in legal fees due ASAP to the law firm of FIG, Baker, Daniels. They're very good. I slipped in a supermarket. They got me 11 bucks. With $28,382 owed for a BHR restructuring. That was for Biden's hair plugs. That appears to be a reference to the Chinese company Bohai Harvest, RST, Shanghai Equity Investment. They're very good management.

They call it the Pacific Rim, in which Hunter Biden held a 10 percent stake through a company. You see how all this works? It goes through nine LLCs and can't trace it back through through a company called Scare Needles LLC. What the hell? BHR is primarily owned by Chinese investors, including the state-controlled Bank of China. Hunter Biden owed Fegra Baker another $20,000, almost $21,000, for Burnham restructuring, which appears to refer to the Burnham Financial Group, which former Hunter Biden business partner Devon Archer and others invested in as part of a plan to create their own financial service conglomerate. You see the layers upon layers. I'm not smart enough to cheat. I can't even

understand it. They know all the loopholes, all the laws. You don't think Biden does? Been in fucking politics for 80 years. But he never talked to his son about any of that shit. I'm supposed to believe Hunter just wrote himself a check out of daddy's. Folks, this guy's as dirty as a fucking $2 whore. Folks, this guy's as dirty as a fucking $2 whore. Where do you find a $2 whore? At the AIDS clinic.

Why are you bringing up AIDS? It doesn't even exist anymore. Kill it with orange juice. What? That was silly. Anyways, that's the end of that stupid story. Bottom line is Trump's a fu- I mean, excuse me. What did I say? Joe Biden is a lying sack of shit.

He didn't win the election. He's dirty. He's compromised by our biggest geopolitical foe, which is China. Do you understand that? He has no business being near the White House. But again, thanks to the rigging of the... I can't wait for November. I am more excited about that than the Super Bowl, the World Series.

I want to see if they have the nerve to steal another election. And if that doesn't bring the guns out in this country, what in God's name will? I'll tell you what, Will, if my guy Chris Guardino doesn't win American Idol, I'll take a shot at him. How gay is that that I like that show? Can't help it. It's some really talented people. Although there's a black kid trying to be a country singer, and he's got a pleasant voice, but it's nothing special.

And, you know, ABC got in fucking the judge's head and said, look, this guy's going to be in here at least till the end. Nick, you really? Yeah, I do. Shut the fuck up. Anyways, what's this called? Trump does something to trannies. Treads on trannies. Former President Donald Trump called

transgender athletes ridiculous, telling TV host Piers Morgan he agrees with a... You see? Boy, this Piers Morgan, him and Trump were close, and he's like, I'm starting a new global show. Who better than Trump? They pretended to have a big fight, remember? Now he's like, I'm starting a new global show. Who better than Trump? They pretended to have a big fight, remember?

Now he's chopping it up into the, it's going to be his first nine episodes. He knows what he's doing. How much money do these pigs need? Host Piers Morgan, he agrees, like Morgan, he, Trump, agrees with a ban on competitors born as men from taking part in women's sports. It's just so ridiculous. Trump responding to a question about controversial transgender swimmer Leah Thomas. What a beautiful... Put up Leah there.

Can we see that thing in all its glory? Your son looks like a fag to me. It's not my son. It's my daughter. That meme still made me laugh. I can't believe I missed that joke. I won that woman's swim race fair in Square. If they don't like it, they can suck my dick.

And said he sided with the U.K. Prime Minister, Boris Johnson, who suggested the ban also. Let's take a look at one of my, probably the greatest president ever. I mean, numbers like you've never seen. I mean, I killed terrorists, what, two, three million a day. Tremendous. Go ahead. Boris Johnson came out recently and said he would ban biological males, people born with biological male bodies who transition, he would ban them

from then competing in women's sport. Good. Do you agree with that? I do. I do. I agreed with it long before anybody else. I think it's ridiculous and it's sad. He's got the jump on all of us.

Long before anybody even knew what a dick or a pussy was. I invented the pussy, Pierce. I mean, I ate a lot of pussy. I never sucked a dick. But I can see that before all you guys did, I knew this was bad. I love him. Go ahead, Captain. It's bad for the Democrats because they're not going to do that.

One of the big questions being put to lots of politicians right now is, what is a woman? I'm not going to respond to the question, but a woman is... Pause! This is the world we're living in. This is the world we're living in. You ask a former president of the United States what a woman is, and they have to dodge it.

Just let that fucking sink into your skulls. I can't touch that one. Pierce, I know they have a pussy. Am I right? They got a pussy and Charlie Manson, they were talking about, what about women, Charlie? What about them? He goes, what about them?

He goes, and this is what he said. Charlie Manson goes, they're fine. They're soft. They smell good as long as they keep their mouths shut. That's what he said on the stand. God, he's my soulmate. Anyways, go ahead. A woman is somebody that swims at a certain time and doesn't get beaten by 38 seconds

by somebody that wasn't even a good swimmer as a male. 38 seconds by somebody that wasn't even a good swimmer as a male. First of all, they must have had a fight because he seems kerfuffle. A woman in some of that swims at a certain time. What do you mean, like noontime or after work at 8 p.m.? He meant to say as far as, you know, 200 meters in 30 seconds. At a certain time. Oh, God help him. By the way, I love him.

Donald Jr., I hope you're not watching. I'm just, he cracks me up. You can't answer. Nobody can answer that now without getting in trouble. People see it. This is Trump talking. And they won't put up with it, he said. They have a weightlifter where the record was

for 11 or 12 years. They put a half ounce, he goes. They have a weightlifter where the record was for 11 or 12 years. They put a half ounce, he goes. I should have left this one in. I didn't, right? He goes, they put a half ounce on each side and a woman lifts it. Then he goes, a guy comes along and breaks the record by numbers that you wouldn't even believe. Bigger than the ones I was doing. So I guess he feels the same way we're all tired of this garbage. Fucking queers! No, no, no, they're not queers.

No need of that talk, Pauly. What the fuck, T? This thing's got tits and a dick. Not for nothing. I take this broad out. She's got a fucking Adam's apple like a fucking Melanion. Anyways, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. Hi, I'm Mike Lindell.

Buy my slippers. I'm making, now I'm making nipple clamps from the finest leather. And this fucking guy puts my in front of everything. My dick suck. Hey, guys. This is Nick talking. Tomorrow will mark the 11th hundredth episode. It might even be more than that, to be honest with you.

I'm going with 11 because I'm counting the very day I started podcasting. The show wasn't in this format. There wasn't a visual component. But I still had to read and do my homework and whatever the fuck. And so what am I going to discount? Like two years that I did that way? And then we did this form of the show at my house for a year or two. So I know it's not 700.

I would go with 11, and I'm being very conservative. Anyways, today's the 11th episode of Nick DePaulo Show. It's actually way more. This is what Tommy wrote this. This is why I like him. He says it's actually way more than 700 if you count the previous incarnations of the show, but I can't get my manager Tommy to do his job

and give me an accurate tally. That's because he's in his restaurant right now, probably chewing out two illegals or actually working the fryer later himself. I get the only guy that has to have his fingers in nine businesses like fucking Sammy the Bull used to. Anyways, I absolutely would not have been able to get there. He got this right. Get here without the support from you guys.

Those of you who are monthly supporters or who make regular contributions, you're the backbone of the show. It doesn't happen without you. And those of you who buy Nick DiPaolo Show t-shirts and mugs, you also help as well. If you haven't recently chipped in, please go to nickdip.com and make a contribution or grab a shirt or a mug. This show is all about free speech. And you absolutely keep it going.

And I sincerely thank you for that. And it's the most honest show, okay? It's, um, eventually it'll be found out. And I'll have to say goodbye to you guys. Hopefully Musk will change the atmosphere. You know what I mean? Yeah, they blew it again last night.

Although my Boston Bruins beat the best team in hockey, the Florida Panthers. The world's upside down. Isn't it the best hockey? Tampa's a great team. Florida Panthers, they're not, you know, they have the most points in the league, 120-something. They're like 51-16. Bruins beat them last night.

Bruins played great. And, again, you guys don't give a fuck, but I'm talking to Dallas. I'm trying to introduce him to this. He likes girls' soccer. I don't understand. It's the tights. They have no tights. No. You want that?s. It's the props. No.

You want that? You watch girls softball. Volleyball. Well, yeah. They're in their panties. But I'm saying, pants-wise, of course, girls. I didn't even bring that one up. That was too easy.

But you ever see that watch girls softball? Oh, my God. It's pants fit. David Letterman mentioned that on his show. Is that a cup? Yeah. Nope. No. It's not a cup. I don't think. It's a bowl.

And I'm hoping it's a it's a good point today. You don't know. And I did that joke a long time ago. I was watching a girls college basketball game. I said I don't want to say these girls are gay, but the game was delayed like five minutes. The power forward got kicked in the balls for Connecticut.

I am so clever, it's sickening. What's the headline for the next story, ladies and gentlemen? Dog Leg Left. Tranquil Palm Beach County Golf Course exploded. Where isn't there gunfire in America? In gunfire Sunday after a 74-year-old member allegedly shot a man for walking his dog on the greens. I just picture a pit bull squatting next to the flag in the cup and dropping a deuce as

other retirees gawked from their balconies, according to police. Can you imagine? You're looking out your balcony, two old guys playing golf. Oh, fuck. That's coming from hole 13 robert levine originally a new yorker of course angry old jew now living in florida is facing attempted murder raps after confronting herbert merit 64 at the kings point golf course in del Beach. Let's go to the videotape. Children playing here.

Your family's having picnics. You should have a goddamn petting zoo. Instead, you got these stupid electric carts for you old men who have nothing better to do. Frank, Frank, what's wrong, Frank? Frank, Frank, what's wrong? Frank, Frank, Frank, are you okay? Aren't you ashamed of yourself? Oh, my God!

I gotta get some pills! What's wrong with you? Heart! Pills! Your heart? Pills! Something's wrong with your heart? What can I do?

Pills! Pills! Pills? Pills? Caddy check. Where are your pills? God! God! God! God! Pills. Pills. Caddy Jack. Where are your pills? Cards.

Well I guess you're out of luck aren't you? Your little cart's gonna drown. Now aren't you sorry you didn't let me pass through your golf course? Yeah. And now you're going to die wearing that stupid little hat. Line of the movie.

That's from Falling Down, folks. If you haven't seen it, it's been around for about 30 years. Michael Douglas is my favorite actor of all time. And holy guacamole. That's all I thought of when I read this story. Levine, the old angry Jewish guy, sped his vehicle up to Merritt and began berating him for the offense before pulling out a black handgun.

Don't you move, you motherfucker. I'll blow your brains out. Merritt took off running and tried to take cover near a course tree while Levine gave chase off foot, squeezed off several rounds. Four! Merritt eventually went down at the 15th hole after being struck in the ankle. Levine then

allegedly returned to his golf cart, retrieved a club, Nick, don't laugh, it's not funny, and began clobbering Merritt as he writhed on the ground. The reporter, he was pissed. I'm going to fucking smash his fucking face in.

This is my agent scene here. Saul Berkowitz. One witness saw the chaos unfold from his balcony overlooking the course and called the police. He told officers that he saw Levine kick Merritt in the head at one point, apparently imitating young black thugs. Responding officers arrived to find Levine standing over Merritt on the course

with four 9mm shell casings nearby. Next thing that happened was they heard Bill Mickelson yelling. He was in a foursome and they were slowing it up. Merritt was taken to a local hospital with non-life-threatening injuries. They think he'll be ready for the British Open.

Levine was also taken. The guy who was the bad guy, that's not him, by the way. He just put a picture up. That looks like, you know who that looks like, fucking Hyman Roth. I'm just a Jew, golfing on a pension. I shot a guy at a hole tool. It's not a plaque.

Levine was also taken in for evaluation after suffering an unrelated medical episode at the scene. I wonder what he suffered. Police said they recovered a 9mm pistol from Levine, who remains hospitalized. So the guy that did the shooting is still in the hospital. Do I have another video? Oh, all right. What's, do I have another video? Oh. Male Speaker 1 in audience member 1 in audience

All right. Boy, the world's gone mad, has it not? You retired of Florida. That would be typical, a guy, you know, second day of retirement, somebody shoots you while you go. Remember, we talked about while you're gone. Remember, we talked about this on this show. I don't think you were here yet, Dallas,

but about Hoffa being buried down here with a golf course on what island? One of those islands. Huh? Wilmington Island, yeah. And the guy that worked at the hotel saw a plane land with a bunch of Italians from Chicago get out. You know, mafia boys. And they were golfing. Then when they got to whatever hole they thought was buried, they all started pissing.

Well, Capone commissioned that resort to be built. That's right. That's right. They had a whole thing on it on TV. It was fascinating. But the guy said, yeah, I saw all these Italian guys urinating on hole 17. What is the matter with you guineas? fascinating but i the guy said yeah i saw all these italian guys urinating on hole 17 swipe what is the matter with you guineas god damn it you guineas really make me laugh

um yeah sure well let's stay on the let's stay on guns shall we since it's america and we love them can you imagine if you took all seriously can you imagine if you took all, seriously, can you imagine if you took all the gun incidents that happened in all the inner cities and took them out of the statistics? Would there be a gun problem? No, and I'm not just saying it's minorities, but I'm just saying. I'm just saying. I'm just saying. The numbers would definitely.

Anyways, I say it because I'm an old white guy, and you guys keep picking on us and blaming us for everything. Fucking those numbers will be. Think about this. Anyways, outgunned. Do you guys know who Rep. Madison Cawthorn is? He's been on Gutfeld a few times, young kid in a wheelchair. We talked about him on this show.

He's the one a few weeks ago who said that D.C. was filled with cocaine and orgies. I don't know what his point was there. Maybe he's jealous, got no feeling below his, no, he's fine. Good-looking kid, you can't even tell he's in a chair. Anyways, he's a little interesting. Madison Cawthorn was cited for having, he's a Republican, a loaded gun at North Carolina Airport Tuesday,

which is a little alarming since he's a congressperson, right? It's the second time he was busted carrying a firearm in an airport since last year, authorities. What the fuck is going on? Danger, Will Robinson. Danger. Danger, Will Robinson. Danger. No, Will Robinson.

Danger. That's right. Ironsides. TSA, that's Transportation Security Administration, otherwise known as Minorities with Short Attention Spans, hitting on each other while I check my shoes. Ever see how unfocused?

Anyways, TSA workers found the loaded staccato 9mm handgun in Carthorne's bag during security screening at Charlotte Douglas, which is an airport I know all too well, because I've got to connect through there. It's a fucking zoo, too, by the way. International Airport.

This is the second time he's trying to get a gun on the... Who the fuck do you think you are? Who the fuck do you think you are? Who the fuck? That's him giving shit to the head TSA guy. Not a bad gun.

Carthorne was cooperative with responding officers and said he owned the gun, which was confiscated as part of normal protocol, the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department said in a series of tweets. The weapon was recovered at Checkpoint D around 9 a.m., the outlet said. The North Carolina Republican was cited for possession of a dangerous weapon on city property, the department said. He was released and police confiscated the gun. You all saw him.

He had a gun. He's crippled. Cops told the observer that it was standard protocol to not arrest a passenger on the misdemeanor charges unless there are other associated felony charges or extenuating circumstances, even though we let minor, remember, illegals in here, they didn't even have any, remember, they were using warrants that were out for them. Remember that, about six months ago, to let them in?

That's all they had for ID was, you can't, people, I can't make it up. Anyways, Carthorne 26 was sighted back in February of 2021 when he tried to board an airplane in Asheville with a 9mm loaded magazine on his carry-on luggage. So security confiscated the Glock handgun at that time, but allowed the congressman to board the plane. The observers said, here is Carthorne. We caught him leaving the airport actually in Charlotte. Woohoo! You fucking sidewinder!

Look at this. Living in America. Ladies and gentlemen, for those of you in the New York area, I'm going to be Look at this. Let it in America. Ladies and gentlemen, for those of you in the New York area, make plans to come see me at the live next week. On Friday, May 6th, I'm going back to one of my favorite haunts. Started doing this one in the early 90s, but it's changed ownership. My boy James owns it, Italian dude,

right out of the 1950s. Fucking diamond ring, this fucking, just a character. Love him and his wife. It's a family-owned joint. Friday, May 6th, I'll be on Long Island at Governor's Comedy Club. Then the next night, I'll be just north of the city at the Paramount Theater in Peekskill, New York, not far from my home back in the day. Also, it's Mother's Day, so black guys be very confused. What the fuck? Who said what? Cut it out. Also, it's Mother's Day weekend, and nothing says I love you, mom, like tickets to see Nick DiPaolo.

Nothing says, mom, check this greasy foul-mouthed prick out. Again, that's Friday at Governor's on Long Island and Saturday at the Paramount Theater in Peekskill. For tickets, go to nickdip.com and click on tour. Also, for those of you down this way, I'll be in Myrtle Beach, May 20 and 21, trying to pay for this bathroom. Wife just showed me a tub that like Marianne Twinnette's head was found in.

Whatever the fuck. It's got feet on it, shoes, pumps. Myrtle Beach, May 20th and May 21st at the Comedy Cabana. I did that about a year and a half ago. Loved it. Absolutely loved it. You can get those tickets also on my website at nickdip.com.

Click on the tour button. Aye. No, no, no, no! Oh, and our FLA segment tonight. A Florida mom was caught speeding at 91 miles per hour Tuesday with her toddlers unrestrained in the car, cops said, but I'm sure they're lying because she was a young black girl. Take it easy. I had to point out she was black because her name doesn't sound it. Caroline Puget. You know what I mean? 25 from Leesburg.

This is a mom. This is what passes as a mom in Leesburg, Virginia. She'll be 11 on Wednesday. Are you fucking kidding me? And she's got kids. She's got two. No, exactly.

And they're not twins. They didn't come out at the same time. So she got pregnant three years ago with the first one. Or whatever. I can't do math. I've never been pregnant. But for the love of God, she's a kid. Caroline Poitier, 25.

She 20. My ass. My ass, 25. She's 25 hours old, from Leesburg, was booked into the Volusia County Jail, that's not a good one, on charges of child neglect and possession of a controlled substance. She was released, hey, is there anybody in that country not a scumbag? Seriously. She was released fewer than 12 hours later after posting bond totaling five grand. According to a statement from the Volusia County Sheriff's Office,

Poitier was pulled over by deputies around 1230 a.m. That would be right after midnight. A.M. You know, you got the kids out showing them the museums. Anyways, this is why they busted her. She was doing 91 in a 50 on International Speed. Well, International Speedway Boulevard changed the name of the fucking thing. Jesus, why don't you just call it, hey, race in the land. In the land of the free.

In the home of the brave. Two children, ages two and three, Propecia and Aisha. No. No idea. Look it. This is how she had the kids when they pulled her over. She was doing 91. You buckled up, kids?

Eh, close enough. Look it. The one on the front, they got her head positioned so she'll be a projectile missile. You buckled up, kids? Eh, close enough. Here we go. Look it. The one in the front, they got her head positioned so she'll be a projectile missile. Kid in the back will survive because he's like a drunk guy when there's a crash. You know what I mean? And you know how I know that? My uncle Donnie, when he was in high school, in a car, three other guys died. This is back in the 40s they put the car in salem square

to show what happens you drink and drive he was passed out in the back he survived i think he was in a coma though actually for a month or something look at this this again i know white people do this too so i i don't want you to think i'm although I've never seen it happen. Anyways, two children ages two and three, Tyrone and Rosh Hashanah, were asleep without car seats in the front and back passenger seats. And I don't know. I'm no mom. I'm no father of the year, but come on. No, they're ignorant.

That's ignorant. I've got to agree. It's not a good thing. When deputies later pointed out to Poitier, listen to this. This is the one that set you up. That had she crashed, the cop said to her, at the speed she was traveling, she and the children likely would have been killed. The mom allegedly retorted.

Why can't, I mean, why does it say allegedly and then you put it in quotes? I don't know. Do you see? No, it's little things like that. and then you put it in quotes. No, it's little things like that. It's little things like that that shows you how deep political correctness runs

when it comes to black people. The person writing this, probably in their 20s or 30s, you can't say allegedly and then put it in quotes, you fuckstain. Mom allegedly retorted she didn't plan on getting

in. The cop said, if you guys crashed, she would have killed you and your kids. The mother says, I didn't plan on getting a crash. Because most people go, you know what? Today's the day. Yeah, yeah. No, tomorrow, Wednesday. I'm busy today. About four o'clock, can somebody run a red light at Thompson

and fucking Mapleville? Take me out. She didn't plan on it. Oh my, do you understand the ignorance of that? You stupid fucking blabbermouth cunt. That was a cop. Poitier told the deputies that she was driving from Leesburg to Daytona Beach and left the children's car seats in another vehicle at home

because she didn't want to strap them in while they were sleeping alright she's admitting to be a fucking they see that's why i don't have kids i would've done the same thing i'm like i don't wanna wake these little shits took me an hour to get them down with those martinis they go right back to sleep don't whisper what i said they go back to sleep just fine it's not even a big deal oh bullshit fucking scream the rest of the plane. Got two of them.

You do? Ever fly before? I've seen them asleep before they get on the plane. And then the mother wakes them to put them on the plane. And they're behind me for five hours, screaming like somebody's putting cigarettes out on their feet. Poitier was not wearing a seatbelt either. There she is showing off her ass,

which I got to tell you, that is a nectarine if I've ever seen one. But on the right, she looks like she maybe constricted AIDS. Constricted. Constricted. What am I, Archie Bunker? Anyway, she looks different, but that's quite an ass, I have to admit. Photos that were taken by the arresting deputy shows her ass here. No. And released by the sheriffing deputy, shows her ass here, no, and released by the sheriff's office, showed one of the children curled up in the front passenger seat, the other napping in the back like a drunk guy. Another adult later arrived on the scene,

the responsible, with car seats, and took Poitier's children home. A search of Poitier's car turned up pills that were later identified as a narcotic painkiller tramadol uh according to the sheriff's uh office so I don't know why is everyone so fucking stupid I don't know why aren't more people interrogating like me I don't know I kid you I kid you now. You'll come here. Talk to my face. That'll be funny to a 12.

I mean a 28. Anyways, finally tonight on Dogshit Alley. Green is the new black. Democratic legislators in Washington state that may be the dumbest. They might have eclipsed California as the dumbest state in the union eclipsed California as the dumbest state in the union because they have a jerk-off named Jay Inslee for governor who ran for president,

made an asshole of himself, is liberal. I call it West Coast dumb. It's a special brand of West Coast ignorance that I can't even, they caught up in this, they have been since the 50s when this new age psychology took over. You're in a child hippie fucking, they grasped that with two teeth and they haven't let it go. And I'm telling you, Democrat legislators in Washington state, they're prohibiting the use of the word marijuana. Now, what the fuck could be wrong? It's actually a pretty word, by the way. Marijuana. a pretty word, by the way. Marijuana. They're going to ban that use of the word in official law over concerns that, what else, folks? It's racist. You're fucking crazy. They really are.

The state legislator recently passed a bill banning the use of the term, and Democrat Governor Jerkoff J. Inslee has signed it into law effective in June. Once again, the Janine Garofalo glasses. I don't even like to say that because I like Janine. The term marijuana itself is a pejorative and racist. State Democrat Rep. Melanie Morgan, who I don't know what the fuck she is. Could be black. I'm guessing black.

But she wants Jennifer Aniston's hair. I'm confused. Melanie Morgan Aniston said during testimony about House Bill 1210, I say to you, Melanie, Shut your fucking mouth! Shut the fuck up, you cunt. What a mean show. As recreational marijuana use became more popular,

it was negatively associated with the Mexican immigrants. She continued, which I don't. No, no, no, no, no, no. Alcohol and Mexicans go together. I think weed. I think black dude. Well, why, no, no, no, no, no. Alcohol and Mexicans go together. I think weed. I think black, dude. Well, why is that, Nick? Because I've only met one black person in my life that didn't smoke weed, and it was Raz.

And I don't even know. My former producer, the great Raz. I don't even think he, I swear to God. When you think weed smoking, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. It's a fucking good buzz. I think jazz musician. I think Chappelle. I think the whole NBA.

They had to make rules for it. Not exactly a Mormon league, last time I checked. Do you see what I'm saying? She continued. Do you understand? This is all we have to do. Even though it seems simple because it's just one word, the reality is we're healing the wrongs that were committed against black and brown people around cannabis.

What? I've been watching, when I lived in New York, I was watching black people smoking weed before it was legal as I'm walking to the comedy cellar. I mean, 25 years ago. Not just black people, white people too, but I'm just saying. They're saying somehow it was, what are you talking about?

Oh, that's the other big myth. There's a bunch of black and brown people in jail because of weed. Yeah, if you busted them with 400 bales of it, maybe. What a fucking bunch of shit. That's what I think. I like a marriage, I wanna. I take big hits on my 30 joint.

I do. I want to eat those crunchies. I'll get them from you. That was allowed on TV. and it still should be. And we could laugh about it, and you could put shit up about Italian people and black people, and we could all howl about it. That's the idea of this country. It's the only way it would work.

You've got a country based on people, immigrants from all over the place. Why not become friends and bust each other's balls? Why? Because of the left. Why not become friends and bust each other's balls? Why? Because of the left. In her testimony, Morgan cited the first commissioner of the FBI of narcotics, which would go on to become the Drug Enforcement Agency, Harry Anslinger, who said that most marijuana users are Negroes, Hispanic, Caribbean, and entertainers. Their satanic music, jazz, and swing result from marijuana usage. And then he said this.

I'm telling you, it's the truth. When was that quote? 1958? It had to be. It has to be. She's filled with hate. And anybody else. Joy Reid is the most hateful you know what on the planet. She hates white people more than Al Sharpton ever could.

What a fucking. And MSC puts her out there every night. Knowing she's a fucking hardcore racist, but in the right way. Washington state has also spent the last several years funding a task force designed to help increase diversity in the cannabis industry, because that's so important. We got people, oh, you're going to get a diverse, and the whole South America, Central America, oh, boy. That's what they're worried about. Inflation through the roof. People can't even put food on the table for their kids.

That's what they're worried about in Seattle. Or in, fuck it, I should say, Washington State. The creation of the Washington Task Force on Social Equity, another fake religion, in cannabis, has resulted in measures, social equity in cannabis. Oh my God, I can't make this shit up. Resulted in measures such as the 2021 law signed by the governor that allows individuals applying for cannabis licenses who have prior convictions for marijuana-related offenses or reside in areas defined as disproportionately impacted. I don't even know what they mean by that. Impacted what? Well, they don't have fresh fruit and shut

the fuck up. To qualify for grant funding and expert advice as they attempt to break into the cannabis business. You want us to believe that black and brown people are having trouble breaking. Meanwhile, Snoop has got about 11 franchises. Mike Tyson, right? This country is finished. Turn off the lights. The party's over. They say that all good things must end. Call it a night.

The party's over. And tomorrow and next year starts the same old thing again. That's Monday Night Football when it was Monday Night Football. I'll show you who I think of when I hear stoner.

I don't think Mexican. I go black or I go this. All I hear is some tasty waves, cool buzz, and I'm fine. Jeff Spicoli, greatest character ever. That is it for today, ladies and gentlemen. Again, thank you. Please sign up monthly. I'm begging you at thecomicsgym.com and at patreon.com.

Watch the show all over the place. Go to my website, nickdip.com, and you can buy something if you click on the store button. And don't forget camu.com. If you'd like me to roast a friend or relative, I'll a little recording on the phone a minute minute and a half give a nice zing zangler it's it's a it's a good gift stocking stuffer in may anyways that's it you guys think and i'll say you're very welcome we'll see you back here for the final day i can't believe i'm saying it again of the week. Have a good rest of the day. guitar solo Outro Music