The Nick DiPaolo Show - Jill's Ex: Joe Stole My Wife | Nick DiPaolo Show #394

Episode Date: August 13, 2020

Suburban housewives will be voting for Trump. Trump challenges Biden to denounce Antifa. Mia Kalifa raises 100,000 for the Lebanese Red Cross. Thank you Jared F. from Essex, MD for your "Ask Nick!" question and for your continued support on Patreon! FREE! MONDAY - THURSDAY 5PM EST #Trump #MAGA #ABreathOfFreshAir

Hey guys, Nick DiPaolo here. As you know, my show exists because of viewer support. We need your support. And Patreon is a great way to support this show. If you become a Patreon member, you're a monthly subscriber, you will get an encore presentation story that nobody else gets. You will get to ask me a question during the show. You will have access to all the previous shows. a question during the show, you will have access to all the previous shows. You also could get a Nick DiPaolo mug or a signed CD, depending on what level you sign up at. Your support is really necessary. So subscribe today so you can hear your name mentioned on the show tomorrow when I read out people who have made donations.

It's more important now than ever. And I thank you for your time. And we'll see you down the road. guitar solo All righty. All righty. Oh, yeah. It's that time again. How you bitches doing out there? Thursday, last day of the week for me and Raz.

Well, not for Raz. He has to go home to a wife and kids. Fucking work's just beginning. Wait a minute. You have more than one? Two? Yeah. Three.

You got three? Yeah. What are the other two? Girls. Two girls? And how old are they? Four and one. Four and one. And raz juniors what eight god damn good for you what's that like it's what it's a mess it's a mess yeah yeah i uh i started to write a bit

yesterday about that i go you know i can't myself having, I see how much work it is. I see my sisters and what they went through and even my mother raising us. And I don't know how you raise a good kid today. I mean, how do you do that? And then I go to the mall and I look around and I go, oh, you're not doing that. 400 pound girl. She's 16 with purple hair. Nine fucking rings in her nose.

One representing each minute of quality time her parents spent with her. That's why she's dating fucking LeBron James cousin, fucking Ray Ray. That ought to fly, huh? How are you folks? Good to be with you again. I don't have the contributions from yesterday, so don't get excited. Tommy's away from his...

Raz, shut that. God, what was that, the computer? You didn't hear that? No. I just heard a pring, like a chime. No, you didn't hear that no i just heard a bring like a chime the is going on here anyways i don't have tommy didn't send the contributions he's away or whatever so i'll read those on monday so don't get excited we want to uh let's we want you to get some of this nick de paulo merchandise apparently tomm Tommy's turned me into fucking Ron Popeil here. Mike Lindell. Hiya, Mike Lindell. Get a mug made from the best ceramic in Africa between the Nile and two girls carrying baskets of wood on their head.

We wanted to see pictures of you with the Nick DiPaolo show gear on. Either become a patron at the Michael level or higher, or go to nickdip.com and pick up a hat or a mug or a shirt. Then send us a picture of you wearing or holding your show gear in a famous place or a funny scene or something like that. And if I like it, I'll put it on the show. You know, your wife or girlfriend going to bed in my T-shirt. The shit I dream of. Anyway, go

to nickdip.com and click on store to get hats, mugs, shirts, and more. Tommy's little girls are the ones packaging these things. He sent me a clip. It's the funniest goddamn thing. They're working like little Asian girls working for Nike

trying to pump out here jordan's 18 hour days no piss breaks he's yelling at him let's get to it huh let's get to my boy trump uh senator cory booker fucking moron from newark new jersey accused president of racism. What else? Hey, can we, have they put the pedal to the metal on this race card? Have you ever, 30 years ago, I thought it wouldn't get any worse. I've never seen anything like it.

How is the country, this country being held hostage by 13% of the population? By that, I mean black people. The rest of us being held hostage by 13% of the population. By that, I mean black people. The rest of us being held hostage. Anyways, he accused Trump of racism yesterday when Trump claimed suburban women would vote for him because he ended a low-income housing program and trolled the president with a jab at his spelling error. He spelled Corey with an E, so whatever. But he's upset about that.

But once again, Trump's just saying, being honest, right? You can't handle the truth. I love how he thinks this is racist, Cory Booker. Yet Obama had a plan based on disparate impact. I've told you what that is. That's when you look at the results of racial stuff, like you look at a neighborhood and it's 88% white,

they automatically imply that that's racist. And they had a plan to move low-income housing to white suburbs. How is that not racist? Black people can live in any white neighborhood they want. But it wasn't enough for Obama. But that's not racist. Honest to God, these people are the dumbest motherfuckers. Trump claimed in an early morning tweet, suburban housewives would vote for him because they didn't want low-income housing in their area.

Guess what? Neither do black people who live in nice neighborhoods. And warn them, rival Joe Biden would put Booker in charge of such programs. Can you imagine that? would put Booker in charge of such programs. Can you imagine that? Booker tweeted back at him, Donald, and he put an E in Donald just to bust his balls about the Sparrow. Your racism is showing. Your fucking ignorance is showing.

Unfucking real. They won't be happy till this country is a third world shithole. Nobody wants low-income housing. Black, white, Asian people move out of the city to get away from that shit. That's the fucking truth. God damn it. How many times can I say it?

You can't handle the truth. Trump's new attack line came the day after Biden named Kamala Harris as his female running mate. See how paranoid they are? Oh, that's why he's going after her. female running mate see how paranoid they are oh that's why he's going up there trump has appealed to the voting block through alleged fear-mongering this must be the washington but in racist language using the housing issue to make his point there's nothing racist about it you people are mentally fucking ill trump wrote back on obama rule called Affirmatively Furthering Fair Housing, intended to combat racial segregation. Oh, it's segregation when neighborhoods are mostly white?

In suburban housing last month. I lived in Westchester County, one of the richest fucking counties in New York. And we had black, there were plenty of black people on the main street. Right near me. They worked hard. Just like everybody else and they deserved it. They don't want Section 8 next to them. Fucking Jesus, I can't take it anymore.

Yeah, that's what Obama called it. Affirmatively furthering Fairhouse. Intended to combat racial segregation in suburban housing last month and claims that his decision will keep low-income housing out of such areas. Biden campaign said he would reinstate the rule. Oh, is that right? Is that what you're going to do? Reinstate the fucking rule. Go ahead. Oh, fucking idiot.

Trump's language has been interpreted by who? As implying he would keep minorities out of the suburb. No, that's how you're interpreting it. Fucking. While his use of suburban housewife is seen as a reference to white women. No, he would have said Karen. He would have said Karen's. You would have been all right with that.

Which is racist, by the way. Booker is one of only two Democrat black senators and has no known role in future Biden plans. Yeah, because he's a fucking moron. The last time Trump tweeted in similar terms, Elizabeth Warren called it disgusting racism. And who would know more about disgusting racism than a lady who lied about her ethnicity to get into Harvard. Fucking sitting bull. Titless wonder. Running eagle. Screaming douche. You know there's a...

Donald Trump's presidency is melting down after his failed... Listen to this. We knew this was coming. After his failed device of erratic leadership has cost over 160,000 American lives. They're blaming him for COVID. That's how you know they got nothing.

Tens of millions of jobs. Can you imagine? This is like an insult to people. And if you people fall for it, you deserve the country you get. Loss of 10 million jobs because of the fucking COVID. Don't mention he had the best economy in the history of this country before this shit started.

But you know what? There's such ignorant people who vote Democrat that'll buy this shit. They want to believe it. And he left the United States the hardest hit country in the world by COVID. Fuck your mother! How about that? Wouldn't you love to see Hannity say that? Fuck your mother! How about that? Wouldn't you love to see Hannity say that? Fuck your mother!

Breaking news tonight. I'm really pissed off. Fuck your mother! Trump, next story, calls on Biden to denounce Antifa. I like Antifa. I used to do Antifa, but I like to put the accent on it. President Trump on Wednesday called on Joe Biden to not denounce radical far left group Antifa after pranksters appeared to direct Antifa.com to Joe Biden's campaign page.

Rich Wood sent me a, he said, go, he said, put in, put in Antifa.com in your browser and click it. And I did. And it's supposed to take you to Biden's. It didn't. It just said error. I guess they caught it. But he sent me a screenshot later, which I forgot to give you. It took to Biden's.

Finally, somebody on the right is hacking into shit. The president was asked about the snafu, which seemed to time with Biden's unveiling of Kamala Harris in Delaware. Whether or not his opponents need to denounce him. He did this in a press conference

yesterday. Please, go ahead. Thank you, Mr. President. I'd like to highlight a kind of odd situation. In the last hour or so, if you Googled Antifa.com, it would take you straight to Joe Biden's website, his official campaign website. Odd situation. We don't know who's behind that. But it raises an interesting leadership question. Hello. that. But it raises an interesting leadership question. Hello. Joe Biden, the Democrat Party,

Kamala Harris, should they publicly denounce the Antifa as a as a domestic terrorist organization? They should. I think they're afraid to. It's in my book, it's virtually a part of their campaign. Antifa, the Democrats act like, gee, I don't know exactly what that is. Take a look at Portland. Take a look at any place you want to take a look at. They're all over the place. They were here. You are correct, sir. She didn't even phrase the question right. She said, should Joe Biden denounce Antifa as a terrorist organization? In other words, that means saying, no, they're not a terrorist. She's new. I can tell. She's a little nervous.

She meant to say, should they label them? You know, you don't denounce them as a terrorist group. That means you'd say, yeah, they're not terrorists. Anyways, just a minor. Of course, Trump didn't even pick up on it. He's like, yeah, fuck Joe Biden. How much do you want to make Biden the last one to know that his campaign page was hacked into. He's sitting over there playing with a fucking little, you know, Hot Wheels car and a fucking diaper.

Where are we? What are we doing? The radical so-called anti-fascist organization has been linked to civil rights protests across the country, with the Justice department finding evidence that antifa made an organized effort to exacerbate the violence attorney general william barr i call elton john said he had evidence that the group hijacked demonstrations over the death of floyd at the hands of white police in may they still have to put that in there to further their own goals. Well, if you got that evidence, let's bring it out and hang these motherfuckers. But Jerry Nadler in New York, remember this a month ago

or so that somebody asked him about Antifa-led violence and he said this. It is true. There's violence across the whole country. Do you disavow the violence from Antifa? I'm dizzy. That's happening in Portland right now? That's a myth that's being spread only in Washington, D.C. About Antifa in Portland?

Yes. Let's get out of here. You're lying and everybody can see it. Please, okay? Get this through your head, you. Get this through your head, you Jew motherfucker, you. That guy is going to be dead. I'm telling you.

You heard me say it. I've been saying it for about two months now. That guy is going to be dead. I'm telling you, you heard me say it. I've been saying it for about two months now. That guy is very unhealthy. He, you see him leaning against the wall. It's like 72 degrees and dry out. He's like, that's a myth.

I can't breathe. Yeah. Because you got your belt about an inch above your nipples. You fucking dummy. Get this through your head. You Jew motherfucker. You fucking dummy. Get this through your head, you Jew motherfucker, you. That sounds like me fighting with my agent in 1996. Anyways, yeah. So let's see you do that, Joe. Come out and nobody has on the left. Do you hear anybody poo-pooing the violence and shit?

They don't even show it anymore. Remember Sunday night in Chicago? They don't even cover it on CNN, MSNBC. It is such a corrupt. They are the cancer in this country. The media. Worse than the politicians. They are a cancer.

And these young people that are in the press conferences have no idea that they're supposed to be objective. They really think they're supposed to cheerlead or hate one side or the other. It's fucking fascinating. Trump, more Trump news. President Trump wants to replace Mark Esper after the November election because of his defense secretary's hesitation to deploy active U.S. military to quell violent protests. Yeah, good. You're fired. You're fired.

You're fired. You're fired. Remember we've been asking where the hell is the National Guard? Remember Trump kept threatening and we kept going, where are they? He keeps talking about it. And here's the Mama Luke that was in the way, apparently. You'll find out once he's gone, that he was probably a Trump hater.

You got to vet these people. Like you do fucking, uh, people from Iran trying to get into the country. This it's unbelievable how many people on, supposedly on Trump's side, a fucking like undercover rumors of Esper's. Uh,

he was named secretary, uh, in July, 2019, and has told people close to him that he plans to leave regardless of the outcome of November's presidential election. I wonder why that is, huh? I suck cock. Exactly. And I love it. Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy. Rumors of Esper's potential ouster have circulated for months as the commander in chief and his fourth defense secretary disagreed on everything from the Confederate flag being displayed on military bases. So this guy was probably, you know, for taking them down, I'm guessing, to the use of military to quell violence in U.S. cities. Another yuppie. The president confronted Esper in the bathroom.

He sucker punched him as he was heading into stall number two and then sat on his face. Listen, you, I'll drop a shit right down your throat. President confronted Esper during an Oval Office meeting on June 3rd, just hours after the defense chief said during a press conference that he did not support Trump's idea of using the Insurrection Act to deploy active duty military troops to cities experienced unrest after the death of Floyd. Really? And why did you do?

What was the problem there? Huh? Remember we talked about Joe Pollack about this? I said, why isn't he sending in the feds? Is it unconstitutional? Remember the guy from Breitbart? He goes, no, George Washington did it during the Whiskey Rebellion.

Don't you wish you were there for the Whiskey Rebellion? Fuck. Fuck, it just sounds like a great fight. Bunch of fucked up white guys with whiskey on their brains shooting at each other. It's like a Tuesday night here in Georgia. Trump reportedly consulted advisors on firing Esper,

but for now he has shelved the plan. According to Bloomberg News, Trump is also frustrated that Esper has not done more to publicly defend him on key issues, including reports that Russia offered the Taliban bounties to kill U.S. soldiers. And I'll tell you another thing. Frankly, you're beginning to smell.

Yeah, that story went away in a day, remember? During the June 3rd briefing, Esper also told reporters he regretted joining the president and other senior administration officials for a photo op outside St. John's Church near the White House after troops cleared some demonstrators. I don't like this guy. I'm going to fucking smash his fucking face in.

Well, he's going. He'll probably write a book like everybody else once he's secretary of what? Putting his secretary of hesitation. Hesitation. Oh, boy.

We got a lot of potential October surprises coming up. You got the William Barr slash Durham report about fucking Russiagate. And apparently, evidence is overwhelming. And again, I asked my cop buddy who's a lawyer, I go, is anybody going to go to jail? He goes, what are you, fucking kidding me?

Of course not. These corporations flood these politicians with fucking money. You know, the Nikes of the world. Somebody has to go to goddamn jail. I would love it to be our first black president. That would be so hilarious. And then all the white people go, look it, they're all alike.

Criminal. We give them a fucking job. Nick's just kidding. Relax, folks. He's half white, so that's, he's biracial. Fucking makes Nixon look like a puss. Let me just say this about this Marxist cocksucker. Well, the American people have to know if their president's a crook. Well, I'm not a crook. Oh, I never did anything wrong and I promise never to do it again. Ever hear the tapes of Nixon? Oh my God. He recorded everything he did. He did. Phone conversations. Well, I got a couple of Jews down there that are raising hell. He goes to the blacks. God bless the blacks. But they got about 500 years before they're going to

touch up to us. He goes, I love them, but go. It's like Archie Bunker in the Oval Office. Jesus! Shut the door. I'm trying to get blown over here. But here's a potential October surprise. Jill Biden's ex. Remember I said she's pretty even though

she's old? she's a fucking piece of ass in her day look at the little blonster and look at shithead joe biden posing like he's in a scotch ad with a shitty turtleneck and fucking elvis sideburns while he's balding on top look at that dink anyway jill biden's ex-husband exposesoses Joe's adulterous affair lies in campaign bribery. That's the ex-husband right there. His name is Bill Stevenson. He completed an autobiographical book manuscript to be published before november's election i don't think look at calling out a politician who had an affair is like saying uh you know his cockroaches at mcdonald's in

downtown detroit nobody's fucking not gonna make anybody blink anyways he's completed a book manuscript to be published before november's election in which he devotes 80 pages to new bombshell details about joe and jill biden the book claims that joe and jill began their romance in delaware earlier than they have publicly stated while jill was still married to stevenson and that their affair led to stevenson's uh to break up his marriage to jill and he's pissed about it hey she was a wh a hooah. Chapter one. B, she was a hooah. Chapter two. Chapter three. A, she was a hooah.

B, she was a hooah. This is the audio version of the book. A, she was a hooah. B, she was a hooah. The end. The affair between Biden and my ex-wife Jill started in 1974 when we were still married, not in 1975, as the Biden official story claims.

Stevenson noted that both he and Jill knew Joe Biden even earlier than that, having helped him with his 72 Senate campaign. Bill Stevenson donated money to Biden in the 1970 campaign. A millionaire businessman, Stevenson, who donated car defibrillators to the NYPD. Stevenson now wants to get the truth out about Biden's stunning past misdeeds. I don't know if they're that stunning. Bill Stevenson also blows the whistle. Listen to this.

Biden's just a dirty, dirty man. Blows the whistle on a bribery scheme in which Joe's brother Frank took $3,000 from Stevenson ahead of Biden's first Senate race to hand to the boss of the Teamsters Union to ensure that copies of the Wilmington News Journal, which endorsed Biden's Republican incumbent opponent, Caleb Boggs, were delivered three days late after the polls had already

closed. Shortly after the election, Biden's first wife, Neely, had died in a car crash. Joe Biden had claimed as recently as 2007 that the truck driver in the crash drank his lunch. But the late driver, courtesy Dunn's daughter, disputed that her father was drunk and successfully asked Biden to apologize to her personally for the false claim. This guy's just a scumbag. You're a crumb creep. Joe Biden has a close friendship with John Cochran. Here's some more dirt. The former CEO of the Wilmington, Delaware-based credit card company, MBNA, we all know that,

which was absorbed by Bank of America in 2006. Cochran purchased Biden's Wilmington area house from Biden in 1966, I mean 1996, for $1.2 million. Cochran now chairs the University of Delaware Board of Trustees. Are you getting where this is going? Where he is fighting to keep Biden's records stored at the university from coming out in the public as concerned parties tried to find information in the records pertaining to Tara Reid, the woman who has accused Biden of sexual assault. Remember the library at Delaware University? They couldn't get the records out. We want to find out

this guy is a fucking asshole buddy of Joe Biden's. It's what a swamp. He's just like a parody of a politician. He's perfect for the Democrats. Just perfect. He's really underlying racist. Fucking bribes. He's a politician. But the problem is, and people go both, you know, left and right. They're all dirty.

Yeah, but the left pretends they're morally superior. The Republicans don't go around saying, you know, he's dirty, do this, do that. Fucking racist, racist, racist. We don't judge people. That's what the left does. I mean, they're all filthy, but don't fucking pretend you're not. Stevenson and Jill were divorced in May 75, and Joe and Jill married in June 1977 at the United Nations Chapel. But now Stevenson is calling that story a fabrication. Multiple inside political sources

in Delaware who were active during the 70s told National File that Joe Biden began his affair with Jill as early as 74 when she was still known as Jill Stevenson, confirming Bill Stevenson's version of events. The illicit lovers would often rendezvous at a limestone road Route 7 gas station. Sexy. Fucking classy, Joe. Stay classy. Yeah, I'll meet you behind pump number seven. Okay?

Give me some head behind the fucking Coke machine. They met there. It's called Midway Golf, according to former Midway employees. So they actually saw those people there. Can I get two hot dogs and a Sprite to go play?

Bill Stevenson, who owned the Stone Balloon Tavern in Concert Hall, bought his wife Jill a brown Corvette as a gift. Listen to this in 1974. An accident occurred, this is in 74, when Joe Biden, who was driving the Corvette, Oh my God, he's like Ronald Goldman driving OJ's car. That'll piss any guy off. Biden, who was driving the Corvette with Jill inside, backed into another motorist vehicle.

Just a fucking dope. Joe Biden initially promised to cover the cost of the accident, but Bill Stevenson ended up paying the $650 bill. It's just, and he's out there fucking moralizing, preaching to us how racist we are. And oh, my God, I know they're all fucking hypocrites. But Jesus H. Christ, Eloise. When Stevenson confronted wife Jill about being in the car with Biden, Jill's answer was not satisfactory to Stevenson. Stevenson said, I didn't fuck him. We did everything else.

No. It's like the Sopranos. They found cum on the visor. It was the story of rumor about Tony fucking Christopher's girlfriend. Stevenson said that he could not live with Jill anymore, so he asked her to leave the house, and they later divorced. Stevenson felt the betrayal by Joe Biden was even worse than the betrayal by his wife considering stevenson's close friendship with biden and his financial contributions to the upstart politician in the divorce jill tried to

get half of stevenson assets but the judge ruled in favor of uh stevenson That doesn't happen often. This is juicy, isn't it? But again, even if this comes out whenever before the election, it's going to be overpowered by the Russiagate shit. I got to believe. Shortly thereafter, Joe Biden's brother, Frank Biden, approached Stevenson and suggested that uh that he get out of town because he was now a liability to joe biden's political so what he's threatening him now no wonder why his son's such a scumbag he has all joe's traits bill stevenson's book will undoubtedly make major waves during the 2020 presidential election.

Don't count on it. National file will continue reporting details regarding Biden's history in the state of Delaware. That's interesting, huh? I hope those files come out about Tara Reid. Whatever. Like I said, that shit doesn't go that far in dc or anywhere else i mean guys are pigs hey uh the nick dipolo show we have a new sponsor ladies and gentlemen brought to you by gabby insurance g-a-b-i right now we're all looking for ways to save money when's the last

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That's G-A-B-I dot com slash NickDip. Gabby.com slash NickDip and save a lot of money. Thank you for sponsoring the show today, Gabby. Good to have you aboard. Yes, sir. I have a Patreon question. You've got a Patreon question up in this motherfucker. Jared F. Essex, Maryland.

Hello, Mr. DiPaolo. I've been a fan of your stand-up since I was a teen, and I love your show. What will be the funniest campaign slogan for Biden that he could use unironically, unaware of how stupid it makes him look. I don't know. What am I going to come up with this right now?

Come on, Jared. Fucking finally do a show here. P.S. Rath, stop waiting on Nick and run the damn clips. In Biden's voice. Get your shit together, man. What do you want, cocaine? Oh, he's doing.

Very good, Jared. I don't know. Ironically, he... What could he say? Something like... I'll get this country to where it's going. That's funny because he has no idea where he is. Something like that.

Let me lead you into the closet. I don't know. I can't think of it. Unironically, unaware how stupid it makes him look. I think they should play Jimi Hendrix. Hey, Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand? Saw my woman with another man. I shot him down.

How about that? I don't't know that was a good question it was almost like an sat question for me i can't think before 4 p.m uh you guys know how sad i am about college football originally there were 898 games on the schedule. It's down to 393 now. You can't have it. How are you going to have a college football season without the Big Ten or the Pac-12? You know what I mean? You're going to watch what? Fordham versus Monmouth?

I am fucking, you don't understand, it's bothering the shit out of me. I'm going to have to be productive this fall. Anyways, football fans in desperate need of a laugh after the Big Ten postponed the fall season might want to check out Annie Agar's latest video. I don't even know who this broad is. The West Michigan broadcaster, and that's who she is, from Rockford, is once again cracking up social media.

Well, I'll be the judge of that. Agar, whose spoof video of a Zoom meeting with Big Ten fans went viral in May, produced another hit Tuesday after the Big Ten and the Pac-12 announced it was going to punt on a fall season with the hopes of playing a full season. So that's... That's faggot stuff. I agree. You want to call it by its name? That's faggot stuff. I agree. You want a call by its name, that's strictly for fags. You're goddamn right.

Even the president said yesterday, let them play football. And he's so right. He goes, he goes, they're in no danger. They're in the great shape. And it's true.

It's fucking true. They're 18 to 22 years old in peak physical conditioning. For the love of Pete, we are such a soft nation. And I'm going to say it again. You know why? This nation has been continually feminized for the last 30 years. Overcautious.

We have the mindset of a fucking 80-year-old woman. Nick, that's sexist. Kiss my grits. So that's when Agar decided everyone needed a laugh. She portrays representatives from the NCAA as well as the Power Five conferences in the 49-second TikTok video. The conferences banter back and forth

with the NCAA official and each other with a Big Ten rep going into full-blown meltdown. Let's see if it's funny. I didn't really get it. Okay, thank you all for coming. I know we have a lot to get through, so let's hear from the Big Ten first. Let's just stare at her. It's funny. I don't give a shit what comes out. You know why she's

doing this? Because she's good looking. Got nothing to do with being funny in football. It's got nothing to do with it. Every chick who's above a six wants to be on Instagram. He'll do anything to go viral. She's not doing anything rude. I can see she has a nice chest.

What? The fuck? Who are you, Joe Biden? You're a crumb creep. Why? Because I like some nice rack? Okay, go ahead, sugar pie. All I think we can really do right now is just keep a brave face and go out there. It's over. It's over. We are screwed. We are screwed. Oh, great. You handled that well.

We are? Oh, I knew it. It's over? Oh, yeah. This was a great idea. It's going really well. Oh, guys, this is really bad. I don't know what to do. What do I tell Trevor Lawrence? Just tell him the world is really bad. I don't know what to do The world is ending do I feel hot I feel hot to you. There's the protocol. What do we do? What's the procedure? We will drive up to you and we will show you what we do now Yeah, I feel like you need to get a grip on all this Everybody just calm down Yeah, I feel like this may have been my fault.

Get out. Yeah, okay. Just kidding. Did anybody find that remotely funny? If she was ugly, I'd drive to her house and slap her across the face. What the fuck? I don't get it. Trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. Raz, did you find that funny whatsoever?

If she was ugly, she would have been a better actor. That's a great fucking point. That is a good point. I mean, look at some of the great Christopher Walken. Edward James almost pineapple face. James Woods. These are some ugly motherfuckers. Danny Partridge.

I mean, Danny Bonaduce. You want to see the worst acting ever? Cindy Crawford was in a movie, I think with Alec Baldwin called Fair Game. You want to see why she never acted again? Oh, my aching stem. She would have got booed out of an acting class. This was actually in theaters. Oh, my God. Makes Keanu Reeves look like Brando. Just. Ugh. Nice try, Miss Agar. Maybe you you're funny I think you're a little off on that one you know it's not one guy who's a fan of college football belly laughing at that shit now here's another woman trying to do good and and

surprising to me Raz knew who this porn star was. Don't mean to get him in trouble with the wife, but Raz is like, oh yeah, man. I follow her constantly. I must be behind the times. Oh, she's a former porn star. Once a porn star. Sorry, if you're on tape, take it in the ass and the mouth. It's no former.

You can't go back from that. What am I supposed to believe? You're just giving your husband, you're tickling his nuts now? Please, you're a dirty hoe. And we love you for it. Thank God for sex molestation. Former porn star Mia Khalifa, again, Raz knows this, is auctioning off her infamous glasses to help victims of the catastrophic blast in Beirut, saying she's trying to make a positive difference as her native Lebanon continues to recover one week later.

I was wondering what the connection was with this girl. She's trying to do some good. Again, another hot chick. One star. Wonder what happened to her as a kid. And I said it to Raz. You know what happened? She was born with those tits.

That's like a, seriously, if you're a good looking chick, she probably had those when she was 13. You know what happened? She was born with those tits. That's like a, seriously, if you're a good looking chick, she probably had those when she was 13. You know what that does? It ends up being a cross to bear. She probably dating guys in their late 20s when she's 14. You know what I mean? Then they get into meeting guys who own strip clubs and drugs and shit. All because of her titties. You don't see Liz Warren in all kinds of hot water.

Scarecrow bitch. She sat home on Friday nights diddling her fucking clam. Thank Christ. The top bit for Khalifa's iconic black glasses. Why are they so iconic? Had reached $100,000. There's a lot of horny guys out there.

It's her glasses. It's not her IUD. The fuck? Really? there's a lot of horny guys out there it's her glasses it's not her iud the fuck really gonna pay a hundred grand you could go to fucking vision center at the mall and pick up 12 probably what she did hundred thousand dollars as a midday tuesday some four days after the porn star posted a link to her ebay listing on Instagram and asked those who are not interested in her personal items to donate to the Lebanese Red Cross instead. Yeah, I'll do that right away. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole. Khalifa in her glasses.

The demand for Khalifa is, oh, I came up with a great name. Want to hear this? This was right after the OJ debacle in the 90 oh, I came up with a great name. You want to hear this? This was right after the OJ debacle in the 90s. I came up with the best name ever for a fucking, like, alternative band. Nicole's Sunglasses. Nicole's Sunglasses. That would even work today still. Isn't that great? And I told you my other one for a heavy metal band. Crib death. Fucking genius. Listen to this. Demand for Khalifa specs propel bids to reach 11,400 in just six hours.

How about if I put these on eBay? We'll see what we get. Khalifa posted a new image Monday highlighting the glasses, which have generated 190 bids. I got to see her work. The auction is set to end Sunday afternoon, according to the list. The novelty glasses are the best prop, Khalifa wrote. I will sign them. How do you sign glasses, chooch?

If you want and take one last Polaroid wearing them before sending them off to their new home. At least she's doing something. She actually sounds intelligent. The glasses are used and abused, just like me. The listing states, adding that Khalifa plans to live stream the final hours of the auction on a platform yet to be announced. How about NickDip.com? What do you say, Khalifs? All the proceeds from Khalif's auction will go to Raz's hair plugs. What? What the fuck?

The country's most valued, no, all the proceeds will go to the Lebanese Reed Cross. Reed Cross? the country's most valid no all the proceeds will go to uh the lebanese reed reed cross reed cross red cross the country's most valuable asset at this time of crisis she's got a conscience even after all that cock she's uh socially aware lebanon's health minister said monday that the country's whole government has resigned in the wake of the explosion. How do we get that over here? How do we get every shithead that's in Congress right now and Senate and except for Trump?

How do we, it's going to take an explosion. Wouldn't that be great? They all resigned. She puts in, and that's true. And by the way, I didn't make that up if that's a fact tell me

am i lying parliament this is her talking the porn star parliament is next the former adult entertainer wrote by choice or by force either way lebanon has had enough while simultaneously having nothing. Pretty eloquent for a girl who made $1,100 a week peeing on a guy named Dave. Hey, Ron Jeremy, who I had on my radio show when I was in New York and who I met when I hosted the Strippers National Awards in Vegas. He's in trouble. He's got like 20 girls accusing him of rape. I'm not saying, allegedly, you know, but I got to take that poster of him down.

You know, we always see cops taking a beating this year. They get no, like I said, being a cop is like being an offensive lineman in the NFL. You never hear your name called until you fuck up. I think it's a great analogy. Anyways, here's a female cop saving a guy's life. Hero cop saves a man in wheelchair from oncoming train. Danger, Will Robinson. Danger.

No, Will Robinson. Danger. According to the Lodi Police Department, Officer Erica Uria was near Lodi Avenue just before 8.45 a.m. yesterday when she saw a man in a wheelchair stuck on a set of railroad tracks. I got to believe he's trying to kill himself. He's probably pissed at her. You're going over railroad tracks in gotta believe he's trying to kill himself he's probably pissed at her uh you're going over railroad tracks in a wheelchair it's a coincidence you can't hear that train coming huh guy probably i'm just guessing i

could be wrong what a time to have a blowout in your wheelchair while the man tried to free his chair the railroad cross arm started to come down with a train headed. Look at this video. Intense video. Can you get up? Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up. Are you shitting me?

Are you shitting me? Are you shitting me? The moral of that story is crippled lives do matter. Unbelievable. That should be all over the news no that wouldn't go with the narrative of the mainstream media that all cops are fucking racist and the whole myth that they've been spewing out for the last 20 years congratulations erica she's gonna get she has to get some medal of accommodation i want to speak to the guy in the wheelchair, though. This is just me. I know I'm very cynical,

but come on. He probably was doing that intentionally. He's sick of being in that fucking chair. All those better ways to go, you know? You know what I mean? Go to fucking, what's her name, Khalifa?

Go to her house. Let her suffocate you with her ass. Here's a good one. Anyways, ladies and gentlemen, this episode is sponsored by our friends at Immunologic. If you're like me, you know how

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Free shipping for free shitting. Come on, folks. That's immunologic.com and we thank them for sponsoring the show today. Another example, in my opinion, I'm going to show you a clip right now. Big headlines. Body cam video shows Utah cops order dog to attack black man on knees.

That's the headline. Now you tell me what's wrong, okay? Newly released police body cam video shows a cops in Salt Lake City order a police dog to maul a black man in his own backyard. The disturbing footage obtained by the Salt Lake City Tribune shows Jeffrey Ryan's 36 approached by police officers while he's smoking in his yard before heading off to his job as a train engineer. Have to throw that in to let you know it's not a street scale. But here's the video. And you tell me if he's following police orders again. You tell me. Get on the ground.

Get on the ground or you're going to get bit. Get on the ground. Get on the ground. On the ground. Pause. Pause. Get on the ground. Get on the ground all the way down. He's still on one knee.

You get it? All the way down. Still on one knee. That's the dogs. Go ahead. I'm on the ground. I'm on the ground. Why are you biting me? No, you're not on the ground. I'm on the ground. Stop.

Still not on the ground. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on see it on his face. Why? Because you didn't do what the cops asked you to do. Remember, the cops at Rez is not agreeing. I can see it on his face. He's giving me that. All the way on the fucking ground means on your stomach.

Not like this. They don't know if you have a weapon or if you're going to run. Okay? They're going into a fucking alley at night. They want, I swear to God a lot of these black guys want this shit to go viral. They want to be part of the story. And it did, naturally. In every fucking

headline, just knee-jerk political correct reaction. They sick to dog on them when they shouldn't have. Get on the fucking ground. That's what happens when you don't grow up with a dad in the house. Again, I'm assuming that. Oh, Nick, that's racist. Well, nine out of ten times I'm right.

When my father told me to do something like get on the ground and I got to one knee, I'd be on the ground, fucking unconscious. Oh, Nick, you're saying that's good parenting? No, but it fucking... I sure listened to the cops after that when I got older. See my point? Get on the fucking ground, not one knee. The officers then handcuff Ryan while he's on the ground, face down, and a bunch of libs just sitting home going, there it is again, you're attacking a black man.

Police said they responded to the home because Ryan's wife had filed a protective order in December. And court records show he was hit with a domestic violence charge around that time. But of course, there's no details on it. But Ryan is planning to file a lawsuit against the Salt Lake City Police Department, filing a notice of claim, which is the first step in suing. Right. I did the best I could. What about me? What am I supposed to do?

Supposed to get on your stomach. His lawyers claim Ryan suffered nerve intended damage from the attack and contracted an infection that may still require his leg to be amputated. You fucking lying motherfuckers. Sure he did. Let's follow this story. The claim the officers who are white order the attack because Ryan is black. That's what they're claiming. The fucking lawyers.

You need to shut the fuck up. Yeah. Play that race card right to the end. It's the answer for everything. Here's what the lawyer says, talking to the people from the newspaper. What's the difference between the two of us? He's talking to a white journalist. That could make this happen to him, but I couldn't imagine happening to me.

What's the difference? You listen when somebody tells you to do something. A cop. That's the difference. His attorney, Gabriel White, of White of course Gabriel White who is white told the newspaper no one's ever shown up at my house he said yes because you didn't give him reason to have you had a fucking a warrant out or a fucking restraining order put on you by your wife or girlfriend no so let's ignore those facts. Jesus fucking Christ. I understand because he's

a lawyer. He'll say anything to win the case, but this is the mindset of America. What's the difference? We, that would never happen. No, because we behave ourselves. Wouldn't you love it if the news is reported like this every night? Guy having a conniption like me. I go home and I have fucking chest pains after the show. I've had 10 people in my life, Joe List was the last one, to say, I'm worried you're going to have a heart attack. And I say, I'm worried you guys are going to have a heart attack because you don't let it out. You sit on it.

And then one day you're on the treadmill and your fucking aorta explodes. Here's a girl I'd love to date. I'd love to bang her. I like her politics. I think she's very sexy. Look at her. It's like, you know, that looks like a buffalo giving birth. birth fucking Rosanna Rosanna Dana it looks like a woman's face like a buffalo's taking a shit or a horse and that's what he's shitting out an ugly angry woman Kansas Black Lives Matter leader borrows beliefs directly from Vladimir Lenin, wants to move and go to Cuba. Well, what the fuck's stopping you, pig face? All right, get up! Get up!

several unlawful Black Lives Matter protests in Wichita under the banner of her organization, Project Justice ICT, endorses the claim that communist revolutionary Vladimir Lenin called for the abolition of police and expressed a desire to move to Cuba due to its free health care. That's what she fucking said. So she's a big fan of of Lenin. Who said that? Who the fuck said that? Gabrielle Griffey.

Who's the slimy little communist shit twinkle-toed cocksucker down here who just signed his own death warrant? As those... So she says Lennon called for the abolition of police. You know what else he did? He killed 100 million of his own fucking citizens. You fucking dummy. See all that black shit coming out of her head?

That's just like fucking, I don't know. Somebody come up with something. That's just fucking black smoke. I don't know. I should have left that at the fucking buffalo ass as those calling for defunding the police mourn a devastating defeat in central kansas with the largest city in kansas refusing to defund the police and instead appropriating an additional six million to the witch empire to police good for you they said fuck you we're gonna give them an extra six mil uh and the 2021-22 budget a series

of controversial tweets have emerged from this pig face the leader of several protests throughout the city do we do we have any of the tweets or us please say yes all right griffey who has been arrested twice on both august 3rd and 6th after police say project justice ict hosted unlawful protests that saw protesters block streets and allegedly menace drivers she retweeted a user claim lenin called for the abolition of police in the military in a post retweeted by griffey a user wrote lenin outright fucking says abolish the police this is who they want who they're following and another tweet griffey quoted another user these aren't even her own thoughts who wrote that they were thinking about how to

listen to this another user was sitting home thinking this, thinking about how gender reaffirming surgery is considered a life saving surgery in Cuba and that it's free for anyone who fucking needs it. Fucking quiz. Then go to Cuba. Don't let the door hit you in your black, hairy, crack ass. What's stopping you, you pig? Get the fuck out of my country tonight. After one arrest on August 3rd, Griffey claimed that Wichita police and city government chose intimidation over her health and safety by arresting her and said the conditions of the

jail would be responsible should she contract COVID-19. Nobody would give a shit. You fat, nasty, black bitch. You don't want to get COVID-19 in a jail? Don't get arrested. Here you go. There's some logic. Lennon said that. Lennon said, if you want to get boned in the ass, stay out of jail. I think that was his quote. Wait, that was my high school yearbook quote. I'm sorry. As the Wichita City Council heard from both those in favor of police and those calling for the complete defunding and abolition of police, many affiliated with Griffey and Project Justice, ICT, around 500 hashtag back the blue protesters. So these are the good people. Back the blue protesters. So these are the good people. About 500 back the blue protesters gathered nearby to show support for the police and send the show of force to the city government.

At one point, as Black Lives Matter protesters attempted to disrupt the event, the large crowd of police supporters did this, started singing. Listen to that white rhythm. Beautiful voice. I love it. Wake up, white people. Anyways, that is it, ladies and gentlemen, for the week. Good to see somebody backing the blue. Don't get too nervous because we've showed what? About three clips in the last couple of weeks of Antifa when they were confronted physically

and they just withered away like the little rich entitled white bitches that they is. So don't get too nervous. But when you should get nervous is when people like Biden and fucking Kamala Harris and the whole Democrat party, don't come out and denounce this shit. That's when you should get a little nervous. And another reason you better hope Trump wins. Great week.

Thank you guys so much for watching a cameo.com. If you want me to roast one of your friends, I'll make a video on my phone. You go to cameo.com. Tell me a little bit about them and they'll work up some magic. I could be nice or I can say, you know, happy birthday, you old pig. Anything you'd like. That is it. You guys think and I will say it. You're very welcome. See you back here on Monday. Have a good weekend. guitar solo guitar solo We'll see you next time.