The Nick DiPaolo Show - Joe Rogan For Trump | Nick Di Paolo Show #1461

Episode Date: September 27, 2023

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about Ron Vs. Gavin, Joe for Trump and more! Support our sponsor, DoorDash! Support the show and get 50% off your 1st DoorDash order up to a ...$20 value. Just download the DoorDash app and use code NICKDIP Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

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Starting point is 00:00:00 🎵 Are you interested in the real story? That's why I'm here, bitch. How are you? Welcome to the show. What is it, Wednesday? It is. It is Wednesday. Now, Dallas, am I right that that's me playing with my, can you hear that?
Starting point is 00:00:50 Any static? Oh, that must be my headphones. Hey, the decision was made to show the Norton interview tomorrow, right? Thursday. Which is tomorrow. Yes, so tune in tomorrow. The fucking hilariously funny Jimmy Norton, old friend of mine, just as funny on stage as off and vice versa, just a guy who was born to be a comic and a hard worker
Starting point is 00:01:14 and has been very successful. And you guys know him, either from the Louis show with me or Tough Crowd or his many specials. Anyways, that's tomorrow for you people who are... Get the whole thing. What? Anyhow, today's Wednesday. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:01:32 What did I do yesterday? What did you do? Anything? More wedding shit. You did what? Speak up. More wedding shit. More wedding shit.
Starting point is 00:01:40 No, I know why you're whispering it. See that? He's gonna make a great husband. That's gonna be a blast. Wedding shit. More wedding shit. I know why you're whispering it. See that? He's going to make a great husband. That's going to be a blast. I'm actually looking forward to that wedding. You know why? Because Dallas and his wife know good booze and good food.
Starting point is 00:01:58 And you think you took dance lessons. Wait till you see what I got in store for you. Ten minutes into that fucker, I'll have no shirt on him. We're doing a grab hat of speeches so people can drop a name in a hat and pull it out. I'm really curious to see what you do. Wait a minute. What do you mean? I'm not speaking. You don't have to, but you can put your name in a hat and speak if you want.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Oh. I don't want to ruin your wedding. Especially when I get a few drinks in me, I'll be like, what are you doing? You fucking got to regret this. Giano hit me with a full Heineken. I'll tell you who's going to be at a wedding. I met this older lesbian woman out in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and we got to get her to the wedding. We have a clip of her grandson pulled a prank on her.
Starting point is 00:02:48 My brother sent me this last night. I watched it, honest to God, five times in a row. And literally, my eyes were streaming. Because, folks, what comics find, and you should too, nothing funnier than a person's pain, whether it's mental anguish, just the pain of life. That's what I find funny.
Starting point is 00:03:09 Colin Quinn finds funny. Just watch this clip and fucking enjoy. I don't know why it struck my funny bum, but... What the fuck? What? Look at that. It's Spider-Man. That's fucking me. That's my fucking picture. That's fucking me. That's my fucking picture.
Starting point is 00:03:26 That's Peter Parker. That ain't Peter Parker. That is fucking me. Son of a bitch. Look here. Look at Shrek. They even got my fucking face on his eyes. Oh, hell no.
Starting point is 00:03:44 Oh, hell no. Oh, motherfucker. They even got me looking like Will on Stranger Things. Son of a bitch. What the hell's going on here? Where the fuck they get these? Hey, they got the new
Starting point is 00:03:59 great that photo. How mean is it? Motherfucker, that's me. How the fuck they get that? I don't know, Granny. Did you give them permission to use? Hell no. Okay.
Starting point is 00:04:15 What makes it even funnier, she's got a little heart pendant and a cross. Oh, my God. You know, and then you want to go, is that, and it's like, no. Nobody is that good an actor or actress. Oh my fucking word. There is a woman who's probably been gay
Starting point is 00:04:32 her whole life, and apparently in Oklahoma, wherever the hell, which isn't, you know, LGBT friendly, and her angst, she's had enough pain in her life, and now her grandson is fucking pranking her.
Starting point is 00:04:48 The anger and the fucking, it just, that's comedy gold. Just somebody in pain her whole life and just had enough. God, she talks like she's a hip-hop artist. But she
Starting point is 00:05:04 swears like a pirate, she's fucking you know oh my god the pendant shit I kept watching it I was in bed and my eyes were filling up anyways who knows my brother sent me that could be five years old I don't know first time I saw it so it had to be seen god damn it let's get to it let's get her to the wedding come on we'll pay her seen. God damn it. Let's get to it. Let's get her to the wedding. Come on. We'll pay her. I'll pay her.
Starting point is 00:05:29 All right, let's get to it. Ronnie versus Gavin. What is that? Gay pillow fight? Conservative commentator Sean Hannity, speaking of really funny people, good guy, though, of the Fox News Channel, is slated to moderate a debate between Governor Gavin Newsom and Florida Governor Ronnie DeSantis. This should be a bloodbath one way, according to Fox News Media,
Starting point is 00:05:58 which announced that a 90-minute debate will be held in Georgia on November 30th. Oh, boy, is this great. Oh, my God, this is going to be tremendous. And you know what this tells me, that Dinkweed who keeps denying he's going to run for president, why would you do that? Why would you go on Fox? You're reaching a bunch of people you normally wouldn't reach.
Starting point is 00:06:14 He knows what he's doing. And I just want to see him. I am so curious to see how he's going to defend his record as a governor of California and drove that state into the, I can't wait to see it. I mean, maybe he isn't because he's going to get obliterated. He really believes.
Starting point is 00:06:34 Hope it ends in a slap fight because when Ron gets mad, he gets a little fluffy. I don't know what the word is. Let's put it this way. That woman we just showed could kick the shit out of both these guys. Son of a bitch.
Starting point is 00:06:47 I'm looking forward to providing viewers with an informative debate about the everyday issues governing philosophies that impact the lives of every American, Hannity said. Nobody cares about you. Just sit there and mutter it. Both of the governors had – he's been to debate each other or wrestle in Speedos. What? Anyways, there they are. Put them up. Put them up. DeSantis, who was decisively reelected to a second term by Sunshine State voters in 2022,
Starting point is 00:07:25 currently running in the GOP presidential primary, though polls indicate that former President Donald Trump is curb stomping the motherfucker to say. Trump maintains a massive lead in the contest. Decline is a choice and success is attainable. As president, I will lead America's revival. I look forward to the opportunity to debate Gavin Newsom over our very different visions for the future of our country, DeSantis tweeted. Newsom survived a gubernatorial recall, if you recall, election in 2021.
Starting point is 00:08:01 That's a big lie. I don't believe for a second he fucking won that. But, you know, where would I get that idea that they cheat? And later went on to win a decisive re-election victory. Again, two lies in a row in my fucking opinion. You're a real crumbum. He really is. He sucks a bag of fucking ass cheese. The Golden State governor has been out. Golden State. Yeah, everybody's pissing on the sidewalks, taking dumps on your front lawn. The governor has been outspoken in supporting President Biden. That's how you know he's a fucking idiot. The New York Times has previously reported that Newsom said Democrats should rally around the incumbent president.
Starting point is 00:08:36 Yeah, but they didn't. He said that when the fucking, he still had three brain cells. Those are gone now. The train has left the station, Newsom said. You got that right. cells are those are gone now the train has left the station newsom you got that right if you're talking about biden's mind according to the outlet we're all in stop talking what does that even mean he's not going anywhere he's talking about biden it's time for all of us to get on the train and buck up what don't say word to me. I'll get up and I'll bury this telephone in your head.
Starting point is 00:09:07 Leftist and sweetie pie, and a Casparian. Oh, Gilligat! Of the young, the bold, and the restless. Jesus. Of the Young Turks. Oh yeah, she's the one. She was a left,
Starting point is 00:09:22 Young Turks is a real left show, but she, remember she came out do you remember what it was about dale it was a cove it's about several things kobe being one of them shutdowns being another the protest being one yes yeah that's right and she came out and made sense and they hate her now uh tweeted earlier this month that california is without question a show under newsom but i guess propping up proven failures is what the Democrat Party excels at. Here's a video. He must have its limits.
Starting point is 00:09:52 Oh, that's Newsom getting his head. Meeting the living daylights out of a little school. Look at DeSantis go, man. That's what it's going to look like, I swear to God. Hey, in the second half of the show, boys and girls, I it's going to look like, I swear to God. Hey, in the second half of the show, boys and girls, I'm going to be talking about, we'll talk about black people being real hypocrites when it comes to, excuse me, diversity.
Starting point is 00:10:14 Apparently, it's only important when things are going their way. And you'll like this story. Native Americans and how a group of Native Americans who has a lot of Paul apparently, are furious about the Redskins being called the Commanders now. And they want the old name back. That was pretty interesting. It's exclusively on Mug Club, so join now to get it at nickdip.com.
Starting point is 00:10:39 Excuse me. Hey, boys and girls, head over to nickdip.com to get exclusive hats, T-shirts, hoodies, and more. It's yet another way for you to support the show and look sexy at the same time. You can also get signed copies of my previous specials and all of the Nick-a-shirts. Just go to nickdip.com and click on store. Again, that's nickdip.com. Click on store. Again, that's nickdip.com. Click on store. Thank you guys so much.
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Starting point is 00:11:39 You're going to drive to, I don't know where you guys are. You're going to drive to the supermarket, but walk around. I'm the worst. I'll spend 40 minutes in there trying to decide, you know, between peaches and bananas. And you don't have to deal, you know, with a cashier with a lazy eye who's not paying attention. She's on herself. All that crap, they bring it right to your house. Okay. It saves a ton of time. You've trusted DoorDash to bring you nachos when you were drunk at 2 a.m. And now they're here to help you stock the pantry.
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Starting point is 00:13:00 Unless you like walking around and checking out the ladies and the fresh produce. Huh? Anyhow, let's move on. And we thank them for being a new sponsor. Joe backing the Don. Well, what in God's name does that mean? Joe Rogan, my buddy Joe, who I haven't talked to forever. The Joe Rogan Experience podcast, the most successful podcast on planet Earth,
Starting point is 00:13:26 literally, recently revealed who he would support and vote over current President Joe Biden in the presidential run in 2024. Joe Rogan revealed that he would vote for former President Donald Trump. What? Wait a minute now. Last time I was on there, we'll show it another time. Last time, that was the big, I'm wondering if that's why I'm not invited back. I don't know. But that was five years ago. And I was defending Trump when he was in office. And Joe's producer and him would go, he's the biggest liar.
Starting point is 00:13:59 They hit blah, blah, blah, blah. Anyways, I'm always ahead of the curve. You know what I'm saying? If I was in a hit sitcom and face a UFC, I'd have a lot of listeners too. But I love it. I don't give a shit. I mean, Joe Rogan, politics aside, I like him. Boston guy, hugely successful. Good guy too. Anyways, yeah, so he's going to vote for trump rogan praised trump on friday for having effective policies that help the economy by lowering restrictions and reducing unemployment so he's uh doing his homework
Starting point is 00:14:34 here's joe saying some of this right now you can't beat that guy you just can't when that guy gets out there and he's waving to people and they're going crazy you're not beating that there's a fucking and the fact that he was the president for four years and the country was in a great economic situation yeah and it looked like his policies were actually effective and it looked like the unemployment was down all business was building regulations were being relaxed more things were getting done. You know, when you look at it from a policy perspective, if you just look at it on paper, what he did was effective. A lot of people think it was effective. You don't like him as a personality, so you ignore that.
Starting point is 00:15:14 Don't do that. Look at it in terms of a policy perspective. People liked the ideas that he was putting forward. Not only did they like him, they liked him because they worked. You know what I mean? People don't just like ideas because you put them forward unless they benefit them. It's ridiculous. Don't anybody, I'd like to say to Joe, do you believe then that Biden really won the last election? You can't. There's no way. And he got more votes than Obama. You got to be dog-styling me. No way in hell.
Starting point is 00:15:47 So it's good to see. And that's, now here's the thing, right? And then he went on to talk about, you know, people going, oh, he's racist. Oh, the wall is racist. And he says, fucking everybody thinks there needs to be a wall, except for me. And I'm dead serious. I think that's a big farce. I say use the military. I'm dead serious. Fucking wall. Get out the flamethrowers. Seriously.
Starting point is 00:16:12 I want somebody to beat me in that argument, going, really? If you really wanted to defend it, right? Your life depends on it, which it does, the future. Really? You're going to put... Come on. Even the mayor of New York City, Joe was saying, is now calling to stop immigration into the city. When you just look at what Trump's policies were, and then obviously COVID hits, there's a lot to that. The lockdowns, the economic collapse, all that shit came with that. None of that is good. And then Trump holds up this hope to bring us back to where we were when he was in office. You're not going to beat that. And Joe knows a winner when he sees one.
Starting point is 00:16:51 I mean, he's a sports guy. I don't think you can beat that. I don't think you can argue with that. You are correct, sir. Thank you very much. La, la, la. But it's refreshing. And I was shocked to hear that.
Starting point is 00:17:05 The other thing is Joe, because I remember when I was on, when Joe talked about his, he was like raised by, I think he said his parents were kind of hippie-ish of that age. And Newton, Massachusetts is a hotbed of liberalism, by the way. You know? So I want to know the effect it's going to have on his fans, though. When you have, we're talking millions and millions of listeners. How many of them are going to get pissed that he said he's going to back Trump?
Starting point is 00:17:32 You know what I mean? If you have a small audience, one thing to say. But, you know, when you've got zillions, I've got to believe some of them could be hardcore Democrats, although he's an alpha male guy. So, I mean, the majority would probably agree with him. But I'm telling you, when you're that powerful, there's going to be, I think, a little bit of blowback. Some people even commented, it's like, all right, so what allegations do you have against you the past 30 years that are now going to come up?
Starting point is 00:18:01 That too. But his shit's already out there. Right? They'll trump up more shit. Yeah, well, they'll make it up. Yeah. No, yeah, you're always putting your neck out there. That's why it's pretty ballsy of him to do that. But that's what you've got to love about Joe
Starting point is 00:18:18 and guys like him and me. I never put my fucking career first. You think I wanted to take this path? Couldn't have fucking, I could have been a clean comic and done a hundred Lettermans or whatever and been Jim Gaffigan. Maybe not. You know what? I don't have that in me. And so anyhow.
Starting point is 00:18:36 Anyways, I'm glad he came around. Aren't you? Sure you is. Hey, for those of you on Mug Club, stick around for the second half of the show. Everyone else, go to nickdip.com. Join to get my full show, Stephen Crowder's full show. You get Brian Callen. You get the Hodge twins.
Starting point is 00:18:51 You get, on Friday, the white whale, Alex Jones. And he's working on more big names, not to mention they have the undercover thing where they do the Project Veritas thing with people who used to work at Project Veritas. The guy ain't playing anyways. So yeah, go to nickdip.com and join to get all that. guitar solo Outro Music

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