The Nick DiPaolo Show - More Hunter Home Movies | Nick Di Paolo Show #1421

Episode Date: July 3, 2023

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about Hunter's home videos, Trump in SC and more! Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://NickDiPaoloShow.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

🎵 Good morning, my neighbors! Hello. Hey, fuck you! Oh. Good morning, my friends. Happy... What's this? White... I don't know. Oh, good morning, my friends. Happy, what's this, white?

Probably creamer or jizz. Okay. Hi, kids. How it is, what it was. Fourth of July is tomorrow. That makes today the third. That's right. Good job. University of Maine. Bachelor's degree.

Yeah, so we'll be off tomorrow. Let me get that out of the way. And they take their fireworks serious down here in the state of, I mean, we can go downtown. I could walk two and a half miles. We'll probably drive. My wife doesn't like to walk. She's paralyzed from the waist down. I could drag her down there. So we go down there and we'll watch that. And we come back to my house.

Then I can sit on my front steps and watch people two streets over shooting almost like real commercial-grade fireworks. They go nuts down here. It's insane. Somebody tell them they lost that war. Well, no, no, that's the other. Get out of the way. Anyway, so, yeah. So have a good time wherever you are.

Drink up, drive, have hot dogs. Do all the things that... Red Sox, I can't. Poor bastards. Everybody's getting hurt. I don't know how Cora does it, man. If they were in another division, they'd be in first place in a few divisions.

They're two games over.500, but that in this division, you know, Tampa Bay and Dallas' Braves have the best record in baseball. They're ripping off wins like nothing. Sox last year, this is for you guys, I guess, from Boston. I feel guilty. But they lost to the Blue Jays 16 out of 19 times. I didn't know you played a team 19 times. You don't anymore. But 16 out of 19 times last year. And the Sox,

and the Blue Jays are just as good as they were last year. And the Sox aren't as good as they were last year. We've beaten them six out of six this year. We swept them last weekend at Fenway, and we go up to Toronto, and I'm like, they're going to get their heads handed to them. I mean, throwing guys out at the plate to end the game. I mean, double plays that make highlight reel. It's fucking insane.

Pitching, this guy Paxton, big lefty, throws 97. Christ, he had given up like two hits, and he went all the way to the eighth inning or whatever just tremendous uh what's his name fucking doogie hauser verdugo throws the guy out at the plate throws the same guy out at second base last night and hits the winning home run in the eighth inning he's he's the top right fielder in the eighth inning. He's the top right fielder in the American League in as far as average go, hitting average too. And he might not be an all-star. I don't fucking get that. Nothing to get your panties in a bunch. I'm just giving you. So what else is going on? Oh, Clint Eastwood. You might've heard of him. He's directing a movie on my street today. He's a block down and come 11 o'clock, which it already is.

What am I saying? It's almost one o'clock. From 11 to one or two, they're going to be shooting right in front of my house, supposedly. I want to get a pic, but I can't. I'm not one of those guys. I don't want to be that pain in the ass. I never could be. Although at this point, I could wrestle him down. I don't know. No, I don't. I'm not one of those guys. I don't want to be that pain in the ass. I never could be. Although at this point,

I could wrestle him down. I don't know. No, I don't either. That's a good point. He's 93, guys. I want you to let this settle in. I didn't want to get out of bed today. He's 93. He's 93 fucking three.

Do you know what a call time is on a movie set? His was probably four because he's the director. Do you understand? He's 90. Still has the mental ac time is on a movie set? His was probably four because he's the director. Do you understand? He's 90. Still has a mental acuity to direct a movie and the stamina to fucking laugh the fuck. And 95 degrees in Savannah. That's right. That's right.

At 11 o'clock. So that's kind of cool. I don't want to, you know, I'm going to try to get them away. I'm going to keep running by with no shirt on. They're going to go, get them out of there. I'm going to act like I have nothing to do with show. Well, I really don't. But I'm going to go off to them away. I'm going to keep running by with no shirt on. They're going to go, get them out of there. I'm going to act like I have nothing to do with show. Well, I really don't, but I'm going to go off to my house. I was in a few movies.

I'm going to, remember Louis C.K.? Jerked off in front of this girl? Yeah. So that's, how cool is that, though? That's a tribute to my street and how beautiful it is. That's like the second or third movie since I, but Clint Eastwood, holy moly. And my wife dragged me to a flea market,

so we're getting divorced on Monday. I mean, dragged me to a flea market, so we're getting divorced on Monday. I mean, next week. That flea market, you know, you've been, right? Do they usually have air conditioning, Della? Oh, they don't? It's always like that? Are you fucking sucking my... And most of the vendors are like Mexicans and blacks.

I bought my own hubcaps back. At a discount. At a discount. Yeah, that was just, I think they were packing up. I don't know. It was very depressing though. Andy had a good one.

She's like, yeah, they're probably like, they got there, it was 102 degrees in there. They're like, I'm not going to sit here for eight hours so I can sell a beanie baby for six bucks. And yeah, that's about it. It's been really, it's been Georgia hot summer, nothing fucking

that I can't handle. I actually went in our tool shed yesterday. It was 96 over that with a heat index. Went in the tool shed, shut the door, and hit the heavy bag for 40 minutes. Dude, I'm taping my hands, you know, before you put boxing gloves on, and I'm covered in sweat. I'm just taping my hands. It's a good time to fucking diet because I'm only pooping once every eight days. I'm so dehydrated. It's really gross. All right. Too much info. I understand. Let's get to it. Hunter's hidden movies. More movies be coming out. They don't know if they're from that laptop or another laptop. Newly released photos allegedly show Hunter Biden speeding at 100. That's not a photo. That's a video. Speeding at 172 miles per hour in a school zone. No.

And flashing a crack pike while behind the wheel. I'm sorry, but I kind of like this guy. A recently surfaced video reportedly reveals the son of Joe Biden talking with a naked woman. I want to see this shit. About possibly being blackmailed over his recorded sexcapades after having his laptop containing footage of him engaged in what he called crazy fucking sex. It was stolen. Good for you. Good for you, kid.

A cachet. All right, we get it, Hunter. A cachet of nearly 10,000 photos from Hunter Biden's laptop dated between 2008, 2019. That's a lot of fucking. Were released last month on a website developed by the nonprofit research group Marco Polo. The Daily Mail published a video purportedly recorded in January 2019 and extracted from Hunter's infamous laptop that was reportedly abandoned at a Delaware computer repair shop. After filming himself having sex with a hooker using his laptop in January 29th, he really is a dummy,

Hunter left the camera rolling as he recounted a Vegas bender in which he spent 18 days, 18, going round from penthouse to penthouse suite, sometimes costing $10,000 a night. In the video published by the UK news outlet, Hunter Biden allegedly details how a drug dealer stole a laptop from him. And there was this Russian 35-year-old, this is him talking, really nice, pure brunette,

okay? Biden is allegedly seen on video telling a nude woman. Then Biden says she refused to leave and they wouldn't call an ambulance. Hunter reportedly said in the video, and they didn't know if I was dead or alive at first. Hello? Hello? Hello? They checked to see if I was breathing. A nude hunter reportedly said, when I finally showed signs of breath, at first I wasn't breathing. I was in the fucking pool he says face down they don't know how long oh my i think we got a video in the pool he was all fucked up wasn't he well he's all right there Oh, God. Kind of look like him. What the fuck?

Huh? And it's funny because my wife says, he's so dumb. And I go, I, she's like, why? I can't remember what her theory was. And I said, here's the theory. He fucking deep down, he hates his old man for something. You know? I mean, he said that in other interviews where he had, you know, wasn't exactly.

And subconsciously or consciously, he's fucking with the old man. You know, but it doesn't matter because Biden's in somebody's pocket anyways. It doesn't matter what his son does, apparently. And he's not in jail for all this shit. If you knew you're going to have immunity, I think you'd be doing shit like that too. I would. I'm a filthy pig. Back in the day. Now I'm an old man who can't shit.

Anyways, I don't know. He's a guy's guy. You know who he is? I said to Andy. He's the fucking Charlie Sheen of the Biden family. Hey, in the second half of the show, I'll be talking about Washington, D.C. was rocked by three explosions this weekend. And another famous NFL player in trouble for domestic violence.

It's exclusively on Mug Club. So join now to get it at NickDepaloShow.com. to get it at nickdipaloshow.com. Hey, boys and girls, head over to nickdip.com to get exclusive hats, T-shirts, hoodies, and more. It's yet another way for you to support the show and look sexy at the same time. You can also get signed copies of my previous specials and all of the Nick-a-shirts.

Just go to nickdip.com and click on Store. Again, go to nickdip.com and click on store. Again, that's nickdip.com, click on store. Thank you guys so much. See you soon. That fucking league has some brutal fellas, huh? Why do they bother getting married? You know what I mean? They're out there on the road,

fucking everything that moves. If Brady can't make it work, I don't think anybody can in the NFL. Yeah. And of course, Brady's was for a different reason because of his fucking work ethic. It wasn't because he was cheating on someone.

At least, you know, we know. But the brothers, come on. It doesn't matter if they're a fucking janitor or an NFL player. They're going to fucking fuck around. They got tons of bling and they're black chicks. Haven't you watched Housewives of Atlanta? I don't know what I'm talking about.

I'm just saying, guys, stay single. You got millions? Do you want to blow it all on hookers? Why do you want to fucking? They need somebody to talk to them. I'm a Dr. Phil type. Well, listen, Haskins. You fucking everything that moves, what do you need hair for?

Anyways, let's get on to our boy, Donald Trump, what he be doing. Well, easy pickings for Trump is the headline. Former President Donald Trump on Saturday marked a return to the large-scale rallies of his previous presidential campaigns. Hold it, burp. All right, thank you. Oh, that was gay. Speak. Oh, come.

No. Speaking to thousands gathered in the streets of a small South Carolina city on a blazing day ahead of the Fourth of July. You know that's his type of, uh, for South Carolina, you don't get any more red meat than that. You know that's his type of, uh, South Carolina, you don't get any more red meat than that. You know what I'm saying?

I'm just kidding, folks. I love it down there. There's nowhere else I'd rather be to kick off the 4th of July, he said, which we know he's lying, because I'll be a Melania's muff up to my neck. The 4th of July weekend, then right here on Main Street with thousands of hardworking

South Carolina patriots who believe in God, family, and country. Trump said, and he didn't do it in that accent, I did, to a roaring crowd standing on asphalt. Why? Couldn't find that football field? Temperatures climbed into the 90s.

It wasn't immediately clear how many people had gathered in the streets of downtown Pickens. I love that name. Pickens Cotton, a small city in South Carolina, conservative upstate of around 3,400. The town's only 3,400. Law enforcement officials told some media outlets that around 15,000 people had gathered by 11 a.m. Now today it said, someone said up to

54,000. That's what you are before. Yeah. You can put Biden in any state. Put him in his home state. Put him anywhere. The bluest state in the world. He's going to get 11 people. And that goes for the other schmucks that are running. Anyways, by 11 a.m., two hours before Trump's remarks. Here are some of those remarks right here. We have some video and he's, you know,

he's Trump. He's just, can you imagine he's got that indictment hanging over his head? And he's just, he fucking run towards the fight. Nothing bothers this guy. He's like a machine. Anyways, here's him talking to the pickings crowd. We appointed nearly 300 federal judges and three Supreme Court justices. And this week, those justices ruled to move our country forward with a merit-based system of education. How big is that?

And. Yeah, what else? He was the best guy around. What do you mean was? Well, he's going to jail. No, we don't know that. The heavily Republican area is popular, is a popular one for GOP hopefuls as they aim to attract support for South Carolina's first in the South presidential primary.

In recent months, other candidates, including Florida Governor Ronnie DeSantis, former Vice President Mike, why are you running for President Pence? Got the personality of a fucking cucumber. What in God's name? Again, trying to stay relevant. And biotech entrepreneur Vivek Ramaswamy, who by the

way, in a perfect world, would be giving Trump a good run for his money, in my opinion. Because he's as conservative and he fucking, he's, yes, he's got these big ideas. I wish I could name one right now. But he has a whole different angle and he hates the left as much as Trump does. I don't know. I think someday he'd make a hell of a president.

Anyways, Mike Pence, go back to the whatever. And yeah, Ramaswamy have all held events in the upstate, in the upstate. In the upstate what? State? As well as the two South Carolinians in the race, former Governor Nikki Haley. I'd vote for Pence before her. What is she thinking? Get back to Calcutta. And Senator Tim Scott, who's got teeth like Mr. Ed. I got a better chance of winning. He's a good guy. He's got teeth like Mr. Ed.

But nobody, and I mean nobody, drew a crowd like Trump, whose appearances effectively shut Pickens, quintessential southern downtown. They had to shut down the big downtown area because Trump took over the goddamn town. I am like God and God like me. I am as large as God. He is as small as I. He cannot above me.

Against him, Pickens. This was only Trump's second large rally of the 2024 campaign. In March, he rallied in Waco, Texas, in front of a burning thing, religious house. David Koresh. That's all I remember. Got the name. David Koresh. That's all I remember.

Got the name. In Waco, Texas, disparaging the prosecutors, then investigating him on hush money charges on which he was later indicted and predicting his vindication. A planned outdoor rally in Iowa in May. The gist of this article at the end

was that he's not going as hard as he did or he's campaigning differently. Yeah, he's got the world against him, once again. An outdoor rally in Iowa in May was canceled due to tornado warnings. Okay, so you don't count that against. The rallies are also expensive to put on. Yeah, I'm sure he's broke. Although Trump has continued to bring in millions in fundraising

after both the New York indictment and also federal charges related to his retention of classified documents. All a fucking sham. After leaving the White House last month, senior Trump aide Chris LaCivita told the conservative Roofless podcast that the rallies are a half million dollars a pop. It's interesting because the big donors, remember we were talking about, they all went to, they were all sucking DeSantis' ass a few months ago. I don't know if this, if this money that Trump gets is grassroots stuff, probably. I don't know. Point is, he's still the most popular by a

mile. And I think people are thinking like, again, you know me, I don't believe in any of this. It's all a script. But I'll play along. If I had to vote for him, I'm voting for him because he got fucked out of an election. Excuse me. And I like DeSantis. And he should throw DeSantis on the ticket. That's never going to happen.

But that would be unbeatable. No? Then you take Nikki Haley and you throw her on the ticket. That's never going to happen. But that would be unbeatable. No? Then you take Nikki Haley and you throw her in the river. Tie her to Mike Pence. She's a nice lady. She was on Gutfeld's show, you know. But yeah, we've read some quotes,

right? That fucking smell like global is horseshit to me women can't you to PC except for Hillary she's just a vile twat and plays like a man so she does because she likes snatch good night everybody here's Dallas for the weather Here's Dallas for the weather. It's hot! That's it. Back to you. We'll do that. You go, it's hot! Back to you, Nick. That's how it should be.

I had a good one today. I go, there was a weatherman. I liked him. He's kind of got a fucking chip on his shoulder down here. I don't know who he is. And my wife said, what do you mean? What's he doing? I go, well, he says like fucking dark shit. You know, I go, he goes, today it's 98 degrees with a heat index.

It's 105. Good day to leave a baby in the car. Anyway, that's how the news should be. Just for a laugh. Come on. Anyways, here's a town that got bombed this weekend i was very happy about it i'm hoping it's right wingers who had enough washington dc rocked police in washington dc are seeking the public's help yeah we'll be right there so you can arrest us uh they need help locating the suspects behind attacks against a bank, a retail outlet, and grocery store.

Damage with explosive devices within 15 minutes of each other early on Sunday morning. Anybody check Hunter? He was mixing some meth at the Four Seasons and then he ran to Publix to get a sausage. Three stores in Northeast D.C. reported damage according to a statement

from the Metropolitan Police Department's Criminal Investigation Division and the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms and Explosives Washington Field Division. Can we get a few more people on it? Typical Washington. Probably eight other things I didn't mention.

Then the Girl Scouts stuck their busybody noses in it, and the Eagle Scouts were there. The first explosive went off at about 4.30 a.m. I'm telling you, it's Hunter. Near Washington Place, outside an ATM at a, well, last time I checked, banks and ATMs had a shitload of cameras, even at night, before the suspect drove off, according to the authorities. Another devised, devised? Yeah, that's right, it's past tense. Reportedly exploded outside a Nike

store. Blacks. Blacks! A Nike store on 8th Street north of Capitol Hill just six minutes after the first blast. A surveillance camera caught the on video, it says. That's me.

Caught the suspect on video but only for a few seconds. He was wearing a blue surgical mask. They have the footage. He was in a park as the sun was coming up. Good fucking asshole. I knew it. Oh, Joe, Joe, Joe.

Oh, Joe, Joe, Joe. Oh, fucking idiot. A suspect then allegedly tossed a Molotov cocktail at a Safeway on 40th, let me see, Nike store Safeway, on 40th Street at around 4.45 a.m. before speeding off, police said. Hey, you guys who write articles and shit, at the end of every fucking thing, after told this is a police are investigating don't say the

police said yeah understand your motherfuckers who do you think said it the fucking New York Rangers goalie what the fuck because all three establishments were closed at the time oh pussies these guys weren't real nobody was injured again thank you

it would have been funny if 40 people injured at a closed Safeway but each reported damage to their buildings including shattered windows that's what happens when you

throw bombs at a building. Windows break and shit. This article sucks a dog's balls. Police believe the businesses were targeted instead of people. Well, that's, then I'd put a, that's probably our own government. Fucking

look for Dick Durbin on surveillance and AOC. Anyways, according to their statement, and who's that, the cops? No, the Eagle Scouts. Hey, thanks. Violent crime in the nation's capital is up 10% because a colored woman is running the city. Cut. What?

Who said? Violent crime in the nation's capital up 10% from the same time last year, which includes a 15% rise in homicides, according to data released in May. Hey, for those of you on the Mug Club, stick around for the second half of the show. Everyone else go to nickdapaloshow.com and get my full show. And get Steven Crowder's and a whole lot more. And you can click on my tour dates.

I'm going to be right there. Arlington Cinnamon Drafthouse, July 14 and 15 in Arlington, Virginia. That's coming up. guitar solo We'll be right back.