The Nick DiPaolo Show - MSM Openly Anti White Male | Nick Di Paolo Show #555

Episode Date: June 14, 2021

Spineless liberal media lying about race again. Hacking software discovered on Dominion voting machines. Make Me A Sandwich.

🎵 Oh yeah! Welcome everybody on a Monday from the state of Georgia. Good to be with you. Uh, as always, remember this when you go through life. You're entitled to shit. Exactly. You know you want crazy motherfucking whopper. I have Nick the pig as a friend. You're lucky. You fucking cocaine snorting bitch. How's it going, folks?

Well, we made national news right here in my hometown of Savannah. Nice mass shooting. About two and a half miles from me, but that's how it is here. You know, it's every, you know, you gotta be gay, you know what I'm saying. Right away, I had to be racist.

Probably a black name. Jesus, wasn't I right again? I mean, the odds of me getting that right, I think it was nine people shot. A couple of kids. Two kids are going to survive. I mean, I'm talking young kids. And one person, I'm watching the news. Excuse me.

Shannon Breen breaks it. I think it was Friday night. Oh, and this from out of town. A mass shooting. And I'm like, where. Excuse me. Shannon Breen breaks it. I think it was Friday night. Oh, and this from out of town. A mass shooting. And I'm like, where now? Fuck it. I sat right up in my wheelchair and said, what? Spilled my hot cocoa.

And yeah, I'm like, so I get out my Waze thing. Yeah, about 2.3 miles. Again, black on black. And that's pretty much the theme of this show so you won't be hearing much details about it and i'll get to another one that was in austin texas 13 or 14 people shot again black on black wait till i get to that story. And it's just, if there's any cancer in this country that's dividing us the most and killing us the most, it's how the jerk-off mainstream media covers black and white crime. And how they've been cherry-picking stories for years. And people dumb it up to buy into the fucking narrative. If you can't see it now, get out of my country, jack off.

Don't forget this weekend, I'll be at the Sons of Herman Hall in Dallas, Texas, Friday and Saturday night. I'll be on Steve and Crowder's show on Thursday morning, I believe. So keep that in mind. Gotta go out and make that cheddar if I'm going to load up on ammunition. Know what I'm saying? Living here in the streets. Let's get right to it because, my God, I think we have a lot to get to. too um first thing up ladies and gentlemen even cnn which is part of the a4 mainstream a4 mentioned mainstream media that just is just chicken shit they couldn't even come up with a way to put a positive spin on this abortion of a vice president and uh her fucking disastrous first trip no wonder why she hasn't been to the border.

She knows wherever she goes, she's going to turn it into a fiasco. But this comes from, and I'll repeat it, this comes from CNN. Do you know how fucking off the reservation and how bad you have to be if you're a Democrat and CNN's poo-pooing your performance? Do you understand that? It's fucking priceless.

Let's take a look at this. Kamala. and CNN's poo-pooing your performance. Do you understand that? It's fucking priceless. Let's take a look at this. Camilla. You haven't been to the border. And I haven't been to Europe. I don't understand the point that you're making. I said I'm going to go to the border. When are you going to the border, Vice President? The administration has asked...

I'm not finished. Pause. I said I'm going to the border, Vice President? The administration has asked... I'm not finished. Pause. I said I'm going to the border. I'm not finished with that fake laugh. What a... Talk about entitled. How dare you, ma'am. I'm not finished.

Imagine being married to that. I would fucking cut her head off with a hacksaw every morning. Even though I'd only do that once. Go ahead. Border. head off of the hacksaw every morning. Even though it only could do that once. Go ahead. It's just a little cringeworthy. And I know that her allies in the White House and elsewhere are watching it and just kind of wondering what is going on.

Well, the world needs ditch diggers too. That's what she'll be doing. That's a pretty black lady on CNN going, what the fuck? You know why she said that? Because she's a real black lady. She's probably pissed that Kamala is appropriated. Fucking Indian and Jamaican. Oh, my goodness gracious.

But that was on our favorite network of all time. This is CNN. Yeah. Mistrusted name in news. Ah! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Ha! Ha! Ha! I'll say this again. I've said it many times. At least MSNBC tells you that they're full of shit and that they're lefties. That's why CNN's so fucking evil. They pretend they're an objective news network.

My God. May Don Lemon die a slow death. But that's CNN poo-pooing on Kamala Harris's trip. How can you look at somebody and go, yeah, but you haven't been there yourself. I don't understand the point you're making. See, now, if Lester Holt had a pair of balls and not a giant clit, he would have went, well, I think it's very clear. I said, you haven't been there yourself. I'm not making a point. I'm asking a pointed question.

So answer it. Fucking first vice president, female, jack off. You know, I got to admit, the country ran much better when white guys are running it. Case closed. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. Everybody knows that, but we have to pretend otherwise. Oh, God, let me compose myself. No coffee. I came in. I forgot to bring coffee. I'm Jones. And anyways, so they, you know, that was a slice of honesty from CNN,

which we never see. And even I was in shock. But then it went back, the news on the weekend, to the typical spineless lib media lying about, again, the issue of race again. The Austin American Statesman newspaper declined to publish, get this, hold yourselves, this has been going on forever, but they declined to publish a police description of a black mass shooting suspect because the paper felt, this is quotes, such publication could be harmful and perpetuating stereotypes. Now, let me talk to you people who run that paper, you fucking ignorant. Yeah, it's not stereotypes when it's happening every minute of every day and night, okay? It's called reality.

And the sooner you get used to that, but you're so crooked. Apparently, the leftist media feels that the public's right to know does not supersede the tenets of racial wokeness. 14 people were injured in a mass shooting in Austin at approximately 1.30 a.m. Saturday morning. And, you know, we don't want to perpetuate stereotypes when they're actually the fucking problem. You're the fucking problem? You fucking Dr. White onking jam rag, onking spunk bubble, I'm telling you, H. You keep looking at me, I'm going to put you in the fucking ground, I promise you. You're not going to find a more liberal town than Austin, Texas, believe it or not.

It's like a little tumor. It's a colon polyp, otherwise pretty good state. Police stated that a suspect, listen to this, described as a black man, at least the cops said that, with a thin frame and lock style hair. Oh my God, that's a stereotype. No, that's what he had. Was still at large after the police took one other suspect into custody.

But at least one paper decided to keep its readers blissfully unaware of the appearance of an at-large suspect. Police have only, this is what the paper said, police have only released a vague description of this suspected shooter as of Saturday morning. The Austin American-Statesman is not including the description as it is too vague. Black guy, thin build, locks. What do you want, a stool sample? Too vague.

So they say the description's too vague at this time to be useful in identifying the shooter and such publication could be harmful in perpetuating stereotypes. This is how they've been treating racial black crime for years, though. If more detailed information is released, we will update our reporting according to the newspaper's statement on their journalistic omission.

Oh, think about that. What you just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things i've ever heard everyone in this room is now done for having listened to in this country may god have mercy on your soul why did the headline just be like this you hear about the shooting the black kid with locks shot like 1340 people.

The liberal media in America constantly fans of flames of anti-white hatred, while often making sure to conceal the race of non-white people who commit violent crime. And if that's news to you, you've been sleeping for about 40 years. National File reported on March 26th, booking photographs from the latest police crackdown on anti-Asian hate crimes in New York City revealed this week what many citizens already knew. All the perpetrators wanted arrested in relation to the attacks were non-white. My buddy who used to be a cop, I referenced him many times in Florida,

I remember him telling me this. They had on the local stations down there, I don't know if it was public access, but they had a list of the most wanted people in Miami, like every Friday night, and they got rid of it. Why? Well, there were no white people in it. You know how irresponsible that is? What if you're near that shooting, and that kid is on the loose? You know what I mean? It's just, the media's narrative regarding white supremacy has been dealt a severe credibility blow as the mugshots here correlate with government data that shows the perpetrators of anti-Asian violence are almost exclusively non-white. And thank you for explaining that.

I'm black, y'all, and I'm black, y'all, and I'm blacker than black, and I'm black, y'all. I thought that would they put up the Houston Astros infielders. Oh, for the love of God, Nick. that when they put up the Houston Astros infielders. Oh, for the love of God, Nick. The mugshots show a list of suspects who appear to be exclusively of Black or Middle Eastern descent. Former NYPD officer John Cardillo captioned the video. He put booking, booking pics of those arrested for anti-Asian attacks in New York City. Damn white supremacists. Oh my God, John, they're going to come after you. How dare you put the truth on the Internet, especially when it involves people of color.

Why don't we just admit it? Why don't we just think about this? And I said this, what, a week ago? Take all the crime committed by black and brown people in this country, or just take the inner cities, which is basically the same. Remove all those. What would the crime rate be? Even with the white supremacists factored in, what would it be?

4%? Do the same with SATs. What? That's not true. Asians and Indians kicked that number up. Good point. Do you believe that, though? There's nothing, there is no issue where the gap is wider between what you say in public and what you say in private than race. And you can thank that. See, like I said, before I followed politics,

I was about 25 years old. I looked at my buddy. I still remember sitting in his apartment watching. I go, let me ask you a question. Because there were about three news stories about white crime. And I said, has a black person done anything bad in the last 30 years in this country? What the fuck? I wasn't even following politics. Anyways. Let's stay on the issue of race because the shit I'm about to talk about now really

feeds the narrative. And boy, are they stepping on the gas with both feet, the libs. I don't know how, again, I don't know how they think they're going to win anything in the midterms with this cycle, again, unless dominions evolve. But anyway, Kurt Schliester, I don't know if you've known him. I've had him on the show when this show was fairly new. He's a great writer. I don't even remember where I met him.

Maybe at Fox or something. Great frigging writer. Well, he tweeted this this weekend. I just, this says it all. If this doesn't capture what's going on in America in 2020, since Biden took fucking the reins. He says, I see the gopher of the con and cruise ship got the memo. I don't even know what that means.

This is critical race theory. And he wants us to sit there and watch. Nope. The time of the submissive sissy has passed. Well, I haven't seen any evidence of that yet, but look at her. Can we blow it up so we can read what's on that whiteboard? All white people are racist, underlined. diversity, all the buzzwords that you fucking liberal cocksuckers believe in that have only destroyed this country. But look at the teacher. Doesn't that say it all? She's fucking, you know, who is she teaching? Those are adults, probably from some corporation. And they're all looking at her giant camel toe going, what the fuck? She looks like a bag of onions, this fat pig.

You fat, nasty black bitch. Yeah. Y'all fat fuck, look at you. So, can you imagine thinking that's appropriate to wear? Again, I blame Oprah for that.

You go, girl. You're beautiful no matter what. Shut it. This broad probably has a rape whistle on her keychain too because she's convinced she's a piece of ass.

So not only is she fat and disgusting, she hates white people and she gets to teach it, because it's illegal now. Discrimination is legal. Keep sending your kids to schools, and it's not just college anymore.

Pre-K, whatever the fuck. You'll get them back around fourth grade, and they'll be doing the Black Power sign at breakfast. Good luck to you people. I'm glad I couldn't have kids. I got hit with a line drive in high school. Well, which one? I'm glad I couldn't have kids. I got hit with a line drive in high school. I pretend this is good for me, you know, because I'm not smoking cigarettes.

I hocked up a clam today. I spit it in the sink. It chipped the porcelain. What? True story. True story. Let's get to some other things besides race, but it's all tied in, right? Let's go to some, it's coming out, folks. Drip, drip, drab it.

I told you. November 3rd and all the fraud that went on. Hacking software discovered on Dominion voting machines. Ah! This shocked me as much as finding out all the anti-Asian crime or black perpetrators. Hacking software on Dominion voting machines in key battleground states, June 13, 2021.

And I'll say it again, Trump doesn't lie about the big shit. He's been right about all of it, from Wuhan lab to stopping the fucking flights from China to everything else, even him winning the election. However, Wake TSI, they did the assessment on the machine, said it found five issues of note, including that Dominion failed to meet the Commonwealth's, this is Pennsylvania we're talking about, certification standards, that the election management system had Microsoft SQL server data tools installed. Despite the software not being part of the United States Election Assistance Commission, that's EAC,

certified configuration, and that changes were made to the management system, get this, just three weeks prior to the election. Hacking shit. Hacking software. You think they're making this up, folks? But you're not going to hear about it much, right? Of course not. Nothing to see here.

Please, Pittsburgh. Nothing to see here. Please. Assessors, and that would be the Wake WTI, said there is no valid reason for the software to be installed on the system and that presence allows any user with access to change and manipulate the EMS databases without logging, recording the database, EMS or operating system log files. So there's no reason for that shit to be on there other than, you know, in case you wanted

to steal an election. What a corrupt, horrible time to be alive. That's why I'm upping my dose of Lexapro and mixing it with Tito's. They also said that Dominion failed to fill out a document that attests that the installed software versions conformed with certified reasons, with Dominion apparently claiming filling out the form was optional. How can something that important be optional? That's your best answer, you lying fucks? I'm more of the president than Joe Biden right now. Just think about that. Dominion voting systems disputed the report's findings related to it, naturally. The Microsoft software is a federally certified component of Dominion systems, which meets United States Election Assistance Commission, that's EAC,

voluntary voting system guidelines. Well, we disrefuted that two paragraphs ago, according to people who assessed your system. A spokesperson said in an email, adding, only federal and state entities have the authority to certify voting machines. Dominion systems have been certified by both the U.S., EAC, and the state of Pennsylvania. You mean the state where Joe Biden was getting smoked, and then around 5 a.m. there was a spike of 100,000 votes that went all his way? Kiss my grits, kiss my white slash brown beige ass. It's just some software that you can use for hacking, and we just put it on three weeks before the big election.

I mean, what's the big deal? A search of the voluntary guidelines did not turn up any mention of Microsoft SQL Server data tools, which can be used to create, debug, maintain, and rewrite the source code of a database. I think when you hear rewrite, that might set off a... Danger, Will Robinson. Absolutely. Danger, no, Will Robinson. Danger.

But my question is, the people that were running that election in Pennsylvania, where were you? The people that, you know, because people are assigned to find shit like that. What were you doing? Huh? Where was you? This is just Pennsylvania, folks. We know Maricopa County, they're finding all kinds of shit. Somebody put, and this was great, somebody put,

I love to read the comments because there's some real smart people. He goes, okay, let me make a prediction right now. So this is going to happen, and they'll find out Joe's not a valid president, right? So they'll insert Kamala, who will obviously be in overhead so much that she'll be yanked for, and then he used a reference, the something of Huff. I think he was talking about Hillary Clinton. It had to be Hillary. I don't know other woman you could pop in there.

Which, that doesn't sound that far-fetched to me. But I would think if it's overturned, you've got to put Trump in there, right? But what do I know? What do I know? I get straight A's in every class I took. Right. Except for finance, D. Except for calculus, D. Except for finance, D. Except for calculus, D. Except for statistics, D. 2.4, business administration.

But I didn't cheat, and I was an athlete, so give me some slack. I was chasing girls from Lewistead who had ankles on them, like fucking circus elephants. Let's take a break. You know, today's Flag Day. Guys, guys, a few things I want to mention. Today is Flag Day. As you know, you can tell from the flag display on my desk and on my arm that I don't take this stuff lightly. I want to show you this display picture of a flag from a couple of fans of mine. Look at this beautiful piece of work.

They made that cabinet. Look how beautiful that is. John Miller, Dave Rodriguez, and Dave Jost, who are all cops in St. Louis, sent me this flag case to put my dad's flag in. My dad, as you know, is a Marine. He passed away last summer from Alzheimer's. I just want to thank John, Dave, and Dave. Let you know that my family and I appreciate you, and it will display the flag in the case in our home.

I know right where it's going. This is a truly special gift. Look at that. I mean, you see it up close, the woodwork and they make these. I want to thank you guys again. That was unbelievably generous. So thank you so much. I have the best fans in the world. I swear to God. There's an inscription on it. I can't read it right now, and I don't have it memorized, but beautifully done. So also another announcement for you guys, other than John Miller. I'll be in Dallas, as I mentioned,

this Friday and Saturday at the Sons of Herman Hall doing stand-up. I love crowds in Texas and can't wait for these shows. Get your tickets at nickdip.com. One of my best sets in the last five years was at the Texas Theater in Dallas. And like I said, man, they don't flinch at anything. Holy moly. I was flinching.

But I can't wait to do. Texas has always been a great state, obviously, for my comedy. So and again, thank you guys again for that. But that generous guy, I get I have the best fans. Look, I got this ring. Remember, I thought his big, scary dude gave me this friggin ring. And a lady gave me a tie and a bag with whiskey in it and vodka and a little bit of heroin. I couldn't believe, but I always, I can't thank you enough. Anyways, let's move on, shall we? Make me a sandwich. Make me a fucking sandwich. In our make me a sandwich segment today, our Make Me a Sandwich segment today. Angry dyke teacher angry because she's a dyke. End of story.

That's what I wrote. Michelle Malkin, who we absolutely love, and me and Colin Quinn has been in love with this woman forever. She's, what is she, Filipino? I don't know, but she's fucking smart and hot. And she was always brutally honest. She used to be on Fox about race issues to the point where, you know, she was too hot for them to handle. So I think you can catch her on Newsmax or one of those channels. Anyways, she put up on Twitter, watch LGBTQXYZ pimping sixth grade teacher in Springfield, Missouri, bullies boy, white boy, who asked why straight kids weren't allowed to have her unicorn cupcakes. This to me, this piece of footage, you know how I feel.

This just sums up the anti-white male and just how hateful, I'm going to put a number on number on it 78 of lesbians are uh teacher screams that the student is ignorant straight up jerk weasel she said uh she didn't say dip she said dick didn't? It sounds like dick and then she walks it back. She walks it back and says, I said like dip isn't dip shit. No, you said dick, you fat, angry twat and butthead. That's what she said to a sixth grade student.

By the way, this guy sounds like he's 38. This kid's voice is deeper than mine is. Anyways, Michelle puts hashtag gender unicorn unicorn hashtag alphabet soup tyranny i fucking love it um but take a look at this broad and i'll say it again well i'll tell you why after we watch her in action just because i support another thing doesn't mean i don't support straight people too just because i'm mexican doesn't mean i don't support straight people, too. Just because I'm Mexican doesn't mean I don't want to support black people. Pause. Did you say because I'm Mexican?

Yep. I didn't. See, I didn't pick up that. Oh, so she's a fucking brown. Angry. Lap chapper. Chatter. Chumper.

Anyways, let her roll the pig. Irish people. Or ignorant people. Never said it was like that. Okay. Never said it was like that. Okay. Just said it'd be dead. No worries. Would you like a special unicorn cupcake for being straight jerk?

Yes. All right, come here. Just reach your cupcake. Pause. Bring a pill. Yeah, he's calling her on her bullshit. Would I like a cupcake? No, I just want to be included because apparently inclusion is all you fucking preach,

but you don't practice it, you fat, angry twat. He's the bad guy. Would you like a cupcake? I wish he was older. He said, would you like a parade because you were born a cunt lapper? Because you have one every year. Shut the fuck up.

Go back to Tijuana, whore. Can we put that out as a clip for the show? I'm dead serious. I fucking had it. She's angry because she doesn't fit into the mainstream. Okay, let her go. Woof. I'm just trying to be annoying.

You are annoying. You were very successful. Congratulations. Thanks. What a dip. All right. What? What?

Dip. Like a dipstick? Yeah. A butthead? A weasel? A weasel. Pain in my butt? All right, that's enough.

That's enough. I can't take it. My vagina's angry. It is. It's pissed off. It's lonely. My vagina is furious. It is.

Even women don't like it. Hit it, Bill. You are a cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt. A big fat sneaky cunt. Just cunt. Said ain't true, but I need to tell you. You're a motherfucking cunt. You are a cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt.

Motherfucking cunt. Not cute. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it.

Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it.

Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it.

Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it.

Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it.

Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it.

Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows it. Like a dipstick, you know, like what I use for a sex toy every Friday night when nobody calls me.

Fucking piece of garbage. We had to find that from Michelle Malkin, though. You wouldn't see that on. Can you imagine if that's a straight white woman talking to a gay fucking boy? You want a hot dog because you're a big girl, Billy? See the anger? She's not mad at Republicans. This isn't about politics.

She's mad at her maker, which was a man. And she doesn't like the way she came out because she doesn't fit into the mainstream. I don't give a fuck if you disagree with me or not because I lived in New York City. One of my favorite people in comedy is one of the angriest lesbians you'll ever meet, Judy Goh. But she's fucking hilarious.

I mean, she lets it rip. And she self-deprecates. She's angrier than I'll ever be. And she's about 6'2". She looks like gronk fucking lover um we actually hit it off when i moved to new york uh we hit it off like that because we i saw her she saw me on set we're like oh here's two fucking angry people and um you know but come on i'm just saying that should be all over the internet that should be on fucking in a perfect world on NBC Nightly News. Go and look at this.

Talk about sexism. Good for him. Did he sound like he was in sixth grade? Maybe he stayed back 11 times. Sounds like he was 36. Let me tell you something, bitch. I'd like a cupcake too. Stick that unicorn up your ass, yo.

Angry, angry people. Yet they're called gay, which is hilarious. They should be called gangry. Angry. And gay. Oh, yeah. You don't believe me? I'll show you another angry fag.

Angry why? Because he's a fag. I watched this and I was like, oh, right away I could tell he was too manicured, beautiful beard, haircut and shit. I'm like, oh, I see, I see. I didn't know definitely but This guy's name is Brian. Please give me cock. Kendall. I suck cock, and I love it. Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy. Sims.

He's a Democratic member of the Pennsylvania House of Goo Gobblers, no, of Representatives in the 182nd District, elected in 2012 after he blew half the House, no, elected in 2012. Sims is also a lawyer and an act- yuck, and an activist, guess what, on LGBT civil rights. Sims is the first openly gay elected state legislature in Pennsylvania history. And after you see the clip, you'll understand why we didn't let him in before that. He won reelection on November 6, 2018. Yeah, sure he did. But listen to him pop off, not only be racist and sexist and generalizing and stereotypes,

everything these fuckers hate, he's spewing it all at once, he's, this is Pennsylvania, and when he refers to an all-white party, he's talking about the Republican side of the house, or whatever, but he's just another thing that's wrong with this country, I don't mean to paint with a broad brush. I can't find the fucking... Oh, here we go. Let her roll. I was diagnosed with something called a...

That's him! No, I'm kidding. That's my wedding song. This legislation is just one more ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a- percent white in a chamber that is 70 percent male oh your booze means nothing that's enough your booze mean nothing to me i've seen who you cheer for the gentleman will suspend all right his vagina is angry he's a fag oh boy see him shut right up that's how i know he was gay when the guy said, that's enough, and he went, meow. Can you imagine this party 100% male,

100% white, 70% male? Can you fucking imagine? Again, these should have been reverse the genders, or reverse the races, just picture a straight fucking white guy saying that to the black caucus, you're 100% black, aren't you, again, angry, angry, angry, and again, I gotta again, I'm so cynical now. After November 3rd, I don't believe any of these people were fucking elected. I don't know when the last fucking election

wasn't crooked at any level, state, local, because I see some of the people that are so-called sitting on school councils and boards and state senators some of the people that are so-called sitting on school councils and boards and, you know, state senators and state reps, I look at them and hear them, I go, nobody, Ilhan Omar, you're going to tell me somebody voted that fucking twat in. I just don't believe it. Don't believe it for a second. But this guy's angry too, just like the teacher. He's angry too. He doesn't understand. I should like pussy. I just

don't. But you know what? That'll make even angrier. Stay where you are. What? You heard me. Let's go to New England, which used to be a great, great section of the country to grow up in before Massachusetts turned into this left-wing shithole, and it's metastasizing the politics, spreading into all parts of New England. Just like the Red Sox fans, they branch out into Vermont, New Hampshire, Maine, Rhode Island. It's just a hideous left-wing, ugh, New Hampshire, great state, too. I'll still go there and canoe and take a dump in the woods.

But apparently they've lost their shit. Again, this is going national now, all this left-wing propaganda in school. Where do you hear this one? This one even for today's standards. New Hampshire school brands, not literally, almost though, students at prom. The scarlet V for vaccine. Exeter High School officials wrote in marker on the hands of students who didn't have a coronavirus vaccine or didn't have a second shot. The school said it was for contact tracing. And that's what Hitler said when he put fucking yellow stars on gay people and pink clovers and yellow moons. It's for contact tracing.

Prompting a social media outcry. Really? So finally, somebody woke up? Despise it with every fiber of my being. Students who are unable to provide a vaccination card because they did not have or share a card or had not completed the full vaccination process had a number written on their hand.

Wow, that's a... You didn't fucking... You didn't, you know what, make it a tattoo? They had a number. Where have we heard this before? They had a number written on their hand, read a statement from the high school that outlined safety protocols for the prom. Where did they get this idea? The History Channel, I'm guessing. for the prom. Where did they get this idea? The History Channel, I'm guessing.

Translation, the Moderna virus is completely safe. Give it to your babies. Under the contract tracing section of the site, it reads, because we are allowing students to dance. Oh, now we're into footloose territory. We're allowing them to dance. It is not the expectation that students will social distance while dancing. Can you imagine this, how far they are into your life, government? There are three dance floors, one for the Jews, one the Polacks, one. There are three dance floors, and students who are on each floor will be recorded at regular interval. These people have gone mad with power. Isn't the fucking, isn't it over? The big pandemic that you could wipe out with hand gel?

The big, isn't it over? I'm watching baseball again this weekend. Or hockey. Stadium packed to the rafters. Not a mass there, but the coaches in the dugouts have mass. Somebody look me in the eye and fucking explain that to me. These teachers, you don't think they're having a ball? You fucking people are just evil.

It is suggested that the students rotate dance floors in order to avoid close contact with other students. I don't even... The prom attendee list did not include the numbers assigned to the students and only one set of cards with that information exists for tracking purposes. The school said the cards will be destroyed in the next few days. How fucking dare you?

How dare you? I'm going to find out what the hell happens here. You better. They made a deal. They said, you get a vaccination. I said, sure, sure. Rotating dance floor. Actually putting a scarlet letter on their foot.

Can you imagine? Where are you parents? You sit home, nodding, going, well, it's there for protection. Fucking housewives. Surprised they didn't brand them like they really, you know, like cattle. That's still going on, huh? I'm still waiting for me to be questioned at the airport or something. I just feel it's coming, even though we all know this is a fucking hoax.

Oh, boy, do I miss my coffee. Some more Corona story. On a lighter note, we've covered this subject matter a little bit, but some strip clubs, get this, they're offering coronavirus free lap dances as opposed to what? Are you kidding me? Coronavirus free lap dances. As opposed to what? Do they have some strippers that are like Chinese that worked at the Wuhan lab? Obese, come out in a G-string, rub their ass in your face. These are coronavirus free lap dances. I wouldn't even, I'd lick the pole.

I used to. I'd jump up on stage and lick the pole, and the bouncers would carry me up. Dancers might also be required to wear masks. So you can see their shrub and their ass crack and their beautiful tits. But cover that face. I wouldn't be worried about coronavirus at a strip club. There's about 19 other germs I'd be worried about, even though I'll still eat from that salad bar.

Gentlemen, I'm telling you, the best piece of salmon I ever had was at a strip club in New York. Hustler Strip Club. Best piece of... My buddy ran the fucking door. My buddy Goomba Johnny. And had one of the best meals ever. They actually took the food more seriously.

It's only in New York, and they have like an Italian chef. Gentlemen's clubs are taking measures to protect guests as the country reopens and so do their employees' legs. You know, ladies and gentlemen. But are they enough to strip away their customers' fears? Well, then the customers are pussies. The nation's strip clubs as largely, listen to this, they consider them non-essential

businesses. They consider them non-essential businesses. They were forced to close or rethink their operations after the coronavirus health crisis began to grip the nation earlier this year. But while some found new ways to keep workers employed, like the one in Portland that pivoted to food delivery. Oh, my God. That's dangerous for the girls, isn't it? And drive-thru pole dances.

Jesus, I would have flew to Portland just to try that. Drive-thru pole dances. Hilarious. Yeah, can I get more napkins? You know what I'm saying? Most were completely devastated by the shutdown. They had drive-thru. You know what I'm saying? Most were completely devastated by the shutdown. They had drive-through. You know what?

Hot dogs. Get your hot dogs here. Help us, Lordy. We went to zero cash flow within a matter of weeks. Coming from a period when business was doing extremely well, said Ryan Carlson, the director of operations at Deja Vu Services, Inc., a Las Vegas-based company that operates roughly 200 strip clubs in 40 states and six countries, and I've been to one numerous times in Montreal. Deja Vu, every time we went up there to do the Montreal Comedy Festival, that's the first thing you heard. Bartender, where do you got to go to Deja Vu, every time we went up there to do the Montreal Comedy Festival, that's the first thing you heard.

Bartender, where do you got to go to Deja Vu? And boy, were they right. Holy moly. Get your laughs and get your shots as you're leaving the country. He says, from a business standpoint, this was devastating, not just due to the immediate lack of cash flow, but the inability to continue paying our teams. Oh, they're teams now. Who's batting fourth tonight at fucking Club Gold? Our teams that are the lifeblood of our business.

They call them teams. Just like now businesses call customers guests. Entertainers suffer just as much because of sex worker discrimination by all levels of government, as much because of sex worker discrimination by all levels of government he said in many cases dances were prohibited from participating in government aid programs that I'm sorry but that's unfair why not I'm beautiful I think wait a minute that's not fair I'm not just saying that because I'm a fucking male. Straight. How is that not a job? I mean, anyways.

In New York, the manager of New York City's two Flash Dancers locations estimated the loss of potential income to be somewhere in the seven-figure range. The guy said it would have been worse if Flash Dancers didn't own the real estate that houses its clubs. But unlike New York clubs, however, some of Deja Vu's locations in a handful of states, including California, Arizona, Texas, and Florida, have been able to reopen, Carlson said. The management at those clubs is also aggressively implementing, here's where I get sad, it's just, implementing enhanced safety procedures. Remember how we turned sex after AIDS into the most dangerous thing you could do? So tired, you'd always hear the word fucking risk and safe,

and like you're jumping out of a plane. While we do not require guests to wear masks, we strongly encourage that practice and do provide complimentary masks, said Carlson. Some states require additional procedures of which Deja Vu's clubs consistently comply, and yet social distancing protocol doesn't extend to the club's lap dances. Of course it doesn't. At least not in states that have outright forbidden them via mandated COVID-19 guidelines. Lap dances will always exist until the end of time, Mr. Carlson said. And he's so goddamn right.

Who said the practice largely continues as normal in states with no restrictions against it. The government cannot easily or rightfully prohibit two consenting individuals from engaging in a lawful business transit. You want to make a bet? Ask Trump. Anyways, they're right in there, huh? Interfering with everything. It's a lap dance, for the love of God.

The fucking pandemic's over. Christy. What? Get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole. Why's that? Well, we had it fucking power washed eight times. To that end, one of Deja Vu's clubs in Las Vegas, Little Darlings, is advertising coronavirus-free lap dances to law customers,

which, as Carlson explains, are just normal lap dances, albeit performed by dancers that have undergone a temperature check. I was kind of hoping you were doing this all the time before the pandemic. Temperature checks upon arriving at work. And you know those are anal thermometers. The club also jokingly teases nude hand sanitizer wrestling. Performed in normal lubricant, not in hand sanitizer, as part of its efforts to regain clientele.

Well, you know what? I'm sure the pandemic did hurt their business, but there's some strip clubs that that just um they just suck i mean you some of the strippers shouldn't even be on well here's one i went to in oklahoma oh no she pregnant it makes me pregnant Let Mitch be pregnant. You never looked heavier. You never looked heavier.

Did you see a little kid's hand stick out and grab a five? I thought I did. The broad's pregnant, but the funniest part of that clip is the guy on the microphone at the strip club. He goes, how are baby going to eat? I love our country. That's what makes America great and horrible at the same time. Oh, my God. You've got to give her credit, man.

She's out there working. She ain't sitting home. Kind of makes those broads look like pussies, right? The maternity leave stuff. They work in an office somewhere. I can't come in, I'm a month pregnant, and I'm throwing up, and this broad's like, I don't know, I'm fucking three minutes away from giving birth, and I'm fucking twerking, yo. God bless the blacks and the whites and the Chinese and the Indians.

Nobody else. the blacks and the whites and the Chinese and the Indians nobody else what from titty bars to teaching kids about titty I think we did a story last week or the week before covering a Dalton teacher remember Dalton's a $55,000 a year private school that you send your youngsters to in New York, and it's like one of the, you know, used to be one of the most respected. Dalton teacher, we talked about this broad, fang chang fing wang yin dang now. Dalton teacher told to beat it after teaching first graders how to beat it. That was my headline. A teacher who taught

controversial sex education classes that included cartoon videos on masturbation for first graders at the posh dalton school has resigned the post has learned well good bye bye dickhead justin ang font who was also there she is there he is there she is, there he is, there it is, Justin Angfont, who was also taught a one-day workshop on porn literacy to juniors at Columbia Grammar and Prep School last month that angered some parents, will not return to the school next year, according to an email Dalton's head of school, Jim Best, sent to Parents Friday. Best, oh, look at this spineless cheese dick. Best also will not be returning to Dalton next year. Oh, throughout, this is him talking, throughout her tenure at Dalton,

Justin Ang Font has helped to develop an exemplary K-12 health and wellness program. Our faculty, our staff, administration, and trustees continue to stand firmly behind this program, and those who teach it best wrote, which is disturbing, You need to shut the fuck up. At faculty and staff meetings this week, Justin or Justine announced her decision to leave Dalton to focus on her work as an independent health educator. Yeah, that's why.

She's been working. This is what they always do. Somebody gets canned. These fuckers can't even own up to it. She's been working towards this goal for over a year now. So we knew she was going. It just happened to coincide with a controversial cartoon that she put up that was totally inappropriate, and this

school fucking caught a ton of shit. But, you know, those are coincidences. That's why, you know. Anyways, we support Justine's aspirations and look forward to honoring her accomplishments as the academic year comes to a close. Can you imagine?

We know she's gone because the parents went shithouse. Okay? And this dick can't even admit it. Font is the third, listen to this, high-profile Dalton staffer to leave the school this year. Maybe it's not working, huh, staffers? As the school struggles with simmering conflict between the faculty and parents over its progressive agenda. Oh, is this what progressive is? Dominic Rollins, the school's director. Oh, gay fella. That's him looking at a pair of shoes in a window. Dominic Rollins, the school's director of DEI. You know what that is, kids? That's right, diversity, equity, and inclusion.

Left in February to pursue other opportunities. The school said he was going to do that anyway. So he left back in February. Best, that's Jim Best, Dalton's headmaster. Good name for him. For the past three years, who's been with the school a total of 16 years, announced in April he was resigning to pursue other exciting and inspiring opportunities, like polluting kids' minds elsewhere. So let me get this straight. They're all leaving about the

same time, right after you implement this radical program. Just a coincidence, I guess. One parent said Friday she was not impressed with the school's statement. This lady hits it right on the head about font. She says, this inability to admit a mistake or acknowledge a misstep is strange, she said. She nails it. It shows a real lack of emotional intelligence

and self-awareness on behalf of the leadership team. Exactly. You are correct or it's Quentin would say it appears one thing your college boys are not a bit when you're wrong last fall Dalton parents who pay 55 grand per year for their kids tuition learned that first graders were being taught sex ed lessons that included cartoons showing little kids talking about touching themselves. There's people that do that for them.

They're called psycho sickos. Anyways, we showed you this cartoon, but this is what these parents' first graders were being exposed to, thanks to font. How come my penis gets big sometimes and points up in the air? That's called an erection. I've never seen one. Sometimes I touch my penis because it feels good.

Me too. Sometimes when I'm in my bath or when mom puts me to bed, I like to touch my vulva too. Me too. That's appropriate for five and six-year-olds, don't you think? You people on the left, you evil fucks get out of the country we're eventually going to slaughter you people it's all going down even the mass things read the history making people wear masks it dehumanizes them and shit it's been going on for hundreds and hundreds of years and there's going to be a real slaughter i'm on the side with the people who have all the guns

and who like this country. You fuckers. Didn't Stalin murder all the fucking intellectuals first and the so-called elites? You know, Dalton teacher. Here he comes. Walking down the

street. It really is. It's a shame. It's a crying shame. Speaking of good schools and liberals and people who really have done the world no good, the Clinton crime family allegedly rubs out another possible threat.

Do you hear about this? A passionate Alabama TV anchor and former college Alabama football player who broke the infamous Bill Clinton tarmac meeting with then Attorney General Loretta, I hate white people, Lynch. Guess what? He died Saturday,

according to reports, and his employer. So, look, we don't know, but... I'll make that into something. Christopher Sign. That's weird, his last name. It's a sign. 45 was found dead Saturday morning by Hoover Police

in his Scout Terrace home, according to the L.com. The death is being investigated as a suicide, like many deaths when it's 12 degrees to the Clintons. Hoover Lieutenant Keith Sezleskba said, according to the outlet, again, he's the one who broke the big Clinton story and wrote a book about it. Never tell anybody outside the family what you're thinking again.

Never tell anybody outside the Clinton White House what you're thinking again. Bill even sounds like a... It's like a Bob Sears. Get that, boys. I don't know. This guy won't go away. This guy in Alabama. I'm telling you.

He wrote the goddamn book. I was going to whack him after the article, but this guy hasn't learned a lesson. Get Podesta on the phone. We've got to send somebody out there. Chris, again, this is alleged. I'm just speculating. So is the whole world, I guess, you know. Chris was a tremendous leader in our newsroom,

wrote ABC 3340 on Saturday in tribute. Sign had three boys with his life, Laura, according to the local ABC affiliate. The Dallas area native had, in 2017, Laura, according to the local ABC affiliate. The Dallas area native had, in 2017, returned to Alabama to anchor the ABC station's evening news show after working for a TV station in Phoenix. While there, Sine broke the major 2016 presidential campaign news that former President Clinton, in June 2016, met at Sky Harbor Airport with Lynch while the Attorney General was investigating former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's use of a private email server.

Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane! Everybody strap in! Sign who played offensive lineman, Jesus, alabama that's a bad dude in the 1990s wrote a book about the encounter named secret on the tarmac oh my god he's gone and we couldn't do nothing about it yeah exactly nothing to see here freeze this purse nothing now the reason this brings up a lot of people are raising eyebrows, you guys know that the Clintons have had this, and again, we don't know. We kind of do, but we don't. This is speculation.

I don't want to get whacked. Leave it here. But here's some of the people who had relationships with the Clintons that ended up dead. A little list for you. I'll go as fast as I can. James McDougal, Clinton's convicted whitewater partner, died of an apparent heart attack while in solitary confinement. He was a key witness in Ken Starr's investigation. Mary Mahoney, a former White House intern, was murdered

July 1997 at a Starbucks coffee shop in Georgetown. That's right in Washington, D.C. The murder happened just after she was to go public with her story of sexual harassment in the White House. Vince Foster, number three, former White House counselor and colleague of Hillary Clinton at Little Rock's Rose Law Firm, died of a gunshot wound to the head, ruled the suicide. Four, Ron Brown, Secretary of Commerce and former DNC chairman, reported to have died, I remember this, on a plane, by impact in a plane crash. Listen to this. A pathologist close to the investigation reported that there was a hole in the top of Brown's skull resembling a gunshot wound at the time of his death. Brown

was being investigated and spoke publicly of his willingness to cut a deal with prosecutors. The rest of the people on the plane also died. A few days later, the air traffic controller committed suicide. Huh? C. Victor Reiser II, Reiser, a major player in the Clinton fundraising organization, died in a private plane crash, 1992 of July. Paul Tully, DNC committee political director, found dead in a hotel room in Little Rock, September 1992,

described by Clinton as a dear friend and trusted advisor. Ed Willey, Clinton fundraiser, found dead November 1993, deep in the woods in Virginia of a gunshot wound to the head, ruled a suicide. Ed Willey died on the same day his wife Kathleen Willey claimed Bill Clinton groped her in the Oval Office in the White House. Ed Willey was involved in several Clinton fundraising events. Nothing to see here. Eight, Jerry Parks, head of Clinton's gubernatorial security team in Little Rock, gunned down in his car at a deserted intersection outside Little Rock.

Parks' son said his father was building a dossier on Clinton. He allegedly threatened to reveal this information. After he died, the files were mysteriously removed from his house. Nine, James Bunch died from a gunshot suicide. It was reported that he had a black book of people which contained names of influential people who visited prostitutes in Texas and Arkansas. Ten, James Wilson was found dead in May 1993 from an apparent hanging suicide. He was reported to have ties to Whitewater.

That's enough. One more. Kathy Ferguson, ex-wife of Arkansas trooper Danny Ferguson, was found dead in May 1994 in her living room with a gunshot to her head. It was ruled a suicide, even though there were several packed suitcases, as if she was going somewhere. Danny Ferguson was a co-defendant, along with Bill Clinton, in the Paula Jones lawsuit.

Kathy Ferguson was a possible corroborating witness for Paula Jones. And listen, there's a total of 43 names on this list with similar stories. Again, allegations. But you've got to admit, you don't have to be, you know. I'm trying to think of another reference other than Quincy back in the 70s to see that pattern. Anyways, that is it for today, ladies and gentlemen. Good to be back on a Monday. Probably going to be a,

well, it is going to be a short week because I got to go to Dallas on Wednesday. I don't know if I'm doing, probably doing a show Wednesday morning before I get on the plane because that's what I do. Never mention the other thing I said at the White House the other day.

I want to thank you guys again. Don't forget thecomicsgym.com. Don't forget nickdip.com, my website. Don't forget cameo.com. If you want me to roast a friend or relative, go to cameo.com, tell me about the person. I will make a video

on my phone sending it to that person to either make or break their day. It's a lot of fun. People love doing it. That is it. You guys think it. I will say you're very welcome. We'll see you back here tomorrow at the exact same time. Have a good day, everybody. guitar solo Outro Music