The Nick DiPaolo Show - NBC News Lies Again | Nick Di Paolo Show #1480

Episode Date: November 9, 2023

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about NBC lying, Hamas tunnels and more! Support our sponsor, Displate! Head to https://displate.com/nickdipaolo?art=6526d4071e9f8 and use code NICKDIP to get Displates up to 30% off.   Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

🎵 Can I be happier? Yeah. Yeah. Who couldn't? How are you, folks? Welcome to the show on a Thursday. Good to be with you. I want to thank people for pretending to vote in. Joe Biden, the worst president any country's ever seen, ever, period, bar none. If you think that's biased, go fuck your sister. Just a loser. He was a loser when he had his marbles. He's a loser now.

He always will be a loser. And you people, again, I'm talking to most of my fans. But let's say there's a couple stragglers who tuned in by accident. You fucking ruined the world. I don't like you. Quiet. Quiet like a bitch. All right, I will.

The hell was that about? How dare you talk to me in that manner? What's going on? It's just all kinds of horse shit. Let's start off with something called Treacherous Tunnels. First story. Excuse me. By the way, big treat for you in the second half of the show.

I'm going to put on a bra and hit wiffle balls. I'm being blown out of Dallas's ass. The mammoth spider web of underground tunnels. You know, you know how rats, rats tunnel underground and shit. I think that's a coincidence. Underground tunnels used by Hamas to shuttle militants, hostages, and weapons around beneath Gaza Strip is something, excuse me, we cannot even pause. Go ahead. Three, two, one. Is something that we cannot even imagine. According to Fowder creator Avi Isgaroff, as you know, I told you guys about the show Fowder. And I think they're going to do more. I hope so.

Izgarov is an Arabic-speaking Israeli journalist and former member of an ultra-elite Israeli Defense Force unit who co-wrote the award-winning Yes Network. Fucking that's a Yankees network. The Yes Network hit Fauda, F-A-U-D-A. You guys have to watch this. It means chaos, I think, in Arabic, actually. Visited Gaza a number of times before Hamas took over the territory in 2007. He said the latticework, meaning the tunnels, extends underneath the entire length of the 140 square mile Gaza Strip

and gives Hamas the ability to launch swift Viet Cong style hit and run attacks on the invading Israeli forces. Like I said, very dense like my wife says Izzy. Izzy. It's very dense it's a huge system of tunnels that allows Hamas to transport terrorists and hostages, but also motorbikes, artillery, rockets, everything you can imagine. It's an underground world. Look at that. this is when they gave the Gaza Strip to them, or whatever, cleared out for a while. Again, I can't help but picture that gopher in Caddyshack being chased down with a fireball. He added that those tunnels are exactly where Hamas members fled after the October 7th attack,

which is when they launched rockets into Israel. Just to remind you idiots who forgot how this started and who believe that you can get sucker punched in the face. And then when you go to punch somebody back, a third party can jump in and go, wait a minute, no, no, no. And again, it's no coincidence those people that believe in that are lefty type people, probably never get punched in the face in their life for the most part. They hate competitive sports. They hate anything like that. Anything that sniffs of alpha male. I swear to God, getting punched in the face is the best learning thing in life. When the doctor, when you're born, he shouldn't slap

you. I see punch you right in the face. You'd be much better off for it. You'll have a hair lip and a fucked up nose. Launch rockets into Israel and send gunmen across the fortified border to murder and kidnap Israeli civilians. Iskarov and Fowder co-creator, my boy, he's the star of the show, Lior Rez, that's him on the right, a healthy David Tell, set the third season of Netflix.

They set it, it's a stream show about Gaza. They set it in Gaza, even though it wasn't shot there, because Israelis have been barred from the land since the Jewish state withdrew its soldiers and settlers in 2005. Did you know that? They basically said, here, you can have this, and not enough. There's been three. I'm going to play that video that's like 18 minutes long. Not today, but I found a guy doing the history in about 20 minutes. And it's really informative if you want to, you know, it clears up a lot of stuff, in my opinion.

Somebody else will look at it and go, oh, bullshit. Anyways, when they cleared out in 2005, the Times of Israel said, which is, you know. Hates Jews. Hates Jews. I swear every kid in Gaza knows there's a Hamas headquarters under Shifa, but no one talks about it.

Issacharoff said, according to the Times of Israel. Shifa's the hospital, then that's what that image shows. Yeah, there's the image. The red is all the complex. That's right. That's the complex underneath the red, right, under the hospital?

The red is, yeah. Yeah. That's the hospital, right, area? Yeah. And they mention, I believe in Fado, they mention Shefa, you know. But, yeah, those red things are underground. Of a hospital, folks. That way, when Israel, you know.

And they won't let their own people leave. They use them as human shields. And it's Israelis who fucking hate Hamas, who want to kill innocent Palestinians? No. The jerk-offs are holding their own people hostage and using them as fucking shield at hospitals, schools, elementary school.

You know, they're good people. Here is a... I know I've been pushing Fowler, and a couple people have thanked me, by the way, online, because they watched it. Here is the trailer for i think season three just real quick but that's uh leo raz the real deal by the way he was in the alter group that

chased down in real life and then he becomes an actor and co-writes a show and stars in it and he was uh swartzenegger's bodyguard for a while. Check it. Here's the trailer for season three, anyways. Welcome to Gaza. There's unbelievable, and there's shoot-offs of that show. It just is good, I swear to God. And I'll say it again. What makes it awesome is you don't know the actors and actresses. You know, in your private Ryan, you can go, that's Tom Hanks. That's not Schmuck General or whatever the fuck.

But that's what makes it even more real, you don't know any of the actors and actresses, and there's some scary young Arab guys that, you know, you're like, Jesus, and I'll say it one more time, I know I'm promoting the show so much, it's more because what's going on today, but even Palestinian TV critics said it's great, because it shows, you know, Israelis doing shitty stuff too, but for a whole different reason, in my opinion. Anyways, I'm preaching to the choir here, but if you get a chance, I don't even know how many seasons there are. And if I could fucking had a memory, I could tell you what the other names of the spinoffs are that are so good. It's frigging crazy. Hey, in the second half of this show,

boys and girls, I'm going to be talking about, we'll cover a high school coach who got fired. He's an assistant high school coach at Jesuit school for slugging one of his own plays coming off the field. And yes, he had a helmet on and shit. But, you know, I'm old school, but no, that's not old school you're fucking if that was my kid you'd be in deep chat uh also a treat for you people i hope um as you know me and dallas did things a couple segments called uh nick's bitching kitchen that we put in the can for times like these when we'd need them and uh so in the second half of the show, I'm going to be showing you how to make pizza in using a pizza oven in my kitchen.

I think I have a different recipe now. Right? This was the first. Oh, but it still looks goddamn good. Oh, yeah. No, it's delicious. The one we're showing is Mario Batali dough. But I've since learned how to make New York dough.

Instead of a more Neapolitan, it comes out New York City thin and huge. Anyways, and hopefully you get some laughs while we're doing it. That's exclusively on Mug Club. So join now to get it. Where? At NickDip.com. Dot com. Sure.

Yeah, that's my boy. He was the best guy around. Yeah, Nick. Fucking nice guy. Hey, this holiday season, give your friends and family something that looks like you put a ton of effort into it when really it was so easy. And isn't that what we all try to do? I know I do if I have popsicle sticks I make my wife a gift just pick your friends favorite thing slap it on a disc plate and start the holidays off right

dis plates are metal posters that take just 20 seconds to install and won't damage your wall. Look at that one. Wow, I didn't even see that. That's Bill Hicks. They come with a magnet that you stick to the wall. Then the display sticks to the magnet. It is that easy.

They made one for me. I think it's of the logo, the DePaulo Show. It's supposed to show up today at like 5 or whatever. So I will bring it on the show when I get it. I don't even know what it looks like. But that's awesome. That's a great Hicks thing. They do great work. They've become very popular. With licensed

designs from brands like Star Wars and Stranger Things to gifts perfect for sports fans. Displate has what you need to make the season bright. Save up to 30% off when you click the link in the show description down below. Discount will be automatically applied to your cart

when you click the link. Or use code NickDip when you visit Displate.com. That's Displate.com use code nickdip when you visit displate.com that's displate.com code nickdip n-i-c-k-d-i-p or click the link in the description below thanks for being a sponsor displate hey boys and girls head over to nickdip.com to get exclusive hats t-shirts, hoodies, and more. It's yet another way for you to support the show and look sexy at the same time. You can also get signed copies of my previous specials and all of the Nicka shirts. Just go to nickdip.com and click on store. Again, that's nickdip.com, click on store. Thank you guys so much. See you soon. On to the next. NBC changes false

headline and gets caught lying as usual. And let me tell you something. I've said this a million times and I'm going to say it again. NBC, ABC, CBS, they're the worst. You know why? And I've said this because CNN, MSNBC, they don't try to hide what they are. They're just a propaganda machine, a fucking voice box for the administration. But NBC and CBS and ABC, they put on this front that they're impartial and they're giving you the fact. That's why they're fucking evil. Thank God nobody watches legacy network shit anymore. And because of this stuff, what do you think? This is the first time we did ABC. We because of this stuff, what do you think this is the first

time we did ABC? We caught doing this, all of them. NBC News altered a headline after Paul Kessler, a Jewish man, was killed following an altercation, in quotes, which I believe it should be in quotes, with pro-Palestinian protesters at a rally in California. Because what's more violent than a radical leftist from California or an activist or protester? Because they're deeply stupid. You know, we do West Coast stupid. They grab onto the shit, you know, and they don't have anything else to do with their life. Kessler was at a physical altercation, which, you know what, that's not even fair to say. I guarantee,

they said somebody hit him through a fucking blowhorn, megaphone, whatever you call it, hit him in the back of the head. That's what one witness said.

Was in a physical altercation with counter-protesters during which he fell backwards and struck his head on the ground, the Ventura County Sheriff's Department

said in a statement. So some Jew hater just, you know. Get this through your head, you Jew motherfucker, you. That's the poor bastard laying there bleeding. The statement explained that the Ventura County Medical Examiner's Office determined the cause of death to be blunt force head injury and the manner of death homicide. They said it right in the,

that was the first thing out of the coroner's report. Listen to the original headline from NBC News. They appeared to emphasize only that Kessler died after hitting his head. Here's the headline before they changed it. Man dies after hitting head during Israeli-Palestinian rallies in California, officials say. How many more times are you going to be lied to? And you people on the left, they're on your side.

And we've proven a billion times how much they fucking lie, yet you continue to believe what they tell you. I don't know what else to fuck you. You live in an alternate reality or whatever. The fuck? A man fell down and banged his head. You think it was a Palestinian pro-Hamas marcher

that banged his head? You think they might have mentioned it? A Jewish guy hit him? The updated headline gave the context that Kessler died after an altercation with protesters. Jewish man dies after hitting head in altercation at

dueling pro-Israel and pro-Palestinian rallies in California. The outlet failed to include a note for readers that the headline had been altered. The next day they fix it, but don't tell the readers that it had been altered. Outrage against the original headline spread quickly online. What is the headline? NBC News, somebody wrote, you can't claim you didn't have enough information because your own article cites the medical examiner calling it a homicide, noted a conservative ex-user, A.G. Hamilton,

29. Multiple onlookers dialed 911 but were unable to get through. I wonder why that is. Oh, defunding the police maybe? Including the alleged perpetrator, the man shared. The witness, this is not the guy, when they say perpetrator, this isn't the perpetrator talking now. The witness shared that Kessler was out but had moments where he lifted his head touched the back of his head and lifted his legs up the Jewish Federation of Greater Los Angeles wrote in a post on X Monday evening that the pro-Palestinian protester threw He's gone. And we couldn't do nothing about it. Okay? How many times are they going to lie to you?

And you just keep, you know, swallowing it whole. Because you don't care about the country. You care. You want to be right. You want to win the argument. That's all you're fucking interested in. And you're not going to do that either. Because the truth is, you know, just look at the polls anyways lately. Finally,

before the delicious pizza segment coming, violent coach, shit canned, an assistant high school football coach was fired after video footage showed him striking a player on the helmet during a game in Tampa, Florida on Friday, according to a statement from Reverend Richard Hermes. It's really Hermes. I know from the store. It was on the Sopranos. Tony gave Carmelo this real expensive jacket or sweater or something.

He goes, yeah, it's a Hermes. Richard Hermes, St. John's, the president of Jesuit high school. So the guy that did the slugging got shit canned. And he should, in my opinion. The male who was a part-time assistant, not even a full-time assistant, for the Jesuit high school football team was seen punching a defensive player wearing number 94

as he ran off the field and over to the sidelines in a video posted on X by former NFL player Kevin Hobbs, who currently serves as defensive coordinator for the Tampa Bay Tech high school team. I'm sure he did that because, you know, there was a racial component. He wouldn't miss that. But in this case, it happens to be right.

Let's take a look at this. Apparently, you know, he wasn't supposed to be out there. Made a mistake. Bang, right cross to the... How's your fist, by the way? How's your fist? This is so unnecessary. You fucking believe that?

What an asshole. Who the fuck do you think you are? Who do you think you are? Who the fuck? That doesn't sound like a black kid yelling at his coach. You believe that shit? And again, I'm old school.

You can grab him by the face mask and yell at him. I mean, but no, you don't do that. Same with Bobby Knight, who I loved. He went too far when he put his hands around the neck of a player. And then the best example ever,

which I say he didn't go too far because he was about 88 when he did it, Woody Hayes of Ohio State. You ever see this one, Dallas? They're playing Clemson in a fucking bowl game. I'll never forget it in the 80s, I think. And the game's basically over. Clemson guy picks off a pass to end the game, kind of runs out of bounds on Ohio State.

Fucking Woody Hayes comes running up, grabs him by the mask and starts slugging him. I don't get the logic behind punching anybody that's wearing a helmet. With a helmet on. Yeah, no. You know. Go for the gut or the balls. Right? The assistant coach whose name was not reported.

Why not? Get it out there. Oh, because we're in the middle of an investigation. Shut up. Was informed in a meeting with the school that he will no longer be coaching Jesuit football or assisting the school at any other capacity. He won't be doing first communions and baptisms, which contradicts what the school stands for. unions and baptisms, which contradicts what the school stands for. Jesuit head coach Matt Thompson said that the matter is being addressed when initially asked about the incident Saturday night, according to the Tampa Bay Times. The president of the high school, Richard Hermes, said this.

This behavior contradicts what the school stands for and is completely contrary to the expectations we have for coaches, moderators, and faculty members who are to be role models for our students and mentors in their development as young men with tight, firm asses. What? No. That was the statement. And I believe that was a no-brainer punch a kid like that god damn it I bet you he gets a visit from that play's brothers that's what I'm saying uh okay I forgot to tell you that for those of you on mug club stick around right now uh for the second half of the show. I teased it earlier.

Everyone else, go to nickdip.com and join to get my full show so you can see this me cooking pizza at my house. Stephen Crowder's full show and a whole lot more. You know his lineup. So, yes. Here comes a

segment called Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen. Enjoy enjoy it i hope you do guitar solo Outro Music