The Nick DiPaolo Show - Newsom's Reparations Wet Dream | Nick Di Paolo Show #1317

Episode Date: December 6, 2022

Newsom's Reparations for CA Black Thief Kills Home Depot Employee Trudeau Adding More Guns to Ban List Cop Trainee Shoots Partner Goblin Mode Girls B-Ball Fight Today’s show is sponsored by Relief B...and: Go to https://Reliefband.com and use promo code NICKDIP to support the show and receive 20% off your order plus free shipping! Money back guarantee!

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Boys and girls, make sure to follow me on Rumble, whatever the hell that is. We are posting the show there now, too, so enjoy. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:00:36 Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, Mr. DiPaolo, I'm really proud of you. Now go home and get your fucking shine box. Gee, Bob. Hey, Bob. By the way, he's on the death list, I would think. Kirstie Alley. Bye-bye. Too bad.
Starting point is 00:01:02 Seemed like a cool chick. I think she would have been fun to hang out with. She was into Scientology for a little while, but I think she got... By the way, I said to my wife, maybe I should have got into that shit. Yeah, it really turned out bad for Tom Cruise and whoever else. She's like, what are you kidding me? It's evil. I go, so are you. You can't stop me from fucking hanging out with you for 40 years, you motherfucker. I didn't say that.
Starting point is 00:01:25 Anyhow, Kirstie and I go bye-bye. And what else? Boston Bruins. Real quick update for you folks that are from my neck of the woods. They lost their first game at home since the season started, and it was in a shootout, which, again, they were down 3-0 to Vegas, who's a very good hockey team, and came back and tied it, and then we lost it
Starting point is 00:01:48 in a shootout. Anyways, still got a point out of it. But what made me shit my pants is the New Jersey Devils even have a point on us. The fuck did they become good? They must have come out of the blocks like gangbusters too. We still have the highest winning percentage. At least we did last night. I know you don't give a fuck
Starting point is 00:02:04 about this, but I'm killing time. I don't want to do this anymore. And Tom Brady is, he's the goat of goats. There's no more, like Aikman said last night, no, there's no more discussion. He said that was over a long time ago and now he's just piling on. Fuck. He gets the ball. They're down by 13 in the fourth quarter with about half a quarter left. I'm like, he's got them right where the fuck he wants them. And sure enough, Saints, you know, who had been moving, the Saints were good last night, moving the ball, great defense.
Starting point is 00:02:35 All of a sudden, they had a four and out, three and out, whatever the fuck, nine and out. What am I, gay? I don't know. And at the wrong time, they hand it back to Brady. Now they're down by six with about a minute left or less. Ding, bang, boom. Bing, bong, bang. It turns all the players on his team better
Starting point is 00:02:53 because they know they got a shot with Jesus, the quarterback. And it takes the life out of the defense because they know they don't have a shot. All of a sudden, he throws these. And there were a couple passes that should have been caught earlier in the game. Well, how about that one in the end zone where he's running backwards and then still lobs it up and gives him plenty of lead time? Yes.
Starting point is 00:03:12 Yes. And let me tell you, if I see this one more time, luckily I'm not a gambler anymore. I don't put big money on games. If I see one more receiver trying to get on SportsCenter with a one-handed catch, guy did it last night. Guy, they could have put him away. They would have went up by whatever.
Starting point is 00:03:31 They would have went up by 20. Guy for the Saints. Gall throws a beautiful pass. He's pretending to fight the defensive back with his hand. But he's got plenty of time to do this. But he doesn't. He tries this. And I've heard guys in SportsCenter talk about it.
Starting point is 00:03:49 They're trying to fucking do an Odell, but there was no reason not to go up with two hands. Again, I wonder if the coaches even addressed that shit. Quit fucking hot-dogging it. We've become so used to that shit. And nobody has the balls to tell anybody, you know. I was fucking steaming. Anyways, I had them in three and a half, so I to that shit. And nobody has the balls to tell anybody, you know. I was fucking steaming. Anyways, I had them in three and a half, so I came out good.
Starting point is 00:04:09 But that goddamn Brady, what in God's name? And he looks, he's skinnier than ever. I think the stress of the fucking family shit is, I mean, is eating him. He looks like a fucking male model now. He's all sunken in. Not that he was ever ugly. Jesus Christ. Anyways, that guy, and I love to hear guys like Aikman, who was no fucking, he was no, you know, shitbag himself.
Starting point is 00:04:35 He's like, this guy is just whatever. All right, did I bore you? Let me talk about my vagina that's flourishing with yeast. All right, let's get right to it. On-air convulsion. This was a little clip. You know how I am. It's nothing I find funnier than a medical emergency's on-air live. Basketball game. I didn't care who, whatever. It doesn't matter because I don't watch the NBA. But the guy on the right is the color commentary guy, no pun intended. That came out horribly.
Starting point is 00:05:09 Probably an ex-NBA guy. I'm just not a fan of NBA. And then you get Dracula on the left. And the guy on the left is going to go into convulsions. Well, the black guy's talking. Let's take a look, shall we? That's pretty amazing. And you said it right. Well, the black guy's talking. Let's take a look, shall we? Ow.
Starting point is 00:05:26 That's pretty amazing. And you said it right. Poise for a kid this young, 19 years old, come out on the floor each and every night. And he feels like he's belonged. So I look for this kid to have a really good first half of the season. Ow. That's pretty amazing. And you said it right.
Starting point is 00:05:46 Poise for a kid this young, 19 years old, come out on the floor each and every night, and he feels like he's belonged. Way too much. I look for this kid to have a really good first half of the season. Don't even tell me. How do you not laugh? I guess if you're there, you might panic a little, but see, that's where I'm different and comedians are different would have been going oh dude cut it out
Starting point is 00:06:07 you think he's fucking around but here's the kicker of this thing they said oh he was dehydrated oh is that what happens you go into convulsions that could kill you if you don't have a sprite what the fuck is that what if you looked over here Dallas
Starting point is 00:06:24 drink some more water drink more water you'll be fine before they should, what the fuck is that? What if you looked over here, Dallas? Huh? Yeah, drink more water, you'll be fine. Now, Dallas would go, I'm going to get a coffee. He'd stare at that. I'll be right back. Oh, I left my something in the car. Holy moly.
Starting point is 00:06:40 We were going to show the fucking Ron Paul thing, but we'll give it a break today. But you know how much I love that. It's like porn for me. Especially that guy going, uh, Dr. Paul? I mean, somebody get Dr. Paul, Doc. Anyways, that guy had a convulsion because
Starting point is 00:06:53 he didn't drink enough water. This is what I put. And you put it in the teleprompter. I sent it to Dallas. This has to go somewhere. Guy has convulsion on air. I sent it to Dallas. This has to go somewhere.
Starting point is 00:07:04 Guy has convulsion on air. Anyhow, I thought that was terrific. I'm going to get this tooth jammed in there because the hole is starting to hurt. That can't be good. Anyways, let's move on to the dumbest state in the union. As you know, I've coined the phrase West Coast stupid because there is nothing stupider than West Coast. I noticed it, I'd say, two days after I moved to LA. They were just a little slow on the uptake. Good people. But anyways, I just went over the headline. What am I calling it, Dallas? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:07:46 California Dreaming. California Dreaming again. Black residents, that's the story. Good night, everybody. Of California could receive, look at them doing, $223,200 each in reparation payments in their wet dream. Once they receive it, their alarm will go off and they'll get up and go to work. According to an estimate by the state's reparations task, oh, you got a reparations task force, do you?
Starting point is 00:08:12 Meanwhile, your fourth grade is reading at a fucking retarded level. High schoolers can't speak English. Crime's through the roof. But you make sure. You make sure that Kunta Kinte's fucking grandmother, who's great, great, great, whatever. Get the fuck out of here with that. Reparations Task Force. You know what this does? This just puts a
Starting point is 00:08:31 deeper divide. It's a racial scab that they keep picking at until we start shooting each other. Never gonna fucking happen. Not even in California, Newsom. Reparations Task Force, reported by the New York Times, I'm sure. I'm black, y'all, and I'm black, y'all, and I'm blacker than black.
Starting point is 00:08:49 Well, I am now. Send me my check. The nine-member task force, nine members to decide this, also known as the LA Lakers in their backup, authorized by Democrat Governor Ship-Shafter, Shape-Shifter, Ship-Shafter, Ship-Shafter. Look at this evil fucking, this guy is right out of Sesame Street. Yeah, he should be popping out of a garbage can with a Dracula face. Look at this guy. Place a giant cock in those two hands, he'd be happy. Governor Newsom, a real evil son of a bitch, recommended
Starting point is 00:09:25 $569 billion with a B. But like I said, then they factored in stolen radios and bikes. It's down $100. They owe us $100. Nick, that's true. I'm only kidding, black folks. You know I love you.
Starting point is 00:09:42 $560 billion total in reparations for black residents due to the effects of housing discrimination. Yeah, that happened I love you. $560 billion total in reparations for black residents due to the effects of housing discrimination. Yeah, that happened 40 years ago. Though the number could increase before the final recommendations are due June 2023. No, they won't. I can't wait to see the Civil War break out.
Starting point is 00:10:00 You think Mexicans are going to pay for this shit? Huh? Or any other of the 19,000 different ethnicities that have nothing to do with this shit, living in that shithole, according to the New York Times. Currently, 6.5% of California's population, or 2.5 mil, identify as black. That's going to go up to 10 mil.
Starting point is 00:10:20 Break out the shoe polish. They identify as black or African American or, you know. Wake up, white people. We are looking at reparations on a scale that is the largest since Reconstruction, said Jovan Scott Lewis, a defensive back for the Denver Broncos, a professor at the University of California, Berkeley. You're entitled to shit. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:10:49 And member of the task force, according to the New York Times. That is why we must put forward a robust plan with plenty of options. There's black people who fucking laugh at this. Do you understand? Not too many, but a few. To be eligible for reparations,
Starting point is 00:11:06 one must be a descendant of Wilt Chamberlain, which is a lot, enslaved African Americans, a free black person, living in the United States prior to the end of the 19th century. Wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:11:22 We're in the 21st century. Oh, I get it. Yeah, that that's great you hand it down to whatever the nightmare of uh an amount of money spent trying to figure out and trace that with each person yeah it's not gonna happen no exactly what are y'all gonna do with 23 of me fucking albino people going yo i, I'm one one thousandth black. The main areas identified by the task force for reparations were housing discrimination, mass incarceration,
Starting point is 00:11:54 unjust property seizures. How are you going to prove all this? This is a wet dream. Does he really believe it? Or is this just how he gets votes from libs? He can't believe this, right? Does he? Devaluation of black businesses in health care.
Starting point is 00:12:11 Yet the estimated $569 billion or $223 per person only addresses housing discrimination between 1933 to 1977. Oh, boy, you. Except, well, how about when the fucking market crashed in 2008 and they were bundling those loans together that we ended up paying for, that were for minorities, by the way, giving them fucking,
Starting point is 00:12:39 letting them buy half-million-dollar houses with nothing down. In September, Newsom vetoed a bill by the task force that requested the recommendations not be due until 2024. In March, the task force released a 500-word report outlining why the descendants of slaves should receive recommendations, and the task force is scheduled to meet again in mid-December. Jesus Christ, I gave you a long story.
Starting point is 00:13:07 The California legislator will approve or deny the recommendations while also deciding how black residents will be repaid, according to the New York Times. Repaid. They're thinking about, well, there's a couple things, where they want to go. Two cases of Cherry Coke. A lot of times you find oneetime supply of water, no.
Starting point is 00:13:26 Oh! Dallas coming through with his Texas roots. Lifetime supply of Bubblicious. Purple. And you know what? Nike hoodies. Many of the... Patrice O'Neill had a great bit on it.
Starting point is 00:13:44 And he was no fucking moderate black dude, but he... You can't give us cash. We're going to run out. We're going to buy sneakers and rims. Many of the task force members recommend tuition in housing grants, but others requesting direct cash payments.
Starting point is 00:14:02 I bet they are. Give me the money, understand? Give me the fucking money, you hear me? You hear me? I said come here, bust they are. Give me the money, you understand? Give me the fucking money, you hear me? You hear me? I said come here, bust my body. Give me the fucking money. California's budget is predicted to operate, Nick, what the fuck, enough already.
Starting point is 00:14:16 Fucking 60 Minutes doesn't drill down like this. I'm on a storm. Hello, I'm Dan Rather. I'm a skeleton. Predict to operate a $25 billion deficit. Look at him. I've been reading it now. $25 billion after an expected tax revenue drop of $41 billion in fiscal year 21-22 through
Starting point is 00:14:38 fiscal year 23-24, whatever that means. The whole point is it's a stupid idea. It's ignorant. It's not going to happen. And if they actually attempt it, you're going to see you're going to see all of California move to Florida. Speaking of black people
Starting point is 00:14:54 and I'm not generalizing because I know plenty of fine, like I said, I moved here to Savannah. Never seen people get along better. I have black ladies calling me sugar at the register and one girl told me not to fucking color my hair anymore. I mean black ladies calling me sugar at the register. One girl told me not to fucking color my hair anymore. I mean, really, I've been seeing everybody.
Starting point is 00:15:09 Her name is Aisha. Black animal kills white guy. What kind of headline is that? This isn't the New York Times. An 83-year-old North Carolina Home Depot worker. I'll repeat, 83 worker. 83 still working at Home Depot. So, you repeat, 83 worker, 83 still working at Home
Starting point is 00:15:26 Depot, so you know he's a real asshole, huh? Has died weeks after he was tossed to the ground trying to stop, and this is in quotes, because the store gave this guy the name, Menace to Society Shoplifter, still on the loose. And this 83 old guy guy imagine dies of his injuries after he's thrown to the ground he's gone and we couldn't do nothing about it Gary a racer is seen on surveillance footage stepping up to confront a man naturally a brother leaving without paying oh I wonder why they follow them around stores so closely must be must be racism. Wheeling 3, Ryobi. Hey, Ryobi, that's my lawnmower.
Starting point is 00:16:11 Thief's got good taste, I gotta admit. Pressure cookers. Now, I wonder if he was making pulled pork or gonna blow up at a fucking bus station. Remember? Because that's what the... Pulled pork. I had that.
Starting point is 00:16:25 I had a great joke after the explosion. Remember there was an explosion in Times Square or whatever. There was a terrorist attack. And they said, you know, if you see something, say something. And I had a joke about me. I called 911. I said, I see three guys. They're Middle Eastern.
Starting point is 00:16:40 I know they're Middle Eastern. I go, because it's 11 degrees. They're wearing sandals. Easton, I know they're Middle East and I go because it's 11 degrees wearing sandals, they're taking a pressure cooker out of the back of a car and the lady on the phone said well, do you think they're terrorists? I said well, yeah, they're Muslims. I doubt they're making pulled pork in that. Terrific joke.
Starting point is 00:17:01 It would knock the shit out of one side of the room and then a Terrific joke. It would knock the shit out of one side of the room, and then a bunch of students from NYU at the comedy would start looking at me like I was the biggest racist, and I'd go like this, then I'd get hit with a hijab. This is a hijab, not a she-jab. Confront the man wheeling three Ryobi pressure cookers out of the Hillsborough store on October 18th,
Starting point is 00:17:24 only to be shoved to the ground by the big black crook who then casually strolls away. Let's take a look at the jerk-off. Probably playing for the goddamn Steelers tonight. Anyways. 83 years old. I know that looks innocent guys, but when you're 83,
Starting point is 00:17:44 trust me. I tripped on my own shoes. I wear these goddamn slip-on things. They get rubber soles, and when you leave them on a rug and they blend into the rug, like when you trip on them, they don't budge because there's a rubber. It's like tripping on a tree stump. I've done three somersaults in the last month of my husband. It's like tripping on a tree stump.
Starting point is 00:18:04 I've done three somersaults in the last month of my husband. Anyways, Reza was rushed to a nearby hospital where he celebrated his 83rd birthday and made hopeful plans to see his new grandchildren for the first time, his wife told WNCN. Real bad guy, huh? Anyways, he died Thursday due to complications from the injuries received. Hillsborough cops announced the next day. The North Carolina medical examiner has ruled the death now a homicide. Adding the hunt continues
Starting point is 00:18:33 for a suspect they previously branded a menace to society. Meaning he's fucking done, he's robbed the store many times, yet nobody steps up. The cops don't. You don't because you don't want to be called a racist and lose your job. Nor do you want them to remove their mask because they're doing the right thing. Yeah, there you go. It's just beyond our comprehension that someone would do this for a couple of power washes, Razor's son Jeff said. It's about right.
Starting point is 00:19:06 There's something wrong with the black man's mind! There's something wrong with his mind! That is just mind-boggling, his son said. Reyes' widow Yvonne told the outlet her husband initially remained upbeat in the hospital until he saw footage of the attack. He lost it. He just lost it, she recalled. I don't know what that means. Maybe you shouldn't have shown him.
Starting point is 00:19:29 Meanwhile, police continue this search for the six... Let me give you the description, and I'm going to make a statement here that you all know, but I'm just going to say it anyways. I don't want to hear anything more about dialogue about race in this country, or how it's racist. I don't want to hear any more of dialogue about race in this country or how it's racist. I don't
Starting point is 00:19:45 want to hear any more of that shit, equal justice, whatever, fucking equity, equality, social. I don't want to hear any of it anymore, okay? Six-foot suspect who wore a black mask. And again, you people who aren't watching the show aren't seeing the picture. So let's say you're home and you're in the kitchen. You can't see the TV. You hear a six foot tall suspect wore a black mask, black Calvin Klein hoodie, and fled in a white Hyundai Sonata with an obscure North Carolina
Starting point is 00:20:13 plate. You wouldn't know. You wouldn't know it's a black person. And now you can go, oh yeah, we do. No, you wouldn't. No, you wouldn't. That's irrefucking responsible. We're still at a point in this country that you can't describe this motherfucker. If he was white, you wouldn't. That's error fucking responsible. We're still at a point in this country that you can't describe this motherfucker. If he was white, you'd say white guy.
Starting point is 00:20:31 We know that because that's how they do it. Or Asian or Indian, whatever. What the fuck? What is that that you can't say six-foot black guy? What? What? Seriously. There's a mental illness, a blind spot in this country
Starting point is 00:20:47 with the media that I don't understand. I guarantee people have got hurt because of that, like in New York City where some guy robs somebody who's black and they don't say it. Two hours later, he robs somebody else because you don't know the description of the fucking guy.
Starting point is 00:21:03 Whatever. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to fucking hear about discussion about race anymore it's fucking insane so he had a temporary north carolina tag that's not fucking good either take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape. The end. I don't know, but I've been told. Hey, guys, you know this and I know this. Nausea sucks.
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Starting point is 00:22:17 want the band that actually works at relieving your nausea, check out ReliefBand. Right now, we've got an exclusive offer just for my listeners. If you go to ReliefBand. Right now, we've got an exclusive offer just for my listeners. If you go to ReliefBand.com, use promo code NickDip, you'll receive 20% off plus free shipping and a no-questions-asked 30-day money-back guarantee. Remember, it's better to have ReliefBand and not need it than to need it and not have it. So head to R-E-L-I-E-F-B-A-N-D.com. Use promo code NickDip for 20% off plus free shipping. It's a great product. We thank them for sponsoring the show today. Speak out of nauseous. Every time I hear this guy's name, I get a little tingle and I don't even live there. Justin Trudeau, gunning for you, Canadians. Canada's latest firearm ban.
Starting point is 00:23:07 This guy's a hardcore fucking, yeah. Canada's latest firearm ban, otherwise known as Bill C-21, is receiving pushback from some of Canada's biggest personalities, including active National Hockey League all-star and Montreal Canadiens goalie and future Hall of Famer, Carey Price. I thought he got traded. I guess he didn't.
Starting point is 00:23:36 The latest ban comes just a couple of months after a handgun ban. Oh, my God. Went into effect. Putting a bunch of moose and dare at ease. I guess he's got the moose vote wrapped up, Trudeau. Putting a stop to any handgun sales, I'll repeat that, any handgun sales, purchases, or transfers in Canada.
Starting point is 00:24:03 What happened to my beloved Canada? What happened to the neighbors to the north that gave us the fine game up? And answers that question. Price, who is widely considered to be one of the best goalies ever to play in the NHL, took to his Instagram account to voice his opinion on the matter. He says, I love my family, I love my country, and I care for my neighbor. I am not a criminal or a threat to society,
Starting point is 00:24:42 but I am a tremendous goalie. I'm in no danger. If somebody shoots at me, I will kick my left pad out and make a beautiful save. Or catch the bullet. What Justin Trudeau is trying to do is unjust. I support the CCFR
Starting point is 00:25:01 to keep my hunting tools. Thank you for listening to my opinion. And he's exactly goddamn right. He was the best guy around. He's still around. Relax. Price is joined in his rejection of this Marxist horseshit proposed of the proposed editions by fellow outspoken hockey player Theo Fleury.
Starting point is 00:25:25 He's been around for a while. As well as other personalities, such as celebrity chef Michael Hunter. How did he get in there? Oh, Mike Hunter, yeah. His poutine is some of the best in Canada. I don't even know who's who there. Wouldn't it be funny if that's the chef bleeding? I guess that is
Starting point is 00:25:46 Theo Fleury. Is that what he looks like? Yeah. Guy in the fucking... Watched another episode of You Know What Last Night, Yellowstone. Again, I'll say this again. I don't know how many zillion dollar production, great shows or movies you're
Starting point is 00:26:03 going to ruin because of feminism. Giving a speech every time the sprout opens your mouth um the rest of the show yeah it's sort of indigenous no pun intended it's a inherent to the script you got a white guy rich white guy kevin carson you got indians want their land back you know that that i can see whatever but feminist shit, there must be somebody on every Hollywood set from the Nau Organizers. I'm not fucking shitting you that says we have to have her say this, that, that. They got a hot chick who was
Starting point is 00:26:33 a stripper. She's Native American. Now she's hanging out like one of the boys, literally. There's a scene last night. I'm going off on a tangent. I give a fuck. It's my show. There's a scene last night. They're playing poker and some black cowboy, and I guess there were a lot of those more than we realized. He makes fun of the guys who play poker at the table. He says, you're a
Starting point is 00:26:52 bunch of pussies. We play real poker, which is where they go out in the middle of a ring where you ride horses or let bulls run free. You set up a table and you play poker, then you let a bull out. That's, I guess, what real cowboys do. Of course, the women, the Native American chick goes out there with them. You know, calling the guys pussies too. Guess who's the last one to fucking run from the table
Starting point is 00:27:17 when the bulls let loose? See what I'm saying? Even the most staunch feminist dyke would throw up blood watching that scene. Do you believe that, Dallas? I don't believe there's a woman that will be the last one there. And the guys that she's playing poke with are all ex-prisoners, cons and shit. They're tough guys and now they're cowboys, you know. But no, not her.
Starting point is 00:27:41 She didn't sprint. Everybody... Anyways, back to this. But no, not her. She didn't sprint. Everybody. Anyways, back to this. I'm just saying it's like watching, like I said before, Jurassic Park and having somebody eat a quarter pounder with cheese. A dinosaur is up. It's that fucking stupid. The legislation seeks to create a definition.
Starting point is 00:28:02 What was I been talking about? Oh, the gun ban in Canada. The legislation seeks to create a definition of a prohibited assault-style firearm. They're going to make up their own definition, for which no definition exists in Canada law. But when you're a dictator, totalitarian government, you can do whatever you want, despite the term being referred to many times in legislation already. At 309 pages, the proposed list would ban a large number of shotguns and rifles, including, but not limited to, what would be considered hunting rifles and shotguns, as well as those that would be used by military or police. They're trying to fucking dearm you.
Starting point is 00:28:47 This is fucking outrageous. Many popular Barrett, that's a brand, Sig Sauer, Ann Heckler? I didn't know that. And what is it, Coach? Firearms would
Starting point is 00:29:04 be added to Canada's already exhaustive weapons bans list, which often names very rare historical or collective firearms. Okay, whatever. Fucking wordy fuck. Some consecutive, oh my God, hold on. Fuck some consecutive. Oh my god. Hold on I'm telling you I want you to sit here for five minutes your eyes start watering everything's blurring in Anyways, some some consecutive
Starting point is 00:29:43 Some conservative politicians in the country have spoken out against the band saying stuff like I got to a tree gun You don't take them from me. I scored four or five goals, met a girl with two big tits. Against the ban, such as Conservative Member of Parliament, Glenn Motz. Have you had the Glenn Motz? Oh, my goodness. Who said he thought it was a deliberate attempt to mislead the Canadian public and mislead Parliament. Trudeau tweet. The legislation was first announced by Prime Minister Justin Trudeau in May 2022 on Twitter with a message decreeing one Canadian killed by gun violence is one too many. Did you just think of that phrase, genius? You go fuck yourself, convict! Put your black face back on and go suck a dick in your theater class.
Starting point is 00:30:26 What a piece of shit. That's why we've banned 1,500 types, this is him bragging, of military-style assault firearms, and that's why today we've introduced legislation to further strengthen gun control in Canada. It doesn't even sound, it sounds like you're piling on. You're not kidding anybody. You just said we got it under control. We have the most, but we're going to add this on
Starting point is 00:30:50 top of it. What are you, proud of yourself? As there has been no agreement under the law that defines the functionality nor any one type of firearms inherent dangers over another, Canadian legislation simply contains a list of banned firearms slash weapons that has continuously been added to since 1998. He's been banning guns, or Canada has been banning guns I should say since 1998 what's left? That's 24 years ago, what do you got left wrist rocket and What the fuck They hate him up there, too
Starting point is 00:31:40 At least the hockey players I hang out with do No no no no Jesus that scared me. Too much coffee. A young, this is our FLA segment tonight, folks. A young Florida deputy, this was, speaking of guns, this is just horrible. I don't know how shit like this happens, especially with people who are trained. A young Florida deputy was accidentally shot and killed by his roommate, also an officer. Do you fucking believe this shit? We'll just give you the, it's a local news story explaining what happened. Go ahead, chick. Brevard County Sheriff Wayne Ivey says Deputy Austin Walsh and
Starting point is 00:32:26 Deputy Andrew Lawson were roommates in Palm Bay. They were playing video games at home on Damascus Avenue early Saturday morning. The sheriff says during a break, Deputy Lawson was joking around with a handgun that he thought was unloaded. He pointed the gun at Deputy Walsh and pulled the trigger. That one shot killed him. It's unnecessary and totally avoidable incident. Jesus Christ. That makes you wonder, I know, you have to have a little, you know what I mean? There's that little part of you that everybody has to be going, was it really an accident or did he hate this guy? You know what I mean there's that little part of you that everybody has to be going did he was it really an accident or did he hate this guy you know I mean maybe he took the last sausage like last night I don't know um I'm just saying you have that has to enter your
Starting point is 00:33:15 mind a little bit right because that sounds way too stupid to do if especially if you're trained you would never point a gun at anybody. Law enforcement, military, whatever, it's basic rule number one. Never point at anything you don't intend to kill. That's right. That's why I'm saying my mind goes right to maybe he intended to kill. That's my next thought. I mean, yes, accidents do happen,
Starting point is 00:33:40 but that's a hard one to fucking... Now, let's give him the benefit of the doubt. His life's fucking ruined, I would think. But he does get his coat back. Nick, what the fuck kind of... What's the matter with you? What's the matter with you? I'm sorry, Jimmy.
Starting point is 00:33:54 It was my mother's name. Get it out of here! What a horrible... Even I, you know, that's the first thing, man. You don't even put your finger inside the... I know that. I still point it at the wife or giggle at her. Got a good sense of humor like that.
Starting point is 00:34:16 Can you imagine, like, the utter shock, though? And what do you... Like that. You think he slept since that happened? I mean, you have to... You know happened I mean you have to you know I mean even if it's an accident though yeah if it wasn't he slept like a baby but just a little side note here I go to this indoor range down here, not far from my house. And I had Googled it, and a couple years ago, not that long ago, I think I've mentioned this on the show before,
Starting point is 00:34:52 a guy goes in there with his kid, who's like 12 or 13, and gives him this real powerful shotgun or semi-automatic, I don't know what it was, but that's what it said in the article the kid shoots it goes back like this his father's behind him kills the old man by accident can you fucking imagine so I walked in there and I said let me retrust this I've read the article. I don't believe in it. Let me retrace this. And they said, get out of here. Fuck out of here. Anyways. I'm thinking about getting rid of my AR. You want it, Dallas?
Starting point is 00:35:34 Yeah. Huh? Yes. I know you do. You just might get it, son. Lawson told, I don't like guns. I like the fucking ones I can point to people at a red light. I can't get the rifle.
Starting point is 00:35:48 I can't get an AR up like that. Fucking. I keep hitting the barrel on the glass. Lawson told investigators that he jokingly. Why is that in quotes, by the way, in the article? Maybe they don't trust it. That's right. I mean, they're not only, they're saying he's full of shit.
Starting point is 00:36:11 You shouldn't put it in quotes. Pointed a gun at his best friend, pulled the trigger, thinking that he had unloaded the firearm. It's my brother congratulating some fucking guy that won the pool not named me fuck i'm 24th out of like 200 out of 100 and something people i've been there for about a month it's actually been pretty consistent anyways i know you guys are losing sleep over that walsh was struck once and died at the scene. Cops said, God damn it. Lawson was taken into custody on a no bond warrant by agents from the Florida Department of Law Enforcement on a manslaughter rap.
Starting point is 00:36:55 Ivy said in a Facebook post, he turned himself in on Sunday. Official said, Austin and Andrew were the best of friends and Andrew was completely devastated over what had happened. Wink, wink. Ivy said, no. Ivy said in a Facebook post, even with that, there was no excuse for this tragic and totally avoidable death. Exactly right. So this guy's got to go to jail, right? You've got to do some time, don't you?
Starting point is 00:37:16 You've got to do something. How about cutting my lawn? Ivy said Walsh had fulfilled a lifelong dream of being a police officer and started with a brevet agency at uh age 18 after enrolling in a cadet program man austin was such a great kid ivy said this is like the sheriff our hearts are broken at his loss he will be deeply missed by our agency our community and our prayers with his family ivy said lawson was deeply distraught at the scene of the incident and cooperated what's he gonna do give the finger and run uh with responding officers but you don't point a fucking god damn it you gotta grow up
Starting point is 00:37:56 you're playing video games that doesn't helputs you in the mood. Andrew, he's a great kid, Ivy said, who sadly made a horrible and irresponsible decision that has forever impacted the lives of so many, which is so true. Get some help, kid. That's all I can say. You know, shrink or whatever the fuck. And legal. Oh, God. That's all I can say. You know, shrink or whatever the fuck. And legal. Oh, God. I think I hear Trudeau going, see? See what I told you?
Starting point is 00:38:34 Hey? Why did I do a Spanish accent there? I have no fucking idea. Castro. Yes. That's right. He's Castro's son. You're right. Ah, I got umber.
Starting point is 00:38:48 Hey guys, make plans to come and see me on the road starting next month. Here's where I'll be and when. January 13th, 14th, Comedy Off-Broadway, Lexington, Kentucky. March 11th and 12th, The Comedy Club of Kansas City, Kansas City, Missouri. April 21st and 22nd, The Funny Bone, St. Louis, and then St. Charles, Missouri. Get tickets at all these shows at nickdip.com and click on the tour button
Starting point is 00:39:09 Alright? Headline Goo Goblin Goblin Mode refers to a type of behavior I thought it was something totally different which is unapologetically
Starting point is 00:39:22 self-indulgent lazy slovenly, or greedy. Are they going to mention my name in this fucking thing? Typically in a way that rejects social norms or expectations. In other words, Gen Z. Yeah. According to the Oxford Dictionary. Y'all fat fuck, look at you.
Starting point is 00:39:43 What? Oh. I thought that was a dictionary. Y'all fat fuck, look at you. What? Oh. I thought that was a finger. In Dallas, that's a tooth. Looks like a, it looks like a Jew accountant with seasickness.
Starting point is 00:39:55 Nick, what? That's anti-Semitic. No, it ain't. I hate Kanye West. Now, the esteemed Tome has declared its official word, that Tome is booked, folks. Of 2022 is goblin mode.
Starting point is 00:40:11 I thought that was totally like my wife wants to blow me once a year. So this is the official word. First of all, it's two words, you assholes. How can it be the word of 2022? What the fuck is going on? The group announced Monday. The phrase won an online vote. People living life at a breakneck pace, huh? The first in the publication's history to win the title for 2022.
Starting point is 00:40:37 Given the year we've just experienced, goblin mode resonates with all of us who are feeling a little overwhelmed at this point. Oxford language president Casper Grathwald told Report, what does that mean, the year we just experienced? COVID ended a while ago. What are you fucking talking about? While Oxford typically selects the word of the year internally, the organization opened the choice up to an internet vote.
Starting point is 00:41:02 I see. It was picked from the outside in That changes everything to this story Vote for the first time this year historically fraught decision Oxford instructed voters to choose a word that sums up the ethos the mood or the preoccupations of the past 12 months or the preoccupations of the past 12 months. What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:41:27 You can act like a man. What's the matter with you? There he is. That looks like an Italian girl he dated in high school. The competition ultimately came down to three choices, goblin mode, metaverse, and the hashtag... I stand with so it is Gen Z horseshit Goblin Mode one with a 93% I've never heard of the phrase
Starting point is 00:41:55 that's because you're Gen fucking you're Gen before Christ 93% of more than 340,000 votes cast, according to the AP. Goblin mode primarily sees use online, especially in the fag chat rooms. Why do you say shit like that? Because it's fun. Oxford's word of the year in 2021 was Velvitas dripping speed bag. That's for vagina.
Starting point is 00:42:25 Kenny Rogerson came up with it. Oxford word of the year in 2021 was vex. And it chose to skip selecting a word in 2020. Oh, God. I agree there was no single word that could do it justice. How about Fauci? Stink weed. Meanwhile, Merriam-Webster's dictionary selected gaslighting as the official word of 2022
Starting point is 00:42:50 and said it should be branded on Biden's forehead. And it had selected vaccine in 2021. And Nick, I'll ask you this question. Who gives a fuck what you think? I agree. Apparently he's getting late, but I chose that one. Oh, my God. It's almost over.
Starting point is 00:43:11 Finally, tonight. This really separates men and women. This proves there's only two fucking genders. This footage. Bitches get stitches. A wild fight on the court. footage. Bitches get stitches. A wild fight on the court. Saw
Starting point is 00:43:25 eight players ejected Monday during a women's basketball game between TCU and George Washington University. I had TCU plus 14 and I lost a grand. So a couple of these college girls? Yes.
Starting point is 00:43:42 Aren't they? Terrific gals. You know. My vagina's angry. Terrific gals. You know. My vagina's angry. Oh, it was. It is. It's pissed off. Tensions began to boil over in the second quarter when George Washington's Essence Brown.
Starting point is 00:43:58 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Essence Brown. When I think of essence, I think of smell. I think of brown. I think of shit. That's not a good name. Right? Essence Brown. How about, how about Odory P? Yellow. I fucked that joke up. What am I, a fucking open mic? How's my tooth look? Washington Essence Brown appeared to get tangled up in the pubic hair of TCU's Bella Cravens.
Starting point is 00:44:31 They both have giant muffs the size of catches, man. God damn it, you were right. And the latter got a rebound. Things continued to escalate when Dennis Rodman ran on a pair of pumps, kicked them both in the balls. All hell broke loose. Continued to escalate when the two had a heated exchange on the court and then began throwing hands in one another's faces. Players from both TCU and George Washington then attempted to separate Brown and Cravens,
Starting point is 00:44:54 who appeared to be held back by one of Brown's teammates. Watch how these girls throw punches, and it's why men still run the planet. I hate to say it, but check this out. What the hell is that about? Why you. What's the idea? Get up there.
Starting point is 00:45:17 Sit down. Yeah, go ahead. Here's the other angle. Go ahead. Bill's actually killed. What do you grabbing? Not tits. Boy, I had a roll in the hay with the captain of the girls' basketball team up at UMaine. Dude, about 6'1 she's dirty blonde
Starting point is 00:46:06 she was like Swedish and something else with a big gap in her teeth but just beautiful even with a it almost gave her character and she had a great like a guy's of course she had like a personality
Starting point is 00:46:20 she loved dirty jokes but she was feminine as hell. You know what I mean? It wasn't one of these monsters. Luckily, it was Division 19. No. Anyways, a lot of fun. I hurt my back.
Starting point is 00:46:33 And I was in great shape then. Anyways, the Horned Frogs later pulled away. Thank God they told me this part. With a 75th day victory over George Washington, proven in a 4-4. TCU's head coach, Reagan, perebly addressed the incident following the game.
Starting point is 00:46:46 A bunch of dirty thugs punching each other. I don't like it. I'll lick them all later. That's all she said. That's the show, folks. I'm not going to read all that bullshit. Fuck them.
Starting point is 00:46:56 I said this to her, though. I don't shut up! And then she said, Your mom goes to college. That is it. Again, thank you guys so much. Don't forget Cameo.com. If you want me to roast a friend or relative, go to Cameo.com.
Starting point is 00:47:11 You guys think it, I'll say it. You're very welcome. See you back here tomorrow for the third day of the week. Have a nice day, everybody. Hi. Good night, everybody. I'm out. guitar solo Thanks for watching!

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