The Nick DiPaolo Show - Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen EP 11 | Nick Di Paolo Show #1582

Episode Date: June 6, 2024

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo cooks stuffed peppers in Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen Ep 11! Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com

🎵 You're being very negative, Mr. DiPaolo. Yeah. And your point? Folks, welcome to the show on a Thursday. Today's episode is a whole episode, another episode of Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen. Today, stuffed bell peppers. Very easy.

I think this is a good one, like I said, for single guys or whatever. It's quick. It's basically a bell pepper. Cut the lid off it. Leave it for a lid. You can use ground beef. I like to use a little sausage,

a little ground beef, but I'll be using ground beef today. Yeah, we made it a couple weeks ago and used ground bison. Dallas used bison because he's one of those uppity cooks. He's like... Look, I'm going to have to top him. Today we're using squirrel and skunk balls. Yeah.

So yeah, you can put anything in there. That's the beauty of it. But it's a kind of a man's thing, you know, ground beef or ground bison or whatever, mixed with a little rice and tomato sauce. That's how I do it.

But again, you can maybe put barbecue sauce. I don't know. And you, and you, wild rice is actually really good. Yeah. Tons of flavor in it. Yeah, I know, but I'm not going to take the time to do that. I don't know. Wild rice is actually really good. It's got tons of flavor in it.

Yeah, I know, but I'm not going to take the time to do that. I'm a fucking... Plus, I like the picture of Uncle Ben. I can make fun of that fucker. So yeah, that's it. I mean, again, you can put whatever. Put candy in it if you want. But I use... The old-fashioned thing is rice, meat, and some type of sauce.

And it's fucking great. Because the bell pepper gets all caramelized and shit. Anyways, that's what we're doing on the show. Anyways, I hope that made your eyes water. So without further ado, Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen. Welcome to another edition of Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen. Welcome to another edition of Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen. This is from my boy in Royalsford, Pennsylvania. Don Gilroy sent me this. As you can see, it says, I know a lush when I see one.

That's Frank Rizzo. He was a cop in Philly, then became mayor from 1972 to 1980. Was known to be a tad racist, or what we call today just honest. Even black people respected him. I mean, a lot of them hated him, but respected this guy because the crime was so bad and he was cleaning up the streets. So, whatever. Probably.

Anyways, that was one of his. I know a lush one. He said that to somebody. You can find that on the internet. But thank you, Don Gilroy. This guy was a Democrat until 1986, which has surprised me. But let me put this over there. All right.

Dale, let's get a shot of this. This is for you. This is Dale. Just pretend it's a micro-bro thing. Just don't tell me what it is and we'll be fine. bro thing yeah exactly let's get a look at what we need here this is stuff well pep you probably made them guys this is this is I'm not doing new bow breaking any new ground here it's just a great meal if you're in a hurry like I said you're a single guy 30 who are family

on a budget what you need depending on how many people I'd say one peppers a serving right so I get four here probably need a pound and a half I would say of ground beef or this is human brains we use it this is human brains get a pound pound and a half of hopefully Republican brains. Tomato sauce. I'm not going to use all that, obviously. Onion. I'll make garlic bread to throw on the side. But this is tit, as they say.

And let me tell you something. Anytime you're handling raw brains, I learned this from going on a killing spree in high school. Good to take the wetting off when you're handling raw beef or you're handling somebody you met at the bar. What? Oh, you heard me. Should we get started? Yes, good.

Let's fucking do it. Is this mine? Good, that's off. Here we go. Either one yellow onion or half. I'll tell you once I start chopping. I could have chopped this ahead of time, but then the show will be 11 minutes long. Unless we get a chopping commentary.

Yes, chopping commentary. Right now, Hunt is being grilled, apparently. Delicious. The old trick. Let him and used to do. When he had a cooking segment. Yeah, baby. Yeah, baby. Where did that go?

I didn't see nothing. You sound like Frank Rizzo. Yeah. I didn't see nothing here. I'm going with a whole onion. Fuck it. Why not? Anything that starts with an onion is good in my opinion. I'm going with a whole onion. Fuck it. Why not?

Anything that starts with an onion is good, in my opinion. Usually. Unless you're at Arby's. I don't think so. It's too exotic. We have the meat. Yeah, what kind of meat? Fucking raccoon legs.

Alright, I'm using... This has become my new favorite skillet. It's a wok, but look at the surface area. You know what I'm saying? Hey, it went on in the first... First go. Yeah. So, uh... Get that hot. That's like way too much every time I make this I always have like not filling for a month and there's only four pepper and I'm using I take pride in my spatial skills

I can use the eye shit perfectly Oliver oh probably more than I need because there's gonna be a lot of grease in the beef. Dallas, I'll tell you, he cooks. Dallas made a pozole, he said, like they have a domino. Pazole. Pazole. Is that Spanish? It is South American, yes. South American.

I'm sure it'll be the fucking dish of this country. Thanks to Biden. Yeah, exactly. It might save your life someday. Somebody's holding your hostage, you and your wife. Thank you, Pazole. Yeah, okay. We'll cut him slack.

Just take his left hand. It's my instruments of war. Oh, she... This better be clean. Somebody better run this thing. Of course not. I washed my hands before we started folks, take my word for it. I'm like Hawkeye Pierce with his shit. What's that? Yeah. my uh my go-to all-purpose got oregano onion salt garlic salt it's all right in here

i'm gonna cook this down for like four or five minutes and i'm gonna throw the beef right in here break it up you know again this is like a hamburger inside a pepper hi welcome back to well actually we didn't leave hold on oh pubic hair no i'm just kidding we don't have those anymore not since not since the chemo okay We don't have those anymore. Not since the chemo. Brains.

Again, I only have four peppers. I'd say half of this. This is like two and a half pounds. I don't know if I'm going to need that much. Hands are impeccably clean, folks. Trust me. I suppose you should do it in batches, but who's got the time? All right. I put, I don't know, I would say that's a pound, maybe a little over,

which is more than enough for four peppers. Again, don't forget the seasoned chip. There's more than enough for four peppers. Don't forget the seasoned chip. They say that's the biggest mistake rookie cooks make on the season. In the second half of the show, I'll be talking about stuffed bell peppers and how I burned them.

Also, get full episodes of The Nick DiPaolo Show and Lotto of the Crowd of four days a week. Brian Callen and Mr. Guns and Gear weekly and exclusive live streams with Alex Jones for $9 monthly or $89 annually. You get all that for $9 or $89 annually. That's exclusively on Mug Club, so sign up now at nickdip.com. And for you listeners out there, we are now uploading the complete audio version of the show in addition to video. Watchers can still access the video version as normal. So without further ado, back to more of Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen. Hey, boys and girls, head over to nickdip.com to get exclusive hats,

t-shirts, hoodies, and more. It's yet another way for you to support the show and look sexy at the same time. You can also get signed copies

of my previous specials and all of the Nick-a-shirts. Just go to nickdip.com and click on store. Again, that's nickdip.com. Click on store. Thank you guys so much. See you soon. Who told me that top world chef works at a place called Applebee's? Yeah. There you go. Fucking Ben Franks, Brent Franklin's? What is it? Golden Corral. All the hot spots he hit.

So you got to brown this. I don't know how long it takes. Just make sure it's not pink. Different role for sex. Listen. What? Oh, shut it. Hey, well, that's well, that's cooking. I'm using minute rice because I'm pretending I'm a bachelor and I'm going to hurry. Minute rice, which is so good.

But Dallas is right. If you get wild rice or any of that shit, it's really, really good. That's kind of a nice and really really good it does it has a nutty of you know it's nutty baby it's Paul Paul used to say in the letterman Oh Dave it's nutty nutty kind of time minute rice time for I thought I had the box in there I was going to do the thing they did on the Sopranos Tony Soprano meets Meadows' boyfriend And he's black and Jewish

Double whammy Yeah Perfect for this show Double whammy The kid from Alabama Texas Yeah And Tony sort of, the kid from Alabama, Texas. Yeah, and Tony sort of tells the kid off.

He's going, listen, she didn't do you any favors by bringing you in here. Now, I got a lot of guys I work with that are black that wouldn't want my son dating their daughter. So I think I get my point. The kid's like, fuck you. And he goes, that's what I'm talking about. Now, when she comes downstairs, you're going to say How nice it was to meet me And then you're going to leave It's so fucking

And then he leaves And then Tony Goes into the kitchen And He's fuming about the black boyfriend He opens, I don't know if it was the next morning Or that same day, he opens it and there's a thing Uncle Ben's rice with a black guy on it And he has fuming about the black boyfriend. He opens, I don't know if it was the next morning or that same day. He opens it and there's a thing of Uncle Ben's rice with a black guy on it. And he has one of his seizures.

He falls down and breaks it. And they shot it out of sequence. So at the beginning of the show, they show him on the floor with blood. You don't know what happened. And then they reverse it. And he gets up and fucking rightin' right up your alley, Dallas. I'm telling you. Okay, right

now this looks like your grandmother's... Box. Yeah, thank you. The cameraman's doing the dirty shit today. Yeah, kind of a gray. Picture your grandmother at the gynecologist. Nick, why are you ruining the meal i don't know it's that gray unhealthy look when you pick up a hooker in medford mass what you heard me

see that doesn't look like a lot of meat but when i throw rice in there that's the filling meat rice and a little bit of tomato sauce. Oh that's what I'm...fucking memory. That's why I took this out. Cup of water. This shit was made for people on the go. Get out of the way. Not this one. Not that one No No, real rice is Pain in the ass actually Cup of Cup of water In case you guys don't know how to do minute rice

If that's the case Loosen the strap on your helmet And uh God, that smells Fucking good Yeah, get a God, that smells fucking good. Yeah, you boil a cup of water, and you put the same amount of rice in a cup of rice, minute rice. Bring it to a boil, shut the heat off, put the lid on it, let it sit for, they say five minutes, I give it ten. And there's your rice.

This is so tit. Sal, should I leave the fat in there? Yes. Later. I'm with you. This is the lid to my thing here. Yeah. What does it need, Nick? Ghost in the Darkness. It's like a movie. Yes this is a ghost pepper hot sauce just to, on the white side, just to, you know. I'm starting to put this shit on my ice cream and I'm addicted to this stuff.

My old man was like that with hot peppers. Like, how can you eat that shit? Burns your stomach up. Now I'm just the same way. Look, it wakes up your tongue and your... Water's boiling. Salt. wakes up your tongue and your... water's boiling. Salt, cup of water boiling, cup of minute rice. Is this a real show? Alice catch! Bring this to a burl shut this up I guess I could put the sauce in now doesn't matter right oh wait yeah I'm leaving that grease in there it was That's how flavor is. It's like that old way to drain it. But since my cholesterol is down... You could spoil your shell. Why not ruin a perfectly good heart? All right.

I like the serrated knife when I'm cutting stuff like this it's the only sharpener in the house actually ask my wife watch what I'm going to do here I'm making lids so that's going to go right back on there when you're cooking them and I go I guarantee most of you guys know this recipe

maybe not, I don't know. Maybe there's a young retarded girl in her teens watching this show. Who loves the show. Who loves the show. Loves politics, you know. They like that long-winded shit. Those kids on the internet, you know. Get out of there. I'll pick that up later.

Look, man. there's your lid. Listen! Do you have a house phone? Had to point that out, didn't you? Yeah, I don't know why. Ask Andy. No, there's a reason. I forget why.

It was something like that. It was. It was called the Jew. Folks, you know I'm pro. You know I'm pro-Jew. If you listen to the show, you know I'm pro-Israel-israel yeah everything's very good Dallas gets it some people don't

look at that come on of course Andy buys four different colors mine would have been all brown gray got cheap. They smell a little funny. Taste it. Well, at least you can say that they're delicious. Please don't use that word on this show. I'm so...

I have proof I was ahead of the curve by about 20 years my first album Born This Way that I did in La Jolla on there I start screaming diversity is a big diversity is our strength is a big lie it was 1992 93 okay I'm glad people are catching up finally how could you say that does it look like it's working? Is this country working? Huh? No.

One thing the founding fathers, they were geniuses, no doubt about it. They couldn't predict what assholes people would turn into. They came up with a system where people had honor and respect to each other.

Let me ask you a question. Were they, were the founding fathers, were they in on inviting people from all over the world? Not necessarily. Not really, right? That was well put. Not necessarily.

Guys had powdered wigs on and knickers, and they drank a lot. I don't think big fans of the Guatemalans. Come on, Minute Rice. You'll kill it. Be right back. This seems like a minor detail if you're gonna make this mail and you're shopping for bell peppers make sure you get like the squarest ones that sit like that you know i mean not the tall ones that tip over done that many times and uh end up almost getting divorced because of it. Really ugly fight over a pepper that had leprosy.

They were tarted pepper. It was physically challenged as far as peppers go. For those of you on Mug Club, stick around for the second half of the show. Everyone else go to NickDip.com and join to get my full show, the great Steven Crowder's full show, and a whole lot more. And now back to the conclusion of Nick's Bitchin' Kitchen.