The Nick DiPaolo Show - Shoplifting Legal for Minorites | Nick Di Paolo Show #660

Episode Date: February 10, 2022

Democrats reverse course ahead of midterms. Black Bush bashes Biden. Chappelle says NO. Students sue Loudoun Co School board. NYC thieves.

I am so sick and tired of the liberal agenda that is destroying our country from our schools to our workplaces to our media. It's literally everywhere. Well, everywhere maybe, but not this show. Never. Here you get the truth, unfiltered and unapologetic. I don't care if I hurt feelings or if I take a position that isn't agreeable or if I step on somebody's toes, I call them the way I see them and I put it out there for free. To keep this show free, I need your help. Please go to nickdip.com and make a contribution or even better, subscribe at thecomicsgym.com or on Patreon today and get an extra encore show each day. Discounts on merchandise and a whole lot more. Thank you guys so much for watching, sharing, and contributing

to the best show, in my opinion, on the internet and the most honest. You guys make it happen. guitar solo Oh yeah. Welcome to the big show, folks. How are you? It's Thursday, final day of the week. That's right, four-day work week here, like Europe. No four-hour naps, though, in the afternoon. Have you tried to get lunch in Italy? Or any of those countries? Jesus Christ. They're open from like fucking 12 noon to 12.08, then they close till 6. The fuck, speed eaters.

Anyhow, what else? I'm still sweating through my sheets and I don't know. I don't have a temperature and I don't know what to tell you. Maybe my wife's trying to kill me. She's putting some type of fucking antifreeze in my fucking eggs. And again, I make my own eggs. Let's rule that one out.

I get all paranoid. I watch these ID network shows. It's fucking clever. Clever shit going on. Very hard, though, to get rid of your wife or your husband. You can't with the technology. It's fucking ridiculous. But you can steal steaks at fucking noontime out of Trader Joe's. I'm talking like I got a fever.

Out of my fucking mind. Anyhow, blah, blah, blah, Olympics, Russian chick, cheating, if anybody gives a fuck. Let me tell you about the Japanese. First of all, we're embarrassing ourselves over there. We have two gold medals. We're like eighth, perfect for a Biden-led country. China's probably laughing their balls off in Russia. Let me tell you about those Japanese kids. You know that half-pipe fucking... They're making everybody look sick.

You'd think kids from Norway and fucking Denmark and Colorado would dominate this shit. Japanese known for that? They're aerodynamic. They're so small. Well, that's actually a legitimate point. Kids weigh about 11 grams soaking wet. No fear whatsoever. You know, their great-grandparents

are kamikaze pilots. But they are fucking unbelievable. And then there's an Asian kid figure skating. By the way, I like watching figure skating. Still say it would be better if the girls didn't have any panties. Who's with me? No? All right. It's filthy.

But how about the fucking, what's his name, Ware? You know, I'm talking about the gold, what's his first name? Let's just call him Jizz Ware. He's got a lady's hairdo. He's fucking sparkly. Laying it on. Nobody's that gay, okay? I don't have a problem with gay people,

but nobody's that fucking gay. Gay people watch him, and they're embarrassed. Fucking laying it on. Nobody talks like that. Jesus Christ. He slipped in the shorts. Fucking do like a fifth grade school teacher. You fucking just grow a twat and get it over with you.

Anyways. Yeah, there's a kid that goes to Yale, Asia. It's all fucked up. Everybody that's winning medals for America, they're Asian. There's an American girl representing China. Whatever the fuck. I'm sure the globalists love it. Look, it's all one world.

And eventually, you know, eventually they won't be able to say what countries they're from. It's just humans. You know what I mean? It'll be a human company. Seriously, that's their end fucking goal. It just happens to involve creating a germ that wipes out half the population. Anyhow, but those five,

that half pipe and those skiers and shit, it just blows my mind what they do. They are fearless. The fucking wall's 22 feet, and then they go another 20, some of them. So that's a three-story building, and they said that ice is as hard as concrete.

So I watch it the same reason the rest of the world watches. I want to see somebody get paralyzed. Yeah, you do. You know, it's almost boring when they nailed their routine perfectly. Anyways, enough of that shit. Let's get on with the show so I can go home and, I sweat through the couch. In the N-word segment tonight, real quick, I'm not the type that likes to say I told you so, but this is an I told you so. Just a few things about people who get vaccinated who told me I should get vaccinated. Richard Hirschman, an

embalmer for over 20 years, started noticing very odd blood clots that he's never seen before. January 20, January last month of this year, 65% of his cases exhibited these clots. Pre-pandemic, up 65%. Two high school basketball players last night, one in Texas and one outside of Chicago, dropped dead after the game or during the game. We don't know that that's COVID-related or vaccine-related, but when they don't mention it, I tend to think it is. And finally, and I mentioned this earlier this week, insurance actuary from a big insurance company called One America saying he's, his name's Davidson, he's seen the highest death rates in people 18 to 64. The CDC says 900, there's been 942,431 excessive deaths, up 40% since pre-pandemic. Not all related to the event, but you do the timelines kind of odd. And one, to give you an idea how high that is,

40% pre-pandemic. If a one in 200 year catastrophe happened, it would only cause a 10% rise. So there you go. So sleep tight. Enjoy your iron lung in five years. I'm fine. And will continue to be so,

except for a little bloating from salsa last night. All right. All right. Let's get on. Let's go on the goddamn show. Well, we're waiting. It's coming. Ah, dimwit Democrats.

Boy, they're making assholes of themselves. They are the dumbest. Let me tell you, people, Democrats, can I just say, you suck at everything you do. Politics was the last thing you guys should do. You're fucking horrible at it. Democrats across the country are scrambling to reverse course on COVID-19 restrictions as this year's midterm elections loom, which is anything, it's all political. It's their religion. They don't give two fucks about you. It's about grabbing power through their politic. It always has been. They want half this country to subsist at poverty level

so they have a reason to exist. It's always been that way. It'll never change. Now you see all these cities, these liberal city-run cities, they're doing what the fucking, they're doing what the mayors they were mocking were doing in red states and governors. DeSantis was about a year ahead of you. So is Youngkin in Virginia. So now a year ahead of you. So is Youngkin in Virginia. So now even Governor Murphy of New Jersey blew them my balls. He's ready to end all that. You guys are so transparent. You stink. With the notable exception of the White House, Democrats at every level are signaling their support for returning to normal. As polls show, Americans are wary of coronavirus restrictions, which Republican states have largely done away with a long time ago.

So who's the fucking idiots? Have you guys been right about anything in the last five years? Whether it was fucking Russian collusion, Kavanaugh, fucking COVID. Have you been right about anything? Leaving fucking Afghanistan, going after Trump's family. What the fuck have you... And I'm forgetting some big ones in there.

It's because I'm 60 and I'll be dead soon. Thank Christ. According to a recent poll by Monmouth University, 70% of Americans say it's time. Really? It's not 100? You 30% go to China, suck a dick and die. I'm very tired of you people. 70% say it's time. Really? It's not 100? You 30% go to China, suck a dick and die. I'm very tired of you people. 70% say it's time for the country to move on from the pandemic and a

decreasing number of Americans support COVID related say, let's move on. And it's like female governors going, I don't know. I think the kid should, that doesn't come from a guy. I'm sorry. Unless you're Bill de Blasio. President Biden's approval ratings on handling COVID, once a strength, when was that? I guess I fucking missed that meeting, are also now underwater with his dentures in a cup next to his bed, with 43% approving and 53% disapproving. Again, 43% approving,

you fucking people. You won't admit you're wrong about anything. Biden has chosen to follow the lead of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, which still recommends universal masking indoors and in schools. And isn't it led by that Lady Walensky, whatever her fucking name is? Just a soccer mom mentality. You got to be extra careful. God, we didn't even deserve to have Trump as president. He was so good. But with the midterms ahead, many Democrats who once led the way in issuing lockdowns because they love that type of power, they issued lockdowns and mandates. They were all for that because of the pandemic, are easing restrictions in their states.

In defiance of the administration numerous blue state governors this week have announced that they are rolling back coronavirus restrictions including new york rhode island new jersey connecticut delaware and massachusetts and prominent congressional democrats have also signaled their support for returning to fucking normal but do you think that would be enough, right? No, no, no, no. We've got to still keep some of the kids. It's, and this is after knowing, you know

who's a fucking devil? That Randy Weingarten, the head of the fucking broad, who looks like a man, again, like most broads and who heads up the school unions. She still wants the kids mad. Even after doctors, psychologists, everybody could agree,

it's like the worst thing you could do to kids. And this fucking whore is so power hungry, she's literally for like abusing kids. Physically. Anyways, sleep tight, Randy. Oh, and our libs eating lip segment tonight. Boy, they are eating you.

We could do 20 of these a day right now because there's infighting and it's a beautiful, it's a circle that they're just blasting each other. Black Bush bashes Biden. What kind of writing is that? That's some filthy shit. I'm talking about Cori Bush, the most racist piece. Makes fucking Joy Reid look like fucking Marie Osmond. President Joe Biden's vow to put the first black woman on the Supreme Court, because that's really important, not whether they can do the job, but continue to backfire this week when Rep Cori Bush, hateful black bitch who can't stand white people, accused him. Listen to this.

She's accusing Biden of pitting black women against each other. It's the Supreme Court. It's not a pit bull fight in your cousin's yard, you fuck. That's a great line. Put that on the previews. Fucking. Do you know how much you have to hate, seriously, hate white people or white men? Biden is guaranteeing a black female on the Supreme Court, even if she's not qualified. This bitch, that's not enough for her because now he's pitting black women against each other. You're damned if you do. You're damned if you fucking don't.

I love it. He deserves to be attacked by his own people. She's fucking hateful. There's some really, I swear to God, the most racist people in this country right now, black women her age. During an interview with Punchbowl News, Is that a real organization? Fuck. In an interview with Who Spiked the Punch, Bush was asked if the Congressional Black Caucus had come to an agreement on who the president

should pick while Judge J. Michelle Childs has been a floated favorite. There she is looking bored with the job already. Must be nice, huh? Bush said that she would not comment on any particular person. Why not? You fat, nasty black bitch. I'm not going to go after any particular person. I don't know her. I don't know her background. Try looking it up, you lazy fuck.

Well, I don't know her background well enough to be able to say so, she told Punchbowl News. While Bush did not like that Biden's pick would pit black women against each other, she acknowledged that the pick was necessary. You couldn't be more wrong about everything in your fucking life. It's necessary, though she listed some important qualifications. Getting a black woman in the seat is necessary. Just fucking brainwashed. But we want to make sure that it's a black woman who's strong on criminal justice reform. You know, letting more black thugs out on the street. They're not doing it fast enough right now. We need more Kim Foxes in the world. You know, the type Soros loves.

Has that type of history. Strong on worker protection. She's a fucking Marxist. Workers unite. White people die. Why don't you just call it that? I don't have a name, she said. I want the person who has those qualifications to rise to the top.

Ugh, I fucking... She's a malignant cunt. That's right, Polly. The president's file to nominate the first black woman to the Supreme Court has not exactly gone over well with Americans, including Democrats. In fact, the recent ABC News Ipsos poll showed that more than three-quarters of Americans, 76% for Mr. Biden, want the president to consider all possible nominees.

That's so un-American. Justice Stephen Breyer, while only 23% want him to honor his pledge of nominating the first black woman to the court. Is it because we're black? Yeah, it's the only reason. Can you fucking imagine not even considering the credentials? It's so unfair. There's probably a black woman out there who has all the credentials, but she's not connected in some way.

You know what I mean? Doesn't have any DC. How cynical can you get as a politician? You know what we'll do? We'll put a black chick on the Supreme Court. That'll wrap up the black vote for another four years. They fall for this shit every year, you know what we'll do? We'll put a black chick on the Supreme Court. That'll wrap up the black vote for another four years. They fall for this shit every year, you know. Black people, that's what they're doing to you, the white jerk-offs.

And there's a lot of black people in that poll that think it should be done by merit, too, I'm guessing. I would think. Biden's just like, ah, any black chick. Diana Ross is still alive. Let's fucking throw her up there. It's the only reference I could come up with. How about Rihanna? Is that her name?

Yeah, how about Rihanna? She seems sharp. How about fucking Beyonce? If it doesn't fucking matter. How about my maid at my house? What? Oh, I spit when I said that racist joke. How about my maid at my house? What? Ooh, I spit when I said that racist joke. I look a little heavy.

I ate about seven bags of corn chips at midnight with salsa. After having a, what the fuck did we have last night? I can't even fucking remember. I made some killer eggplant parm. Anyways, let's move on with this before I shit my pants. What do we got here? Oh, some more black people. Dave Chappelle, who I fucking love, by the way.

I know it's Sharpie. Remember when he was just a kid, sat down at the comedy cellar table? And he was. He was like fucking 19. And we were like, oh, this kid's a killer. Now, this surprised me, this story. I put for a headline, Chappelle racist, question mark. He lives, by the way, like outside of Cleveland on a huge farm. I like Chappelle.

He was a skinny, if you guys noticed, he was always a skinny runt. Also, the last few years, he started to bulk up, and I love that he still smokes. An Ohio village shot down a residential development plan that included affordable housing, which means, you know, bringing in the skankola to ruin your neighborhood. After Dave Chappelle and other residents rallied against the proposal during a

Monday night public hearing, a report said. Doesn't sound like the behavior of Chappelle. He's always for the downtrodden, but I love it. Now that he's got a few bucks, he's like, don't fucking ruin my neighborhood. Take that shit elsewhere. And you know what? It's a very American date. Don't be ashamed. The comedian also

threatened to yank his own business ventures, a restaurant, and a comedy club from the village of Yellow Springs if they approved the housing plan, the Dayton Daily News reported. That's Chappelle's house. It's kind of modest for a billionaire.

No. I'm saying... Can you imagine if that was it? He's a cool cat, man. He's got about a thousand... He's got about 10,000 acres, too, out there. What's with the... Geraldo Rivera lives in Cleveland.

I don't know what the draw to Ohio is, period. Unless you're going to OSU, I don't either. Actually, but my brother loves it. He lives at a golf course at Nicholas Bilton. It's like anywhere else. It's beautiful parts, but Geraldo Rivera, I don't understand.

He's a New Yorker. I don't know if his wife is from Cleveland. Remember he picked up and moved to Calabasas. He's another guy I could choke the life out of. Then I like him, then I want to kill him. But he really knows how to play it. You know, he always goes against what everybody else is saying on the show. Anyways. Chappelle went to the meeting and said, I'm not bluffing. Who he lives in Yellow Springs. Told the village council, the comedian starts speaking. There's a clip. Do we have him saying it? No.

What are they talking about? Around the 42 minute mark in the video below. I will take, no, I will take it all off the table, Chappelle said, before abruptly walking away from the microphone. So he doesn't want the

fucking, you know, he doesn't want the riff-raff. He's trying to keep up his 10,000 acres with sheep and horses and fucking P. Diddy's nephew making a

video of fucking hookers and shit. What am I saying? They live in beautiful neighborhoods, don't they? Anyway, Chappelle's going to take his shit and go home. Give me the fucking money. You hear me? You hear me? I got to come here and bust my body.

Give me the fucking money. Following the pushback from Chappelle and others, the council voted to revert back to an original zoning plan that excluded an affordable housing component. Nobody's gonna cry racism. The report said a source close to Chappelle told the Daily Mail that the comedian supports affordable housing. I love how they have to get in this because he's black but actually opposes both residential development plans in his hometown. I'm with you. That's affordable housing? It looks it. Imagine Chappelle looks out his window in the morning and the fucking dirty clothes hanging from the house next to him. Good morning, my neighbors. Hey, fuck you. Take it easy, Dave. Chappelle also objected. You notice you're not going to see this story much on the mainstream

because it doesn't make them look that good. Chappelle also objected to the original plan at a December council meeting. They brought it up and he said, he has yet to publicly explain his stance. No, I think he made it clear. He has yet to publicly explain his stance. No, I think he made it clear. He worked his ass off and doesn't want the scum that ruins most cities hanging out in his whatever. It's pretty clear.

It's very American, by the way. You do know the libs want to do that, too. And again, it doesn't affect their lives one iota because they all live in gated mansions or brownstones in DC They want to put the riffraff in your neighborhood They were trying it up in Westchester County, New York where I was fucking living They said it was too white literally My town was mentioned in an article in the New York Times saying it the county was too white and they were thinking about putting

Lucking the guy that ran it the Commissioner of Westchester County sky Rob asked arena. He goes you ain't putting that shit here He had nine different loopholes that he was going to use to keep... And there were black people who make good money living a mile from me who don't want it either. It's these fucking know-it-all cocksuckers who use us like a petri dish with their social experience. Again, they're never affected on a day-to-day basis by it. It's just leave us the fuck alone. You're really

asking for it. We're trying to be patient with you, but the gloves are about to come off. You know, if a thousand people charged a school board meeting and just brawled, I mean like a thousand parents whipping chairs and bottles.

Sure they got a door, right? Didn't you learn anything from the George Floyd riots? Oh that's right, you have to be black to do that and walk away. I'm sorry. It's a violent country, isn't it? I'm reading the notes, I can't even read it to my wife, you know. I'm like, yeah, this AIDS woman just gets, I don't want to hear it. The world's so horrible. Oh, yeah. Stick your head in the sand. I said, you carrying that fucking gun you bought? She pulled it off and put it in my mouth

and said, how do you like that? Yeah, I am, bitch. What are you doing? Nothing. Give me the remote. You made your point, honey. Okay. School board smackdown. Oh, these school board meetings. Remember now, most parents are considered to be domestic terrorists by school boards and their bosses and Joe Biden and the rest of you liberal fucks who someday will die of cancer. I hope it's probably a week from now. Viral video showed a group of Virginia students serving a lawsuit to the worst county in the country,

the Loudoun County School Board. You remember that one where the girl got raped in the bathroom by a trans kid and the fucking dad tried to speak up at the meeting and the cops tackled him. You know, that county that hid the rape. Anyways, the kids, students, served the lawsuit to the county school board over its mask mandates.

Delivered at a meeting on Tuesday, the students were seen carrying piles of affidavits into the chamber as parents cheered. Take a look here at the video. You are being served a legal document. You are being served a legal document. here at the video. Look at them. It's like a bank. They're all in plastic booths.

You fucking pussies. I hope those affidavits were laced with some type of fucking white powder. Look at them. Ugh! Hey! Teacher, leave them kids alone. Anyhow, according to the Loudon Times-Mirror, the affidavits were presented after a speaker claimed that the school division failed to respond to a February 2nd notice of

maladministration and demand to cease and desist enforcing what they said are unconstitutional mandates on the students, which is exactly good for you kids. Good for you. Don't take no shit off nobody. Even, do you believe it? And here's the other thing, you understand, this is officially over, even Fauci said it's pretty much, you're

still gonna have people wearing masks. Do you understand they'd like it? There are people out there who like to be told what to do, pushed around. I know I dated two of them. Boy, they like to be pushed around. No. But seriously, it'll still be virtue signaling. It'll be fuck you. That has just become a fuck you Republican. That's what that represents.

So we're the dumb rubes who don't know, follow the science. Meanwhile, all the Dems now are jumping on board. What the Santas did, what all the, you did, even Noem, what's her name, Christy Noem in Dakota, a spokesperson for the school board confirmed that the affidavits were delivered and that they would be examined. Yeah, sure they were. Upon delivery, Chair Jeff Morse called for an immediate recess. Oh, did you? Did you go out and play kickball, you fucking chooch?

at recess. Oh, did you? Did you go out and play kickball? You fucking chooch. Speaking to Newsmax, students said that the mask, the sexual assaults, and everything that county has done wrong led to the affidavits. There's somebody, I'm guaranteeing,

one of those kids, or there's a few parents who are lawyers, I'm guessing, and said, let's fucking, you know what I mean? And again, they were probably Democrats until it hits home to their family. Now it's time to stand up. It felt good finally serving them after, you know, being suspended. 11-year-old Ryan Mobley, who was suspended in school for not wearing a mask, said on Eric Bolling's The Balance Show.

So you could tell, he says, they were very flustered. This 11-year-old kid, he's pretty perceptive. Very flustered, annoyed, and they just didn't know what to do. Sort of like me in the back of my dad's car with my girlfriend, Sharon, he added. No. Said student, oh, it's Caroline Thomas. Good for you, sweetie. I wasn't nervous at all. The passion for this change to happen overcame all my fear. Good for you, kids. Republican Lieutenant Governor Winsome Sears. I love this woman.

This is the woman who's from originally like Nigeria and shit. You look at her and you probably think, oh, BLM. She's ready to charge a CBS. No. She is a right-winger who believes in the First Amendment. You ever hear her? She's tremendous. There's a black woman I'd put on the ticket, by the way, if she carries the gun the whole time. Winsome Sears. She praised the students for their civic engagement. She said, I don't know what I was doing at their age, but that, well, you're in Nigeria somewhere, probably chasing a fucking zebra with a knife. No, you know, Nick, there's no need to say that. I'm going to keep saying it

until somebody notices me. But that wasn't it, Sears said. My God, these kids are going to make sure that their government listens to them. See, she gets it. I'd like to see more of her on, you know, talk shows and stuff. She's really, as Biden says, she's clean, articulate, you know. It's an American dream. What a racist piece of shit he is. Nobody calls him on it. Oh, my God, help us. Let's lighten the mood, huh?

I like light stories that make us feel better. Dead woman sitting at dinner table. That's all I put was dead woman sitting. This is from Italy, by the way. I read this one. Boy, I had a good chuckle. I read this one, boy, I had a good chuckle. Just dying at the table. The decomposed body of a 70-year-old Italian woman was found sitting where else? At the dinner table. You sure she's dead? She's not fucking waiting for a stromboli to come out of the oven. She was there for more than two years after she died. You goddamn guineas really

make me laugh. Grammy passed the bread. Grammy! Police made the grim discovery after going to Maranella Barrares home in Prestino near Lake Cuomo in northern Italy. Why didn't Cloney drop it and check on her, you prick? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Anybody there? Echo!

She's a. They were carrying out a house call, the police, to warn Beretta that... What a great name for an Italian, Beretta. There she is, seen there in better times. How long was she dead in that picture? That looks like Jen Psaki in about five years. They were carrying out a house call to warn Beretta that high wind forecasts for the region could potentially uproot her neglected trees in her back. You know, again, that's too much government, too. Don't worry about her. Even though she's been dead, nobody checked on her. You know, we had in West

Chester County, we had an old lady in a house next to us. Not right on top of us, but with an eye distance across our yard. All of a sudden, one day, cops pulled up. We knew this cop, Mike Scully. Cops, ambulance, and shit. Then you saw the ambulance leave, putting somebody in nothing, no lights on. You're like, uh-oh. She was like 90-something. Then we talked to the cop.

He goes, we go over there. She's in a nightgown. She's covered in her own shit. He said there's boxes of mail from like 1980, not even opened. Cat shit everywhere. Bags of cat shit piled like six feet high. He goes, I walked towards her. She's coming to me. This sounds like a nightmare.

In her nightgown with like shit all over her hands. She falls behind the couch. Of course, I'm crying while he's telling me this stuff. And yeah, and then she died. But, you know, Nick, now why didn't you check on her? I didn't like her.

No. We did, but we never saw her. We never saw her come out of the house. What am I going to, well, you could knock on the, no, fuck that. We, anyways, rest her soul. At least she wasn't sitting at the table waiting for some garlic bread or some fucking shit. Neighbors said they last saw the elderly woman on a dirt bike jumping over buses in her backyard. What? In September of 2019,

it assumed she had moved away at the start of the COVID-19 pandemic. Well, that's true. You don't see her anymore. I don't know. I like people who keep to themselves. So what? She died.

The sad part is, no family. Based on the level of decay of the lasagna, the investigators said it tasted at least two years old. No. Investigators estimated she had been dead for more than two years. That's the rookie in the corner throwing up his first.

The sergeant's like, what's the matter, kid? You never smell a dead body before? He goes, no, that's fucking goat cheese. I hate that. Yesterday, I showed you guys a clip. I guess they've passed a law where black and brown people can shoplift legally and steal shit. Why you and I are following the laws for anything is beyond me. But I'm not joking around. I'm looking at cities and they are allowed to steal shit.

I don't see follow-up stories where they go, oh, they went to the house and returned the shit and arrested them. No. Black and brown people, this is what you got by a stolen election, putting this jerk up in who's representing the far left. This is their dream. And remember, all this is intentional. I'm going to say it again. They want to upend the society as we know it.

So I watch these TV shows, and I'm like, do these guys, are they serious when they go, what are the Democrats doing? What are they thinking? What are you talking about? They're executing a plan to destroy the society. Don't grade kids on tests, put in somebody who's based on skin color on the Supreme. Everything that made this country defund the police, it's all part of the plan, folks. Don't get, now I'm giggling when I watch this shit.

And then the people on TV have to pretend they don't know what's going on. I can't believe they tried this. Anyways, I showed you a clip. Here's another sign of a society, really the end of society as we fucking know it. It was a clip yesterday of a guy stealing steaks in New York from Trader Joe's. Let's take a look at that. That's an employee watching him walk away. Did you pay for any of that?

Yeah. You did? Yeah. You ever see? Yeah. That's something they were chasing you in there. The that? Yeah. You did? Yeah. You got a receipt? Yeah. How come they were chasing you there? They wanted the basket. What?

They wanted the basket. Oh, they wanted the basket. Okay. Oh. Was that the employee asking? I'm an employee? You got a receipt. The kid goes, yeah.

Well, go. Well, show me. Yeah. If you're an employee and you give a fuck, I don't know, it's not your job either. If there's no security, they go, fuck it, take the sticks. What is going on? Now, if I saw that, I said to Andy, my wife, not, you know, not my life partner, Andy, the male one. I said, if I saw that on the news and I lived in that, I would go there right the next day as a white person and see what would happen. Just, you know, it's a little test.

If they bust me, I'll go, no, I'm just doing a social experiment to see if you're applying the law equally. So, sure enough, it wasn't me. up, it wasn't me. A day after this guy was seen walking out with a butt full of stolen meat from Trader Joe's in Manhattan, another thief has been recorded striking the location. That's what

these idiots do. I get more respect for the first guy than this jack-off. Because this guy, first of all, they're going to interview him on the sidewalk, and you need a translator. Could you understand a fucking? Unbelievable. But watch him sticking, you know, Hillary's hot sauce down his fucking pants.

Take a look at this. He knows it's being filmed. I see you took a couple of things out of your pocket. Did you pay for them? No, I wouldn't have to. You don't for them? No, I wouldn't have to, you know? You don't have to? No, I wouldn't have to. I don't have to.

I used to do all the time, you know? Not stealing, not having any relief, you know? Right. Yeah. So you kind of feel okay. Did you hear his mentality, which could only come from years and years of Democrat policy? He goes, I used to have a job.

I worked and shit. I didn't have to steal. Oh, so it's society's fault. Go ahead. No, that's it. That's it. Oh, that's it. Good.

Piece of shit. I don't like your jerk-off name. I don't like your jerk-off face. I don't like your jerk-off behavior. And I don't like you, jerk off. He had every excuse in the book. I used to have an EBT card. I don't get it. I don't see anybody that works at the store trying to start. I don't get it. Who tells the store owner don't do anything? Seriously, are you getting local politicians? Well, I don't get it. Who tells the store owner don't do anything? Seriously, is that, are you getting local politicians?

Well, I don't get it. The unnamed man seen here sticking adobo and black pepper in his pants. East 14th Street. Oh, that makes, I understand. The location, shoving two cans of soda in his pants. Naturally, he goes for the quality shit. Imagine you're stealing sodas. Then he goes strolling out like the Mama Lukey is.

I don't have to, he says like a three-year-old. That was a post photographer asking him the questions, by the way. Oh, God, help me. Anybody going to do anything? The man told the Post he's unemployed, uses EBT to buy food. On Tuesday, a so-called Hamburglar walked out the, oh, that's cute. Only in New York they give them cute names and encourage it. Walked out of the doors of the same store with 10 packages of meat in his arms. That's the guy we showed. Frustrated workers said they were barred by their employer from stopping

the man because they don't want to get sued. This is what happens when you live under the threat of lawsuits in such a litigious society. It's coming apart at the seams. They were told not to stop the man. He's being sought by cops. Oh yeah, I'm sure they're kicking doors in

all over the fucking Bronx. Manhattan's DA, that stupid idiot who they hired because he's being sought by cops. Oh yeah, I'm sure they're kicking doors in all over the fucking Bronx. Manhattan's DA, that stupid idiot who they hired because he's black, Alvin Bragg. This is the guy that wants to make felonies, misdemeanors, and fucking armed robbery, you know, a $50 fine, shit like that. Manhattan's DA, Alvin Bragg, said Wednesday, listen to this, listen to the logic here.

This is fucking astoundingly stupid. He said, when his office trying to figure out how to stop people who are really going store to store and just taking things, like it's a new phenomenon. How do you stop that? Oh, Jesus. Let's have 10 meetings before we make a... Can you fucking imagine? Think about that. Oh, my God. I think your brain is going soft.

How we can kind of, he says, aggregate that conduct. Here come the 50-cent words. Aggregate that conduct and so charge it at a higher... So we can charge it at a higher level when appropriate. Anybody hearing this ignorance? Overcomplicating something beyond fucking belief? This is how you stop it. You take the shit back.

You put them in jail. I don't care if it's for a day or two. Whatever the fuck. That's how. Oh, Nick, you can't do that. Yeah, you can. More prisons. More jails, I say. This is the new DA

in New York. You people. Anyways. Think that one out, Mr. Bragg. It's a real fucking enigma. It's a real rental shoplifting. It's been going on forever. How do we

stop it? He goes, people, you know, the ones that are going from store to store, as opposed to what? Ones that take shit and then wait the next day to come back to a different store? That's all right. What are you talking about? Alvin Shithead. Chipmunk. Fuckstain.

Anyways, that's it for the week folks. I feel terrific. Why'd I put gray on? Can I look any fucking older? I look like the fucking embalmer we were talking about earlier. Look like a Barney Miller character. You guys probably too young for the best shows ever. Look like a Barney Miller character. You guys are probably too young for one of the best shows ever. That is it for the weekend, ladies and gentlemen, because it's Thursday. I was going to say I'm going to go home and cut the grass. We don't have grass in front of my house. What is that shit, Dallas?

You're not from here. It's like a vine bush. Yeah, it's like a vine bush. Last time I heard that, I was at a bikini waxing. Listen, folks. A nice immature bush joke to end the week. Don't forget nickdip.com. Hit my tour button.

I'm next month. I'm going out on the road again, apparently, because the wife has a Coke problem, and I need a new refrigerator. What the fuck else? The Comics Gym. Thecomicsgym.com. Is anybody signing up?

Am I seeing the numbers go up? They don't let me see the numbers, the people behind the scenes. I don't know who they are. Actually, I live with them, and they still don't let me see the numbers. Thecomicsgym and cameo.com, which I love doing. If you want somebody roasted, a friend, relative, or whoever, go to Cameo.com.

Tell me a little about the person. I'll make a video on my phone roasting them or just being, it doesn't have to be a roast, whatever. I can say happy bar mitzvah, whatever the fuck you want. All right? It's terrific. People, the kids love it. Oh, yeah guitar solo Outro Music