The Nick DiPaolo Show - Special Master Request Approved | Nick Di Paolo Show #1268

Episode Date: September 6, 2022

Special Master to be selected. FBI's crooked cop. FLA man arrested for stalking 6 year old. Nirvana law suit. Carnival ride goes "south". Soros strikes again.

The Rise Goes On In Big House Now

You Know Where It Goes Sweet Fuck Out

Of This World And Stop The Rise Goes

On I'm out. Music Hey, how are you? Good to be with you. Hope you had a great Labor Day weekend. Great show for you tonight. We got Judd Hirsch, funny Jew from Taxi, and another unfunny Jew, Barbara Streisand. What a bitch, but let's admit, she can sing. Nice tits. And this dwarf, Mason Reese.

He does the devil hand commercials and has some type of disease if you hug him he breaks like pixie sticks should be a good one anyways we'll do it live okay we'll do it live it do it live i can i'll write it and we'll do it live thing sucks I'll write it and we'll do it live! Fucking thing sucks! Mr. DiPaolo, no one could be as nasty as you pretend to be unless they really wanted to be disliked. Here's one for you, Dallas. That's Bob Newhart.

You like that? Yeah? Here you go. If you like that. You know, Mr. DiPaolo, I'm really proud of you. You should be. I've had quite a life. Quite a life, I'll tell you. God, I was just thinking about that when I'm dead. I'm like, okay, what did I do? Played some football in college.

Drank a lot. Chase Brods became a comic for 30-something years and died. Strike three, you're out. You got caught looking, bitch. Me fuck you and your bone spurs. Who you talking to, you fucking chooch? All right, folks. Hope you had a great Labor Day weekend. I know I didn't. No, I did. It was fine.

It was college football, dude. It was the opening weekend. Oh, my, my. Folks, again, every year I plead with you people who are NFL. You do both. I like both. But college football, oh, my God, there's nothing like it. Nothing like it.

Anyways, yeah, I watched a ton of that shit. it anyways yeah I watched a ton of that shit and learned almost the whole main solo to American Woman and the riff I'll tell you I'm taking this on the road you guys will come out to see me I'm gonna be opening for myself if this keeps up I know the neighbors are enjoying it. Look out the window. There's like 11 windows. What are you going to do? Hey, make sure to join me on Patreon

to get extra stories each day. It's called the Nick DiPaolo Show Encore. Today I'll be talking about crime. We have a clip of a woman pushing a stroller somewhere in Australia, and guess somebody comes up and just, you know, beats her up. I'll let you guess the nationality and whatnot, but apparently it's a global problem. You'll also get access to all the past shows, including the encore shows, discounts on merchandise, and more.

past shows, including the encore shows, discounts on merchandise, and more. Visit patreon.com slash the Nick DiPato Show to sign up today. Real quick, I just read this as we were coming on the air. I know you guys must have all saw Biden's speech. It's too old to talk about, but, you know, calling us fucking Nazis and anybody who's a Trump supporter just should be taken out and flogged and fucking arrested. And I'm not even exaggerating. That's how biased and creepy this motherfucker was with a background like he was Lucifer. It was weird. Basically declaring civil war on half the population and just standing out there going,

they tried to stop a fair election, 81 people. No, you fucking, how dare you? Anyways, the reaction to that speech went over like a fart in a space helmet, as they used to say in the 40s. My father thought that was hilarious. 56% of general election voters view President Biden's speech where he cast Republicans as threats to the foundation of a republic as unacceptable. That was Tuesday, a Trafalgar Group poll found. The poll asked respondents, what is your opinion of President Biden's recent primetime address to the nation in which he accused his political opponents of representing an extremism that threatens the very foundations of our republic can you fucking imagine him

looking into the camera and saying that as he weaponizes the doj against trump and any civilian i mean they're responsible for people getting canceled if they say something wrong. Having control over the media, whether social media or the television channels, and we're a threat to the democracy, it's insane. I know he doesn't mean it. Somebody's putting it. It sounds like it's coming out of the squad's mouth to me or anybody that far. 56 say the speech represents a dangerous in rhetoric. It is designed to incite conflict amount. Listen to this sentence. Let me fucking read this again. 56 say, you mean 56% the speech, and then quotes, represents a dangerous in rhetoric

and is designed to incite conflict amounts Americans. Oh, you know what? I was going to say they must have been quoting Biden, but no. So I don't want people to think I'm retarded at home. We have eight-year-old girls coming out of junior colleges doing the journalism now. Or guys. Ah, suck a dick. Only 35% say the speech was acceptable campaign messaging, and that is to be expected in an election year.

Nearly 8% have no opinion. So it's acceptable to 35% of you fucking morons. You are the useful idiots. If we could ever commit kind of a controlled genocide on you, 35%. You don't want what's best for the country. You just want to win. You want your side to win. May you all get cancer and die in a house fire, something like that. Moreover, nearly 20% of Democrats viewed the speech negatively.

I'll repeat that. Even 20% of Democrats saw the speech negatively. I'll repeat that. Even 20% of Democrats saw the speech as negative. 62% of independents agreed that it represented a, no, that, independents, I still say, my buddy Gutfeld's saying there will not be a red wave, and I'm saying it's going to be a tsunami, like, sticking to it 62 percent of independents agree that it if it's a fair thing it represented a dangerous in rhetoric it is it represented a dangerous in rhetoric again what the does anybody pro-freed and is designed to incite conflict amounts americans didn't i already say that? 89% of Republicans oppose the speech.

The poll sampled 1,084 likely election voter dwarfs who are black with one leg. From September 2 to 5, with a 2.9% margin of error. Yeah, you throw in the fucking grammatic mistake, it's 12.8. What the fuck? Anyways, what an evil speech. Nobody's ever, no American president ever gave a speech like that.

And talked about his fellow countrymen like that. You've, it fucking, again, I always said, don't put, you know, politics ahead of your friends and shit, but if you're back on that shit, I always said, don't put politics ahead of your friends and shit, but if you're back on that shit, I've got problems with you. Okay?

Even though I don't have any friends, so. Ooh. That was beautiful. All right. I just wanted to get that out of the way. That wasn't even the first story. That was sort of a bonus thing for you. Tell Barbara Streisand we don't have any green tea in the green room of the twat.

All right. Let's get on with it. Headline, special master. A federal judge on Monday granted former President Donald Trump, what do you mean former, request that a special master, you know, like fucking Larry Hagman, Major Nelson, review items the FBI sees from Trump's Mar-a-Lago residence. It also halted the Department of Justice's use of the items for investigative purposes. Yes, sir.

Finally, we win one, right? What is she? Look at the judge. She's a Trump appointee. The court's in session now. Here come the judge. All right. Here come the judge.

Trump's like, what do you got under the robe? I saw her tits. U.S. District Judge Eileen Cannon. A Trump appointee judge ruled that a special master will be appointed to review the seized items to determine if any are personal items or items subject to claims of attorney-client privilege or executive privilege. I heard they took his old thigh master. Cannon also ruled that Department of Justice must suspend its use of Trump's items for investigative purposes while the special master conducts its review.

I love that title. Bad news, Dems. But also noted that the office of the director of national intelligence could continue its classification review and or intelligence assessment. She added that there was a risk of the Department of Justice leaking materials, we know that's true, that would cause harm to the former president. You can't argue with that. That's right, bitch.

You got him on the document. In addition to being deprived of potentially significant personal documents, which alone creates a real harm, plaintiff faces an unquantifiable potential harm by way of improper disclosure of sensitive... Gee, I wonder why they think that might happen. This fucking administration leaks like somebody fill it in. nine-year-old guy at three in the morning. Good night, everybody. Information to the public. The decision comes after the DOJ objected to Trump's request for the

special master. The judge also gave both sides until September 9, that's like Friday, to propose candidates for the position of special master. I wonder who they're going to pick. I think Rob Reiner was their first.

Then Barbra Streisand. Anyways, yeah, so he won that one. So let's see. Why would you have a problem with that? You know? I don't know what to believe though you read both sides something today somebody on the right so they they don't have they have it it it was phrased like not word on the street but something like that an inside source they have said they have

hardly nothing or whatever i don't know what to believe but it's all cooked up anyways i don't give a shit if he's got nuclear codes and whatever the fuck. Until Hillary goes to jail, I'm going to keep yapping. End of story. Throw the thick dot and fucking... They were chanting that. He had a rally this week, Trump, and they were chanting that.

And then some lefties on Twitter had a problem with that. They don't want to put Trump in jail, but they're chanting. See if you can figure out the difference. Shit for brains. Let's move on. What's this one called? What's the title of this one? Anyways, crooked cop, maybe? Former FBI Hunter Biden point man, Timothy Tebow, we talked about him last week, reportedly buried information from Tony Bobulinski about the Biden family business scheme with a now bankrupt CCP-linked energy company. The guy that ran that, the Chinese fella, he ain't been seen in a while.

I think he might have gone to jail or he'd go bye-bye. The deal included 10% held by H for the big guy. A lot of people thought they were talking about Hunter's cock. As you know, recently he said he has a nine-inch cock. Anyways, the big guy who Bobulinski says is President Joe Biden. Well, you had to be a real detective to fucking put that together. If that's a fact. It is. Tell me, am I lying?

Bobulinski, who personally met with Joe Biden at the Red Lobster, had to help him with his bib while he shit his pants and had a roll. Had a roll. Had a roll in the... In 2017, for an hour to discuss... He actually met with Biden to discuss the family business. Never tell Hunter what the doodles can. Look what I did to my boy. They took a crack pipe out of his mouth.

Business plan. I can just see. It'll be funny. Hunter all days and Joe brings it to the, you know. Use all your powers. Lifts up the blanket. He's getting the body. Look how the mess is getting my boy. Picture of, I don't know, there's a knife with Ted Cruz's name on the handles. I'm just freewheeling up here.

Tony Bobulinski looks like an SNL character, don't he? He looks like a college football coach at a banquet. Yeah, Big Ten guy. That's exactly what he looks like. He can't believe his transfer just left for Jacksonville State. Anyways, business plans with the Chinks, you know that.

Reportedly gave the FBI three cell phones with encrypted messages between him and the business partners, the New York Post reported Sunday. Bobulinski also handed over to the Bureau emails and financial documents detailing the Biden family's corrupt influence peddling operation in foreign countries during Joe being vice president back then. Counselor! Under fucking the Marxist Obama mama. Counselor! Okay? back then under fucking the Marxist Obama. Okay. So it's not like he turned, they have any evidence

to prove that Biden's compromised. Just texts and emails and, you know, interviews with guys who actually. So if you guys on the left believe that that last election, like you don't believe in all the vote harvesting and all that crap that the left and you say it's on the up and up. Well, this part of it, when they buried this story, which would have changed the election, even people on the left admit it. They took a poll. So it was rigged one way or another. So kiss my leathery nipples. A 2017 email from Hunter Biden's laptop revealed a business deal between Bobulinski, the Biden family, and the Luchases. High-ranking members of the Chinese Communist Party would include 10 percent, again, hell, by H, uh, Howard, uh, for the big guy. Bobulinski has confirmed the reference to the big guy in the much-publicized May 13, 2017 email was, in fact, reference to the old teaser himself, Joe Biden.

After the interview, Bobulinski and his lawyer were given Thiebaud's cell phone number. This guy here, remember they said he was going to be the appointment at the FBI thereafter. That night, Bobulinski's lawyer phoned Thiebaud, who said he would soon advise on next steps and whether Bobulinski should do a follow-up interview. I mean, listen to how fucking out in the open this is. Yet Bobulinski and his lawyer never heard. They never heard from Thiebaud ever again. Would you believe that shit?

The report revealed. It should be noted Bobulinski was reportedly, listen to this, never invited to testify before the Delaware grand jury probing Hunter. No, that's ignorant. But he's on the up and up, you people who vote Democrat. I know you're not watching the show, but people who are, spread it to your fucking lip jerk offer. If you're still hanging out with him.

Though Joe Biden and his staff have claimed seven times the president has had no part in the family business, I don't know what you're talking about. He has been involved in at least 17 instances. This guy's going to die in the causeway in Jersey at the toll booth like Sonny did. 58% of voters believe that Joe Biden has played a role in his family business. Only 58%. See, I don't even believe this either. 60% say Hunter Biden has sold influence and access to the president. Biden. Hunter Biden. What is that from?

I don't know. I think it's a Chinese restaurant in Beijing and Hunter came in and that was the chef telling all the straighten up. Who's there? Hunter Biden. Yeah. Anyhow. But can you imagine that sweeping that under the rug and I'm still we have we had huge news last week when when remember when what's-his-name Mark

Zuckerberg said the FBI came to the him and said you know keep an eye out for buh-buh-buh and that's what I just went said, well, why didn't you come out and say the FBI told me? Anyways. Yeah, good answer. He's part of the government, too. Honest to God, he is. It's creepy. I guess when you're that smart, he's part of that creepy Bilderberg group. He might be a new member. Folks, don't forget this show is entirely supported by you, the listeners, and a couple of Asian girls in the late teens. Thank you to those who joined on Patreon in the past week and those who made contributions. Please continue to do so, and I'll promise I'll keep working to spread honest

and direct comedy and commentary through the show. You can contribute at nickdip.com, and I'll read your name on the show. You can contribute at nickdip.com and I'll read your name on the show. And I want to thank you guys very much for that. We had, I think, again, over the weekend, we get a bunch of new people. It's growing, growing like a lump in Pelosi's armpit. Let's keep our fingers crossed. No, no, no, no! In our FLA segment tonight,

a Florida man was arrested Saturday after allegedly stalking a six-year-old girl. Didn't know Dallas lived in Florida. Telling her he would make her famous and turn her into a big girl, which is what Tommy said to me when I met him, my manager. Are you stealing lines?

You're a crumb creep. Oh, Tommy, you're stealing people's lines. Mark Greenberg, 55. Mark that one down. That was a good one. Greenberg, look at him. At least he doesn't look like a pedophile. He's got like dry jizz of 12 Cub Scouts in that beard. That's not even a beard, that's dry jizz. Mark Greenberg, 55, of Deltona, is accused of at least 11, is this a Florida story? At least 11 incidents over the past eight months. Really? And he's not locked up or what kind of incidents? Pickleball? What do

you mean? Pickleball, that sounds dirty. Over the past eight months in which he harassed neighbors, yelled at them and their kids with a megaphone, so he's a male cheerleader, and drove past houses while recording children on his phone. Hey, who hasn't done that? You see a nice ass out there, you know, they're playing hopscotch. Come on. That's gross. Who said that? Yeah, but I was only kidding.

Ah, come on. It's freedom, baby, yeah. Several witnesses gave deputies similar accounts of greenberg's comments to the child including that he said he was going to pick her up and take her to disney world again tommy used that to get me to sign to the sheriff's the girl's father said greenberg's comments had gotten progressively worse and more frequent and that his daughter was afraid to go outside and what did you do about it dad i mean more than one time his daughter was afraid to go outside and what did you do about it dad i mean more than one time this guy's talked to your daughter like that and you

didn't fucking hand him his head you big girl am i missing the point here that boy is a p-i-g pig come on he likes kids let's take a look at uh we have the video Listen to what a psycho Absorb Narcissist Wearing about his shoes It's creepy It's fucking creepy Go ahead

You made a f***ing poor decision Now you're going to live with it We're trying to help you out man We're getting your shoes These are not shoes These are flip flops It doesn't matter They're going to put slides on you

When you get out there Can I please have my Skechers? I have bad feet. Pause. I think Skechers has a new spokesperson. When you're standing in a trench coat near a middle school for eight hours, you want your feet to feel comfortable. Can I have my Skechers, please? Go ahead. I have to sketches, please? Go ahead.

I have to have shoes on. That's why I stay at home all day on my internet. I have to have my shoes on. Sorry. Give me, sir, please. No. No. Oh, my God.

This guy's about to go to jail forever and he's wearing a bunch of shoes. What am I saying? He'll probably be out in 10 minutes. Huh? That's true. On Thursday and Friday, Greenberg was seen taking pictures outside the girl's grandmother's house

in another neighborhood where the little girl visits. The sheriff's office said, what? He doesn't look crazy what the fuck there's a show called gentle ben back in the 70s the family believed greenberg followed someone there to the grandmother's house because he's never been invited there really that was a dumb line in this story you didn't invite the guy who's trying to touch your granddaughter her Her little... Invited there and had no reason to know where the grandmother lives. Apparently he thinks it's a meat market over there.

Deputies obtained a warrant and took Greenberg into custody without an incident on Saturday. Without an incident? They had a fucking verbal exchange about shoes. Greenberg faces a charge of aggravated stalking of a person under the age of 16. The

Belusa County Branch Jail. They're asking for $5,000. They gave him a $5,000 bond. That's kind of low, isn't it? Am I missing something there? Five grand? How about that?

I'll take it at this. Boy, they know how to. Girl goes, I'm not going to Disney World. That shit is so 70s back. Anyways, I hope you're rot in hell and you know what they do to. Like he would be dead. Imagine you're a little kid, Dallas, if you were a kid, or even your daughter,

and you saw a guy, you'd be in jail right now. I would be, because he'd be dead. I actually believe that. My dad, too. Hi. Next story. This was a fun one, a little sugar to let the hard stories go down judge tells plaintiff never mind

a federal court boy this is only an American story a litigious society where hey let's throw some shit against the wall see how much it sticks a federal court in California has dismissed a lawsuit alleging

that the cover artwork of Rock Band Nirvana's 1991 album, Nevermind, constituted child pornography. That's all I read and I went, you gotta be. Spencer Eldon, even then I'm like, it can't be the guy who's in the picture. He can't think this is Spencer Eldon, 31, who appeared naked on the album cover. How'd they pick him, by the way? I think they had Greenberg, the guy in the last story, say, what do you like here? The album cover, this is the kid who was the baby on that album cover.

He sued the band over alleged commercial child sex exploitation? Get the fuck out of here. Hey, little boy. You want to make some money? Candy. I did a, for my second CD I put out, I did a similar, yeah. That album sold well. It went styrofoam.

Poo-poo. However, his lawsuit was dismissed on Friday when a judge ruled that Eldon had filed his complaint after the 10-year statute of limitations had expired. You don't look that up before you file the suit, you nimrod. Accordingly, plaintiff's action will be dismissed without leave to amend, said Fernando M. Alguin, United States District Judge for the Central District of Calabonia,

in a ruling today obtained by CNN. So it must be true. Look at the kid he actually made money off. This is the kid who actually tried to, what a weasel, huh? Can I ask you a question? Is there any society that has less character than Americans right now? We are a mentally ill, just as Bill Hicks said, a third world consumer plantation, a melting pot that's not melting on the verge of, it is, I don't know. I'd still rather live here than Canada. A melting pot that's not melting on the verge of, it is, I don't know. I'd still rather live here than Canada. Eldon's lawyer told CNN he plans to appeal the dismissal.

Okay, F. Lee Bailey, good luck with that. The cover of Nevermind on which the infant Eldon appeared, swimming underwater, his eyes fixed on a dollar bill, has become one of the most enduring images in rock music. And you should be grateful you dink. In the original complaint filed August 24th. 2021. Eldon's attorney said there was some shrinkage. His dick was much bigger than the.

Said the image was pornographic. And that he has suffered. Here's where I started laughing. Lifelong damages. As a result of his involvement. Can you imagine. Will you shut up. Fucking lawyers should be shot. Will you please shut up. Can you imagine fucking lawyers being shot?

Eldon listed the surviving band members, the executive of lead singer Kurt Cobain's estate, and various record labels as defendants. After the complaint was dismissed, a second amended complaint sought damages for what Eldon called, and I quote, lifelong loss of income earning capacity. Sounds like to me he just didn't exploit it the right way. That's exactly right. He could have signed autographs and shit from the age of two to, what's the matter with you? What's the matter with you? What the fuck's the matter with you? What's the matter with you?

Loss of income earning capacity. Loss of past and future wages. I can see him trying to fill out an application at Wendy's. Like, were you the baby on the fucking... Get out of here! You fucking pervert. Future wages. Past and future expenses for medical

and psychological treatment. Do I have this right? They put you on an album cover. They didn't actually fuck you as a baby, right? How do I get it wrong? Loss of enjoyment of life. Blame that on your wife. And other losses to be described and proven at the trial of this matter.

What you just said oh my god what is one of the most insanely idiotic things i have ever heard everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it may god have mercy on your soul amen sister-in-law the lawsuit alleged that eldon was sexualized because oh my god you what's scarier to me is that a lawyer took this. You know what I mean? Now we're really getting, at least, and a lawyer's always had a bad reputation, whatever, sharks, you know how they are. But I gotta believe, even 20 years, a lawyer go, what are you, nuts? There's no case there. And now you got this new generation that, during the day, they have their only fans page.

That Eldon was sexualized because of the image of the naked baby grabbing at the dollar bill. Made the baby resemble a sex worker. You're a loser. You'll always be a loser. What kind of sex worker gets paid a dollar for showing his ding-a-ling? So the only good thing that happened to this kid in his life, you could actually argue the only positive thing, and he turns it into...

And I agree with you. He could have used it in a smarter way. He should have taken one. Here's what he should have done, or his parents, whoever. They should have redid the cover every, yeah, well, every like five years. So you see his dick getting bigger and bigger until there's a lawsuit. You guys, you blew it. Hey, I haven't played that one in a long time.

Hey, guys, make plans. Oh, my God, the weekend's here. I've been talking about this for months, right, since May going, oh, that's a long way off. I gotta get on a plane on Friday. I hope I remember how to do fucking stand-up. Hey guys, make plans to come and see me on the road. I got puppets and unicycles.

Here are my upcoming stand-up dates. This Friday, September 9th, Soul Joel's Comedy Club, Royersford, Pennsylvania. The next night, the 10th, Algonquin Arts Theater in Manasquan, New Jersey. And then the next night, the 11th of September, Sugarloaf Performing Arts Center in Chester, New York. Friday, the 11th, Palm Beach Kennel Club, West Palm Beach, Florida. Saturday, November 12th, Snappers. God, I hope you're right that they've known for their seafood.

Comedy Club, Fort Myers. Sunday, November 13th, Sidesplitters Comedy Club, Tampa, Florida. I'm not saying that might be it for me. I don't want to be Elton John and say farewell and come back every year. But wouldn't that be funny? That's where I close it out at Sidesplitters. That's actually perfect. I know I'm going to take a break. Let's put it that way. But that doesn't mean you guys are going to be

you know, I'm not going to you'll still be subject to my sense of humor through this. And it's about time I wrote a fucking book. But again, I have the attention span of a crack baby. I sit down, I write down three words and I hear, oh, it's time for college football. And then the other voice in my head is, you got to learn the rest of fucking knocking on heaven's door before you you know, shit like that. So I'm doing a Q&A at the Tampa

which, that might be appropriate. After the show I'll be doing a live Q&A. People who have VIP tickets. So grab those before they're gone and before I'm gone. You can get tickets to all these shows at nickdip.com. If you don't know that, you have a waterhead.

What goes around comes around. I'll tell you why. Round and round we're going around, comes around. I'll tell you why. Multiple people were injured. Everything I love. Every time it's India or some shit, I'm still waiting for the annual bus

off the cliff in India. That's like mandatory. I think it's a holiday. Every September 28th, a bus of kids goes off a cliff somewhere. Multiple people were injured after a carnival ride. I love these. I don't mean to make fun of people who

get hurt and die on them, but I do. Because I wouldn't get on that if your mother said she'd blow me on the way down. Or up. Meaning me, not the ride. Injured after a carnival ride, plummeted 50 feet in a freak accident in India. Yes, did my friend get hurt today? Did he tilt the world? friend get hurt today.

As seen in this nail-biting video showing the near death drop. One guy tried to get on the ride and luckily his life was spared. But you don't have opening? No. But why not?

Apparently it was already packed. The fiasco reportedly occurred Sunday night at the Phase 8 amusement. I bet of the Phase 4 and 5, they're mediocre. In Punjab's Mohali district, beautiful district over there. A lot of diarrhea. Well, 50 riders were on a drop tower, a carousel-like contraption that sends passengers hurtling. Anytime anything sends you hurtling through the air,

count me out. Down a vertical structure, the Hindustan Times reported, very good paper. I read the zodiacs in there. It's the year of the fucking legume. Things literally went south, however, after an unknown malfunction. I just picture a guy standing with a giant bolt, like, after me putting my wife's exercise bike together.

What the fuck is this guy? We're missing one. Yeah. Caused the attraction to plunge 50 feet. Basically, this is like an elevator falling. On to the base like a bro—yeah, like an elevator. Injuring 16 people. Let's take a look at this.

God, my worst nightmare. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Turns out nobody heard. Everybody's had the wind knocked at them. No, somebody died.

One person died. And I think who I know that person. Oh, no, that's on the next one I'm going to show you. This is what I look at at night, folks, if you wonder. I do. When I go to bed, I try to get in bed now by one. That's good for me. And what do I do? I pick up my phone and I, and you can, when somebody goes over my history, they're going

to think I'm insane. I look for rape stories, Holocaust shit. I'm not kidding you. I just find, I can't get over how sick humans are to other humans. You know what I mean? Shit like this, you know, tragic rides. I googled kids beheaded on a boat. Shit like that. Stuff that makes you sleep nice.

Anyways, they said they picked up the injured, rushed to the hospital, described an eyewitness named Jaspreet Kaur, per the Hindustan Times. He... Hindustan. Hindustan. He added... We have a problem, induced him.

He added that the fairground bounces. Bounces at a fairground? What the fuck? Ain't nobody touching that cotton candy unless you're paying for it. Tried to threaten them for intervening and that the organizers also, the people who ran the place, fucking fled the scene. Bye-bye. Oh my God. The victims, some who are as young as 10, can you imagine traumatic, reportedly receiving treatment at hospitals in the area. However, the extent of the injuries

remains unclear. Boy, there's a lot of unclear in reporting today. We don't know the death. We don't know this. By the way, I read about three athletes dropping dead again in the prime of their life. Remember I started complaining, what, about a year or two ago that they never tell you how? Then it just dawned on me, duh. Moderna and whatnot.

Listen to this. So they have this tragedy, right? This is the difference between India and America. They have this tragedy where everybody hurt, people died, but the fair will be extended until September 11th after originally being stated to end on Sunday. What the fuck? How hilarious. The owners probably went, I don't give a fuck.

We made tons of money. Build that thing again. Fix it. This is insane. So I said, let's take a look at some other rides that I would never get on. Look at this. Those are urinals. They're all peeing.

Oh, bye-bye. Oh, boy. Bye-bye. Oh, my God. That was horrible. Look at this one. The lady's going to fly off. Oh, God. There it is in slow motion.

Look at it. Bye-bye. Why couldn't that be Hillary landing right on a fucking, I don't know, a couple of trucks in a parking lot. That lady landed on a bunch of funnel cakes. She's fine. And then. Bye bye. Always buckle up, kids.

Would you ever in a third row... I don't even go on them here because... Once again, you guys know everything reminds me of Soprano episodes, right? And I know you Soprano people like me know this. There was one called The Ride.

They had like a San Gennaro's Feast and Pauly Walnuts was in charge of hiring the vendors, you know, to put the rides together and shit. And he went with the cheapest one. And Bobby Bacala, played by my friend Steve Scherippa, he's married to Tony. You guys know this. Tony's sister, Janice. Janice has a little baby.

They had a baby. They're on the ride and this ride breaks down. And this is when Bobby Bacala finds out that Pauly hired the cheapest. I just, I just like this scene. Go ahead. He wants to get rich, but you don't scrimp on safety. Mind your business, Bobby. My baby girl is in that car. You owe me money, Pauly. I owe you shit. My wife's got nerve damage. Fuck her, too. Get the fuck off me. Oh, I just got dizzy. My wife's got nerve damage.

Fuck her, too, said fucking Pauly Walnuts, who never backed down from anybody. And Sherrippa, I wouldn't want to get him mad in real life, man. That was a fucking hilarious scene, man. Oh, my. And then P, I wouldn't want to get him mad in real life, man. That was a fucking hilarious scene, man. Then Pauly goes and bullies the guy. The hillbilly in his hotel room. He busts in and like kicks the shit out of him.

Oh, God. And Christopher takes heroin at the fucking... It's fucking great. And he's just sitting there like nodding off and shit. And you can see the colors behind him of the Ferris wheel. It's fucking, you would love it, though. It's so up your alley.

Anyways, is that it? No, one more. One more? Goodness gracious, Heloise. Soros strikes again. Well, what do you mean by that, Nick? A Democratic district attorney candidate in Arizona. How can she even be a candidate?

I don't believe this. You guys, this is all intentional. Don't believe these elections really happened. Don't believe these Soros-funded whatever the fuck. They don't win anything. They get appointed, and it's creepy, in my opinion. Attorney candidate in Arizona has an interesting pitch for voters. Elect me. This is the truth. I'll

prosecute cops, not criminals. You need to shut the fuck up. Julie Gunnigal, who was running in a special, you should be in a special bus drooling all over you, fucking bib. And a special election for Maricopa County attorney this November has pledged to form a special division within her office to prosecute police shootings and use of force. Do you not read the papers, you dumb douche, that people are against this like nine to one across the country? That's how you know it's rigged why would you ever run on that now right i guarantee she fucking wins because she's being appointed the move would put the county attorney at odds with the members of local law enforcement with whom the prosecutor's office must regularly cooperate on cases he's a little whore and a little piece of trash. Yeah, I wouldn't throw

it up, but Gunnigal will take an easier tack with criminals. She has pledged not to prosecute drug-related offenses, reduce incarceration, and push to release offenders before trial. Offenders before trial. How can that be anybody? How can that be anybody? Their campaign vows in 2022 in this country. Look at the violence up in every goddamn major city. How can you, seriously, that's how you know it's rigged.

Unless she fucking loses. I guess you have to once well have one of them lose to make it look. But I don't even believe this. Are you that dumb? You stooge. Garnagel's anti-cop pledge comes as crime rises in Arizona. Yeah, you wouldn't want to do any, process any, prosecute any drug crimes in Arizona where, you know, half of the

illegals are fucking... Comes as crime rises in Arizona and across the country. Yeah, so how, why would anybody in Phoenix, Maricopa County's largest municipality, crime was up more than 40% in 2020. So this is just

what you need and stayed nearly as high the following year amid cries and crime voters have soured on progressive prosecutors like san francisco's chaser boudin he's the only one that got the axe finally whom voters ousted last june so she must know that yet she she's got to, you know. Like Boudin and other progressive prosecutors, Gunnigal has taken money from the left-wing billionaire, George I'm the Devil, evil fucking scumbag Soros. She received...

Now, why doesn't he get pushed out a window? Like, you know? Am I? Soros is, yes. No, because he's the devil. He'll live forever. But why doesn't, like, you know how people criticize Putin, and then like a month later,

somehow the guy fell off the 15th balcony of the Marriott, and she received $6,550 from Way to Lead PAC last quarter, to which Soros' Democracy PAC has contributed hundreds of thousands of dollars. He is the fucking... He's an American. Oh, my God. Gunnigal opposes police unions and told Axios she turned down their campaign funding in

order to win Planned Parenthood support in Arizona. She's checking all the boxes of a Marxist, West Coast stupid. She says if elected, she will not prosecute abortion cases under a 15-week abortion ban. Arizona Governor Doug Ducey signed into law. So she's going to say, fuck the law. I'm going to do what I want. Let's keep an eye on this one. Oh, my God. You're out of order. You're out of order. The whole trial is out of order. They're out of order.

She's out of order. Let's keep an eye on that one. Because, I mean, it's insane to run on that platform even a couple years ago after the riots. But now? So? I just, we're not getting a bottom how it's fixed. Well, it's all money, I understand, but it's not just money. People think because somebody throws a zillion dollars at it, you run a bunch of ads, you're going to win. I mean, the people, the voters do have a say in it.

They can look at the commercial and go, she's fucking nuts. So I'm trying to give the American public the benefit of the doubt. I don't know why. I mean, right? I don't know why. I mean, the masked singer is number one, right? Don't forget to go to Cameo.com if you'd like me to roast a friend or a relative or say happy birthday to your aunt who everybody thinks is kind of, hmm. Cameo.com. You guys, move over to Patreon if you haven't already. You have to, right?

Isn't the other one closed? Yeah, so please, guys, all these new people that we're bringing in, it's not going to mean anything if you guys who have, and a bunch of you have already. I thank you for that. But if there's a bunch that doesn't, if you don't jump over, they negate the new ones and I'm going to cut my wrist on, I'm going to say national

TV or whatever this is. That's it. Before I go tonight, I'd like to thank you all who make contributions to this show. I'm really happy to welcome all our new patrons. Thank you to Greg Michael Ola and Philly Floater, who moved from the Comics Gym to Patreon.

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Trey Parsons. Dominic Saladino. These are all new names, folks. VikerVet. Greg Brownell. Gazzer7? names, folks. VikerVet, Greg Brownell, Gasser7, Paul Budney, Joseph Wayne. Thanks to all of you guys for signing up to support the show. For those of you that want to support the show with a one-time automated monthly contribution without signing up at Patreon. You can do that at nickdip.com forward slash podcast and click on the contribution link.

You can use a credit card, debit card, PayPal, Cash App, or Venmo. Thank you to people who made contributions, Paul Pelosi, Grant Downing, Nick Powell, our buddy Sean Powell, James Rickleman. Thank all of you guys. We had a bunch of new ones in there, and it's exciting because it's getting more crazy out there, and this show is becoming more valuable, and it pumps me up. You guys, thank God I'll say it. You're very welcome. See you back here tomorrow at the same time. Bye. guitar solo Outro Music