The Nick DiPaolo Show - The Corrupt New York Times | Nick Di Paolo Show #679

Episode Date: March 21, 2022

NY behind the Times. Overthrowing Vlad. Zelensky wants to talk with Putin. Burger King employee shoots at customer. Mass shooting in AR.

I am so sick and tired of the liberal agenda that is destroying our country from our schools to our workplaces to our media. It's literally everywhere. Well, everywhere maybe, but not this show. Never. Here you get the truth, unfiltered and unapologetic. I don't care if I hurt feelings or if I take a position that isn't agreeable or if I step on somebody's toes. I call them the way I see them and I put it out there for free. To keep this show free, I need your help. Please go to nickdip.com and make a contribution or even better, subscribe at thecomicsgym.com or on Patreon today and get

an extra encore show each day. Discounts on merchandise and a whole lot more. Thank you guys so much for watching, sharing, and contributing to the best show, in my opinion, on the Internet and the most honest. You guys make it happen. All the stuff that's going on in the world today, and this is what the Democrats are doing. All right. Three, two, one. Got to be a macho Oh yeah!

Welcome, folks. A filthy Monday. How are ya? Busy week. I'm doing Crowder on Thursday morning in Texas, so I have to get there Wednesday night. So there'll be three shows, and then listen to me Thursday morning, an hour difference, remember. Crowder. I'll be on Crowder's show. I'm guessing it's fucking live. It better be. I'm plugging the gigs this weekend at Hyena's in Dallas and Fort Worth. And let's hope

it doesn't happen like last time when they went, oh, we're airing a segment a couple weeks from now. And he's going out. He's touring for the first time in a few years. So I suggest you go see him. He got a cell out. He's touring for the first time in a few years. So I suggest you go see him. He got a cell ticket. He's got a fucking lot of followers.

I think he's got the best internet show out there as far as, you know what I mean, challenging the other side. He should have been a lawyer, Stephen. He should have been a lawyer, Stephen. He goes to friggin' colleges and says, change my mind, you know, and he fucking argues with everybody and takes them apart nicely and peacefully. So anyways, you guys, so I'll be, yeah, so I'll be plugging the gigs for this weekend at Hyena's Dallas on Friday night, I think, and then Saturday's Fort Worth. What else did I want to get out of the way? Oh, I'm doing Mohegan's Fort Worth. What else did I want to get out of the way? Oh,

I'm doing Mohegan Sun in a few weeks, couple weeks. That is April 7th through the 9th. And if anybody out there, a fan of mine that lives in the Boston area, and I'm dead serious, wants to pick me up at Logan Airport. I don't have the flight yet, but on April, I think, 7th, I think I'm flying in the same day, I think. Or whatever. I'll let you know. Anybody who wants to pick me up, I'll give you $175 to give me a ride to Mohegan. I'm not renting a fucking car.

I want to yell at Tommy, but I can't do it, man. I just can't. I can't fucking do it. Land on a plane. and I already have rented, get on a little bus to the fucking, I don't need that. When I'm coming back the following morning to fly back home, I have to get up a little earlier.

I got to hang over, and I don't want to deal with that shit. You know what I'm saying? I let a homeless guy give me a piggyback all the way to fucking Mohegan. So yeah, if anybody wants to do that, preferably a brunt. That's a joke, honey. You know I love you.

Preferably a guy with a hunt brunt. April 7th, I think, is when I land. So put that, think about that. I'll figure out a way home myself. You don't have to. Yesterday, real quick, was Dallas' girlfriend, the lovely Gianna, turned 30. So we got to get a picture of her for the people. And so we had Dallas and Gianna over for her birthday at my house.

I made my famous chicken enchiladas and some type of black bean corn and salsa thing I threw together. Off the top of my head, I got the recipe from a Hispanic fella that sold me weed in the 60s. Anyways, how was it, Dallas? Oh, man. That shit was so good that I couldn't stop eating. No, it really is it is friggin and for for dessert a panna cotta or as we say in by panna cotta which I had never made before and I don't know how this escaped me it's it's

like the only good dessert the Italians have ever put out they're like the Chinese with desserts. They're not a big deal in Italy. But that's just heavy cream and a cup and a half of sour cream and gelatin. And, oh, my God, how fucking good was that? Needless to say, I was on the toilet for two and a half hours this morning and lost 31 pounds. Real quick, what else?

I'm not a big hoops, college hoops. Until March Madness and like the St. Peter's Day. There she is, 30 years old. Looks like she's 22. That's a great picture. And she's just nice as hell. And my wife was terrific. She made it look like a birthday party. You know me. I cooked and laid on the couch. Done my part. Eat that shit and get

out of here. So anyways, what else did I want to say real quick? So I'm watching a little bit of March Madness. I put it on with four minutes left because that's the only time to watch basketball. Put it on with four minutes left because that's the only time to watch basketball. But you want to see woke commercials? You want to see, even now, I'm desensitized because I've been yelling at the TV for almost 30 years now. Even with me being that desensitized, I was almost fucking ready to kick the TV in. Here's one real quick. It's just black. You can hear a black, you know, with a text.

And you can hear basketball audio from a game. You don't know what it is. You don't know if it's men's or women's. You just hear the broadcaster going, ba-ba, over to Awaje or whoever. Bang, three-pointed a win. And then it says, ba-ba-ba, Awaje, whatever her name was, hit one of the most miraculous shots

and basketball hit. But you probably didn't see it because women's basketball only gets 10% of the coverage of ba-ba-ba. Do you understand that propaganda never stops? You fucks. So glad I don't watch it. And can I explain one more time?

You guys, who are my fans, know they shouldn't even get 10% of what the guys. Why do you say that, Nick? What do you say? No, it's very simple. What athletes get paid is based on frigging, you know what, advertising rates, which is based on how many people tune in. And nobody tunes in. For the WNBA or even girls' tournament basketball.

I think that's what they were talking about, college. Maybe not. I don't know if she's a WNBA. Either way. And then the following commercial is Larry Bird, friggin' Charles Barkley, fuckin' what's his name? The movie little.

Spike Lee. And Samuel L. Jackson. Samuel L. Jackson. Ba, ba, ba. Wait, wasn't there more players in it? No, Magic. Anyways, it's Magic, Larry Bird, Barkley. You know, three Hall of Fame, whatever the fuck.

And they're talking about Bird. And this girl walks up. She goes, I wasn't the fuck. And they're talking about Bird. And this girl walks up. She goes, I wasn't even born. Oh, that's Sue Bird. Sue Bird is the greatest, supposedly, WNBA player. She's won, I don't know, four or five gold medals or whatever. Whether you're girls basketball. She won a WNBA champ, whatever.

Anyway, I'm just saying. They're putting her in the same class. And they say, you read it too, Dallas, the best to ever play the game, right? Isn't that how they worded it? Can I just explain something, you lefty fucks? Just because you want it to be so doesn't make it so? You have to qualify that by going, the best women's point guard ever, or whatever.

The best to play. And have the balls to put her in a commercial with Bird. I don't care. You're probably thinking, oh, just let, fuck that. That's just like me coming on going, I'm a woman today. Would you have a problem with that commercial? Of course you would. I'm not a woman until Friday when I have to get on a plane.

Then I start crying. All right, that Friday when I have to get on a plane, then I start crying. All right, that's all I wanted to say. Is it not? Yeah. Anyways, fucking where are we? All right, let's get to it. Enough of my pissing and moaning. First story of the day.

New York behind the times, I call the paper. Not the New York Times. The behind the times. Get it? Well, why? Well, Wednesday, I'll get to the war in a minute. You know how I am. Most of it's propaganda.

So I thought this was the big story over the week. Wednesday report by the New York Times confirmed the authenticity of Hunter Biden's infamous laptop, which was left in a Delaware repair shop in 2019 by the first son before being turned over to the FBI by the repair shop owner. And finally, the Times admits, you know what? It's real. Something the New York Post reported almost two years ago. And the whole fucking world, though.

And you know the fucking, yes. Now, I look at fucking Hunter and I actually like him. I would never put out a picture. I'm just a vain fuck. That could be Joe's waistline. Look at that. He's looking in his eyes. He's saying I'm a mess, but fuck you. I'm having fun. Anyways, the new New York Times report, which was flagged by the New York Post and focused on the investigation into Hunter Biden's taxes and his international business dealings, noted prosecutors

had examined emails between Biden and some business associates that appear to have come from a laptop abandoned by Mr. Biden in a Delaware repair shop and were authenticated by people familiar with them and with the investigation. You mean the people at the New York Post and anybody else? Oh, my aching stem. So according to them, they have to. They have to, you know. It's not real till the time says it's real. Does anybody believe?

See, and they timed it out perfect because they're about two years away from the elect. The reason they buried this story, it could have cost Joe the fucking election. And we know that from a poll they did with people, Democrats, who said they didn't even know about it. And 10% or 12% said if they knew that, they wouldn't have voted for him. And we all know how small the margin was in the theft anyway.

Wouldn't matter. They stole it anyway. Fuck you if you don't believe it. Take it easy. Take it easy. Previously, the Times dismissed the Biden laptop story as Russian disinformation. Remember that? At the height of the 2020 laptop story as Russian disinformation. Remember that?

At the height of the 2020 campaign and claimed in September 2021 in a piece that the Post reporting on the laptop was unsubstantiated. It later scrubbed the word from the article after intense backlash over its inaccurate characterization of the Post's reporting. You can't handle the truth. They really can't. According to the Post, Hunter Biden's laptop contained emails, text messages, photos, and fuck all that.

How about Tony Bobulinski, his business partner who came out and said, I went to a meeting and Joe was there. Remember that guy? Where's he now? And Joe was there. Remember that guy? Where's he now? Photos and financial documents between himself, his family, and business associates that showed how he used his political influence in his foreign business dealings, specifically in

his work as a board member of Burisma Holdings, the Ukrainian energy company. Biden's son, Hunter Biden. Oh, I don't know how the chink's getting involved. The Post's Twitter account was suspended after it tweeted its story on Biden's laptop in October 2020. Can you imagine? They deleted their account,

which began a week-long standoff that culminated in the social media platform backing down and lifting the suspension. Oh, just in time. Do you guys need any more explanation of how you're being used? The

great Bill Hicks. I remember him doing a bit. This has to be going on 30 years ago. And part of the joke was controlled by a media that partitions information. It goes out perfectly, exactly what's going on today. I didn't realize how accurate. The Post editorial board slammed the New York Times Thursday.

Forgive the profanity, but you have to be shitting us, the Post responded before taking the Times to task over its flip-flop. In the heart of the presidential race of 2020, the Times never missed a chance to cast doubt on the laptop, saying the information was purported in quoting a letter from former Democratic officials who claimed with no evidence that it was Russian disinformation. As recently as September 2021, the Times called the laptop unsubstantiated in a news story. And you blew it! You blew it. Readers of the Times have discovered in March 2022, that's this month, that Hunter Biden pursued business deals in Europe and Asia

and may have leveraged his dad's position as vice president to do it. Biden's son, Hunter Biden. Hunter also may not have properly registered with the government or declared all his income. All legitimate topics and discussion about a presidential candidate's family. No. Can you imagine if it was Donald Trump fucking Jr.? You think they would have run with it? They stole the election.

Even if you don't believe that they did it by rigging the boat and making people mail in ballots because of COVID. If you don't believe that, then you got to believe this. It doesn't matter. So they're just full of shit.

The Post added, readers of the Post have known this since October of 2020. Here's how the left-wing media, first of all, I love how they actually say there's a conservative media out there. The people on the left say that. Yeah, Fox knows, which isn't conservative by a long shot. Maybe, you know, maybe America won or whatever the fuck. I'd go wherever the hottest broads are. Look at this handsome guy. Wolf Blitzer creeps me out.

The devil doesn't age, right? He looked like that. I'm telling you, pull up a clip from 1982. It's creeping me. He's the Dick Clark of. Anyways, here's how CNN, MSNBC and those people treated the story about Hunter's laptop when it broke. Fear in the U.S. presidential election. This looks like your classic disinformation campaign. Giuliani has admitted before to working with a known Russian agent to dig up dirt on the Bidens. There are fears that what Giuliani is now pushing here

in the United States could actually be part of Russia's latest and very massive disinformation campaign in the US presidential election. It may very well be a Russian hack and dump operation. It is so obviously a Russian operation. That is Russian misinformation. Get it? Look at her, Reggie White, when he was 22. You fucking black, fat, ugly, racist pig.

I don't mean that in a racist way, but she's a whitey hater, so I don't give a fuck anymore, folks. Just come out and see me this weekend so I can put a new bathroom in. That's where I am now. Been pissing into a bedpan for the last two years because the upstairs bathroom a foot from our bedroom has been closed off. Let's move on to some war. Killing Vlad.

A group of Russian elites. This is a fucking interesting one. A group of Russian elites, this is a fucking interesting one. A group of Russian elites are allegedly conspiring to overthrow Russian President Vladimir Putin and restore economic ties with the West, according to the Ukrainian intelligence. Poisoning, sudden illness, accident. Russia's

elite is considering removing Putin, declared a Sunday Facebook post. So, right there, can I just say, if it's already on social media and out in the public, do you understand? This is, I'm saying it, this is disinformation from Ukraine or whoever.

And if it's not, look at, Putin just got word somebody's trying to kill him. Those guys would already be dead. I got to believe. So I don't believe this, but I mean, it could be true. But anyways, if it's on Facebook, it's like stocks. When somebody gives you a tip and you already read about it, it's no good. Once the public knows, you're fucking late to the game. Anyways, on a Sunday, Facebook post from the chief directorate of intelligence for the Ministry of Defense of Ukraine, that's where they got the information. What exactly leads you to believe the Soviets were involved?

The ministry claimed that a group of influential people, that's in quotes, has been forming in Russia who want to remove Putin from power as soon as possible and restore economic ties with the West, which were destroyed by the war in Ukraine. The intelligence alleges that the group has already been eyeing Alexander Botnikov. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. The Russian director of the Federal Security Service and a member of Putin's inner circle, not anymore, as a successor to the... Imagine this guy's watching, morning, having his morning coffee.

It's like in Scarface, when they went out to that, where was that guy's, remember out in the middle of the Andes, wherever that, Sosa? And they, he had a meeting with all the heads of the drug dealers, and they had their big screen, and the guy's face came up, and he was like, one of the cartel leaders. face came up and he was like one of the cartel leaders. The directorate claimed Bordnikov and Putin had a falling out after Putin put too much mustard on his egg salad. What? Blamed him for

fatal miscalculations in the slow going and costly invasion of Ukraine. They're blaming... He's like a head coach for the Jets. He's about to get canned. Comrade. Yeah? Here is something that might be

of interest to you. A transcript of the conversation between your helicopter pilot and his commander. We intercepted Dragonfly Wolf 10. Colorful names.

Bortnikoff and his department were responsible for analyzing the mood of the population of Ukraine and the capacity of the Ukrainian army, the director said. The director said its intelligence came from Russian sources who are considering various options for removing Putin from power, who are considering various options for removing Putin from power, including a potential assassination. Folks, guys, I hope you have your shit together. If this is true, I mean, because I'm pretty sure he has good information.

Don't you move, you motherfucker. I'll blow your brains out. The leadership change may also be an attempt to establish cooperation with the Ukrainian authorities as the war drags on, the Post said. The Russian economy has been strangled by sanctions imposed by the United States and its NATO allies. The sanctions have put increasing pressure on Putin, who believed his Ukraine invasion, now in its third week, would be over in a matter of days. It was like when the Patriots used to play the Jets when Brady was there. This will be easy work. Remember the year they came up and beat us in a playoff game? Here's Putin checking out some gymnast's tits.

Wait a minute, they don't have tits. Ass, I meant. Across the globe, influential Russian oligarchs had their valuable assets seized by Western countries, and many have fled back to the motherland or to friendlier nations. United States, Lindsey Graham, Republican, South Carolina, he was ahead of the game on this one, was rebuked earlier this month after he called for the assassination of Putin from inside. So Lindsey had the balls to say that. My vagina's angry. It is.

It's pissed off. See Dallas because he's kind of faggy. All right. Dallas is like, I don't get it. He's a vagina? Zelensky. Oh, headlines. Zelensky says him and Putin must talk now.

I'll rip through this quick because this was on Sunday he said this. Ukraine claims death of general Ukrainian official says that another Russian commander has died during fighting, which they say would be the fifth Russian general to have been killed since the invasion on February 24th. You guys believe it or not, I don't know.

General Oleg Matayev of Russia's 150th motorized. Motorized, wow. Good to see you guys are catching up. Motorized Rifle Division, as opposed to the ones that, you know, they're in dog sled, were killed by Ukrainian forces near Maripol last week. So I don't know what to believe. He's gone. And we couldn't do nothing about it.

According to a Telegram post shared by Anton Geraschenko, an advisor to Ukraine's interior minister, CNN cannot independently verify the Ukrainian claims. Look at the guy on the right. Look at the medals on this freaking guy. What is it, 1860? He's the cz on the right. Look at the medals on this freaking guy. What is it, 1860? He's the czar of misinformation. Look at the... Russia claims use of hypersonic missiles over the weekend.

The Russian military claimed on Sunday it had launched a series of strikes on military targets in Ukraine. Now, this is Russia bragging about it. It's not you crazy. In Ukraine, employing hypersonic and cruise missiles on Saturday night. You always save your best shit for Saturday night. Saturday night's all right. Get a little action in.

In on Sunday morning. You don't hit them on Sunday morning. Come on. Danger, Will Robinson. Danger. No, Will Robinson. Danger. Hypersonic sounds serious.

What, do they go faster or something? U.S. officials have also confirmed to CNN that Russia launched hypersonic missiles against Ukraine last week. The first known use of such missiles in combat, they say. That's faggot stuff. You want to call it by its name? that's strictly for fags. That was Biden. No air superiority. Britain's military said Russian forces have still not managed to gain control over Ukraine's airspace. An intelligence assessment provided by the UK's Ministry of Defense said Russia has failed to gain air superiority and is largely depending on

Spirit Airlines for a strategy, standoff weapons launched from the relative safety of Russian airspace to strike targets within Ukraine. Australia announces aid. Prime Minister Scott Morrison announced additional military and humanitarian aid for Ukraine while also imposing an immediate ban on exports of aluminum ore to Russia. The package brings Australia's total military assistance so far to $91 million. Don't get excited. It's only $66.3 U.S. mil. Forced to go to Russia, citizens of the battered city of Maripu

are being taken to Russian territory against their will by Russian forces. I'm staying right here. Oh, no, you ain't. According to the Mariupol City Council, captured residents were taken to camps where... Oh, smells very Nazi-like, which is ironic because that's what they're accusing Ukraine of being. Russian forces checked their phones and documents, the council said. They were then redirected to remote Russian cities. Maripol is under almost constant bombardment, according to a major Ukraine's army,

and residents are rationing food and water. Bodies are left in the streets. Ukrainian President Vladimir Zelensky said what Russian forces have done to Maripol is an act of terror that will be remembered for centuries. And forfeited your own work, your own flesh, your own flesh. act of terror that will be remembered for centuries. Hey guys, it's that time again. It's that time, the time I have to wear a muzzle and listen to half a flight of airline safety propaganda. Oh my God, Tommy knows exactly what I'm going through.

Oh, that's you? Amen, brother. Anyway, you can find all these tour dates and ticket links on my website at nickdip.com. This weekend, on March 25th, I think that's Friday, Hyena's Comedy Club in Dallas, two shows. Next night, Hyena's Comedy Club in Fort Worth, two shows. And then April 7th, 8th, and 9th, if somebody can give me a ride, Comics at Mohegan Sun in Connecticut. May 6th, my old haunt, my favorite owner, James, Governor's Comedy Club, Levittown. May 7th, the Paramount Theater in Peekskill, New York. September 9th, Soul Joel's Comedy Club in Royalsford, Pennsylvania.

September 10th, Algonquin Theater, Manisquan, New Jersey. And September 11th, Sugarloaf Performing Arts Center in Chester, New York. Again, you can get all the links for tickets at nickdip.com and click on TUA.

DC left his pussy video. Yeah, I saw this clip over the weekend of some guy going off in DC. He's still wearing a mask, so you know how he voted. Pissed at the truckers, the convoy. And I can tell by his accent, he's a Northeastern jerk-off. And he is everything that's wrong with people who vote the way he does. Just listen to him.

I only show the last 20 seconds. This guy was twice this angry for about a minute. I'm just showing you the last few minutes. Giving the truckers screaming like a baby. And do you know why they get that upset, folks? And watch how calm. The truckers stayed calm. They kept going, have a great day.

God bless you, sir. And he would get madder and madder. Do you know why they get that angry? They know when they're confronted face to face and somebody's calling them on their bullshit, they know they have no argument. Either that or they literally believe that you're inferior. That's where they start. But listen to this cunt. He's still wearing a mask. What more do you need to know? But here you go.

Watch it. This is him in a trucker yelling at each other. I like America and I like freedom. How do you know? You're a fucking baby. You guys are fucking babies. You think we're asking you to fucking storm the beaches of Normandy? You're a fucking man.

Say the fucking shot. No, I'mandy. You're a fucking man. You're a fucking child. No, I'm not. You're a fucking idiot. No. Yes, I do understand what America's about. You don't fucking get to tell people what America's about. You think you're the people? No.

No, you're a bunch of fucking fascist, racist, air-cow. That's not freedom. Freedom without responsibility as a fucking child is bullshit. Pause. He's almost crying When I fucking smash his fucking face, he's almost fucking crying And he's calling the other guy a child and children and he brought up what racist fascist Again, that is a product

He was made in a lab in CNN, MSNBC. And you know what? I swear on my mother's eyes. I wish I was born at a different time and I was a dick. I would fucking exterminate these people. By the way, anybody wearing a mask now, you're fucking psychologically, they melted you down. You're gone. I like it.

Now people get mad. I like it. The mask, you know what it says? It's pointing out to us people who are normal, haven't lost our minds, who the problem is in the country. That's how you should look at it. It's very hard not to hit somebody, though. I'm fucking getting a haircut yesterday.

The kid next to me is like 25, and he's got a mask on in the place. I was staring at him like I was going to choke the life out. I was trying to go, how did he get to this point? It is fucking, anybody else, do your blood pressure go up? Yeah. It's infuriating. You're...

No, you're... You're a racist. You're a racist. You are a cunt. Cunt, cunt, cunt. I thought you were cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt.

You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. You are a cunt. The Grambling Marching Band. Best band in the country. They do splits and shit. All right, let's move on, shall we?

No, no, no, no! Oh, goodness. From our FLA segment tonight. Gotta be fucking good, don't it? Oh, black people, I try to defend you, but I can't anymore. And again, I'm not generalizing. I chose to live in a city that's majority black. And you know what?

It's just beautiful. We get along great. But I'm just saying, there's too many bad ones in your fucking neck of the woods. A Burger King employee in Florida I really have to go and allegedly shot a customer after the customer supposedly threw mayonnaise at her face. Police

said, I'm surprised she didn't go with it. He called me the N-word. Anyways, mayonnaise in her face. Boy, that would be funny. She was in white face. She would be funny she was in white face she's guilty so somebody throws mayonnaise in her black face and her black solution is what 99 of them yeah you should die uh let's see what her name is I'm not sure she's black though. Shatisha. Shatisha. I got to look up the origins of these names. Shatisha Hicks. There she be.

She looks angry. Why would you hire? Because of it? No. She's arrested Thursday, discharged of this. I'm guilty. Not of a gun. Did you hear that? That was my stomach. Did you fucking hear that? Folks, did you hear that? That's a burrito, tap dancing, trying to get out. I went through a, not a,

it's something, Miami Subs, I think it was called, with my late great buddy, Greg, of course, because I was in Florida. He lived in Miami. We were drunk. It was after one of my shows. I order a turkey sub, never forget it. I get it. We always joke, every time he's with me, they give me the wrong shit.

I open it, right? Just to look at it, there was no turkey in it. It was just lettuce, tomato, mayo. And I'm drunk, and I go, drive around again. He's like, no, no, no. I said, drive around again. We waited. There were like two cars they had to go through.

We got behind them, and I threw it at the window. So I am an asshole tool, but I was a comedian and I was drunk. And I didn't shoot, but I was a comedian and I was drunk. And I didn't shoot anybody. I was just furious because I knew it was coming. He fucking laughed until he shit his pants.

He has been with me at TGI Fridays, Applebee's, where they fucking bring me the wrong shit. And I say to him, I said, I'm not famous,

but I'm famous enough that somebody notices me behind the bar and says, I hate this guy. But they hit the window with a saw. I still remember mayonnaise on the... Police said Hicks opened fire.

You see the difference how white people handle? I throw vegetables. She shoots them. Police said Hicks opened fire on a man after an argument at the drive-thru window. A relative of Hicks told... Oh, let's go to a relative of Hicks. I wonder how they think. A relative of Hicks told, oh, let's go to a relative of Hicks.

I wonder how they think. NBC 6 that the customer she shot had squirted or thrown mayonnaise in her face. Now, if I'm interviewing that lady, I go, but is it really worth shooting him? She'll give you the answer. The customer drove off, parked in the Burger King lot, according to a witness. Hicks then allegedly went to her car, grabbed the gun, and squeezed off five shots at the person's vehicle as they drove away, not even thinking that she could ruin her life. That's what the arrest reports said. These blacks.

I know. She got into her car and fled the scene, but was arrested after cops spotted her vehicle about a mile from her home. How'd they know? Probably a Biden sticker. A gun was found on the floorboard of Hicks' car. I'm surprised it had a floorboard. And investigators recovered five bullet casings in the Burger King parking lot. Hicks walked out of Miami-Dade County Jail.

That's where my buddy used to work. On Friday evening, after making her $1,000 bond. It's just so ridiculous. $1,000 bond. Somebody help me. It's not a plan to keep us to... It's not clear if the customer who hasn't been tracked down by authorities was injured in the shooting.

Hicks' aunt, here it comes. Here's where you see the root of the problem. Right away, you know, it's not her mother or father commenting. It's her aunt, number one. Claimed her niece was defending herself. You're from fucking Hellman's. Not a fucking Glock. She was protecting herself.

This is the aunt. I don't blame her. Everybody else might, but I don't. Let me translate that for you. That's what folks says about this family I does. I has told you and told you that you can always tell a lady by the way that she eat in front of folks like a bird. And I ain't aiming for you to go to Mr. John Wilkinserson's and eat like a field hand and gobble like a hog. Final story.

Doom and doomers. What in God's creation is that, Nick? One person was killed. At least 24 people were wounded by gunfire. I saw so many black gun thing, two spring break shootings. New York City, there were about six abominable crimes. Another one in the subway attack. I can't even fucking,

a woman, a single bomb in the throat slashed in the Bronx. I'm not fucking kidding you. I can't believe people are still living in New York. I really can't. I mean, there's poor people who can't afford to move out. Even them, I'd get on a fucking bus to nowhere. Anyways, at least 24 people were wounded by gunfire. 24 people.

This isn't a fucking military. Including multiple children in an apparent mass shooting at a car show in Arkansas Saturday night. You know, you're like, oh, look at that. That's the new Corvette. How many cylinders is that? How's this on gas?

Does he... Can I get that with 10 to 20? I'll take it. Dumas Police Chief Keith Finch told reporters Saturday night that one person of interest is in custody. Holy fucking moly. Is that the chief of police? Chief of fucking pie? Mother of God, Keith.

He's a big man. Seriously, I feel bad. That guy's not going to live much longer. And he's doing the right thing. One person of interest in custody as his department investigates the possibility of multiple shooters involved. Police said that multiple children were injured. What are they doing in a car shooting, a car show at night? And every time I think of car shows, I think of Jay Leno's joke.

Yeah, I went to a car show. He's, you know, big into cars. Down in Florida, they had a Tom Selleck look-alike there. I don't know, what do you say to a Tom Selleck look-alike? Hey, you know, you look a lot like Tom Selleck. That's all the joke was. Multiple children were injured in the shooting,

during which at least 24 were hurt, but was told that they are expected to survive, so that's good news. Several victims were transported to local hospitals in McGahee and Dumas, with one child being transported to the Arkansas Children's Hospital. At least two victims have been airlifted from the parking lot to the Dasha County Office of Emergency Management. State troopers were sent to the scene at about 7.25 p.m. Saturday

after a report of gunfire outside of business with a car show was taking place. How do you... What are they, stealing cars at a car show? According to Arkansas State Police spokesman Bill Sadler. Bad boys, what you want, what you want, what you gonna do? The car show is part of a yearly community event. Oh, community event.

It's a community event to raise money for scholarships and school supplies. We are just rotting away. There's just no more civility. According to the Delta Neighborhood Empowerment Youth Organizations, the more politically correct the title or name of the thing, the more chance there is of shit like this happening. Police have not yet released any information on the suspect, nor

details on how the shooting unfolded. Are you saying he knows nothing about these matters? To my knowledge, nothing. I'm going to find out what the hell happened here. Come on down. October Fest today to week. That's it, ladies and gentlemen, Come on down. Oktoberfest

today the week. That's it, ladies and gentlemen, for Monday. Again, go to thecomicsgym.com Sign up monthly. I ask you. I beg you. Thecomicsgym.com Patreon.com

Nickdip.com DaveChapelle.org DaveAttell.com, NickDip.com, DaveChapelle.org, DaveAttell.com, Camio.com, if you'd like me to roast a friend or relative, go to Camio.com, NickDip.com, click on the tour dates. I'm forgetting one. No? I can't take it. Again, listen to me on Crowder

Thursday morning if you can. And I hope I can see you guys out at Hyena's. Back to clubs again? But that's... That's... They... They market. Yeah, I make more money.

I don't know. Why did I even bring that up? I'm killing the show. That's it. You think it, I'll say it. You're very welcome. We'll see you back here tomorrow. Have a good day, everybody. guitar solo Outro Music