The Nick DiPaolo Show - The Nazi's Among U.S. | Nick Di Paolo Show #1474

Episode Date: October 30, 2023

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about WWIII and more! Support our sponsor: NAKED WINES! Head to https://nakedwines.com/nickdip  & use code AND password NICKDIP to get $100 off. Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

🎵 Good morning, class. Good morning, class. Good morning, class. Class. Shut up! Thank you. Hi, kids. Welcome back to school. Man, we've been gone a long time.

Not much shit happened happened though, right? Kind of quiet around the world. Dallas got married with a tremendous, we'll get to that later in the show. I didn't want to put it in the front of the show because people are tuning in. You know, the subscribers know you. But the new people be going, well, I don't give a fuck about this. Even though he looks like a German U-boat commander marrying a movie star. Sprechen Sie Deutsch.

Good to be with you. The world is on fire, as Dallas said. Mother of God. But before we get to that, Halloween's around the corner. This has nothing to do with that. Hillary fell. Fell in the corner. This has nothing to do with that. Hillary fell. Fell in the garage, fixing a transmission.

Ah, fat twat. I don't know what to say. I didn't even think of any opening remarks after not being here for two weeks. The World Series is happening. Yes, and by the way, if I had to put money down, the Diamondbacks are going to win this fucking thing. They didn't, even after they lost the first game, which they should have won, they didn't flinch. And they shouldn't flinch. They hit, they move people, timely hitting, they move people over and then they knock them in. play they had the best defensive baseball this year all of baseball in texas did ranges were like they were both nine point whatever the fuck it is percent feeling percentage 990 um but there's

something about the diamondbacks they've seemed destined with the timely hitting and shit and the pitching uh you guys who don't like what I'm talking about now, you're gay. Playoff baseball is tremendous. And I'm telling you right now, man, I'm telling you that the Diamondbacks are going to win the World Series and it's going to be an upside. I like both teams. I got to be honest. But I didn't know the Diamondbacks. Once I saw that they were in it, I go, I think I always pull for the underdog.

Anyways, to get through the Phillies, to win two games on the road in Philly, to go to the World, and so did the other Rangers had to win two in Houston. It's been a tremendous playoffs. Anyhow, again, sorry to bore you male figure skaters and choreographers. You know, I don't mean to. Ah, the homosexuals. No, stop. Anyways, a lot happened.

That and obviously World War III and the main mass shooter, which was just disgusting. And again, I don't want to get... Yeah, we'll talk about it. We'll talk about it when I'm supposed to. I don't want to get conspiratorial. But, you know, I believe in

MKUltra and all that shit, and Dallas knows what I'm talking about. He's been there. He's done that. He went to Guatemala, by the way, on his honeymoon. You know, a place in the middle of political and social upheaval, because that's what relaxes Dallas. Jumping out of good planes. Wouldn't have it any other way. I know.

I'm like, let's go to Bermuda. That's far. All right, let's get to it. Oh, it's a teleprompter. By the way, we got a new one on the way, folks. Might as well get to it. World War III. Remember, Trump was going to get us into World War III,

according to the media and the Democrats. Have they ever been right about anything? This guy is worse than they said trump was going to be and they were exaggerating about how bad he was going to be and how bad he was this guy is times fucking 10 and we're on the brink man there's a u.s troops being shot at in the north, all over, actually. So, you know, we sent the carrier out there

just to, you know, put the fear of death. Going out there in a row, you know, we're going to fucking send soldiers out there to type. We are nowhere near wartime ready.

Of course not. It was spread so thin. I mean, what in God's creation? Anyways, you guys know it set this off on October 6th. Yeah. It doesn't matter. It was a slaughter, a massacre, literally. And don't, I'm getting nuts talking about it.

It's hard to do a funny show when babies are being burned alive and decapitated ripped out of wombs and cut the baby's head off gouged a guy's eyes out cut his wife's breasts off raping girls breaking their legs

raping old women until they die literally breaking their pelvises but this is all made up right you fuckers on the left this is all made up, right? You fuckers on the left. This is when I wish my show went out to... Israeli military intensifies strikes on Gaza, including underground targets.

See, Hamas lives underground in tunnels like rats do. It's really amazing. I say you do what you're doing, like in Caddyshack, the flamethrower, chase that gopher out of the fucking... Unbelievable. Internet and phone connectivity disrupted by Israelis' heavy bombardment of Gaza. By the way, this is their response. And I love what Netanyahu said. He said, never again.

Never again is now. That was the best quote so far. And eradicate them. And people are going, yeah, but the Palestinian, the people, the people elect Hamas. Last time I checked. Yeah, but kids don't, I fucking, no, but they're already being taught to hate Jews in school. So take out nine generations of them. I know that's easy to say because I'm not over there, but I don't give a fuck. If I was Israel, wipe them out. Wipe your ass with them. Leave none left.

Yeah, but the kids, shut the fuck up. They're hiding under hospitals, Hamas. Literally have a base under a hospital over there. And I see Hamas, I see so-called Palestinians applauding when they were putting up all the horrible shit that was being done to Jews. So fuck them. Again, I said this on Tough Ground in 2001. Let Israel take off the gloves and see who the better man is. And that's what they're doing now.

Even though jerk-off Biden is going over there, in public he's there standing shoulder to shoulder. But in private, he's telling him to back off because he doesn't want his deal ruined with Iran. Again, oil money in the end. I think that's always involved. But the response over here at home, I'll get that out in a second. So anyways, Israelis, heavy bombardment of Gaza.

They restored some of the electricity and stuff, many people on Sunday, even as Israel. So get this, folks. Hamas and the Palestinians get millions and millions of dollars every year, literally, aid from fucking oil-rich countries. And instead of building an infrastructure, they put it towards eradicating Israel. They build tunnels with it, bombs, weapons. That's what they do with it. That's why the fucking

Palestinian people live like dirt. That they, you know, so... And rely on Israel for infrastructure. I was going to say, Israel actually provides electricity and water. That's enough evidence for me to go, yeah, they're not the problem,

Israel. Do you think if the shoe was on the other fucking missing foot, Palestinians, you think Palestine or Hamas or whoever's running the joint will provide electricity and water to the Jews? Yeah, they'd drown them and fucking electrocute them. It's not even close. And then you get douchebags over here, college students. We'll get that out in a second. I'll read this shit that I put down here that seemed good last night. They intensify their strikes on the besieged enclave from the land, air, and sea. Filthy, filthy. Durka, Durka. There you are.

Muhammad Jihad. You got that. Hakka Sherpa Sherpa. Bacala. Israeli strikes had knocked out most communications in the territory late Friday night and destroyed a payphone. And largely cut off its 2.3 million people from the world. Who wrote this? Am I supposed to feel bad? Communications were restored. You believe that?

were restored. You believe that? Even in the middle of this, to many in Gaza early Sunday, according to the telecom company Patel. I can't see them blind. We've got a new teleprompter coming this week. Internet access advocacy group, netblock.org, and confirmation on the ground. Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu on Saturday called the three-week-old Israeli Hamas a fight for Israel's existence and said, never again is now. You are correct, sir. Couldn't have said it frigging better. Before I go on in the second half of the show, I'll be talking about Gavin Newsom bullying a Chinese kid on the basketball court.

And Matthew Perry, I know you guys probably might not have been Friends fans. I'm going to be honest with you. I never saw the show for years and years, even in reruns. And then my wife started watching it. For what it is, it's fine. Anything with Jennifer Aniston and fucking Courtney Cox. Courtney Cox? What the fuck? It was fine. Jennifer Aniston and fucking Courtney Cox. Courtney Cox? Is that her name?

What the fuck? It was fine. Sure you have to suspend your disbelief that five people are living in an apartment that would be literally 40 grand a month in New York. But anyways, back to the show. Yeah, so anyways, I'll be talking about that exclusively because he died. Matthew Perry, you know. Exclusively on Mug Club.

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One last time, that's nakedwines.com slash nickdip. Code and password nickdip for $100 off your first six bottles. Naked Wines, perfect for any type of wine drinker. And we thank them for sponsoring the show. The Palestinian death toll passed 7,700, most of them women and children, according to who? Oh, the health ministry in Hamas ruled Gaza. Yeah, so we'll believe those numbers. the health ministry in Hamas ruled Gaza.

Yeah, so we'll believe those numbers. These are the same people that fired a rocket that was a dud and landed on a hospital and tried to tell the world it was Israel's fault. Which they still believe. Well, some of them admitted it was their fault after, you know, a few days. But yeah, Tlaib, we have a fucking woman in Congress. How the fuck are these squad members

even a part of our government anymore? How do you get rid of them? I don't know if you impeach or just fucking... Can you imagine? Tlaib is still out there saying that was the Jews did it. Could you find a more hateful twat than her? I hope she finds a lump on her tit, if she has any tits. Size of a grapefruit.

I always do this to women I hate. Hope it spreads like a fucking California wildfire to her giant unshaved fucking Arab muff. Twat. Die and sleep you. Anyways, according to the health ministry, I get a party melt.

In Hamas, rule Gaza. In the occupied West Bank, the Jews own all the banks. Good night, everybody. Hey, like, Netanyahu said they're going to pay a price. Did I already do that joke last week? I said, yeah, probably. Come on.

More than 110 Palestinians have been killed in violence and Israel raids. More than 1,400 people were slaughtered, not slain. Don't soften the language. than 1,400 people were slaughtered, not slain, don't soften the language, slaughtered in Israel during a surprise incursion by Hamas militants. Oh, militants? You meant terrorists. That's the other thing they do. Every time you see militants, it's terrorists, including at least 310 soldiers, according to Israeli government. At least 229 hostages were taken into Gaza, and four hostages have been released. They're just the most hateful fucking people. Hates Jews?

Yeah. Hates Jews? You know who they just found out today was beheaded? You know the girl on the back of the truck that we were showing the picture of? The German photographer girl? Yeah, they found her head, her scalp. But you college kids out there, and again, you're not watching my show, so found her head, her scalp. But you college kids out there, and again, you're not watching my show,

so I hope you fucking all die. You keep it up. You just keep defending the new Nazis. You fucks. Look what college, and again, generation after generation, the whole world wants a piece of the Jews. I don't get it. I really don't. I don't

fucking get it. Israeli airstrikes have hit areas around Gaza's largest hospital where did I get this from the Gaza times from Palestinian tribune residents say destroying roads leading to the facility which is a major shelter for Palestinian fleeing Israeli bombardment yeah because there's a military base under the hospital. The Israeli military has renewed longstanding allegations in recent days that top Hamas leaders and operatives have built underground bunkers below Shifa Hospital

that's where I got my jab and accused the militant group of using civilians as human shields. Israel has not presented evidence and Hamas denies the claims. Even after even after

they disbunked that Israel blew up that hospital, they still give Hamas the benefit of the doubt. The media. You motherfuckers. Here's what I don't understand. People always say the Jews run the media. Apparently not. Reacting, excuse me, reaching the hospital has become increasingly difficult.

Mohammed Al-Sawah, who was sheltering in the hospital, said over the phone on, it seems they want to cut off the area, he said. Oh, poor you. Another Gaza resident, Abdullah Syed, guilty, described the Israeli air and land attacks in the past two days as the most violent and intense since the war started. Yeah, again, at least it comes under the heading of military and not massacre. The USS Dwight Eisenhower, oh Jesus Christ, aircraft carrier and its strike group has moved through the Strait of Gibraltar, putting two American carriers in the Mediterranean. See, a rare sight in recent years.

You know why? Because under Trump, everything was quiet. The Middle East was quiet. Let that soak in, you fucks who voted Democrat. Think about how wrong you are. You've never been right in your fucking life about anything. Get out of politics. Go do something else.

The USS Gerald R. Ford carrier strike group is already in the eastern Mediterranean, part of a buildup of forces as U.S. supports Israel in its war, in its war against Hamas. The Eisenhower sailed into the Mediterranean on Saturday and is slated to move through the Suez Canal to the U.S. Central Command region as American forces expand their presence in the Middle East to deter Iran and its proxy militant groups from trying to widen the war. I don't know who wrote this. I thought I got it from Breitbart. They're already fucking shooting at American soldiers all over the place. And it is Iran.

Iran is the fucking, the head of the snake, to use a worn-out cliche. But you know, Biden doesn't want his business. He's like Michael Corleone. I don't want my business with Hyman Roth disturbed. Evil. Evil. Think about it. And what's so gross is the reaction over here in the United States with obviously young people. I was telling Dallas right after he went on his honeymoon on a Saturday afternoon.

I went to B&B downtown here in Savannah, had a few drinks, walking back to my car like a good American after four drinks, five, six drinks. And I see Palestinian flags in Franklin Square. It's a little park, about 100, maybe 120 people in a circle, Palestinian flags, lady with a blow horn, young girl, and I hear, to know a Palestinian is to love a Palestinian, ba-ba-ba, the state of Israel. So I go over and I stand amongst them.

Like, you know. Then she goes, now let's bow our heads and a moment of silence for all the Palestinian children killed by the state of Israel. That's when I went, boo, fucking boo, 120, every head turning at me with the fucking eyes this big. Boo.

Some kid comes running over, puts his hand here, college age, you know, I go, get the fuck out of my face. This is fucking America. And, and, um, sir, we're just trying to speak for the dead Palestinian children. I go, I'm trying to speak for the dead Jewish children. Who the fuck's speaking for that? And then all of a sudden, I feel my arms being grabbed. It was two cops. They didn't grab me hard. They just, you know, put the hands on my forearms and there were two cops behind them. And that was it. But none of them,

honest to God, Dallas, I swear to God, they were scared of me. Because they were college age. They have no idea what violence even really is. They have no idea other than to share it on TV.

And I'm too fucking old to, I know that. But I swear on my mother's eyes, like you said, they've never been popped in the mouth in their life. I have too many times. Fucking knocked silly. Ain't going to stop me. But no, this shoulder will come out in a second.

This thing's dangling my fucking, but anyways, and I said to the cops, sorry, fellas. I said, I'm a big cop. And fucking, you know, they were like, no problem. And I felt like saying, well, there is a problem. Let me speak my fucking mind. What are you in my face for? You know what I mean? Unbelievable, though.

Just, she's with that blow horn, just fucking laying out lie after lie. There's a brainwashing, and this is no secret. They hate Israel. Well, first of all, the college students hate themselves, thanks to their college education over here. They hate themselves so much, they see colonialism, imperialism, and that's what they see in Israel. That's what they see, because Israel is the only Western-style government,

and it's successful over there. So that's what they see is an oppressor versus the oppressed. And it doesn't hurt, it doesn't hurt that, you know, it's brown against white the way they see it. But oppressor, right, versus the oppressed, that's how they see the world. A whole bunch of generations. But I can't explain this global. In Russia, a couple days ago, thousands of Muslims barred,

bussed into an airport because they heard a plane was landing from Tel Aviv and they wanted to hang Jews. And they had to divert the flight to another airport and they were there too. What the fuck? Honestly. And I know there's conservative fans out there

who aren't a big fan of the Jews, too. I used to get flack on whatever. But I don't get emails, folks, so I don't read them. Fucking yell all you want. I'm on the side of frigging... Can I ask you a question for you people who hate... Does Israeli blow up people all over the globe for their cause?

Blow up buses and shit? I'm not talking about what goes on between them and the Palestinians. Terror attacks, I mean. And I'm sure you'll go, well, yeah, no, the United States. You've lost your ability to perceive reality, as people say. You really have. You're cheering on today's fucking Nazis. They are new Nazis in different clubs. That's all it is.

And would hang, kill, murder you in a heartbeat. That's the fucking point. You guys that defend gay rights and women's rights, all that shit. Defending people who throw gay people off the top of buildings, treat women

like cattle, and you're defending them. Your fucking politics make no sense whatsoever. You have no logic, no linear thinking. You're so blinded. Get the professors first. Get the people who run the college. Seriously, we need a big douching. And because we've had so much

peace over here, people will have big balls to go out and protest because they know the cops are handcuffed over here and whatever. It's disgusting. It is friggin disgusting. Excuse me. Hey, for those of you guys on Mug Club, stick around for the second half.

Everyone else go to nickdip.com and join to get my full show, Steven Crowder's full show, and a whole lot more. All right? All right. All right. guitar solo Outro Music