The Nick DiPaolo Show - The New American Way | Nick Di Paolo Show #569

Episode Date: July 8, 2021

Carlson vs. NSA. Mace prefers guns. Are you dog-stylin me?

Hey guys, this show, The Nick DiPaolo Show, is a place you can come to for an hour each day and know that the truth is going to be spoken. Sometimes it's politics, sometimes it's comedy, oftentimes it's both. Any way that you cut it, though, it's always honest, unfiltered, and free from the bias you'll find pretty much everywhere else, and certainly all day long by mainstream media. Free speech lives here, and it always will. I want to thank you all for supporting the show,

and I want to encourage you to contribute on the comicsgym.com page or visit nickdip.com and click on Contribute. Your contributions are what keeps this show going and what has helped us now put the show on Roku, Apple TV, Android, Amazon, and mobile devices. Again, donate on thecomicsgym.com or at nickdip.com and know that 100% of your contribution comes right directly to this show. I thank you guys again. hey hey hey it's that time again welcome to the big show. Final day of Thursday from the state of wet Georgia. It rained like, well, as my boss used to say when I was a groundskeeper at the Danvers State Mental Institution. My boss had a hillbilly beard.

He looked like one of those easy talk guys when it would rain hard. He goes, it's raining like a double-cunted cow pissing on a flat rock. Eddie Boardman, Vietnam vet, one of my best bosses ever. One of the cuckoos, this is a true story, one of the guys at the Nuthouse, one of the patients actually spit at him one day. And I was with him when that happened. Next day, me and him are in a building walking down a long hall. Who's coming our way?

But the nut who spit at him the day before. And I'm walking to Eddie's right. The nut's coming this way. We start to get close. Fucking Eddie socks him in the stomach. Can you imagine today? He'd be in prison for 10 years. Punches him in the gut. Again, this isn't a retarded kid. This is a grown man who's cuckoo, who'd rather bite your nose off than look at you. Fucking Eddie punches him in the gut and just keeps walking.

Looks at me and he goes, he goes like this with his beard. One of my favorite moments ever. I look back, this guy's still down on one knee. How he got away with that is beyond me. Anyways, Eddie Boardman, smoke a joint at lunch. Best job I ever had. Best job. Get there at 10 in the morning. Well, besides comedy. Get there at 10, get on a tractor, take my shirt off, have my headphones on,

pretend to cut grass, fuck with the patients laying on the lawns. One guy would ask me for a cigarette, and I kept moving the match back. I could make him go like a fucking 40 yards what a creep and then I've told this story before the nuts would lay out on the grass in front of the main building and they wouldn't get up when I was cutting the grass

so I would cut around them so when they finally get up and look like I made cuckoo cookies it would be like the shape of fucking, I'd come within like three inches of the fuckers. Ah, what a job. Start wrapping up around 3.30, putting your rake away, and fucking got to drive a laundry truck.

And oh, the good old days when I was in shape. I digress. I feel kind of crappy today. My buddy shows up about 11 last night. He goes, I'm fucking starving. What do you got? I break out this tomato sauce I made the night before. I make him pasta. I eat all the pork. This is around midnight. I eat all the pork and I go to bed. I mean, a pound and a half of a pork shoulder with greasy tomatoes. I woke up about six this morning. I thought I was having a fucking abortion

or a miscarriage. Oh, fucking dizzy. Just nauseous. One of those, I hate throwing up. You guys know that about me. I will swallow the puke before I, it scares the shit out of me throwing up. I just fucking hate it.

And I laid there for like an hour and I still feel gross. Drank about, I'd say a half a mug of Pepto. So my stool is going to be blacker than Maxine Waters when I take a dump. That's gross. Speaking of politics, Tucker Carlson, we're going to do another follow-up. This should be the lead story anywhere and everywhere if you're talking politics because it's so creepy and just reveals and exposes the deep state scumbag government that we're under right now. Everybody needs a douche, the DOJ, the FBI.

Excuse me. They've all been there too long. They're unelected officials who fucking make decisions that fuck up our lives. Amazing. Tucker Carlson was talking to U.S.-based Kremlin intermediaries about setting up an interview with Vladimir Putin shortly before the Fox News host accused the NSA, that's the National Security Agency, of spying on him.

Sources familiar with the conversations tell Axios. And we know it's true. You're entitled to shit. What? Why'd you say that? We know it's true. You can't trust the government. Look what Obama did to Trump. Remember Trump?

Trump's like, he tapped the phone. Remember? Oh, you're full of shit. It's all fucking true. Eddie. Yeah? The phone is tapped. I'm not going to use this line anymore. I'll call you there full of shit. It's all fucking true. Eddie. Yeah. The phone is tapped. Oh, no. Listen, I'm not going to use this line anymore. Go to Chen Lewis.

I'll call you there in five minutes. They can't run a tap that fast. That's Brennan. So long, everybody. Those sources said the United States government officials learned about Carlson's efforts to secure the Putin interview. Carlson learned that the government was aware of his outreach and that that's the basis of his extraordinary accusation. Extraordinary.

Fucking Eric Holder went after this guy Rosen, had his computer, the guy that worked for Fox. Anyways, followed by a rare public denial by the NSA that he had been targeted. Really? They didn't come out and go, yeah, what about it? Carlson told his roughly 3 million viewers on June 28th that the day before he had heard from a whistleblower within the United States government. Here's that clip of him telling us just that. We heard from a whistleblower within the U.S. government, someone with direct knowledge, who warned us that the NSA was reading our electronic communications,

our emails and texts, and was planning to leak them selectively in an effort to hurt us. This person had details from my emails that no one outside the recipient could have known, so it was not a delusion it was entirely real in fact it was confirmed after the show last night after we announced this other news organization acted as if it's totally normal for heavily politicized Intel agencies to spy on and threaten journalists they disagree with it's no big deal stop whining but it is a big deal it is completely wrong not to mention illegally and this is far hardly the first time the so-called intelligence community has done something like this. They've done an awful lot of it. Look it up.

If we let them continue to do it, it's the end of democracy. Democracy can't function with semi-independent, highly politicized intel agencies. It's really dangerous. Yeah. Semi-independent. That's putting it lightly. an independent about him hardcore leftist cocksuckers apparently it's a worldwide movement please give me my gun you better watch tucker because he lays it out beautifully he was the best guy around He was the best guy around. He's still around.

Of course, they asked people at the NSA about it. What did you say? I'm going to find out what the hell happened here. Yes, you are. So Carlson said his source, who was in a position to know, repeated back to us information about a story that we are working on that could have only come directly from my texts and emails. It's illegal for the NSA to spy on American citizens.

Things like that should not happen in America. But we don't live in America anymore. We live in a third world shithole. Congratulations. The election was stolen. Nothing is real. All the conspiracy theorists are right. All you jerk-offs on the left are going to wake up one day and realize everything, if you haven't already, everything you believed for the last, excuse me,

30 years politically, you've been wrong about. It's not real. Well, that's going, no, I'm fucking telling you how it is. But unfortunately, they do happen. And in this case, they did happen. Fucking people. You have no idea how to defend a nation. The NSA said in a tweet the next night, as Carlson's showing on the air, that his allegation is untrue. Tucker Carlson has never been an intelligence target of the agency and the NSA has never had any plans to try to take his program off the air, the statement said. A Fox News spokesman gave this response to our reporting. We support any of our hosts pursuing interviews and stories free of government interference. And Carlson gave this

statement, as I've said repeatedly, because it's true, the NSA read my emails and then leaked their contents. That's an outrage as well as illegal. You better get on the horn to him, fella. On Wednesday, Carlson told Maria Badaromo on Fox Business that only his executive producer knew about the communications in question and that he didn't mention it to anybody else, including his wife. But of course, the recipients of Carlson's texts and emails also, this is Axios speculating on what could have happened, knew about their content, and we don't know how widely they shared this information. They're always looking for the other end. The NSA's public statement didn't directly deny that any of Carlson's communications

had been swept up by the agency. Isn't that the most important part? Because they talked their way around that answer. They didn't deny it. Axios submitted a request for comment to the NSA on Wednesday, asking whether the agency would also be willing to categorically deny that the NSA intercepted any of Carlson's communications in the context of monitoring somebody he was talking to

in his efforts to set up an interview with Putin. You see where this is going, the masking, unmasking shit. Remember that? An NSA spokesman declined to comment and refer Axios back to the agency's earlier carefully worded statement.

In other words, the NSA is denying the targeting of Carlson, but is not denying that his communications were incidentally collected. Fucking double talk. Don't give me that smart-alecky shit. They are slippery pricks, are they not? But you guys want more government, don't you?

Experts say there are several plausible scenarios. Who are the experts? They should ban that from articles, by the way. And if you're going to say experts, you have to put up the guy's face or the woman's face in their home address, their email, or their phone number. Same with fucking sources. There you go. You know what poisons our society and our politics? Anonymity. Jesus, I got that out with three cocktails of me. Experts say there are several plausible scenarios, including legal scenarios that could apply yeah yeah yeah the first and least likely scenario is that the united states government submitted

a request to the foreign intelligence surveillance court to monitor carl yeah you know the way they did pfizer the whole fucking surveillance to monitor carlson's uh to protect national security we all know how that goes when they fill out those applications. A more plausible scenario is that one of the people Carlson was talking to as an intermediary to help him get the Putin interview

was under surveillance as a foreign agent. Yes, I'm sure one of his young producers is banging a Russian hooker who, you know, is wearing a wire. Possible. I don't know.

Comrade. Yeah? Here is something that might be of interest to you. A transcript of the conversation between your helicopter pilot and his commander. And his commander. Wolfgang. Colorful names. and his commander, Wolfgang Kalapalnames.

In that scenario, Carlson's emails or text messages could have been incidentally collected as part of monitoring this person, but Carlson's identity would have been masked in any intelligence reports. In order to know that the texts and emails were Carlson's, a U.S. government official would likely have to request his identity be unmasked, something that's only permitted if the unmasking is necessary to understand the intelligence or to impeach Donald Trump. A man goes to a party. He fucks a Russian hooker at the party.

She's wearing a wire. Tucker is angry. In a third scenario, Nick DiPaolo and his producer Matt fly to D.C., put on wires, and infiltrate Tucker Carlson's condo. I don't even know if he lives there anymore. Anyways, in a third scenario, interceptions might not have involved Carlson's condo. I don't even know if he lives there anymore. Anyways, in a third scenario, interceptions might not have involved Carlson's communications. The U.S. government routinely monitors the communications of people in Putin's orbit who may have been discussing the details of Carlson's request for an interview. That one's kind of plausible, I guess, those dirty...

What exactly leads you to believe the Soviets were involved? Well, I just told you why, you motherless tit wonder. My house is under construction. This is what I'm going to be hearing for the next fucking two months at fucking 8th and... That's me. for the next fucking two months and fucking ate the most. That's me on the porch. Anyways, that's the world we live in,

and our own government is spying on us. The world is changing by leaps and bounds every second of the day. This is not the country I grew up in, which was Italy. Here's an article called The New American Way. I have it. I have it. I have it here. We have an affidavit.

I'm going to find out what happened. Listen to this. This was by John Tabby. Somebody says that he got it from somebody else. It doesn't matter. John Tabby. T-A-B-B. I don't even know what the source is. But listen to this. Oh, Snopes. This is all right on the money. This is all true. You can verify this yourself. This is how it works today for some people in this country. The new American way of life. Get on board.

For a guy and his girlfriend with two kids, all you have to do is follow these proven steps. Don't marry her. Always use your mom's address to get your mail. The guy buys a house Number four The guy rents out a house to his girlfriend with his two kids Number five Section 8 will pay $900 a month for a three-bedroom home

Step number six Girlfriend signs up for Obamacare so guy doesn't have to pay for family insurance Step number seven Girlfriend gets to go to college for free being a single mother What a country Step number seven, girlfriend gets to go to college for free, being a single mother. What a country. Step number eight, girlfriend gets $600 a month for food stamps, which we put towards her boyfriend's rims. Step nine, a girlfriend gets a free cell phone.

Step 10, girlfriend gets free utilities. Are you fucking kidding me? I knew it was bad. Step 11, guy moves into home, but continues to use his mom's address for his mail. That's a big step. The black guy doesn't wear his mother's. Step 12, girlfriend claims one kid and guy claims, girlfriend claims one kid and the guy claims the other kid on their tax forms. Now both get to claim head of household at an $1,800 credit. Thirteen, girlfriend gets $1,800 a month disability for being crazy or having a bad back and never has to work again.

This plan is perfectly legal and is being executed now by millions of people of all stripes. A married couple with a stay-at-home mom yields $0 in our country. An unmarried couple with a stay-at-home mom nets $21,600 in disability, plus $10,800 free housing, plus $6,000 free Obamacare, plus $6,000 free food, plus $4,800 free utilities, and a $6,000 Pell Grant money to spend, plus 12 grand a year in college tuition free from Pell Grant, plus 8,800 in tax benefits for being a single mother. That all equals $75,000 a year in benefits. And then the guy asked,

any idea why the country is $18 trillion plus in debt and half the population is sitting around letting the other half pay their way? Just let that sink in. We know who you are. We know where you live. Think about that, whitey. White privilege my ass.

I'm carrying you motherfuckers. Just let that sit in. Huh? 75 large. And you probably think, well, they don't even know how to use this system. Well, there's people that explain it to them. See?

They all know how to use it. You can give me a lap dance from a black stripper. I was in Atlanta once. He's explaining how the benefits work to me. But then she gave me a nice hand job in the champagne room, so I forgive her. Can you fucking imagine? $75,000.

And you, Mr. and Mrs. Jones, who get up, go to work every day, take care of your family, pay your taxes, are flitting the bill. That ought to make your pubes stand up. That's no America, Matt. Do you got kids? Can you imagine?

I feel bad. I look at my little, I don't know what you call them, my nieces' kids. And I'm just going, aye, aye, aye. What are they going to be living under? Oh, goodness. I mean, hopefully it'll turn around. I'm sure Lindsey Graham's got some tricks in his pocket. Okay. Back to some more cucka there are white niggers i've seen a lot of white niggers in my time in our rtr segment tonight that's reverse the races police in long beach california i think

that's snoop's hometown you know i have opened a hate crime investigation after discovering that a local statue of the Reverend Martin Luther King Jr. had been vandalized with racist graffiti. Oh, no. And that's a hate crime? Is it because we're black? I'm supposed to believe that's a... Do you understand? There's nine ways...

Let me do what Snopes did. I'm going to give you nine scenarios here. First of all, it could have been done by some white people who have had enough watching their heroes be torn down and nobody charged with a hate crime. Matter of fact, the government's burning it on. The military agreeing to change names and tear down statues. Okay? So it might have been somebody.

Number two and the most plausible, a black person did it. The way they hang a noose on their own doorknob or they fucking draw a swastika on the side of their car and then they get caught. Which is my most likely guess. It was probably, or a white kid from Antifa.

You know what I mean? I'm saying it's an inside job. Do we have a close-up of the swastika. Yeah, that's a black guy's handwriting. I'm kidding. First of all, that doesn't even look like Martin Luther King. It looks like Magic Johnson asking for the ball. Oh my God. They're investigating it as a hate crime.

Meanwhile, all the shit we watched last summer, didn't hear one word about that. Unfucking real. I have to pinch myself, and I still think it was a hoax thing. The Long Beach Police Department rushed to the MLK Jr. Park at around 3 p.m. Friday after receiving, you know,

if you got rid of, I was just thinking something, you know, if you got rid of MLK Jr., took his name off highways and roads and neighborhoods and statues, crime would go down about 80%. What? You heard me. It's a joke, everybody. Lighten the fuck up at home. Don't make me come over there. Anyways, at 3 p.m. Friday, after receiving reports of hate bias motivated vandalism, police spokesman Brandon Fahey told NPR, oh, it was on NPR. So we know it's true. Ooh, next up, fucking Book Nook, NPR. You ever listen to them on a friday you know listen to them fat lazy lesbian broads who can't get laid they put on npi i have a bit about this on one of my albums and they just sit there shaving their giant muffs listening to some guy in hushed tones going today we have on dr thomas friedman he leads up the aids research council

in bethesda, Maryland, and he's coming up here. Nobody will fuck me. The bits, but that's funny. They found that the front of the king statue had been vandalized with spray paint, which workers from the Parks and Recreation Department were working to scrub clean. You remember the girls that were trying to scrub clean the wall that was at Manhattan? It's a building that had BLM on it, spray paint.

Remember the shit they got for it? They were deemed as racist and shit. You know, let's just go. The fucking gloves are off. The graffiti has since been removed. And the department is investigating the matter. It's a hate crime. Oh, boy.

Your tears are so yummy and sweet. Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness. Yummy. Yummy, you guys. Let me just say, here's the other aspect of this story. MLK Jr. deserves a statue and deserves all the accolades, except he might have been watching his friend rape a chick, a white chick, but that's beside the point.

Christ, our presidents do that today and get out of it. But what I'm saying is BLM and all those far-left radicals, they don't follow his mantra of judge people by the content of their character, not the color of their skin. That's not what CRT is all about. So maybe it was one of those jerk-offs. But you can't call it a fucking hate crime

if a white guy did it because they're teaching hate in school. They cancel each other out. That's how my world works. But far-left radicals don't believe in what Martin Luther King preached. More white people believe in it. That's not fair either. In politics, I'm saying.

Police would not confirm the nature of the graffiti. Oh, I guess it was hateful. What are you fucking talking about? of the graffiti. Oh, I guess it was hateful? What are you fucking talking about? Citing an, uh, it would have been funny if they put, like, a smiley face on him and it was all nice.

Indian headdress and a midget with one. Citing an ongoing investigation about photos on social media show a black swastika spray-painted on the statue's center. That must be white supremacist, right? Let's do that story at NPR.

Let everybody know what a horrible country this is. We're talking to Bill Friedman, the ACLU, and other Nazi-related symbols were painted on the statue's legs. What kind of horse cuck is this? I'm for you. Do eigenen arbeit. Do eigenen fleisch. Eigenen Schlossneid. legs. What kind of horse cuck is this? Hates Jews. Hates Jews. Nah, the guy who drew the thing probably. Police do not have a suspect in custody. Department, they'll make one up though. They thought they saw a white guy 20 miles away with a piece of chalk. The department told NPR but said in a statement, they are committed to bringing the culprit to justice.

Sure, we watched hundreds of statues being pulled down by mobs last summer. Nobody lifted a fucking finger. Nice country. Nice country. Nice game. The Long Beach Police Department takes all reports of hate or bias-motivated incidents seriously if the complaints are coming from people of color. Why don't you add that in there, you cheese dick?

And we value the diversity of our Long Beach community and are actively investigating this incident. To hold the individual responsible and accountable for their actions, police said. Oh, please. Please, Kevin. We're doing no such thing. What's going to happen? They're going to do an investigation.

There'll be a surveillance camera, and they'll see that a black guy did it, and they'll go, just fucking don't say anymore. Let this story go on. Or if it's a white guy, and I'm the white guy's attorney, I go, hey, I'm not going to, I want to see everybody else on footage that we have from last summer. I want them all going to jail for a hate crime. That's taking the law and just applying it unequally now to white people. They think it's payback to libs.

They're fucking living in a dream world. Ucky, uck. Am I almost done? I've got to go home and take a hammer to the stove, I can't wait to, you guys know how I love to fucking cook, one of my few hobbies, and oh my god, I've been cooking on a stove with a fucking, what do you call those coils, first of all, it's electric, I'm a fucking chef, I need gas, gas is way better to cook. But anyways, the coils, they're bent. So every time I put a pan on, I put olive oil, it all goes down to one side. I know these are white people problems, but I'm just saying.

Then it says, you know, cook something at 350 degrees for 20 minutes. And Then it says, you know, cook something at 350 degrees for 20 minutes. And after about a year, I bought an oven thermometer, put it in. It's only off by about 150 degrees. Just horrible. Oh, it's just fucking. Anyways, wait till you see what I got coming. I'll take pictures of it.

Even worse. Must be good shit. I got it off Craigslist. Let's roll on, shall we? On a Thursday God, that looks like fun And are you dog-starting me segment tonight? Excuse me This is par for the course

I need a taller mic God, I look nice in a black shirt. I look like a magician from Long Island. Watch me pull this dog out of my ass. A still incarcerated convicted murderer, are you listening to me, made history in the nation's capital, that would be D.C., when voters recently, get this, elected him to one of the District of Columbia's

Advisory Neighborhood Commissions. This really isn't news. What, another criminal winning an election in D.C.? How the fuck is that even news? This guy's still incarcerated. He won an election for a neighborhood commission, which advises the local government, listen to this, on neighborhood issues such as police protection, parking, zoning, liquor licenses, and trash collection.

And you know what he's in jail for for the last 20-something years? Murder. And he's going to clean up your neighborhoods, keep them safe. It's just so ridiculous. Oh, my aching stem. My aching stem. Wow, well, we live in fucked up times, and they're using race as a cudgel, and it's working. Joel Kasten, 44, has been in prison for 26 years

after a jury convicted him of first-degree murder in the August 14, 1994, ambush slaying of Rafiq Washington, 18. Let me guess, drugs? I don't know. I see Rafiq Washington. I'm like, yeah, something tells me he had it coming. That's so unfair to say, Nick. I know, but I say it anyways. That's the beauty of the show. He is expected to be released from D.C. Central Detention Facility either this or next year. Central Detention Facility either this or next year. Getting elected while behind bars is difficult, but not impossible. For example, Joseph D. Morrissey, seen here with the longest neck in politics, he looks like one of those rock-em-sock-em robots that get hit with an uppercut. You could behead him with a frisbee.

you could behead him with a frisbee joseph d morrissey originally a democrat who would have guessed was re-elected as an independent candidate to the virginia house of well why not virginia has a the governor is a fucking klansman and a blackface dude virginia house uh delegates in january 2015 the month after he was sentenced to six months in jail on a misd... That's how bad it is in D.C. They're like, we know he's a fucking con, but nobody else better out there. Misdemeanor charge for contributing to the delinquency of a minor. They, oh my God, what's that all about, huh? Morrissey is now a member of the virginia senate and is once again a democrat of course he is so let's listen to the uh the gentleman who got elected um while he's still in jail for

murder um let's see what he has to say i'm sure he's changed his life around and he found God in the toilet, in his cell. Let's listen to what Nitwit has to say. Georgetown comes in with... Pause! Did you say with? Georgetown comes in with? With? Sorry, you don't get elected to anything in my country.

Let's fucking glorify ignorance. It's with. It's with. It's with. Did you take an English class while you were fucking doing time for murder so you could be elected? I'm going to make this neighborhood all nice with trees. With.

You talked into the mic. You're talking to the mic. You're part of the show, Matt. Oh, dear. Did you notice they subtitled the entire video because of the way he speaks? I know. I know. That makes me sad for black people sometimes.

Subtitles. And the guy grew up right here. Anyways, whiff. Go ahead. Let him finish. Learning, but more than him finish learning, but more than the higher learning higher sense of humanity

said the murderer, and that comes across so beautifully to me, personally and so I will walk away from this program, or the class that I'm taking with Georgetown is there no way I'm going to hug him or something? come on, don't be racist

that we can not only just share good, wholesome dialogue on an array of topics, but also we can share the fact that we share the same planet, that we come from the same human background. And that sense of humanity is what i've learned from the program personally who gives a fuck what you think we partners we brothers and we friends i want to be happy for a guy that turns his life but see in my world when you take somebody else's life we don't know the whole story behind i I know that, but it's, no. First of all, in my world, you stay in jail the rest of your fucking life.

I don't care if you're 11. If life is so precious and humanity is, you find all that shit after you take a life. So I don't want to hear from you. All right? Stay in there and do what you're doing now. He's helping other inmates, which is good. But only in the United States of America, this racist, this bastion of racism, can a black guy in jail for murder get elected to something.

Public office. Oh, God. After the lights, the party's over. They say that all good things must end. Call it a night. The party's over. And tomorrow and next year starts the same old thing. Dandy Don with about three drinks in him on Monday Night Football. That's when the country was terrific.

Not when murderers get elected to public office. Kasten stated, my platform will be used to restore the dignity of incarcerated people. You notice the fucking name, the word victim's number? That will no longer be judged by our worst mistake. And to establish equality. How about the guy that's six feet under for the last 20-something years? What's he got? What's his future, motherfucker?

And establish equality for both the male and the female populations. I will be your biggest advocate to make sure your voice and your concerns are heard. If they aren't heard, I'll stab the motherfucker who ain't listening.

In a candidate questionnaire he completed, Kasten wrote, I have a proven track record of rehabilitation and striving for excellence, which serves as an indication of the passion I will bring to my tenure as the ANC commissioner. A writer, Kasten has, okay, he's a writer and he says WHIF. Okay, I'm just saying. He's taken for credit courses through Georgetown University's prison scholars program, mentored young men in jail, practiced yoga. Count me in. Where do I pull the lever? And edited a prison newspaper.

So he's fit to go. Fuck it. Run for Senate. Somebody help me. Joe lists my opener and said, I really worry about you dying of a heart attack. And I go, the only reason you're worried is because you've been opening for me. Where's your income coming from? Funny dude.

He's doing great, too. Very proud of Joe List. I'm the one who pulled him out of the pile when he was a young kid. Let me go on about this guy. What is this guy's name? Let's call him Kevin O'Neill. He was elected June 15th to the Advisory Neighborhood Commission, ANC, for Ward 7. That's a great ward.

Becoming the first incarcerated person to be elected to public office in the District of Columbia. Do you need to know any more about the swamp? Please. After I stabbed a motherfucker, then I ran for office. I won that motherfucker. Hey guys, I want to take a few minutes and introduce you to joinhoney.com. What they offer is great. I'm not going to say I was on there again for the ninth time in a row because my house is being torn up. But I have been on it many, many times. I've grabbed travel items mostly.

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If you don't already have a free account at joinhoney.com, you're missing out. For crying out loud, folks, it's free. And just by getting it, you'll also be supporting this show, which supports the truth. Get it for free at joinhoney.com slash nickdip. That's joinhoney.com slash nickdip. And we thank them for sponsoring the show. And we really do. That's one thing that I know how to use. If I can do it. My God.

If they want a burger war, damn it, we're going to give a burger war. Hey, next headline. I wrote it myself. I think it's very clever. Mace prefers guns. What does that mean? I should write for the New York Post.

A South Carolina congresswoman is stocking up on firearms and taking, is there anything sexier than a bribe with a gun? I mean, if she's like a seven or eight. She's stocking up on guns and taking target practice after her home was vandalized by anarchist pieces of left-wing shat. Don't you move, you motherfucker. I'll blow your brains out. Rep Nancy Mays said she decided to carry a weapon after a Memorial Day incident when profanity and anarchist symbols were scrawled in spray paint on her Charleston

property, according to Fox News. It doesn't feel good that I feel like I have to look behind my shoulder every day. It doesn't feel safe, the Republican freshman lawmaker told the network. I carry a gun wherever I go today, wherever I'm allowed to. I do carry. Good for her. She's like Marjorie Taylor Jones. Let's listen to Ms. Mace. Well, they get it. They're in middle school and they still got good senses about them. They're young enough to understand that they didn't feel safe when this happened and

they were worried. And I remember the first day of picking them up after school when this happened and the first thing out of their first question out of their mouth was Matt, is that the Talmadge? The Talmadge? The what? The Talmadge Bridge. I think so.

That connects South Carolina to Georgia? It is, isn't it? All right. We're famous. Go ahead. I'll be jumping off that after the kitchen's done. I get the bill. Go ahead.

Are we safe? And we've had to change our lifestyle quite a bit since it happened to feel safer. She sure has. I'll protect you, honey. A week after the vandalism, Mace posted on Twitter, buying another firearm, this one to carry. We have that picture, right? This one to carry, accompanied by a photo of the 43-year-old at a gun store. Hmm. The congresswoman got a concealed weapon permit in December after her car was keyed and she received death threats, the article said.

What pieces of garbage on the left, huh? How dare they. Mace, the first woman to graduate from the Citadel. How about that? How about that? How about that? For the love of God, you need shooting lessons. She first woman to graduate from the Citadel. Grew up.

That's a military school. I think we played them at me. Grew up with guns in her homes and is now teaching her children how to use them. I think I like this girl. I swear to God, the women in politics today have more balls on the right than the men. Except for, you know, Mitch McConnell. Oh my, oh my.

Because I don't have a channel. When this happened, it really changed everything she said for me. I'm not going to live in fear and I'm not going to be intimidated. I fucking, you're right. God damn it. My vagina's angry. My vagina's angry. It is.

It's pissed off. Get a gun. I did. She said, I think it's one of the most empowering things that you can do is to be able to defend yourself. And one of the most American things is what I say. I am here. I have things to say.

You say I'm beautiful. I want to show this show to some feminists. Watch them melt. I get to demolish it today. I mean, I do it every day, but this one actually helps. So that's her, another Republican woman, and I like it. I like it. I'm all for her.

I love Sarah Palin. Love the broad who flies over, I don't know, in a helicopter with a gun shooting whatever she was shooting at. Indians? I forget what it was. You know who doesn't get that? People who vote Democrat. They just don't get it. That's the headline for the next story.

Do you guys know who Ozzie Guillen is? Remember? White Sox manager, former player. He went off on a tyrant. I should have pulled that up. He used to lose his shit with umpires and with reporters. And I like him. I just like, I'm a fan of the Latino fellas. They're still kind of masculine. The great Ozzy Guillen gets very emotional because he gets what

it means to live in such a great country. We have a clip of him because i guess in 2004 or so uh he became an american citizen and they asked him about it on uh i believe it was sports center here we go january of 2006 that's when you became an american citizen how about this day what did that mean to you that day special people they don't know how hard that is. How many people die, how many people open the thing, how many people want to be American. It's a very honor for me to do that. Hey, you're really emotional right now. Why are you so emotional? I'm cheering up out in that.

Pause. Perfect question by a fucking ESPN guy. What are you crying about? It's just a fucking country. Sexist and racist, don't you know that? I mean, why are you crying? There's no crying in baseball. Go ahead. I don't know. Opportunities, man.

Exactly. Opportunities. He gets it. And being great, I've been living in this country for a long time, give my family a great cause and open the door for them to be who they are.

You didn't know that video was coming. Maybe that caught you for a surprise. Maybe that was. Yeah. It was funny, but I know quite often

I'm a very tough guy, but seeing that, I know how that means to me and my family. Love it. Fucking love it. He was the best guy around. Put him in the

booth. They're talking to him. Maybe he's in a booth. Maybe he does the White Sox. I don't know. Good baseball guy. He used to lose his shit. Like Earl Weaver used to lose his, you know. But he appreciates it. Somebody who gets it.

I wish the guy asked him, how are you going to vote? It don't matter. The thing was stolen, man. Here is one of the funniest clips I'm about to show you. This story made me, uh, I teared up like Ozzy when he became an American.

Some shit just makes me laugh so hard I actually get a little giddy. I call this the Baconator. A man was arrested. This makes me... A man was arrested after he was caught on a doorbell camera rubbing raw bacon on his Muslim neighbor's...

on his Muslim neighbor's home in Las Vegas. I can you imagine being so consumed with hate? It's the middle of the day and you're like, God damn it. I got to I got to get the Publix and get that smoked bacon. What's the one they hate the most? Walk into the deli. Give me a powder. You most fucking anti-Muslim ham.

Take a look at this asshole in action. Look, he's rubbing bacon on the handles of the door. Oh, stop it. What a piece of shit. Oh, that's a waste of bacon. If I saw that on my door cam and I lived next to these people, I'd be out licking the railings all day. All right, that's enough of that jerk-off.

Oh, my God. Bon appetit. Delicious. Thank you. Oh, God. What a jerk-off. You're fucking crazy. Ricky Uich, 58.

He doesn't look crazy. That's a good thing. He uses bacon grease in his hair. Told police he did not like the family because they are Muslim. Well, that's laying it right out there. He's also accused the family of being terrorists. This guy's such a hack. Durka, Durka.

Muhammad Jihad. Haka Sherpa Sherpa. Abakala. We have to use this show as a promo. This story. I don't think he definitely hates... The person from the family. I do think he definitely hates us,

and he's trying very hard to make us feel uncomfortable. Why? Because he's rubbing bacon on you, Dona? But yeah, I do feel it's a hate crime, said another family member. We have her saying that. Durka, Durka, Muhammad Jihad. Haka Sherpa Sherpa, a bacala. I think she's a fake Muslim. That wasn't real. Look at fucking Ricky Uich. I'm 59. You got to tell me I look a little better than that guy. It's hard to tell with that terrific hair that he has from great clips. Let's stay on violence.

Now that's a hate crime. I don't mean doing it against Muslims. I mean wasting bacon. That's hateful. How could you do that? I wonder if you use prosciutto if that would bother the Muslim. pursuit if it would bother the Muslim. Anyways, headline, throw that guy a life preserver. I just picked this story out because it's so typical of, I don't know, this mentality in this country that diversity is so good and blah, blah, blah. But there are certain races who are quick to anger, I won't mention which one, to violence, have no't mention which one, to violence,

have no problem-solving skills, and anything will set them off, and they won't think twice about trying to take you. A 17-year-old lifeguard was stabbed and brutally beaten at a Massachusetts beach. Well, he must have deserved it. What did he do? He told a rowdy group of parkers to stop smoking and boozing it up. So, you know, he should die for that, according to a black guy. The victim was on duty at Bell Pond in Worcester around 6.30 p.m. Sunday

when he told the men that drinking alcohol and smoking were not allowed at the park and that they would have to leave if they didn't stop. Worcester police said several people in the group left the park, but one man, let's guess who, became verbally aggressive with the teen. Picture. Oh, what kind of haircut is that? That's not a Marine. I'll tell you that much.

That was a lifeguard. Let's show him in all his glory This is the guy that stabbed the lifeguard Because somebody Oh look it Boy he's breaking all the stereotypes Sneaker store couldn't be happier Giving the finger to the camera In both pictures

Notice on the right his torso is four times Longer than his legs. He's just angry he's a dwarf. So this cocksucker stabbed the guy because the young kid asked him not to you know. I just had to throw that.

This is America today. But it's again it's white anger. It's the white man that is the problem. Don't forget that, people. The man then returned, this jerk off, with a smaller group, an arm with a knife and a stick, pummeled the lifeguard who was taken to a local hospital, non-life-threatening injuries. Three suspects were later arrested in the incident,

including, that's him, Celestine Bergimana. I don't want to fuck up his name. He's very important. Ugh. There's something wrong with the black man's mind. There's something wrong with his mind. He's 22 years old, charged with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon. Is it not a deadly weapon?

It's just a dangerous one? That was a knife. Yeah. Is that just, oh, it's a black guy doing it. We'll make it dangerous. Yeah. Is that just, oh, it's a black guy doing, we'll make it dangerous. Disturbing the peace, disorderly conduct, trespassing, and resisting arrest after a foot chase. So he'll do about, what, 30 seconds?

I wonder if they have no bail and all that other fucking horseshit. These blacks. Who knows where they're going to take the wrong way. Two others, 19-year-old Muhammad Abdu'ala, again, terrific kid. Durka, Durka, Muhammad Jihad. Haka Sherpa Sherpa, a bacalao. That's all he had to say. And an unnamed 17-year-old was hit with a salt and battery, disturbing the peace charges. Robert Antonelli Jr., the assistant commissioner of the Worcester Parks and Recreation Department, The assistant commissioner of the Worcester Parks and Recreation Department told reporters that the lifeguard who was not identified

had only recently started the job after undergoing training. Gee, I wonder why that spot was open in the first place, huh? We're not happy, Antonelli said. As a city, as a community, what happened here was uncalled for. That's the best phrasing you can come up with. community. What happened here was uncalled for. That's the best phrasing you can come up with. A fucking, one of your employees was almost beat and stabbed to death because he was doing his job and you come up with, it was uncalled for. Think about that. And this is why the fucking white man is going down the tubes. Yeah, that was really, I thought that was a little over the top. You know,

him trying to stab him in the throat and shit that's the best you can come up with this is what happens to people who live in states like Massachusetts he should have come out and said it's an outrage I'm sick of diversity it's a big fucking lie but then we'd never see him again which would be good

for us it was uncalled for he said it was a simple request. It's a simple item, and they took it too far. He's talking like they stole a bike from the park. We're not going to stand for it, he says. You want to make a bet? People like you always stand for it. That was uncalled for, Timmy.

Anybody else just exacerbated? I think that's enough before my heart gives way. I want to thank you people again for a great week. The numbers are slowly climbing upwards. When I got kicked off YouTube, you know, I can put ads up. I can't do any of this show on YouTube

if you're wondering. When they cracked on me, it fucking hurt the numbers, but they are turning around. I need you guys to spread the word of the Lord. That would be me. Yeah, thank you so much. Don't forget nickdip.com, thecomicsgym.com. You can watch for free or sign up monthly. Same with patreon.com.

And cameo.com. Got one waiting for free or sign up monthly. Same with Patreon.com. And Cameo.com. Got one waiting as the show was going. One came in. If you want me to roast one of your friends or relatives, go to Cameo.com. Go to my profile. It'll tell you what to do. And I will make a video on my phone, like a minute, minute and a half. And we can roast the shit out of somebody who probably will be a fan of mine too and love it.

So that is it. You guys love it. So that is it. You guys think it, I will say it. You're very welcome. Have a great weekend. We'll see you back here on Monday. Bye-bye. ប្រូវាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រ guitar solo Outro Music