The Nick DiPaolo Show - Tim Walz Pro Child Mutilation | The Nick Di Paolo Show #1927

Episode Date: July 27, 2026

In today's episode Nick talks about UK Stuck in 1984, Marxist Minnesota Fucking With Kids, Scots Love Boston, Woman Problems, Gymnast Injures Neck, Illegals Kill Another American and A Woke Odyssey! D...on't sleep on @ultrapouches. Nick DiPaolo fans get 15% off with code NICKDIP at http://takeultra.com  #UltraPouches #ad The FULL SHOW is live streaming & FREE-ONLY on Rumble! Join our LIVE CHAT at 6pm ET every Mon-Thu or watch the FULL EPISODE anytime on demand after 7pm ET. Follow my Channel and get notified! https://rumble.com/c/TheNickDiPaoloShow GET TOUR DATES & TICKETS - https://www.nickdip.com/tour NOVEMBER 5TH - The Punchline: ATLANTA, GA NOVEMBER 6TH - Rivers Casino: PHILADELPHIA, PA NOVEMBER 7TH - Soul Joel's: POTTSTOWN, PA MERCH - Grab some mugs, hats, hoodies, shirts, stickers etc… https://shop.nickdip.com/ PERSONAL VIDEO FROM ME – Send someone a personal video from me! Go to https://shoutout.us/nickdipaolo  or www.cameo.com/nickdipaolo SOCIALS/COMEDY- Follow me on Socials or Stream some of my Comedy!  https://nickdipaolo.komi.io/  

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Starting point is 00:00:38 We'll do it live. Fucking thing. I just played that to light you know the mood I'm in. You're looking at somebody who got two. I'd say two, and I'm being generous. I told my wife two hours sleep. I just said that not to scare it because I don't think I got it. And I maybe got an hour.
Starting point is 00:01:09 I was exhausted yesterday because of the day, the night before I couldn't sleep. So I crashed last night, yesterday afternoon. And that's when I get all my qualities. sleep, which is so wrong. Now, you know, and fucking midnight rolls around. I'm ready to play fucking field hockey. What? But you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:01:29 Fucking, oof, too tired to jerk. It was just horrible. You know what I'm saying? And that's usually the best way to knock a man out. I don't care what age. Even at 18 after a blow job, you're going to a sugar coma. Wake up in a chink of stealing your kidneys. Nick, why do you have to say, chick?
Starting point is 00:01:50 Because it was a. From China. Speaking of that, that's getting a little messy. Anyways, welcome to the live lineup where it's free shows all day. If you want to watch AdFrey, join Rumble Premium. Don't forget to follow my channel and download the Rumble app. Today I'm going to be talking about the UK. It's stuck in 1984.
Starting point is 00:02:10 Don't think that shit can't head this way. It's already started. Marxist Minnesota is fucking with kids, regardless of the laws. It's unbelievable, man. Nobody's paying attention to laws. Nobody's going to jail. a quick look back at the Scott's visit to the United States during the World Cup, specifically Boston, and they found a beer that they love.
Starting point is 00:02:32 We're going to cover some women problems, and Dr. Nick will clear that up to you, ladies. I'll show you a clip of a gymnast. I don't know how he's still alive today. That's all I'm going to say. And I'll actually give you a trigger warning because I watch it like this. It was almost that bad. Anyways, the violence. First of all, Trump, it's getting
Starting point is 00:02:55 now I just read a quick headline. Didn't mean get into the article. You know, they're a little nervous because it looks like maybe China and Russia holding, no, Iran. Iran and China. No, Russia and China.
Starting point is 00:03:11 As far as the Iran war, it looks like Russia and China a kind of, you know, meddling, which could make it really fucking ugly. So, I don't know where that's going to go. And all the idiots at home are going to go, oh my God, look all the gas prices and all that other fucking horseshit
Starting point is 00:03:28 and, you know, whatever. One quick thing about all this Democratic Socialists of America take. Let me tell you something, folks. And they're doing well on these fucking so-called, I've said fuck a lot, I'm very tight, these so-called election.
Starting point is 00:03:45 Some of them mean a lot, some don't. But they're doing way better. They get more traction than they should in this country. but don't you think for a second and it's so gross mandami I mean just today in France some guy with two knives
Starting point is 00:04:02 yells a la Akbar and stabs some woman to death and France comes out and goes we're not calling it terrorism yet but the fact that that shit has got that and that anti-Semitism and you know they always used to say anti-Semitism is up when Trump took over or when Reagan or Bush
Starting point is 00:04:22 They always said the hate against the Jews, you know. But this time, it really is up, but it's coming from the left, you know. And it's outrageous. And the violence this weekend, I just told Dallas, I didn't even, I didn't even bother mentioning a mass shooting in Seattle, you know, a nice sunny Sunday. They're at a food festival or whatever. And it looked like two brothers. And they always say this, they're shooting at each other in the middle. of a bunch of other people.
Starting point is 00:04:53 I don't believe that for a second. I believe it, but I know they know that they're going to kill some innocent people. I really do. Matter of fact, I might even go further and go, you know, a lot of gang initiations, you have to kill innocent people. So it happens too often where,
Starting point is 00:05:11 oh, they get caught in the crossfire. I don't know, that's just my theory. Either way, right? You had that one. You had a 72-year-old woman. She's writing a children's book because she just became a grandma. She's walking to the bank or something.
Starting point is 00:05:26 And some guy comes up and stabs her to death from behind. In California, in some Spanish name town, you know, San Obispo, it wasn't that one, but you know what I'm saying. Just stabbed her from behind to death in this country. And a couple other ones I'm forgetting. Didn't you mention one before when we were talking about it? You brought one up and I was like, oh yeah, even that one. What?
Starting point is 00:05:51 It's in the show. in the show. But these mass shootings and shit, they don't even, oh, NYPD cop, his kid in the Bronx is outside a bodega and a bra breaks up between, you know who, and he ends up getting shot in a chest and dying.
Starting point is 00:06:09 12 years old, innocent, runs into the bodega holding his chest. He was on his bike, had nothing to do with it. This is America, folks. So I said I didn't report those, but I just did. it's fucking insane out there it's insane Berlin
Starting point is 00:06:25 another guy at least the German said this is Islam and it's the enemy this guy took his truck into an LGBT parade fucking he's not even original it's been done anyways that's just a few little things
Starting point is 00:06:40 and I know yeah it's a big world and all that chick goes on and we hear about it all that it's but when it's happened every weekend and barely gets a mention in the news is what creeps me up it's what keeps me up
Starting point is 00:06:50 It's what keeps me up in night, but it really isn't. What the fuck else? Socks, of course. My socks rate, they're as good as anybody right now. Outstanding. When I left, did they still have the winning street going? Oh, was it snapped? It was snapped, yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:11 Well, they took two out of three from Toronto or three out of four. I can't remember. But now they're winning at home on a regular basis. The nine games are over 500 on the road. road and now they're winning like they're supposed to it, Fenner. And I still, that's not the story. It's the fucking no names that are doing it. Chad Tracy, I don't care how this ends.
Starting point is 00:07:31 I bet she's going to be manager of the year. If they keep it up, hey, who knows? But we got a guy from the nationals. And by the way, the Washington Nationals are a fucking offensive juggernaut this year. They lead the league in home runs and a run scored and all the chairs. And we got one of their home run hitters in a trade yesterday. This kid, Curtis Mead. He's got 17 gomers.
Starting point is 00:07:54 And he had all kinds of promise. And then he fucked up his swaying a year to it. But he's worked that out, I guess. Anyways, we got rid of a pitcher that I love. This kid, Connor early. He looks like Matt Damon with long hair. Baby-faced kid. Coming out of camp, he got a starting job with the socks.
Starting point is 00:08:12 Nobody knew who this kid was. Coming out of camp, he could get thrown into the rotation, a lefty, little guy who throws hard. And I'm like, I love this kid. We had to give him up to get. right-handed power. Anyways, sorry to bore you with that. That's about it.
Starting point is 00:08:25 I ate chicken wings and I try to cut the grass and the fucking electric llama of battery dot. Welcome to the bourgeoisie, as they say. I'm fucking swearing, throwing it around on the... I'm just trying to do good on a Sunday. It's 110 out there. I'm fucking...
Starting point is 00:08:43 I cut the front lawn. That took about 20 minutes and it thinks fucking dies. And I go put it on the thing. And it says it's three quarters charged. So I give it another half hour. come back out fucking go about another five minutes went into the shed shut the door so Andy couldn't hear
Starting point is 00:09:01 and I just started winging shit around like a fucking child ah ah your sister's box what the fuck right on that dent I have of my shin I told you guys about that fucking thing
Starting point is 00:09:15 let's get going on my neck's broken two don't get old folks as my dad used to say and I used to look at him and go shut the fuck up like I have a choice and then he'd hit me with a monkey wrench in the teeth. Forgot those twice on the weekend. This is how I know them all.
Starting point is 00:09:32 They go, I don't give a shit. Went out with no teeth. How you doing? Pretty good. I'm a fucking Georgia Hillbill. I love it. Fucking love the South. Always will.
Starting point is 00:09:41 UK stuck in 1984. A school chaplain in the United Kingdom, that's England for you people who aren't big on geography, who was fired and blacklisted after preaching a sermon on LGBTQ issues. Now, you're probably going to mean he was pro? No, no, he's against
Starting point is 00:10:01 it because he's a priest, has reached a confidential settlement with his former employer ending a seven-year legal battle. This is in England now, folks. The Reverend Bernard Randall in ordained, hey, get some son, father. An ordained church of England minister worked for five
Starting point is 00:10:17 years as a chaplain at Trent College. He was a running back and doesn't look at. an independent school for K through 12 students in Derbyshire, England. In 2018, Randall grew concerned when the school partnered with, get this, educate and celebrate. That word celebrate.
Starting point is 00:10:39 Celebrate how you were born. I like snatch. Where's my party? Right from the get-go. I had a crush on Kathleen Sullivan, first grade. Blonde hair, blew out. Even back then. Blonde hair blew eyes.
Starting point is 00:10:53 Missing the front tooth. Cute as a blue. button. I stalked her like a psycho. I got a Tarzan lunchbox. Two story. An outside group whose stated goal was to smash. This group wanted to teach this. Smash heteronormitivity and embed queer theory in school culture. The group has since dissolved. You know why? They made a sugar. I objected to it at the time it started and tried to discuss it with the senior leadership, but they weren't interested. The following year, a student asked Randall why pupils were quiet to accept LGBTQ ideology at a Christian school. People didn't even, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:11:36 That we got this shit shoved. Again, this is Engel, but it goes on over here. They came on so strong with this shit that nobody even questioned it. You know, I mean, that was the environment. Don't you dare question it. Yeah, so some student asked, why do we have to accept us at a Christian school? Randall said that question along with similar concerns raised by other students and staff prompted him to deliver a sermon on freedom of belief and conscience.
Starting point is 00:12:02 Listen to how outrageous his speech was. In his chapel address, Randall told these young students they were entitled to hold their traditional Christian beliefs on marriage and biological sex while emphasizing that they must show respect to do to those whom they disagree with. Can you imagine he is way far right? Crazy, it's like a Klansman. Days later, school administrators summoned Randall to a meeting, interrogated him. I think we have it on surveillance.
Starting point is 00:12:35 What are your true feelings towards Big Brother? I hate him. You must love him. It's not enough to obey him. You must love him. Did you hear what he said? He says, I hate him. And the guy goes to mad about him.
Starting point is 00:12:50 You have to love him. You have to love him. That's what he said. Anyways, they suspended him and launched an investigation. He was also reported to local law enforcement and prevent, whatever the fuck that is. It's a defense over here. The UK government's counterterrorism program. They reported him to a counterterrorism program for that little speech.
Starting point is 00:13:11 What is going on over there? And why Prevent ultimately determined he did not pose a terrorist threat. they had a meeting whether this guy pose it meanwhile this isn't a country if you walk down the street and you could get stabbed by a Muslim for looking at them wrong they have their own neighborhoods try walking through one with a fucking
Starting point is 00:13:34 Bible in your hand also all the rape gangs that's quietly pushed into the rug no terrorism there the government's involved in it that's not terrorism so do you see what happened they fucking and somebody wrote it not me but they do is more eloquent about it. Only civilization, the Western Civilian,
Starting point is 00:13:53 that opened its arms, opens its doors to a fucking culture that's actively hostile towards it. And there you go. In addition, the Diocese of Derby blacklisted Randall as its safeguarding risk to children. Well, that would be true over here with priests, but I don't think this.
Starting point is 00:14:12 Trent College eventually fired Randall. Can you imagine for gross misconduct? He was reinstated on appeal, but under strict conditions that restricted his sermon to topics and required prior administrative approval for chapel content. In other words, you know, they do that when people over here get fired like on the right saying the wrong thing. Well, we'll let you come back, but you can't mention the word Republican or God.
Starting point is 00:14:39 Furlough during the pandemic, Randall was ultimately made redundant. That means his job was useless. All laid off on December 31st of. of 2020. That vision is still a best-selling novel and his prophecy remains as terrifying as ever. If you want a vision of the future, Winston, imagine a boot stamping on a human face forever. A future where freedom becomes slavery. Where privacy is forbidden, the past, forgotten.
Starting point is 00:15:16 Sound familiar? People simply vanish. Oh, there goes Nick DePa. No, he's too low on the food, Gene. We don't care about him. Let him shoot his mouth down. There you go. A few people who haven't read the book,
Starting point is 00:15:31 please read the book, and see the movie, and then do it again. Later on. I haven't started my action Bible yet. The comic book Bible. Fucking thing's beautiful. I'll tie it out much. We weighs about 11 pounds.
Starting point is 00:15:50 A lot of it's advertising. No, it's not. It's very nice. Excuse me. Speaking of advertising, we have a new sponsor that I'm very proud of. Want a pouch with no nicotine, no caffeine, just the good stuff? Of course you do. Excuse me.
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Starting point is 00:16:31 Cool mint, wintergreen, which was big when I used to dip up in Maine, a tropical watermelon in all the new blue razz. You know where I tried these? Last time I was in Dallas doing Crowder's show in that area at the hotel. There was a kid. I don't know if he represented this country. excuse me, company some way.
Starting point is 00:16:53 And I saw him with a little, and he gave me one. And it was, I could feel it. It woke me up. And like they said, it was like, it was almost delicious.
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Starting point is 00:17:46 Please do. Real quick, folks. November 5th, they'll be the punchline Atlanta, Georgia. November 6th, the next night, River Casino in Philly. The next night after that, November 7th, sold Jolz and Potschtown, PA. Go to Nick Dip.com to get your tickets now before they are sold out and buy something on the merch page. We have all kinds of stuff, as you see there. I mean, come on, how many committees have bedpans it?
Starting point is 00:18:11 Made of turquoise. What? Hats and hoodies and all that shit. All right, let's get through it. Also, you want to send a personalized video? I'll say what you're thinking so you don't have to. Book it and it's shoutout.us. It's a lot of fun.
Starting point is 00:18:30 Anyhow, nose is running like I'm a Coke dealer. I wanted to work on the, well, I polished off the chapter about Uncle Bob this weekend. Brought it to a head. Trying to decide what. I should take a poll and ask you guys. I have a couple of stand-up stories, but part of me wants to save that for another book
Starting point is 00:18:56 because AI gave me an interest. That's what people love when you take them behind the scenes at the Oscar Awards, writing for Chris Rock. You know, places that they've seen in Herbert, wonder what goes on behind the scenes, have a lot of that shit opening for Patty LaBelle, Paul Anchor,
Starting point is 00:19:14 and getting in trouble for saying shit once. And I opened up a, Donna, what's the name? Laura Branigan, the song, Gloria, a few people of my age. I have a lot of, but I think that should be for another book. I could get into my first time on stage,
Starting point is 00:19:32 you know, how many beers I had, how it went, and why it ruined my life. You know, so I don't know what to do. Maybe I'll just take one story, like me bombing when I opened for Paul Anka in front of 2,500 people,
Starting point is 00:19:49 probably told it on this. show before in the round where the stage actually rotates and nobody told me that until I got there so I had no idea any I've said this because I've told everybody this Dallas knows I put my drink I thought it was on something that was on the stage
Starting point is 00:20:04 rotating with me but it was a stationary thing so I've got to reach I'm doing my bit and I get thirsty I do one of these and I see my drink going by about a mile away as I'm bombing you understand can't make that shit up so I can maybe throw that one in there and the other thing, me as a door-to-door salesman, I have enough fucking material there to make a movie out of it.
Starting point is 00:20:32 I'm only going to do it if Elliot Page plays me. Fucking freak. I shouldn't say that, but... Kid did all right for himself. I just don't know what it is. It's a dangerous situation. Anyways, yeah, so I'm trying to decide. Also, three most embarrassing moments in my life.
Starting point is 00:20:54 You guys will fucking die at those. that one story about me in a tanning contest. Andy says it's the funniest fucking thing since she's met me that I've ever told her because I was humiliated. Who doesn't want their husband humiliated in public? And a ski accident. I hit a guy going about 80 because I didn't know how to ski.
Starting point is 00:21:14 And pulling the mic, the cord falling out in front of 800 people and me trying to get it in. That's the opening of a show at the Montreal Comedy Festival. I wanted to kill somebody. I said, somebody set me up. There's no way that fucking happened. That's my paranoia. Let's move on to Marxist indoctrination on display in Minnesota.
Starting point is 00:21:32 What a surprise. Let me guess there's lakes in Minnesota, too. Minnesota is ready-to-hand transgender dolls with removable, interchangeable genitals to children as young as four years old in their school classrooms. What bothered me? I went to Dallas's house.
Starting point is 00:21:50 He's homeschooling his kids. And I saw some of these on the counter. Dallas goes, those are my kids. There's nothing to do with the kids. Yeah, exactly. You hear that? You said that like Edward G. Robinson. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:22:04 Yeah, where's your Moses now? Look at my wife's gynecologist just called. Left a message. I'm not kidding you. You want something to do with Instagram. I know if you want me to plug them on it, show them how to use it. I'm like, you're barking up the wrong tree or Bush. The New York Post reports, first of their kind, that's in quotes,
Starting point is 00:22:25 multi-sex dolls will debut in some Minnesota classrooms this fall with junior students specifically target junior students, little kids. Even when they say junior, it sounds like a junior in high school. Don't fuck with the language. The paper dolls with gender-neutral names like Sam. That used to be a male name when I was a kid, but, you know, Samantha, Sam, Rory, Avery, and Parker. no pat have removable
Starting point is 00:23:00 internal and external genitals that means the vagina is internal I guess the prick is external oh is it is not according to my book at home
Starting point is 00:23:16 I written by Elliot Page calls where my junk at Negro along with more than a hundred interchangeable pieces of clothing excess boy hairstyles boy not just
Starting point is 00:23:28 enough to be trans you gotta be a gay trans does that even make sense they say and this is the this is they say it's like a trans mister or mrs potato head the outlet further uh records the goal is for kids to learn about the different options that exist for who they can be yeah that would be a man or a woman shut your fucking pie hole and any you parents uh if you're not school if you're not homeschool and i don't blame if you aren't because most people are you're not school and you can i don't blame if you aren't because Most people don't have the fucking time, but have a meeting with a teacher and have dad beat the fucking snot out of them. Go to jail for your kid. Show your kid that you love them.
Starting point is 00:24:14 Of course, I'm not endorsing violence. I'm just joking around, but do something. Key the faggot's car or fucking kill its pet. According to a therapist at the University of Minnesota Medical School, which spent over half a decade developing, why don't we blow that school up? I'm just kidding, folks. The controversial project made possible by leftist Minnesota governor. Tim Jazz Hands, Tampon, Waltz.
Starting point is 00:24:49 You know, I fucking hate the way you make me fucking ride you. Get the fuck out of here. The My Gender Dolls website offered few details about the project, excuse me, but said join the wait list. And that's what it says on the, I went to it. I thought I was going to jerk off to something, but nothing. Join the wait list and launching 2026.
Starting point is 00:25:11 Look at that. Looks like a WMBA locker room. I keep watching Sophie Cunningham because the world loves her. The Internet loves her, at least people that think the way we do. And they keep running, and it's got ACDC music under it, and it's just highlights of her getting in black, angry lesbian's faces like there's any other kind.
Starting point is 00:25:40 And just that finger-pointing thing was the funniest thing To watch how the black woman reacted She's just going like this Black woman's losing her shit Like teasing a dog with a fucking bone Oh my God And she's fucking cute as a button That's a lot of women
Starting point is 00:25:58 Six foot or whatever but my God Fucking wrap your legs around my neck three times Like a fucking python choke me out And then wake me up by peeing on me That ought to get somebody to watch the show. Did I tell you, I'm German? They come with interchangeable accessories and removable and swappable genitalia to help children realize all the different options that exist.
Starting point is 00:26:28 I already read that, regardless of body parts. Who said that? University of Minnesota post-archal faggot, I mean fellow Ben Partum, Ph.D. Look at this. Look at this guy. Couldn't have been gayer if that was a fucking. Petri dish full of load. Look at this thing.
Starting point is 00:26:51 Look at this. Oh. Just a... There's no way he doesn't talk like this. Just no way. Watched a couple thousand more jeopardies to him. I'd say, I don't know, 75% had a gay person on it. So, yeah, there's nothing going on there.
Starting point is 00:27:13 I also watched a documentary last night on the biggest loser, because I never watched the show when it was on. I didn't realize it ran forever in one, lady died on the beach and came back. They brought back to life and shit. But they all have the same mentality, fat obese people. Now they're all blaming the show and it was wrong. They all have them. That's
Starting point is 00:27:32 what made you fat in the first place. You're a victim. You see yourself as a victim. Even a lady going, I had three kids and I was more worried about raising them. Yeah, my mother had five. And she still weighed what she did in high school because she took care of herself. Fucking victim, weh, wah, wah, whack.
Starting point is 00:27:48 every weight loss commercial by the way if it's about women always starts with maybe you can't shed that extra 20 pounds from the kids yeah buffina abula take a big dump by the way I'm taking beautiful movements did you hear Dallas
Starting point is 00:28:07 he's German he's envious I'm doing my you know what Dr. Gundy's you'd be proud of me shark blast Dallas every morning shark to the top Now, at risk, I might have to cut back a little because I went through a bottle in about a week.
Starting point is 00:28:25 You know, and they're about 40 bucks a box. He said you only need a half a tablespoon or whatever to fuck. But no, I want a short glass. Everything just moves along. I don't know. Read up on that. Watch Gundy's thing to the end. I don't give a fuck, you know.
Starting point is 00:28:44 And it tastes, you know why you'd like it? Because you can tell there's not, it tastes just like, they did nothing to it. It's like fucking pure olive oil. It's kind of, I don't want to say rancid, but it's arid, almost dry and bitter. You know what I mean? I get used to it,
Starting point is 00:29:03 but I'm just saying it tastes like it's good for you. You know, like Poonani. Let's move on to the left barely a drop. Oh, look how I spelt it like bear. I mean, beer. I can't even say it. Fucking. During the 2020 World Cup,
Starting point is 00:29:18 this is uh we're looking back on the world cup i think it was a feel good story of the year as they say that all those people came over here from europe expecting the worst from america because that's all they were fed in their media and just falling in love whether it was ribs at a gas station fucking um you know pizza in a box you can buy at a supermarket and they just fell in love ranch dressing they fucking they're ordering that shit now like you know they're addictive to it. I don't get that one. That one, I just don't get that one. My wife likes it and fucking
Starting point is 00:29:54 there was a very funny you think he was a Jewish writer for S&L, very funny stander, very dry, very New York. But he had a bit about taking out this dream girl that he was courting forever and
Starting point is 00:30:10 he brings it to this like really, really fine one of the best restaurants in New York. I think it was a French Le Circ or one of the and then, you know, they're ordering, and he's like, yeah, all the steak, and blah, and they get to the woman, she goes,
Starting point is 00:30:27 I'll have the whatever, and the salad. Do you have ranch? Just the way he said. I'm not doing it justice, but in a French restaurant, you got ranch? Anyways, that's how I see ranch. During the 2026 World Cup tournament, the Scotchews Boston as their home base,
Starting point is 00:30:48 whether it was Fenway Park, or the local pub. The Scottish fans drank multiple establishments. And this is true, dry. You know how hard? Boston, you understand? We're not talking about Utah, whatever, a religious city, Salt Lake City or some shit. We're talking about Boston.
Starting point is 00:31:15 No one's ever run out of booze in Boston. It's one thing that hasn't changed. The fucking blood is Irish. The local pub, the Scottish fans drank multiple establishes. one example was the black rose i can't believe that's still there i fucking uh the bar had never gone dry in its 50 year history with Scottish travelers around the venue ran out of drinks including water for the first time did they ever hear our song love that dirty water for the first time they actually ran out of all the booze and water at the black row
Starting point is 00:31:49 Scotland played two out of its three world cup games at jillette stadium right in foxborough mass that's why they were hanging out in boston During that time, the fans known as the Tartan Army, that's another word for plaid, they said. I googled. Fell in love with one particular American staple native to the area, Samuel Adams Beer. Look at that.
Starting point is 00:32:10 That's a real picture. Is that in a bar? Holy fuck. Can you imagine trying to serve this? In particular, the Scotch loved Sam Adams, Boston Lager, which is delicious, by the way, I'll tell you. So much that the brewery pub ran out. What I like about it is they like
Starting point is 00:32:28 the Boston line. They didn't go for it with a hint of faggotry in it and fucking lemon drops and fucking leave it on. Ooh, the autumn, I don't want the autumn flavor. Pumpkin spice, suck a dick. Give me a fucking beer that tastes like a beer. I'm not ordering dessert, you jerk off. Sorry for the
Starting point is 00:32:44 attitude. That was me to a manager at the cask and flagging. The company told ABC news in June that its flagship tap tap room went dry after the tartan army drank four times. The tap, that means you know, like the brewery itself, the home quarters,
Starting point is 00:33:02 drank four times what is typically sold all during Scotland's first. I love to hear when stereotypes aren't stereotypes. And they're real. Do they ever sleep? Do they ever get tired what employee asked? Black. This spawned an emergency order to prepare for the next game and the rest is history. now the new favorite is officially available in Scotland
Starting point is 00:33:29 for fans to pound on their home turf and in the article after that sentence to pound on their home turf it said responsibly in parentheses it did oh my god and that's again that's a world where people live under the threat of lawsuits very fucking horseshit
Starting point is 00:33:54 UK based online craft beer retailer Bear Hunter. I like that. Beer Hunter. Oh, we should do a movie. You know, a playoff on deer hunt, only beer hunting. We somehow make it funny. Beer Hunt is now officially carrying Sam Adams' Boston Lager on its website. As an import, it's obviously going to cost a few quid. I always think of fish when I hit it.
Starting point is 00:34:18 Currently listed on sale, listen to this. $56 for a 12-pack. What's it got Sam Adams jizzing it? Holy moly, down from its usual price of $62. Oh my God, $5 a beer. We saw incredible interest after the Tartan Army made headlines in Boston, so we thought would take advantage of the drunks. Smith said he was delighted to bring the beer back to Scotland
Starting point is 00:34:47 while praising its tradition. The beer had become scarce in Scotland. Somewhere around between 2023 and 2024, it was very hard to find over there. It's very weird because one of my most surprising facts about beer is Ireland, how much they like Budweiser over there. They must just like the can or something. You know I mean?
Starting point is 00:35:06 But they do. It's like one of the top selling beers. Very odd. Never, even when I was a young kid, not a big Budweiser fan. We had four kids that I played football with. They were all about 6'2, 240. They were called the Bud team. And they would show up at every party with at least three cases of,
Starting point is 00:35:27 bud for them. Like we couldn't touch it, nobody would dare touch it. And they would fucking finish them. Big guys, you know, they would, yikes. Ricky Breen was one of them. Fucking very funny guy I grew up with a good football player.
Starting point is 00:35:44 Anyhow, so yeah, muds up to the Scottish folks for sucking Boston dry. Oh. The weight is over. Here is, oh, we should come up.
Starting point is 00:35:59 You know what? We're going to have to come up of the segment thing. You know, Dr. DePaulo gives medical advice to women. Hey, clean your boxes. What do we get up next? The weight is over. This is interesting. On average, women may have to wait up to 11 years between their first symptoms
Starting point is 00:36:23 and a diagnosis of endometriosis. Look at that. I grew up on Route 128. If you go up the brown part, you take a right. That's the North Shore Mass. And then. Still can't figure it out. I know.
Starting point is 00:36:37 Nobody can. Nobody can. Even the doctor that's taken credit for this, has no fucking idea. I'm looking at Dallas. And because I'm a hetero male that loves college football, I see University of Texas helmet. The Texans.
Starting point is 00:36:53 It's a longhorn. It's a fucking longhorn. Anyways, endometriosis, according to Yale Medicine. But that weight, I said 11 years, right, be maybe drastically shortened thanks to a new test, the endotest. Women come to my house. I have a table in the basement. Tell me, does this hurt?
Starting point is 00:37:19 Yeah. They're nipples tingled. When I stick this one. Earlier this month, the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence, that's nice in the UK, gave the go-ahead for the test, which checks a saliva sample for microRNAs that can indicate whether endometriosis is likely present. So that's good news for the chicks. Personally, I don't give a shit.
Starting point is 00:37:53 I'm still trying to find something that gets semen out of a mouse pad. affecting about one in ten women worldwide endometriosis happens when the uterine tissue grows outside of the uterus causing cramping and chronic pain i tried picturing that i picture like a fur coat made a meat endometriosis symptoms are often seen with other conditions like painful periods oh get up and clean the kitchen Stop with you faking She probably just came from Taco Bell Fucking got the luxury box number nine Whatever often seen
Starting point is 00:38:35 Other kids painful periods Although plenty of women with the disease Have no history of painful periods Or pelvic pain Symptoms can include fatigue Get this fatigue Joint pain Shortness of breath irritable bowels
Starting point is 00:38:49 Urinary frequency apparently I have endometriosis. I get all that shit, folks. My periods have been horrible lately. There is no good blood test or imagining modality, imagining, Jesus, imaging modality that can detect endometriosis. If left untreated, the illness can result in several health complications and not just for certain parts of the reproductive system either.
Starting point is 00:39:21 It'll spread to you dishwash. the fucking vacuums. True story, everybody. In the most severe cases, we see what's called the frozen pelvis. I've been looking for them. In my supermarket at Publix. No avail.
Starting point is 00:39:39 We're always out of frozen pelvis. Which is when chronic inflammation in scar tissue causes the ovaries, bladder, and bowel to fuse together distorting your internal anatomy, which is exactly what McDonald's does to me if I eat it three days in a row. freezes my pelvis to my balls.
Starting point is 00:39:57 These tests are a game changer because they give us answers much earlier without the need for invasive surgery. Who said that? Dr. Gail Busby, a whore who works out of a van on the strip in Vegas, said that. That's what I wrote at the end. Make me a sandwich.
Starting point is 00:40:16 Make me a fucking sandwich. Well, I'm fucking apparently. You're very hungry. Take it easy. Sox had to go back on the West coasts after the game yes they've already been there twice that's the new schedule when you play everybody that's everybody hates that even athletes are making a zillion dollars do not want to fly from boston to fucking the west coast fucking horrible during that winning streak they were stuck
Starting point is 00:40:49 on a plane for 11 hours 11 fucking hours and got home to boston at 5 in the morning and they swept the gang they beat the gang they had to play that day they had to play that day they They beat the Yankees and sweat. And they call them the go and, what do they call them? The show and go socks. Because then after that series, the New York Mets, they were on a plane. Sox on a plane. Again, they got to the, got to those delays, weather, whatever.
Starting point is 00:41:17 They got to where the Mets play, whatever stadium that is, pick any insurance company. And they got there, the game was seven. They got there at quarter of seven and went out and beat the Mets and swept the Mets. during that winning street fucking odd, odd, odd, odd. In our vaudeville segment tonight. And now for Nick's video of the day.
Starting point is 00:41:50 English gymnast Gabrielle Langton has been cleared of serious injury after having a severe accident at super clips. All great clips. After a sickening fall, I got to burrup again. Hold on.
Starting point is 00:42:08 fucking coffee's not you blow one guy and it screws up your throat serious injury after a sickening fall at the Commonwealth Games on Friday lengthen fell head first from three meters to the floor
Starting point is 00:42:23 that's about nine feet after missing his catch on the horizontal mental bar metal bar during the opening day of competition and was taken to a hospital I'll give you I'm going to give you a trigger warning folks
Starting point is 00:42:38 Anytime I'm watching this and stuff like this, whether it's, I don't know, gym, whatever, I always get nervous that somebody's going to land on their head. And I had a cousin, real quick, my cousin, Al, I probably talked about him on the show, late great Al DiPaolo, was a tremendous athlete in high school, president of his class,
Starting point is 00:42:58 went to church every Sunday, let it, he was a varsity, he fucking led it in three sports as a sophomore. He was getting letters from, like, colleges going into his fucking junior year. That's how good he was in football. Anyways, he went into a gym that was left unlocked before school
Starting point is 00:43:15 with some buddies, and they were fooling around on equipment. Jim, and my cousin did a flip off of Swedish, whatever, a horse or whatever, a something box, I forget. But anyways, ended up breaking his neck. Paralyzed from here down. So I am very, I cringe a lot when I'm watching sports, when I see
Starting point is 00:43:35 even a football too head-on, you know, I mean, or somebody has to get that spine board. It fucking, you know. And when I watch this shit, I get extra nervous. I always wait for something like this. And I'm just saying it's graphic, but I'll tell you right now, he's fine. We don't know how. This couldn't have looked worse.
Starting point is 00:43:59 And if you didn't, if you showed me this and didn't tell me I didn't know the ending, I would have bet a million dollars he died. But anyways, check it out. Whoa. One more time. I don't get it. I mean, I do. Obviously, his condition saved him.
Starting point is 00:44:31 It looked. There was, there you go. And like Dallas said, the only way he survived that is being an unbelievable condition and flexibility and, you know what I mean? If that's somebody normal, people die slipping in the tub.
Starting point is 00:44:59 You know, not even half that violent or whatever. That fucker fell from like 10 feet. Jesus. Maybe that's what I need to lose some mind there. Team England said Lankton underwent multiple scans. Right when I read that, I was like, what? He's not dead. On Saturday with very positive results.
Starting point is 00:45:21 19-year-old who has not qualified for any remaining events of the games will be discharged from the hospital on Saturday evening, which was this past week. He's in good spirits and hugely grateful for the many messages of the game. support and the excellent care provided by the medical teams. He is looking forward to being reunited with the team to celebrate his silver medal. He'll have to accept it by blowing through a straw. No. Lankton was a late call.
Starting point is 00:45:49 Listen to this. Again, God works a mysterious ways. He was a late call-up to Team England in the place of the injured six-time Olympic medalist, Max Whitlock. Thanks, Max. And that was Nick's video. of the day. How do you survive that?
Starting point is 00:46:13 I read a thing. When you fall from 30 feet, this is based on statistics. 30 feet, when somebody falls from 30 feet, whether it's a mountain, a tree, a fucking tree house, you have a 50-50 chance of living. Crazy.
Starting point is 00:46:36 Anyways, let's move on to more blood on jerk off Joe Biden's hands. How many people Is he responsible for dying? Him and Fauci ought to be burned alive together in a fucking motel six. On May 17th, Deborah Murphy, an 82-year-old grandmother, was walking back to her car on a crosswalk outside a Publix in Panama City Beach
Starting point is 00:47:02 when she was struck by a Toyota four-runner, according to the court records. She was pushed to the ground by the S-U pushed to the ground. Who writes this shit? Yeah, that's what the car gently goes. She was pushed to the ground by the SUV, but the vehicle continued backing up. In other words, running her over. Running over Ms. Murphy,
Starting point is 00:47:24 according to an arrest affidavit submitted by the Florida Highway Patrol. Of course, they don't show you the whole thing here, but you'll get the idea and the point. You'll go ahead. My, you. Bye-bye. Okay?
Starting point is 00:48:02 Yeah, but it was an accident. Not the point. And maybe it was, maybe it was. It probably was an accent. It doesn't matter. Doesn't fucking matter. I remember Geraldo Rivera arguing with Bill O'Reilly. It's the closest I ever come to see O'Reilly throwing a punch at a guest.
Starting point is 00:48:18 Anytime you did his topic on Latinos or Puerto Ricans, he would get, he'd become irrational. What's his name? Not O'Reilly, fucking Geraldo. We would become irrational and defensive. A woman was killed by a drunk driver who was an illegal alien from Mexico. wasn't supposed to be here. And jerk off Haraldos saying, Bill's saying, well, if he wasn't here,
Starting point is 00:48:38 that wouldn't have happened. It's that simple. And Aralda wouldn't agree with that. Guy went to Columbia. Simple as that. A fucking guy doesn't belong here. Just his name, I would arrest him. Carlos Aswarez-Contreras, 26,
Starting point is 00:49:00 was the driver of the vehicle court record shows. Luis Sanabria, 29, was the front-seat passenger. Both were determined to be in the country illegally, according to arrest records. Under Florida law, an illegal immigrant cannot obtain a state-issue driver's license. However, 19 states, of course, and the District of Columbia do issue licenses to unauthorize. I wonder if those are blue states, according to the National Conference of State Legislatures, At the scene, Santa Maria gave sworn testimony to law enforcement that Suarez Contreras was operating the vehicle at the time of the crash.
Starting point is 00:49:50 Suarez Contreras is being held without bond because of his immigration status and because it is believed that he is a potential flight risk. You know why? Because he's in Florida. Florida. That's why. Most other states, oh, come on.
Starting point is 00:50:11 Here's your grandmother. Just walking in a parking lot of a fucking supermarket. And again, killed by somebody who's here illegally, yet the Democrats will go, there's no such thing as an illegal human being. Or he was seeking asylum from some of bad conditions. Yeah, I know. I can tell by the Michael had Jordan sneakers.
Starting point is 00:50:36 I don't think you suck another dick and die, please. As far as a Democrat socialist, all this shit that's going. It can only go so far before people, seriously, and don't, it's unbelievable. It's so ironic. If this country was won 1,000s as racist
Starting point is 00:50:54 and as, you know, white supremac, as Biden said, do you understand this DSA? People would already been shot. Mondami would have been shot. Seriously, if the white supremacists are doing their job. And it still might come to that.
Starting point is 00:51:08 You can only, you know, we're not going to sit around and watch us turn into England. We're not. The fuck, I'm 64. What do I care? Just give me a good helmet. Dallas will go out in the range and dress somebody up. Have them run.
Starting point is 00:51:28 No, we'll do it like you do when you were shooting pigs from a golf cart. Now, that's the American way. It's fucking tremendous. Let's move on to our final story tonight. He's just another Hollywood leftist blowjob hack. Director Christopher Nolan says that when he was adapting Homer's epic poem, The Odyssey, as his latest film,
Starting point is 00:51:54 he altered the story's ending to omit details that he found too misogynistic. Did you hear what I just said? I understand if he's doing a remake of some fucking shitty movie from the 1940s or whatever. I wouldn't understand, but, you know, this is a little more epic than that and more, a lot of life lessons to learn from it.
Starting point is 00:52:15 It's the original one's impossible to read. Everybody's attempted it and almost committed suicide free pages in. I understand that. But this guy who everybody, oh, blowing was the, you know, the greatest fucking director and blah, blah, blah, blah. He's another Hollywood guy. And he knew the only way it was going to get made. And trust me, it probably wasn't even this idea. The only way it was going to get made.
Starting point is 00:52:38 And the reason they did it, they look at this. This is low to a testosterone and male patriarchy and well. patriarchy in Western whatever the fuck all the shit we hate let's let's put a nice feminist spin on it and I'm gonna say this one more time you guys are sick of me saying it
Starting point is 00:52:54 everything you watch everything if it's law and order a fucking episode of flip this house whatever game shows it's all being run through the empowerment women shit I am so fucking tired
Starting point is 00:53:13 It's why I'm down to the news and sports. When I heard this was coming out, I go, that would be a nice way to get a fucking history lesson. But then I said to Andy, before I heard all this Dallas, then I said to Andy, but I go, why do I have a feeling? Five minutes in, I'm going to want to fucking shoot somebody because they're going to put some type of fucking feminine.
Starting point is 00:53:36 You can ask my wife, before I even read this shit. And then she read before I did, she read Matt Walsh, who's a real conservative, right? He torches people on the left. He'll do it face to face. He wrote about this. Andy said, you wouldn't believe how on you were.
Starting point is 00:53:56 With the Elliott Page being cast, a transgender. A black woman is Helen of Troy. Oh, my God. Just, they took it further than I even would have imagined. And look, I'm sure this guy got paid trillions of dollars, but he also made trillion. already or enough to live on. Can't you just once go, you know what?
Starting point is 00:54:18 No, I'm doing it my way. You know what I mean? I'll go do it independent. Pull a fucking, you know what? What was that guy? Mel Gibson. Right? It's, like I said, it's one thing to do that
Starting point is 00:54:30 to a Jennifer Aniston movie. What's the fucking... The Odyssey will definitely be a financial success thanks apart to its higher than average ticket prices for IMAX screenings, but it has quickly become the most divisive film of Nolan's career and not for the right reasons.
Starting point is 00:54:47 Most pre-release criticism focused on stunt casting and Lupita Nyongo. That's Helen of Troy. On the left, that's the new Helen of Troy. Let's, why don't they do that with like Batman movie? Batman should be a midget. And Robin should have elephant Titus of the balls. Alfred's a fag.
Starting point is 00:55:12 You know what I mean? Put a spin on that shit. Let's go. buck-ass wild we've got a torch classical literature not that Batman falls under that category
Starting point is 00:55:20 Leopita Nyongue is Helena Troy and transvestite actress Elliot Page playing a Greek warrior our father one
Starting point is 00:55:31 is there's Elliot Page that was a girl still is in my opinion but son of a whore yeah I know that's her idea do you see
Starting point is 00:55:43 are you guys getting it how much they hate our culture Hollywood and anyways but negative reactions to the full movie have focused on Nolan's
Starting point is 00:55:56 thematic changes particularly his decision to frame the strategic deception of the Trojan horse he wanted to make the horse shape like a tampon that way he could product placement
Starting point is 00:56:10 true story folks anyways deception of the Trojan horse as an evil so great that it shattered the entire world order and haunts Odysseus conscience to the point of making him not want to go home.
Starting point is 00:56:25 And to omit the tale's gods, i.e., the characters in the story believe the gods exist, but the film's perspective does not depict the gods as real characters who take actions that affect the story. Oh, my God. It's like, oh, let's do jaws, but there's not going to be a shark. It's going to be a sunfish. Quint's not going to have the orca. We're going to have them on a jet ski. little things.
Starting point is 00:56:55 Odysseus speaks with a young woman who is supposed to be Athena but she is merely a hallucination of a young priestess of Athena whose decapitation he saw during the sack of Troy I saw Troy sack in the shower mother of God
Starting point is 00:57:12 Matt Damon has confirmed this interpretation was how he approached his scenes with Zendaya. Matt how do you feel I mean you went to Harvard You know, I understand. Look, he's already, I want to like Matt Damon, too. I do like Matt Damon, but I'm just saying, Christopher Nolan.
Starting point is 00:57:37 My goodness gracious. Anyways, that is it, boys and girls from Monday. I think we covered a lot. And again, I didn't report half the goddamn violence that has become so commonplace that I don't want to bore you with it. I swear to God, that's the mentality. Don't forget Cameo.com. If you'd like me to roast a friend of yours, go to camio.com.
Starting point is 00:58:02 Click on the profile and I'll tell you how to do it. That's it. You guys thinking I'll say it. You are very welcome. We'll see you back here at the same time tomorrow. Have a good day. Hi. Good night, everybody.

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