The Nick DiPaolo Show - Tina Forte | Nick Di Paolo Show #1568

Episode Date: May 9, 2024

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about Jaws and interviews Tina Forte!  Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

🎵 That's fucking beautiful. Thank you. Welcome to the show on a Thursday. A Thursday, folks. Hold on, let me get a sip of something that's not there. Son of a bitch. Welcome. Great show today.

Coming up very quickly on the show, Tina Forte. You know her as Tina from the Bronx, if you're on the Internet a lot. And she's a fiery girl from the Bronx with the heaviest New York accent you ever heard. And she's a true patriot. She backs up. As she says, she doesn't just talk the talk. She walks the walk. Let's get right into it, huh? Winner, winner, great white dinner. This is weird. It's a light story to start the show, but like I said, we get Tina coming up, plenty of heavy. The Massachusetts Estate Lottery has given out another $1 million prize, and the winner is going to need a bigger wallet, whoever the hack was that wrote this. How dare you? Gesamara Silva is now the third

grand prize winner of the Massachusetts lottery's Jaws. I guess this is a new thing, instant game, which became available for purchase on March 22nd, sorry, 26, excuse me, Massachusetts lottery official announced in a recent press release, Silva has lived on Martha's Vineyard. If you haven't been there, it really is a sweet little town. You remember the place. They sent illegals there. Or was that

Nantucket? I always confuse. It was Martha's Vineyard. Remember? And they said, no, no, no, no, no. Even though they had hotel rooms everywhere. No, no, no. We'll send them to a naval bay. Get them out of here. Because they're, you know, fucking left-wing liberal douchebags. Silver has lived on Martha's

Vineyard for 18 years and was inspired to buy the Jaws-themed lottery ticket since the Academy Award-winning movie was filmed on the island, he told officials, which makes me, being the suspicious, cynical jackass I am, okay, so this is a,

I think it's a fairly new thing, this Jaws lottery thing for the Massachusetts. It's a new thing, this Jaws lottery thing for the Massachusetts. It's a new thing. And Jaws was shot on this island. And the first winner on this thing, and they don't just play it on the fucking island, they play it all over Massachusetts, is a guy from the island where they shot Jaws. I mean, it sounds like a genius marketing scheme to me.

I hate to be so cynical, unless everybody hates sharks in the rest of Massachusetts. Anyways, that's where it was filmed. And I know that because listen to this. When that movie came out in 1975 or 76, I saw the movie, I read the book, and I stayed on Martha's Vineyard that summer just for a week. My uncle's brother had a place down there. And you tell me I wasn't immersed in John. I was afraid to go into the frigging water.

I was 14 years old, and it really, I'm like, but I was so immersed reading that book every night. I had already seen the movie, knowing I look out this guy's window, it's right where they shot the frigging thing. It was one of my best summers ever. Actually, a week of the summer, I should say. Anyway, Silva chose to receive his prize in the form of a one-time payment.

$650,000 before taxes. Quint? Prove that you wealthy college boys don't have the education enough to admit when you're wrong. What do you mean? He was right on. The Jaws Instant Game includes three $1 million grand prizes, which have now all been claimed following Silva's win. Here's just a little promo for the...

Notice the color of the water in the background of this video. Check it out. Oh, my God. oh my god all's is missing is the yellow raft and the in mrs kettner's kid how good was she when she cracked him across the face and that was fucking real and uh what was the other what was the what was the dog's name? I remember the kid was going, oh, fuck, me either. That's a trivia question. I know, but it's an easy one. I had it up for a hundred years.

I remember his dog was missing something like Skipper or whatever, or Trudy, some baggy shit. It also features a series of five second chance drawings. We're back to the lottery. In which a total of 30 lucky winners are being awarded a Jaws-inspired trip for two to Martha's Vineyard in the summer of 2025. This would be great. While on the vineyard,

all 30 trip winners will participate in a Jaws-themed game show in which one contestant is guaranteed to win a million dollar prize. All other contestants will win a guaranteed prize ranging from $500 to $10,000. The trip includes a three-night stay at Harborview Hotel.

I think I stayed at that place. I did a couple shows on the vineyard, comedy shows. They have their own thing. In Edgartown, black car service. So that's what, a purple Lincoln takes you everywhere? Black car service to and from the port and a ferry to and from the island. There's also a daily breakfast plus a welcome toast slash dinner at Harborview Hotel, a taste of the vineyard dinner at Harborview Lawn, a spending cash gift of $1,000,

a Jaws-branded welcome gift, a Jaws Island tour with a custom-guided bus across the island, a private Jaws movie screening, a prostitute dressed like a shark to your room at Harborview Hotel, and a shark-infested waters theme party on Harborview Lawn. Don't forget to bring your own chum. He's like, yeah, I live here. I already know.

It's the end of the story to you fair spanish ladies ladies of spain for we've received orders for the sale back to boston and so nevermore shall we see you again. Keep laughing. Anyways,

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Again, that's nickdip.com. Click on store. Thank you guys so much. See you soon. My guest today, and I've been dying to talk to her for quite a while. Talked to her probably, I don't know, four or five years ago when she was on with Cumia. You guys know her as Tina from the Bronx.

She's running for some type of House of Elections, I think, 14th District. She's going to have to explain it to me because I didn't know how many levels of government they were. I just know that they're all fucked up. She's entertaining. She's funny. She's good looking. She's Italian. What the hell

else do you want? It's my marginal friend, soon to be good friend, Tina Forte. Tina. Hello, Nick. Thank you for that. I love that introduction. Yeah, you know, I wing a lot of shit. I'm not into homework.

Thank you for doing that. Seriously, I stumbled over you on the internet like a lot of people, and I said, who the hell is this? When you were doing those short clips from your car. Rants from my car. From your car. Rants from her car. From my car.

From her car, folks. From my car. Put my American flags on. It went unmasked. The children written all over it. Forget about it. It doesn't get it. We need somebody like this.

The New York accent, first of all, the heavier the better. That's all I'm going to say. It's like the Southern accent. We find it sex younger. I find the New York accent, and I'm from Boston. I'm a fucking, I have a retarded accent. But first of all, how did,

and I've asked you this before, how did Hollywood, did you do any acting or anything? How did Hollywood miss out? You should be in a Marissa Tomei or who's the- No, never did any acting. Who is it? I'm real and raw. Never did any acting.

I'm just real and raw. I say it as it is. Who's my cousin Vinny? Was that, who was the broad? Yes, that's it. My cousin Vinny, Marissa Tomei. Oh, it was Marissa Tomei. Every time I've seen that, you pop it to my head. You would have been perfect for that.

At least a sitcom, for Christ's sake. In the Bronx, with a little bit of right wing. I was born and raised. I was born and raised in the Bronx. That's my district. That's my district that's falling apart, thanks to AOC. So, you know what? What better time to

jump in and bring the fight right to her what what is the congress what is the it's you're running for something called the house of elections do i have that right i'm running for congress in the 14th congressional district in the bronx and queens and and that's i'm running against the beast herself alexandria ocasio-cortez also known as aoc and i have a few choice words for the c but i won't say them on this show she beat me to it this is what i'm talking about you understand this is sexy shit um yes that's her district and and uh and believe me i even lefties if they heard you talk on the issues for five minutes and then her, because I'm getting a feeling New Yorkers, even lefties are sick of her shit.

I mean, she cost them zillions of dollars. Was it Amazon? Yeah, Amazon. Yeah. Amazon. Now she's cheering on the little terrorists on the college campuses. Yeah. She's cheering them on.

That's cool. You know, if they were at one one day if they spent one day in Gaza they'd be beaten tortured and terrorized for the same people that they're cheering for and she's Well, that's their side. Well, that's about New York is backwards. It's a one-party rule Democrat rule we got high taxes. We got a cops can't do our job that handcuffed me while she has private security You know, she's a communist cheerleader. that's all she is and she actually auditioned for her job she auditioned for it she got the part then she beat joe crowley and look now we're stuck with her and i'm here to say stand with me walk with me let's fight with you i don't back down i stand my ground let's take it

new york is ground zero if we don't win new york we don't have a shot we really are in bad shape that's true your your district um i mean is it since she got elected i don't believe in any of them by the way i've been saying this my show forever and i always bring up like Lori Lightfoot leaving Chicago. And then they bring in this self-avowed communist, whatever his name is. And you want me to believe that the people voted that guy in. Same with the district attorneys who are sponsored by George Soros money and shit. I don't believe any of these things. People are elected. They're appointed now. Right, exactly. Your district, AOC's in there.

Is it typical New York? Is it left wing normally? Or is it changing? No, it is a very Democratic area. It's mostly Democrat. But you have a lot of the Latinos. Yes. And you have the Blacks sit there now.

And you have them all leaving. And they're Trump supporters. And they're Tina supporters. This is my second time running in Congress. Now, the first time I was not endorsed by the party. I was an America first candidate and I fought the party. I forced the primary and I beat the handpicked guy because I'm not afraid to fight. Like, I won't back down. Who was the guy you beat?

Was it Crowley? I beat Desi. Oh, Desi. His name his name is Desi. Good. His last name. Something like good. Desi something. He was handpicked. I was the America first girl they didn't like you know, around, ran around my Trump flags and my Tina flags and you know, the Nancy Pelosi flag ripping up the Constitution. You know, I was too loud for them. And they didn't pick me last time.

But I did beat them. I beat them at the primary. So then I ran. But I only, the primary was in August. I only had two months to really campaign. Now I had nobody running against me. It's me against AOC. And I'm telling her, bring it on.

I want to debate her. She backs down from debates. I think what they're doing to Trump is sickening. It's disgraceful how they're weaponizing our government. New York is what Trump calls a third world shithole country. That's what New York has become. Oh, yeah. New York has become. We need to change it. I want Donald Trump to walk the streets of me in the South Bronx. I just gained the South Bronx in this redistricting, which is Reverend Ruben Diaz's area. He's a Democrat. He endorsed me. He's going to walk the streets with me in the South Bronx. Ruben Diaz endorsed you? Yes, he did. I did not know that. That's no, that's huge. That's huge. Yes, it is. Wow. Yes, it is. So the South Bronx was

always a shithole. What's it look like now that all of New York? I just I had a lunch in there last week. And actually wasn't bad. They're building it up. I met a business owner. I had a nice conversation. He let me keep my palm cards there. But the problem is everyone's closing early. They're afraid of the crime because our police are handcuffed while the criminals are just running rampant on the illegal immigration is a disgrace. I'm the one who single handhandedly fought Orchard Beach when they brought the tents there. And I said, October 1st is an adopted and illegal immigrant day. You're voting for a couple of people to get one.

And all of a sudden, the tents were gone. Fucking beautiful. That's what I'm talking about. And that stuff, again, we're talking to Tina Forte by the way at Tina Forte USA that's on on XAOC.com as I like to say fire them all and finish the wall alright this is called what do they call this like door-to-door retail politics she's great at it. I would love to see you walk with Trump.

And Trump, believe me, Trump would love to walk with you too. Let's be honest. Not too many ugly broads in his circle. So yes, let me ask you about, how does like a guy, like I said before, I don't believe Eric Adams. Really? He got elected? That was, after fucking de Blasio.

I'm going, they're going to bring in somebody right wing, a little bit right, or even more. You want me to believe that this guy, he's almost illiterate when he talks. I could correct his grammar every time he opens his mouth. Obviously a decent guy because he was a top cop and shit, but he's just more of the same. What's your opinion on him and the job he's done with them oh i don't like him i don't think he backs the blue at all he talks a good game but he doesn't walk the walk he talks but he doesn't walk

so he says he backs up police he hasn't backed our police he's taken our tax dollars and he's given illegal immigrants a thousand dollars he's given housing. We have veterans that are homeless, right? American citizens that are homeless, right? Okay, we have our police that are getting beaten spit on everything. He does nothing about it. Nothing. And no one speaks up about it. And he's an 80. And he's a cop. He was came in as a law and order guy. That's why I don't believe in any of this shit. I feel like they're appointed.

On order guy. No. I'm not a Law & Order girl. I walk the streets of Manhattan with a big flag that said, Law & Order, back the blue. Not back the blue shirt. I'm the one who made it on the cover of the Italian magazine called OG because I was fighting in the street with Antifa

when I was walking the flag from Trump Towers down to Times Square, getting water bottles thrown at my head. Frozen ones, mind you. Okay. Because I'm not afraid to take the fight right out there. I'm not afraid to rally or protest, but for the right reasons, back out blue, raise their salary, give them back the qualified immunity. What's wrong with this? We're backwards. I'm worried because first of all, there's tons of New York cops retiring in droves. And the young kids are like, I'm not going to fucking risk my neck for $30,000 a year

and be handcuffed, right? I mean, what? That's exactly it. They're afraid to do their job. They have to, any little thing. They don't even show up to car accidents anymore. They don't even, you can't get a cop to show up at a car accident. Well, that's good news for women.

Wait, you want to hear this? Now in my district, right on Tremont Avenue where I was born and raised, they have these big giant cameras and it says NYC Police Department. Okay, New York City Police Department. So you have these giant robots that are saying that are going to help lower crime. What are they going to jump off? The robots are going to jump off and arrest people? Right. That's Big Brother watching us. watching us right absolutely we became a police state we became a police state thanks to all the democrats that keep voting in does it where are you it seems

like to me that donald trump is when he says i'm the only thing that stands between them getting to you it it almost seems literally the case. I don't think of anybody else on the right after Trump who could do, you know, maybe DeSantis wouldn't make a bad president. I believe he's a law and order guy, whatever. But I'm saying after those two guys, we have, if Trump ends up in jail,

I mean, who do we got as far as leadership, Tina? Other than fucking you. Because they got no because they got they got no they got no cuyons yeah they say in italian yeah i go with cojones yes they don't they don't they don't have them and that that's the problem is you have spineless republicans that are in office also i know i know i see ted cruz i want to like these guys he's a smart guy i mean even dershowitz said he was his best student at harvard School. So I know he's a smart guy. I see guys like Jim Jordan out there trying to fight the good fight. And now I resent them. I go, is this just for show? They

always do these hearings and they're grilling people. Nothing ever happens. Nothing happens. So I feel like they're part of the problem. Listen, you got to hold back everybody's federal funding. If you're going to let these protests happen, then that college doesn't get federal funding. If you're not going to unhandcuff our police, then you don't get federal funding. How do you like that? Because Congress holds the power of the purse. You never hear them say that. You never hear them say, we're going to hold back your funding.

No. Why? Why? I hold back your funding. I hold it back. Yeah. I'll pass a bill. I'll hold back everybody's funding until we go back to law

and order and the right thing in this country what about our flag my flag it's tattooed on my arm i love the american flag is that the flag not burning the american flag i have my dad's people heart tattooed on me i have a marine emblem right here because my dad was first marine corps i have my spot metal because i carry wounded warriors on Spartan courses. I'm the real deal. I'm the one to take the fight to AOC. And I've been taking it even before I decided to get stuff. I was in the street.

That's how I met you. I was out there fighting for our children and getting thrown off school properties and getting banned from my granddaughter's school for a year. I couldn't go on her school property for an entire year. They didn't want me there. I stood outside the school with a sign that said, how to unmask our children for for a year. I couldn't go on our school property for an entire year. They didn't want me there. I sat outside the school with a sign that said, Hong Kong mask our children for the entire year. Nobody's working half that hard in DC. Exactly. Hey, for those of you guys on

Mug Club, stick around for the second half of the show. Again, the great Tina Forte. Everyone else, go to nickdip.com. Join to get my full show, Steve and Crowder's full show, and a whole lot more. And while you're there, click on the tour things. Again, gigs coming up this weekend. Friday night, two shows, Soul Joels in Pottstown, Pennsylvania,

7 to 9.30. The very next night, May 11th, Count Basie Theater, Red Bank, New Jersey. Excited for all of the, both these nights are going to be great. So do that. And I hope to see you out there. Hi, good night, everybody. I won't take all that they hand me down And make out I smile though I wear a frown And I'm not gonna take it all lying down

Cause once I get started I go to town Cause I'm not like everybody else, no, no I'm not like everybody else, no, no I'm not like everybody else I'm not like everybody else, well I'm not like everybody else And I don't wanna live my life like everybody else And I don't wanna to live my life like everybody else And I don't want to be destroyed like everybody else And I don't want to get a job like everybody else

Cause I'm not like everybody else I see you singing, what are you? I'm not like everybody else