The Nick DiPaolo Show - Trump Takes Out The Trash | Nick Di Paolo Show #1647

Episode Date: October 31, 2024

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about the Dodger riots, Harris harrased, Trump forgives Joe and more! Support the show and check out Kalshi. The first 500 traders who deposit $100 get a free $20 credit at https://www.kalshi.com/DIPAOLO Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://Nickdip.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! SEE NICK LIVE: 11/9/24 – Bridge View Center Theater – Ottumwa, IA 2/20/2025 -- Bricktown Comedy Club – Tulsa, OK TIX:  https://www.nickdip.com/tour  For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com 

Music playing Wow! So It's me! If I could do a good Trump I would have. I'm breaking shit. Get out of the way. He's going to win. If he doesn't, I mean, get your muskets ready. Happy Halloween, boys and girls. gonna win if he doesn't I mean get your muskets are ready happy Halloween boys and girls all right and again happy Halloween to you from the most haunted

city in the country Savannah Georgia people have mannequins in their windows year-round and shit it's really creepy down here okay civil war people buried under your house and stuff like that. I got a metal detector I found a couple of fucking bottle caps sitting on a treasure down here. Of course I bought it at a dollar store. It didn't really. Anyways I love Halloween because the bad neighborhoods the the black people, and this isn't racist, the black lady having laughed so hard, they come down my street which is pretty damn white and I heard somebody, oh she said to me, yeah, she goes, white people come to our neighborhood

to buy drugs, we come here to your neighborhood for free candy. She said it, not me. In your politically correct world I get in trouble for saying that. I'm just saying. It was a great line. Anyways, alright, let's start the show. I'm not in a fucking mood. Everybody knows you never go full retard.

Oh yeah, except for the people in Los Angeles. In our West Coast Stupid segment tonight opening the show, as you know, you may not know the Yankees were eliminated from the World Series last night. The Los Angeles Dodgers, when I don't know, I'm gonna guess their eighth championship, I don't know, doesn't matter. They are world champions. They took out the Yankees four games to one. The Yankees were up five-nothing last night and then they turned it to the Bad News bears on the fifth innings and made three errors in a row and just the gates opened and it was very sad but I'm from Boston so my erection was rock hard.

Los Angeles descended into a chaos Wednesday night as belligerent baseball fans of course set a bus on fire while others clashed with cops and looters ran amok following the Dodgers World Series victory. The LA Police Department shared footage of a mob of looters running, of course they get the guy with the mask on, the white man, running in and out of a boarded up Nike store carrying merchandise and throwing it into a car parked outside the store. How is this different than a Tuesday in July? It's not. About four miles from Dodgers, any excuse to steal shit. About four miles from Dodgers Stadium, just after 11 p.m.

The LAPD said it was aware of the looting, but they were probably too busy trying to fix the election, whatever, and has made arrests, but did not disclose how many suspects were taken in. Why? What's all the secret? what's all the secrets about put their names up ducks them the department you know why they don't want to share it because they're

not going to arrest any of them the department also shared that several businesses were looted and multiple properties were vandalized during the violent celebrations across the state but they're not going to destroy and riot after Trump wins right they do this when something good happens. What are they going to do when Hitler is announced the winner? The LAPD said a hostile crowd estimated between two and three hundred people lit an MAT bus on fire about a mile from Dodger Stadium around 1230 a.m. local time. There's the bus.

There's the cretins on top of it. Footage posted to Citizen captured the moment a massive crowd, the majority of whom were wearing Dodger's jerseys and apparel, surrounded and sat atop the graffiti-laced bus. A video posted by atfilmthepolice.la shows fireworks being set off inside the bus as the crowd shouts in stupid excitement. Here you fucking go. That was a normal good bus. Or maybe it was graffiti. Who knows? It's certainly an operating bus that they just...

Mmm. Show it burning. There you go. You gotta grow up. You're not a kid anymore. You gotta grow up. All a reason to fucking loot and steal sneakers and shit. Like I said, anyway. Another showed the bus fully engulfed in flames and spewing out thick black smoke while police and riot garrison set up a perimeter so they could watch too to keep back the crowd instead of shooting fucking rubber bullets and bean bags and fire

hoses. No, just sit back and let them do what they do. Fuck this. Anyways, the bus then appeared to explode and shot flames into the air like Joe Biden's ass up for a can of baked beans. LAPD is currently on tactical alert and has activated a strategic plan to protect communities and businesses, which includes proactive deployment and a coordinated strategy with regional partners to ensure that all Angelins are able to celebrate safely. Los Angeles Mayor Karen, stupid, I do nothing, Bass warned. Anybody see the downfall of this country and why? It's right in front

of you. What? Yeah, you fucking heard me. So yeah, nice going LA. Can't wait for the can't wait for the election not to go your way. That'd be great. You're the most stupid fucks, you people who are on the left. Again, not everybody in LA votes, you know, Democrat, just 99.9% of them and have for 60 years. And that's why your country, your, your, I should call it a country. The state's a third world shithole vice president kamala harris was called a war criminal uh but we're moving on can look at this picture this is so hilarious it's an optical illusion because you can't see her elbow

but it really looks like uh one of those babies what do they call them back in the 60s when the woman took drugs, full of lymphocyte or whatever the fuck. Primi. What? A Primi. Not a Primi. There was a drug women would take and the doctors would give them, ended up fucking, babies were having claw hands and shit. It was great. Doesn't that look weird? Anyways, Kamala Harris is called a war criminal by protest

of blowing a whistle Wednesday as her third campaign event in under 24 hours was disrupted by anti-Israel activists. Harris, 60 years old, not sure why that's relevant, at one point reprimanded activists opposed to Israel's invasion of the Gaza Strip telling them Inquotes right now. I'm speaking as her afternoon rally in Harrisburg PA went off the fucking rails like anything She touches here. She is being heckled We are six days out of an election we are six days out of an election. We are six days away from an election.

That's better. And yours is about a fight for democracy and your right... Look at the fuck... I'm more disgusted with the idiots behind her. You fucking morons. I believe in genocide now. ...the line in this election. Look at those idiots. That is what is on the line in this election. Look everybody has a right to be heard but right now I am speaking.

Oh she stood up for what again it's not her it's the people behind her make me more angry. Every one of yous is a low IQ I don't care long as my team wins voter. That's what you are you fucker. And this happens at all our campaigns, you know how to speak. What we've got here is failure to communicate. Not long after another protester blew a whistle and shouted in a loud voice, you're a war criminal. Wow. We love our democracy. She says it can be complicated at times like when we pull a coup and put a retarded girl at the top of the ticket who has no fucking idea who couldn't run the lemonade stand. It gets messy. But it's the best system in the world, which she doesn't believe

that. She hates this system. She spent her life dedicated to burning it down, you fucking whore. Earlier in the day during an event in Raleigh, North Carolina, a man interrupted Harris by shouting, Kamala Harris, you have disrespected the Palestinian community. I don't know how that is. Hates Jews. I mean, she does. Hates Jews. The back-to-back interruptions followed havoc wreaked by Gaza protesters at Harris' large

Tuesday night closing appeal to voters at the ellipse in Washington, DC. For several minutes as Harris spoke, a siren noise was blared by unseen activists creating a disconcerting din. I figured it was Trump in a fire truck or some shit. Trump. Oh my god. And what's with these anti-Israeli fucks? They're everywhere. They're not going to go away. What do they want her to do? Oh, it's genocide now that Israel decided to destroy these people whose life is dedicated to destroying Israel

who literally they handed him the Gaza Strip and they fucking dug tunnels and spent billions of dollars that way who want to destroy they don't want a Jew alive on the planet and that's who the left sides with even Kamala but she's not extreme enough for them unbelievable Kamala, but she's not extreme enough for them. They're very confusing. Unbelievable. I mean, you've got Jewish people who are taking the Palestinian side.

What the fuck is going on here? Lobby tire something. Oh, I knew Arafat. Anyways, Kokena. God damn it. I knew I would fight. Anyways, cocaine. God damn it. Hey, let me ask you a question, people. Do you feel like you can predict the future?

Then cash in with Kelcey. Kelcey's the first legal exchange where you can bet on any event, including but not limited to the elections. Kelcey went to court and won legal approval for election betting for the first time in over 100 years. Yes, that's a big deal. Now that's really something to celebrate. You can bet on anything from the presidential election to the Oscar nominations for best

picture, whatever you're into. Chances are you can bet on it I personally um you know I'm gonna throw a few dollars on Trump I'm sure I won't get good odds because I think in every polly smoker but again that we never know do we I'm gonna bet that because I live dangerously and I'd love I'll throw a few bucks on you know what UFC fights which is fun and you can do it all at CalShe. CalShe is already being used by hundreds of thousands of people and has facilitated over 1 billion dollars worth of trades. It's time to get in on the fun

folks it's just like buying stocks the more you buy the more you earn if you are right. So put your money where your mouth is and sign up using my link cal she dot-com slash de paolo the first 500 listeners who deposit $100 will get a free $20 credit that's K a L s h I dot-com slash de paolo or click the link in our show notes and the first 500 traders who deposit $100 will get a free $20 credit. CalGy, you can trade on that. And we thank them for sponsoring the show. A lot of sponsors jumping on board. You know what that means, folks?

A lot of eyes on the show. Yeah, yeah, it do. Should be. I started this in my basement like Edison in 1860. Cocaina. Let's move on to the next story of the Trump tells people to forgive Joe. Boy, Trump, boys, he got his shit together this time. You know, they're like, take a little off the... But he actually, this was was this even surprised me a former president Donald

Trump called it terrible on Tuesday that President Biden referred to his supporters as garbage or as I like to say when I'm in France garbage Trump Trump 78 commented on Biden's remark after being informed about it by Senator Marco Rubio while he was still on stage at Pennsylvania Rally. Here's a little bit of, here's a little bit of footer. I don't like mosquitoes! Never did! God, it's getting worse. Go ahead. So you have, remember Hillary she said deplorable and then she said irredeemable right? But she said deplorable that then she said irredeemable right but

she said deplorable that didn't work out garbage I think is worse right but he doesn't know you have to please forgive him he called us garbage when the fucking smash his fucking face he's talking about everyday Americans who this is Trump talking who love their country and want to dream big again and support, oh no this is Rubio, I'm sorry, and support you Mr. President, Rubio said, and I hope the Harris campaign is about to apologize for what Joe Biden just said, Rubio said. He said we are not garbage, we are patriots, we love America, thank you for running, Rubio told Trump.

And then Trump looked at him and kind of surprised Rubio by saying this. Shut up. Mind your fucking business and shut up. I don't want the caffeine. Can you imagine? And it's true, Joe doesn't, well, he does know what he's saying. He's going right to the grave as an angry old man. I and again you have to say did he did he do it to sabotage because he did it on the same day she was making her big closing statement at the rally he stepped all over her message so people are going you know they hate each other

right now was that intentional or whatever the fuck if it was it's the smartest thing that shit head did in his four and a half years or four years of three and a half Or two plus five equals seven Just a real titmouse Damn it. I didn't put any coffee in my muggage but Again, and then I get up I see this the trumpet McDonald's in the garbage truck Eight not twenty thousand people Madison square garden another seventy five thousand outside it up. I see this the Trump at McDonald's in the garbage truck, 20,000 people, Madison Square Garden,

number 75,000 outside. And you're like, wow, this is really getting one sided. Oh, what was the last poll? What's the big one? Not Quinnipiac. There was another one that had him up by like three or four nationally. But you hear all that and you're like, oh, oh it's still I see the headlines all it's neck and neck in Pennsylvania it's neck and neck what if that's true even if he won and that's true I think we're too far gone the fact that that many of you which I don't think it is true are that retarded retarded like I said I want to choke her but the support is behind her. They're just blind. Just fucking blind. So Tony Hinchcliffe, that comedian, boy is he getting some mileage out of that. And I love the fact that Tony, who I, like I said, I just met a few weeks

ago, didn't apologize. I've been waiting for that forever. And the other thing I was reading, Puerto Rico actually has a problem with garbage. That was part of the joke. He wasn't just calling them garbage, you know, but we don't want that to leak in, you know. Even Puerto Ricans online are like, what's the big fucking, you know. But that's what scares me folks. I make people laugh for a living. I have a 36 year, sure it's debatable, but I do sometimes.

And I chose this way to make a living because when people are having a good time, this is universal, anywhere on the, when people are having a good time, what are they usually doing? Laughing the left is not about that. They want to suck the fun out of fucking life I'm reminded of again last night watch the World Series they have to have in the third inning stand up for cancer The Bruins I'm watching the Bruins the other night before the game they bring a kid out

who's going through chemo. And again, folks, I know 80% of you are going to go, well, what the fuck, you're against kids, but don't be so simple. There's a place and a time for fucking everything. But this is a tenant of liberalism. They have never had a good day in their fucking life because they're virtue signaling around the clock That's all this is it's way to make adults go look at I care and you don't that's all that is People go to hockey games baseball and you've heard me say before

Football games to get away from life to get away from fam a hunger and war AIDS disease to get away from that shit. Can imagine you're there with your little kid at a fucking World Series game? And they fucking, you know... Nah, let's remind little Billy that his mother died of breast cancer. What the fuck? Pick a time and a place, I'll send you money. And I know that's gonna sound weird to a lot of people, that's because you're just stupid. Fuck!

Bruins, Boston is trying to become San Francisco East. They already have nothing but virtue signaling. Look, I do comics come home. That's a cancer benefit. Cam Nehle organized and Dennis Leary. Cam's parents died of cancer. I understand that. So we have a separate night where people come out and watch comedians and raise a ton of money you don't have to spill it into everything give people a fucking break but again that is a common characteristic of fucking liberal people because like I said that's all they do is virtue say it makes them feel good it's anyways a lot of coffee you notice at the house. Anyways, for those of you guys on Mug Club right now, stick around for the second half of the show.

The rest of you, I gotta say bye-bye to you, unless you go to nickdip.com, that's my website. Sign up for Mug Club, and if you do that, you'll get the entire Nick DePaulo Show. Even better, the great Steven Crowder show who has Alex Jones and a lot of famous people, especially this next coming week, I'll be out there with them. Famous people, he's got people on the ground everywhere, he's going to get a ton of viewers. I bet you it's a larger streaming thing. So you can get that and a lot more. Also, click on the tour button if you want to. As you see, what is this, next week or week? Is this? Don't tell me that. November 9th, Bridgeview Center Theater in Atomwa, Iowa. And I don't take

that wrong, Atomwa. I've never been there, so I'm looking forward to that. I just, the airport's in the, you know how you stand. Also, I'll be doing the, I'm still, I'll be doing the Brooktown Comedy Club, but it's actually made of wood. I don't understand No, I'm kidding Bricktown Comedy Club in Tulsa, Oklahoma February 20th. I'll see you guys out there second half of the show We're gonna show Trump pulling that great stunt after Joe made their garbage garbage thing I don't know who came up with these I perfect also there's a guy whose father died and you won't believe what he was doing with the body it involves popsicles that's all I'm gonna say hi good night everybody I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall

I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall

I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be the one to fall I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man Thanks for watching!