The Nick DiPaolo Show - Trump Trashes Norah O'Donnell | The Nick Di Paolo Show #1887

Episode Date: April 28, 2026

In today's episode, Nick talks about The White House Correspondents Dinner Shooting, The Shooter, The Lapse In Security, The Left's Hateful Reaction, Cocaine & The Jets and a Perfect Example of FAFO! The FULL SHOW is live streaming & FREE-ONLY on Rumble! Join our LIVE CHAT at 6pm ET every Mon-Thu or watch the FULL EPISODE anytime on demand after 7pm ET. Follow my Channel and get notified! https://rumble.com/c/TheNickDiPaoloShow GET TOUR DATES & TICKETS - https://www.nickdip.com/tour MERCH - Grab some mugs, hats, hoodies, shirts, stickers etc… https://shop.nickdip.com/ PERSONAL VIDEO FROM ME – Send someone a personal video from me! Go to https://shoutout.us/nickdipaolo  or www.cameo.com/nickdipaolo SOCIALS/COMEDY- Follow me on Socials or Stream some of my Comedy!  https://nickdipaolo.komi.io/

really make me laugh. Welcome to the live lineup, ladies and gentlemen, where it's free shows all day. And if you want to watch ad free, just join Rumble Premium. It's that easy. Don't forget to follow my channel and download the Rumble app. Today I'll be talking about, obviously, I haven't seen you guys since the crazy weekend. So I'll be going over. Maybe some stuff you already saw, but it doesn't matter. It's still shocking. White House correspondent shooting, obviously. We'll talk about the lapse in security and obviously the hateful reaction from the left. Just, you know, and it's easy as one, two, three, why this keeps happening. And I think the left is already in the civil war. The right doesn't realize it yet. That's how I feel.

I mean, when you're trying to kill the head of the military, which commander in chief, sounds like a war to me. You're trying to kill the You know what I'm saying? Also, the New York Jets They have a lot wrong with it, but they do some stuff, right? We had a coach that did cocaine apparently when he was a head coach. Rad it out by your...

What's that? Wouldn't you if you were coaching for the Jets? No, I'd be doing fucking heroin. Something way stronger than Coke. Are you kidding me? I would be asking for Propheaval by the second quarter. Doc, put me out.

I can't believe we just threw our third interception and a minute into the game. Also, a very, it should have been the clip of the week, the video of the day, whatever, but some drunk guy grabbed a girl's ass and the husband was right there. Boy, one of my favorite clips. And then at the end of the show, we'll show,

I got a new favorite comedy duo. It will be fucking Woody Harrelson and Bill Maher. Obviously, they both love their reefer and booze. So we got clips of them. We shot him last week talking about some shit, too. They're kind of entertainment. Bill Maher's slurring his words in this one. It's fucking great.

Don't make me like you. Yeah, so what do I talk about first? I have my teeth kind of knocked out with a street hockey stick when I was a young fellow and have four things here that now and then pop the fuck out, had work done. As you know, earlier this year, I had these. terrible toothache in the back, so they yanked that, so they made me a thing that I push in here. That's separate from the three things that are connected

here. These things here, I don't mind back here. I don't even have my thing, and you can't really see what I'm talking. But yeah, come on. I know I live in Georgia, but I don't want to win the fucking Mr. Georgia contest. You know, missing front tooth and the two next to it. I made those goddamn sticky

spicy Korean wings. And I'm telling you folks, you know I can cook pretty good for a fucking idiot. And I have a thousand things that I can make that are very good. This one is at the top right now. Those wings, I swear to God,

I was going to say, I'm thinking about quitting comedy, I think I already did. I'm going to get a goddamn truck and sell these at Forsyth Park, but then that draws a bad element and chicken, you know. What? Well, you know, there's a lot of farmers.

They like chicken. They wear bandanas down here, the farmers, and talk jive. Jive. Black hoodies. Black hoodies. Have you seen the eggs at Publix? Black hoodies, eggs? Yeah.

So, yeah, all kinds of. So I was in a dentist chair yesterday from two to five with nothing really being done other than x-raying my skull. from 19 different angles. It is unbelievable the technology. I'm looking at, and they've got a flat screen TV the size of one you've seen fucking buffalo wings.

It's huge with like four different pictures on it. I'm looking at my skull. Like what it's going to look like when I'm the casket after a few years. I'm looking at my skull. And I don't mean black and white x-ray. It's kind of brownish. It looks dirty.

It's crazy. And then he goes, yeah, I'm like, this is, he goes, yeah, you think that's amazing. He turns it. Now I'm looking into my head, and there's nothing in there. And which didn't surprise a lot of people. But obviously the, whatever, the scan thing doesn't pick up the brain matter. It just picks up the bone. And they're looking at my spinal cord.

I go, what the fuck? You know? So I said the cute nurse, I go, Diane, get in here. We're going to do my dick next. She went like this There's nothing in there It's nothing in there No I said that's the other head

What's the matter with you? What's the matter with you? So anyways They take the three teeth That fell out It's a partial they call it You know, it's a thing Three teeth together

Made from my teeth a mold And it goes back in That's what was in the chicken wing When I both bit the chicken wing So That thing was in in there dangling anyways because when he put it in there was very little bone left to put it on so we were sort of a this thing lasted longer than we thought it was going to went three years

but the bad part is when it came out this time it took even more of what bone was there so now there's a little nub and he puts us back and he's like be you know I know this isn't gonna I can just see it landing in somebody's margarita at the punchline in Atlanta You know what I mean? Because it came out before and I just So this is supposed to be very temporary And they went over 19 options By the end of it I was so confused

It was like they were talking It was like a woman listening to Vince Lombardi explaining How do you know Break down a 3, 4 deep It was so over my head And they had something that had metal on it It goes in here You don't see the metal

That'll take a few weeks and then there's another guy right here in Savannah who won all kinds of awards. The guy that I'm going to is a dentist. The people you want to do implants, dentists do them, but they're not the specialty. The specialty, the periodontists, they're gum and bone doctors. They do implants. In other words, they put the pole in there and let the bone grow around it and all the But this guy

this guy that I found in the magazine here in Savannah's got all kinds of awards and he says he can have you in and out of there in a few days as opposed to my dentist who's a dentist who's great by the way. I don't want to hurt this guy's feelings because I love him and the woman that works with them, they're great. But I'm just

saying if I'm going to be on stage telling fucking jokes or whatever doing a podcast the rest of my life, I've got to have my choppers. I mean I could come out with you know, the Gomer thing. But come on. The fuck, it's hard enough.

I'm 111. Anyways, so that's the deal. That's where I was. When those came out, it's so funny, I get a little bummed out. My wife cries. Her eyes fill up. The first time it happened when we were living in New York, I was about to do a Gutfeld.

It was called Red Eye back then. It was a Friday night. I'm supposed to do it. It's like four in the afternoon. I bite into a sandwich and they come out. So now I have the same. these like four nubs. I look at my wife. She fucking literally stares at it and then starts, she felt so bad for me. I'm like,

why? I go, I thought you were fucking welling up because you were laughing. That's what I would have done if it was your teeth. That's how different men and women are. So yes, I was when I go, oh fuck, here we go. At this age, honestly, I was thinking of going out. My wife wants to like keep me in. I go, what do you, you think somebody's going to recognize me and somehow you're going to be embarrassed because they're going to know that you married a hill? I don't understand what you're. I was ready to go down to boom. He's missing my choppers. And I'm a very vain guy, even now, but not as vain as I was when I was young. You know what I

mean? I'd fucking stay in the house when I was young. Now, who gives you? What, those 12 bartenders that didn't want to fuck me? I'm going to not want to fuck me more? What do you? Anyways, those are male bartenders, by the way, so that was gay. Anyways, so that's the deal. So that's why I haven't seen you in a while. And I just hope this temporary thing, last night I ate a baked potato. I'm eating everything with a fork. I'm not biting into anything.

And I just don't have faith in that. I got a feeling when I do those three gigs, you guys are going to have a good laugh. Who knows, it could go viral if I swallow it. That's what my wife said when we made that movie. Oh, boy. I think that wins the week, Dallas, right there. Let's go on to the, and again, you guys have seen a lot of these clips already, but what the fuck? I haven't seen you. Maybe you haven't because you guys listen to podcasts when you want to listen to them. So I know you're busy and you actually have lives.

Dinner ruined, first story. U.S. acting attorney General Todd Blanche on Sunday said the gunman who opened fired at the White House Correspondents dinner appears to have targeted President Donald Trump. and officials in his administration. What's this motherless fuck's name? We'll get to that, Uncle Jr. It does appear that he did, in fact, set out to target folks that work of the administration, likely including the president.

Of course, it was the... Blanche told NBC News, Meet the Press, adding that authorities are still investigating the suspect's motive. That's the line that gets me. That's the line that shows me we're super afraid of civil war in this kind of whatever you don't know his motive you didn't know this guy's motive he wrote a manifesto that tells you what his motive was this is where words

mean nothing anymore you don't know his motive Obama said that first by the way of course you don't know his motive did you read the manifesto they say that you know why they say that the press, even this guy that's working with Trump, but I understand the left say it because they don't want to take responsibility. It's on them a thousand percent for dehumanizing the president over and over again for the last 15 fucking years to the point where idiots like this, and they know they're out there, you know, eventually will act. And they know that. They fucking know that. So I don't know what this guy is. Don't know their motive. The man taken into custody and connector in the shooting has not been identified officially by authorities.

Oh, this is, okay, but a senior, this was again right after, this was on Sunday the next day. A senior enforcement official with the investigating told USA today on Sunday that he is Cole Thomas, you guys all know this now, 31 years old, Cole Thomas Allen, excuse me, of Torrance, California. The person spoke on the condition of anonymity to discuss the anonymity. I can never say the ongoing investigation. Another federal law enforcement official briefed on the probe. told USA today that FBI executed a search warrant at a home linked to Allen in Torrance, a Los Angeles suburb. Officials say the suspected shooter armed with multiple guns and knives.

What are you going to do with knives? Cut the steak after you kill everybody? Hey, charged a security checkpoint at the Washington Hilton where Reagan was shot by the before gunshots rang out, sending the glamorous event into chaos. Trump along with the First Lady and top cabinet officials was quickly whisked away. We'll show you that clip in a second. One secret service agent was shot but was saved by his bulletproof vest. Here is Todd Blanche talking.

I think this was the day after. Or that night, he's still in a tuxedo. The very worst and the very best of this country. You saw the very worst by the actions of that coward that the president just talked about. But you also saw the very... When he said they're very worst, I thought you're talking about all the press that was there. That's exactly what I thought you meant.

But go ahead. I'd hang out with this guy before I'd hang out with Rachel Maddo. Exactly what they're supposed to do. And you'll see the videos come out, I expect, very shortly. And you'll see law enforcement do exactly what we want them to do. And so I echo what President Trump just said that we are extraordinarily grateful and appreciative of the men and women of law enforcement. Trump looks bored with it all. They did their jobs tonight, including one who was...

who was injured. This investigation is ongoing. I expect you will see charges filed shortly. The charges should be self-evident, given the conduct. But as you'll hear, there will be multiple charges around the shooting, around the possession of firearms and anything else that we can get on this guy. How about attempted murder? The investigation is obviously ongoing and just started.

There is federal law enforcement already working on search warrants and doing their job. and I don't want to get ahead of them and don't want to get ahead of the work that they're doing even as we speak. Director Patel and I were just on the crime scene a short while ago. I gave you 40 seconds. And everybody in this room should rest. It's all right. I fucked up getting it to him. He's napping.

It's a good show today, folks. Anyways, yeah. Wasn't that weird watching a press conference and three guys in tuxedos? It was something that didn't match. it looks like they were on a roast with Dean Martin and Sammy Davis got shot something happened anyways

okay let's move on so here's the video the first video that you might have seen you might not up like I said I don't know when you guys watch this it's Trump at the table being rushed off and what he said is he heard a bang you can hear it he thought somebody

dropped a tray which I can see it It sounds just like that when you think about it. And yeah, and then I just love how the press shit their pants. Anyways, here it is. Kind of a scary moment. Three trays. Look at this. There you go.

Get out of your tables, you're fucking chicken shit. Look at the press. That's what you want to see, huh? That must have been fucking a little creepy. One guy's still eating. Cheryl Nadler is over there complaining. That's how this all started, I think. Nadler said a steak was cooked wrong.

You got to fight with the chef and all hell broke loose. Okay. That's enough. You don't know at that point. It has to be scary because you don't know, right? It could be 14 Iranians with machine guns. You know, you fucking, folks, don't kid yourself. I don't care how much security you got.

You can't, whatever. here's what goes through my mind. You know how Trump and our military, it's like a video game, we show a building and one of our F-16s or drones just fucking sends from miles away. I mean, I know we must have something protecting the White House, but wouldn't that be the move?

I mean, I know this is a lone dude. And by the way, this guy is a... like, actually scary smart guy. He's a professor and engineering and all kinds of degrees and shit, and he's black. I mean, my jaw hit the floor. What are you saying, Nick? You know what the fuck I'm saying. You know exactly what I'm saying.

The only black engineers I know work for Amtrak. Hercules. Anyways, I'm kidding. I know plenty of black people that of every, smart actually. They all play for the Celtics. Listen, here is the outside video of

the dude running by at this point he hasn't shot yet, or he must already on the way through he's, that's right. Check it out. Why don't they see him coming? This is what I don't understand. This guy's get his head down, like his work and security of marshals.

Got two doorman at the hotel and a lady that was in the pool. I don't get it. I mean, is the guy in a slippers, they couldn't hear him running? I don't, I'm a little perplexed unless he just came around the corner and they didn't have time to react. But when you're, don't get me wrong, but when you're secure, your head should be on a swivel at all times. It's that fucking easy. So I don't get that. And a lot of people questioning security.

Look, I realize it's harder. You know, easier said than done. Anyways, let's get the real important shit. May 7th, if I still have teeth. Punchline Atlanta. That's a week from this Thursday. May 8th, Seoul Joles in Potsdam, PA. Very good crowd, very good people.

May 9th, Rivers Casino in Philly. That should be interesting because if you ask comedians about casino gigs, we're not crazy about it. Because they're usually a bunch of people that go to casino. know, is that don't, they're not into comedy, they're stumble in. Somebody put a ticket on their fucking hotel door. They think I'm Tony Danza. They're like, oh, I remember him.

And they're all drunk and shit. And they get there, they're disappointed that I'm a comic. It's very weird. It is a weird audience. Although I did shoot one of my specials at Foxwoods, but that's because all my fans knew I was shooting. It's a different situation. But I look for, I got a guy that I play football with in college

is already coming out, you know? And I'm like, oh, not to this one. Please. First of all, I haven't done comedy about eight months. It'll be fun. I hope the chopper stay in. Keep your fingers cross. Go to nickdip.com to get tickets before they run out. And while you're there, go to the merchandise page, bedpans, plastic hips. Just selling my head up on the right. It was made by 3D printed, didn't you say that? A what? Nick bust. Yeah, Nick bust. Nick bust.

Also at Nick Dip.com. But yeah, if you want to support the show, hats and hoodies, all that, please do that. It would help. And please come out to these shows because I'm using this as a barometer. I put a lot of money into social media like a lot of people do.

And I just want to take the temperature to see if my money is being spent wisely. And it will decide whether I go on this year or I can, well, I'm going to continue writing this book. you guys are going to fucking, I'm getting excited. I wrote about religion all weekend. I always give you guys a little tidbits. I was talking about how I,

Dallas, you heard me maybe doing it on stage, how, you know, I was in Boston, everybody who's a Catholic, Irish, Roman Catholic, Italian Irish. That's all I grew up around. And everybody who had a crucifix on, the Irish guys that said, you couldn't see this because when they went out to a nightclub on saying, Saturday night. They didn't have their shirt unbutton down to the belly button like Italian guys did.

But I talk about, and it's a true story. I talk about picking a girl up at a bar and in Salem, Mass, and we went up to a beach in Gloucester. That's where she was from. Good Harbor Beach. It's after midnight. It's, you know, it's desolate. And the moon is huge. And I can still see. anything one thing led to another and uh you know all as we have on is our underwear and she's on top of me and um all you know all of a sudden i see jesus go by like on a swing like a willenda brother and it's in my face going back and it was the creepiest and the moon's hitting it and her tits are glowing and anyways and i wrote it dallas i'm going to let you read it i wrote it like you would have thought it was a one of those romance novels that Fabio was on the cover? Because I did. I got really poetic. It was like the moon, the moonlight was dancing off her perky white breasts, which jumped up

because of her dark tan. Her tits looked like two eyes looking through a tinted window of a Mazda bathed in a copse flashlight. I think it's really good. And I wrote about how athletes, you know, use religion, but I'm like, they're not using it as religion. It's a good luck charm. You know, so a guy swing and miss, and I remember this. Crucifix popped. He kisses it three times before the next pitch. Yeah, that's why Jesus died on the cross.

So you could hit one in the gap in the ninth. I think you're going to love it. I'm 78 pages in. That's kind of a lot. I mean, this is a rough draft. Don't get me wrong. a lot of fat will be cut away and shit, but still, I'm enjoying the process way more than I am getting on a plane

and staying in a hotel and looking out the window and looking at strange people at the air. I'm tired of it, guys. I'm sorry. Anyways, let's move on. Oh, personalized video. If you want to send a video of me making funnier friends, go to shoutout.us or say it happy birthday to your sister

who just had, coins removed from our ugly feet. Headline Lapse in security, which is what we were talking about. The executive editor of the Daily Beast said that he stayed in the hotel room next to the alleged White House correspondent's dinner

gunman, 31-year-old Cole Allen, a teacher from Torrance, California. Of course. This is what's teaching people out in California. Can imagine that? Wonder what he's teaching. He called out the layers of failure, he observed,

in the chaotic aftermath. Hugh Dardy, a former editor for the Post, learned he was briefly neighbors with Allen when he attempted to return to his hotel room on the 10th floor of the Washington Hilton after the shooting was stopped by multiple cops. Three hours after the shooting, Dardy was still waiting for passage to his room. In that time, he watched officers linger in the hallway, as they couldn't do anything but wait for a judge to issue a judge. warrant to search Allen's room. It does not take a security expert to unravel the layers of failure that happened at Washington,

D.C. Hotel on Saturday night, D.R.D.R.E. said, and he knows a little bit about this. He highlighted the lack of security at an event, which was attended by upwards of 2,500 people, including President Trump and a majority of his cabinet. But the thing is, folks, all the press was there. All the douchebags. who caused this. I kind of wish Trump stood up and went it's because of you motherfuckers. Attendees and hotel guests

alike were still checking in mere hours before the dinner started, but no one was screening the luggage, he reported. What? You fucking people. Not screening the luggage. You have no idea how to defend a nation.

The stairwells and elevators were also unmanned during the dinner, he said. Okay, boy. Did they clean house with secret security? Maybe not. Noting that he moved up and down from floor 10 all day without ever showing his ID to anyone other than a clerk. Officials suspected early on that the gunman gained access

to the hotel by paying for a room. Well, brilliant. Alan was found with a cashier of weapons on his person, including a shotgun, a pistol, and several knives. He sounds like De Niro in that movie The Fan. Do you ever see that one, Dallas? Oh, dude. He's a San Francisco Giants fan.

You'll like it because you're a National League guy. He's a huge San Francisco Giants fan. And Barry Barnes, he has a beep with, he's one of these guys that calls into radio shows and shit. It's De Niro playing a fucking nutback. And Bobby Bond, I think was Barry Barnes in it? Yeah. He played himself, didn't he?

I can't even remember. I think he did. But yeah, he fucking stalks Barry Bonds. And I'm just bringing up because he, for a living, De Niro was a cutlery guy. So he had all kinds of knives. I'm telling you, it was pretty fucking good. Anyways, let's talk about the Maniac's Manifesto, this guy, Cole, Cole Allen. He sent an anti-President Trump manifesto to his family members about 10 minutes,

family members, about 10 minutes before opening fire at Saturday night's dinner, calling himself the, this is his nickname for himself, the friendly federal assassin. I don't know. Assassin sort of canceled health friendly. And revealing he was trying to kill Trump

administration officials. Turning the other cheek, this is, I'm quoting the nutbag here. Here you see him wrapped in a hot dog thing. This is how he made his living before as yeah at parties he'd dress up like a hot dog at Fenway and turning the other cheek he says i'm quoting his manifesto is for when you yourself are oppressed i'm not the person raped in a detention camp i'm not the fisherman executed without trial i'm not sure who the fuck i'm i'm sure he's talking about

minneapolis right uh the fisher thing he's talking about the drug boats getting blown out oh yes i'm sorry well done Alan wrote in the document, which a relative, yeah, they were fishermen. Here's a guy who's got an IQ through the roof, probably on the borderline, you know, autistic slash cuckoo, bucking, you know how it is. You got to have just enough autism in you. You have too much. It's like booze, you know what I mean? Have five or six drinks, but when you get up to 12, 13.

Anyways, Alan wrote in the document, which a relative provided to police, I'm not a school kid blown up or a, child star that's gaza strip talk or a teenage girl abused by the many criminals in the do you see how these this manifesto reads just like i gave this to gutful last night so i don't think i stole it um it reads just like uh bullet points for the view or or a maddow show do you see do you see the connection and they're still denying the left so again we're in a war the right but wake up. Turn in the other cheek when someone else is oppressed is not Christian behavior. It is complicity in the oppressors' crimes.

Okay. Fucking nuts, bag. You're half black. You got a dangerous bi-racial black-white combo. You got the white brains, too much of them. And you got the instincts of a black dude who gets a little mad and he grabs a gun. again, not all black people, not all of them, just 94%. I'm kidding, you know that colored folk.

Alan described his targets as including administration officials, not including FBI Director Cash Patel. Now, my mind went to, oh, because he's brown. That was where I went, but it's not. He says in the thing that he wouldn't shoot law enforcement. So that might have been why cash was in there. Or my theory. They are targets prioritized from highest ranking to lowest.

Now right there, like the brilliant point I made earlier, if you're going from highest to lowest, Trump would be commander-in-chief. Am I right? You'd start there, then work your way. I am no longer, I'm still, this is his manifesto, I am no longer willing to permit a pedophile. Here you go.

Right out of, this could be out of Hakeem Jeffries. head of the Democrats in the Senate. This could be him talking. I am no longer willing to permit a pedophile rapist and traitor to coat my hands with his crimes, Alan wrote, apparently referring to the president. There's something wrong with the black man mine.

There's something wrong with it mine. Which president, Clinton? Because he's the actual pedophile rapist. Yes, exactly. But see how they are? even when they're bright. The point is, if you can radicalize a guy like this,

I mean, there's a lot of people who have way lower IQ and are way more violent. I mean, this is probably his first incident. It's a biggie. Don't get me wrong. In order to minimize casualties, I will also be using buckshot rather than slugs. Well, thank you.

A murderer with a conscience. He says, in parentheses, less penetration through the walls. I would still go through most everyone here to get to the targets if it were absolutely necessary. Everyone here, does that mean the press? That would have been a blessing. On the basis that most people chose to attend a speech by a pedophile, rapist, and traitor, and are thus complicit.

Do you see, folks, you have to be retarded to not to see what's being said about Trump for the last 10, 15 years. as they dehumanized them. Why wouldn't you kill Hitler? Or a threat to democracy, an existential threat. He says, but I really hope it doesn't come to that. Alan mocked the insane lack of security. Okay, so this is the criminal mocking the security at the Washington Hilton saying,

Iranian agents could have brought even more devastating firepower, and no one would have noticed shit, which is kind of true, I guess. Again, it's easier said than done to protect everybody. You know, the hotel where they're staying? Like the one thing I immediately noticed, he said, walking into the hotel is the sense of arrogance. I walk in with multiple weapons and not a single person

that considers the possibility that I could be a threat. Do you know why that is? That's because the left, the same people who have got Trump targeted, been preaching that white people are racist if they ever, question a person of color about anything. Because if you didn't have any, you were just a regular hotel customer, and they questioned you about that, they'd get fired.

That's where that comes from. So it's the opposite of arrogance. The security at the event is all outside, focused on protesters and current arrivals, because apparently no one thought about what happens if someone checks in the day before. Like this level of incompetence is insane, he says, and I very sincerely hope it's corrected

by the time this country gets actually competent leadership again. Oh, you mean like Joe Biden? See what I'm saying? He's obviously not a dumb guy. But what you can do to people? And the fucking left is complicit. The media is the cancer. You have to focus on them even before the Democrats.

Because you take the media away, you don't have a Democrat Party. They wouldn't win an election in a thousand fucking years. But there's enough fucking idiots in this country. I think, again, you know me, I don't even believe some of these elections are real. I swear to God, half the shit's planned out 10 years ago. I don't know. I can't really prove it. But if you read enough books and no, I don't have a tinfoil hat.

Read the shit. Anyhow, that's that. I forget what I was saying. My fucking neck is killing me, too. I swear to God I have, what do you call it? Menangitis. I swear. You know, they told me arthritis, which I saw, you know, that's my spine.

Okay, I can deal with that. But you didn't explain up here, right here. I feel like I have two nails going on it for the last, you know, eight months. Tumor. To tumor. Let's move on to everything that's wrong with the media that we just talked about. Nora O'Johnnell. Wasn't she CBS for a long time?

she was I think she get traded for two yeah two anchor women out of Scranton from AAA they moved up and this douche went over to NBC CBS this is CBS because it's 60 minutes

so Nora O'Donnell good looking lady but is left and as stupid as the rest of them she might as well be 800 pounds of the hair lip once you hear her fucking take on life she sat down at 60 minutes with the president of the United States, and boy, was this fucking fun to watch.

President Trump on Sunday criticized CBS News, Nora O'Donnell, for reading the reported manifesto of the suspected gunman at Saturday's White House dinner, calling the veteran reporter, Trump called her a disgrace. I love this. This is finally once in a while he gets face-to-face, one-on-one with these people. And CBS is as guilty as anybody about shitting on Trump and lying.

And she's their big new acquisition on 60 minutes, I guess. They said, you know, we have to get somebody under 111. And so they got her. And like she's so predictable, pulls out the manifesto because, well, watch. There you go. The so-called manifesto is a stunning thing to read, Mr. President. He appears to reference a motive. In it, he writes this quote, administration officials, they are targets.

And he also wrote this. I am no longer willing to permit a pedophile, rapist, and traitor to coat my hands with his crimes. What's your reaction to that? Well, I was waiting for you to read that because I knew you would because you're horrible people, horrible people. Yeah, he did write that. I'm not a rapist. I didn't rape anybody. I'm not a pedophile.

Do you think he was referring to you? Excuse me. I'm not a pedophile. You read that crap from some sick person. Pause. She goes, oh, you think he was referring to you? Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

The whole world on the left on the Internet, Blue Sky, has inferring to him as a rapist, pedophile, in that order, verbatim, and she pretends not to know that. Right there, to me, that stuck out as what a fucking, what a, if I could use the word, mendacious douchebag. She knows damn well. Oh, you thought that, that, oh, I never thought of that.

It's almost like she's highlighting the fact, right? Am I reading into that? Go ahead. I'm associated with stuff that has nothing to do with me. I was totally exonerated. your friends on the other side of the plate are the ones that were involved with, let's say, Epstein or other things. But I said to myself, you know, I'll do this interview and they'll probably, I read the manifesto. You know, it's a sick person.

But you should be ashamed of yourself reading that because I'm not any of those things. Mr. President, these are the gunman's words. Excuse me. You shouldn't be reading that on 60 minutes. You're a disgrace. But go ahead. let's finish the interview. The other thing that he wrote in the...

You're disgraceful. You stupid fucking blah-a-mouthed! Wasn't that like watching porn? I almost nutted. You're disgraceful. Okay, let's go on with the interview. Then he goes, you're a disgrace again.

Isn't that refreshing to see it, right? It's people like her who will get this guy almost killed. It's that fucking easy, folks. It's that simple. and that Hakeem Jeffries, that's fucking smoke, he's denying it still. I'm doubling down on the words I've been using. Oh, good.

Let me tell you something, people on the left. Let's say you do win the White House in a couple of years. Oh, my God. Again, you've been poking the bear. You've been poking the bear. Let me tell you something. When somebody on the right, and we don't know this because every time there's assassination attempt,

it's you lefties. But when somebody on the right does it, it'll be, first of all, they like guns. So they're not going to pick off an ear or fucking graze your hairline. And you got it coming to you. I wouldn't want to be the next president if a fucking Democrat.

Because, and I'll say this again, where are we going from here? You think we're going to go back to where it was before Trump won his second time? We're going to all be PC and shit and all that woke shit's going to come back? No, it's fucking go time. It will be fucking go time.

The country better pray that the Republicans win for the next 20 years. Because there's nowhere else to go. There is no, you got your own, you created an alternate universe for yourselves. There is nowhere else to go. It's planet against planet now. It's a good fucking show.

I should be more famous than I am. Not you guys. I love you guys. O'Donnell continued. the interview stating the suspected government also wrote social media posts critical of the president and others included anti-Christian rhetoric.

Trump responded asking why O'Donnell didn't outline the comments specifically. You should read. Why don't you read all the anti-Trump stuff is what he's asking her? Why don't you read it? You just did, so why don't you read it? And the interview, Trump said,

he wasn't worried about possible injuries during Saturday's instance. He said, I wasn't worried. I understand life and the yeast infections with pumps like yourself. He didn't say that I did. I thought it was a nice touch. Trump said Sunday, we're living in a crazy world, he said. And then he said this.

Don't you ever try to fuck me? No, he didn't. It's not going to be long before you all kill yourselves because you're all crazy. And you can project it back on me. God, Trump sounded like Trump. I mean, like my boy, Charlie. Okay, and now one more thing, I think, about this. I think we've been a nice job of recapping for people who didn't, you know,

you've got kids and you do shit. My ex-wife, Caroline Leibbitt, says it's to their, she says it to their faces. She was pregnant and all bloated and shit. What happened? Did you have the kid? No. Dallas goes, no, like he's the her OBGYN. No, I got a pie shot of her period in my bedroom.

Yesterday, Caroline Levitt explained to the very people who are partly responsible for the brushes with death that Trump has faced, why they are fucking assholes. Here she is, boy, after watching that little black raggedy Ann doll trying to be Biden speaker, isn't this disrefreshing? and she lays down the law beautifully here. Go ahead, lady. Nobody in recent years has faced more bullets and more violence than President Trump. This political violence stems from a systemic demonization of him and his supporters by commentators,

yes, by elected members of the Democrat Party and even some in the media. This hateful and constant and violent rhetoric directed at President Trump day after day after day for 11 years. has helped legitimize this violence and bring us to this dark moment. Those who constantly falsely label and slander the president as a fascist, as a threat to democracy, and compare him to Hitler to score political points, are fueling this kind of violence. The left-wing cults of hatred against the president, and all of those who support him and work for him, has gotten multiple people hurt and killed, and it almost did so again this weekend. How do you argue with any of that?

Well, because I'm Democrat, and I listen to Morning Joe and Rachel Maddow, they tell the truth. You're in an alternate universe. You're fucking crazy. And they're out there still denying this type of connection. And what kills me is Obama, if you drop the N-word, they would have come to your house and fucking thrown you in prison. If you called them the N-word or whatever to fuck. Remember the rodeo clown? guy was a rodeo clown in San Antonio

he had an Obama mask on and they fucking arrested him that's what kills me the double standards I'm not I'll just Jimmy Camille I didn't pull up I'm sick of fucking talking about that asshole I thought you know I know him when I did the show he was a whole

different guy I don't know what the fuck this guy's thinking he must be on the payroll for the fucking you know the inside machine or whatever the fuck but he did some joke about Melania looking radiant like she's an expecting, what did he say, widower?

An expectant widow. He did that on a show and got in trouble for it. And then he repeated it Monday last night in his monologue. He was talking about it in context or whatever the fuck. And as a comedian, and Trump and Melania want him gone. And look, obviously my first instinct as a stand-up comp, especially me, because I've gotten a lot of fucking trouble. I've been fired from good paying jobs for saying shit.

I defend freedom of speech first. But here's why I'm not going to defend fucking Kimmel because of the double standard. He already did this once and didn't lose his job, right? So as long as this is a double standard, fuck them. I say fire him. Yeah, but you're for free speech when it's for everybody. You don't just fucking cherry pick who can say what.

So fucking can't them. What a douchebag. Imagine joking about fucking Michelle Obama being a fucking expectant widow or whatever. Just think about that. They'd be knocking on your fucking door at home going through your computers and shit. That's what I'm talking about. It's a double standard. So all bets are off.

Fucking hang them. Yucky. Let's lighten up. You know how you're lighting a. heavy show up by talking about the New York Jets. Talk about a little sugar to make the medicine going on. Let's do some sports. Line coach.

Get it? You like that one? I know you'd love it. Line coach. Ex-N-Fel star running back, Leveon Bell, made quite the... I don't like that a brother ran it out. You know why he ran it out? Because the coach is white.

He would have never rat... Right? If that's Herm Edwards, or pick a black coach, fucking Tomlinson. Are you going to rat him out? No. Levyon Bell made quite the accusation against his former head coach with the New York Jets, Adam Gase. Gase, now the past game coordinator under Jim Harbaugh with the Los Angeles

charges, didn't fare well in New York, owning a 9 and 23 record before being fired after the 2020 season. You can thank Tom Brady for a lot of those. Bell and Gase both joined the team. I don't even remember Bell with the Jets in 2019 when they went 7 and 9. that's actually a great year for them, but flamed out the next year. Bell made an appearance on the Respectfully podcast with Justin LaBoy, where he blasted Gase, calling him the dumbest coach ever.

But that wasn't the worst that was said. Bell accused Gase, again, the former head coach of the Jets, abusing cocaine in his office. Unlike the guys he hangs out with who drink mint juleps. Get out of here. Leboy. asked Bell to go further after he said, Gase did a lot of shit in that office that coaches ain't supposed to be doing. Then Bell said Gase was using white girl as a slang term for cocaine,

and then it did a snorting gesture. Just say it. Don't be a pussy. Say blow. Say, yeah, yo. White girl? What the fuck is that? That's racist shit, man.

Right? When I'm doing fucking COVID. in the bathroom in a comedy club. I don't know. Say, give me some Letitia. Fuck a Taniqua. You got a couple of, I got a eight ball of Tanikua up in this mother back.

I'm like, bro, I ain't. And these are exact quotes, by the way. That I love. I'm surprised the press that so left wing doesn't correct the grammar. I ain't just walk in the office

and see my coach, snort and cocaine. I ain't. I'll repeat that. I ain't just walk in. What he means is I didn't just walk in. But he knows. Here's my theory on that too.

They know how to talk. They're not that fucking ignorant. But every fiber of their being is to fight against or sound like or act like Whitey. Every. And fucking Zuck called that. I've said this on the show before. Zuck was a cop and dealt with a ton of the shit. He was with me in New York.

he was in our car I had a set at the comedy seller who was staying with me I said come the comedy cell with me we drive around looking for a parking spot in Washington Square Park and the light is fucking green here comes a black dude bandana on ass crack hanging out couldn't have been moving slower and I go why the fuck do they always do that cross against the like he goes oh first of all because you don't second of all he goes every fiber of their being is a protest against the establishment of fucking, I couldn't think of a better fucking, remember that, kids.

Love you, Zook, miss you, fucking recliner, sit next to me that I bought for you, empty. Fucking look over it every time. I get pictures, more pictures of him than my wife. Anyways, I don't, honey. That's a lie, you know that. Did I tell you I signed my wife?

I think I mentioned that. I had to. I thought it was one of the funniest things I ever did. She has a beautiful black and white picture, wedding picture of me and her in a frame with glass on it. And I signed it like it was a fucking headshot. I was nervous. I thought I was going to get my ass chew out. She fucking laughed her ass off.

Good to be back at the hut. Anyways. I'm like, bro, I ain't just walk in the office and see my coach. Again, Bell explained till the boy, we're about to go to practice, bro. We got practice in 28 minutes. We got walkthrough, bro. You can't be walking when you're on. Coke, you'd be running. No, this is what you're doing in here? Bell doubled down saying he saw

Gase do it himself. It wasn't, did he say it to the coach or this is what he wanted to say? It's fucking bullshit. It wasn't just one time. That's what it did, though. What? Everybody knows that. That's what he did. But it was just crazy to me to actually see him doing it. I heard all the stories and shit, which is probably true, but I'm just saying it's very surprising you'd write out your coach. then again it was a while ago and you're black he's way. Since being fired by the Jets, Gase wasn't on any coaching staff in the NFL, rather consulting from time to time.

His father-in-law, Joe Vitt, works as a defensive assistant for the Broncos, who he visited during the 2023 and 2025 offseason to provide insight and an eight ball. La, la, la. La, la. Oh, this thing is aching like a motherfucker. These people might come out just to see my teeth fly out when I'm on stage.

That might be a draw. You know? I got to go to this other dentist who sounds like a miracle worker. It's going to be minimum 15. 15K. And I don't even, it's not like I'm on the dating scene. Why am I doing it? Let them all fall out.

He hasn't made an appearance in a while. Hey, let's move on to the final story tonight that probably could have gone under the title of video of the day. but we save those for the silly shit. This one, boy. Fapo, or FAPO, or FAPO. FAPO. FAPO. FAPO. A resurfaced, it's about a year old, but it just resurfaced. This is camera footage from a bar security camera.

Video of a man throwing a savage haymaker at a drunken barfly who groped his wife while playing pool has gone viral, sparking a debate about whether his use of force was appropriate. As the husband racks the balls, his wife at the other end of the table is approached by a clearly intoxicated man in a red polo shirt and torn jeans who appears to grab the woman's rare end before she shoes him away.

Now, this guy's so fucking drunken shit, right, that he doesn't even notice the husband. you know, at this end. No, he didn't even look that way. You know, damn well. And he's blasted. He's fucking blasted. And it's kind of typical behavior if you didn't think she was with anybody.

You know, not typical. I'm saying. Retro. Typical in 1980. Whatever the fuck. But anyway, so he's going to, we'll watch this and watch the husband. And I'll give you my. This is how they make the headlines.

So I click on it, though. Fearse debate between whether the guys. was right or not and uh let's take a look shall we watch the guy in the red shirt come over and grab the woman it's kind of look at him look at him his shirt's up he pulls it down he's all fucked up look at oh no my god oh my god let's see that again Dallas please it's like the Kennedy assassination only funner watch how watch his hand like he's Joe cool what's the hand gesture he does right here Oh, good Lord. And here's the owner or whoever.

Get out of my face, man. I feel like that's me at B&D without even hitting anybody. Fucking waitress didn't serve me for 55 minutes, so I yelled at her and they fucking get my face. Wow. The video has drawn a range of opinions online because we live in a pussy country. And, no, I'll give you my take.

It's not as cut and dried as a haymaker against... These are some comments online. First of all, the first comments are saying the guy was wrong. A haymaker against the guy, the guy who threw the punch is wrong. A haymaker against an inebriated opponent of much smaller stature. Nope.

You confront the guy, you make him apologize, and you tell him to go home and sober up after he does. This is a low-tie behavior. No, it isn't. First of all, that's the last thing it is. Yeah, exactly. When guys do roids, which would be high test, a high tea. I'm not saying he was, but I'm just saying, how's that low tea?

Oh, because he was in, shut the fuck up. That's high tea, if anything. Then the next person says, this is how you end up in jail. Something just aren't worth it, opined another. Yeah, but you don't know that. When you throw in the punch, you don't think you're going to fucking, guy's going to fall and crack as you know what I mean? The dude, here we go, and this was from a woman, the dude is very insecure.

What if the other dude was bigger and stronger and sober, a woman asked? That's a sick question, you're a sick fucking. I'm not that sick that I'm going to answer it. There are also plenty of comment. First of all, about what if he was sober and bigger? That doesn't fucking matter. See, I don't think a woman could last 30 seconds at a man's head, especially when somebody

describes your wife's ass or your girlfriend's ass or it doesn't matter who the fuck. It could be Lufoirigna. If you don't fucking... Now, I'm not saying it, look, it seems like this last few generations, it's always sucker punches. It's usually black guys.

I get sucker punch by that fucking bra. If that was a guy, I would have been knocked out like that. I swear to God. I mean, you saw she fucking caught me. I was in a had no idea she was even in the room. So, but you don't do it. You don't, guys look down. He's, he's his wife's ass getting grabbed.

He doesn't have five minutes ago. He's smaller than me. He's really drunk. That's not how it works. You go, you mother, and you lose your shit. You know, you don't, now, the guy that said you can go over and, and make him apologize, that's an option, I guess. But it's not going to be the first one.

Well, and even with that, you can still get physical shove him off. I'm not, no, I agree with that, too. My point, though, is I'm still going to get physical. Of course. Of course. And you could have given him, but you don't know how drunk he is. You don't know if he has a knife on him. I'm just saying.

That's my take anyways. I don't know. And then people are going, a lot of commenters thought the hubby was justified in defending his wife's unwanted contact from a stranger. And I like this one. This is a guy who's probably been in a few bar flights. And since when does a guy grabbing a woman's ass out of the blue not rate as a fist to the jaw? Well put.

Again, yes, you're not, you people that are commenting, you're doing Monday morning quarterback. Like, you should have talked to him and blah, blah. And what if the guy who threw the punch has got a couple in him? There goes all logic. And I agree with the guy who says, that was a solid hit. Guess he'll think twice before grabbing a woman. again. And then this guy goes, this is how a man handles business. This drunk idiot learned the hard way, said another commentator who felt the lush gut what he deserved.

And another guy said how he could have died and this guy could have went to, which is true also. We had a woman on this show, and I still, we text once in a while, whose son, his son was at a wedding in Queens, New York. She's from down here somewhere. I forget. South Carolina sorry if I'm getting her wrong. North Carolina. Young son in his 20s at a wedding in Queens comes out after the reception

late at night, New York in Queens, and looking for his Uber. And he taps on some guy's car thinking it was his Uber or his ride. Black dude gets out. He's an assistant coach at Wake Forest basketball. One punch,

knocks him out, hits his head, he dies. So we had her on the show And they were trying to knock down the charges And so yes That is always a possibility But don't Monday morning quarterback And go, well, he was smaller And blah blah

Smaller guys are the ones you get to look out for Look at me, I'm tiny Anyways, that's that But that's the It is I don't know how that guy didn't die Let's put it that way. I mean, he went nine nights.

And his head hit that friggin. And the thing kept running, and they were trying to, and he wasn't, I saw, we have to Google that. Who knows? Well, that's it. Boys and Girls for today. Don't forget cameo.com. If you want to send a personalized video from me to a friend maybe roasting him or whatever,

making fun of your dad or your uncle, go to cameo.com. You guys think that I will say it. You're very welcome. We will see you back here at the same time tomorrow. Take care. Have a good day. Hi. Good night, everybody.