The Nick DiPaolo Show - Vlad Gone Mad | Nick Di Paolo Show #670

Episode Date: March 2, 2022

Putin going mad. State of the Union. Pelosi thinks we're dumb. Making it a race issue where none exists. Greg Zuk: In Memoriam.

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we? Mad Vlad. It's horrible what's going on. And you guys know it. I know it. Putin has lost his mind. Like I said to my wife, this is creepy. We know Biden's already lost his mind. Did I say this on the show the other day? Now we get another

cuckoo. Both of them with their fingers on the biggest buttons. What the fuck? Turning into a little bit of a nightmare. Anyways, Russia said it was ready Wednesday for the second round of peace talks with Ukraine. Why would we believe anything? While giving a chilling warning that a third world war would certainly involve nuclear weapons. Really?

Well, whose fault is that? That's reassuring, isn't it? You got a guy in the late stages of fucking dementia, and you got this guy who probably got syphilis from a figure skater or a gymnast. He's got good taste, I'll tell you that. And he's been isolated, they said, because of COVID. And, you know, he's inside his own head. That's kind of creepy.

At least that's what they think people close to him are saying. The invading nation's delegation will be placed to await Ukrainian negotiators, Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Pezkov said, as Russian forces continue the devastating air and land assault for the seventh day. Video footage showed yet another series of brutal bomb blasts Wednesday, as Russian forces also claimed to have taken control of the area around Ukraine's largest nuclear power plant. That's in Zabritia. Hey, not bad. Something like that.

Check out some. These are devastating. These aren't fucking cherry bombs. Jesus Christ. Can you imagine? Is that Lucy? Okay. Those were small mushrooms.

They were using those vacuum bombs. They were using... What else were they using? Thermal... Yeah. Creepy. They were using those vacuum bombs. They were using, what else were they using? Thermo. Yeah, creepy. That's not just to knock down a few buildings. Already more than 2,000 Ukrainian civilians have been killed. I bet you it's higher than that.

The country's emergency service said, as the number of people fleeing could reach 1 million within hours, as the UN Refugee Agency warned, which is what a horror show. I mean, I mean, you're blowing up civilians, you piece of shit. I know, I guess all's fair in love and war, whatever the fuck they say in war. What exactly leads you to believe the Soviets were involved? Because that's where he lives in his mind, the Soviet Union. Because that's where he lives in his mind. The Soviet Union.

He sees Ukraine as Russia, man. And we disrespected Russia. We carved up the fucking after 1991. And Putin was having none of it all this time. Yet we showed a clip of him singing Blueberry Hill. Did you ever see that? Did I show you that? Ukrainian Foreign Minister Dmytro Kuleba. God damn it, can't wait for this war to end.

Can't we get something? No, I was going to say here. Later confirmed his nation's delegation will be at the peace talks Wednesday, even after President Vladimir Zelensky had said Russia must first stop bombing people for the talks to continue. How about this guy? Don't ever underestimate us stand-up comedians. We can do anything, almost. This fucking guy, now he's the sexiest man alive on the Internet, which actually gives me some hope about women because he's not like a fucking model,

but he sure is. They're taking in his courage. He's a man, because he's not like a fucking model, but he sure is. They're taking in his courage, his body. He's a man. And he's fucking young. They're going nuts over him, which I'm sure he gives a fucking... Lavrov has said Russia,

which launched what it calls a special military operation against Ukraine last week, would face a real danger if Kiev acquired nuclear weapons. Well, how would they do... What does that mean, Dallas? You're a war guy. How would they acquire... From us? Oh, they're worrying about us?

Handing over some shit. Yeah. We don't fucking have to do that. And then you got these idiots on TV saying, we need a no-fly zone, which is a declaration of war against Russia if we did that. We're shooting down Russian... Right. Adam Kinzinger, that

fucking cocksucker. I guess he was in the military at one point, or am I dreaming? Isn't he a vet? Piece of garbage, whatever he is. One guy I don't respect. He said we should get in like a hot war with Russia, you know. Lavrov has,

and if you disagree, the media labels you a Putin lover, and if you disagree with what Biden's doing. Lavrov has previously claimed that Russia was trying to stop Ukraine from obtaining nukes, despite Zelensky's assurances that he had no intention on doing so. Zelensky's assurances that he had no intention on doing so. I don't know. No, just get them everything they're asking for. They're not even asking for American bodies over there. They just want weapons and whatever the fuck.

And if you remember jerk off Joe Biden during the debates saying, Putin, I will take no crap from Putin. The backdrop was that Trump was a secret agent with Putin. And what's his name? Jerk off Joe during the debates. He'll be scared of me. He will not invade Ukraine. These are actual quotes. He'll never invade you under my watch, whatever the fuck.

Yappy, yappy. Guy has failed on every level. Anyways, speak of the jerk-off, not my president, not yours, not anybody's really, even some of the leftists on him. He gave a State of the Union last night, and I'm sitting here going, oh, this ought to be a bag of lies. This will be fun, see him put a twist on his, maybe the worst year a president ever had in office, and not because of him. Just think about it.

Fucking inflate. I filled my car up. It was $92. And I'm in fucking Georgia. And there was gas in it when I put some in. So it would have been $100. You know, people can't even afford

some of the food now in supermarkets. Cherkoff, you believe we're buying oil from Russia? We're supporting their... Putin makes... I heard this on TV.

Putin makes a billion dollars a day because of the arrangements. We shut down Keystone and we actually make this guy a billion dollars a day, which he spends with... On what? The military.

Fucking asinine. He should have come out last night and said, I have fucked everything up. We're going to drill here. We're going to fucking lease here. We're going to open a Keystone. If, but no, not even a mention, not even a mention that we're cutting our own necks. Again, because there's ten guys in a room running the world,

I don't know who the fuck they are. I know one of them's Pat Sajak. No, he's actually a Republican, bad pick. Anyways, here's some. I'm just going to. My buddy Dallas here pulled some clips from the speech last night. First time I've seen him. I watched the speech and was getting a headache. I literally flipped over to the Bruins game halfway through. I can only take so much lying. I get nuts over it.

Like Joe Rogan said, why doesn't Nick get so crazy about this shit? I don't know. It affects my world. Go ahead. COVID has impacted every decision in our lives and the life of this nation. And I know you're tired, frustrated, and exhausted. That doesn't even count the close to a million people who sit at a dining room table or a kitchen table and look at an empty chair. Because they lost somebody.

But I also know this because of the progress we've made because of your resilience and the tools that we have provided by this Congress. Tonight I can say we're moving forward safely back to a more normal routine. We've reached a new moment in the fight against covid that's enough shut the fuck up he's taking credit which everybody predicted they're not even good at lying everybody predicted he's going to come out tonight and try to take credit for the end of cove which went away uh on its own by the way. You were wrong about the fucking science, about the mask, about everything. Everything.

And the only reason he had vaccines to work with is because Trump fucking, and his Warp Speed project. And they don't work anyways. I don't care if you blame Trump for that either. He had to get it out in five minutes. What's your excuse, Dingleberry? And look at the two fucking ugly defensive backs behind him. Look at the neck on fucking Carmelo. What is she, a fullback for the Steelers? Then you got that other fucking Botox.

Look at her scarecrow face. She's going to rub her knuckles later. Dallas showed me this. It's fucking, so anyways, he didn't do anything with COVID. Really, nothing at all. Okay, what else does he want to lie about? Putin is now isolated from the world more than he has ever been. Oh, who did that? Together.

Together. What a fucking bunch of horse shit. Pause. He's isolated because of his own actions. Not anything you did, you dink. Even the Republicans have to stand because it is, you know, Putin is. But the Democrats, they've been shitting on Putin for six years. Now he's the, remember, you remember fucking Mitt Romney of debating Obama?

Obama was this fucking pompous left-wing Marxist jerk-off. Well, Mitt, what did he say, the 80s called him. They want their foreign policy back. When Romney said it was our biggest geopolitical threat was Russia. Obama, this fucking... Did they ever get anything right? Ever get anything? I laugh. They hate this country.

They despise you and me. And they stand in a... And Biden, I can't even get mad at him because he's just an empty shell right now. They're putting shit in front of him. He's just reading it and shit. He goes back to the fucking house and eats green jello and watches

fucking murder she wrote 11 times, thinking it's a new one. Anyways, what else we got? So this one continues on. Oh, go ahead. Go ahead. Together,

along with our allies, we are right now enforcing powerful economic sanctions. We're cutting off Russia's largest banks in the international financial system. Pause. Really? Tell that to the mother with fucking 10 kids hiding in a fucking basement somewhere. What? You're hurting them in the wallet?

I don't know. How about throwing a few more guns this way? Ugh. What do you do? Look, it's a tough position. I don't know. How about throwing a few more guns this way? Ugh. What do you do? Look, it's a tough position. I mean, but I feel like we're standing. But I just feel like America in the back in the 40s would have stepped in.

You can't be watching innocent people get massacred. But it's a different game with fucking Cuckoo with his finger on the button and threatening to fucking, you know. I don't know if we can call him on his bluff, but you've got to support him in other ways other than hitting him in the wallet, don't you? I sent him some finger sandwiches. I don't know if they're going to get their FedEx. They like, you know, I don't want the go-wumpies.

All right, let's stupid talk. Preventing Russia's central bank from defending the Russian ruble. Spit it out, cocksucker. preventing Russia's central bank from defending the Russell ruble, making Putin's $630 billion war fund worthless. We're choking Russia's access. Pause. As you're doing that, you're letting him make a billion dollars a day, literally, because of your energy policies. Even Democrats are upset about that.

You smug, lying fuckstain, you. Keystone. Whatever. We're buying oil from a fucking... From the psycho he's describing. How can you even stand there? Let him talk some other... Hold on.

I just want to say one thing. This is him. What are we doing? What's going on right now? I don't know. Ask the two lesbians behind you. Go ahead. If we're to advance liberty and justice, he's slurring, we need to secure our border and fix the immigration system. Pause. How fucking dare you, as you're flying illegals in planes in the middle of the night, spreading them out all over the United States from countries that are on our terror lists, unvetted, not even checked for

COVID. You're doing it in the middle of the night so we know it's not on the up and up. And you're going to sit there and talk about our immigration problems. You fucking penile implant you go ahead look at ted he goes i'll applaud look at the look on his face pause why do you even do that ted are See, that even tells me a lot. I can't be seen not applauding that. Yeah, you can. Marjorie Taylor was doing this. Making fun of him.

Meanwhile, Texas has like a ton of people of guard on the border right now. Yes. Yeah, who knows better than a senator from Texas? He puts it. Yes, we saw the smirk on your face, the smug look, but you don't have to stand up for that Should be going like this. I like the way they do it in England parliamentary. Oh boo I say that you're full of shit and they all yell out and shit. That's how it should be. Anyways, go ahead

And as you might guess I think we can do both At our border we've installed new technologies like cutting-edge scanners to better detect drug smuggling. We've set up joint patrols in Mexico and Guatemala to catch more human traffickers. We're putting in place dedicated immigration judges, a significant larger number, so families fleeing persecution and violence can have their cases heard faster, and those who don't legitimately hear can be sent back. We're screening, we're securing commitments and supporting partners in South and Central America to host more. All right, shut up, shut up, shut the fuck up.

What you just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. In this country. May God have mercy on your soul. Yeah. People are watching it who watch MSNBC and oh yes, he's not doing that bad. This is a president. He's presidential. No mean tweets.

He's telling you about protecting this border as he's flying motherfuckers in. How dare you? Oh, my sister's home. What else we got, Eddie? This guy's giving me nausea. That's why the Justice Department

has required body cameras, banned chokeholds, and restricted no-knocks warrants for its officers. That's why the American Rescue Plan that you all provided, $350 billion that cities, states and counties can use to hire more police, invest in more proven strategies.

Oh, pause. Why are you applauding, shithead? You're the reason this dickhead's in, by the way. Really? I know Joe kept saying, you're getting credit for this, but he kept saying, no, I'm not defunding the police.

But meanwhile, police, there was money being drained from New York and a few other places. Now, that murder's at an all-time high and everybody knows it. He has to come out, that fucking law and order guy, give him,

oh, and he banned chokeholds. Murder's up about 500% everywhere. This week, I was reading on the news on the internet. Lady, remember about a month ago, a Chinese lady, I think it was New York, some guy beat her over the head

with a brick. She died after a month. I saw a clip that was too gross to show. A lady just sitting here, this is like this week in New York City, sitting at a subway stop on a bench by herself. Homeless guy comes up with a bag of human shit and smashes it in her face

and rubs it on her head and shit. And there was a third thing that was just as gross as that. I can't remember. Another woman gets stabbed to death. But anyways, tell us about Law & Order, Joe. Fucking Clyburn. Proven strategies like...

What are they clapping for? Proven strategies like community violence interruption, trusted messengers, breaking the cycle of violence and trauma, and giving young people some hope. We should all be the answer. What are you just listing wishes? You know what I mean? Is anybody gonna check if he's actually doing any of this shit? What a fucking... Meanwhile, you watched 500, or 500 riots a couple years ago during couple years ago after Floyd and shit. If you counted Portland every night, people died, billions of dollars in damage. You fuckers didn't say a word.

The twat behind you, Harris, actually bailed people out of jail in Minneapolis. Now you're going to sit here and tell us about how you're cop-friendly. Ooga-foga. It's not to defund the police. It's to fund the police. Oh! Fund them. Fund them.

Look at Pork. Scalise can't even clap. Pause. Scalise is like, yeah! I got a feeling in my right hand when I was picked off playing third base. Thanks to you, you muffin head. Look at Jerkoff. She's looking at her stock quotes. Go ahead. I ask Democrats and Republicans alike to pass my budget and keep our neighborhoods safe.

And we'll do everything in my power to crack down on gun trafficking of ghost guns that you can buy online. Assemble at home. All right. No serial numbers. Good. Can't be traced. Beautiful. I ask Congress to pass proven measures to reduce gun violence.

Pause. How about black crime? I haven't heard you say. Even Bill Clinton in the fucking 80s goes, white people have a right to fear black crime. He actually said it. And it wasn't as bad as it is now. Why don't you say that? We don't have a right to fear black crime. He actually said it. And it wasn't as bad as it is now. Why don't you say that? We don't have a crime problem in this country. We have a black crime problem.

Until somebody can say that on TV, like a well-known anchorman, we're never going to fucking solve any of this shit. Black illegitimacy rates. That's the cause of most of this shit. You know, you like to go back to the root causes, Carmela.

Why don't you check that one out? Oh, you're a woman of color. What a waste of tits. Anyways, let's go to the next clip before I jump through the screen and choke this guy. This is the last one. Oh, beautiful. Beautiful. Good.

So what next we have is three clips from the thing with other people doing stuff. What do you mean? Three clips of the speech with other people doing stuff. What do you mean? Three clips of the speech with other people doing stuff. Oh, tell me what they are. Just tell me what the setup is. So this is instead of Ukrainians, we have Uranians. Oh, that's right.

He actually said Iranians. Iranians. Yeah. This isn't a gaffe, but let's even, what's her name? Carmela made a face. They circle Kiev with tanks. What's that guy gain the hearts and souls of the Iranian people hi Dave You hear what he just said of the Iranian people uranium people look at Carmela's face you dimwit He just said uranium people folks And now here's Pelosi.

Here's Pelosi. Watch this. No way to clap. Face many dangers. One being stationed at bases breathing in toxic smoke from burn pits. Look at her. She's rubbing her fucking. What did I say earlier? Crip. Yeah, her crip knuckles her fucking what are you trying to start a fire with those bony fucking look at her look at this psycho

look on her face look at this no way it's cuz she's got arthritis if she claps her thumbs will fly up. Ugh, go ahead. She's crazy. A cancer that would put them in a flag-draped coffin. I know. 13. One of those. Yeah! That was Lauren Bobert?

Is that her name? Yep. Lauren, Lisa, Lucy, I don't know. That was Bobert, who we like. She said, you put them in the coffin, 13 of them. He didn't even mention the guys that died during Afghanistan, the Kabul exit. Didn't even bring them up. And there's another guy we're going to get rid of, the fucking bachelor.

I've had enough of his rhino shit. He's always on the fence. That's it, right? So that's Joe just lying in the country. What else could you expect? Make me a sandwich. Make me a fucking sandwich. And I shut up and make me a sandwich segment tonight.

House Speaker, you just saw her rubbing her bony hands together. Nancy Pelosi suggested two. I love how they put Democrat California. You fucking think anybody doesn't know that? Suggested Tuesday that Americans are uninformed. There you go. Now we're getting to how they really feel about you. Uninforming, stupid, dumb. And what's hilarious is she's talking about people who vote Republican Trump supporters when in actuality This is who the Dems have for voters fucking they let they want people to vote that people that are in prison They're informed they go after young college kids. Oh who's brighter than a young college kids, right?

people who are Apparently if you ask them to show an ID that's's a burden. So I'm sure they're sharp as a tack. Right? Think about who they rely on. Immigrants who don't even speak the language. We're letting them vote in like local elections. Oh, but they're informed. As opposed to mostly white and smart, smart black and brown conservative people.

It's hilarious that they think we're the uninformed ones. Look at her. I could just fucking, her fucking throat looks like my balls on a humid day. I just like to, well, I used to until I started doing these fucking shots. Now they look like Spanish peanuts. Suggested Tuesday that Americans are, so in other words, folks, it's not that he's a bad president. You're just too dumb to understand that he's a bad president.

You're just too dumb to understand what he's trying to do. But we're not. We know what he's trying to do. He's a globalist. I think Ukraine has a ton of dirt on him. Wait till that comes out. See how that gets pushed out of the way? Anyways, on Tuesday, Americans are uninformed about President Biden's agenda. We know exactly what he's trying to... What he has work to do in the White House,

but concluded that those who call the United States home are blessed to have him as a president. Who gives a fuck what you think? Are you shitting me? Can you imagine saying that? Is that why his approval number's at a fucking wrecking low for a president? Oh, I guess we don't understand how polls work either. I like to put one in your throat. Fucking ask for a reason behind Biden's decline in polling. Oh, here we go. On certain issues, including COVID-19 and inflation, Pelosi told, again, the fucking, the network, the state news MSNBC host,

Andrea Mitchell, who's been around since they invented dirt, that she believes the president's work is misunderstood and that his State of the Union address will be very important because it will provide him an opportunity to lie on a bigger scale and have a teleprompter and a speech in there that we thought about for weeks. It'll be excellent. We'll fool all you dummies out there. He'll have an opportunity to talk about it, his agenda, she says. Shut up! Shut, shut, shut, shut, shut up! Shut up!

For people to appreciate what the president has done, they must have to be on bath salts, she said, and meth. And that working together with the Congress, blah, blah, blah. They have to know what it is, Pelosi said, referencing. It's sort of like when she used to say, we'll have to pass the bill to know what's in it. What a condescending cunt. She's 81 years old.

She's out of her fucking mind when she was 45. Somebody fucking somebody quit killing us. Quit fucking killing us. So I said to Muhammad, I said to Muhammad, quit fucking killing us. Referencing So I said to Muhammad, I said to Muhammad, I can't be sure you're going to kill an arsehole.

Referencing a quote from, she quotes President Abraham Lincoln on the values of public sentiment. What in God? You pompous, stock-up, snot-nosed, English, giant, twerp, scumbag, fuck-faced, dickhead, asshole. With it, you can accomplish almost everything. Without it, practically nothing, Pelosi said, echoing Lincoln's view on public opinion. But people have to know for public sentiment, too. Just say you put your finger in the air and go, which way is the wind blowing politically that's expedient for my party?

Noting that people still are suffering in America, Pelosi said the issues that relate to the well-being of the American are being well-served under Biden. How the fuck can you? Do you understand where we are? There was a time, we probably weren't around, but maybe in the 50s, that a politician would say things aren't going that well. Here's why. Here's what we got to do.

Not her. We're being well served by Biden. Gas prices through the roof. We're on the verge of World War III, by the way. Fucking inflation. You put kids in masks and almost fucked up a generation of kids for no reason whatsoever. And I'm forgetting, immigration,

you've already changed the demographic of this country without the will of the people having any input. But we're being well served. I hope you find a lump on your tit the size of two grapefruit, you fruit. What? And action. There's, Dallas likes that. He's a director. There's no one, no one more empathetic than Joe Biden. There's no one who cares more. We're so blessed that he's president at this time because we do have to build America better.

And that's what he is doing. Can you fucking imagine saying that in a straight face? Here's Joe letting a silent but deadly one go as he leaves the air. Last week, Pelosi told reporters that it was important for Americans to understand her yeast infections and why they stink up the House chamber. I understand the brilliance of Biden's response to the Russian invasion in Ukraine. Brilliance? Brilliance? He said it was never going to happen.

This is like the guy who lights his house on fire then puts it out and wants to take credit for it. Should have never happened in the first place, you cum guzzler. I think it's really important for people to understand the brilliance with which President Biden, what are you, sucking his dick in real life? Picture that and throw up.

President Biden, in conducting this, Pelosi said, at the time, per Fox News congressional correspondent Chad Pergram, this is a man who served the decades as chair of the Foreign Affairs Committee. He knows the arena. He knows the personality, said the Botox bitch right up in here. You fucking whore. That's right. Yeah, that's it.

Go home. Get my dinner ready. That was nasty. That was some nasty stuff. We'll do one more, and then I will get into why I wasn't here yesterday. Finally tonight, Rosa Park. Rosa Park is here. more, and then I will get into why I wasn't here yesterday. Finally tonight, Rosa Park. Rosa Park at here.

My fucking accent. I just said Rosa. Rosa Park at here. What was her name that brought on the bus? Rosa Parks. That brought on the bus. Who was the black bitch who wouldn't sit on? Who's the twat that got real pushy? A black woman has accused Delta Airlines of discrimination

after a flight attendant allegedly asked her to move to the back of a plane to make room for two white women. Hey, where are the white women at? First class where they belong, bitch. Can you imagine, can you imagine, I can't even believe, black people want us to believe, this woman specifically,

that in 2022 a Delta flight attendant would go, you have to go to the back. It's, that's how you know this is more propaganda. This is out of the New York Post, I believe, which Delta flight attendant would go, you have to go to the back. That's how you know this is more propaganda. This is out of the New York Post, I believe, which that's how fucking left-wing New York is, even that thing. I can't even read that thing anymore. Anyways, yeah, I'm sure in 2022, some guy said, what are you, get back there with the others.

Camille Henderson said she was sitting near row 15 window during a February 3rd flight from Atlanta to San Francisco when the woman who were sitting in the aisle and middle seats in the row next to her said they had first class tickets. They felt like they were ticketed first class seats, but they couldn't provide the tickets, Henderson told the news outlet, adding that the women continued the complaints for over. First of all, that's bullshit. If you couldn't prove you had tickets, you'd be booed, right? It's either on your cell phone or you have a paper ticket. So I'm not buying that, but I could be wrong. Hennison told the station that flight attendants then came up with a

solution to give the woman more space at her expense. See, this is where we are in this country in 2022. God forbid a black person had to give up something for a white, legitimate, which people do every day, and I'm sure black people have given up. I've done it

a thousand times, letting people sit together, marry people. But in 2022, this is a national story because she, wait till you hear her quote, are you flying by yourself? A person heard asking Henderson and she replied this.

What folks says about this family, I does. I has told you and told you that you can always tell a lady by the way that she eats in front of folks like a bird. And I ain't aiming for you to go to Mr. John Wilkinson's and eat like a field hand and gobble like a hog. That's what she said. They said to her, there's a seat back there in aisle 34.

It's an aisle seat, the apparent attendant says. Henderson, who said the crew did not ask the woman, the white woman, to move, agreed reluctantly to go to the back row, according to the outlet. not ask the woman, the white woman, to move, agreed reluctantly to go to the back row, according to the outlet. Here's a report on the story. I don't want to make it a race thing, but instead of asking the two white women that were seated next to me in an attempt to accommodate them, you know, they basically made me...

Pause. I don't want to make it a race thing, but the two white women, and this is coming out of a black woman, well, you just made it a race thing this how ignorant this broad is see and think about her mindset just paranoia fucking whitey trying to get one over on me and that's how 99 of black people think am i a little high with that no i might be a little low with it can you fucking imagine go ahead i have to move and i just don't know why i had to move because you know that was the seat that i paid for so pause pause did they force you to move did they force you to move you could have said no i'm staying here right okay again paranoid again paranoid is it because we're black it's because you're fucking crazy an airline oh sorry does she have any more to her new seat at the back of the plane

she said she was embarrassed by the experience as i'm walking back there it's just humiliating you know it's like having the entire you know uh flight look at you you know everybody's kind of pause pause if they first of all they weren't because you're a narcissist and if they were you know if they were they were looking to see if you were being the victim of some type of racism even white people they weren't staring at you like going look at this black bitch she tried to steal the white woman's seat she's this fucking this fucking broad is just, this is so typical. Are we done with this whore? Sorry.

Didn't mean that either, lady. I'm sure you're pretty nice. You just hate white people. What the fuck's new? An airline spokesman told ABC7 in a statement, we are going to look into the situation to better understand what happened. I wonder if you give a spiel about the company's values and shit. Do they say that like every? Delta has no tolerance for discrimination in any form. And these

allegations run counter to our deeply held values, respecting, honoring the diversity of our customers. Ever watch a Delta promo? Ever watch a Delta promo? When they show you, they run that little video. You shouldn't, you shouldn't be smoking, but, but shouldn't be smoking, put your laptops away. It's a white guy doing all the wrong shit. Or black women and Asian doing all the wrong... They're the most anti-fucking-white. They had an ad on the wall one time

that I couldn't even... I talked about it on my act. I don't even remember. I lost my mind. But yes, that's what they were trying to do, lady. Henderson vowed to never, never fly Delta again. Boy, I bet you they're bumming out. You big baby.

Me as a black woman, I was displaced to make two... Again, I don't want to make this about race, but these two cracker bitches, these two Karen motherfuckers, two white women comfortable. That doesn't make any sense to me she told the outlet wow and there it is therein lies the mentality

and why we're never going to make it work that's it that is it real quickly I want to talk about yesterday that's it for the news I should say tough day for me yesterday you've heard me reference this guy on the show many times.

My buddy, Greg Zook, retired cop, lawyer now. You've heard me mention him many times. I've quoted him on the show because he's seen a lot and he's a real law, you know, a law and order guy, one of us. And he, we didn't hear from him for three or four days, me and my wife. We text constantly. My wife texts with him more than I do, sending back jokes and shit. He had a great set. So we didn't hear from him. And it crossed my mind on Sunday, but I wanted to be in denial. You know what I mean? So finally, we get a call from his nephew who lives in Colorado saying, have you heard from Greg? And that's when me and my wife were like, oh, fuck. So me and my wife called the sheriff's department. He bought a house not two and a half

hours from Savannah in Georgia in the middle of nowhere. It's the type of guy he is. He's like a cop, loves his quiet. You know what I mean? He was thinking of flipping. He loved Savannah so much he was going to flip that house. So he worked on it for a year, year and a half, made it beautiful. And so, yeah, we don't hear from him. We call the sheriff's office down there and said, check on them, do a welfare check. And they said the deputies, you know, they called us back.

The deputies are on the scene or whatever, and they'll call you back. And they didn't call us back for like an hour. So I said, we have to go down there anyways. So me and my wife got in the car and the whole two and a half hour trip, we didn't hear from them. It turns out they can't because we weren't next of kin. I talked to the lead detective. Anyways, they found him in his kitchen, dead. Most likely natural causes or whatever.

But this is a guy, folks, that if you like my comedy, he's the reason I became a stand-up comedian. Because I met him when I was 14 years old. My brother-in-law was dating my sister Darlene. They're four years old. My buddy Greg was my brother-in-law's best friend. One Sunday he came over and he thought I was like 13. And right away we started with the references and shit. I was like 13.

And right away we started with the references and shit. And he had this laugh, this contagious laugh that would, and there was nothing I enjoyed more than setting him off. And I would get so mad. He was one of these guys tell you he'd be there at 1 in the afternoon and show up around 7 that night without even, and I was a young kid. I'm like, this fucking asshole. I didn't understand that this guy just, you know, did what he did.

And we hit it off. I mean, so since the age of 13, he has been my closest friend, period. He's got, I told him stuff that my family doesn't know about me and vice versa. We just, and he's from my hometown. He grew up a fucking quarter mile, half mile up the street from me. And his family was all in law enforcement. His dad was a state trooper, mass colonel or whatever, captain, whatever the highest. Scored a perfect score on the mental exam, his old man.

His brother Norman, state trooper who passed away five years ago. Brother Norman, state trooper who passed away five years ago, and he was living in Norman's house, which, again, is about a half mile from where I grew up. And since I was 13, we never didn't talk on the phone, except when I went with the USO to Afghanistan or something like that. But we never, again, close, I want to say closer than I am to my real brother, but that's only because my brother

had a family, moved around the country, did what he had to do. But this guy was always there. He was a Miami cop for 35 years in the 80s when all that coke shit was going down and they made the movie Scarf. He saw a lot of stuff. Every time I went to Florida

to do comedy in my 30-year career, every time, except for maybe three, and I'm talking 30, probably at least 30 times. He's there. Whether it was in Orlando, he was living in Miami. He'd drive to Orlando, West Palm Beach, Tampa, whatever. Anywhere I was in Florida, he would show up. And he was there. That's us on the boat here in Savannah. What's it called? The what? Georgia Queen.

They shot Ozarks on that boat. So that was this past summer. Show what else we got here. That looks like my house in Westchester, I think. I believe when I was doing the show out of my basement and he looked like the Big Lebowski,

which a lot of people said. He would have long hair. He would have the... And a loner, man. He was like Kung Fu. He kind of floated, did his own thing. I told you. I quoted him. He'd go undercover to these, you know, meetings

back in the 80s, and he'd buy drugs. He'd dress up. He was in his 20s when he went down to Miami. He'd dress up like he was on spring break to buy drugs and shit. I mean, he saw some hairy shit. I think that's so. What else we got?

That's him with Biff Henderson when I did my first Letterman appearance. I was so glad he came, came to New York. Because, again, I wouldn't have done this without him. I found him so goddamn funny. And that's all he did. You couldn't get a serious word out of us. I remember, I don't even know, this might be one of those, you had to be there, but when we first met him, and his weight would go up and down. He would put on 150,

then lose it, then go up and down, whatever. He came over to the house of my brother-in-law, and the Olympics were on, and my parents had their friends over, like three couples, and Zook had them crying, just making cracks out of his mouth, and I remember like a Russian guy or whatever in a Speedo doing the diving, and Zook goes,

and he goes just like this, he goes, my, talking about the bathing suit, my, ain't those scant? Like a fucking, again, I don't know, but I never saw

my dad and adults laugh that hard. My, ain't those scant. And he had a million other references about the Chinese cheating and shit. And just a jaded, cynical cop, you know. So that's him with Biff. That's when I, that's his curly,

I said, give me the curly about three stooges about getting a cab in Queens. Or is that, no, that's when I, that's his curly, actually give me the curly about three stooges about getting a cab in Queens, or is that, no, that's, that looks like it's, is that the Sullivan Theater or in my neighborhood in Queens? I can't tell. Anyhow, he helped clean up 9-11,

came up, did all that shit, stayed at my house in Astoria, my apartment, I should say, for like a couple weeks. I had to go on the road, and he stayed there. He had the keys. What else? I can't...

I don't know if that's in Westchester. My wife's laughing at me right now. Or that's the kitchen. What the fuck, Nick? Really? I don't know if that's this house I'm living in now or Westchester. It looks like the basement. That's my kitchen.

You guys know I had a new kitchen put in. That's him this summer with me and my wife demolishing the kitchen. And he loves shit like that. Like I said, he did the whole house in the middle of nowhere in Georgia himself. And one of those guys when you needed him. What else we got? That's probably the year I met him. Maybe.

On the right. That's my Uncle Ernie with the hip Playboy t-shirt on, which it was in the 70s. But that's Zook on the right. I see his weight fluctuation. And I know people go, oh, it's probably bad for his heart and shit, but whatever.

What else? There he is. He's the bouncer at the Copacabana. No, that's him at my wedding. You want to fuck with him? That was him at my wedding. Russian, by the way. His dad was a captain. I said, law enforcement, the whole family. His brother Peter is a brilliant lawyer who was actually on 60 Minutes. Very interesting family. Very Danvers family where I grew up. Everybody knew the Zooks. Is that the final photo? Just a couple of quick stories. I love this guy. I was having my shoulder operated on in high school. I don't know if it was my first one or my second one. And I called him. I said, I'm fucking bored. Get me out of here. So he shows up. I didn't think he'd come.

Fucking shows up. I had my long winter coat. I tucked in my gown a little bit, like into my waist, so they couldn't see it hanging. Put the fucking coat on. This is at nighttime. Get in the elevator, and he takes

me to a strip club in the combat zone in Boston. I got my hospital gown under my fucking coat. Ended up doing something dirty with a stripper who I thought was old at the time. I was 19, so she was probably 27. All I remember is buying her a tequila sunrise and it cost me like $14. I had never, you know,

I don't think I ever bought a strip or a drink. You know, they rape you, obviously. And she sat on my lap because I was 19 and handsome and on the way home he said, I went to scratch my face. He goes, don't touch your face. Put your hand out the window. And when we got together, we were known.

Shit went bad. We're two black clouds. And we got together. This is a running joke between his family, my family, anybody who knew us. If we got together, we'd always fuck shit up. We had a camp up in Maine we'd go to every once in a while. My father brings a boat up on a trailer, right? We're in the car.

My dad, the place where you back down the ramp to put it in the lake was across the way from where the camp was. So my father says, I'm going to take the boat to the camp. Me, you, and Greg take the car back. Cut to an hour later, we're lost. We're already a little drunk. We weren't going to pay attention. We're in the fucking woods. It's literally a 12-minute drive back to the camp. It's like an hour and a half later. I remember us going down a dead end,

so we couldn't back out with a trailer. You know, you ever track a boat back? Anyways, so we fuck up the trailer. I'm going to tell you right now, all these things happen in a three hour span. So my father's fucking yelling at us. You fucking idiots. We get back. I clog the toilet

as soon as we get back. Family's going, what the fuck? About an hour later, my dad wants to go water. We want to go water skiing. My dad's first. He's in the water. I'm driving. Zook's in's in the water. I'm driving. Zook's in charge of the rope. My father falls. I'm circling the rope around.

Right? And Zook tells me to back up. I cut the rope with a propeller. My father goes like this. You hear echoing across the lake, you fucking idiots, idiots, idiots. Me and Zook are like, oh my God, he's fucking swearing at us from the, cut the rope. This is all in a couple hour period. Anyways, luckily we had two. We finished a water ski. He was a great water skier, Zook. He could put up a spray slalom ski. We go back to the camp. We're sitting out there drinking. It's starting to get around five, six o'clock. Wind's picking up. It looks like it's going to rain, and the wind starts to really pick up. My father goes, guys, bring those yellow rubber rafts that you use.

Like a couple of idiots. I've got to believe we had alcohol in us, but we're bringing those up to put them in a screened-in area. Of course, I drag mine over a rock and it fucking pops. This is all in a three-hour period. And I, whatever. Everybody was scared when we got together. My high school year, I went down to Miami to, what do you call it, Fort Lauderdale for spring break. Not high school, excuse me, college. Me and

some fraternity brothers. A bunch of other ones come down that weren't coming. So we had, I think we had two hotel rooms, and it was literally like 26 guys. It was like 13 in each room. After the third night, every night, you go back, pass out.

Somebody came in and stepped on my head. I hadn't slept because people are, you know, coming in at 5, 6. I just, even for a college guy, I go, this is fucked up. I mean, so many guys in one room. I call Zook because he lived in Miami. I go, get me the fuck out of here. Sure enough, he shows up. I think he even bought the ticket. I can't remember. Or my old man bought it. Whatever. Shows up the next day. Takes me to Miami. His beat

was the Miami airport. So he takes me to the fucking airport. I was out of there, I think, after three or four days. Went back and did it again. But always there for me is my point, you know. And he became a lawyer, passed the bar, so he's no dummy. But he's as cynical about the world as makes me look Pollyannish. Anyways,

he's the reason I get into comedy. His parents owned a hotel in my hometown and it had a miniature golf course behind it. And the restaurant was the most popular place in my town, Fried Clams. You couldn't even get near it on a Friday night. And they had a hotel.

And me and Greg were obsessed with the Three Stooges when I first met him as a kid. I would actually record the Stooges and make him laugh. I'd go listen to it. So we were obsessed with the Stooges. And he goes, I got to show you something. One day he has a Christmas card of the three Stooges. Oh, the Christmas card was signed Moe, Larry, and Curly. And he had a camera, old footage of them coming out of the hotel. They were filming a, making a movie in Boston somewhere or on the North Shore. And they stayed at his parents' hotel.

Or his grandparents, I should say. And they, yeah, there's grainy footage of them coming out of the fucking... Anyways, it's just, he was my best friend in the world. Your high school friends kind of drift off. They, you know, start a family. You know, I was a comic. I was friend in the world. Your high school friends kind of drift off, they, you know, start a family, you know. I was a comic, I was always on the road. I

just lost touch with a lot of people but him, you know, and whether I was on the road, anyway, we're on the phone every night, yeah, I've been like old ladies, him making me laugh. And this last year and a half, he would come up almost every weekend and stay at my house with me and my wife in Savannah. And now we're never going to see him again. We went down there and watched, you know, then pull him out. Anyways, rest in peace, Greg.

We love you to fucking death. I was never closer to anybody. And again, he's the reason I became a comic. And I owe him so much. It's not fair. He's only 64. But he always joked about dying young because his family, the longevity thing is not, you know. He would always joke about it.

He had hip surgery. They put in hips that were made of Jesus. Begins with a B. What's an element that begins with a B? Come on, Dallas, you know. Why can't I think of it? Anyways, um, it poisoned him and thousands of other people. And the guy said, when you die, this is what will kill you. But we don't know that's the case.

Anyways, they think it's natural causes. So that's it, folks. Don't mean to end on a bummer, but that's why I wasn't here yesterday. And his nephew, I think, is flying in today and probably will stay with me and my wife. And his brother, Peter, who's a certified genius, he flew in last night. I think he's staying at a hotel down there.

That is it. Again, sorry to end it that way. I didn't want to open with it, then I wouldn't be able to do the show. But we love you, Greg. We're thinking of you. That's it, folks. You think it, I'll say it. You're very welcome.

See you back here tomorrow at the same time. Say a prayer for Gregory Zook. Take care. ស្រូវាប់ពីពីពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ពាប់ព� guitar solo Outro Music