The Nick DiPaolo Show - White House Cocaine Cover Up | Nick Di Paolo Show #1424

Episode Date: July 10, 2023

In this episode right leaning comedian Nick Di Paolo talks about the WH cover up, Biden's cluster bomb promise and more! Like what you hear?  Get TWICE as much "Nick Di Paolo Show", full episodes of Steven Crowder’s “Louder with Crowder” show and more on Mug Club! Sign up today to get all their content at https://NickDiPaoloShow.com and use the promo code NICKDIP to get your first month FREE! For Tour Dates, Merch, stand-up clips and more visit https://nickdip.com

🎵 We'll do it live. Okay. We'll do it live! Fuck it! Do it live! I'll write it and we'll do it live. Fucking thing sucks. Gets me every time. It's me yelling at Dallas. Welcome, folks. Welcome back from the weekend. God, Monday here gets too quick.

How are you? What's the fucking static here? Touching my volume. Fucking Radio Shack. Will they come up with some new shit? Anyways, great to be with you on a Monday. Don't forget this weekend I shall be with Dallas, actually, at the Arlington Cinema Drafthouse, Arlington, Virginia, Friday and Saturday night. So come on out. We'll do a couple shots after.

Start sucker punching people like you know the knockout game okay even i'm 61 and i'll end up dead i wouldn't ever do that um anyhow real quick a weekend recap i'm gonna rip right through it not bored you ufc i'm trying to get people i know it's been around 30 years, but it must be in its prime right now. It's the best fucking $79 I spend every other weekend. UFC, was it $290 this week? I can't keep up. I can't even do it justice.

The fights were fucking phenomenal. Unbelievable. Brandon Moreno was this kid who, he fought a guy who beat him twice back in the day, way early in their career before Brandon Moreno. He's got the belt now. I can't even remember the weight class. But I got to hand him credit.

He welcomed this kid to fight him again. They'd already beat him twice. Sure enough, the fucking guy beat him a third time and took his belt. And it was, I'm talking movies, standing, exchanging, fucking eyes closed and blood. Dude, epic. Every one of them was, there wasn't a boring fight in there. And all the matchups, this is the shit that makes me hard. You got like these, you don't get whiter than a fucking New Zealander or a, right? Fucking South African white versus like a black dude. It's the one, I'm sorry. It's the one sport the blacks don't dominate yet. They're fucking killer at it. John

Jones is probably the best ever out of Sanya. He's black when they're, you know, good. They're great at it. But to watch a pasty white guy beat the fucking shit out of some black guy from Detroit, I get hard. I'm just saying. It's all above ground, and it really is. There's no arguing who is tougher. And after, you know, they're not ignorant. It's not like boxing.

They can, you know. But it was. I can't say enough about it. It was just, I fucking, it's right up there now. I got football. I got hockey, baseball, and this, I don't know where I put it. It's insane. I haven't seen a bad one either in a long, anyway, I'm just saying. So watch the next one. Red Sox have ripped off eight out of nine, five games above 500. I think it's the high mark for them this year going into the... Still in the bottom.

Huh? Still in the bottom. Yeah. Still in the bottom. I don't know. I think they might have passed the Yankees. Maybe. Yeah.

That division is so frigging tough. Five games over. Any other division, they're in first place. And they're fun to watch. I don't give a shit. They're getting healthier. They're fun to watch. You guys don't give a fuck if you're in first place. And they're fun to watch. I don't give a shit. They're getting healthier. They're fun to watch. You guys don't give a fuck

if you're not from Boston. Went to Boone Hall Plantation and took my wife to Charleston for her birthday. Yeah, I do shit like that. Anything that involves slavery, I'm in. So I took her to Charleston.

Of course, she knows. She looks up the shit to do. Boone Hall Plantation. If you guys watched the miniseries years ago, North and South, it's where they shot the opening scene, Patrick Swayze's on a horse, two girls are running from the big beautiful house, and we took a tour of that, and an actual tour, and they still have the slave quarters there, and I didn't know you're not supposed to laugh during a tour of the slave houses. I was admonished twice. I go,

no, I'm just saying, how horrible are these white people? Saw a tree, a tree that's over a thousand years old. What the fuck? I mean, it was enlightening and entertaining. And yeah, enlightening and entertaining. And, yeah. And made a calamari with pesto. I don't even, I think I made that myself. I don't know. It was fucking, I didn't do that at the plantation when I got home.

What's the matter with you people? All right, enough of that horse shit. It was a good weekend. I'm just saying, I usually don't get off my ass. Let's get on with it. Cocaine Cowboys. We're giving you an update real quick on the cocaine story the way cocaine scandal engulfing the white house has taken a dramatic new twist with the biden administration and press secretary karen jean-pierre caught in an epic lie what's new

the white house had consistently maintained president joe biden first lady jill biden and first son hunter biden were away from the White House beginning on Friday, June 30th, and did not return until Tuesday, July 4th. The bag of cocaine found in the West Wing was discovered at the White House on Sunday. But according to the official press pool report for June 30th, President Biden gave remarks in the Roosevelt room that afternoon and didn't depart the White House for Camp David until 6.34 p.m., okay? So once again, they're fucking lying. Bye-bye. Yeah, away they went at 6.34, joining him on that trip with Jill Hunter and Hunter's

son, Beau Biden. What? Hunter's son, Beau? Oh, what? He's got a son, Beau? Name your boy, I guess. Oh, tellingly, the official record of presidential whereabouts directly contradicts and battled Jean-Pierre, who angrily insisted at a press briefing on Friday. They were not here Friday, she said. You're a liar, liar, whore, liar, whore, and you know it. Look at her, corn on the cob. They were not here Saturday, she said. They were not here on Sunday, she said. They were not even here on Monday, July 3rd, she said. They came back on Tuesday, June 4th.

To ask that question is actually incredibly irresponsible. And I'll just leave it there, said the corn on the cob. And here's her yelling at the reporter. Whoops. I'm sorry, that's from this weekend at the Boone Hall. A former secret servant agent dan bongino said he believed only a member of the first family could have walked it in he knows because he worked at the white house there's absolutely zero chance anyone other than a family member brought that cocaine inside the white house complex he said no chance that would make it past uh security

checkpoints family bypasses and all that other stuff. So he knows, and they're lying through their teeth. But what the fuck? Is that something new? Let's move on to a new story called Clusterfuck. The United Kingdom and the Kingdom of Spain have called upon U.S. President Joe Biden to not send cluster bombs to Ukraine amid concerns over the danger they pose to civilian populations. They do not want that shit. As Ukraine marked over 500 days since the invasion by Russian forces, significant challenges have been leveled against the war strategy of the Biden administration from its NATO

allies in Europe, with both the British and Spanish governments urging Washington to back down from its pledge to send cluster bombs into the conflict. Why don't you shut up, Europe? Save your ass. You're not even paying to fucking help. You're not paying your share. Both the UK and Spain are signatories of International Convention on Cluster Munitions. What? Which prohibits, I like those cluster candies. Which prohibits the use, manufacturing, stockpiling,

or transfer of the weapon type. However, key holdouts of the treaty, and I give the U.S. credit for this, if we're going to fucking, if we're on the, you know, if we're going to go gold, we're on the top of the world, I want to take us. No, you better use all, all dicks on board of the treaty of the United States, Ukraine, Russia,

excuse me, cluster munitions, which are banned by over 100 countries are a type of rocket bomb, missile, and other projectile that explode midair to rain down on a large area. They say umbrellas won't help. They have a high risk of failure, which could lead to them landing on ground only to explode at a later time. President Joe Biden, 80, justifies his very difficult decision, like he fucking made it, to send the deadly weapons to Ukraine. Let's listen to Shithead.

I think he dyed his hair there, didn't he? Go ahead, stupid. It was a very difficult decision on my part. And by the way, I discussed this with our allies, discussed this with our friends up on the hill. Talking about golf. And we're in a situation where ukraine continues to be brutally attacked across the board by munitions by these cluster munitions that are had dud rates that are very

very low i mean very high you know that biden said the u.s would provide cluster munitions for a transition period while claiming that they will not be used in civilian areas, but merely to, how do you fucking know where they're going to land, merely to break through the entrenched positions of the Russian forces. This explanation apparently did little in the way of assuaging NATO allies in London and Madrid. However, with both governments asking the Democrat administration to back down. And again, if Trump was there, right, he'd go, shut your fucking mouth. Because again, they're not paying their fair share, by the way. Speaking to reporters on Saturday,

British Prime Minister Rishi Sunak, what do they change every three weeks over there? Look at this, hair club for fucking Calcutta. Said per the BBC that UK is a signatory to convention which prohibits production of use of cluster munitions and discourages their use. Well, congratulations to you. The dispute comes ahead of critical NATO summit in Vinnyas, Lithuania next week, during which the prospect of Ukraine's potential membership into the alliance will be front and center. Hey, guys, in the second half of the show, I'm going to be talking about what a guy did on a scooter in New York that will shock even you and New Yorkers. It's sickening, by the way.

And also why holograms might replace live entertainment because people don't know how to behave themselves anymore, apparently. You know what I'm saying? Except for me. I'll show up live. I got to get out of the house. You know what I'm saying? Okay. It's exclusively on Mug Club, so join now to get it at nickdapaloshow.com.

Club. So join now to get it at nickdipaloshow.com. Hey, boys and girls, head over to nickdip.com to get exclusive hats, t-shirts, hoodies, and more. It's yet another way for you to support the show and look sexy at the same time. You can also get signed copies of my previous specials and all of the Nick-a-shirts. Just go to nickdip.com and click on store. Again, that's nickdip.com. Click on store. Thank you guys so much. See you soon. All righty. Shall we move on? Doggone cop. That's dog. I like to spell out my little punny things. G-O-N-E, cop. Boy, if I was any more clever, I'd have a podcast. Community members are distraught. I'll repeat that.

They are distraught. After a Lorraine police officer shot and killed a family's dog, the animal was harmless, residents say. I don't know about that. That's him. Owner Tammy Kearns said she and her daughter were trying to gather her four dogs that got loose from her house, as they will when women try to do shit. What? Cut.

I can't. I'm kidding. Near Oberlin Avenue and West A3. Oh, I'll tell you, it's a nice neighborhood. West A3 on Sunday afternoon when a police officer instructed her to get them under control. In the officer's body camera footage, released by Lorraine Police,

one of Kern's dogs approaches the officer and walks away. Shortly after, Kern's yellow Labrador retriever, as you know, they're as dangerous as pit bulls. Un-fucking-believable. We're going to show you the footage coming up. I'm just giving you trigger warning, because it is kind of hard to watch. And, you know, when I see cops shooting criminals,

I feel less because the criminals are usually armed or have a knife or a gun, you know what I mean? And the cop's life is in danger. This is, and again, it wasn't a pit bull, it wasn't a German shepherd. Shortly after Kern's yellow Labrador retrieved a Dixie, they rode old Dixie down. The dog was yelping. Nobody was helped.

Dixie approaches, and the officer, like the scumbag that he was and you know I'm a cop lubber but these are the the they were when we say there's a handful of shitheads with guns this is one of them uh actually friggin shoots the fucking dog uh the officer fires his gun at least once while the dog is crawling in the street after attempting to get away. Again, here's the video. Kind of hard to watch, but don't be a pussy. There's no audio at the beginning, but look at this. Are you fucking kidding me?

me. There's the owner out in the street. Can you imagine seeing your own dog and he, watch, the whole neighborhood's going to come out and defend her. Even a brother comes out. I'm not any older, motherfucker. Get back. Get back. Keep back. Get back. Get back. Get back. 14-0. Get me a bunch of cars out here. We got a bunch of people coming out.

Get out of the car right now. I hope somebody blows your head off. I hope somebody blows your head off, she said. You stupid fuck. You killed my dog. Get back. Why did you do it? Get back. Okay, your dog charged.

Get back. You fucker. All these people seen that. That dog is harmless. Okay. Get it, ma'am. No, I'm not. Get back.

Ma'am, I need you to get back. He knows he fucked up. Tell it in his voice. Oh, my God. We're catching her. I'm telling you. I want your name. I want your badge, everything. Palmer, 101. Oh, my God. We're a catcher. I want your name. I want your badge, everything.

Palmer 101. Why couldn't you let her? Everybody get back. Everybody get back. Get back. Everybody get back. Don't walk out like that. Get back.

Get back. Get back. All right. Yeah. How sick is that? Again, she was paralyzed after one bullet, but, you know, dirty Harry here just kept shooting her. He shot her four times, Kern said, in an interview with Cleveland.com in the plane deal. She added that she thought he was getting out of his vehicle to help her. This was

excessive force. It was terrifying. He could have tased her or used mace, but he immediately reached for his gun, she said. The dogs got out once before, and that officer opened his back door to help them get them back in. Kern said she bought Dixie in 2020 and described her as a loving animal who liked to play in the pool and with children. Yeah, it's a lab. I've yet to seen anything other than that. And this guy's had experience with this dog before?

Kern said she plans to file a lawsuit against Lorraine Police and wants the officer who gunned down the dog to be fired. And he should be, in my fucking opinion. I know it's not a human, blah, blah, blah. A vigil is planned for noon Sunday at Oberlin and West... What is going on with me? Jesus Christ.

West 8th Street. What the fuck? You're fired. Yeah, give him the old... You're fired. Give him the fucking hook? You're fired. You're fired. You're fired. You're fired. You're fired. That does not help cops

in that town. I wonder what's going to happen. I hope they give us an update on that one. It's a golden, it was a lab, right? Lab door retriever. Nicest dog ever. I know. I mean, if that's a pit bull coming at me like that,

different fucking story. Fill her with unleaded. I mean, leaded. What? Sickening. And, you know, what's sickening? You know, it's even worse that she had to witness it. You know what I mean?

She's never going to, that's going to, they do become, we become emotionally attached, whether we want to or not, to your pets, you know. And except for my dog. I might call this cop. I'm going to tell him to spray some beef juice on his pants, and I'll let my dog out the front door. Nick, that's horrible. Yeah, I know. I'm kidding.

No, go get him. Get him. I'll stop it. Come on, Charo. That's right, Charo folks. You heard it. For those of you guys on Mug Club, stick around for the second half of the show.

Everyone else, go to nicktopaloshow.com and join to get my full show and Steven Crowder's show and a whole lot more. And you can click on my tour button. We haven't put up the dates for the fall yet, I don't think. Working on it now. But I'll see you next, this weekend, actually. Me and Dallas

at the Arlington Cinema Drafthouse in Arlington, Virginia, Friday and Saturday night. guitar solo Outro Music