The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #114 I Love You

Episode Date: October 6, 2021

Between you and Nikki, she has an astronomical amount of T Swift shirts, nap time came way too early and she is really digging reaction videos. Nikki has a bone or maybe a calf to pick with Andrew's heel photos. This spurs a conversation about looking at their own material which leads to a quick game of "Joke Computer". You Heard It Here First, Nikki's uncomfortable story from the MTV awards, a quick french lesson and Nikki's theory about Prince Harry. In the Reddit Dump, why people die from burns, a sentence that's way too hard to figure out and in the Final Thought Andrew gets challenged to make a special phone call. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch

your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors,

it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. We want to speak out, and we want this to stop. Wow, very powerful. I'm Ellie Flynn, an investigative journalist, and this is my journey deep into the adult entertainment industry.

I really wanted to be a player boy in my journey deep into the adult entertainment industry. I really wanted to be a player boy in my adult. He was like, I'll take you to the top, I'll make you a star. To expose an alleged predator and the rotten industry he works in. It's honestly so much worse than I had anticipated. We're an army in comparison to him. From Novel, listen to The Bunny Trap on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. People, my people, what's up?

This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, Eve, Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. idea in my podcast and now mini questions is returning for another season we've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions including jane lynch delaney rowe and cord jefferson listen to mini questions on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your

podcasts seven questions limitless answers. The Nikki Glaser Podcast. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. The Nikki Glaser Podcast. Here's Nikki. Hello, welcome to the Nikki Glaser Podcast. I'm Nikki Glaser. It is Tuesday. I'm here with my dog, Luigi, chilling in St. Louis.

I just took a nap. I already took a nap today, and it's 1130 this morning. I had an early orthodontist appointment, and I had some cameras following me there, and so I had to look nice for it, so I had to be up super early. And I am beat. No, I've been taking naps again are you a napper you know what every time I lay down for a nap I just get distracted by my phone and then that's my nap time gone to waste I just feel like I know when I'm gonna when I'm gonna be able to nap there's just like this energy in my body that's just like cranky and I just get

like a baby like I'm rubbing my eyes and I'm just like a little there's just I know I know when I can get in a good like I got a night yesterday I wanted to go for a run but daylight was fading and I'm scared of getting arred so I knew I had to get out on the road by 6.15 if I wanted to beat the witching hour. But then I was also like so dying for a nap. So at 5.30, I went in my room and I just put on an ASMR video and set my alarm. And I took a quick, I think it took me five minutes to get to sleep. And it just happens so fast. I'm so great.

I don't mean to brag about sleeping because I know some people just can't sleep. And it's the worst thing to hear someone be like, I love sleeping. It's so easy for me. This might be a weird question. Do you go to sleep in your home clothes? Do you put on pajamas naked? I take off like today I was wearing this outfit that I'm wearing already right now. I just took

off my pants and I slept in this shirt, which probably has a couple of wrinkles from getting all nappy in it. But yeah, I this is my second Taylor Swift shirt, by the way, of the streak that I'm about to depart on. I can't wait to show you how many I have. It is truly astronomical, the number. And I don't think saying truly astronomical is correct. I think that's like saying literally astronomical. And I don't even know what astronomical means when we're talking about numbers. But I'm sure that the number it is falls within astronomy. Like it's still a number that you would use to describe

stars at some point. Um, so yeah, I, uh, I just, I just took off my pants and slept in my, but I can, you know, usually I'm in athleisure wear, but like a I like a free leg in bed you know I like I sweat a lot or I can get really overheated in bed so um god but I just am loving ASMR recently it's just like I'm having a renaissance with it of just like soothing sounds I just and it really frustrates me when people say they have trouble sleeping on planes or whatever it is or like this person was so loud. Put on white noise. I just don't understand why people can't do things that are so simple to drown out. Like if you have trouble sleeping and you're you don't wear a sleep mask and you don't use white noise, I'm going to judge you. I'm going to say you're not doing everything you can.

And I know people are like, but I can't with the sleep mask. Just try it. Just try it once. Stop making yourself special about sleep masks. Try it once. Or try the one that has the hollow eyes so that you can blink in it if you're worried about that. Also, if you're worried about an intruder and you're like,

I won't see an intruder, you're going to be dead already. The intruder is going're like i won't see an intruder you're gonna be dead already like the intruder's gonna get like you the time it takes you to move your eye mask from your eyes is not going to be the difference between life and death for you bitch i'm sorry and also it's two seconds you whip it off it's not like you like have to latch it to your head like a bicycle helmet around your jaw um and then white noise it's just like it changes the game if i want to have sexual relations with myself i throw on some white noise throw my bow speaker next to my door and it and andrew couldn't hear me if i was being murdered inside which sometimes it sounds like that when I am with someone. Yeah, so white noise is everything. I think it could solve so many issues for people. But when I'm on a plane,

I can be next to a screaming baby. I'm not even joking you, a screaming infant, and I would not hear it. And yes, I do miss emergency announcements when the plane is landing and it starts to land in Dallas. And I'm like, wait a second, second we're going to LA this seems a little bit short of a flight and then I freak out and I start texting my assistant saying I thought why are we doing a stopover in Dallas you know that I like non-stop there definitely is a non-stop from St. Louis to to LA wait and then I and I get like a tone and then she's like but it is a non-stop and then I I've then I asked my partner or my neighbor my partner my neighbor next to me are we having an emergency landing

she goes oh yeah you didn't hear it um no I didn't because I had white noise because you were chewing loud actually if the person next to me is chewing I would kind of enjoy it that's where I discovered my love of ASMR eating. But I also, I realize I only like that when I'm like really hungry. I want to watch other people eat. Otherwise, I'm just like, I don't get this. But yeah, listening to like, sorry, I'm yawning. Listening to women, I'm even talking about ASMR.

Listening to women, soft spoken, talk about their mundane lives. I mean, the best one ever. All my ASMR ladies I follow, though, I feel like I want to file a missing persons report. They eventually just go away. And I get really worried about them. Because they're all just like housewives or just like women who just have ASMR. And so they're creating content. I want to start a YouTube channel other than this one

that I have that you can watch right now. You can watch me in action with Luigi next to me. Luigi. I want to start one for Taylor Swift reaction videos because that's all I watch. You know, that's how I got into reality TV was like, God, all I watch is reality TV. Why am I not trying to make that kind of, why am I not trying to get involved in that? Why is all the TV that I auditioned for stuff I wouldn't watch? you know guitarist reacts to Taylor Swift's guitar like I just like old men who are too cool for school watching Taylor Swift and going like all right whoa okay holy shit this is good like it's like I get off on it just seeing people surprised by how talented she is because that's like my dream is to expose her music to people like there's this one guy i love let me give him a shout out he does reaction videos to a lot of stuff but he doesn't even have that many views but i freaking love his channel um and he does uh you know he does reaction videos oh my god our stills i'm looking at our youtube channel our

stills for our youtube is so funny the one recently my mouth is like twisted my glasses look like they're not even on straight but it's because my face is so freaking twisted um i can't even find it youtube is not easy for me to look like i stop shorts stop trying to be tiktok youtube um anyway i'll find it when i this is gonna waste time oh this is the this is the this is my number one favorite asmr video are you ready yeah okay this is a woman who is i think for so her account is Barbie Lion. Just how you'd spell Barbie, how you'd spell Lion. And she does an eye exam ASMR role play. Don't usually like ASMR role plays,

but this bitch is actually an eye doctor. And so she went and used like the actual equipment and she's like, if my eye doctor talked to me this way, my eyes could not stay open. Hello, I'm Dr. Lion. my eye doctor talked to me this way i my eyes could not stay open hello i'm dr lion and i'm going to be doing your eye exam today okay wait for the pen scratches okay all right oh i love that at distance so she talks to this person about their eye history and it's really funny too because i've heard it i literally have it memorized she's like now have you ever had any eye problems in the past any trauma to the eye oh you were hitting the eye with a baseball it's like it's so funny it's like she made up this person that got like whacked in the face with a baseball and then she's like do you have any eye um do any of your family members

have history of eye issues oh your grandmother has glaucoma i'm really sorry about that oh and your other grandma has macular degeneration it's like this poor person that is going in to have their eyes checked is it does it is not looking good for them. And you're experiencing some blur in your right eye. I'm sure it's nothing unusual, even though everyone in your family has gone blind at a very early age. But so soothing. And the guy that reacts to videos, I just found him. His name is Andrew Friedberg. Andrew Friedberg. Guitarist reacts to most viewed

guitar videos on YouTube. Guitarist reacts. So he's just like this. So the other day I was watching one of these videos and he reacted to the Taylor Swift song. Which one did he react to that he cried he cried during it he got a most oh it's called the one and the one to me it's from evermore no it's from folklore first track on folklore was not a song that i would cry about but he just starts he started he kind of he kind of goes over the songwriting and and just like the how like he just is hearing the song for the first time and i don't what is it about reaction videos like seeing someone's first reaction to something is so satisfying um do you remember but when when we were spending time with your friend bill from f boy island yes and he was saying how he's so um he he feels people's emotions so much

and he kind of emulates them. Yes. I wonder if it has something to do with just kind of feeling someone's joy or just living vicariously through someone else. Yeah, I think that's it. God damn it, Noah. I think you hit it on the head like you get to see

something you have been you're jaded to or like have it and you're getting to see it through their eyes for the first time which is also what like you and I think Kirsten even said was the reason you want to have kids is like see the world through like see things that we wouldn't be that excited about through the eyes of a child like see show children things the first time kirsten was describing like you know i was doing the kind of autistic thing i do of like why would you want kids like i don't understand it like tell me explain to me why and she's like i don't know like doing cartwheels the other day you and I were doing cartwheels and I was thinking like it would be so fun to like

teach my daughter or son like how to do a cartwheel and I was just like what's wrong with me that I that sounds like really annoying to have to do and like I I maybe will feel different if it's my own kid I've been having a lot of these moments recently Noah of like tell me what is wrong with me of like why don't I want to do things that other people do I've had this my whole life and maybe other people have it too maybe this isn't unique but I truly don't understand why people like some things. It's like that fucking, the place we stayed at in Tulum. Why would anyone pay for this? And I have to like really get reasoning behind it.

Like last night I had my friend over and he's telling me how maybe I don't need to get a roommate. Maybe I can, Andrew's room, after Andrew is gone, I can just turn it into a guest room. And he's like, that way you always have someone to stay with you like if people come in town and I'm like I hate having guests I really like Kirsten and you fine like but anyone that comes through St. Louis being like I got a place I never understand people that are like come on over to my place but like they always want to hang out whenever you're in town i i and also my friend the other day was like do you ever check like helium like um the comedy club in st louis you should check

the website like it must be cool like you get to hang out with comics like coming through town nope i have no desire because i don't want to like i don't want to do stuff is there but that's also what is there anything that you remember not liking that has changed over time maybe based off your situation someone that you know that now you do enjoy? I just, I really am jealous of people who like to be social. Even though I like to be social, but like wanting to have people stay at your house and entertain them.

I guess I just realized I'm not that type of person. There's some people that like to entertain. Their love language that they like to give to the world is like acts of service and quality time. And I'm just not that person. And that's okay. But I feel like it's such a generous thing to do. I want to be that person.

Give me an example. So with me, I was like, I don't get why people like sports. What's the point of watching sports at home? Isn't it better to go out there and just do it? Why are you watching someone else do it uh also i was just like oh people chasing a ball you know that's what dogs do and then my i've completely changed my perception of sports over the last couple of years and now i understand why people enjoy it yeah i mean i guess i could say the same thing about watching sports on tv but I

I know the feeling of wanting to be that person and like wanting to liking something because I'm putting myself in their shoes which I think is what men kind of do I'm talking about like men are generally the people who like love sports so I guess I'm just I like men are generally the people who like love sports. So I guess I'm just I and men are such so different from me in many ways that I just kind of like don't even try to understand it because I'm like they're men. Well, they're different. I know women love sports, too. I guess it's just I can see that you can be entertained by something, but I can't. I guess I'm not jealous of people who like sports.

I would like to have something like that that could just fill up my day. And like I really like like the results matter to me. And, you know, I was talking about it before. That would be kind of cool to have that. But I guess I feel like a bad person because I don't like to have guests and I don't like to entertain people. And like, if people come to St. Louis, I don't want to be like, I want to show you around town and I want to like entertain you. Like, I just, do you like having guests? It's, it's very specific, you know,

based off of like who it is. But I think that, you know, you don't have to be the same person over time. Right now, you don't enjoy having guests, but maybe in a year from now, you can enjoy it. Or you don't have to enjoy it. I think we just change over time. I think you're right. I just am kind of, I just kind of get upset with myself when I'm not, you know, like, I like, I like having a camera follow me around and i feel more comfortable in front of a camera some people are like how could you ever do that but i don't think people want that like i want to want guests i want to want to be organized i want to i'm getting i think i'm a little depressed today to be honest with you because this is my mindset when i start getting depressed I don't know about other people but when I'm depressed I feel uncomfortable in my

skin and by that I mean like I just can't I don't feel like I don't like the way I don't want to look in mirrors and things like that I start comparing myself to other women even though Instagram was shut down yesterday and saved me a couple hours of doing that. And I start getting really angry at just who I am and not like accepting it. And, you know, watching Love on the Spectrum has helped me because I feel very, I feel like I relate to these people a lot. I'm not as, you know, the issues they have are much greater than the ones I struggle with. But just, you know, there's this one girl on the second season. I forget her name, but she has short brown hair. If you're watching the show. She's the one who's dating women and men. But she's just really like loud and like talks a lot and like is really like kind of obnoxious.

And I, at first I was watching her and I was like, I can't stand, like, there's not a single character on these shows that I am ever like, ugh, less of her. But this one I was just like, no. And even the person I was watching with was kind of like, she rubbed him the wrong way too. And he didn't want to say anything because almost immediately I go, I think I really am relating to this girl a lot. Like she just could not picture herself dating anyone because they're all talking about dating

and she's just like, what? My dating history is nothing, like nothing. I don't know. I don't want to be like, it just freaks me out. Like, what do you do on a first date? Like, what do you talk to be like it just freaks me out like what do you do on a first date like what do you talk about like who says who to like do you walk in and then you just like hog or like she wants to know every little aspect and I related to it so much of just needing to know everything how could like when I asked Kirsten last week I was like when you

first started like hooking up with boys were you you nervous? And she's like, no. I just was like, I mean, maybe a little, but I just was like, oh, I'll figure it out. It's just going to happen. It just all felt natural. And that to me is not relatable. Nothing about that stuff felt natural. And I used to kind of think that maybe I had maybe some sort of sexual abuse or something that happened to me that I don't remember because I don't know that I – because why am I so awkward when it comes to sex and dating? And like why do I avoid it so much? And I always used to think, oh, maybe something happened to me when I was a baby that I don't remember.

Or I could just be – Or I could just be weird. But I do think that it's because of the more I watch Love on the Spectrum, I'm like, I think I'm a little spectrumy. And I just needed all the information before going into something. And I also just felt, I just feel like I could have probably received sort of a diagnosis back then like right now I think I'd I'd I've adapted enough and learned how to get by in life which a lot of these people in the show have like a lot of these people were like really problematic children and now they're pretty highly functioning um i don't know i just it's i think everyone likes this show i don't think i'm special and like i like it more

because i relate and i'm not trying to like say that i'm like uh on the spectrum or whatever because i'm probably not and i can't self-diagnose obviously but there's just something very soothing about seeing other people who kind of think the same way you do and I and have to figure out the same kind of like social etiquettes and like and have said really we all say awkward things and have to learn oh you don't say that like that's that's a no-no like when we're kids we say like why do you have dots all over your face and you're like then you learn like that's acne and like people feel sad about it and you shouldn't say that um but i don't know that girl if you're watching love on the spectrum that girl with the short brown hair is me she's me and guess what you watch it further and she ends up being the best i like love her now

and so did the person i was watching it he was like at first i didn't want to say anything about her because i was really annoyed and then you said that she reminded you of yourself and so i didn't want to say anything but man she sucked early on and now she's the best so maybe i'll end up being the best who knows just check in at episode seven. Let's get Andrew in here. Andrew! 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities. I'm Joel. Ooh, and I am Matt. And we're the hosts of How To Money. We want to be with you every step of the way

in your financial journey this year, offering the information and insights you need to thrive financially. Yeah, whether you find yourself up to your eyeballs in student loan debt, or you've got a sky-high credit card balance because you went a little overboard with the holiday spending, or maybe you're looking to optimize

your retirement accounts so you can retire early, well, How to Money will help you to change your relationship with money so you can stress less and grow your net worth. That's right. How to Money comes out three times a week, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, for money advice without the judgment and jargon. Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics

in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Good people, what's up? It's Questo, Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with guests you definitely don't want to miss.

Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical ever. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements and some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers. But we also love speaking to the folks who were making it happen behind the scenes and they paved the way for those that followed. You know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations like I'm Pete Bill chatting up with hit maker Sam Holland, sugar Steve chatting with the legend Nick Lowe,

and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow, Sonata Matreya, Kathleen Hanna, and The RZA. These are conversations you won't hear anywhere else. So make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, all right? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers.

I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, Minnie Questions. Over the years, we have had some incredible guests. People like Courtney Cox, star of the infinitely beloved sitcom Friends, EGOT winner Viola Davis, and former Prime Minister of the UK, Tony Blair. And now, Mini Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord We'll be right back. We want to speak out, we want to raise awareness and we want this to stop. Wow, very powerful.

I'm Ellie Flynn and I'm an investigative journalist. When a group of models from the UK wanted my help, I went on a journey deep into the heart of the adult entertainment industry. I really wanted to be a playboy, my dog. Lingerie, topless. I said, yes, please. Because at the center of this murky world is an alleged predator. You know who he is because of his pattern of behavior. He's just spinning the web for you to get trapped in it. He's everywhere and has been everywhere. It's so much worse and so much more widespread than I had anticipated. Thank you. radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts hey andrew

um i realized something yesterday when i took that picture i kept not understanding why you wouldn't turn around for the picture of you in the heels oh i didn't there was no reason yeah there yeah there is like seeing the front of your foot in heels there's a that like usually people take pictures from the front but you love your calves so much i was like oh calf boy just wanted me to capture the calves oh i thought i was like why won't this guy turn around to get a picture from the so i can get him in heels front shot. Yeah, yeah. Will you put him on again? I can't right now.

They're right over there looking at you. They are. They're saying, come on, boy. And you didn't even post my favorite picture, which was when the table sliced you in half and it looked like women's legs and then you. It almost looked like an optical illusion. That was like a brilliant piece of photography I took. I didn't even realize the genius.

And then you put a picture of a centaur that had like shutterstock written across it. I'm like, why? Just give me the, I will make you the, I know it got a lot of love, but I think it could get more. No, I think it's funny. The shutterstock. That's why it's funny. Really?

Yes. Yes. Just like you think the brilliance is in the table and the half obviously i know i was showing off the calves i felt the hook i felt the horse uh what do they call them when they're horseshoes and i didn't even relate to the the centaur like why would you pick the centaur because my upper body is way bigger than my legs ah my friend josh harnold has uh a bit about that he's on bob and tom you know the guy oh yeah yeah yeah he used to say that he looks like um one of those popsicles that you break apart and share

with a friend like his legs he goes my my legs are so because he has beautiful legs a lot like yours but he's a big guy on top and he says that i have deer I have legs that deer have admired from afar I know his well not his pain I guess the love I mean I've been told for a long time when I was in high school I remember women complimenting

because I had less hair on my legs oh yeah and girls are like God I would love to have your legs and I didn't know whether to take it as a compliment or to you know you should take it as a compliment that I uh you know you should take it as a compliment that i got drunk and made fun of your hairy legs but they were sober and it was third period so

it felt a lot well i thought you were dealing them adderall back then i did i told well that's probably why they could focus on my legs i mean i think adderall for them probably just got them high. I mean, these girls were so – I mean, it was wild. Where are they now? They're married with probably three kids and working on a divorce. And stealing their Adderall now? Stealing the kids' Adderall? Well, they probably have a prescription now. They probably like –

I don't know. It's hard to get it as – actually, it's not hard to get as an adult. I just went through – when I got prescribed those meds back in the day, I went through the most legal means so that I wouldn't be tricking anyone. Yeah. Yeah, I mean. But I think it's pretty easy to get it. There's a lot of doctors in New York where you meet them in an alley and they have a stethoscope. And you just go, oh, I can't focus.

Squirrel. Classic ADD joke. Squirrel. Classic ADD joke. Squirrel. Or in Cayman Islands, you have to change it to rooster. Because roosters are the squirrel of Cayman Islands. That's why when Robin comes to the States, she goes, oh, a squirrel. She says it, squirrel. How many syllables is that?

I don't know. She just says it so weird. But she can't even, they can't believe how many squirrels are running around i guess it is like yeah i mean if it was any other animal we get so used to these animals whatever you get used to that's why i love reaction videos to squirrels i'm just kidding that was a callback to the intro we were talking about reaction videos oh do you hate reaction videos i feel like you are someone that's like oh musician reacts to blah blah blah oh you're gonna get a channel because you react i like you are someone that's like oh musician reacts to blah blah blah oh you're gonna get a channel because you react i think you've had that attitude before i have

had that attitude before exactly um i mean to a t i mean i think you you nailed it but you were standing with your back too no here's the thing i can see your hot calves i there's guys that react to comedy videos and then people they get more credit than the comedian that's the only time like i kind of like go well this is kind of weird because they're just going oh oh shit wait rewind i don't know why reaction videos really i like it and it's almost like the same thing i say about when people go homeless people don't give them money he's out here every day and i go that would suck to be out here every day that is a job reaction videos are still to lower yourself to that fort of entertainment that like that isn't actual talent that's embarrassing kind of like that's i don't mind people doing things that

i wouldn't do look i think honestly though i i think there is talent involved in it because i have seen reaction videos can i go to your youtube recently watched i mean it's gonna be really sad i know it's gonna be golf golf golf no it's like nikki glazer podcast no way um let me see let me see no no no you let you give it to me no this is not good this is not good this is embarrassing oh no let's see you can look at mine too i'll read them i'll read them okay wait let me see that you're actually reading i swear to god i will the top ones okay no no go to history go to the button history and then make it a tower of things okay okay no wait, wait, wait. You don't get so vulnerable. Okay, so it's Nikki Glaser podcast, Nikki Glaser podcast,

Nikki Glaser podcast, Nikki Glaser podcast. Norm MacDonald on Dennis Miller Show, Norm MacDonald on O'Reilly Factor, Michael Bisping, this is UFC, my own podcast, golf, golf, golf, golf, golf. What were you watching on the Nikki Glaser podcast?

I just check in to read some comments and see how we're doing. What are you doing? I don't mind it. I don't mind. They've been positive. I don't believe you. The way you just said that has not done. They've been positive.

Yeah, it was not convincing at all. And you know, you get to read. I don't know what you're talking. They're great. Oh, my God. What's that? No, I'm just saying. Oh, just doing a wacky face?

It's like a guy trying to cover up that there's bad comments. I mean, of course there are. It's YouTube. They're very nice. I'm sure they're very nice. Anyhow. But what are you going to get there? I want to just know.

It's a new thing. This is what's going to happen. I'll tell you exactly what's going to happen. Maybe you're getting something that you actually need. I don't know. I'm asking. No. Well, one, I wanted to see how it looks, how the transitions look.

Yes. I was looking at it as like a technical standpoint to see how clear it was. I don't watch the whole thing. I literally just check in. I zoom around a little bit. But it's been, what, two weeks? Yeah. So I'm interested.

No, it makes sense. But this happens all the time with me. It's like I'll check in on something new, and then in a month from now i won't even know it's there most likely i don't you just get into something like when it first drops yeah whenever something first drops i'm really into it yeah i guess if i'm part of again i'm just having this like kind of jealousy of like i should be checking in on it too because of the same reasons of like i should i should be seeing if i like the way everything looks i should see if i um like you know i should listen my own podcast to see if i am you know because sometimes you get perspective

on yourself that when you're doing it is not enough to know like oh i sound kind of that was too long-winded try to tighten things up like i'm just so bad at reviewing myself it's hard you love it though i don't i honestly you're able to watch yourself i know but i think i think you put like this thing on me where like i i just want to see myself and consume myself i really i really don't like i really don't love it and it is hard for me especially listening to some of my sets or with stand-up i guess the more time i put into something running it to your stand-up clip as soon as they send it to us sometimes like you want to see oh yeah i don't mind that stuff i don't you you need like a a buffer even with photos are you kidding me a buffer i really struggle with my stand-up i have i'm not joking i have a um

i have a real problem with my with posting my stand-up. I had Ari, our friend, make me a bunch of TikTok clips of my stand-up, paid him lots of money to do it, and they're just sitting there because I don't want to look at it. Why not just post it blind? Because then it might be real bad. I think it... But you picked the clips. No, I didn't. I just said, hey, go look at my Seth Meyers one. You want me to look at it might be real bad. I think it, you know, but you picked the clips. No,

I didn't. I just said, Hey, go look at my set. Look at it and be, no, because I don't respect your opinion when it comes to my standup because I have,

I have a higher bar with my own stuff and you, you could see myself and be like, that was great. But I, I just, I, I'm not as good as I want to be, I guess.

And I, and I, there's nothing that I'm going to do. That's as good as I want to be, I guess. And there's nothing that I'm going to do that's as good as I want to be. Even in my roast things that are like arguably as good as I could do anything and have gotten me the most success. I have many issues with them and I just can't. I don't know what it is. I really. Well, you're a perfectionist in a lot of ways or close to it.

But when I listen back to this podcast, when we were getting this podcast when I had that awful night on Reddit and I went back to just hear, God, am I just as much of a monster as these people are saying? And I went back and I listened and I was listening at like two times or a time and a half the speed. Oh, a fast monster. Yeah. Scarier. Oh my God.

No monsters are ever fast fast they're always like i know imagine if jason could run a good marathon like jason yeah because he could just walk fast which is a talent a limp though yeah there's they always have like a limp like no monsters ever run really fast you had a walking dead it's not the it's not the running dead dead. Yeah. It'd be so much scarier, but I guess the movie would be shorter. Yeah, what if Frankenstein, the monster, was like Usain Bolt in his head? See what I did there? I loved it. Thanks.

It took a little math in my brain, and I wasn't listening to you for the past 2.5 seconds, but I had to figure out how to present that joke. I can feel you computing in your head. Computer. Computer. I just thought of Usain Bolt. He's the fastest man alive. Oh, the word bolt could be funny if you work it into a monster thing.

What monster has a bolt in it? Oh, Frankenstein has a bolt in his head. Then maybe if you say, computer, joke computer. Give me another topic. I'll do a joke computer. A joke computer. Give me another topic. I'll do a joke computer. A joke computer? Yeah.

Diet Coke. Wait, what am I? What are the two? We have to have two connective things. Diet and Coke. Diet Coke, but give me a monster. Diet Coke and- Two subjects.

That's pretty much what jokes are, is taking one thing, taking another thing, and common thing between it okay let's try to do it why doesn't noah do it and then we'll go yeah no two different things this could be a new segment called joke computer it's time for this is your joke computer so two two random things it could be like concepts and like an object. Like the way we just did it with monsters and speed. Okay. So it'd be like, oh, okay. If a monster ran fast, he would be Usain Bolt, Frankenstein Bolt.

Yeah. I mean, that was such a good one to start with. But I think we can do it again. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Chalkboard and I don't know, a swimming pool? Oh, great.

Okay. Chalkboard and swimming pool. Chalkboard and swimming pool. Okay. Okay. I also may have not understood the rules. No, no, no. This is great.

This is great. A chalkboard and a swimming pool. So, okay, can I just walk you through my computer brain yeah okay i'm thinking of chalkboard and like nails on a chalkboard so a lot of people say that nails on a chalkboard is the worst sound in the world um you know what uh the uh um nails you know what the um nails down a um uh okay i kind of this is very loose and very stupid okay you know are you talking about you do you know what my least favorite sound like if you're talking about nail chalkboards and and um swimming pools okay that's pretty good what i? I combined two things. What did you do? Loose and stupid.

Loose and stupid. Oh, yeah. Okay, that was pretty good. Okay. This was your joke, computer. No, go ahead. So, yeah. Do you know what my least favorite sound is?

Nails on a chalkboard? No. Nails at the bottom of the swimming pool when kids jump in and then they scream because it stabs their feet. I don't know. Okay, the edge is here. The edge showed up. Maybe you shouldn't watch this one back. No, okay, I got one.

I got one. Hey, Ari, can you quote that? No, wait, wait, wait. Hold on. That one sucked, but I'm getting closer okay you know what my least favorites like speaking of um oh my god i know we were talking about um swimming pools and chalkboards yeah you know what my least favorite sound is what could it be um it's uh um nails uh wait it has to be nails the sound The sound of... Oh, my God.

Now that we're talking about chalkboards and swimming, this has nothing to do with one of these things, but you know what my least favorite sound is? What's that? Like children drowning. That's good. I like that. That's a good misdirection.

There we go. See, what I had to do was start with, I know that one of them doesn't make sense. No, I had to do the misdirect of like, this doesn't fit one of the things we were just talking about, which you don't know, which you're assuming it's going to be the swimming pool that it doesn't fit

because everyone's least favorite sound is nails on a chalkboard. But then I said children drowning. That was your computer, Joe. Joe computer. Let's get to the news. Shall we? We shall. You heard it here first.

You heard it here first. Yeah, you heard it here first. I hope you're having all the swells. It's Tuesday, but hey, it's Friday in our hearts. Maybe. Probably not. Okay, I hope you're having all the swells, though. I don't know if I already said it, but boy, I hope you do.

Okay, a woman said her jean shorts gave her a wedgie so tight that she ended up in the ICU with a life-threatening sepsis. She went on a date. She was wearing jean shorts. She didn't want to say anything. They were uncomfortable, so she left them on for hours. Next thing you know, she wakes up with a bump the next day, and she to go luckily what was the bump caused from friction yeah friction and then it was like a then she had like a an open sore that led to infection yeah and it developed both cellulitis

and a bacterial skin infection you don't want the word cellulite in whatever disease not only are you going to die but you're fat dying um so she got well this checks out i mean i've had i've had issues where you know i had a thong spanks on one time at the mtv awards and it cut up my vagina it was it was the most pain i've ever didn't cut it up but it was slicing me up the front. So it had this really tight band at the top holding it up. So it was a tight band holding the Spanx part on. And then a thong.

And it just rode up the whole night. I was bullying myself. I was giving myself a wedgie. I was like, give me your lunch money. Where you wouldn't take your underwear off. I was wearing a pencil skirtgie. It was like, I was like, give me your lunch money. Where were you wearing, where you wouldn't take your underwear off? I was wearing a, like a pencil skirt that went all the way down. So it was really tight and I couldn't reach up the skirt to then pull it out. But at one point I did. We were at the MDV. I

could, I was sitting next to Sarah, Nikki and Sarah live, co-host. And I was like, Sarah, I can't do this. Zac Efron is literally within shouting distance. I'm like in heaven. We're sitting next to the Jersey Shore. We're like third row at the MDV Awards. It's so fun. And I am in blinding pain from this fucking thong. So I had to like pull up my skirt and then reach in and hook the thong and just pull it so much to pull it down.

But honestly, it didn't even help because nothing can pull that spanks the spanks is so tight it was so far up and the dress was so tight it was it was torture i mean it was so painful but you weren't nervous about zach i guess that's the brightness like like you know what i mean like there's something interesting about your anxiety going down because you're dealing with your pussy falling apart. Yeah, pain can trump. That's why they tell you to grab. Have you ever grabbed?

If you're having a panic, grab this as tight as you can, and there's a pain right there. That's the headache pressure point. Oh, is that too? Yeah, they always do that to relieve headaches. They hold it there. Oh. Yeah, because pain, when you get pain it just it distracts you yeah yeah so i mean i guess if you're meeting your heroes cut up your genitalia maybe that might help i

mean like we whenever you're um i've embarrassed myself so many times of like feeling anxious and like angry about something and then i blow up in front of like a bunch of people i just met like i don't know people following me around with cameras and I get to some place late. Cause I'm already running late. And then I get there and they're running 30 minutes behind. And I'm like, could someone have texted me that?

Like I have like an attitude and it's like, my reaction is coming from pain. You know, like I, if I was in like a not stressed out way, I would just go, Oh, next time.

Can you guys let me know? But instead like, yeah, when you, you you but that's why you get what you want though too i think like yeah i mean well we were talking about it yesterday but we were talking about it yesterday about like women i don't know i heard this thing where women get paid less because they're more agreeable to men whatever but i feel like you you put your foot down when you feel like you deserve something i mean it took me a while to learn that but it really the fact that you're even commenting that i do it means that it's like people know you're kind of a cunt like that no no yes what are you talking about no you're right like what i'm saying is not a cunt that's the problem

is people will me being but the what i what i was referring to when i was really stressed out that day i had the show i remember that night when i got there and i was just like hey um i i really value like i don't like waiting when i get to places and i could have been at home working on my set and like just this tone of like was not did not get me anything what would have gotten me something is presenting that same thing of like hey I really love like I don't like waiting it's a weird thing about me next time can you just like let me know as soon as you like just being gentler about it instead I had to kind of have a snippy attitude that made this kid working for me probably scared of me and then creates a barrier between me and him which leads to him resenting

me i mean we a lot of us fear our bosses or people that work above us and i don't think that makes for the best work environment like you might get your i think we're we've it's been proven that positive reinforcement is much better than negative now i guess it's your time like you know you tend to like to get to places right on time so if you're doing that and then there's a delay it's like a double whammy to you i feel like but what goes on through your head where it's like maybe just for a second be like oh i could just sit down and chill and i could go over my set right here i feel like it's a um my that i'm not being taken care of and that um i'm working with people like because that day was so i just felt that was a very i just i didn't have any time to even look at a single set list or build something

and that day i i could have walked to Luigi for that extra half hour. And there was nowhere for us to go either. And like, wait, it was just like, go to your car and wait or go. And I just, I,

I have so much in my life. And if things aren't running, like boom, boom, boom, I can't, I can't keep up with this life and, and people won't be able to work for me.

Cause I'll stop doing other people will lose work because of it but my point was that i i'm fine with things running like i run late so often i really do i'm turning into a late person but that as long as i always let people know as soon as i know i'm going to be late so my problem wasn't like we're running 30 minutes late this is not okay that's fine i just want to know that if you knew we were running late 10 minutes ago even 10 minutes late and then it got to 30 like just let me know as soon as you know you're running late because then i can stay at home and wait yeah but i guess they probably assumed we already left at that point because it was the

truck but then i would just go get starbucks or drive around you know yeah i don't want to wait to so whatever yeah there's something that's oh i'm sorry it's kind of like what nikki was saying in the opening which you didn't hear about um needing to have information so i think that you make the most of the information like what you were saying about making use of your time knowing where the day is gonna go right and like exactly the minutes and when we're gonna be done i was talking to a pa on the show who picked me up to go to dinner and she had a long day and i go when is your day over and she goes oh i don't know and i go does that bother you that you don't know that there's not like an end time and she's like no not really

i kind of just like go till we go and i'm like man i i always need to know like that's what's been a big problem for me using the book noah has been uh relinquishing control to men and being like you plan the date you you decide where we're going to the restaurant you drive because i i really used to get bothered when people would be like we'd walking in this down down the street in New York and it'd be like, oh, we're going to this restaurant. And they won't tell me where it is. It's like a weird control thing. They'll be like, you don't need to know. We'll get there.

And then I'm like, but I want to know when we're turning right. Like, I want to know I'm going to turn right up here. I don't want to know that I'm turning right when you suddenly turn right and I'm still walking forward. But what is the, is it the embarrassment? What is it? What's the, it's just control of it?

I guess I just need to know the plan. I just like to know the plan. It's just, I don't know. I like to know when I'm going to be done. If someone doesn't share, like the other day when they didn't tell you the van was running late or whatever,

I think what happens is people don't want to upset the other person so they withhold information that might be negative and then it's going to come up eventually yeah we all do that so it's like do you want to get hit now and later or hit i don't know it's just an interesting um because the person has it's funny when you have someone's uh best interest in mind but something's keeping you from um satisfying them but and they're still upset with you but you're like but i really was just thinking about you and helping you yeah but i just came up short so doesn't that count as something i don't know i mean that's when i've said to people like oh i never am trying to make you mad like all i'm trying to do is do the right thing and yet i still get in the end up upsetting you but you know i think that that i have to remember that too and i know when you're saying somebody you mean me and you you mean you wait when when like when you're saying like you're trying to

do something right and the person i honestly wasn't thinking okay i was thinking jack harlow i was thinking jack harlow call back ham drip ham drip no it's it's actually thinking of brenna in that instance actually yeah i've like yeah yeah i think that happens a lot in relationships of you get your partner gets mad at you and you're like – I mean I can only think of one time in my past relationship where I actually tried to do something that would like get under his skin. Because I was always getting like – I felt like he would get upset with me about things that I was like, I didn't mean to do that. So there was no way I would just do something intentionally, but I think there was one time I did. Do you know,

can you say or no? No, I've already like, and it was an ugly moment, but I just always, I said, I can admit that that was a one time, but I promise you,

I don't do that. So like, but I, I have to remember that too. You know, like you're never, maybe some days you get upset with me and you try to do something that might like get under my skin. Like we too you know like you're never maybe some days you get upset with me and you try to do something that might like get under my skin like we've

done that we do that to each other and i i still that do that to people but generally when you get mad at someone they didn't mean they don't want you unless they're doing it maliciously but then it's so hard if the person the perth jack harlow gets upset no no but, like if the person gets upset at you and you're trying to do the right thing. So it's hard to apologize when you're not purposely doing something. So then you go, well, I can't say I'm sorry because it wasn't intentional. But sometimes you should just say sorry, even if it is. Yeah, you don't say sorry. You just, well, you can say sorry, but you can say, I'm sorry that it made you feel that way.

And in the future, I will try my best to do blah, blah, blah. I think that's the best approach. I don't know. No, no, that's great. Let me go to this one. Okay. Von Versen and Marie Antoinette. Von Versen?

Yeah, that was her friend. So the Queen of France, the wife of king louis the oh shit 10th what are we looking at what are the numbers xv1 12th no i'm gonna let you get don't help him 10 16 16 good job okay Tom Brady III. Okay. Exchanged a handful of secretive letters over the span of a year in the late 18th century during the French Revolution. Beloved, madly, and tender friend are among the censored words.

So these two were like friends, but there was definitely more going on there? Yeah. Scientists recently uncovered lines that were crossed out in these notes that they would send to each other that's insane that they were just like let's look at let's maybe go back to those crossed out lines i know but i mean that would probably be where some dirt is i was hoping that andrew would read some of the phrases in the headline oh i did below madly no no no tender friend in the headline that i gave you in the red one oh i'm so sorry um just don't do it again try better next time

is that science sorry i'm trying to read you know i can't do nine things at once or one uh scientists recently uncovered reading a sentence is that nine words at once or one uh scientists recently uncovered reading a sentence is that nine words at once is there's big words in here it's all french okay so read the phrase and then the quotation okay scientists recently uncovered in a series of secret letters okay rumor lovers swedish calendar okay mad mad tendre ame ami or my tender friend it's the front he's gonna read the french and then let me try to translate it okay mad tendre ami i think everything's a question my tender friend yes uh na pa san vu uh i i am without you yeah not without you yeah oh yeah okay well we stumbled on a fun little new thing here where i read french that actually is a fun thing and i didn't do that bad though i knew

no no no you did i just read you were reading it phonetically and i i mean i'm terrible at a language that i don't know but that one I kind of know how to pronounce. So how do you, do you say the S's? Ne pas. Ne pas. Ne. So you don't pronounce the second N? Ne pas.

Wait, it's. N-O-N-P-A-S. Oh, non pas. Yeah. Non pas. N-O-N. Non. Non.

Non. Non. Non. No, nope. And then pas. No. No. Nope. And then pas is like. Qu'est-ce que c'est? Non pas, I guess, is not. Or.

Oh, so you don't pronounce the S at the end of pas. No, no, no. No. No. It's not. No. No. No.

Sans. Sans. Again, no S. No S. What the fuck are the N's doing here? N-Y-S-S at the end. Sans. And voy.

Voy. V-O-U-S? Yeah. Vu. Vu. Como te hables tu the end. Sans. And vous. Vous. V-O-U-S? Yeah. Vous. Vous. Comment t'appelles-tu? Yeah. Ah, ooh.

Do you remember that song? No. Je m'appelle Andrew. Je suis des Florida. Comment t'appelles-tu? And Niki. What song is that? That's just the only thing I remember from French.

Okay, so these two were... They were canoodling we believe but it was crossed out by him right correct yes with like a different she wrote it in copper he crossed it out in iron which so it's hard to like take off it was like this whole thing but like whenever i crossed out like whenever i don't want people to read that if i write a note or something and i'm like oh shit i don't want them to see what i even wrote out i don't cross it out because i learned early on that when you just like write um you just scratch it out with a horizontal line anything that's curvy curvy will show up you can really find it so i would write over it i fucked this up i fucked this up and i would write

i would write jumbly letters over it so then it gets all mixed up and you can't even source the normal. So you just write slurs over something negative. Yeah, that makes sense. How do you feel about me replacing the N-word in every song that has it in it when I'm running with Nikki?

It still doesn't feel kosher. It doesn't feel good, right? Yeah yeah maybe do a word that's no i don't do anything i usually just skip it and i just do a you know uh uh once upon a time and i heard that i was ugly came from a bitch who want to fuck with me or whatever and then you just say nikki want to fuck with me yeah it sounds a little uh like you're talking i'm more upset that it's a third person no i'm not saying it because it just it's a way to say something and it's two syllables uh like that because sometimes that word actually makes it's not that it's the meaning of it makes it sound better or like this i don't like the sound of it but it just a blank sounds weird

yeah um i'm not going to do it but it occurred to me because i i recently um thought of a good idea like because i like to find there's always nickies that come to my shows there's always so many oh my god i thought you were doing something else oh no no, no. I was not replacing it there. Please. No, there's girls named Nikki that come to my show. Yes. Right? Yes. And the other night I was asking if any were in the room and I said, where are my Nikki's at?

And I was like, oh, that sounds funny because I'm not asking the other thing that sometimes I think people, that's like a common thing. Yes. But it sounded funny. There's a left turn within the word. Exactly. It got a laugh, but I felt like, that's like a common thing. Yes. But it sounded funny. There's a left turn within the word. Exactly.

It got a laugh, but I felt like, is that inappropriate? I think I remember hearing it and almost feeling a little uncomfortable, but I shouldn't be. It shouldn't be. And then I go, yeah, where are they at? And then, yeah. So I think that I hate that word so much that I feel like even flirting with it or messing around with the fact that it sounded like it makes me uncomfortable and should make others uncomfortable.

When I hear N-word, though, I think Nikki. I appreciate that. That's how angry I am. And I'm glad that we're changing that. Here's the thing. With Marie Antoinette, isn't it interesting, though, when someone dates a king and then they have a lover that you don't think about it as cheating. You think about it like, good for her.

She's getting rid of getting, you know. Yeah, because he had so many wives that he like beheaded and stuff. So kind of like, get yours, bitch. We're always like, you go, girl. Yeah, you let it slide when your head is sliding down into the town square. No one talks about that. Princess Diana cheated? Yeah.

Yeah, good for her. No, I know. Charles never loved her, and the reason that he married her was because she came from a good family, and Camilla's didn't, and he always loved Camilla. And, like, she was – she – he – yeah. Her wedding day, she looks miserable. She looked miserable.

I mean, I don't know really much about her at all, but I referenced her death the other night and people groaned in the audience. I love doing that now. It's this new thing I've been doing on stage and it's not, I will not, where my Nikki's at is kind of funny to me. I don't think replacing the N word

with Nikki in songs is appropriate and I will not be doing that and don't cancel me for that. However, I've been doing this thing on stage that I think is really fun, which is you reference a tragic death. You just reference it, which just... With no punchline? No, no, no.

It fits into, say I'm doing a punchline. I think one night I was doing a punchline about... I don't know. I was talking about... You know what i was talking about oh i was talking about how prince harry is the perfect man and i have this whole kind of thesis that i present because he has his mom died young and he she when you lose your mom before you realize she is a flawed human you always like um put your mom on a pedestal for the rest of your life thus you

and men's men's like whole opinions of women are kind of based on their moms and so when you realize your mom sucks at some point because you get old enough to be like oh my mom might be flawed you can't you don't really put that on her because she's your mom but you end up marrying someone who reminds you of your mom and then you hate that woman for all the things that you really hate your mom for because you are allowed to hate your wife. You're not allowed to hate your mom. That's my theory. And I say that most men that lost their mom before their mom –

before they were old enough to hate their mom thus love women the rest of their life. We've got to go to break, and I'll come back and finish this thought after that. 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities. I'm Joel. Oh, and I am Matt. And we're the hosts of How To Money. We want to be with you every step of the way in your financial journey this year, offering the information and insights you need to thrive financially. Yeah, whether you find yourself up to your eyeballs in student loan debt, or you've got a sky-high credit card balance because you went a little overboard with the holiday spending, or maybe you're looking to optimize your retirement accounts so you can retire early, well, How to Money will help you to change your relationship with money

so you can stress less and grow your net worth. That's right. How to Money comes out three times a week, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for money advice without the judgment and jargon. Listen to how to money on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Catch John Stewart back in action on the daily show and in your ears with the daily show ears edition podcast from his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now plus you'll get special content just for podcast listeners like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines listen on the iheart radio appio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions?

Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, Minnie Questions. Over the years, we have had some incredible guests. People like Courtney Cox, star of the infinitely beloved sitcom Friends, EGOT winner Viola Davis, and former Prime Minister of the UK, Tony Blair. And now, Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions,

including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Each episode is a new person's story with new lessons, new memories, and new connections to show us how we're both similar and unique. Listen to Mini Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Good people, what's up? It's Questo, Questlove.

And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with guests you definitely don't want to miss. Now of the things i love about this quest love supreme podcast is we got something for everybody every type of musical effort we enjoy speaking to the people who were the face of some movements some people you've seen on stage or tv or magazine covers but we also love speaking to the folks who were making it happen behind the scenes, and they paved the way for those that followed. You know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations,

like I'm Pete Bill chatting up with hitmaker Sam Holland, sugar Steve chatting with the legend Nick Lowe, and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow, Sonata Matreya, Kathleen Hanna, and The RZA. These are conversations you won't hear anywhere else. So make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, alright? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the

iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. We want to speak out, we want to raise awareness, and we want this to stop. Wow, very powerful. I'm Ellie Flynn, and I'm an investigative journalist. When a group of models from the UK wanted my help,

I went on a journey deep into the heart of the adult entertainment industry. I really wanted to be a player boy model. Lingerie, topless. I said, yes, please. Because at the centre of this murky world is an alleged predator. You know who he is because of his pattern of behaviour. He's just spinning the web for you to get trapped in it. He's everywhere and has been everywhere.

It's so much worse and so much more widespread than I had anticipated. Together, we're going to expose him and the rotten industry he works in. It's not just me. We're an army in comparison to him. Listen to The Bunny Trap on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. so my point about the princess diany thing is i i actually came up with this whole theory while watching a documentary with prince harry and prince william and it really struck me the whole documentary the way they talked about women and their wives and just women in general and women's rights like i'm not even joking you i was kind of like easy boys yeah we're not that great like I was kind of like why do they love women so much and I was like oh my god it's because they had not only

an amazing mom but they lost her before they could go through that phase of I hate you you know like maybe Prince William a little bit more when it was a teenager but you know harry was still a little baby who was like mommy and so he's never going to have the same kind of he might have abandonment issues with women that they might die suddenly and so i said i pretty much and i also state that if a man loses his mom early on in his life he's forced into therapy by um the school system because like you know you don't really have a choice and so you're working on yourself so you're working on yourself early age and i don't want boys to lose their moms but i the best men i think are men with good moms that lose them young and then they always think women are amazing and i said megan markle i think has

the best man ever she has the best life i go yeah maybe he's a little paranoid about driving through tunnels and that's the joke I made is like but it's true I bet you anything he's a lot more protective of her and tragedy and things that could happen to her which is probably annoying for her to be like babe I'm just going to get coffee I'm not gonna well I mean he literally moved are you wearing your seatbelt babe and she's like's like, yes, hon. I could see that being. He moved because she was suicidal. He was protecting her. Which is, in the end, a good thing. But I make the joke that it's a joke, but it's not a joke.

I bet he doesn't like to go fast in cars. He's not taking risks in cars that other people might take because he lost his mother that way. So I say that it might be, I go, Meghan Markle has the best life. I said, it might be annoying, you know, it takes like 15 more minutes to get somewhere

because he doesn't want to go on a highway and go through some tunnels. And that's just in reference to Princess Diana dying in a tunnel. And people go, oh, and I go, you guys know I didn't do it,

right? Yeah. Like I didn't, I didn't kill her, right? That was the royal family that did that. But I, no, that's my own.

But you can see why he hates the press too. The press killed his mom. The paparazzi killed his mom. Yeah, but when people groan at the mere mention of, remember I have the joke about having a hotel, that you helped me write, the hotel room. Oh, yeah. Let's say you honestly wrote it, but you gave me the line of,

when I go to check into a hotel room, the best's say you honestly wrote it but you gave me the line of um when i go to check into a hotel room the best hotel rooms always have a scale and like a magnifying mirror with a light on it and and i'm always like this is like really these two things i've are never made me feel better about myself what and i go they gave me uh two hair dryers one for my hair and one for the bath i go what did I get the Bourdain bungalow so I and I say they you know the the little note notepad on the desks is says final thoughts at the top and I go I don't know what they're trying to do and um and people when I say Bourdain bungalow people go oh and I go um he killed himself you guys know that like obviously

you know that um do you know I didn't what are you groaning out that i made that it's a part of a joke they hear that it's it's not even so much i hate to be autistic about it but it's i'm i'm referencing a thing that happened it's the celebrity name people react to celebrity names but they're groaning because it was a tragic thing like i don't like in our society that if something traumatic or tragic happens we have to act like it didn't happen that That's what they're asking us to do. It's not like, don't put it in a joke that people might laugh. It's just, do we just go on

and we act like it didn't happen like my parents do with my anorexia? I just can't. I don't like to. That's why I hate. You're mad that that's what I groan at? I think I bristle at this stuff. Yeah, yeah. I just hate denial. I see what I groan at? I think I bristle at this stuff. Yeah, yeah.

No, but. I just hate denial. I see what you're saying, but I think like, first of all, groan is reaction. So that could be a positive, negative reaction. I mean, it used to be the only reaction I got on stage. I used to get, literally go on stage for five minutes from the time I started in 2003 until 2006. All I got were groans but i think those groans the difference between a groan and a laugh sometimes is just how you say it and how you confident you are about it like you could

be confident about a really dark joke and if you say it in a light way with confidence people will laugh but if you say it like tentatively maybe that when you're starting yeah they're gonna groan and feel like bad for you sometimes it's just people don't it i'm i'm being a little bit love on the spectrum about it but you're you're grown groaning suggests that i've done something wrong but but mere mentioning the fact that princess diana died in a tunnel and referencing that fact for a bit that is about that is actually probably factual, that Harry is probably more protective. It's not doing it.

I'm not doing anything wrong by doing that. Is it wrong to maybe have a tragic death referenced in the context of a comedy show? Perhaps, but. I don't know. Can I chime in as a person who most likely reacts like, oh, I think for me who most likely reacts like, oh. I think for me, it's just like when I listen to comedians, the way that they can connect these things is astounding.

I can't ever do that. So for me, it's just more like a surprise, not really anything negative. It's a surprise sound. You're right. And like i said before comedy is surprise that's why we laugh is because we're a little scared we're like and we grit we bare our teeth because you know evolutionarily that would scare off predators so when we get surprised by a saber-toothed tiger we go and we laugh with my teeth i went to the

dentist today and talked about you uh are they ready for me uh orthodontist so no she said does he need invisalign i go i don't know that he would be if i'm not good enough to wear the trays 22 hours a day i can't i don't know if your boy would be my buddy got adult braces the other day and they're like i love calling them adult they're like oh yeah they're like metal metal like like they look like they were designed in the early 1800s. That's what he went with. It was wild because he broke his jaw. He got his jaw broken in a bar fight.

What? A friend that is your age? Oh, my God. Got hit and knocked out and jaw broken. And then his jaw had to rewire. But because his jaw was broken, his teeth started to grow and croak. Right. He had to rewire but because his jaw was broken his teeth started growing crooked right now you had to get like full-on like metal i'm getting ready to do that too i went to i have if if anyone out there has done invisalign get buckle your fucking seat

belts for what i have been through i could i did not realize this so when you get invisalign you get sets of trays that come in groups of seven to 20 trays. And each one you wear for seven to nine days. So each batch is nine to 25 weeks. And you usually get through an entire treatment within one to to three batches all right i have been through oh my god 24 batches of invisalign and then i almost started crying time out time out most people get healed within one to three one to three and i've been through 24 and i'm not joking you i asked her to pull up the image from the first scan i got before I got these Invisalign.

And now, and I had the cameras there today too, by the way. So Ailey was there and saw it, witnessed it. Such good content. And there was no difference. Andrew, I'm not even kidding you. It is so sad. I'm really upset about it, but we got to get to our Reddit dump. 24 is wild.

This is your Reddit dump. And I'm going in again, baby. I'm getting my 25th in two weeks. Why not just get permanent braces for six months? That's what I said. And they go, you don't want braces. And I go, yes, I do, bitch. Yes, I do.

I think it'd be hilarious to have braces. How funny would it be to have braces? Dude, if you had rubber bands, like green and red or something. Oh, my God. I'd love it. Okay. So let's go through my Reddit dump to show you what I've been up to lately. God, there's a really good one on here that I can't wait to share with you.

What the fuck? Hold on one second. Oh, that's my own account. I go, where did all of my things go? All right. Okay, so. Oh, this one. This one kind of got me bummed out.

This one was explain like I'm five. That's where people ask questions that they're like, can you just explain this in a really easy way? How a person dies from severe burns. Do you know? When I was a kid, I always heard the term they died burns do you know when i was a kid i always heard the term they died from shock which to me was a catch-all term for a ton of trauma but mechanically speaking what is preventing someone from continuing on do you know the answer to this

i know but i know that burn alive is like the worst way to die yeah well you don't die quick burns cause the body to fight and overuse energy to heal we need to place them on tons of devices that regulate everything in their body and allow them to heal older people that can die because their bodies can fail quicker and easier so pretty much um burns become a systemic issue they cause your body depending on the total body surface that is burned to start to fail um yeah so it takes a lot of energy to like deal with burns yeah so your body doesn't only has a certain amount of energy and it drains your battery i guess would be and then your organs probably shut down yes oh so you're talking about like a burn you get burnt you're

saved and then then you die not like burn then you die like that too i think oh like your body is freaking out so much from the burns like and trying to heal them and go and i guess i don't know that just there's questions like that that i go oh my god yeah i don't know why people die from burns even i would go as far as to say i don't know how people die from cancer it's always weird to me when someone is like you know norm mcdonald like you know this last thing what was it, a couple months before he died? We can call my dad. I mean, I would like to understand that.

Maybe not now, but I am going to make you do a call really soon here on this Reddit dump. So get ready to call one of your best friends. So today I learned about the garden path sentences, someone says. This is in Today I Learned. Someone says, this isn't today I learned. Which are garden path sentences, which are grammatically correct sentences that confuse the reader by making them parse the sentence incorrectly initially. So when you first read it, you're like, this isn't a real sentence. But in the end, it ends up being an actual grammatically correct sentence. Examples include the old man, the boat. The old man, the boat.

You read the old man first, and then you read the boat. The old man, the boat. You read the old man first, and then you read the boat, but it's the old man, the boat. Man being, like man operate. The old man, the boat. I was thinking it was a man named the boat, like a nickname. Okay, try it about that. Well, that wouldn't be a sentence because that would be a fragment because it's just that. Oh, yeah, that's not a phrase. Yeah.

Okay, so try this one. The horse raced past the barn fell. That would be a fragment because it's just that. Oh, yeah. That's not a full song. Yeah. Okay. So try this one. The horse raced past the barn fell. The horse raced past the barn fell. The horse. The horse raced past the barn fell. Oh, barn fell is like the barn didn't actually fall. No, you're not even close.

Okay. This one took me a while. Is it French? No, what about when I say it like this? The horse raced past the bar. Oh, wait. The horse raced past the barn fell. Fell is what's getting me here.

Right, right. These are sentences that confuse you. So it's the horse that was raced past the barn. So we don't say that. You know how sometimes you could say, Andrew, Nikki's co-host. Yes. Or you could say, Andrew, who is Nikki's co-host?

We take out the who is. Yeah. If you said the horse that raced, the horse that raced, or you could say the horse, the horse raced, the horse, who was raced past the barn.

I get all of that until fell though. Fell, he fell. The horse that was raced past the barn. I get all of that until Fell, though. Fell. He fell. The horse that was raced past the barn fell. Shit. This is like that Buffalo Buffalo. Yeah, but Fell is so far away from horse. Let's get into final thought.

This is the one that I was excited for you to do. So this one was in. Man, I'm dumb. No, you're not at all. This was confusing. And I didn't do you any favors by trying to say it okay so this one um oh wait a second i just want to quickly read this one today i learned this one says today i learned it only takes the average person 10 to 20 minutes

to fall asleep what the fuck why you think it should take longer i mean i i feel like most people struggle to fall asleep actually maybe that maybe that checks out okay so this is from humans being bros is the one that i we're gonna i'm gonna be excited to to use okay i kind of want you to face no don't facetime because they'll know you're on air okay and this has to be okay so this said humans being bros this is just like lovely stories of humans being good people this one says um this is a guy going up to his friend on the street this is a tiktok he goes up to his this guy is interviewing people in the street and he goes up to this really cute black guy yeah on the street

i think this is in maybe london or something we'll see but um just listen to this do you tell your male friends that you love them yeah i do would you be willing to call one of them up right Just listen to this. So he says, my brother. Thank you for the call. No problem, man. That's it. I'm going to hit you up later, probably. Okay. Bless you, son. We love that, man.

Brotherly love right there. Who should I call? Pick the friend. Okay. I'll do anyone. Who's the friend that, do you say I love you to your friends? Okay. Ari.

Rusty? Ari? Let's Ari, because he'll just say, fuck you. I bet Ari will just be like, what's this for? I know, but I think Rusty? Ari? Let's Ari because he'll just say, fuck you. I bet Ari will just be like, what's this for? I know, but I think Rusty will be, why don't we do Rusty first because I think Rusty. And just go, hey, do it the exact same way. Like, hey, what's going on? Hey, I just want to say I love you. He reached the voicemail. He just texted me. I'm'm gonna call right now i'll call you back as soon as i can i love you baby no he didn't no he didn't okay uh try ari man you fucking suck rusty i don't love you anymore

i don't know if you ever did no you do love. Do you really say I love you to your guy friends? I'm trying to think. I think I've said it to Ari before. Yeah, I really do. I do say it. But don't say it right away. Be like, hey, what's up? Say, I just want to say I love you.

Why am I laughing? Come on, Ari. Come on. No whammies. No whammies. Pick up. I got to call you back in five minutes. No, no, Ari. Come on. No whammies. No whammies. Pick up. I got to call you back in five minutes. No, no, no.

I just want to... Hey, what's up? What's up? I just wanted to talk to you for a second. I just wanted to say I love you. Love you, too. All right. I'll talk to you then soon.

Are you okay? Yeah, I'm all right. Thanks for checking in, though, on me after I'll talk to you then soon. Are you okay? Yeah, I'm all right. Thanks for checking in on me after I said I love you. Am I, like, being punked? I mean, kind of. Sorry, Ari. Are we on a podcast? Yeah, we're just checking to see what happens when Andrew calls and says I love you to friends.

I mean, I'm from the camp where friends tell friends they love them. I know. I love that you said it right away and then you checked in on him because you realize how weird it is for him to just say that out of the blue that you had to do a wellness check. Yeah, because Andrew, like, the only time I think he'll ever say I love you Is if he's like standing on the edge of a bridge You're so right I love that about you Alright we love you Ari I love you baby

Okay so the other day I got a call I got a text from Josh Arnold The guy that I was talking about Popsicle legs He just wrote me out of the blue We hadn't talked since july 6th he had not texted me okay oh man thursday september 23rd he wrote just a quick thank you for making me laugh so much over the years and he's the guy that runs a little depressed and so i was like Josh I love you so much I hope this is is I go I hope this is

a is an a suicide text I go isn't isn't so I actually said is and he goes ha ha ha not at all I said oh good I love you and this text made me happy um he said I was just thinking about you and how you're one of my favorite people and genuinely wanted to thank you so sweet I mean there is something too I think but it really scared scared me. When we're just really, like, I think we both run on sincerity. Or at least for me, I'll say. Like, sincere isn't usually on the top of my head. So when I am sincere. On the top of my head.

Yeah, it's just a figment. And I just feel like, ham drip. That, like, I just feel like when I am sincere and i do tell like i like hearing i love you from someone that i wouldn't expect it and that means so much to me because some people will say it's so willy-nilly so it just feels good but then again it's like you said it to me the other night when we were going on stage maybe yeah yeah and you were coming on stage oh yeah when i was coming on stage you were like i love When I was coming on stage, you were like, I love you. That was really nice. And I don't think I said it back. But I wanted to say, in closing. No, who said I love you to me?

I do love you. No, it feels like nails in a swimming pool. No. Who said it to me recently that I was so excited about? Someone was like, I love you. And I was just like. Emile? Emile and I have said I love you for a while. say i love you to ari too i heard it i i do a lot love ari yeah i love

a lot of people i feel like and and i think that sometimes i can be a person that says it a lot but i think when i use it most of the time i really mean it and so i really i i need to end the show um okay thank you guys so much for listening. We'll be back tomorrow. I'll be sitting in this chair waiting. And he'll still be waiting. And gosh, Luigi is barking right now because Kirsten is here. She just got here.

She's staying with me. Oh, Kirsten's here? Yeah. Kirsten just got here. What the hell? Why do you think he's barking, bro? I don't know, bro. I love you.

All right. We'll see you tomorrow. Noah, I love you too. I love you. Don't be cut. And Jack the Lantern. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive

balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show, ears edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now plus you'll get special content just for podcast listeners like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines listen on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. We want to speak out and we want this to stop. Wow, very powerful. I'm Ellie Flynn, an investigative journalist,

and this is my journey deep into the adult entertainment industry. I really wanted to be a player boy in my adult. He was like, I'll take you to the top, I'll make you a star. To expose an alleged predator and the rotten industry he works in. It's honestly so much worse than I had anticipated. We're an army in comparison to him. From Novel, listen to The Bunny Trap on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

People, my people, what's up? This is Quartz Love. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Sheckner, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You've got to check them out.

Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, and now, Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson.

Listen to Minnie Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers.