The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #157 The Stranger Thing

Episode Date: January 7, 2022

Nikki and Andrew kick things off by wondering why they want to impress strangers more than their partners. Nikki explains why "covid nose" came in handy and Andrew says he is a sight to see when breaking moving boxes. You Heard It Here First: the things we do in spite of our exes, counting to 3, staying grounded in a relationship and a Sports Moment about how lying can bite you in the ankle. Fanthrax messages brought all the swells with a mispronunciation, getting sober and a story about getting chased. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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I speak with some of the best product builders out there. I've always been inspired by frustration. It came back to my own personal pinpoint. So we had to go out to farmers and convince them. Following that curiosity is a superpower. You have to be obsessed with the human condition. Listen to Building One on the iHeartRadio app, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts. Here's Nikki. Hello. Here I am. Welcome to the Nikki Glaser podcast.

Andrew's already here. What's up, glasses? And shaved face, baby. And shaved face glasses. New look, new year. New look, new year, new you. You just were on Instagram this morning. Someone sent me your story that said,

no, it didn't say please, it said, recommend a good personal trainer that will come to me. It was a demand. Yes. It was, and someone goes, shouldn't it say, recommend a good personal trainer who will come to me? And I said, yes, that's true, but whatever. I'm not training my brain. Yeah, we know that.

One bound. Yeah, I'm trying. Choo-choo. Okay, what percentage of that is you actually looking for a personal trainer because you can't find one via Google? And what percentage of that is you wanting to get a little bit of a freebie

from someone who... Oh, no freebie. No freebie. I'm not looking for a freebie. Why can't you just ask... Why don't you just Google? Well, Brenna would recommend that she would do it. Because I think that there's an old-fashioned way of like,

hey, who's the best in town? Oh, there is an old-fashioned way. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Wait, so Brenna said she might be your personal trainer? She said she would do it, but I... I bet she would be great at it. She really would be, but I just think like,

I only like being told what to do so much. You know what I mean? And a personal trainer, you're just, Brenna, you could be like, no, I don't want to do that. But a personal trainer, you're going to do it. Sometimes I try to impress strangers more than my girlfriend or my best friends. Totally. It's so pathetic.

I don't know why that brain thing is like that. I do it all the time, I think. Why is that? like that i do it all the time i think why is today i went to the lounge in our building and um i started working as soon as one other person was in there it just and it wasn't like i was trying to impress them it just and i was doing some work in the lobby in my hotel the other day and there was a chance to sit in this chair like behind this woman or at this table where this woman was next to me working and it just makes me work harder all it takes is a stranger if i'm alone in a gym not gonna do as impressive of a job if i'm on a treadmill in front of some like fit people that's gonna be a good workout i mean

there's a reason why classes exist i guess but yeah i don't know why, but it's like, you know, you want. I think it's competitiveness. I think you both have a competitiveness in you. I know, but why wouldn't I want to impress the person that I want to actually really impress the most? Because you know that they aren't fooled by you. Yes, they're not going to be fooled by you. Or, you know, they know the real you. So, you know, you you're because we project so much

different because we know how we feel about strangers and how much we like in fill in the blanks of what they're presenting and like oh my god their life must be she i look at a girl with like multiple necklaces which yes i wear multiple necklaces now but i go her life must be so organized she must have like a cute house that's clean and like she cleans it herself and she has like different soaps that she like loves the scents of and like she shops for them.

Different candles. Yeah, candles and scents and it's like her special scent and she like knows what flowers she likes and like- And can name them. Has opinions about things, like knows what she likes.

Whereas I'm just someone who's like- Spends a sunday with her grandma i don't need to do that that's where you draw the line no i was just writing a sample chapter of my book and attempting to and i was talking about some hotel i was staying at and i was like i i picked this hotel because you know a production company was putting me up in la and i never stayed there as a guest in LA where I got to pick the hotel where they're like, anywhere you want to stay, we'll pay.

And I was like, instead of Googling it or doing research, I just went with the hotel that I knew a rich friend of mine who has good taste and like dresses cool

stayed at. Ask a friend. Didn't even ask him. But it goes to this thing in my life. But you knew that they liked it. I would rather to this thing in my life. But you knew that they liked it. I would rather, in some aspects of my life,

trust someone who I project coolness onto than what I actually like. Yes. That makes sense. Like music, I know what I like. Movies, TV, I know what I like. Clothing, I'm somewhere in between. I will sometimes wear things that I don't like because I know that I like um clothing I'm somewhere in between I will sometimes wear things that I

don't like because they just I know that they're cool you know my whole life this is who I am I was a skateboarder I like rage against the machine I mean they were okay they were okay right but I got in that was my you know we've both kind of been that way of being like a chameleon and comedy and tv like i knew that i had good taste in those aspects i'm trying yeah but when it comes to fashion home decor cars uh scents scents is the one that i will never reach a place not never but i don't i don't trust what i think smells good in terms of perfume i just that is something for some reason I will just blindly trust someone who looks clean and pretty, like whatever they wear.

I will just get it without smelling it. Do you feel like you don't use like even before a COVID thing, sense of smell. I'm stained. I innately don't. I I'm a stained person. That's how I feel. You're gross.

I'm gross. Okay. And so I don't. I'm a stained person. That's how I feel. Meaning you're gross. I'm gross. Okay. And so I don't know what good, I don't know what clean and neat and crisp and beautiful smell like. I feel that way with food. Even though I love food, but if I'm out at a restaurant,

I'll go to my friend who I assume knows food or knows wine. I'll just be like what is that because i don't even i can't even wrap my brain around like i would not do that for seafood because i know what i like yeah and i feel like i have a very well you have a very yeah but for me like i'll eat a pretty much anything smart it sounds like because you were i'm trusting someone else that you're doing it out of i want to experience new things i'm doing it out of i don't trust what i like because i do like certain smells i love the orange uh myers cleaning scent it's gardenia i fucking love it okay that's a start i've i've bought perfumes before that i go you know what nikki you like this get it and then

i show it to my friends who are like clean and beautiful people that are just like naturally. And they're like, it's all right. And I'm just like, I shall never wear it again. I can't. I will abandon something I like in terms of when it comes to aesthetics and smells. Okay. Instantly. Now, do you ask your boyfriend if they like that smell?

The guy I'm seeing hates any scent. Any scent of a woman. Yeah, but he only has 60% of his smell back from having COVID. Yes. And I think he's exaggerating a little bit. Because why not? Because let me just tell you, when I had a UTI, things were not great one morning. He smelled it?

I smelled myself. and i was like what the fuck it you know what it smelled i'm just gonna be honest here yeah when i had a uti let as i disclosed the other day and it's it's totally gone i'm still taking the antibiotics but it's gone and um yeah i don't like i my pussy will smell sometimes just like from, no, no, no, don't do that. It'll just, you know, you have like a, if you have a vagina out there or a girlfriend that has a vagina, some days it's just going to like smell because you haven't washed it in a while. And it's like, you know, urine, just must sweat. Just, you know, like the way a shirt would smell if you wore it all day.

It's not like, but then there's this one kind of smell that I've only smelled before. In the bathroom at Sirius, when we used to work there, some days I would walk in and there would be a fog of just almost a ghost of a bacterial infection. Like you could almost see it. It smelled like a fish market. It was so thick and putrid. It felt like I was in uh you know it would be like a cartoon smell yeah you know that you could see and some days you just walk into a

stall and be like that poor woman she obviously has bv bacterial vaginosis like there's a bacterial thing going on and she doesn't know because she's smelling it constantly or she does know it but i smelled that smell on myself unintentionally one morning after after the first night of feeling like i was coming down with something i slept on it but like i didn't know what to do i slept with a towel between my legs because my vagina was just like weeping all night it was just like tearing up and in the morning i felt fine like i was just in bed like laying there and i felt fine. And I'm, you know,

smooching my, my man and like getting a little amorous. And then we start hooking up. I'm in the mood for it. And Oh my God, I was like horrified at how bad I smelled. Like, and I was like,

Oh my God, something's wrong. And I, if he had his 60% of his smell back, he would have stopped what he was doing. Oh, you think he has less than 60% then only because I could smell it from where I was.

And he was not like, he was closer to, he wasn't going down on me, but he was closer to it. If he didn't have any reaction, which I saw like, we're close enough that he'd be like, babe, what's going – you know?

Like, it was at that point I was about to say something. I put a pillow over my face because I couldn't enjoy what was happening. You were killing yourself. Because of how bad it was. Now you think – And that's why I think he has less than 60%. I thought this whole time that you were talking about that he was lying about – that he had more than 60%. No, no.

I think he has less. So you think your puss smelled so bad a guy with, I don't know, 7% could have smelled that thing. Absolutely. No, I think he's probably down to 10%, but whatever it was, it didn't cut through. Maybe that's the cure. Or maybe it did and he just didn't tell me. Maybe it was a 10

and then he would not have been able to stay hard. The horrible smell of your pussy got him to 60. It opened up his nostrils. Oh yeah, It's like smelling salts. It could wake someone up. It was so bad. So what did you do? Did you stop the business?

Shout out to any girls out there that have had smelly pussies. It happened to me. I'm a clean person, and it happened to me. It wasn't my fault. It was just I had- Can you bottle that? Maybe this is a business. There was that one girl.

She made 200 grand selling farts. Some of the farts. I know. You got to sell BV. No one 200 grand selling farts. Farts. I know. You got to sell BV. No one wants that. Farts guys really get off on. I'm sure there's one guy who's fetishizes like, you know, bacterial infections in women's vaginas, but.

A dead tuna. Yeah. What? What? So what did you do? Did you stop the ship? You said. No, we finished.

I put a pillow over my head. It was feeling good. It didn't feel bad. It was just there was the smell of something bad that later came back because for whatever reason the infection would like heat up at night and really hurt at night but in the morning i didn't feel it at all i just smelled the aftermath and i was like jesus christ and then i realized that's the smell i smell in the bathroom sometimes when i go in after a woman and she's long gone i mean she was there weeks ago and it's you can still smell it and you go,

what happened to her? And now I know it's just she has a UTI. I've experienced, working as a fishmonger, I experienced a similar kind of feel. A fish had a UTI. Yeah, I fucked a fish and it burned my dick. No, I- You would smell like it.

I would, yeah, dude. And you just, it's very embarrassing. You know it. you try to pretend that no one else knows it but everyone knows it oh and you know it's like bad breath i don't know i don't know what you do do you put an altoid in your pussy what do you gotta yeah yeah i would i would i think there should be little listerine pocket pack strips for your pussy because it's wet enough down there that they would dissolve yeah that's a good idea no you just don't have sex when you have a UTI.

I didn't know I had a UTI at that point. I just thought it was a little stingy the night before. And then I... If you threw a Mentos in your pussy, it would explode like a Diet Coke. Oh my God. It would start foaming. I never thought I would be able to admit that my vagina stank, ever. Good for you. And I'm really proud of myself. I don't even think I would have able to admit that my vagina stank, ever. Good for you.

And I'm really proud of myself. I don't even think I would have done it three months ago. I'm not kidding you. Because it's so humiliating to be. But I realized in that moment, much like I realize a lot of things that I feel such shame for, I didn't want it to smell. It's not inherently who I am. I just had a lot of fucking sex before that i got a uti

which is a common thing and one of the side effects is that you have a smelly pussy i washed it as soon as i could it wasn't like i was like oh you know i'll just wing it i knew he had covid nose so he wasn't smelling it or else i would have stopped things if i would have seen any kind of grimace on his face or like the hairs on his beard start to singe off yes i would have seen any kind of grimace on his face or like the hairs on his beard start to singe off yes i would have stopped things coven knows i knew we could keep going because he had coven uh it is there's something wonderful about having a guy that has no sense of smell yeah or anything because now i can wear perfumes and stuff because he used to hate that stuff and now i'm like oh i can kind of it's like flicking off a blind guy it's great yeah yeah or telling a

deaf guy go fuck yourself behind his back it's a it's a it's like having a guy with no sense of taste or smell flicking off a blind guy is so funny i've never even thought of that um what's it like living with your lady? It's been less than a week. Yeah, we're still in the stage of just getting Amazon boxes. And it's like we haven't even had time to just like. You're living in more of a cardboard box than most homeless people right now. Based on how many boxes are in your apartment.

Yeah, honestly. And I got to tell you, it feels good. I don't know. I think it's my future, to be honest. But no, you just break down fucking boxes. That's all our lives are. And maybe people that live in houses don't have to break down the box. Maybe they could just put it out there.

No, no, no. You think you just stack boxes in the street, and then who breaks it down for you? The garbage man. Tom Petty? What? Break down. Go ahead. No.

Give it to me. One pound. Go ahead. No. Give it to me. One bound. One bound. Wait. So, yes. Well, I've been breaking down boxes in this house. Yes. For forever.

And you've done some of them for me. It's fucking hell. Yes. Yes. It's hell. I don't know why. The first three, it's great. It's like you rip them and you fucking feel that.

Well, you've got to do it with a knife. That makes it so much easier, dude. I know I cut myself, though. No, you wouldn't. You just slice down the middle and then it's so much easier. Oh, God. Yeah, I think there's probably a YouTube video that will instruct you. Just go down the side of the middle, slice it, and then rip the sides because they come off easier when you have a...

If you want to see ADD, look at how I rip know i i bet it's the same way you chew a straw yeah it's it's ugly it's a mess it's it's it just makes messes everywhere then little pieces fly off it's there's no time getting the little pieces each one yeah it's a mess but anyways so other than that i mean i fucking love it dude i feel so at ease with her and um i don't know there's like there really is no percentage of me and be like i can't believe i'm doing this it's just not there and it's weird that it's not there to me but it's not and i'm i'm really like i love her coming home and like watching we're watching the oc again which i've seen like 40 times is she like is she looking is she like mocking the fashions and stuff because she was just a

baby when that stuff was going on so she doesn't yeah she was an embryo when but i mean like it was just so normal to us but is there anything that she's observing in it as someone who was it holds up actually i think and i you know i always seth was so cute i always thought i was a seth because i'm jewish in a christian town he's funny and i remember i told my buddy casey i go you know i was watching it again a couple years ago and i was like i'm such like a seth he's like you're fucking the debt you're you're older than the debt your eyebrows first of all yeah dude if anything Gallagher. Yeah, dude. If anything, I might be the grandpa.

I was literally attributing myself still to Seth. And I'm just like, he's like, dude, what the fuck are you talking about? I still want to be Kelly Kapowski. Yeah, back then, though. You could watch it back then and still relate to yourself now. Yeah, I mean, i think that they still there was something else i was watching recently where i was like i or you know even sex in the city like old episodes i still look at them as like adults like and even though they're younger

than uh yeah yeah it's like i'm older than lebron james and maybe because he's tall maybe taller people seem older that could be no but you know what i don't know what it is like no because you always thought of basketball stars when you were a kid yeah that's true yeah i think it's just yeah yeah yeah it's so weird when you how that doesn't change though how i can still i still watch sex in the city and they seem like old ladies to me i mean now they are yeah but like this the original one did you watch any of the new ones i saw half of the first season or first i'm sorry first episode that's enough when she started doing the podcast thing oh it made me hate myself for doing podcasts that's how bad it was i know i know also the other co-hosts i i mean bobby lee great whatever did that other woman in it

she just came off and hit that elevator where she's like, you better. She's good. Oh, so good. It made me want to smoke pot, though. She's just like smoking pot in that elevator. I was like, God, that looks so good. Let's take a short break and we'll come back with the news. 2025 is bound

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All right, let's get to the news for the first time this week. Let's do it. I mean, it's been a while. I hope you had all the swells out there. It's been about a couple of weeks. It's Wednesday folks. You know what that means? Let me play the,

it is Wednesday. All right, let's play it now. Okay. You heard it here first. You heard it here first. Yeah, you heard it here first.

Okay. A scorned woman stuffs dead fish through her ex's mail slot daily as revenge in the hopes that he will want her back she calls it my toxic trait wait what there's a tiktok trend right now of people putting up their toxic traits there's a lot on tiktok of people doing like horrible shit knowing that it will get views oh god and they'll be like do for the talk do for the talk beat the shit out of that old man or whatever you know whatever it is to just get one viral video like i don't know how many people have gone to jail to get a viral video but it's probably been a lot so this girl every day puts a dead fish and she films herself doing it yeah and it's called my toxic trait and everyone's like oh

you're so quirky oh this is so funny so funny. Has he seen this yet? Has he responded to her? Has he reached out to her? I don't know. Noah, do we know if there was a response? Didn't investigate that hard. But it has over 2 million views. I mean, what have you done out of spite that...

Yeah, that's a good question. I'm too lazy to be spiteful. Well, that's not ever going to get a guy back. I feel like it's such a hard place to be in when you get rejected and you want someone back. Because the only way to really get them back is to act like you don't care. Yeah. There's nothing you can do. And doing nothing is so fucking hard.

Does she buy a fish every morning? You know? You know what they say. She's doing it for the talk. She's not doing it to get this guy back. There's no way she thinks this is gonna work that's life like life right now is for the internet not for the person that you're it's a stranger yeah it's a stranger thing i just caring about the stranger it is and celebrity yeah i um i'm trying to think of anything i mean

i've been terrible to people that have hurt me before and i like i really regret some of the things i did i mean i i you know zach sherwin was on our show mr napkins who uh he doesn't go by that name anymore but he was a guy i dated and he wrote a rap song about me that hurt my feelings after we broke up and i mean i did everything you would have been fine you know what i mean covid knows would have saved you there that would have oh my god i did i did date a guy once who had no sense of smell oh yeah and uh when we hooked up for the first time because it was like a long distance thing and then we met up in a city and um that we were both visiting and we got to the hotel and he took a shit and didn't know how bad it smelled and i was like really turned off by the smell but i still hooked up with him but he i

just knew that he didn't smell it but he i feel like you would be extra vigilant if you didn't know i think yeah your other senses you could hear how loud the shit hit the water. Like other things would pick up on the fact. You would just be so paranoid about smelling because you have no sense of smell that you would, you know? But he didn't get, I mean, that was just a thing. No, so I've done things to, I know I wanted to make him feel really bad for what he,

I just wanted to make him hurt as much as he had hurt me. And these were all – every time I've done that, it's been a guy that I pretty much have said, oh, they're never going to like me again. I might as well just – I mean it sounds cheesy, but like the person you're hurting over and over again is yourself because you're letting – you're not letting it go. So every day it's like – And you still like them because love and hate are the same thing it's just like the opposite yeah i mean the idea that this girl goes and buys a fish every morning instead of moving on if you don't care when someone doesn't care about you and just

moves on that's the most painful thing you could do to someone i love the idea of this guy like making fish with his eggs every like thanks wow free fish he thinks he did like a subscription service and he forgot he did late night on amazon no cardboard either that i have to like just a fish every morning have you ever done anything spiteful no i'm gonna ask you next. You're on deck. I think I've done things in the moment, like in college, in jealous rage. Have you ever said, my biggest fear is just someone saying something super mean to me after a rejection. That's why I've said this before.

It's why I never liked to criticize anyone because I feel like they can just come back at me and say the meanest thing. No, I've never been in a relationship where if I'm ending it, I don't want to add to that, obviously. But in reaction... No, if they end it with you. Yeah, so there was a time... They're like, I don't want to do it anymore, you're fat. That kind of thing that guys do sometimes.

Well, she had a close guy friend who I could have swore they were fucking. And I got drunk and i knew that he was over there and i went over there like in a jealous drunk rage in college and pounding on the door like that whole look oh i fought a guy in a bar over her and um literally over her was this one of the guys she was grinding with oh no that was oh yeah yeah i told you that's what yeah she was grinding with the guy i was hammered it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I told you. Yeah, she was grinding with the guy. I was hammered.

It was actually Tom Takara who had that story, but I love that you also had a girlfriend who was grinding with guys and you just had to watch. Oh, really? But I just confused your story. Like, yeah. But that's the thing that girls just did to make guys jealous. She would go grind and be like, what?

I'm dancing. Yeah, I'm just fucking. That's just, we're just dancing. But your pants are off. It's like crazy yeah so they're grinding yeah and i go up in a jealous rage we're not dating we're like in a break or whatever but we just hooked up maybe the night before and i went up and i i go stop dancing with her like i like turned into batman but just fat Man because I drank too much whiskey.

And I was like, Fat Man, my body's falling apart. So I go to him. I go, let go of her. You start grinding on the other side of him? Yeah. Just like, hey, man, like whispering in his ear. Oh, my God. And every morning I'd show up at his fraternity and I'd grind with her.

Did you grab her and go like, honey, get out of the way? Or were you literally like, they're still dancing? So this is what I did. This is a true story. I go up, I go, let go of her. You're done grinding with her.

And he's looking at me like, who, like, there's no context here. I just went up, you know, I like floated in. You were like, that's the question. It's a loud bar. He just probably hears, he probably hears this

so I go let go of her stop grinding and I go you have to count to three to like swear to my wife you have to count to three you fucked up the threat no no no

till the count of three you have to count to three. You fucked up the threat. No, no, no. I said, you have, wait. Till the count of three. You have to count. You have to count to three. It's so funny to say to someone. I bet you didn't say that. It's you have till the count of three. Okay.

He got to two and he just didn't know. Oh my God. So I go like this. I swear to God, I go one. I started counting with my hands. I go, two. What song's playing? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Three doors down.

So I go, one, two, three, and I just attack him. When you went to two, were you like, fuck, I have to do this? Yeah, I was like, I can't believe he didn't grind me. How drunk were you? You remember this, so you weren't that Yeah, I was like, I can't believe he didn't grind me. How drunk were you? You remember this, so you weren't that drunk. I was fucked up. You don't get blackout drunk, right? I do.

I do. You do remember this. For some reason, I remember this. I don't know why. Maybe just whatever. So I start fighting him, right? Yeah. And he lifts me, picks my shirt over my head, so I'm just punching.

I can't see him. But I somehow make out his face and like with my shirt over my head. And I I hit him and I go to swing again. And I'm just like punching air. I'm like, what the hell? I take the shirt off. He's on the ground. Like I nailed him.

Yeah. So then she's still grinding. No, no, no, no, no. So then the lights came on in the bar. So now everyone, or is it closing time? No, it's just like music stops, lights on. I'm thrown out, like literally picked up by three bouncers. Like a battering ram.

And I'm outside being like, I can't believe, fucker. And I'm punching, I start punching like a fence. God, always such a cool look. Punching inanimate objects when you're angry. Just punching a fence. Never has that once looked cool. Then called her probably like a thousand times that night being like. What did you do in the morning?

I mean. Did you ever see the guy again? No. No fallout from, did you guys in the morning? I mean, I was- Did you ever see the guy again? No. No. No fallout from- Did you guys get back together? Maybe a year later. I don't know.

Maybe a month later. Yeah. But she was big on, like, if I- Like you said, like, when I stopped fighting. Like, I remember we went to, like, Acapulco for my senior spring break. And I got in the best shape of my life. I was, like, doing me me i didn't talk to her once in acapulco made out with like two girl like was just like completely like for the first time

revenge body and then i literally got back to new orleans she comes over that night we have sex and then i'm like crying outside her place that night like she got me like that like it's like a drug yeah you got sober from it you got in great everything i could do yeah knuckling it and then the second you get back in yeah i mean that's and but you know that's probably why i was single for another 20 years because i didn't want any of the i didn't want to punch a fence yeah i'm not a punching fence guy. You know what I mean? Was it a chain link?

Wooden? It was wooden. I punched a hole through it. Really? Yeah. Wilson got hit in the head. Hey, neighbor. That hurt.

Oh, my God. We finally saw what he looked like. Well, I mean, his face was bloodied, but he was obscured again. It was bloody to hear. Oh, my God. But, yeah, but that's what I'm saying. Like, I was spiteful in the moment. Yeah.

I feel like you've been spiteful for little spites. No, I thought calculating. Yeah, that's way i think we were just talking about how like someone could fear um like getting involved with a girl because they might hurt her and then what could happen and i was like well that doesn't like why do you get scared of hurting me or whatever it could be and it's like oh wait you should be i could i be. I'm not crazy. I'm just smart and cunning. Yeah, that's the scariest person. Yeah, but the thing is, I definitely think that was me.

If someone doesn't like me, go. Yes. Before, if you didn't like me, I would try to convince you that you should like me. You probably like yourself a little more now. Yeah, it's not the who I am anymore to operate that way, like out of spite. I'm not saying, I don't want to say never,

but it's just, I don't know. When guys don't like me now, I'm just like, you're dumb. Like, how could you not? Noah, when have you been spiteful and what did you do? All right. So the, all right. The story that I can think of that I think I can share is I guess I was being spiteful because I was locked into this relationship where we would break up and get back together. And I was like, I'm going to do something where he will never take me back.

So we had broken up. Whoa, burn it down. Oh, yeah. So I went to the village, and I got my nipples pierced by a guy who looked like Slash from Guns N' Roses. You got your nipples pierced? Yeah. Hence the bruising. Wait. Oh, yeah.

Noah, you finally got what you wanted. Yeah, you didn't have to have them suck. Bloody and bruised. Yeah, he put a hole in them with his teeth. I know. Oh, my God. I don't have them anymore. Bloodied and bruised. Yeah, he put a hole in them with his teeth. I know. Oh, my God. I don't have them anymore. Did you go alone or did you bring a friend?

I took my best friend, Rob, with me. Okay. Oh, yeah. I know him. And I was just like- Wait, are they still pierced? No. I have no idea.

I don't have them anymore. I took them off- Rock and roll. Like end of 20s. Like all through my 20s, I went with them. So wait, so you get your nipples pierced and then you go back to- so how does this burn it down because he didn't like piercings and stuff like that so i was like he will never think i'm attractive again we'll never get back together oh wow did you ever hook up with him after that and realize he didn't really care about the nipples

being pierced did we hook up um i don't think i don't think so i think it it's something that i did to keep me from going back more than him oh okay couldn't have been though because i've done this before so with chris who i've broken up with a lot he's the one that like doesn't like scents he doesn't like candles he doesn't like perfumes um when we i never like got to put candles in my apartment because he just didn't never like liked that smell and he uh so when we broke up we still remained friends and he came over to like pick up my dog once and like it was the week and there was candles everywhere and it was me that your nipples getting you know i was yeah it was my version of like this thing i finally get to do that i've always wanted to do fuck you i'm gonna like it was a it was a fuck you but it was also like it was also like I you knew if this guy really loved you the nipple thing wouldn't be a

deal breaker you knew you were burning it to the ground you were trying to be yourself finally yeah you know like you're trying to be the biggest version of yourself to go it's like an emancipation like finally I can be myself and i i think that i know this isn't gonna make you hate me forever but it's just going to show you that i was trying to be good for you and that i was trying my best i was i was keeping a part of myself locked away because i wanted to keep you and so you'll see now that like you kept me down. Like it's almost that. Yeah. And now I would just like, I have candles because it's like, it's my place.

And if he wants to come over, I'll blow them out out of courtesy. But he's got COVID. No. So I don't have to worry about it. Yeah. And they smell like dirty vag. Yeah. But wait.

So I do. I should do a Gwyneth Paltrow candles. You know, she has one that smells like vagina. Yeah. Mine should smell like BV. Yeah. Just put a Gwyneth Paltrow candle. You know, she has one that smells like vagina. Yeah. Mine should smell like BV. Yeah. Just put a fish in that mail slot of yours. My God, it's going full circle.

So wait. So do you think, though, like how? Because I don't think the answer is to get rid of your candles. If you're dating someone that hates candles. No, it is. Because if he doesn't he didn't like it really bothered him the sound like it's something that it actually you know it's like if um but if your nipples are pierced right and this guy goes well i i don't i don't

really prefer piercings like i think it's kind of dirty that's that's fucked up that's not us like that's not a sensory thing that causes you to get a headache well it's a sensory if he sees it and he's turned off i guess i don't know i mean i'm just saying like what's the answer like do you do that well you have candles but you blow them out when he comes over you have nipple rings but you don't you just come out when you fuck no you just say listen sorry that's what i'm saying so then i think you keep the or maybe you find a candle that maybe it smells like a sports jersey of his favorite hockey player

yeah I don't know I think that I I don't know what the answer is and I think a lot of girls get because guys are always

like don't get your boobs done don't get your lips done because they think you're trying to be hotter to get a hotter guy

that's what guys really do think don't do this can I be honest though I don't think it's just that I think for me like because you know whatever i love you and i don't want you to change your face it's perfect the way it is but that's the honest truth like you already it's not that i'm scared of the other guy it's that you've already like so but like i get also like doing it for you and it's not about me at all but you know how often do people get

haircuts and dye their hair? I got Invisalign because I was going through a breakup. I was just like, you just want to change something about yourself. And I wonder what that is because I've cut my hair, which makes it look worse, in my opinion. I've dyed my hair, which makes it look worse, in my opinion. It wasn't things to make me look hotter, to be like, you're going to rue the day. It's almost like what Noah did, which is doing something that will make them go, ugh. Yeah.

It's interesting. I don't know why we do that. So it's like we either get revenge body and we actually – but then that hurts you in other ways too because maybe you're just so focused on getting abs that you think it will be the cure to your happiness. But – or we – it's like either you hit the bottle or you hit the gym. Like it's a negative, it's a strong, full throttle. My mom, she liked the bottle.

You hit the bottle or you go full throttle. It's all connected. Can we do one more news story before we get to break? Yeah, okay. I kind of like this one. Kim Kardashian has seemingly unfollowed Miley Cyrus. I loved this one.

I was dying to talk about this. Holy shit. So Pete and Miley do New Year's Eve together. Yes. And Fallon together as well. Okay. So they did a lot of things together. Great connection.

So funny. Good chemistry. Good comedic energy. And then something happened where then Pete obviously reconnects with Kim Kardashian after doing New Year's Eve with Miley. And Kim unfollows Miley, which is hilarious that people pay that close attention. But of course they do. So what this means is that Miley either disparaged Kim in some way or tried to fuck Pete. But I'm guessing it's the first one. There's something she did where it wasn't cool to Pete in some way or tried to fuck Pete, but I'm guessing it's the first one.

Like she maybe, there's something she did where it wasn't cool to Pete in some way. It's in the story. Wait, we know what she did? So before their special, oh, sorry, go ahead, Noah. No, no, you deliver it. You're the news person. No, no, I'm just reading the notes.

So Cyrus seemingly put the moves on Davidson while promoting the event, serenading him on the Tonight Show and singing It Should Have Been Me. That was all joke. She was seen walking out of his apartment. Following the Tonight Show appearance, Cyrus was spotted heading to Davidson's

She went all the way to the Staten Island condo. That's tough to get back. Following Fallon? Yeah, following the appearance to the Staten Island condo. I mean, that's tough to get back. Following Fallon or after New Year's Eve? Following the appearance of The Tonight Show. Okay, well, they still had to work on bits, so they might have been going over stuff. That's true, too. I think that's what we're saying it's about, is her jealousy,

but I think it's because Miley and Pete aren't cool either. And we can't really track if he's following her and if they had a falling out, but I'm guessing something happened between them and kim is just being um supportive of that supportive like i think miley and pete clashed in some way yeah and that pete told and pete's done with miley and so out of support kim is like yeah fuck her oh that is my thought process i don't I don't, I don't.

I love how we make it though about like she does it, she thinks she's trying. I would keep, I would never, if I was jealous of a girl trying to fuck my boyfriend, I would keep following her.

I wouldn't, if I unfollowed her, that means I'm threatened by you. You have a reason to. Would you, would you mute her? No, I wouldn't even,

I would do, I'd probably mute her because she can't tell on her end. Yeah, she can't tell on her. But no, I wouldn't do it. I feel like you like to see the boogeyman. I do not. Well, first of all, if I sense that someone wanted to fuck my boyfriend, which I believe me happens a lot because I've seen it,

I would be very turned on. I would be like, good. Someone, Miley Cyrus wants to fuck my boyfriend. I would not be threatened by it at all because he would go be with her if he wanted to be with her. But I could see Kim being threatened.

Miley is an amazing performer. She doesn't have any kids. She's never, she has been married. Yeah, so let him go. She's younger. You're gonna lose him if he is gonna be,

if he's gonna go with her. You're gonna lose him anyway. Let him go. And Kim is like a boss. I don't think she's younger you're gonna lose him if he is gonna be if he's gonna go with her you're gonna lose him anyway let him go and kim you unfollowing her boss i don't think she's i don't think kim is no no no i think she is a boss but there are certain things that miley can do that she can't do right but i think the way i interpreted it was that kim was like i'm not gonna pay you any mind you do not exist to me and it was like but she unfollowed her that's paying her mind yeah that's the thing it's like that's a it's just such a it's it's a it's like we were saying before it's the opposite of love opposite of it's it's she's thinking about her she's paying she is paying her mind by even thinking to unfollow her yeah um yeah i just this whole thing of like if someone if a girl there's this there

was a girl that i noticed really throwing it at the guy i'm dating and i said to him like this girl likes you it's clear and it's crystal fucking clear to me and i was there was a tinge of me being like annoyed that she knows that he has a – he's seeing someone. She knows it's me and yet she still went on to flirt with him. There's a little bit of like that's disrespectful. Like how dare you? But maybe she heard you say that you're cool with him fucking other girls. I don't think she did. But if she did that there's

a different thing but um no but like when he would mention me around her she would never say anything the conversation would drop off you know i'm saying she wouldn't acknowledge it now do you do you think though if she would but you said miley cyrus you wouldn't care there's no part of you that's like competitive of like oh this person's more famous this person's more successful this person's prettier than i don't want him if i feel like i'm superior to the woman then it doesn't bother me as much no um because there are women that are more talented than me that have liked my guy and i just of course there's like oh god she's better at this stuff but then i just go is she a better hang is she but you know i just there's more to that if i'm gonna and he should feel the same way

anyone who dates me i'm gonna be i have a chance at some pretty hot talented people because of the profession i'm in and if every single one of them i go oh i get a crush on every one of them and they threaten my relationship, then no one should be with me because that's going to happen all the time. You have to trust the person that even though the person's more talented than you or hotter than you or skinnier,

more sexy, that they have integrity. And that's the thing. And you could always give the old three, two, one. Make them count to three. I go, you need to count to three. One, two, it's punch and fence time. Okay.

Let's take a break and come back with Why Do I Care? No. That was Why Do I Care? A sports moment. Oh, my God. It's Thursday. I know. Time has flown.

We also miss Mondays. All right. 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities. I'm Joel. Oh, and I am Matt. And we're the hosts of How To Money. We want to be with you every step of the way in your financial journey this year,

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to change your relationship with money so you can stress less and grow your net worth. That's right. How to Money comes out three times a week, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for money advice without the judgment and jargon. Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show, ears edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to

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Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical ever. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements and some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers, but we also love speaking to the folks who are making it happen behind the scenes and pave the way for those that followed, you know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations, like I'm Pete Bill, chatting up with hitmaker Sam Holland, Sugar Steve chatting

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Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, Minnie Questions. Over the years, we have had some incredible guests. People like Courtney Cox, star of the infinitely beloved sitcom Friends, EGOT winner Viola Davis, and former Prime Minister of the UK, Tony Blair. And now, Mini Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our

seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Each episode is a new person's story with new lessons, new memories, and new connections to show us how we're both similar and unique. Listen to Mini Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. We want to speak out, we want to raise awareness, and we want this to stop. Wow, very powerful. I'm Ellie Flynn, and I'm an investigative journalist. When a group of models from the UK wanted my help,

I went on a journey deep into the heart of the adult entertainment industry. I really wanted to be a playboy model. Lingerie, topless. I said, yes, please. Because at the centre of this murky world is an alleged predator. You know who he is because of his pattern of behaviour. He's just spinning the web for you to get trapped in it.

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We're back. It's time for Sports Moment. Here's Andrew's weekly sports moment. Oh, here we go. What is it? All right. Antonio Brown. Do you know who he is?

I've heard his name. So he's a wide receiver in the NFL. Okay. He was literally top three receiver in the NFL. Unbelievable. I'll pretend like I know what a receiver is. Wide receiver, they catch balls, whatever. On the side because they're wide. Yeah.

So wide equals on the side? So they're farther away from the quarterback. Are they usually bigger men, like wider as well? No, they're usually skinnier actually. Okay, wide receiver. Got it. And the tight end is wider than the wide receiver. And where are the tight ends?

In the middle? Closer. Tight. They're tight on the end. Oh, they're on the end, though, still. On the end of the line, the wide receiver is not on the line. Oh, God. So anyhow.

This is why do I care. Okay, yeah. So Antonio Brown, okay, I'll just get to it, says that he apparently, his coach. Apparently. Apparently, his coach pressured him to play with a severe ankle injury and accuses the Bucs of an ongoing cover-up to see their doctors. So this is what happened.

This past weekend, he's in the game. He also lied about getting a COVID vaccine, and he was suspended for three games. And he has a history of being in trouble. So it's a lot of like the boy that cried wolf. So now he's saying that he was on the sideline. He has an ankle injury. The coach goes up to him.

We want you in the game. He goes, I can't, my ankle. He goes, stop being a pussy. We need you in the game. Do we have footage of this? I mean, aren't they always being filmed on the sidelines? Can't we read some lips? We haven't seen footage of this.

Okay. It might come out sure apparently there's text apparently of him telling that the coach knows that he has a shitty ankle okay yeah i would believe that any time any of the best players are injured in any way they get a hangnail the coach fucking knows yeah right uh you would think okay yeah and then but a lot of times it's like put a shot in and shut the the fuck up. Like there's still that. Like when I was on Dancing with the Stars. Fucking numb it up and go out there and let's win this.

Or let's get kicked off first. So he goes, I'm not going. He goes, okay, well, now Antonio Brown is claiming that he cut him right there. Now he's already dealing with the. Cut him. Cut him. Like you're off the team. You're fired.

Oh. So Antonio Brown stands up, goes out on the field. On a shitty angle. Takes out, takes off all. His clothes? His jersey, his shoulder pads. Is there footage of this? His shirt, yes.

His shirtless. Is everyone going, what the fuck is happening? Yes. Did you see this live? Yes. Okay. Everyone's going fucking nuts. Security thinks he's a streaker.

They didn't even, like, put it together because a couple of them didn't see that he's taking off all his fucking clothes. Right. He's not naked, but top off. And he's jogging around. So now everyone's like, well, your ankle's fine enough to do this dance. But it's obviously a different thing cutting and trying to be. Wait, cutting someone from the game or the team?

From the team. Like you kicked off my team? Yeah. So he was claiming he was fired before he quit. You can fire someone on the sidelines well you could tell them yeah i guess okay is it up to only a coach to fire someone no it could be uh the coach makes the final wouldn't the owner probably have a little bit of a say in it too for sure but at that point so now everyone's going at first they're going well

he has a lot of like mental disease so a lot of people are saying, oh, he has CTE, and they're jumping to all these conclusions, like, oh, he's such a piece of shit, and then other people are like, wow, he's finally, someone's standing up to this fucking patriarchy of like, shut the fuck up and play,

we're paying you a lot of money, we don't care if you get hurt. I don't think you know what patriarchy means, but go on. Huh? I don't think you understand what patriarchy means. He thinks it's the football team, the Patriots.

Yeah, and they're under the archie over in St. Louis. Patriarchy is about men. So you can't have a patriarchy within a male-dominated, like a solely male industry. You know what I mean? There's some trainers that are women. Anyhow. They would be able to talk about the patriarchy but a man can't

say there's the he's tired of the patriarchy so what do we do this is maybe a like a hierarchy there we go that's good there you go good so anyways now people are questioning now this guy also there's a lot he's been accused of sexual assault. He's a rapper on the side. Oh, how dare he? I know. That's the lie. He's accused of sexual assault.

He raps. Okay, okay. No, but he has a lot of off-field, he had a lot of off-field situations. So where does the story end? So the story ends with, do we believe, well, here's a question, right?

If someone has repeated behavior that's apparently negative and they're lying and it's it is like the boy that cries wolf because then it's like okay so he's lied about all this shit he's fucked up so many times let's go to the x-ray go to the x-ray let's see let's see the x-ray of his ankle let's see what's going on i guess yeah i guess he has to show. I guess he has to show his ankle. And show the receipts of the texts. Show the texts that he knows. Yeah.

Yeah, because I feel like... But don't you think a lot of people don't... Why would you get cut for having a bad ankle? Or would you get cut for lying about... Yeah, for lying, saying it's hurt more than it is, and not going in the game. Yeah, this guy has had enough. Whoever cut him had enough of this guy's bullshit.

Yes. He didn't want him on the team in the first place. Tom Brady vouched for him. Well, that's what happens when you're a liar. You don't get trusted when you actually need help potentially, and that's the fallout from being a fucking liar. But this is what they do. They go, oh, we feel so bad for him.

I hope we're here for him. They spin it to make him seem like he's crazy. Well, everyone's crazy. That's what I'm saying. Everything that you could ever say about someone is because of something going on in their brain that they did not choose to happen. Yes. So this is back to the Sam Harris thing of no free will.

When someone shoots up, does a mass shooting and they go to the autopsy and they see their brain and it's riddled with cte you go that's because he had cte that wasn't his fault or if someone murders a bunch of people and they're declared insane it's not their fault they don't you know they're not eligible for the death penalty but literally anything you do is because something is going on in your brain that you don't know i know but isn't it annoying that that they get to then spin him as a liar and oh we feel bad for him and i hope he gets help it's a way for for them to not be responsible the hierarchy for them to go oh we didn't fire him he's making shit up whatever like well they they should have empathy for this

monotonic liar because i mean that it mean, even people that are so bad, he can't help that he's a fucking liar and that he grew up with parents and a brain and a situation that made him into this person that has to continually lie and manipulate. Well, the other thing too is they hired him. Are they coddling him?

They won the Super Bowl last year. He was fine then. He was in line then yeah and now that he only has four touchdowns he has a decent like uh season going on yeah they're already winning without him like then they go okay so now now you have issues yeah last season you have issues and also do you keep him playing football to protect him you know from himself you know what i mean like because without this like sense of like passion and direction is he gonna go and fucking be really nuts you know what i mean like i don't know it's oh you keep him playing football

to protect him yeah no i don't think they care about that they're not like mitigating yeah potential losses on the outside for other like let's keep him away from hurting his partners by having him go to practice more. No, they don't care about that. They don't give a fuck. No, no, no. Let's get to Fanthrax. I'm gonna have you count to three.

Oh, I'm so excited to hear from you guys. What do we have today, Noah? All right. We'll kick things off with a message from Stevie. Hi, Nikki, Andrew, and Noah. My name is Stevie, and I've been wanting to call into the podcast almost every time there's something that you guys say that resonates with me or advice that I really take to heart. But finally, what's instigating my voicemail today is a mispronunciation that I had. I drive around a lot for work and was pulling into a neighborhood and checking in with the gate attendant there and gave the street name Pamela and was driving through the neighborhood after they let me in. And I saw the names on the streets were like Catherine Street and Jackie Street. And I realized it was Pamela Street, not Pamela.

So that made me kind of feel pretty dumb. And I hope you guys appreciate that. So anyways, love you guys. And Jag-jerky. Jag-jerky? I bet it was a Thanksgiving. Around Thanksgiving is when she love that pomela you know what though i don't hate it i don't hate it no first of all i kind of like how that sounds also why are all the streets named after like first names that's kind of

weird too street yeah that was no you don't want to live on that street no no one wants to live in that development court no court i know one guy named court oh court's a good name i kind of like it yeah what about stevie for a girl i love stevie nicks yes it's so good it's such a cool it's like sheila it's like an 80s like cool badass chick wearing shoulder pads in her blazer yeah i, I don't mind Pamela. I think, what was it, Pamela? Pamela. Pamela. She called it Pamela. Yeah, like Parmesan. Yeah. Instead of street,

she said saint, because she thought it was like St. Louis. When you write St. Louis, oh, is this the question you had? St. Louis is very annoying, and when you put it in the airplane thing on Southwest, they go, you can't have apost Southwest they go it doesn't show up you can't have apostrophes

it doesn't show up or you can't have a punctuation so the ST like period sometimes you just gotta write ST yes

sometimes you gotta write the whole saint it won't show up that's bullshit it sucks maybe because of St. Croix there's other saints

I mean I'm just saying like is that why I don't know I don't know anyhow but STL what were you gonna say how do i write it how do you write it yeah st you call our our street i'm not gonna say

we're our street but you constantly mispronounce that yeah and it's just the way it is it's like my buddy has the last name l-e-m-b-o and i say limbo l-e-m-b-o l-e-m-b-o so it's limbo right limbo limbo but you say limbo yeah like l-i yeah i just consistently do it well at first i just that was so it's similar to our what about in uh in new york uh houston street you got to say houston at first you say houston yeah you definitely say yeah and then it just becomes houston and you just never – there's one neighborhood in L.A. though that I constantly cannot pronounce right. But why did they do that with Houston? To be like – I think it's probably named after someone where their last name was pronounced Houston.

I think it's to be bougie and not be Houston. Houston, we have a problem because I don't know how. It's like how people pronounce Lebanon, Lebanon. Lebanon. Lebanon. Steve Lebanon. Stevie Lebanon. Lebanon. Lebanon? Steve Lebanon? Stevie Lebanon? All right.

Noah, what's the next one? All right. Here's one. He didn't leave a name, but wants some advice. Hey, Nikki, Noah, and Andrew. I love the podcast. I used to watch your SiriusXM and the U.S. podcast, so I'm a big fan. I've recently decided that I want to cut back on how much I drink

specifically, um, not drinking during the week. Um, and so I read the first third of Alan Carr book that you recommended, but if I'm honest, it just didn't really do a whole lot for me. I feel like I didn't really get what he was getting at and he just kind of talked in circles and please don't be mad at me for saying that because I know it's helped you and a lot of people. So I was just interested in hearing if you had any other resources or suggestions that had helped you also what helped um andrew and uh noah kind of get their drinking under control um i really liked how you talked about how it isn't liquid courage because if it wasn't firemen and police officers would be uh drinking it to go and do

their job but they don't so that was really um helpful and powerful so thank you for that and i love the podcast and i'm going to keep listening and i hope you get this voicemail yes um do you have anything for him because i know you didn't read the alan carr book what what has helped you what uh i saw the cover um. What has helped you? I saw the cover. You read a third of the cover. I read a third. I read Al. One book.

So I think that it depends how much he's drinking during the week. I think a lot of people justify it. I think he's probably drinking enough to feel sick in the morning because otherwise it wouldn't be a problem. Well, that's the thing. Just because you're not feel sick in the morning because otherwise it wouldn't be a problem. Well, that's the thing. Like just because you're not being sick in the morning, it still can be a sickness, I guess. I guess that's the advice I'd give him. Like maybe it's not impeding on his life other than the fact that he just wants to stop, you know?

So I don't know. I think like you just got to – what I would do is I would write down what are the pros and what are the cons and literally write down like what am I getting out of this? Because that's what the Alan Carr book is about is about anything you think you're getting out of it, he proves it wrong. likes it because obviously that the thing about it makes you current like it gives you social skills that you don't you normally lack and having courage that resonated because it doesn't give you courage it just makes you stupider um i think that something that i wouldn't that is not in that book that i would advise that's helped me for the other things i've quit without that book is um when you do it like don't say you're not gonna drink like don't make these things of like i'm not drinking monday through thursday or sunday through thursday yeah like

don't have these black and white things just play it by ear and when you want to have a drink during the week and you're feeling this like already like guilt bubbling up of like oh I shouldn't be doing this don't just do it just do what you want right now just truly do what you want and be like I need this I want this I need it I'm not hurting anyone like I'm not choosing to do this because I want to hurt myself or anyone else I clearly need this right now and fucking just enjoy it and do what you want without any guilt um that to me i think is the true first step of cutting back because the shame around drinking and the shame you feel when you when you have that first drink and then you go well if i had one i already broke the seal let's fucking go wild if you just are like i just want i just want it and i just don't like for me quitting

pot was the same way i just like kept trying to like make all these rules for myself and every time i would break one i would feel so bad that i would just smoke all the pot and i would feel terrible but when i first started just being like i just want it and that's okay like i'm not a bad person because i want to smoke a little weed right now like i'm not doing it this isn't because i want to like hurt anyone or even myself i just want to take the power out of it you just take the shame out of it take this just do it because you want to do it and i swear to god when you start getting in the habit because you're not obviously ready to quit right now to the guy that was calling in and that's fine like you fucking need it still and it will fall away when it's

ready to if you take the shame out of needing it now because there's nothing wrong with needing it right now the other thing too is you know when i was drinking there'd be times where i'd get so fucked up on the weekends like it sounds like he's a weekend warrior too because he's like i'm not gonna stop drinking on the weekends that you would want to drink on maybe a Monday or Tuesday, just a little bit, just to kind of soothe that. Yeah. You know what I mean?

So like your problem during the week could be stemmed from what you're doing on the weekend. So maybe if you could control the weekend a little bit, maybe it won't. Not saving it all up for the weekend because like, well, that's the other thing too. So just drink whatever the fuck you want.

That's what I would tell this guy. Let yourself slowly it will go away when it's ready to you're not ready to let it go and that is so okay like it's not time for you yet and you'll know when it is and i know that you even wanting like you know sniffing around it and being like what what is this and reading the book and like being interested you're obviously it's eventually gonna be there for you but it isn't now i wish that someone would have given me that advice with pot because i've just spent years hating myself over using it when i knew i wanted to quit instead of just fucking enjoying the fact that i was doing it because i was just i wasn't ready and it fell away as soon as I let go of the shame of doing it

I swear to god it didn't take long for me to just go just laugh at yourself and go I guess I need this and let yourself have it because there's no point in doing it if you're not going to enjoy it yeah I didn't quit drinking you know a lot of people are like what's your rock bottom I didn't quit after fucking having 50 shots and making a guy count to three. For some people, a rock bottom is the moment where you realize it's done. I'm just saying,

but for me, what happened was, like you said, it wasn't really that big of a deal. I didn't feel a ton of shame around drinking. I was just tired of it. I wasn't giving it anything. I quit after having literally

a half of a tall boy Coors Light. Yeah. That was the last time I ever drank. Yeah. Because I was just like, what am I doing? Why am I – I'm tired. I'm more tired. Yes.

I'm just like – it's just like, eh. It'll be – It's not really doing anything for me. I really think – I'm not going out. I'm not fucking like raging. Like it's not – It'll be easy to – it will be easy for you – it will be easier than you think to

quit when you're actually ready to do it. And that's not, you know, when I quit my eating disorder behavior, it was not easy. It was a struggle and it was never like, but the thing is, I was ready to do it. I just knew I was ready and I knew I didn't have an option. This guy that's called in, you seem like you're not at a point where you're like, I'm out of options. You didn't hit like a gross bottom. You don't seem like you're tired of it yet because you want to try to still like do it on the weekend.

Just don't do any rules for yourself for now. Like for now, dude, truly enjoy it and with no judgment of yourself because I have no judgment of you wanting to drink during the week. Don't make rules for yourself. No rules. That is, I want you to try that out and get back to me and see what happens.

And it truly – because there's no point in drinking if you're not going to enjoy it. Like just stop this. If you're doing something right now that you feel bad about, overeating, smoking pot, whatever you're doing that you know you shouldn't, just enjoy it. Because there's going to be a time where you don't do it and you're going to miss it. So just enjoy it right now. Why lump shame onto it?

And here's the thing. I still miss it. It's not like it goes away either. I think a lot of people think, oh, you quit. And it's like, oh, you did it. It's like,

I still have these same exact thoughts. I still fucking, sometimes want to just get fucking hammered on the weekend and like, I could just do it. you know, like so much Like so much behind you to prove that that's not gonna bring but that's also another thing that I I hate about sobriety Sometimes it's like the key thing because that's their shame behind that. That's like another thing of like well

That's what i'm saying If you wanted to drink someday, I would not if you told me I drank last night I would literally go. Okay So what and I would still let you say that you were sober and that you had years i wouldn't give you shit because i know the second you start being feeling bad about something is the second you're gonna use it all the more let's get the final thoughts and uh what's our what's our last fanthrax? Okay, last fanthrax is from Cora. Hey, Nikki. I was listening to your podcast late last night while I couldn't sleep,

and I heard you guys talking about men's vulnerability when they're horny, and it reminded me of this guy I talked to for a while. I was drunk one night with friends and wanted to prove this very thing, so I decided to text him and lightly flirted with him. This turned into an easy way to get attention from a guy without actually having to see him or hook up with him i told him multiple times that i'd hook up with him which even prompted him to come to my parents house and wait outside for 30 minutes as i told him i didn't want to sneak out of my house oh my god we talked for almost two years and the only reason it ended was when i

started dating my current boyfriend recalling that experience reminded me of that weird female sense of empowerment and control. I'm so sad I missed your Denver show especially considering it was your special taping but I hope to see you whenever you come back to Colorado. I love you and your podcast and you are by far the best dating show host and you added so much needed intelligent humor to the show i hope y'all are doing well and thank you for the sense of friendship you've created with your fans love y'all oh she like read it like a letter dude i love when they write it out it's so sweet um that's i've done that so many times of where i just like i don't know if it's about the edging it's not about the control which i like that she was like in control there sometimes it's

for me where i've gotten a guy to like be like i'll i'll go go there and then they show up and you're like oh i don't i'm not like my vagina might be weird or like i i just i'm too nervous to hook up or whatever like i just make a lie and I'm like, I can't because my dog is sick or whatever. You just, but it's about just wanting to get the attention of like someone would. And like sometimes I just want to keep it, I want to keep intimacy away.

I just want to keep it on text. Now, do you think that's leading someone on? Like is that something negative with that to lead someone on even if maybe they're getting off on being let on I feel like that I feel like this guy did not he was not invited to go over

to her house because I feel like she probably he probably just showed up then that's not on her but if she were like come over if she did that knowing she was going to turn him down yeah that kind of sucks but i i've done it where i'm like yeah i want to do it and then it like well yeah that's a different thing and you're like no oh my god i like that's

always my biggest fear is that i'm going to start hooking up with someone and i'll think i'm into it and then in the middle of it i'll stop wanting it and then i'll keep doing it out of like feelings bad but there's also something to it where it's like, she, you know, she obviously writes well. Like there's gotta be like a feeling of like, like dopamine of like getting this person to do just from my words. You know what I mean? I mean, that's kind of sexy in a way.

It's so sexy. I made this guy wait 30 minutes because I used the right like emoji. Oh, and it's so scary that, you know what's so scary is when you get a guy so like there are times where with my the guy i'm seeing now i will and i probably talked about this before i will not want him to finish because i won't want to lose that energy that i have cultivated from him being horny and i know as soon as he comes it'll is his like interested me in that way will be faded like when we were in hawaii like we hooked up one night

before we went to dinner and i was like dude i don't want you to finish because i wanted him to be like all over me at dinner like i wanted that like but then he started fucking his chicken i just never i could see him just like fucking the mashed potatoes because he got a... He started fucking one of the fish because, you know. COVID knows. Couldn't smell it. No, I...

Is there... Noah, do you relate to that? Like knowing that when guys come, they're just not going to be as like hands all over you. And it's almost like Christmas Eve. Like I never want Christmas to end. I never want the good the anticipation to end there is something I

don't know what I think Cora was getting at like she just enjoyed the guy having the hots for her but she didn't want to really reciprocate and it was on him to just stop because it will go away yeah I just feel bad for that guy a little bit because I do think like then it's like the next time someone

like i don't know it's just gonna it's gonna hinder things that are yeah i know it's gonna hinder him though from like having tried like it's gonna be he can learn from that and you know be a little less aggressive like don't keep your car running i mean yeah it's it's tricky though because i have trust issues by guys coming and then being disinterested in me. And not just, you know, not touching me all over at dinner, but like truly being like, I don't want to be with you anymore. I do notice. Because all of this was based, me saying I wanted to be with you was all based on the fact I wanted to fuck you. And now I got to and it's just like, I don't like you anymore.

And I just go, what? There is something about like that first texting too that's like the sexting and like before you have sex it is so fucking hot and then even but even like the month of like then we're gonna fuck again yeah period is just so like if i wrote a sex to brenna right now she'd be like are you is something happened are you is this for someone else? Because this is not our vibe. Our vibe is, did you like fucking put the boxes away? Yes. Oh, that's so cute. You know, like.

Yeah, it used to be about her box. But maybe I should spice it up like that again somehow. But maybe tell her before. Well, today I was going through Instagram. I just pulled it up and there was a video of Chris on his morning show that came up. Yeah. Juggling. And I was just like oh and i was

like oh my god that guy's so fucking hot like my first thing was like who the fuck is that and i i wrote to him i was like it is such a nice surprise to be like my mouth went was a gape at how hot this guy was and then i realized he's the guy that i'm seeing like it was such a good feeling that and there's been times where I've told him like I've seen pictures of him just like that or I'll see like him at a store where we've like kind of moved and he'll try on a shirt and so he'll be and I'll go like whoa that guy's hot or I see him on Instagram or whatever and I go it makes me go like who's that guy and I go I want you just to know though like if I do have that response to a guy like I'm not gonna like

attempt to like hook up with that person I like I had to assuage his fears of like me not trying to fuck him in a situation I'm not gonna fuck you behind your back behind your back he was like I appreciate you saying that because a little part of me is like why is she getting so

turned on by people she thinks are other people I went through that yesterday because I went to Brenna's work I got a facial and you came out of the place and then you saw her well no she was working there she's like behind the desk and like oh my god i want to like i want to fuck this receptionist like and like she was like going through like the list of like because i had to fill out some forms she's like fill out these forms i'm like i was getting i was like is there a j i literally said is there a janitor closet because like i was so fucking turned on yesterday that's so great it was you got sometimes got to see your partner outside of like your daily shit like you gotta like that's a big

reflection in a mirror what was that noah what andrew just said is a big uh point that ester perel makes yeah to see your partner in like other worlds oh my god i have been in other jobs loving esther perel's podcast where should we begin i've listened to it so much it is just coupling couples and couple uh couples counseling sessions and the the one that i listened to yesterday that i really recommend is like um let me just look at it so people can check it out because it was so, I want to know what people think about this girl. I don't mean to be mean, but that was the name of the episode.

I don't mean to be mean, but, and I mean, all of them are so good, but they're, they're not couples she's been seeing for a long time. It's one off deals. She doesn't see them again.

It's just one session. And it's, it's, and then this is session. She kind of loses her cool and she gets sucked into their relationship and starts kind of like acting like the girl she starts she at one point she realizes like she's yelling at the girl for being dismissive of the guy and bossing him around and she goes in that moment she's like you know commentating on her therapy and she's like

in this moment i realized what i was telling her not to do i was doing directly to her sometimes as a therapist you think you are getting through to them like it's interesting to hear a therapist talk about being a therapist it's like i didn't know there was like it's like a movie when they like have director yes it's it's she's so good um you got to check it out so it's where should we begin esther p Perel, E-S-T-E-R Perel, and that's I Don't Mean to be Mean But is the episode. So we'll see you tomorrow or Monday

on the show. Don't be cool out there. And Jack Be Nimble, Jack Be Quick. Oh, that one is good. There's two. I should have saved the other second one. No. Jack Be Quick doesn't work on its own. Or will it?

On Monday. We shall see. One bell. Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt.

And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes

on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same,

our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, and now, Minnie Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including

Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Listen to many questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. Tune in and join in the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network,

iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. We want to speak out and we want this to stop. Wow, very powerful. I'm Ellie Flynn, an investigative journalist, and this is my journey deep into the adult entertainment industry. I really wanted to be a player boy in my adult.

He was like, I'll take you to the top, I'll make you a star. To expose an alleged predator and the rotten industry he works in. It's honestly so much worse than I had anticipated. We're an army in comparison to him. From Novel, listen to The Bunny Trap on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.