The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #274 Resalg Ikkin

Episode Date: October 4, 2022

Nikki premieres her new voice and she sounds like her old...young self again. Anya Marina joins her and Andrew and there is no shortage of silliness. They talk about bizarre fan requests, their creative process and missing good tv and film. You Heard It Here First, your breath affects your dog's mood and Taylor Swift's reveals details about a new song. In theTop1 Bottom1 game they revisit old technologies.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch

your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors,

it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Sheckner, Billy Porter, and so many more.

Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You've got to check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You are cordially invited to the hottest party in professional sports.

I'm Tisha Allen, former golf professional and the host of Welcome to the Party, your newest obsession about the wonderful world that is women's golf. Featuring interviews with top players on tour, tips to help improve your swing, and the craziest stories to come out of your friendly neighborhood country club. Welcome to the Party with Tisha Allen is an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Welcome to the Party, that's P-A-R-T-E-E, on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love. That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. With a blend of humor, vulnerability, and authenticity, we share our personal journeys navigating our 30s, tackling the complexities of modern relationships, and engage in thought-provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. guests to relatable stories that will resonate with your experiences. Decisions Decisions is going to be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get ready to reshape your understanding of relationships and embrace the freedom of authentic connections. Tune in and join in the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. Here's Nikki. Hello, here I am. It's the Nikki Glaser podcast. I'm Nikki Glaser. This is my new voice. Welcome to the show. I'm back, fully recovered, and yeah, happy to be back.

I didn't know it would be so soon, but it's here. And if you don't think I sound different, keep that opinion to yourself. I don't want to hear it because I spent $45,000 on this voice. And yeah, so it's back. What do you think? It doesn't sound any different. I know. I knew you were going to say that. No, no, I didn't.

No, it does. First of all, it sounds much worse. Out of the gate, the tone is not good. He did not fix my tone. It's still going to be impatient and ornery. But there's a brightness to the overall quality yes no i do hear a little bit of a higher pitch i really do i i think it probably is closer to what your voice was originally yeah it's not like when i first talked in the office the other day yeah i sat i was like this is what i sounded like in high school. It was just like, I have not heard this person for decades.

Is it weird hearing your voice after three weeks? Does it sound? Well, it was just weird hearing a new voice because this to me is, I'm used to it right now because I've heard it for four days now, three days now. So I'm used to it. But especially in the speaker where you're hearing it back no um no because i feel like it's a little bit like there are times like i can just if what i describe it as is before i was driving a car that like an old i can only picture as like

my old mercedes in high school it was like in 1977 and you push on the gas and it would just take so long to go like and then you could get to the speed that you want it's like the first time i drove a nice lexus lexus yeah i can't say lexus they took that from me they gave me whatever you have would you like to say a nice toyota just to my tongue on both sides wait what would you like to use your new voice to introduce our guest? Yes, I would love to. Welcome to the show. My best friend, you hear her every time our show starts doing the podcast theme song.

She has a Patreon that you can support. She has music that you can support on Spotify. Her name is Anya Marina. Welcome to the show, Anya. Hey, guys. Hey, girl. Anya heard my voice maybe first. Yeah, I heard it.

I have the voice memo. It's so good. It's like, hey, guys. It's Nikki. This is my new voice. I was like, this is the Nikki I met in 2012 when we became roommates. Yeah.

It did sound that way. Like I, I can go back to hearing myself on comedy central, like on my show, not safe. And it had not dropped yet. But it just told you this, but you sound so much like my favorite.

One of my favorite albums is Liz fair on iTunes originals, talking about her songs. So she does like a song and then we'll talk about it. And she has this clear, like sweet, mellifluous voice. And it's like ASMR for me. And your voice sounded like that. It's just like, I expected you to be like, I wrote Fuck and Run in-

I wrote Fuck and Run. I mean, I can do a better Anya now. Like I can do a better Anya now. Like it's easy. My goal when I first started talking in the office because they were filming me for the Graham Bensinger show this show that's been following me around through this process

he filmed me like going into the surgery doing interviews before it and then not during it but he was there they were there when I started talking again I wanted to go like hi everyone like i wanted to come out talking like this and just everyone be like what the fuck um what is it different is it different but it kind of did sound like that it was so it's a little bit i talked too much this weekend and it just i'm not ready to be talking

as much as i have been so it's a little bit like horse today which is a disappointment because i wanted to debut it and have it be different but it was the thing is it like i like i was giving the analogy for the car it's like it just you know the first time you drive a nice car and you just put you gently tap and it just smoothly like goes as fast as you want to the car to go on the gas like it's just so there's no effort behind it so is there a clearness in your throat when you talk or is it was there something that was that you ever felt no you don't feel anything you don't feel you don't feel yeah like um there's no nerves there so there was no

pain you know during the surgery or anything it's just what I feel is that and I'm gonna have to relearn how to speak because I was giving so I was pushing I was driving that old car so I was constantly like shoving my foot down on the gas for everything I said there's so much effort when you don't have a good voice behind talking that and anytime you you know it's just constant you don't realize how much because it's all you know so you don't realize how much you're fucking fighting to get uh sound out of your body and so i'm still doing that really hot like i'm still slamming on the gas and like i don't need to like it just like comes out like it's just like there it's not i don't have to search for it i don't have to like dig for it and be like getting ready for this and in terms of singing like i'm not gonna sing but it is insane like i can sing every

olivia rodrigo song at the at the you know like what at the way she sings it i usually when i play it on guitar i have to take it down like seven octaves i'm not kidding you every taylor swift song every single yeah i can hit adele notes like i can hit every note there hasn't been a note i cannot hit yet and i'm not kidding you before wait the first weekend you can talk you're singing adele well i was just like you know gently to myself like i just love the idea doing my makeup. So I do Pavarotti now. I've been doing Pavarotti for like 15 hours. That's just Mariah Carey whistle tone. I have so many questions.

Can anyone benefit from this surgery, you think? Or just people who have had hemorrhaged cords? I mean, I think anyone, but it's, you know, unless you need it and want to, like, unless if you talk for a living, yes. Yes, absolutely. Talk or sing for a living. I'm picturing it like, is it like a boat that collects barnacles and they just scrape the barnacles off for like a cervix that has HPV?

They look like, when you look at them on, it's exactly that, Anya. When you look at cords on the screen, they look like a pair of jeans. Like, there's two sides to it they look like jeans and like my original cords look like cargo pants that have a bunch of pockets stuffed with keys and like rocks all the way down like your actual pants yes and then well wait what do i have pants i don't know i had this weird memory of like, Nikki having all this stuff in her pants. When did I have stuff in my pants? What?

Everyone's been talking about it for a while. Well, like men. I mean, I'm flattered. Like men have a lot of stuff in their pants. Yeah, like a guy that's like working as like backstage at a music festival. Like how much crap, like a guy that's like a roadie like backstage at a music festival like how much crap like a guy that's like a roadie that's his pants right and then my cords now look like skinny jeans they look like they're going to like the warp tour in 2008 they are perfectly perfect like straight lines on

each side and so it's just and it looks like there was no surgery. There's no like scars. There's nothing. And they just look like, like I was just gazing at them. Like they're so straight because before they were all like calloused and they looked like the Great Barrier Reef and now they look like the Great Barrier Reef now, which has nothing on it. But the Great Barrier Reef sounds fantastic.

So they don't use, they don't use knives, right? Just lasers? They do. Yeah, they do both. So they use lasers to fix all the hemorrhaged blood vessels. I like how she said knives and not scalpels. Yeah. Well, they look like little raptors that go like,

there's these little things that he would use that are millimeter. I mean, on the screen uh you know magnified by like 100 200 times but they use these tiny little things and then yeah they they pull back the layer they used to just cut off the lesions and now they dissect the skin lift the first layer of skin go in and take out the damage and then put the skin back on top and then that's why it has so long to um heal but maybe there's like a cheaper version you can get if you don't have like there certainly is but you might have a voice like julie andrews which is no voice if you get that done i mean that's the way they used to do it this guy invented this surgery because they used to just cut them off okay gotcha and so he invented this kind of surgery because um in high school he

got a job as he was like uh he like worked with leather sewing leather and he like used and he used he learned how to be ambidextrous because this surgery is impossible to do unless you can use both your left and right hand oh the same way so because he did that leather work in high school, he learned how to use both hands interdependently and together. And so he was able to develop the surgery that it's imperative that you are able to use. So it's like if you want to do the surgery, you've got to learn how to use your left hand. Yeah. So he learned how to do that in high school. And then from that, he's like, I should be a surgeon because I'm so technical.

That's crazy. His dad was a surgeon. So he went to school and he wanted to, he was an ENT. And then he was doing all cancer surgeries. Like, you know, just taking cancer off of people's throats and larynxes and all the things. And then he, yeah, he started working with singers. And I think was just like, there's got to be another way. And then Julie Andrews got her voice really effed up by a doctor that kind of just went in and cut all the stuff up.

And then she couldn't sing anymore. And he, it was one of his first, you know, success stories that he repaired her voice. And she can't, you know, sing like she used to, but she is able to work. And she's like 89 or something now and still working. Oh, wow. Your doctor repaired her botched surgery my doctor report every single singer that you know and like my doctor has touched and i can't say that i can't tell you all the names right i'm not kidding you going to his office is like

walking into a planet hollywood it's every single every single chord he has touched. Jim Crocker? And the thing is, singers don't want to admit that they've had it done. What's his name? Crocker? No one sings like this. Jim Crocker, isn't it?

There's Croche. Have I told you lately? Oh, that's... The guy that sang the... What would you do? What was his name? I feel like that was his name joe crocker yeah james crocker i don't know i'm screaming you yeah you all being singers how do you feel

when someone puts on the rasp like it's not a real rasp i feel like a fake rasp is that wasn't fake his wasn't fake i mean he sounded like a trash can all the time but But I'm talking, you know, like someone that talks like this and then they start singing and they're like, Well, we've talked about this on the show. Your mom does that. Everyone does. They have to choose what they want to sound like. So everything's kind of put on in a way.

Like no one, even singing's put on. I mean, no one naturally talks like that. Like everything's a put on. So I think that. I guess it's the extra put on. I mean, no one naturally talks like that. Everything's a put on. So I think that. I guess it's the extra put on. Have you come across raspy singers, Anya? I did just watch Don't Look Back, which is so good.

The Bob Dylan documentary. Have you guys seen that? Mm-mm. I really liked you telling us about it on the girls chat. Highly recommend. It never changes. It goes by so quickly. He is the same.

It's like that is kind of how he talks. I always thought it was a put on. But it's kind of once you watch him speak and then he goes into his singing, you're like, it's not that different. And it's just such a wild. He's so young and so like full of, I don't know, this weird energy. He's fucking with everybody, all the journalists that come into his room. And then it just reminds me so much of Nikki on tour and just people pulling you in so many different directions.

Like, hey, really quick in the green room, can you meet my five sons? They're real big fans. And you're going to come to our cabin next time you're in town. And just this whole rigmarole you have to go through our cabin next time you're in town and just this whole rigmarole you have to go through. I highly recommend you watch it. I just want to tell everyone

right now, I will never go to a second location with you after a show no matter who you are. I love meeting everyone. I'm not kidding you.

I love my fans. You guys are normal people. I would be friends with you if it was different. Like, we would be friends who hang out. I have, I enjoy my fans. You guys are normal people. I would be friends with you if it was different. Like, we would be friends who hang out. I enjoy our conversations when we do the meet and greets. I'm never going to go stay at your house. And some of you are like, who would ask you to stay at their house?

Who would ask you to go to dinner before the show with strangers you don't know? The venue owner or, like like the venue manager who's like it happens so and you know what it's so sweet because there are comedians that do do that because they're alcoholics and they need people to drink with okay so you're probably like well bert came over and drank with us before the show and after the show he was here for a month yeah he slept on our couch for a year um i'm never gonna do that and it's not because i'm think i'm better than you or because i don't like you or i don't think or i wouldn't do that normally if i lived in boston and we could be friends i would i just can't when i'm on the road

and it's just not gonna happen so um you know you know the one time i'll do it is if my friends are gonna get laid maybe from it then i'll go and i'll go i will go to support you to go hang out with these girls will you open for me at the bar after the show for like five minutes like when i was on the road and it used to be like you were single and a meal and stuff and i was i would get sad when you guys wouldn't invite me because i'm like i want to do you know this will help like i feel like these girls know that we're not they want to hang out with nikki yeah we were afraid nikki wouldn't sleep with then i'd have to blow me as long as i have my friends with me i will go and as long as there's another purpose there besides me being like having to entertain absolutely

i'll go um but i'm not gonna go um to your favorite vegan cafe before the show i don't have time i usually here's how it goes i usually fly in at about like three around then is like after a day of travel we get in at like three i have to start getting ready at 5 30 so by the time i get to my hotel it's usually four and then i don't have time to go to your favorite smoothie place and get a vegan thing like and but it is sweet when you recommend stuff because we do order food every night from places so if you do have recommendations for good vegan places near a venue please send those but some people are like yes you gotta come to my cafe. And sometimes it's like my barbecue joint.

And I'm like, do you know me? Or did you watch one roast clip? And then you go, is it by the venue? No, it's six hours south of here. It's cool though. Like it's a cool vibe. I'm sure you'll dig it. Yes.

And I have like two friends that kind of know who you are. So they'd love to meet you. No, they don't like you at all yeah they actually don't like yeah they hate you but i think that if you met them in person we could just fuck with them a little bit and by the way can we also this is another popular request that i don't know why people do it i would never have guessed it was a normal thing no more asking to make videos for your friend who didn't want to come yeah yeah where i where i shit talk him and go you motherfucker you didn't come to

the fucking show you piece of shit you poor piece of shit who had to work because you have a fucking daughter to support like you always want me to roast your friend who couldn't afford to come or who doesn't like me yeah and it's just i i was reading this new yorker article about um shane gillis and there was this one part where someone in it comes up to him and asks them to make a video for someone who didn't come to the show and i was so envious of shane because he just goes no i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna be mean to your friend and i always take the bait and I always make the fucking video and I know for a fact that person's like why is she

so mad at me because it's funny in theory that you are like coming from you to your friend this would be funny but from your friend to your friend from a person that they probably do like and just couldn't make the time or it wasn't important enough to spend the money

it's just like aggressive and I'll never get that person to like me again because it doesn't really it comes off like the tone is not right there's no real left turn joke it'll just be like you're fucking loser it's one per meet and greet people ask me to do this and i you would i think because you're a rose comedian i think that's like where people are coming from. They're like, be. People are going to think I'm such an asshole for saying all these things. Please still ask me to do funny videos for people. And I'll just tell you no. I'm not going to be like, you dumb piece of shit.

I'm not going to roast you in that moment. I'm just going to say no. But I'm going to start saying no a little bit more. No is good. I'm going to save these pipes. And with that, let's go to break. And we'll be back with more. Andrew.

Coming around all day and night. Coming soon. Got to save these pipes. And with that, let's go to break and we'll be back with more. Andrew. Coming around all day and night. Coming soon. 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're the hosts of How To Money.

We want to be with you every step of the way in your financial journey this year, offering the information and insights you need to thrive financially. Yeah, whether you find yourself up to your eyeballs in student loan debt, or you've got a sky-high credit card balance because you went a little overboard with the holiday spending, or maybe you're looking to optimize your retirement accounts so you can retire early, well, How to Money will help you to change your relationship with money so you can stress less and well, How to Money will help you to change your relationship with money so you can stress less and grow your net worth. That's right. How to Money comes out three times a week, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for money advice without the judgment and jargon. Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show

and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I started to live a double life when I was a teenager.

Responsible and driven and wild and out of control. My head is pounding. I'm confused. I don't know why I'm in jail. It's hard to understand what hope is when you're trapped in a cycle of addiction. Addiction took me to the darkest places. I had an AK-47 pointed at my head. But one night, a new door opened, and I made it into the rooms of recovery. The path would have roadblocks and detours, stalls and relapses. But when I was feeling the most lost, I found hope with community.

And I made my way back. This season, join me on my journey through addiction and recovery. A story told in 12 steps. Listen to CRIMS as part of the Michael Lura Podcast Network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Tisha Allen, former golf professional and the host of Welcome to the Party, your newest obsession about the wonderful world that is women's golf. Featuring interviews with top players on tour

like LPGA superstar Angel Yen. I really just sat myself down at the end of 2022 and I was like, look, either we make it or we quit. Expert tips to help improve your swing

and the craziest stories to come out of your friendly neighborhood country club. The drinks were flowing, twerking all over the place, vaping, they're shotgunning. Women's golf is a wild ride full of big personalities, remarkable athleticism, fierce competition, and a generation of women hell-bent on shanking that glass ceiling. Welcome to the Party with Tisha Allen is an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to welcome to the party.

That's P A R T E E on the I heart radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcast presented by capital one founding partner of I heart women's sports. Some people won't give you the real talk on drugs, but it's time. We know the facts. Fentanyl is often laced into illicit drugs and used to make fake versions of prescription pills.

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have any more i'm trying to think like it's usually let's get fucked up after the show they come up to you and i think it's sad to because i feel like they have a whole idea of like, I'm going to go up to him. I'm going to say I have weed and maybe cocaine and we get some beers. And like they probably thought about this maybe three days beforehand to be like, and then he'll come out. We're going to have the best time ever. That's the kind of person he is. He loves to get fucking after it after a show. And then I just see like a sadness sometimes in their face when

they're like oh you don't want to yeah fucking ruin your life tonight well they don't know you that well then too because you don't i mean i guess you do drink now but you don't get like fucked no but there are stories where they're like yeah dude remember when you fucking party with little john let's do that tonight but instead of like going to a strip club and stuff, we'll just be at my house and look at each other in the eyes and do blow. And I'm like, I'm good, I think. I've gone to, I've gone out with fans before.

I mean, I've been doing this 20 years. And so I have definitely ended up at people's apartments and been attacked by their dogs. Wait, you got attacked by a dog? Yeah, this one girl's dog, this waitress at a comedy club in tampa her dog attacked me in the face and it bit my face was terrible yeah what what did you do she was like annoyed by me yeah yeah i mean it wasn't i wasn't like bleeding or anything but it it was because i narrowly

dodged getting bit and she like pulled him back but it was like it could have been a vicious attack and i was like oh god and then and this was before uber you know like this is 2005 six seven eight so i would just be stuck at these places and drunk and uh yeah i used to hang out after shows and um and then it got to be the point where i was a feature act and i just felt like if i went out with these people they would just tell me how good the headliner was and i didn't want to be around that so I didn't there was a time where a window where I would have gone out with people but I just didn't want to hear how much I sucked and so I would avoid that I really so much of my life is avoiding any kind of criticism the other day Anya sent me a clip because I was asking for, I need to post more clips on Instagram and everything.

And I hate watching myself. And so I was like asked on the girls chat that I have with all the girls from Girls Trip. You know, all the girls from the movie Girls Trip. Tiffany Haddish. Who else is in that movie? Jada Pinkett Smith. um oh was she in that was she like a bitchy white assistant or something yeah yeah okay she had a line that became a meme you go girl or something like that oh like a just cheesy white woman saying go girl

um but anya and i was like if you guys ever come across a clip of mine on YouTube that you think would be good on Instagram will you just like tell me the time stamp of it so I know and so Anya was like this one seven minutes and I go to look at it and you know how like usually on YouTube if I'm watching something of mine I put up my hand so I can't see any comments

I hide it I cover the screen but on this one I didn't because it was a compilation yeah I just like looking at my finger that doesn't have a ring on it yet just being like someday it does have a ring yeah it does actually we've had a million videos of uh the same video sent to us now i know of people have you tried that with the string yeah oh yeah i've tried the string one but the problem is this ring i have had a ring on my fingers for over six months, everyone. October 6th will be seven months.

Or no, October 8th will be seven months. Since FBoy Island season finale, that's the first time you will see it on my finger at the elimination ceremony. It won't come off. And I cannot do the string because it has has uh sharp edges on the side it's like a and so the string catches on the edges so that is i really don't mind it it's a part of me now i don't even want to get it off i don't even don't even send me solutions i don't care um but i do have rings on my ring finger i have several because it's my most delicate finger. It fits the most rings.

It's my favorite finger. It's the prettiest finger I have. And it's the only finger that fits a size, I don't know, six or five or whatever. Most of the rings I have are these size. And I think it's so rude that you can't use that finger. That's fucked up. And that men won't flirt with me if i've got or you know what they don't give a fuck men don't give a fuck if you're in a relationship i thought saying that i

was in a relationship would like take away a certain amount of attention i get from male suitors it doesn't if anything they come on stronger it's like because they they know you're unavailable you could be eight months pregnant and the guy's like what's up what are you doing uh i don't know having a baby in a week it's wild i still stand by the fact that i can't really like post about my boyfriend because i'll lose followers because that's how weird men are but knowing that they i have a boyfriend they still don't give a fuck and um and it you know it's that is something that I actually Chris would probably not like me to hear to say this but I don't want to stop being desired by men just because I'm unavailable you cannot fuck me but I hope you still try

it makes me feel pretty I don't really care Chris yeah I mean that's how way I feel when people want to fuck Chris just people groups of people um i feel complimented but what was i saying about um you were holding your hand up over the comments so yeah and then so i didn't do that on this one because it was a compilation and so i thought it's like they'll talk about someone else or i just wasn't on alert and of course the first fucking comment is i can't uh i would have led the best life if i never saw the second comic and i'm like who's this who's that person i'm like oh poor roy wood i'm like nope he's the first nikki is the second and it's just like but here's the problem because

i talked to chris about it and he goes that is such a lame thing to say it's such a classic internet thing it's almost like saying i don't like female comics of being like i could have got my whole life without seeing that because i was talking about my dog going down on me it's a hilarious bit for my special the half hour or not the half hour the stand-up good it's one of my favorites and it's all it's a layer it's so funny and i stand it. And you can hear my old voice on that. But Chris was like, it's just the lamest internet comment. That's like saying like I can has cheeseburgers. Like it's just like such a classic thing people write.

And it means nothing. And I go, the thing is, it does mean something. Because what it does, and this happens to me too, and I've talked about it before, when I watch a YouTube video and I see the first pinned thing, the most popular criticism of this, it affects how I view it. So I'm going to go straight to that second person and know this person I'm probably supposed to not like. And whether or not that makes me want to like them more or whether it makes me, it sets the tone for how people should feel about you. This is exactly why I am not partaking in this thing I got asked to do because it involves like a lot of comics with a lot of fans that have already probably don't like me.

And although so badly I want to be like accepted by those fans and want those fans to like me i turned it down because i'm like this is an opportunity for those those people that they're fans of to make fun of me and for them to set the tone of this is how we talk about nikki glazer this is how we this is how you're supposed to feel about her and although we're all buddies this is how we really feel and it's just though be aware though like when don't you guys feel that you're affected by like comments on things i look at comments on things to see how people are feeling and it and whether and even though i'm a strong person and i know that i shouldn't be persuaded by stuff like that it does it does make you look at things differently yeah it ruins my life like i it depends on the comment no i mean like

looking at when you watch an innocuous video and you read the comment oh doesn't that affect how you kind of view that video for sure for sure and i'll even watch something that i like and then read a comment and go maybe i'm a fucking idiot like it will and it does mess with me you're smart and savvy so if it's happening to you it is is. I saw a movie last night, and it made me realize how fucking dumb people are. Because I went alone to a movie. I'm not going to say what movie I saw. But the people's enjoyment of this movie made me go, we're done. There's no bar.

People are stupid. It's over. They were laughing at the most stupid shit ever. They were just enjoying things in a way and thinking this movie is great in a way that i go how when i'm not i don't want to talk about it but like i'm just dumb i'm just i'm so disappointed i'm disappointed in my fellow man and i it makes me either want to make movies and make tv to because i always look at things like veep or the wire or breaking bad and i go what's the point of me making tv i can never i can say with 100 assurity i don't even know if that's a word

i will never make something as good as veep comedically ever and I or 30 Rock it's just out of my league and yes that took it took a village to make those shows but um but man people just put out crap and then everyone just it I just how could you make something I I don't know I guess I that holds me back from making art because I'm like it can't be as good as that so I won't know. I guess that holds me back from making art because I'm like, it can't be as good as that, so I won't make anything. Whereas some people just go, I just wanted to, I don't know.

Yeah, I feel like sometimes if I made something, it wouldn't be that bad, but it also wouldn't be that good. Like that bad. Yeah. So I'd be in the middle, which I fucking,

I hate the middle. I'm so in the middle. I'm in the middle with everything. I'm like five, nine and a half. I'm just a little bit overweight. I'm in the middle which i fucking i hate the middle i'm so middle i'm in the middle with everything i'm like five nine and a half i'm just a little bit overweight i'm in the my hands are just above small like my cock just above small my breath is okay my teeth that's actually below average my hairline middle so middle i'm such a fucking middle. I am such a middle too, dude. And I want to be a fucking, I don't know. I want to be either 6'9 or 3'4.

I hate being a medium. I really do. You're not. I'm a medium. No, I am such a medium as well. And people go, no, Nikki, you've done all this stuff. It's because I just showed up more than you guys did. That's what I did.

That's not true. I am a medium as well. Anya, you weren't saying no when I was saying it. I know. I just wanted to listen to you. Anya spoke it up. Anya's mic wasn't working before. She was on mute.

No, I wasn't. I just, I mean, yes, it was. No, I was enjoying it, Andrew. I like it. No, I know. I'm busting chops. I relate. Yeah, I think something can be so bad, it becomes extremely popular.

And I don't know what that is. I don't know. There's a certain kind of bad that does very good. But people like watching Hallmark movies. People like crap. And I understand that because I just go, oh, those people are just stupid. Well, like SVU people. They can't.

They're not smart enough to enjoy something like veep but there are people that are smart that are smart enough to get veep that also enjoy like i watched i don't like to say because i work in the industry i don't like to say the things that i don't like but man it's just i'm watching re-watching will and grace right now i that show is so fucking funny and so well done. I'm rewatching. I watched the pilot of Frasier last night. I cried at that, not cried, but for me, when I say cried, I teared up at the end. A Frasier of the pilot?

Yeah, of the pilot. It is, I recommend it. It's on Hulu. Does his wife die or something? Well, this weekend I was at my friend Greg greg warren's comedy special in lexington kentucky and he had one of his friends there mark gross who is a showrunner for um sitcoms and or sorry head writer for a lot of sitcoms that you would know and love and he was talking to me about developing something he's like do you have any ideas you know what's and i'm like i don't

know and he goes i go i was thinking about multicam because multicam is i never wanted by the way single cam is like um i don't know why i'm giving this example dommer or veep you know that's single cam and then multicam is like friends fraser filmed in front of a live studio audience a big bang theory that's multicam and i never wanted to do multicam because they're just so cheesy and they're not real. You know, they don't feel as real as single cam. But then I realized that multicams are so much easier to shoot because it's a live studio audience. You can't keep them for seven hours.

So you get in, it's like doing a play. You have, and it's good for standups because it's interaction with the audience. So it's fun. And I'm like, oh, I would like, actually love to do a multicam. So I'm starting to think about ideas for that. But I talked to him and I said, yeah, I actually have some ideas.

And I think of that as a life that I would want to do is being on a multicam. And so I've been watching Will and Grace again, just naturally like kind of drawn to him. Friends, Seinfeld, everything. And he goes, watch. I was like, I got to write a pilot though. And he goes, watch the Frasier pilot. It's the perfect pilot. It's the perfect pilot. It's the,

and I, so I watched it last night and God damn it, is it ever. It made me, it's, you, I bet you anything,

you'll tear up. You should watch it and tell us tomorrow. I think you also, you can probably read the script too. That would probably help you. I feel like you're probably pretty good at it. with the captions.

Oh, that's a good point. Once I write one, I will pull up an example and like, you know, try to match it as, in terms of scene length and stuff like that. one I will pull up an example and like you know try to match it as in terms of scene length

and stuff like that but I think I have an idea for one and I think I really want to do one because do it it would be so fun

streamers want them now and you don't have to be squeaky clean anymore so you can be like do a dirty show I remember Louie did what was his show before Lucky Louie

Lucky Louie was was a multi-cam that was dirty and which I really enjoyed Jim Norton was so funny in that that was dirty, which I really enjoyed. Jim Norton was so funny in that. That one dude that always worked the cellar who had... Rick Shapiro, was he on it? Yeah.

Dude, that dude was... I just remember he was unbelievable. He has some monologues in it. But that's what I kind of can see from a show, maybe, that you would maybe want to do something... I'm going to watch that one again, too. Still dark humor, but like awesome multicam. And you're like,

Oh, even friends in Seinfeld. Like I could do. Yeah, you could. It's so fun. And like, just,

and I never really thought about the studio audience and feeding off that. And that is why I've been like, I don't want to do TV because TV is so boring. You just wait around all day in a trailer and then you shoot the scene. And by the time you actually get the scene, it's like the last take. And you're like, Oh God, are they they gonna even use that one it's just so then you need like a vision of like where's the scene gonna take place how oh we gotta

fucking lock down that whole boulevard or whatever and then yeah but if it's just like oh and they don't give you feedback like when you do a scene they don't go that was amazing because they just think you're an actor who already knows you're amazing because most actors already do think they're amazing. But I'm someone who constantly needs validation. So having a studio audience would be incredible. I didn't even think about that. Maybe you could just have silent clappers on set where it's like.

With golf, do you feel that way? Do you ever hit a shot and you're like, does anyone want to see that? I'm so, yes yes i'm the word i when i would surf with my step i'd catch a wave and then i'd ask everyone people that didn't even know me i'm like did you see that did you see me they're like you're such a fucking loser i remember i i had a hit in like in like middle school i laid this guy out so good and no one said anything but one father yeah one father was driving us home in football yeah and he goes hey man that was the one of the best hits i've ever seen i go

yeah so what was the hit like what did it look like to you and like i asked him like 45 quite and by the end of it he's like i can't i fucking hate this kid it's funny because you were aware at the time that that was obnoxious yet you couldn't help yourself because you wouldn't remember it unless you knew it was obnoxious. It just comes down to my dad not giving me enough credit. And then if I got credit from an older man, any old man, I'd be like. But yeah, I'm horrible at that, needing validation. I've gotten better.

I just do it because I like the progression of it rather than the, like, hey, great job. Way to go. Anya, do you seek that as a musician i mean you have to wait for a whole song until the the claps and you get claps no matter what oh yeah well you get claps if you're performing but not at home struggling with a song like i've been working on a song this weekend and i'm just like why do i do this it is agony it is just send it to me and i'll go, this is amazing. I will when it's done, but the process is like, it's so grueling.

It's like for the first two days, it's just like baby, baby, baby steps. Like I took a shitty idea. I thought that was hilarious. I thought that was the song. I was like Amy Grant kind of touched that already. No, it's coming along. It's going to be good.

But the shitty thing with songwriting is... I was asking you about that. It seems hard. What do you do? Do you hum first? Do you start with a chorus? I had an idea three months ago that I loved, that I played with,

and I was like, that's just so Baroque and weirdly classical. How can I make that into a song? And I just put it away, and then I have a songwriting... What does that mean? What was the idea that made you go, that so Baroque and weirdly classical. How can I make that into a song? And I just put it away. And then what does that mean? What do you mean? What was the idea that made you go? That's Baroque.

Like I couldn't think of anything that I would describe. It sounds very like, it sounds old timey. It sounds like, not like, Hey, like a lot of my songs have this like, it's a cabaret.

Okay. It's just like, it like sounds like that. It's like a melody like that yeah and um but it resolves in the lakes is that how so she has stuff like that that makes me yes yes but um then i had an idea and it's like kind of a rap like a hip hoppy not a rap but like in the sense that fiona apple sort of does rhythms like that. So I'm kind of doing a song like that, like my song Shut Up, which is sort of like talky singing.

And then I had the idea to put in like the Baroque thing fit right in. I was like, oh, that's great. That's great for the chorus. So kind of like leather tying those things together, like your surgeon. You could be a surgeon. With the leather and your vocal cords. And now it's like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it took three days, and I'm not done yet.

I don't know that I could be a songwriter because of that. It's just I've been trying to write songs too, and it's just I get bored after two minutes, and I feel accomplished at writing one thing or coming up with one. And then it takes too too long and comedy for me doesn't take long and i just don't know if i can do it yeah i mean when you're writing jokes you're not laboring over it right you're like no i just i'm putting it i just say something in conversation that kind of makes you laugh harder than usual and then i surreptitiously take out my phone and jot it down and then a month

later I'm about to go on stage and I'm like I want to do something new and then I'll look at my note and it'll say chopstick fiesta and I'll go oh and then I'll just walk on stage as I'm reading it I'm walking on stage and then I'll say something on stage and then it'll either work or won't and then over the course of seven sets it will become something or it won't but i will not look at it or think about it outside of those seven sets even once do you give up on any of them yeah oh yeah but they stay in my phone and then maybe a year later i'll bring back chopstick fiesta and try it a different way just yeah but it's not like intentional it's never like i literally just like scroll in my bring up my notes and just go and see where it lands and stop and go okay so i'll do something

from like months and or years ago sometimes that um it's just such a slow way of working it's so um lazy it's so lazy and songwriting is not like you do you feel like you are doing comedy in service to others like when someone comes up to you after a show and says oh my god that meant so much to me like that you like i finally feel like someone got me or i feel less shame about x y or z because you talked about it is that yes part of why i do that now i do that now. I do that now where I'm like, oh, this is something that people need to fucking know about this. This is important. But I think initially, no, you just do things that will people like me if I do this, right? Yeah.

I don't know. I did shows all weekend. I did any joke that I do that's like not about me seems to always really fail like especially the first time i tell it like if it's about a subject i just you ever write something you're like this is funny i know it's funny to do yeah like it's just like for someone that talks about subjects like i was talking about space and like i had this whole idea about space and i'm like in the middle of telling i go i don't care about my opinion on this like while i'm saying it out loud even though i think it's funny because then that's you yeah that's true i guess i know i didn't say that out loud maybe i should say i

don't care about well that was the whole i don't care about what i'm talking about yeah just so you guys know you know i'm like unless it's like a person yeah sorry i'm listening to you guys talk about like your creative process and how it varies between the three of you but like the the type of work that you put into it and then going back to what nikki was saying about going to the movie theater and wondering like why is the audience liking this when it's so terrible so i'm thinking and i'm wondering maybe instead of looking at like how the audience ingests it you look at like well what is tv and hollywood putting out right now

is it this like honest form of creativity or is it just like a formula that gets people acting like mechanical robots and reacting to it? Yeah, well, that is a trick. It's like they tell you when to laugh. So, you know, either with a laugh track in sitcoms or just the way you can say something. I can deliver a line and it if i do that you're gonna laugh a little bit louder because i'm going like and there's the punchline and so they can you

can learn a cadence i just it i guess our our styles kind of fit like who we are like anya is just much more like she will fold a towel and like set it down gently like she's a slower person so like you can do slower things that take time like you will i could see you like baking too and enjoying that process of like a slow process whereas i'm like why would anyone ever bake any it's so slow microwave all the ingredients in the box right i mean when i smoked weed i would i would always just smoke out of a pipe when people would roll joints i'm like that's like the oven of weed i'm gonna use the microwave what are you doing i know i didn't use an oven until i was like 32 years old yeah i'm not even kidding maybe maybe later right i mean i agree with you i i never used an oven i

just don't like i don't like taking a long time. And I think that's why I like comedy. It's just right away. It's funny. Like I know something funny right away because the only reason that ends up in my notebook is because it already got a laugh. Yeah. It wasn't. And I think that's the difference between you writing about space is being

like, I think I have an idea here. Like it didn't get a laugh initially. You were just, it was in your head being like, this could be funny as opposed to, Oh, I said this to Brenna and she laughed. And then I'm now I'm going to make something of it. So it are, initially you were just it was in your head being like this could be funny as opposed to oh i said this to brenna and she laughed and then i'm now i'm gonna make something of it so it are i already

know it's a win yeah i think the initial thing was funny i did say it out loud and then when i started to like expand on it and like write about it and like compare it to something else then it just became like an analogy kind of joke where you try to like become another comedian i don't know what i do that all the time where i'm like how would like sam murrell tell this joke or like i'm watching a lot of mark norman so i'm like oh well that would be like if i took a toothbrush and i stuck it up my ass and then it's like well that's not the way i talk yeah comedy but i also think that is the way you discover what works for you and not. Sorry about that. I was just saying everyone has influences,

and I swear every artist that thinks they're ripping someone off, they really aren't. Like often Matt, my partner, will be like, is this a total ripoff of whatever? Do you say partner because you're older and you don't want to say fiance or boyfriend? I'm gay. Because partner, I got to say, we got to quit partner unless you're older and you don't want to say fiance or boyfriend. I'm gay. Because partner, I gotta say we gotta quit partner unless you're gay.

No, I think that's dated, Nick. No, I don't. When I hear someone say if people don't know who you are and you say partner, I'm gonna assume gay. Babe, I was with you in 2010, but now

I have to say no because everybody is partnered. But why don't you say boyfriend? I don't know. I can if I want, but I feel too old to say boyfriend. And fiance sounds ridiculous. Okay, so that's what I'm saying. It's an old thing. It's about feeling like you feel ridiculous.

But I'm not trying to be, don't, I I'm a everyone knows how I feel about trans rights but I just my lover I love lover if you're trying to be funny like lover is like but partner

unless you're working at a law firm or you're gay like that's a way to tell people that you're or say boyfriend if you're gay

or girlfriend if you're gay but when you hear partner I think it just confuses people because then they go, oh, she's avoiding saying that she's gay, but she's gay. I know, but I think as the – I'm with you. Believe me, I don't even like partner.

I'm just kidding. I'm just saying other things that make me think you're gay. What, the blazer? It couldn't be the blazer. Sorry. I'm wrecking my boyfriend will often try to imitate or he'll be like i'm i got uh influenced by such and such band is this a total ripoff of let's say wise blood or something and i'm like i can't hear that influence at all because it's coming through your voice and your guitar.

So just go with it. So I think if you think you're imitating Mark Norman, I bet the results would be great and not a ripoff at all. And I do think it's a good thing to do and that you shouldn't avoid ripping off someone because as long as you're not actually stealing their joke, it will take you in a different direction. Like, you know, get you out of your the way that you do every single joke that you do. Not you, but like anyone. Yeah. All right. We got to go to break.

We'll come back with more with my partners, Anya and Andrew. Thanks, Logan. Appreciate it. 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities. I'm Joel. Oh, and I am Matt. And we're the hosts of How To Money. We want to be with you every step of the way

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founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. And we're back. Can we do a little bit of news, Anya? Or Noah? Sure. Anya? You guys both have little names

with ah at the end. So, you know. Andrew-ah? Nikki-ah. Okay, let's go through the news quickly. That's not good. You heard it here first. Nikki-ah? Okay, let's go through the news quickly. That's not good. Nikki, ah?

You said ah, you didn't say er. Alright, it's the news. Welcome to the news. I'm Andrew Collin and it's Tuesday, Monday. You know what that means. It's Monday. Hope you're having all this well. Back to you, nah, yeah, yeah. Okay, did you guys know that when you're stressed a dog

detects the chemical changes in your body through your breath and then the dog reflects your state of mind so dogs experience an emotional contagion and mirror or reflect their owner's state of mind.

It's so true. Sometimes if I'm seeking Luigi's attention and affection, I will mimic being distressed. Because whenever I'm crying or on the verge of tears, he always kind of like gets out of bed and looks at me. Like even if I'm just like, if I go like like he'll he'll sense it so sometimes to get his affection i will try to seem stressed and i'm stressed all the time so i'm sure he's like you know it's it's just it's hard to react to something that's constant so they're not the study found that they're not really reading your body language but when we're stressed there's some kind of chemical um that's excreted in our breath and the dogs smell that well that's what i'm saying i feel like he can smell it from across the room like my change because i i know that like dogs can

they did their i read about their smell this morning and reading this they have we have um six million whatever receptors on our nose and they have 300 million and they can smell a droplet of a substance in 20 olympic-sized swimming pools one droplet whereas we could not you know so and they also their noses when we smell something air also comes in at the same time we smell but they block off in their nose air and smell come from different places so they're sucking in air in one hole and then it blocks it off and they get aroma in another and when we breathe out it's pushing all the air and the smell out whereas when they breathe out it's circulating more back in so they i mean it's insane we don't even understand it's so weird that there's

certain senses on certain animals are so much better than humans yet yeah we dominate them yeah we dominate them and they can't like write a speech you know what i mean like i like brains are made of peanuts yeah yeah they're just so dumb down but their noses are on on unbelievable they're better than any human twitching around they're like your tongue can you imagine your Yeah, yeah. They're just so dumb dumb. But their noses are unbelievable. They're better than any human. You see their noses twitching around? They're like your tongue. Can you imagine your morning breath to a dog?

A dog has to be like, I fucking hate you. Well, it said dogs hate. No, they love stink. They hate scents. Do you remember Nikki's air treat jokes? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that was in that same set, I think, where I said that when you fart it's like giving your dog an air treat oh so he likes the other yes i don't think i ever said it because it

grossed people out so much but yeah maybe that was so a dog likes the smell of shit because they go into shit a lot well yeah it masks their own scent so it's good for their survival they don't want to be smelled by other predators but my dog willa she sometimes when i'll start crying i'm like really ramping it up for her because i've i just i know she likes licking the tears off my face and yesterday i just let her go to town and lick my entire face because i was sobbing did you go like wash your face immediately were you like immediately yeah immediately and also i think she gets jealous and can they say Did you go wash her face immediately? Immediately. Were you grossed out? Yeah. Immediately. And also, I think she gets jealous. They say that dogs can smell your pheromones.

Because the second Matt will hug me or kiss me in the kitchen, she just shoves her nose right into my pussy. Or my butthole. It's so weird. Depending on the time of'm getting i'm getting double double troubled there oh my god my anus opens yeah it is weird when you have when you copulate in front of your dog you're gonna know when to break up with matt when she doesn't run up to your vagina because you're gonna know that you don't feel the same way yeah he's gonna be like

it's like a bomb sniffing dog Willa going down on you right now? Do you not love me anymore? Do I not turn you on anymore? Willa, smell the pussy. Yeah, apparently dogs hate our, like they really resent us for deodorant and perfumes and just different sprays. Yeah.

So you're really, I mean, this weekend on the girls chat, I was horrified by a thread of things that got revealed about dogs. Can you just? Oh no.

No. No? No. No. Well, I'll say that one of my friends, her dog ate her poop this weekend because she had to poop in her yard

because she was locked out of a house and then her dog ate her shit and i have to say that if my dog ate my i have no problem with pooping in the yard all that checks out she had no other option she was in like colorado in the fucking boonies and she was locked out of her parents house that had this like coat on it so she had to poop in the yard the dogs ate the the poop. I would say, though, that I would have to. I would probably not interact with Luigi for a month after that. If I knew he gobbled my shit. Because you were too turned on?

Yeah, I couldn't look in my eyes of how fucking horny I would be and jealous. Talk about eating ass. Wait, what? Everyone was lighthearted about it and being like, oh, that's so funny. And I was seriously like, you need to put that dog down. It probably will die. All dogs would do that. I mean, depending on your diet.

All dogs would do that. I don't care if they do it or not. Of course they would do it. But I don't, I would not keep that dog in my house afterwards. I don't know what I would make him. You're not going to be shitting regularly in your house. What? I just don't want his shit mouth that like.

Yeah, but you just brush their teeth. With what? If you're shitting in your front yard, you don't have a dog to brush on your hand. Yeah, but you'll still make out with your boyfriend if he eats your butt. I wouldn't. No, I wouldn't. My boyfriend does not do that. I'm just, okay.

Well, I'm just saying. I absolutely would not. Absolutely would not. So you would. i have a line but everyone in the chat was just like that's hilarious oh yeah but you're so like anti-shaming what is this like i thought you were not into people shaming themselves so i let my dog eat my poop when i was eight that's's different. That's different because you were eight. But I don't understand being an adult woman that her dog ate her shit and then I wonder if she even let her dog

back in the car with her. No, she was horrified. She was like, I'm disgusted with this dog. I was horrified. She tried to get rid of it and then I think he went for more. She was like,

what are you doing? She was in dire stra straits and she goes what did he eat oh yeah she was a protein bar popcorn popcorn what what was in there probably she probably ate dog food wait do you think then what if she really tested my boundaries of like i i when my dog eats like my dogs first of all i've never seen my dog eat shit i they sniff it but i've never seen my and i know that's a normal thing for dogs to do i don't think my dogs are better than your dogs but my dogs don't eat shit i've never had a dog that eats shit i've never seen it happen i do know that they smell other dog shit and i do not allow them to because i heard that their nose can suck up worms and that's how well if it was yours they would in a second they love you um they would smell it and maybe try to lick it or something but i've never

seen them try to eat shit i have to say like and sometimes i've been on my phone and haven't been paying attention and they're sniffing a place for a while they don't go to eat the shit all i know is when it happened to me i was shocked too yeah i wonder if it tastes like caviar to them like it's like human shit like it must be delicious to them i have no there's no judgment on them doing it i'm just saying i would have a hard time letting that dog back in my home. Yeah, absolutely. I really would. All right, next story. It'd be several days. Okay.

Several. Taylor Swift says her new song, Antihero, confronts the things I hate about myself. In the latest Midnight's Mayhem With Me post, Swift said that she struggles a lot with the idea that life has become unmanaged unmanageably sized and says that she struggles with the idea of not feeling like a person i know i i would i would feel that it's nice to hear that she struggles like we all do

and she even said in this thing so she's been doing this thing ahead of her release of Midnight's which is coming October 21st I believe that she's been doing this thing every couple days where she um spins this like um little cage of all these little ping pong balls and they each have a track number on it and then she reveals the name of the track the name of the song and to swifties this is a huge deal just to know the name of a song because we just get excited about this dumb shit and then last night for the first time she did track three and it was called anti-hero and then she put on a reel on instagram that was this uh interview she did about the song anti-hero and it's about all of her insecurities and how yeah what what you know noah just said it was hard to hear her say what i hate about myself because i was just like

really i mean i can't wait for the song to find out but um i'm i'm surprised i'm glad she's putting it out there because i think everyone no matter how perfect they are does hate things about themselves and also i feel like once you get to a certain level, you're not supposed to say you hate anything about yourself, even if you do, because you're setting an example for young women not to hate themselves. And I have always said, fuck that. So I'm glad to hear that.

But I also, I like how kind of just, she's usually so poised and every word that she picks is already pre-written. Like we've heard her do the NYU speech. We've heard her give like kind of acceptance speeches for different awards recently. And it's all been very scripted. So it was nice to see this little interview with her where she was kind of just like shooting from the hip.

You could tell she was kind of just like, I don't know. It's just, I really liked the song and because it's very honest. And I'm like, oh my God, if you're saying this song is honest, what are we going to get? I'm so excited about this album. It's all songs that she wrote in the middle of the night when she couldn't sleep. Anya, have you ever written a song in the middle of the night when you can't sleep, like woken up and then like, I have to get the song out? Oh, I wish I've had song ideas come to me in dreams and I'll record them into a voice memo. It's been a while since I've done that, like a year and a half. But no, I've never written a song fully in my sleep.

I have written one song called Go to Bed out of an insomnia moment, but not actually in the middle of the night. But that's exciting. Do you think her saying that she's human like the rest of us and struggling is also premeditated? because she's such a savvy businesswoman. Or do you buy it? Everything she does, she knows what she's doing. But this felt very casual to me.

The way she was talking felt like she was doing almost like a podcast. Like she didn't really know where the sentence was going to go. And she was choosing great words because she's just amazing and smart. But I really like that she said um what was the part that was my favorite oh i was just gonna say it she said um my life has become um yeah unmanageably sized instead of being like bragging being like it's so big oh at one point she goes and by the way don't feel sorry for me please it's not like when i went like don't please no pity.

Like, she didn't want anyone. She needed to say that, too, because she's like, to hear someone complain about, like, I hate my life when you're Taylor Swift, it's hard to hear this, like, billionaire. And she'll get shit for even saying that, like, of being like, oh, like, giving, like, a disclosure before, like, I know know this is gonna you know what i mean but at least that's better if you watch it it's so masterfully done you can't be mad at her she's just adorable she's sweet um i cannot wait for this album i am resentful of how much she puts out and how constantly she is working and writing and i'm just so i I just can't believe I know I wonder does she have time for a

relationship I think so she seems happy I think she I would love to see a day in her life like how she manages a day off I mean that's the stuff that's why I want to be friends with her I just want to see how she manages her life um yeah and she bakes a lot i know and likes cooking and stuff and she's just like likes decorating and she's god but she's not doing a million podcasts she's not doing there's a lot of things she's not doing where she probably has a decent amount of time for i went through three weeks without doing any podcasts or doing anything and i did not write nary a song or a joke or anything i mean it was just like with a free time i do not like free time and i will stand by that

the rest of my life i just got three weeks of it and i did not like it i do you seem to do so much reading and you seem to be doing a lot of stuff like you you're you've ingested everything oh and you wanted to be off your device no i mean like i never like sit in a chair with an overhead light over my book it's it's me in bed bundled and 62 degree like my air conditioning blasting me bundled other covers in the dark at three o'clock in the afternoon when it is beautiful like 77 degrees gorgeous day the nicest day of the year and i'm in my room in the dark with the blackout curtains drawn reading a book about you know the aids crisis because relatively comfortable except for the content yeah well i don't know or like i'm on reddit which you know might seem, but I'm usually reading about

interesting things that I care about. So I don't know because anything that feels good or feels like the act of someone who's depressed feels guilty. You know, like if you're not enjoying the weather, you are a bad person. This is the nicest week of the year. Yeah. And you're inside? What the fuck's wrong with you?

Don't you understand it's 73 and sunny? What do you do when you have nothing to do? I know you golf, but what do you do if there's no golfing and you just have the afternoon and there's no podcast to do, there's no cleaning to be done, there's no cooking to be done, there's no meal prep? What the fuck do you guys do? I mean, I had a lot of time off. I feel like there's always something. be done there's no meal prep what the fuck do you guys do i mean i had a lot of time always something yeah like what what what do you do andrew uh i did buy a book i bought a book i started reading it it's the life of uh leonardo da vinci what made you do that

i went to a bookstore and i felt like i don't know i missed the feeling of a book in my hand but why did you choose that book um because i read this guy uh i forget the fucking name of the author but he wrote uh the steve jobs biography oh yeah walter isaacson walter isaacson yeah and i really enjoyed that and i really like leonardo vinci for the first 70 pages and then it starts getting into the technical things of how he paints and then and then you start having to reread every paragraph give me a simple story like he went to the farm and then he moved to the big city and the big city was scary for leonardo but he started drawing with pen yeah and then and that's good for me and i'm like i know

the story of leonardo vinci i don't need to know, like, you could tell it's Leonardo by the landscape of the cloud and how the sad face of the- Man, I have tried to read John Steinbeck's East of Eden so many fucking times because on the subreddit books, it's always listed as the number one best book of all time. What? Really? Like, people love East of Eden. What's wrong with it?

What's so hard? I have to hear about the fucking geography of the, you know, Northern California Valley and the scapes and the mountains

and the grasslands and the wetlands and the deltas and the, it goes on so long. I cannot get past the first three pages because I'm so,

I don't want to hear about clouds stop describing clouds yes I don't need the pictures your voice your voice

I can't stand a description of the topography in a fucking book I don't want to hear about what the shingles on the roof look like

I don't want to hear about what the the sconces or the the um a gate like if you're describing a scene just tell me the type of house tell me the type of neighborhood and get on with the fucking story by the way make your book three fucking chapters i don't need 15 chapters in the first four pages and you got me hooked if it oh that's in chapter seven so many publishers

they're like we need 80 000 words or we're not paying you. Fuck. I am tired of people recommending books that make them seem smart. Stop it. Just tell me what you actually like to read, which is something that actually was written recently and does not describe a bucolic field or like seascape. I'm so tired. Every book reads like the old man in the sea and i know that's a great book but i'll never get through it that's actually an easy book to read

i don't want to read that one that one's actually easy though that one's like 80 pages final thought you could do that one he catches the fish um let's do a quick top one, bottom one. This category today is old technology. Old technology. Top one, bottom one. Let's start with bottom. Worst old technology, Andrew. I thought we were going to start. Okay.

Anya, you go first. Sorry. Old technology. Speak and spell? Yes, that was a boring thing. But it was kind of like the, you don't like it? I don't know. I couldn't think of one.

It was cool for the time, but they could have done better. Couldn't they have? I mean, it was just a little boring and it took forever, but it was radical. I liked the handle on it, though, that you could walk around with it. I don't even know what that is. Yeah, you type in things and then it would talk. It was pretty much like my robot voice. Oh.

Yeah. I don't remember that. Noah, your least favorite. The Palm Pilot. You guys remember that? Oh. Yeah. Fuck the Palm Pilot.

Yeah. I never had one. Sideways. Did that open sideways? No, that one was cool, though. The side kick? It has a pen. Then we was cool though it has like a pen that would go

the palm pilot had a pen it was for like people that thought they were doing business it was so expensive everyone do their best um sound of

someone typing on a palm pilot on a palm pilot yeah with your mouth that's good okay that was not great that sounded like a typewriter no no it was just funny here's one that's good okay that was not great that sounded like a typewriter no no here's one sounds like a mouse eating a little mouse's vagina a mouse who's in love smelling another mouse okay sounding like that dog eating yeah palm pilots i never used them but um they they were recently like became extinct, I think,

just recently. It was like the last Palm Pilot or not Palm Pilot. Did you ever have Blackberry? Blackberry is the one that I was thinking. Is Blackberry done? Wow. My uncle Dennis- Blackberry is a little clickier.

Maybe that's what I was doing the impression of. That makes sense now. My least favorite old technology because I Googled old technology just to see a list and this is what i learned about just now and it is by far the worst it's called the bathing machine the bathing machine was a device popular from the 18th century until the early 20th century it would allow people to change into their swimwear while on the beach so women would go in they would take off their petticoats

and their dresses and everything and then they would change into their swimwear which was essentially like a onesie a giant onesie uh still very covered up and then because it was so embarrassing to like walk into the water the the thing would then this big you know outhouse type thing would be rolled into the sea and then you would get out of it in the sea and then it would come back onto the the um what's that just all because about um to hide women's bodies yeah and men were allowed to swim nude and women had to get in this fucking bathing machine they needed like a submarine essentially yes i mean how much would something like that cost back then you'd'd pay, that seems extremely expensive.

Well, it was like every beach had one. You know what I mean? Beaches were very crowded back in the day, especially in the Northeast and stuff. Yeah. There were thousands of people on the beach. Because it was hot, no AC, and there was nothing to do. Yeah.

There was no TikTok. I love that. I love when you, one time when I was at daniel boone's home like touring it with my parents on some kind of road trip the woman was like well daniel boone didn't have nintendo now did he he didn't have tv so she went through every technology he didn't have to really like drive it home we were like okay we get it well again i did a i did a report on daniel but that's so weird. Daniel Boone. Remember, you'd pretend to be...

Did you ever have to do something where you had to be frozen all day as that character? No. That's so weird. Can you imagine? What did he do? Frozen? Maybe with cosplay that my pedophile uncle made me do.

Andrew's just like this, frozen and dying. Yeah, no, I did. I had to wear one of those raccoon hats or whatever. Oh, that's cool. And I was Daniel Boone for a day. You should do day you should do comedy but you were frozen didn't he fight in texas yeah you just have to stand there he was a frontiersman i believe i don't really remember i know he didn't play nintendo my bottom one i know it's at the time it was great but it wasn't that the tape player i guess at the time was great but now like. Like VCR? No, like tapes.

Yeah. I just remember. They're so cute now. How like, because I didn't take care of my things. I wouldn't put in the tape. The shit would always come out, and I'd have to rewind it in with a pencil, and I never did it well, and then the music wouldn't sound good, and then you'd have to go through 15 songs to find one song because it didn't tell you. It was hard to figure out where you were in a tape yeah but you know what i do

like about a tape player i do like i miss the sound of plastic closing like that yes like that just that just machines working or like even i'm a multiple disc player like like an old CD player that would do like five. It'd be like, What is this, Eminem? It was so good. Yeah, I know. It was so crunchy and satisfying. Oh, it's so crunchy. Remember when you go in our, remember,

when we go into the old theaters and they have those like, I mean, that's before our time, but like, you had to be really strong to like work in electronics and everything like was like, those, like, I mean, that's before our time. But, like, you had to be really strong to, like, work in electronics. And everything, like, was, like. Well, theater. What do you mean?

Like, the big metal, like, bars. The projector. Fuck with the lights and everything. Oh, no. You ever seen that in the back of the theaters? No. Like, the old school. I think it's just some pimpled teenager pressing play.

That's what it was. Are you talking about, like, for theatrical productions or for films? Theatrical productions. Oh, yeah. He's talking about lights and the whole... It's all clanking. Just freaking out. I do sounds.

Yeah, I do too. Everything's quiet now. Everything's silent. I do like keyboard sounds though. Satisfying. Can you try? Oh, yeah. Top one. Top one. everything's silent I do like keyboard sounds though mmm satisfying alright oh yeah top one top one I want to switch my answers now

I think speak and spell was the top thing ever and my worst thing is disposable cameras but I can't decide if I'm not still oh I liked those oh I love the whine

the sound of the whine and the sound of the oh yeah when you would turn on the flash it'd go like oh where you'd hold it down it would be like a high pierce sound that your dog gonna hear you're so good at these things i forgot about that and the click when you hit the thing it's like that's the picture and then you would only you would see it like the number when you didn't

yes when you had like four left but that last sometimes you would be like do i have one left and then you would know when it wouldn't stop winding and then you bring it to fucking like walgreens and then a week later you had your memories in a fucking envelope and it was about three good pictures and the rest were just nightmares just like look like you were taking pictures of space it's the was yeah every photo but inside your us trying to take a photo of the moon now with our phones oh my god yes um yeah i got nostalgic for it because i saw a picture of kate moss and pete doherty or dockardy or however you say his name from the libertines and they were walking around like 15 years ago and she's clutching a packet of cigarettes and a digital camera, or a disposable camera. So 90s.

It was probably 25 years ago. Yeah, now there's people that like- Yeah, that's right. Yeah, not 15. I know, everything, you have to update all of, like I recently realized I had to update my 10 years ago. I need to just go, it's probably 15. And now my 15 is now 20.

About every so often, got to make that update you know what makes me so angry is when people go do you know that 1945 was closer to 1980 than we are now and i'm like fuck you dude i don't god that makes me because it does blow your mind tomorrow i know i know i know that really bothers me too i i thought you were gonna say like who cares but the thing is, it's really significant. Wait, 1945 is closer to 19... No, no, that was just an example. No, they do like...

19, like, Woodstock was closer to 19... Like, there's things like 1969 was closer to... To 1980 than today would be to 19... So, whatever, yeah, obviously. Whatever 1980 than today would be. To 1980. So whatever. Yeah, obviously. Whatever. Whatever. 1980 minus 40 years.

Like that's. The point is in the 90s, you would look at the 60s like, whoa, way back then. But now the 90s are what the 60s were to that time. To us. And it's like, oh my God. The 60s and the 90s was like a century ago. And now the 90s to us seem like it was yesterday. Or if you're learning about World War II in the 90s,

that would be about like kids learning about the first Iraqi war now. Yes. Like that's how, that's fucking weird. Anyways. All right. My number one thing is the high school or middle school or, you know, whatever school projector screen. you hated that i loved it yeah it's nice they'd roll that out the lights would come down i would get asmr i would almost

fall asleep every single time i would be having to fight sleeping the entire time but then the pens would come out and sometimes the pens would be terrible but when there's a fresh batch of pens and the way they would write on that thing and the way that you could watch your teacher's handwriting which was very exciting there is just something so soothing about that i miss it so much fresh batch of pens and the way they would write on that thing and the way that you could watch your teacher's handwriting, which was very exciting. There is just something so soothing about that. I miss it so much. And yeah,

that was my probably favorite technology. A lot of times when that came out, that's probably going to be a substitute teacher and you know, you don't have to fucking listen or really do anything. Yeah. Cause they can't call on you in the dark. It's like you're protected in the dark. No one's going to bully you in the dark.

Like it's, it's you in your room when it's 70 degrees yes i like when it would get dark in a room and then the projector and then the sound of the pens it was all very asmr compared to chalk too i mean i love chalk though i like i was a lefty i'd get chalk on my hand you know i just like you were a gymnast yeah like a little it's like a little gymnast my top one would be um i i think home phone when we just had home phones because then you could get away you could just say hey i wasn't home like sorry couldn't like there was the easiest excuse ever to get out of anything but if you you, I was thinking about that. You wouldn't give up how convenient it is to get in touch with someone now for the ability to not, to dodge someone. And there was answering machines.

I was also thinking, I go, did more stalkers drive by your house to check to see if you were home? Yes. But then they can find you now pretty easy too because everything's so connected. Yeah. So what's scarier? home yes but then they can find you now pretty easy too because everything's so connected yeah so what's scarier the fact that they could get to you now because your location's everywhere or back then when they could just drive by your house you know what i mean or when they had to drive by yeah where they had to drive now they can just tap into your ring camera um noah real quick what's your fave my favorite is actually uh andrew's bottom which is the tape

recorder the like especially when it became portable because my friend and i we would take that thing everywhere and we would record these like documentaries and then every year we would go back and listen to them and like hear how tiny our voices sounded and just remember conspiracies from school or we would pretend to do talk shows on them and stuff so that's so you're podcasting wow yeah you were podcasting yeah early broadcaster oh my god do you have those you gotta play them i mean i have them but i don't have a tape player i can't find a tape player anywhere um the my favorite toy as a kid it reminded me of that was the yak back and you could talk into it and then it would do it backwards and you could learn how to say things backwards and then you would say it backwards and then play backwards and it

would sound i still know how to say my name backwards reslag eekin reslag eekin reslag eekin that person become a millionaire you think? Yakback? No because they're not still around What a weird invention I'm sure there's some kind of app that does the same thing But they were so fun I never heard of the Yakback

This is Reslag Egan signing off Can you do our names? No because you would have to It's not just like reading them backwards, you know. It's like the sound. Any around you. Nilak. Wait, is that yours?

I just made it up. Sounds like an episode of Twix. I mean, I've had it in peaks. That sounds pretty close. Nilak. I think there's someone that can actually. I'm reading them up. Nilak were.

Because Colin, if you're taking Colin. How's that cling on? It would be. Nilak. That's how you say it backwards if you're taking Colin How's that Klingon It would be Nillock That's how you say it backwards If you're reading it backwards Oh But the sound

Is a lot different Than what you would be reading Cause Reslag Is not It was something It sounds like an alien talking It's so weird Alright we gotta go

Thank you guys for listening to the show We'll be back tomorrow With more show We're back baby We're back Thank you so much Anya For being here Don't be. And Jack Sparrow. You're doing Jack backwards. Jack back.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon,

listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups,

this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season but you know i don't want any of you guys to miss all the

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Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. Tune in and join the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.