The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #301 I Approve Of Myself

Episode Date: December 8, 2022

Nikki is at a point in her life where a celebration is in order for the rare occasions she gets horned up... like certain scenes from The White Lotus or characters that are jerks. After repeating a mantra from a  Louise Hay meditation, Nikki was ready to present at the People's Choice Awards. She talks about attending the event with Esther Povitsky and having the best time. Also, find out which starlette came to the rescue at the after party during a toxic experience. Nikki also dishes on how she got cast on The Backstreet Boys Holiday Special and how FBoy Island just got cancelled...but that doesn't mean cancelled cancelled. In the Fanthrax segment, Besties talk about finding out Nikki is on the Masked Singer, how the podcast permeates their lives and look for advice about looking at partner's phone and finding nudes.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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You are cordially invited to the hottest party in professional sports. I'm Tisha Allen, former golf professional and the host of Welcome to the Party, your newest obsession about the wonderful world that is women's golf. Featuring interviews with top players on tour, tips to help improve your swing,

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or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love. That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. With a blend of humor, vulnerability, and authenticity, we share our personal journeys navigating our 30s, tackling

the complexities of modern relationships, and engage in thought-provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. From groundbreaking interviews with diverse guests to relatable stories that will resonate with your experiences, Decisions Decisions is going to be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get We'll see you next time. Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Emi Olea, host of the podcast Crumbs. For years, I had to rely on other people to tell me my story. And what I heard wasn't good. You really f***ed last night. It felt like I lived most of my life in a blackout.

I was trapped in addiction. You had to grab the lamp and smash it against the walls. And then I decided I wanted to tell my own story. Listen to Crumbs on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The Nikki Glaser Podcast. The Nikki Glaser Podcast. Here's Nikki. Hello, here I am. Welcome to the show. This is the Nikki Glaser Podcast. How the hell are ya? I am here in St. Louis, Missouri. Noah is in Arizona.

I'm sitting on the opposite side of the room that I normally do, and I just spilled Zevia all over me because I'm not used to navigating this mic stand thing. I got all wet and it feels good for once in my 38 year old life to get wet because it doesn't happen as much anymore. Do you feel, do you feel the dryness happening? I definitely am way, way less hornier than I was in my twenties. That's it. That's it. That's like, I feel crazy because of it because it just feels, it's too soon for that to start.

I want to be, I don't know. I still get, you know what I got horned up by? Like certain things I sometimes feel like a man because I rarely am just like so turned on by something that it inspires me to do something but once in a while it gets me okay have you been watching White Lotus I have not been but I hear it's very sexy oh my god okay you're gonna love it so much I'm excited for you to see it it's just beautifully shot it's written by this guy who just like he just gets

women I don't know it just feels feminist and it's creepy but it's beautiful and this guy who just like he just gets women i don't know it just feels feminist and it's creepy but it's beautiful and all the actors are so good except for a couple i won't name names but just like i didn't name names for the dommer thing but some people guessed who i thought was the worst actor ever because it was so glaringly bad um no pretty much everyone's a good actor on white lotus and who am i to to say because i would probably be the weakest link on there but i want to get on season three i think i'm just well known enough but not known enough to get on there anyway there's a guy on there horned up though yeah theo james you want to give him a little goog he's i feel bad like i can't it's it's it's it's a lot like

the thing like the show alone when i said i was watching that with chris and i was so attracted to that guy clay that i had to tell chris because i just felt like it was the elephant in my pants like it was just every time he came on screen i would be like oh god he's so hot and i just felt like i was almost like not cheating but like I had to share it with him like there's something emotional that happens when you're like have a crush on someone on TV that feels like I just want to share it with my partner

that's so much of TV watching is to be like oh my god he's so hot even if it was like I try to because if you watch White Lotus most people do Noah you're you're out of the loop. But there's a girl on there too that's a prostituto. That's not the Italian for it, but she's a prostitute or sex worker.

And Lucia. And she is so hot. And much like Theo James, whenever she comes on screen I'm like oh my god but Theo James there's something about a extremely hot douchebag character that like really gets me and I was trying to like look at pictures of him I was first of all he has no Instagram so there's no way to see like I just wanted to get like footage of him to like I was eventually gonna end up watching like hardcore porn but like I wanted to like like footage of him to like, I was eventually going to end up watching like hardcore porn, but like I wanted to like maybe grease the wheels because I've just been,

he's just the hottest thing I've seen in a really long time. Besides my fucking boyfriend. But you know, the thing that I saw that I don't have with me and that, you know, adds a little bit of like, oh, just more desire to it.

And he, he has no presence online and he's kind of like an unknown and he um yeah he that he's that he has no instagram is so mysterious so funny his instagram people must think it's him because it's got like 200 and something thousand followers but it's made by a fan and i know most people that follow him think it's him but it's not official it's not it doesn't have a blue check mark it's called theo james official but all of the captions it's definitely by a fan because the captions are like um it says like my dears in three days it's just a picture

of him like wistfully sitting by a thing he would never oh another one is life is not the days that have passed but those that are remembered it seems like he's writing these captions so hundreds of thousands of people think this guy is worse than his character and his character is scummy i don't know what it is the other guy that did this to me the only one in the past on a tv show is and i'm watching it again i'm re-watching veep is dan's character on veep and it's another character that is just a rapscallion is never to be trusted will never love one woman will always cheat and i don't really want these people to like love me but it was funny i was sharing with my friends on the chat that theo james i was like oh my god the guy in white lotus is so fucking hot

and all of them were like, he's too hot. I couldn't be with someone that hot. And I'm like, what do you mean? And they're like, I need him to have like discolored teeth or some like a crooked, like a scar or, you know, big ears. Something needs to offset him so that I know other women won't, like that everyone doesn't want him. It would drive me crazy to think everyone wanted him.

Whereas I was like, it would drive me fucking crazy. It would be like so hot to think everyone wanted him. And I'm like, I got him. That would drive me crazy to think everyone wanted him whereas i was like it would drive me fucking crazy it would be like so hot to think everyone wanted him and i'm like i got him that would make me feel amazing what do you think looks like chris yes he's like i say to him all the time and chris is just kind of like uh-huh you're just saying that so you can get away with saying he's hot but i'm like no he does look like you um it's like dark features can i tell you um a picture that made me super horned up lately yes please you posted a photo of you and esther pavitsky at the people choice award and you you're holding her hand and she looks like oh my god it's like dom and slave. It was so hot. I know. It's so,

I was, we, that was so fun. So I went to the People's Choice Awards last night. It came up out of fucking nowhere over the weekend. Things always come up last minute for me. So grateful that someone thought to plug me into this show because it was so much fun. But I presented for best late night host,

which is a really cool award to present and i love going to these award shows because you see crazy big celebrities you get to like walk amongst them um red carpets are always fun um you get to see cool performances which i didn't get to see shania twain performed and i love her i watched her documentary and i'm just so obsessed with her journey and like just how powerful she is and just she writes all her own songs and her voice is just cool and she works so fucking hard

to get where she is. That Shania Dock is pretty, you could tell she had a heavy hand in it. It doesn't really delve into her divorce which is super interesting because he cheated on her

with her best friend and then she ended up marrying the guy who used to be married to her best friend because they both got cheated on her with her best friend. And then she ended up marrying the guy who used to be married to her best friend because they both got cheated on and started hanging out like, God, our partners are together. And then they ended up together.

So good. But they barely touched on that. And she also had Lyme disease and it fucked up her voice, all of her vocal cords. Lyme disease fucks with you neurologically and so much of singing is neurological. It's just your brain doing stuff that you can't really even you don't even know how or why it's happening so anyway um she sounded great last night she performed but my pres I was

presenting like 40 minutes after she performed so they pulled me backstage I was seated in the audience at first and I missed I was like backstage in this little holding tent where Heidi Klum was there and um trying to think of who else Lil Rel some housewives um but it was so I got asked to do this and then I was like Chris was flying back from LA he was there for a couple days after I moved out so I moved out of LA came back here I was supposed to have some time off that's crazy and then I got I know and then it's one of those things where they ask and you kind of go i wish this would have not been i wish they didn't think of me because now i have to do it i have to do this because it's such a cool opportunity you can't say no but i do want the time off you know it's like when your friend has a party or something you just want the night off

but you're like well it's i gotta go to this party like you just chance to have this experience yeah do you relate to that of like i gotta go because it's gonna be just you got one chance to have this experience yeah do you relate to that of like I gotta go because it's gonna be a good experience but god I don't want to and I just wanna fucking sleep

all the time and I didn't wanna go back to LA and travel and I just I've been feeling like uncomfortable in my own body a little bit and I just didn't wanna go

to a fitting cause everything's always so tight and I have a question my stylists are so nice whenever it's tight they're just like

yeah this is a weird designer they make things like yeah this is a weird designer they make things like super like the sizes are all different and like honestly this is a dumb garment like they'd shame the garment it's so nice they're always like ew we don't even like this it would never have worked I hate this color they always it clearly is like I'm not the size I used to be and they were taking a gamble but then they always make it the dress's fault and I love them for it. What was your question? Did you,

okay. Your outfit, let's talk about it. It was a lavender dress. Was that a tribute to Taylor Swift? No, I didn't even think to put lavender haze as my caption for the pictures until my second post,

because a bestie, I think a bestie wrote me like, this is your lavender haze moment. And I go, there I was searching through bejeweled lyrics to try to find something that resonated with the look. And then Lavender Hayes is staring at me the whole time. It was the first dress I tried on. Well, it was the second.

There was a couple things that didn't fit. A bustier thing. But it was the second thing I tried on. I was drawn to it. It reminded me of something porsche would wear on white lotus if you're watching it yeah it was like this it's balme and i've never worn balme i think you're supposed to say it like a bum and ball men um and it was like tweed and yeah it was totally a taylor swift moment i didn't even think about

that it felt like it felt young in it you know it felt like a Taylor Swift moment. I didn't even think about that. It felt like, it felt young in it, you know? It felt like a young look. And there were some other looks that I was dying for. I mean, we usually go through about 10 to 20 looks in a fitting. And then we always know like kind of which one's the one. Like it's just so easy to choose. But this time it was ironic because I went into the fitting being like, guys, I really don't like my body right now.

I'm just being honest with you. Don't try to tell me that I'm the same. I know I'm not. I'm not used to feeling this way. I'm about to start my period today, tomorrow. And so I felt like nothing was going to feel right. And then there were four things that I was like, I could wear any of these. But you also kind of don't know how other people are going to be dressed.

You don't want to be overdressed. I also wasn't nominated for an award. I'm presenting one. So I don't want to get too sparkly. Like, this is my night. So I settled on a fun dress and was just totally glammed out. So my fitting was at 12 in the afternoon. I went and got my nails done at 11 that was worthless because i put on this sparkly number and i couldn't get it off

so i had to like claw at it and then all my nails got just like you know when they're like 85 dry and they just those gummy streaks you get in them and you're just like that was just a waste of my fucking hour and a half and you just wait in that salon and there was this woman talking on her fucking speakerphone so loud it was so annoying um but anyway uh so my day started at like 10 45 i stayed in bed till then i was i've been listening to these um mantra meditations by louise hay and they're all over YouTube. She's dead now. But she does these meditations where she has you do positive reinforcement. I think I've talked on the show before about her. What she says is that if you aren't grateful for the things that the world

is giving you, why would the world ever keep giving you gifts? If you every year gave a gift to someone and they said, I don't like it, it's not good enough. Would you keep giving that person gifts? So you must be grateful for what you have. And so she also believes in subliminal messaging. So I've been playing these as I go to sleep because I've just been having some like self-esteem issues rearing up lately. And this one has really helped me and it's i approve of myself and i just say i approve of myself all day long i approve it just in my head i approve of myself i approve of myself and if you say it 800 to 1300 times a day just like in your head i approve myself i prove myself prove myself prove myself just whispering it to yourself or

not even say but just like saying it in your head it starts to fucking work and it doesn't even have to mean anything to you like i i said so many times the other day it started just to sound like a prumus like an aprunamus cell an aprunamus cell like it didn't sound like anything and i'm like how is my brain even gonna know that that means i approve of myself but um it has worked for me and i don't know why I didn't come up with this earlier because I cured my back injury on Dancing with the Stars by saying I'm strong I'm prepared this is easy so why wouldn't I just say I approve of myself and it's just a perfect thing to do because it's not like I am beautiful you can do anything like things that I'm kind of like rolling my eyes I approve of myself it's not asking much so i've been just repeating i approve myself over and over and um and it worked and i felt really um i almost

wanted to tag louise hay and my pictures to be like and confidence by louise hay like r.i.p bitch so if you ever anyone's feeling low put on just go to youtube and type in louise hay and she has meditations or like little speeches for like anything you're struggling with. It's pretty great. And then, did you like having a friend there? Yes. Oh my God. It was so nice because, so I got a plus one, which is actually a controversy today because

Chrishell Strauss, who was nominated, did not get a plus one. So I guess if you're nominated, you don't get a plus one. But if you're presenting, you're actually part of the show. But if you're nominated, unless you win, you're not a part of the show. But I got a plus one, which is a coveted thing. Who knew? And I was struggling with who to invite. I just wanted someone who would appreciate all the celebs someone who would be low maintenance someone who would be good arm candy all the things and um and chris i was like asking chris like who should i take because this is i don't want to waste it but i also don't necessarily need to go with anyone if there's not someone that's a good fit. I can totally be fine on my own. And he was like, what about Esther Pofitsky? And he's never really even met Esther, but he just

knows that I like yearn for her to be like closer to her. And man, it was the best choice because I wrote her, she was down. She had to go get COVID tested. She had to like, you know, get a cute outfit and all the stuff. So it's like a lot of work. And she was my plus one and we walked the red carpet together. And it was just so perfect because man, I just wish everyone had someone like Esther in their life. I thank God I have so many girlfriends like this that are just don't say anything shady. They're just completely nice and honest and easy, easy, easy, easy. And I don't think, I don't think that many girls have this in their lives. Like she's just a stable person who has a lot of confidence and that confidence, but she just like, talk about accepting yourself. She's Louise Hay, the shit out of herself. Like she's someone I really look to for advice when I'm like

going through stuff because she just she loves herself in a healthy way she's so funny she just is who she is she also so she we rock the red carpet and we're walking out and it was kind of like do we do it this alone and I was like let's do a few alone and then I was like but let's like go together and then we were like should we hold hands and I was like yes let's like create Who knows? And it just felt so good to like be with a friend. And I always bring friends with me on the carpet when I can because these photographers, I mean, Esther's a big deal. She's on Dollface, that show.

She's had her own show that I was on that she put me in. Thank God. It was so nice of her. Called... Alone Together or something? Alone Together, yes. And she's just done a ton of stuff. put me in thank god it was so nice of her um called alone together alone together yes and um she's just done a ton of stuff if you don't follow follow esther monster on um instagram and tiktok you're crazy she's i was just like i couldn't get enough of her i went home last night and just kept watching her on tiktok and i was like she is so amazing and um yeah we decided to hold hands and

it just felt safe and good and low stress like she didn't need any caretaking I wasn't like having to make sure she didn't feel like she wasn't feeling special enough because she some people didn't know her name on the red carpet or whatever like they only knew my name because there was like a sign with it with a woman like taking me through because I was a presenter you know and but there was no ego involved. She doesn't have any, there's nothing like that. And that can be rare to find in a female industry friend. And I just loved her for it. It was so nice. And yeah, we just were like freaking out about celebrities. I put it on my Instagram. Olivia Wilde just suddenly appeared out of nowhere. It was like seeing a like Bambi she is so stunning she's just as like beautiful

as you'd want she did not have hair extensions in which i respected i definitely did let me just say my my whole thing of like never doing hair extensions again because i wanted to like normalize having normal hair that's gone okay just know i want to keep you guys i want to keep it honest no one no one is not wearing hair extensions including me i am wearing i had so much of some woman's hair i don't know where she is it she had a great life though because it was so conditioned and so beautiful and silky and i just kept feeling it all night long and it's gone now and now it feels so coarse but i I'm back on the extension train. It was so fun to have them.

And it's like, who cares? But I did see a girl getting the kind that you have the other day at the salon, Noah. It's so intense. It's such an intense. She was like getting her head sewed into. Honestly, it's worth the...

It's not even painful. It's just like a little bit of discomfort. It's worth it's worth the it's not even painful it's just like a little bit of discomfort it's worth it though have you ever thought of doing clip-ins because they're so fucking easy um well i had clip-ins before this and i thought they were hard to maintain i just want something like more permanent and unless you don't have to like worry about it yeah yeah like these last way longer than the clip-ins and all that stuff. Easier to manage. Yeah, I can't do the lash extensions either where they just grow out. I just, anything that's like stuck to the thing, I get nervous. I just want to be able to take it out at the end of the night.

I like strip lashes. I peel them off. Chris thinks they're little bugs all over the house every single time. I also got a spray tan. I mean, I was faked up. My spray tan, it was so funny the next day chris was like do you have a handprint on you because he came over to like rub my back because i was feeling sick the other day and um he came over to rub my back and he showed me his

hand and it looked like you know like when people like vote in foreign countries and they're like they have like their hands stay i don't know there was an episode of veep where they like voted and their thumbs were green his hand was stained brown on his palm and it looked like um i don't know what it looked like it looked he had brown he had black hand um and he could have been canceled although i think black people's hands are actually like lighter colored like on their palms so i don't even know what he had but he was like the he was like, I can't get it off. And I'm like, it's going to be about three days, babe. It sloughs off. But yeah, I was faked up.

We'll talk more about the People's Choice Awards because I've got more to say right after this. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into John's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio

app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I started to live a double life when I was a teenager. Responsible and driven, and wild and out of control. My head is pounding. I'm confused. I don't know why I'm in jail. It's hard to understand what hope is when you're trapped in a cycle of addiction. Addiction took me to the darkest places. I had an AK-47 pointed at my head. But one night, a new door opened,

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Don't wait to follow up. Whether you're a new grad, an established professional, or contemplating a career change, Get Hired is for you. Listen to Get Hired with Andrew Seaman on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast or wherever you like to listen. And we're back. So we get through the red carpet. We go to our seat. I am seated at a table. It's just me and esther but the

um we're seated right next to the housewives so there's like kathy hilton lisa rena crystal i forget her last name minkoff crystal minkoff something um i should know her name because she's my favorite and we used to we hosted an e-show one day or co-hosted and she was really nice to me um and then one some of the other ones i don't care about the housewives i never have i've never followed it but my mom i know would have freaked out um it was yeah they showed a shot they were like in the table right next to you right next to us you could like hear them exciting shouldn't i we could hear them but i don't think they were i wasn't trying to hear them actually i was we were mostly just like whispering about our lives me and esther and like just talking about like we're like catching up as you know ryan reynolds was like accepting an award we would be

like i'd be like so like are you still into podcasting like how do you feel about it and like what do you think i should do on tiktok like we were just talking about like like we were just in the back of a school bus and ryan reynolds is like crying about his family or whatever um yeah i like running ryan reynolds a lot he's a class act lizzo also class act her her award she like got a bunch of time and she gave it all to these like women that are all running organizations to help women and it was like she it's and there were like 30 25 of them and she went through each of them and gave a biography and these are women that like everyone's like they, and there were like 30, 25 of them. And she went through each of them and gave a biography. And these are women that like, everyone's like, everyone's clapping.

But like, really, this is like, people want star power. And so I know that Eliza did something where she, they were like, we're going to give you an icon award. And she's like, the only way I'll accept this is if you let me give time to these women. Because this was unheard of. I've never seen people who are not celebrities celebrated for so long and like a big i mean it was probably six minutes of her just reading off people's bios of like this woman removed landmines from an area this person fights for transgender rights but you would give like a detailed biography and there's this whole

row of women so you're kind of counting like oh my my God, we're going to long to go. It was awesome. And, um, and you could tell. So then Lizzo later on accepted an award for like best song of the year or whatever. And she comes out and because she didn't use her icon award time to like sing, which they probably wanted her to do a song.

And she was like, no, I'm going to do this instead either to take it or leave it. They could probably go, okay, we'll take it. I think she gave them a little bit of a song because at her acceptance speech she was like she gave she sang a little bit she sang acapella and it was amazing she sang the star spangled banner just

kidding um just kidding and um so i just like like looking at the politics of everything and then ryan reynolds his speech if you listen carefully he name drops his production company like 18 times yes even though it's all about like we need to come together but you know Moonlight Ride we're doing amazing things like he just kept saying his dumb production company over and over and maybe they are doing great things but like everyone has a bottom line they're all trying to make money but Lizzo was not Lizzo was just actually using her time for good. And I thought it was really cool. That's why she's the people's champion. She is the people's champion.

She's fucking awesome. And I just loved watching her video montage made me cry. What was that? What was it like to see her in person? She was so far away that it felt like I'm more intimate with her on TikTok. You know what I mean? She's more close up. Like I see her ass dimples every single day.

I see her like, her sigh feels like it is like wrapped around my head every day because it's so close up. So from far, even in the same room as her, I will say that she's just, I don't know. I was just excited. I was excited to be in the same room as her,

and I was excited to hear her sing that little bit. She's just got an amazing voice. But then there was this one woman who sang Lauren Conrad Spencer. I think that's her name. She sang this song called, um, Oh God. What's the name of it?

The sweatsuit. Yes. And the ponytail. She was kind of dressed like Billie Eilish. Eilish. Billie Eilish. Billie. Yeah.

She was, she was Billie fake eyelash. And no, I saw her on the red carpet and I was like, who's this kind of like Billie Eilish wannabe? And then all of a sudden she has like the most amazing voice and she has this song called Fingers Cross. So it's all about like, I wish you said you love me without your fingers crossed. It's so good. And I instantly, Esther came back to the table from the bathroom and this girl was singing. She goes, who is this? And I go, I just looked her up on Spotify I'm adding her now this is incredible

so I love discovering that new artist um at one point Heidi Klum walked by my table and like bumped into my chair in a way that like shook me but I didn't think anything of it because we're really like all kind of crowded into this section where all of the tables tables are and then i heard oh excuse me sorry and i'm like and i turn around i'm like oh my god it's heidi klum just said sorry like she's good in my book the rest of my life because she apologized me when she didn't need to i wouldn't have even been like who's that bitch bumping into me i just was like on my phone and didn't care but she like made a point to be like i'm'm sorry, excuse me. You are out. And then, oh, and then I saw her backstage after I'd said clean slate, like that girl can do no wrong.

She could spit in my face and I'd still be like, she's a good person. She, I left my purse like on this couch backstage in this like holding area. And I had to go to the bathroom. I went and like, you know, took care of business. And I came back and my, I felt so bad because she had moved to the couch. I went and like, you know, took care of business. And I came back and my, I felt so bad because she had moved to the couch I was, my purse was on.

And you could tell she kind of like moved it to the side so she could sit. So my purse was just like taking up a seat. When I left, there was like no one in the room. And then all of a sudden she's like sitting next to my purse and I could tell she had to like touch it. I sometimes feel like so burdened when like people have to like touch and move my things.

Like she probably like was wearing like a lip gloss would fall out or something. And I felt so bad that she even had to like touch and move my things. Like she probably like was wearing like a lip gloss would fall out or something. And I felt so bad that she even had to like look at my purse, even though it was beautiful and expensive. And I had to give it back. And I was very worried I was going to spill bronzer in it. But then I went up and I go, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. And like moved it. And she looked at me very confused.

And I go, well, okay, we're back to net zero. Like she just like whatever goodwill I'd given her, I was like taking it away. But she was very personable. She was making eye contact with people and smiling and being like, very like, hi, hello, hi. Like she's, and she looked stunning.

And then also Kris Jenner. Okay, yes. I'm glad you bring up Kris Jenner because I was going to say, Heidi Klum's dress looked really hard to manage. But I think Kris Jenner, if you give a prize for like the most unmanageable dress it was really chris jenner i didn't even see her dress well apparently when i got up to go backstage to the holdings area before i presented esther said that chloe and and chris sat at our table with us and i missed it because I was in the back.

I missed Shania and I missed sitting at the same table as Chloe and Chris. And she said that Chloe and Chris did not look and make eye contact with anyone, like with her or anyone. So I think they're so used to like everyone wanting something from them. They probably just shut off eye contact and like avoid it. Because I found that if you don't make eye contact with people, you don't have to talk to them. That's how people have an in where they go, oh, hi, you know, they wave.

But if you just kind of avoid it, you can get away with like, I just didn't see you. But then I was walking back to my seat and Kris Jenner was crossing kind of in the backstage area. And I saw her and I go, I love you. And she goes, oh, hi, hi. And like kind of, and we almost like had a moment and like talked. She definitely acknowledged me, definitely said hi. And it was thrilling thrilling and then a camera caught it and i go did you catch that please will you send me that footage so the footage is out there somewhere of me freaking out

um and then we went to i did my part i flubbed a line like right away it was so scary because i walked out on stage there was no rehearsal by the way they're just like here's your mark walk there they're very you know tell you exactly where to go and how to stand and whatever but I walk up and my this my speech what I'm supposed to say is not on the prompter it's just blank and I'm walking and then it all of a sudden the laughter or the clapped claptor claps dies down and there's still nothing on things. So I am panic mode. And then all of a sudden it comes up and I'm so like overwhelmed by having to like, I was about to just start and go, well, there's nothing on the prompter, but I'm going to wing it. Listen, every night, like I was getting ready to just go into that. And then all of a sudden it showed up

because, so it kind of like made me stumble over my words a little bit, but I always stumble in these scenarios. Like, I don't mind it. It's never really come back to bite me. It's never made me feel like I'm a failure. I don't like, I don't walk away from it being like, I fucked it up. Like, I'm never going to work again, which I think I used to be like, but I think every time I presented an award, which has been maybe twice, I have stumbled over the lines and I'm good at reading teleprompter, but it just, I don't know. I didn't get a chance to practice it enough or whatever. It was fine. But then, and then that was over and I was like, good to go.

And then Esther and I watched the rest of the show. And then we went to the after party where we hung out with Nick. Did you see David Spade? No, David wasn't there. It was pre-taped. So if you see the video of me on betches that i posted on my instagram and it's david presenting to adam sandler it cuts to me and you can hear me whispering to or telling esther full volume this was pre-taped

and so he's like right we saw my face up on the screen and i go oh no like thank god no one could you can't really read my lips but if you watch it again you will totally know that i'm saying this was pre-taped because i i saw um david was either nominated or something and i was like are you gonna be there and he was like no and so i think uh sandler wasn't available so they had to but it was so funny because the, in the place where the, the wards were, it was like, it was in an airplane hangar.

So it wasn't like a typical like seating. And then we're all facing one direction. There were rewards being presented all around us. So when David came up on screen, people were like looking for like, what stage is he on? Like it took about 30 seconds to realize like, oh,

he's not here. The funniest thing though was that one of the biggest applause moments in the whole show was when someone casually mentioned Taylor Swift. They were like artists like Ed Sheeran, Taylor Swift, like, and then Taylor Swift and people fucking lost their minds. Like she was there.

I'm like, this is the power of this woman is that just the mention of her name, she wasn't there. There was no way she would be there. It was like someone listing a bunch of artists but people still like freaked out and it just made me happy but also like,

I can tell how annoyed everyone is with Taylor Swift fans. Like people are just kind of like, I've been seeing a lot of people just, I guess I saw Esther post something last night on TikTok and she was, she had posted something on TikTok about evidence that she's, or things about her that make her a pick-me girl, but that she's not actually a pick-me girl. Do you know what a pick-me girl is? What is a pick-me girl? It's, actually a pick me girl do you know what a pick me girl is a pick me girl it's it sounds like i'm saying pig me a pick me girl is like a girl that's like oh me me me me me like look at me like oh my god i hate the word moist oh my god i'm always cold or

like just trying to get attention like a girl that's just desperate and like trying to be quirky and doesn't really have that much going for her otherwise so she has to like come up with little things that make her interesting so esther was like doing this really funny list on tiktok i really recommend following her and i'm not even into tiktok but i'm about to be i'll get to that in a second and um but esther one of esther's was like i have small feet i know that seems like a pick me girl thing because anytime it comes up people it seems like i'm trying to get attention because they're very small. I'm a woman size five. It's just the way it is. And then her other one was like, I don't really like Taylor Swift. And that's almost like a pick-me-girl thing of being like, I'm different than other girls. I don't like Taylor

Swift. And she was like, I know it sounds like a pick-me-girl thing. I just don't have that much enthusiasm for her. But it was really cute because I had just been with her and she was like I don't know I'm not one of these girls that when someone mentions Taylor Swift I like get really excited and I was like oh my god she she filmed this like you know weeks ago but then she was with me all night anytime Taylor was mentioned I was like oh my god wait so wait what's your favorite song like what so what are you thinking about like what's the next album like I was being that all night long and um it is obnoxious and I um I admit to it so the after party was cool though because it was chill it was there weren't a lot of big celebs there it was just like low-key it wasn't super loud. And so we just ended up, Esther and I talked for

a little bit like alone and we just got to like hang. It was so fun. I love a good girl hang. All I want to do is sit in a corner with my girlfriends and talk about life and like real things and like sex and feelings and not even sex. Like we just talked about feelings and our issues and I don't know. It's just awesome. I just, I feel so bad for men. They never have those conversations. But I think they're almost like the way Esther feels about Taylor Swift.

Like, good, I don't want to have those. But Nick Vile was there from The Bachelor. He's an old friend of mine. So it was so good to see him and his girlfriend. And he, it was, yeah yeah i love running into him and it had been a while and then he was he wells from bachelor in paradise was also there with his wife sarah highland from modern family and she was so cool because at one they came and like joined us and then there was this other girl with them who was just so, I mean, I can't, I don't even understand where these people come from.

Apparently this woman latched on to Wells and Sarah at the show. And then there were kind of shuttle buses going to the party. And she demanded to get in their ride. Not even their bus, their car. Like their car service. And she's like, I'm just going to go with you guys. Is that cool? Like, and didn't really give them an option.

She's some drunk girl that's like claiming to be like a high-powered lawyer and just talks the entire way she comes over to our table and she's like i know who you are she sidles up next to me then she's like oh my god i know who you are you're esther she's she knows who everyone is then she says to nick she's like my friend in front of nick's girlfriend it's just like no one wants to hear this my friend actually dated you and said you were so dumb but the truth is she's dumb like you're one of the smartest people ever i watch you and she was like he's so boring and i was like none of this needs to be said what why do people do this where they go where they they how do people not know that sharing something that someone else said about this person is not going to win you points with this person.

People do it to me all the time. My fucking wife hates you, but I think you're so funny. Or like, that doesn't feel good. It doesn't make me think you're cooler. It doesn't give you any points to tell me how much someone else doesn't like me. It happens all the time, though. And I wanted to fucking punch this woman when she was like but seriously you're one of the smartest men ever and my friend is like and I go first of all you're a bad friend you're talking about your

friend and how dumb she is and secondly she's one of these girls too who like needs to tell people they're so smart like you are so intelligent like I know like I because I'm smart oh she was the worst and um and then she goes and I need a picture with nikki yeah oh wait hold on so you were just talking about how you had this wonderful time sitting in the corner with esther and then a couple of other people joined and you were still having a great time and then all it takes is that one toxic person to come and then you guys have to kind of like disperse to get rid of her yeah it's like a fly like a cup takes a couple swats like not mean but like it's gonna take a little bit i know enough now that these people aren't gonna stay forever

because i'm not a pushover anymore and i really won't tolerate that anymore and i don't think anyone else the table was really going to tolerate it past a moment like a certain like minute i think we all would have like gotten her out of there but it was like I just felt bad for this woman like how does she exist in life where she thinks everything's about her and then she hands Nick her phone is like you need to take a picture of me and Nikki and I go okay professor because she kept saying he was so smart I was like professor take a picture of us so she's already insulted him but also you know blanketed it with like i know you're so smart my friend is an idiot but she thought you were really dull it's just like you are the fucking

worst and then she was like wouldn't say her friend's name so he couldn't be like who was this she was just sucked but then out of nowhere this woman sitting next to me sarah highland who has just sat down across the table who i had said hi to on the red carpet but we don't know each other and i don't know if she knows me I definitely know who she is she's the oldest daughter in modern family I've been following her for some time I think she's like so funny and cute and um and I knew she was married to Wells and Wells I knew from before he was on The Bachelor I remember going to a radio station in Nashville to just promote my zany shows probably 10 years ago

11 years ago and he was this hot dj that had like a bulldog and i remember being like oh my god wow usually they're not like this attractive so i noted him and then when he showed up on the bachelor i was like i know that guy so anyway marries sarah and uh i said hi to sarah on the red carpet um but then at the after party she she was just sitting across the table we had just kind of said hello but this woman is sitting next to me still talking and she just comes over she was nikki i have to tell you something oh my god you're gonna freak out and she was like hold on i have to tell nikki something so she sits down next to me and like leans over me and is like girl it is so good to see you i have been dying to tell you like seriously you're gonna die like she's such

obviously such a good actress. But this girl did not feel like it was it was it wasn't obvious. It was so real. And also I was like, are we best friends? Like she was selling it so hard and like kind of laying all over me. I was like, this is my night of like, trying out being gay, like just girls all like holding hands and this girl like flapping over me and like, just like I don't have girlfriends that are super touchy feely. Like, oh girl. Like, and she was like playing that way. And I was like, oh my God, we're best friends. But she saved me.

It was awesome. And I was like, you are incredible. Me and Esther were both like, that was the smoothest move. So then the girl kind of left. And then, and then we would just started talking to Sarah and man, she had such great stories. I can't get into them because, but man, I was like, I just got to ask questions that I've always wanted to ask of like someone who's been in the business for a while of like who she's been around people who have since been canceled, who I know she has probably

been on their shows or worked with. And she was just telling amazing stories it was like I don't know it was just so I want that girl to write a book someday she's really smart really funny and um I was just very impressed and made a new friend and you're just kind of sitting there going like is this real like is this person really someone that would like be my like how am I gonna see this person I don't know but it felt it felt real and this is what i kind of like about these nights is that i was telling esther like it just makes you realize how small all of this is and how it's kind of like a high school play like we're all just putting on a production and being like everything's perfect here presenting the next

award like we're using this voice and we're all on the red carpet like, hi, I have a bunch of fake hair. It's like, we're playing pretend. We're playing movie stars. Like, nothing. It's just as fake as if you were trying to pretend to be that. Do you know what I'm saying? And everyone just wants to be loved and seen and feel beautiful. And it's not much different than my 20-year reunion.

It felt kind of the same energy, to be honest. And really it was like, it just, there are certain people though that have this aura where you're like, oh my God, like Shania Twain. Like I just didn't even want to be, I just didn't want to get in her way. Heidi Klum, same way where you're just like, I don't want them to have to like waste any energy on me

because they're just so busy and so precious. But it was a really fun night and I'm glad that i did i couldn't sleep last night i got home and uh i was on the way home and i have not been able to like really sing midnights in a car alone um and i have i've had in st louis like a couple days where i've been able to put my airpods in but singing with your airpods in you don't get to like hear your voice with the music and my mom's car that i drive does not have a way for me to play the music on the system so last night she this woman was my driver and i was just like can i put on my music and do you mind if i sing and i just sang the fuck out of songs. It felt so good. And I got home and I was like, God, I want to play guitar so badly.

It sucks. Why didn't I bring my guitar? Always bring your guitar, Nikki. Always. And then I walked to the lobby to pick up my food that I had ordered. And there's a guitar sitting there. And I go, can I bring this to my room? And they go, no, but we have ones you can rent so i got to rent a tiny baby taylor guitar and take

it up to my room and make sweet sweet love to it no definitely whatever i did do it um it didn't like um it became a worse guitar from what i did do it but um and then returned it this morning i was like that's such a cool thing to have um because i was like what am i gonna do and i just i couldn't sleep last night partly adrenaline partly just my times being so fucked up um and i don't know what to do i have an audition that's due it was due monday and it's wednesday and i was supposed to do um i was supposed to have it in monday and i told them i would and it's for a role in a movie where i would play the wife and the guy cast as the husband role is like one of my favorite like actors where i'd be like oh this would be a dream to like get to work with this person and like just

look at them up close and maybe even like fake kiss them did you hear margot robbie like asked to kiss brad pitt in a scene she's like i don't care and everyone's like what if the roles were reversed can you imagine well you know what fuck you shut up listen the reason why you can't do this all the time where you go like the word if the were reversed, if Brad Pitt added a scene, yeah, it would be more predatory. You know why? Because Brad Pitt is a man who can hold women down and make them feel uncomfortable.

And she's a light little woman. And yeah, I definitely know that women can make men feel sexually uncomfortable. I've seen it happen before. I am disgusted by it. I am very outspoken about it. But I don't think Margot Robbie being like, I think this needs a kiss scene. disgusted by it i am very outspoken about it but i don't think margot robbie being like i think there's news of kissing i don't think that really inconvenienced brad pit single brad pit too much

but everyone's like playing like oh if it were flipped around the reason why you can't do that with everything is because men can hold you down and rape you women can't women aren't strong enough to incapacitate a man and that's why you don't get to flip all these scenarios and be like, well, if a man did that, if a man did that, or if a woman did that to a man, he'd push her off. If a man did that to a woman, we can't push you off. That's what it comes down to. And I know that Noah does jujitsu and she could fucking do a body slam roll and flip you off no matter how big you are. But most women are not like that. So that is the difference come at me um so yeah i gotta get this audition in but i just i don't know auditioning is so awkward i don't know how to do it right can you talk about giving me tips

last night can can you talk about how you got the backstreet boys thing did you have to audition for that yeah talk about acting no i don't get you have to audition for that? Yeah, talk about acting. No. I don't audition for anything because it never goes well for me. I've auditioned every... I've never booked anything I've auditioned for. Ever. I repeat. I've never booked anything

I've auditioned for. How many auditions have I been on in my life? Hundreds, you guys. Hundreds. Rejection after rejection. No... Just... You don't even hear back. No callbacks. I'm not, I don't even get callbacks. And that's like, I'm just bad at auditioning. I get nervous. I'm not my best self. So I wait for people to put me in things. I had to get famous other ways where people go, oh, you'd be great in this role. And once I get it, I'll fucking kill it. But I'm not going to be good at auditioning for it. I auditioned for Trainwreck for the role that was written for me called Nikki.

And I didn't even get that. And Vanessa Bayer got it. And she definitely deserved it over me. But this is the kind of thing I'm talking about. So I don't normally audition anymore. This is the one I'm talking about today. I'm only doing it because the actor in it. I'm just like this.

You can't not throw your hat in the fucking ring. So, Backstreet Boys though, I'm in their Christmas special coming up. I don't know what the date is for it. December 14th, baby.

Thank you. December 14th, baby. It'll be on ABC. It's a Backstreet Boys special, Christmas special and it's funny and I got, how did that come about? Oh, I a reaction i got a text from a comic who was writing on it this is how this happens yeah people go we

need this role filled and if you're just nice to people you don't know who is going to end up in places where they can give you a fucking job like i just wrote about um i just did an interview for my um carpool karaoke with wilco i guess that's coming out at some point i taped it back in march but it's coming out and they asked me like how did that happen and i go because i knew a producer at conan who i had great experiences with working with her she liked me we text we text back and forth because we're just friendly i'm not like sucking her dick so she likes me like i'm just a nice person and then it comes back to you because they go oh i'd like to work with this girl again so that's you got to be nice to people it's come back to help me so much

in life and this girl erin uh erin dewey lennox she hit me up just texted me being like hey they're gonna send this offer for you it's for backstreet boys christmas special and i'm like say no more i will pay to be in this like i i will what what do i need to do um how new do i need to get and she was like it's an easy you're like a sycophantic fan like you play a fan and then uh i got to do it with ron funches so me and ron funches are like uber fans of backstreet boys i got to set set. This was, I filmed this last week, Wednesday, last Wednesday. It was crazy because I'm like, usually you film Christmas things in like August. And you have to be like, happy holidays. And you're like, it's 104 degrees.

But this time it was like, whoa, this is like actually Christmas. And you walk on set and it's just like this beautiful Christmas set. And I got there and I'm excited because I don't know your relationship with the Backstreet Boys. You probably were like not into that. So not into them. Yeah. I was like,

I was aware I was, it was 1998, 99. I went to a Backstreet Boys concert at the Kiel Center with Kirsten, I think at one point, cause my dad got free tickets. I like Backstreet's back. All right.

I like, um, show me the meaning of being lonely i love that song i like a lot of their songs but and i always thought out of all of them who do you think's the hottest um i plead the fifth you don't know okay i always was into kevin i it was the first but i was too young it was like eighth grade and I was like, these are men. They didn't feel like boys back then. They were in their twenties and I'm

fourteen. It just didn't feel like right to pine after these guys. I wasn't in that place in my life. Even in sync, I was just like, ugh, no. But Kevin is the oldest. He's a decade older than the youngest person in the group. But there was something about him and I couldn't tell anyone that I felt feelings for Kevin because

he was just like he was just a man and it felt like naughty that I was like attracted to this like man in the group he was tall dark and handsome and um so he was my fave and he uh I got there I go into hair and makeup and i can like the backstreet boys are walking through my makeup the makeup room to get to their like holding area and i swear to god aj is so nice and so funny aj from the backstreet boys he um walked in and i swear to god he uh put on his phone before he entered the room he queuedued up, back streets, back, all right. And then he walked in, he was like, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. And he like walked up, he was like,

hey, he was like, they were so freaking nice. So grateful for me to be there. Thanking me profusely, telling me like how big of fans they are and like really proving it too. And then Kevin walks in, statuesque Kevin. He looked like an oracle he had this he's so tall he has this long black hair that's shiny his face is exactly like it was in 1999 he's so tall he looks like a a wise man like one of like the christian wise men and he had

he just he looks like keanu reeves i'm like this guy cannot go anywhere without being stopped he looks so famous he looked like some kind of like i don't know maybe that he like was the leader of some kind of cult too i didn't know i was ready to join he came up he was so nice he put his arm around me he was like i just want to let you know we were on this past tour we watched f boy island i am obsessed with it i I'm obsessed. It was so nice. And then we did the scenes and God, these guys were just like so kind and appreciative. That goes such a long way when people are just like, thank you for doing this. Thank you for taking it. I'm like, you're a Backstreet Boy. I would do anything to me. I would be like a lighting guy on set. Like you guys are the Backstreet Boys. There's, that is a level of fame that you don't see anymore.

That's only like so few people get to touch. And Ron and I were just kind of marveling at it, like looking at them like, this is, it's rare to be in the company of people who went through that. Like, I don't think even last night I was, maybe Lizzo out of all those people have, know anything about like how being that famous. It's just a different level. My biggest fear all day, though, was accidentally calling Nick Carter Aaron. That was my biggest fear.

Because his brother just died. I don't want to say his brother's name. But it was on my mind of like, don't say Aaron. And then I'm like, wait a second. What if I say it? Because I'm trying not to. So I was so scared. And I had to do a couple lines with him but he was so nice and so sweet and they were all just like funny and cool it was a great day and I'm excited to see it um

and yeah that was uh that's been my last couple weeks it's been it's been non-stop and I'm really tired but I'm so glad that I get to do this stuff. It's not lost on me. It's still fun. FBoy Island did get cancelled. It was announced that we got cancelled a couple days ago. I got all these calls from

one of the co-producers of the show, Bill and he was like I don't know if you've seen variety and i don't i haven't he's like i'm sure your phone's blowing up i'm like by you and he's like don't believe anything you're reading and i'm like i haven't read anything tell me what you're talking about and he's like it said variety says f boy island's canceled and then the next day in my google alerts it's like i have a google alert for my name and it's like fy island cancel f well like people are so excited either people are excited it's canceled because they're like yeah it's fucking dumb shows going away or people are

devastated it's mostly devastated because it's a hit show why is it canceled there was no indication of this happening but i just want to say it is not done you guys know how this stuff works at this point one network gives up on a show it jumps to something else so it will find a home f boy will never die I hope ever um but the truth is like things have changed I think discovery network bought HBO max and it's just budget things you know like, like they just, it's a very expensive show to make. Not because of me necessarily, but it's just, that's why it looks so fucking good. It's expensive to make. And I think the producers don't want to like skimp on, on production. And so it's going to find another home. Just you wait. I cannot wait. But that was kind of sad to just be like, oh,

it's canceled. And just see that word. Because guess what? Discovery also didn't pick up a ton of other shows on the HBO Max slate, but they weren't announced as canceled. We just weren't picked up. It doesn't mean canceled. And this has happened to me for every show I've ever done in my entire life. Anything you do will go away at some point. It will find another network, but everything will be canceled. And it's kind of nice because I've had so many shows canceled that I don't care. I don't take it personally. I do take many things personally. And there are some things in life that hold me up so much, like a bad comment, someone just being like, she thinks she's cool or someone not understanding my motives of something. Or I don't know,

someone saying I look old. There's little things that could set me off, but, you know, flubbing a line at the People's Choice Awards or having a show canceled, I can get through it. I can get through that because I approve of myself. I approve of myself. I approve of myself. That's how she says it. Go listen to Louise Hay. We'll be right back. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

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My head is pounding. I'm confused. I don't know why I'm in jail. It's hard to understand what hope is when you're trapped in a cycle of addiction. Addiction took me to the darkest places. I had an AK-47 pointed at my head. But one night, a new door opened, and I made it into the rooms of recovery. The path would have roadblocks and detours, stalls and relapses.

But when I was feeling the most lost, I found hope with community. And I made my way back. This season, join me on my journey through addiction and recovery. A story told in 12 steps. Listen to CRIMS as part of the Michael Lura Podcast Network. Available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The insights behind what it takes to create a world-renowned product. Then tune in to my podcast, Building One. There's so much to learn, like how Patagonia innovates with its supply chain. We had to go out to farmers and convince them it was really damn hard.

Or the way Adobe thinks about the first interaction somebody has with Photoshop. I was always so fascinated by how people navigate and find their way. Ever wanted to know how Nike builds emotion into the Jordan brand? You have to be obsessed with the current state of the human condition. And it doesn't stop there. What about how Gleam reinvented knowledge search with AI? You can learn about how a Michelin star chef is redesigning seeds for flavor and how Pixar is nurturing a creative culture. Listen to Building One on the iHeartRadio app, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you know that companies hire the most in the first two months of the year, or that nearly half of workers are worried about being left behind? I am Andrew Seaman, LinkedIn's Editor-at-Large for Jobs and Career Development,

and my show Get Hired brings you all the information you need to, well, get hired. behind. I am Andrew Seaman, LinkedIn's Editor-at-Large for Jobs and Career Development, and my show Get Hired brings you all the information you need to, well, get hired. People are forming opinions of you even before you log into the Zoom or walk into the room, and so you really have to think about what is it I want to display. You don't plant a garden and then just walk away and expect it to thrive. You are in there pulling out the weeds. You're pruning it. You're watering it. It's the same thing with your network. You should always be in there actively managing your network. If you don't feel confident to say a number, even admitting that to a recruiter is going to be far better than saying, well, what is your budget for the role? A lot is in the follow

up, right? Don't wait to follow up. Whether you're a new grad, an established professional, or contemplating a career change, Get Hired is for you. Listen to Get Hired with Andrew Seaman on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you like to listen. All righty. Let's get to good old-fashioned fanthrax. Hell yes. What do the people have for us noah what are the besties up to okay we got a lot of really great messages i think i'll start off with annie annie hey nikki noah and hopefully jules because honestly jules is my favorite guest co-host on the pod

I'm literally just calling because right now I'm watching The Masked Singer and to be honest I already knew Snowstorm was Nikki I'm only 24 minutes into this episode so like anything could happen in this however I'm convinced this is Nikki

Snowstorm, The House, welcome home, Nikki Glaser. Yes. And the unsafe box, not safe. It's all there. I mean, we all know it. All of us. All of us know this. Yes.

So awesome. I don't know how you pulled this off. I'm so excited for you. Like they're comparing you to uh sabrina carpenter and olivia robrigo you're freaking probably gonna win this episode which means you're probably gonna met i'm assuming bet middler because i'm pretty sure that pumpkin head is bet middler like this is so awesome and i'm just so excited and good job nikki i literally saw this clue saying i was was like, fuck yeah, Nikki.

That's totally you. Okay. Anyways, have a good day and happy Mousinger. And Jack, the Jackalope. Oh, my God. I'm sorry. No, you're so great. I love it at the end there.

She's like, should I re-record it and do a better one? No. Jackalopes are awesome, though. They're like bunnies with horns. Thank you so much. That felt like a message I got from like a friend who was like, we haven't talked since college, but I'm watching my singer. I'm freaking out at you.

Like that just felt like sometimes, I would say most of the time I meet besties. I'm like, you just have the same cadence and compassion that I sense from like my best friends. So it's so nice to hear that. And, uh, yeah, I don't know how I pulled it off either. It's hard to keep a secret. Um, and how did I pull off that mask? Well, with a lot of help from people who like were very gentle cause it was so fucking heavy and I didn't get to keep it. And, um, and I am on a Christmas special tonight,

which I, by the time this podcast comes out, I'm sure it's already aired, but you can go watch me sing. Um, there's a mass singer Christmas special Wednesday night on Fox, which is tonight. And I'm singing Ariana Grande's Santa. Wait, Santa.

Tell me that song. Do you know that song? Noah? No, it sounds beautiful. So good. At first when they gave it to me, I was like, oh God, can I just do like Deck the Halls? Like, can I just do a song that's like Frosty the Snowman?

Like just basic, easy. I have to learn a new, because I didn't know that song at all. And you have to learn a new song. And it's kind of, it took a minute and I, you know, it took like a day for me listening over and over. And now it's my favorite Christmas song. If you don't add santa tell me it should be an instant classic it is as good as mariah carey's um you know that one that

she sings a lot uh that that one movie made famous it's santa tell me watch me on the mass singer sing it but then actually go back and listen to the real version but i'm obsessed i'm learning it on guitar i love it so much thank you for guessing it was me it was so nice are you back in your uh snowstorm costume are you wearing something else yes i so i filmed let me be honest i filmed it in july so this was filmed like before i got kicked off the show but we just did it as an added episode and i got a little choreography going in this one too so i dance a little a very very little bit um which made it so much more fun because most of the time i'm asking her i didn't know what to do with my body i wasn't really given much notes about what to do and then all of a sudden we

did this christmas one and this woman comes out and starts choreographing me and i go where have you been can i get you for the other stuff i don't know what to do with my hand i don't know anything i don't know how to move in this It would have been so nice because it felt so good to have something to do while I sang. And you can't really do much in that costume, so you're limited. So it was very simple steps, but I'm excited to see it tonight because it was my favorite song to sing of all the ones I sang. And yeah, it's such a good song. Add it to your playlist for Christmas time.

Don't fight it. Just let a new christmas song in your heart all right next fan tracks all right here's one from alexis with something that i think a lot of besties can relate to i know that i can hi nikki andrew and noah this is alexis i'm actually from davenport iowa where where Nikki just did a show. Unfortunately, I couldn't go because I'm actually living in Australia for my job for a year. Really? But I just wanted to call in because I have been talking to friends and family on the phone a lot more now that I live across the world. And I found myself that when I start to say my goodbyes on the phone, that I want to say, don't be cut and jackpot.

That's so nice. Every single day. So I just wanted to call that in and tell you that that's always in the back of my mind when I hang up the phone with my mom. I have to literally stop myself from saying it. Oh my God. Thank you so much for all that you do. I love listening to you when the time zone is off and I can't talk to friends and family at home and I feel like I have friends here. So thank you so much. Jackaroo.

Jackaroo. Oh my God. Is that a real animal? That was so nice. And no, that doesn't happen to me. I feel like it's very like I need to be in this room. It's very situational for me. I need to be in the setting.

So does it happen to you, Noah to be in this room it's very situational for me i need to be in the setting so does it happen to you noah do you almost say it sometimes okay what i found myself doing lately is i'll start talking like julie oh yeah in what way like where does it come up i don't just like oh my goodness like if are you kidding me yeah with that shit oh god what i'll tell you it's fine but i'm not doing it all right nick i just need like a julie app with just her julie isms yeah we need to do that with like all of her catchphrases i truly she is so fucking funny i love her so much she makes me laugh hard. She wrote me this morning and she wrote, I asked her to do the pod today, but she couldn't because she's working.

You know, she's staging homes with her friend Debbie. That's an extra. I go, stop taking these jobs, mom. I don't want you working anymore. I told my mom, I will pay you whatever Debbie is paying you. I will pay you to stay home and not do it. And she goes, you're ridiculous. I'm not taking that. And I go, I, it, it matters to me because you're not going to try to hang up

a heavy painting or move some bureau that you're too, you know, when people get older, it must be very hard to relinquish the things you used to just be able to move so easily as a younger person. I can understand how you would fight that. But my mom is getting injured on these jobs. And I'm just like, why are you doing it? But my dad goes, she likes it. I'm like, she's getting injured and you're going to lose her faster than you would like. But she wrote me today. She said, you looked amazing last night. You did such a great job. So proud of you. I mean, if I don't know what the fuck I'm going to do when my parents die. I was telling Esther this last night.

I only do things. So they're proud of me. I literally don't. I, my biggest joy in life is telling them I got something and then doing it and hearing them go like, like I, even last night after I presented, I was just looking at my phone being like, I know they're watching. Did I do that bad? Why haven't they written me yet?

Like, what's going on? And I'm like, why do I need this? And Esther was like, do you think this may be, like, bad that you need that approval? And I go, no. I need, it's not even about, like, I need to feel like a star. And, like, I'm the best. I want people to be proud of me. Like, that is, I think, my, that's what I get off on like I want

I don't need you to go like you're so pretty you're so funny you're so like I just want people to go like wow from what I know of you like this is what it matters most to me when besties say that it when my best friends and

my lover and like my family because you guys and all these other people know the real me which is a little bit insecure a little bit quirky a little bit like more normal than maybe your average celebrity I would think not normal but like a little bit flawed and a little bit maybe just just you brought down to earth in a way so when you see me all glitzed and glammed or on mass singer when you're like i'm so proud of you busty that means so much more to me than like you like you're you i don't know in that the it's i just pinpointed it and it's like pride

what is that and is it sad that i need that validation i need pride i need people to be like i'm proud of you even if it's like wow you went on a run like my mom is always just like you ran four miles oh my god you're amazing and like that does something for me why why can't it be enough would I still do these things in a vacuum probably not do you think most artists would still produce their art in a vacuum with no one i don't you probably didn't get to hear what she said last night but what did she say she said something very similar i feel like a vacuum what sorry she she uh praised her fans for supporting her and kind of being that encouragement through thick and thin and all

that stuff it's it's it sounded very similar to what you just said yeah like just yeah believing just being like but it's so it feels so selfish to want that and to need that of like i want like all my i've talked about this so much of like, you know, I don't feel like my parents are proud. I've complained about it to my girlfriend so much that anytime I do something, they're like, Nikki, we're so proud of you.

And I'm like, Oh God, I've trained them so well. And they're like posting all the links so that they can watch everything. Cause I'm like, I feel like my parents don't even care to watch it. I'll like complain about someone not watching something. And they're like,

so over the top about it. But I need that. I think I just need that i think i just need that like some girls like need i don't know to get their nails done or some shit like i just need people to be proud of me and i don't think it necessarily depends on being famous i will say that i need my loved ones and people who know the real me, i.e. besties, you guys are the only ones, I would say, in my fan base who know me on a personal level like my family does.

You really do know me like my family does. I would venture to guess you probably know more about me than my family does at this point if you've been listening to the show long enough. I want those people to go like, whoa, that's impressive. I want people to be impressed.

This goes back to also what I want in bed. I want to be an impressive whore. I want to be such a whore that people go, I didn't even know you were capable of whoring this much. I just want people to go, wow. I don't know what that is. And I don't know if I need to lose it. But there's some things I don't want to lose.

I think there's a lot of things that we discover about ourselves are character defects, are things that we discover about ourselves are character defects are things that like we need like validation and it seems like self-serving and it seems like it's keeping you from loving yourself and you're supposed to be able to love yourself without getting things from the outside world. I don't need massive amounts of likes. I don't need massive amounts of fans. I don't care if I go to a theater and it's half sold. I don't give a shit. I'm just happy that half people came there. I think i'm not like wow this town fucking sucks they don't get what's up i just go no this half of people do get what's up i'm only sad because like the people

working there like people aren't making money off me and i want to like theater half full kind of gal yes thank you yes i just feel embarrassed i don't feel i don't feel embarrassed i just feel bad for people who are like god we were supposed to make money tonight we didn't that's where i feel bad but i don't feel bad in my soul if i'll take one fan who's proud of me so um i really appreciate that uh message is what i'm trying to say final thought uh So Nikki, you want to give some advice? Yes. Okay. Would love to. So a question from someone who wants to be kept anonymous. Hi, Nojuki.

I'm calling in to ask for some relationship advice. Months ago, my husband gave me the password to his phone and said he has nothing to hide. And I just was feeling kind of suspicious, like something was off the other day. And I went through his phone while he was sleeping with the password that he gave me. And I found this app called Telegram. And on the app, there were all these chats of like nudes and like videos of girls. And were all like local girls like from the towns around us and where we live so they're like real life girls whose nudes are probably unknowingly being sent back and forth between all these chats and it just was really fucking like disturbing to me

and i didn't see any evidence of him talking to any girls on his phone at all i think it's just like creepy guys sending the shit back and forth. I just don't know if I should like bring this up to him and have that difficult conversation of like, I went through your phone when you were sleeping and this is what I found. And like, can you explain this or not? Like I get so scared and anxious about confrontation. And I don't know if I should just keep an eye on this or if it's worth bringing up right now. Again, I thank you so much for any advice you have. Would love to hear your opinions on this. Like Andrew from a guy's perspective, Nikki and Noah, love you all.

And my husband's a jack off. Oh, my God. Okay, so we don't have Andrew's perspective on this one, which would be good to have here, but we're going to try our best. Okay. Noah, I feel she definitely needs to confront him about it. What you need to do though,

what I would do is own your side of things, of like, listen, I'm really sorry. I fucked up and I don't want to do this again. Because what are your options? You either come say what you did, which was you went through his phone without asking while he was asleep or whatever, and he gets mad at you about that, or you keep doing that, and that guilt that you have about doing that to collect information

keeps building up. So you're going to at some point in this have to admit you did that, whether it's down the road, like you're not going to get over this. You're not going to get answers from this unless you get them from him. There's nothing. I don't think you're going to get any more collecting more data. That's going to make you go, Oh, suddenly I don't care about this. And I, we can just, I can die without ever knowing you're going to eventually get to a point where you're like, what the fuck is going on? So just do that sooner than later before you completely like have done it so many times. Cause you're just, it's going to make you feel bad. It's going to make you feel like you

have a lie going between you, which, you know, he may have already started. Um, just go listen. I had a really weak moment. I felt things were off between us. I'm so scared of losing you because I love you so much. If that's true, you can present when you do things like this, like go through someone's phone, a way to soften it. I do. I do believe is to explain like, this is all coming from a place of not wanting to lose you because I love you.

I think that helps people because sometimes they feel so betrayed and you go, it's a, it's a, it was a bad way to go about this, but I promise it was motivated because I just, I'm so scared to lose you. And I know that's, I should have done a different way in the future. I wouldn't do it this way,

but I shouldn't have done it because I found something and I don't even know how to approach you about the thing I found. So I'm just coming clean. You are allowed to be upset with me about this. It's a completely separate issue than the one I want to talk to you about what I found, but I just need you to know, like come clean about your thing and just to talk to you about what I found. But I just need

you to know, like come clean about your thing and just like without confronting him about it at first and like, see what he does work through that and then go now, can we talk about what I saw and make it a separate issue? I think that might be my advice, but I'm really sorry you're going through this and you're feeling that way right now because I hate I hate in relationships when I've done something that I know I shouldn't have done and I have to like carry it around and especially when you also on the other side feel like he's done something that you don't really understand and I do not understand what that app could be and it's nice to know that he has not written anything but god it just sucks to learn that your husband might be like looking at

something that just kind of gives you the willies but at the same time so i love the advice you gave her i think it's a very good way to start the conversation um i guess when i first heard this the local part didn't really stick out to me that much as much as it does this time around. But I honestly think it's just like a guy looking at porn or just wanting to have access to those kinds of images easily, I guess. I don't think it's anything against her or because she's not fulfilling something. I think it's just guys like to look at porn

and it's separate from how he feels about you. So I hope that she goes into it, not taking like a personal offense about it. And just, it's just like, yeah, that, I guess it didn't even touch on the porn part of it.

Like, I don't know though. Like the local thing bothers me because it just feels like I get it because obviously there's something that is attractive to men about hearing about local horny women around you, like in your area, because it's all over porn. You watch porn. There's always like people fucking in your neighborhood waiting for you. Yeah. And these guys are not actually meeting up with these women, but just the illusion that they're close makes them hornier. So I do believe that this is just a type of porn like local porn so it doesn't mean he's like oh i could fuck these

women they lived on the street it just makes it sexier to them um to hear local but you gotta get some answers on this i if it doesn't make you feel right i mean like i'm someone who doesn't mind if my boyfriend watches porn um i think i would mind this because it just feels like the next step of like you downloaded a weird app like or listen if i found a weird app i'd be like explain to me the hotness behind this and what turns you on about this yes not that i need to start dressing like a local or something or maybe that's something he wants and he doesn't know how to bring up to her like i think it could turn into something very positive and healthy for their relationship maybe something she doesn't know that turns him on like you just said i hope

i do understand that thing of like being scared to bring up something that you think might embarrass him too you know like you're showing him this thing that you found and he, you know, that he's going to have to either make up a lie, which is going to be embarrassing to watch or tell you the truth, which might really embarrass him and then might make like emasculate him to you of like my husband's like admitting he like jerks off to these local women.

Like, um, but the fact that he gave you his password was really cool too yeah that's why i don't think it's anything malicious and i wonder if he needs to send you an invite to this app yeah bring you in show up on this app you find this app and submit your photos show your boobs headless photos and then have and have him like that how crazy would that be to submit your own photos on the app that you know your husband's looking at and then all of a sudden you come up on it that would be amazing that would be like

the white lotus scene with the condom rapper where she just leaves it out spoiler alert like just throwing it the thing you know in his face oh i love it that's a good one um i'm sorry though this sounds really that's shitty and you know what it's nice to know i think it's thank you for sharing that because i think a lot of people deal with the stuff in their marriages and they're ashamed of like we don't have complete communication and there might be some shadiness going on um that yeah everyone just has shameful things that they even hide from their spouses and it's the best case scenario that you're just like totally open with one another and share everything but we're so we're so repressed around sex and our desires and it's

so hard to share this stuff with our partner but i heard the sadness in your voice of like i just don't know what to do and i'm really sorry you're feeling that way but i think this is very normal i think it's very resolvable just own your side of the street which just don't know what to do. And I'm really sorry you're feeling that way, but I think this is very normal. I think it's very resolvable. Just own your side of the street, which is you fucked up and went through his phone without, you know, asking, which makes sense why you didn't, I get why you did it, but just own it because then you will have carte blanche to go after him for what he's done. Once you really like repent for what you did without getting accusatory of him, like own your thing first, make sure that is tidy. Like don't even accuse him of it.

I would say, I went through your phone, babe. And I just want to say, I feel really rotten about it. I wish I wouldn't have done it. You were sleeping and I just need to be honest with you. I don't want to do it again. I don't know what, you know, here's why I was compelled to do it. But da, da, da, da.

And I hate, I hate that I did it to you. And I'm so sorry. And then eventually he'll go, and did you see anything? And you can go, I did, but we can talk about that another time. Really like own it. I think that will give you so much more in the end

and it will, you didn't do everything right. I think so often we just like, and you already know that. I hear it in your voice, but I think so often we approach fights like, they did this. It's just like, find something that you did wrong because it gives you so much more going into the part where you get to present them with what they did wrong.

There's so much less defensive if you've already kind of shown them how to own up to shit. And women usually have to be the ones to lead that because we're smarter. Not necessarily. But in these relationships, we read the books and everything like that. Please, men, don't stop listening to me because i said that i love you so much and i you know you are smarter and and we gotta keep that lie going so that you uh believe it and still like us and let us live and have reproductive rights uh not all men uh especially not steve love you guys so much thank you for listening to the podcast we will see you next week uh we're doing one episode a week till the end of the year and then we will revisit and

let you know of the new plan but i'm very excited for everything to come for the podcast. I love you guys so much. Thank you for waiting a whole week. Come see me on the road. I'm going to be in Waterloo, New York this week. I'm going to be in Hershey, Pennsylvania. I am going to be in Atlantic City. Tickets still available, NikkiGlaser.com. Plus, so many more dates just came out. Rounding up the end of the year, Oklahoma City, Tulsa, and then St. Louis, New Year's Eve. Get those tickets soon. New Year's Eve, St. Louis is selling out quickly.

And then I just released a bunch of new dates that you can check out at my Instagram. There's a whole graphic with all of them. And I would love to see you there. I love you guys so much. Thank you for your support. Thank you for listening. Have a great week and don't be cool. And jackpot! much thank you for your support thank you for listening have a great week and don't be cool catch john stewart back in action on the daily show and in your ears with the daily show ears

edition podcast from his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now plus you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You are cordially invited to... The hottest party in professional sports. I'm Tisha Allen, former golf professional and the host of Welcome to the Party, your newest obsession about the wonderful world that is women's golf.

Featuring interviews with top players on tour, tips to help improve your swing, and the craziest stories to come out of your friendly neighborhood country club. Welcome to the Party with Tisha Allen is an iHeart Women's Sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Welcome to the Party, that's P-A-R-T-E-E, on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics

surrounding dating, sex, and love. That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. With a blend of humor, vulnerability and authenticity, we share our personal journeys, navigating our 30s, tackling the complexities of modern relationships and engage in thought provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. From groundbreaking interviews with diverse guests to relatable stories that will resonate with your experiences, Decisions Decisions is going to be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get ready to reshape your understanding of relationships and embrace the freedom of authentic connections. Tune in and join the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. like I lived most of my life in a blackout. I was trapped in addiction. I had to grab the lamp and smashed it against the walls. And then I decided I wanted to tell my own story.

Listen to Crumbs on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.