The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #333 Give Them A Story!

Episode Date: April 19, 2023

After a weekend on tour together, Anya tells Nikki that she is finally not crying. Anya's anxiety list sparks a conversation about self-help stuff that doesn't really help. Nikki will sometimes talk extra loud to give people a story. Brian talks about a text he got from Nikki in the early days of their friendship and why it changed a streak of bad luck. Nikki and Anya go through some gifts they got on tour and experiences meeting Besties. They all get into a conversation about what makes good creative expression. In Nikki's Reddit Dump she preps her family for an appearance on Family Feud, Anya is reminded of a catastrophe she almost used as an excuse to text a guy and they all feel the awkwardness of starting a new job. In the Final Thought Nikki has a strong opinion on Daisy Jones and the Six. -- Watch this episode on our Youtube Channel: The Nikki Glaser Podcast Follow the pod on Instagram for bonus content: @NikkiGlaserPod Leave us your voicemail: Click Here To Record Get Pod Merch: Podshop.NikkiGlaser.com Nikki's Tour Dates: nikkiglaser.com/tour Anya's Patreon: patreon.com/anyamarina Brian Frange: brianfrange.com More Nikki: IG More Anya: IG More Brian: IG More producer Noa: IGSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Here's Nikki. Hello, here I am. Welcome to the show. It's the Nikki Glaser Podcast Here's Nikki Hello, here I am, welcome to the show It's the Nikki Glaser Podcast With me today, Noah is in Arizona Anya's in New York City Brian Frangie, our new permanent sidekick is in Los Angeles How's it going everyone? I'm not crying today What?

When did you cry? Remember Saturday on tour? I just wept for an hour. Saturday on tour, you cried? We were driving. Why am I blacking this out? Remember, I was like, I made a list of my anxieties, and I ate my teeth, and I ate my life. Oh, yeah.

That was during the drive. I was thinking Saturday, like during the show. Yeah, we drove Saturday on tour, which we're on tour right now. We're in Tucson next weekend and Vegas and then a lot of European cities. I added up 10 cities in 14 days. But this weekend, we were in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania on Friday. Great show. And then two shows in New Hampshire on Saturday night,

and we had to drive five and a half hours, which, you know, with stops, ends up being like six and a half. And in the morning, how did we even get on the subject? I mean, we were just pulling out of town, and all of a sudden, Anya, oh, because Anya couldn't sleep.

You couldn't sleep the night before. We got terrible sleep because we had to wake up so early to drive. And I was like, I just had a list of anxieties for four hours in the middle of the night. But you made a list. Do you find that helpful? Why is that helpful to make a list

for you? Because I'm guessing that's a tool you use to get out of anxiety. It was the last ditch effort because I was like, you got to stop. If you cannot sleep and none of this meditation or breathing is working, just make a list so you can get it out. Right.

And then my theory was, I bet it's like four things that I'm just recycling over and over. It wasn't. It was like 27 things. Yeah. It was so long. I was like scared I will have or get COVID and never be able to tour Europe or get married.

Do you ever think about making an appointment to worry where you write down your list and you say, I'm going to worry about these at 10, 15 a.m. tomorrow morning? That's interesting. That's really good. Because it doesn't let you off the hook of like never worrying because when you kind of put things, when you go, just don't think about it,

you're like, well, I'm going to have to get to this at some point. Like this requires, but giving yourself a total break from it knowing you will get to it I like that I wish I could do that but it feels like my obsession is too strong it's like the Hulk it's like ha ha ha you think your silly little tool will work against me I mean 27 is a lot

I can't imagine well you can't control your thoughts and everyone knows that like I hope at this point there's no free will so they're just coming in you can't really help them but there are things you can do well because I think thoughts are like a stream you can kind of like dam them up and you can direct them

in different ways and like steer them by doing devices like that but you can't help the flow all self help things is just you have all these things that you can do and then they take up all your day and then they don't help at all. But you do them. I think they do help.

And then you spend all day doing it. Because you're worried about doing them. I spend all my day stretching and breathing and I feel like shit. Oh, yeah. How much stretching do I have to do? Making my bed does not improve anything for me. It's just, I have a nice looking bed, but still my life is in shambles.

My Russian mom is always like, yeah, because it's so tight. My therapist recently, we'll get to your Russian mom. My therapist recently told me that she was like, what do you want to do when you feel anxiety? And I go, I want to curl up in a ball. Like I want to lay, I want to lay down on my stomach and like put my hands underneath my, like, I want to feel a lot, intense pressure. I want to be pressurized and like gravity blanket. Yeah. So like gravity blankets, I never liked, but I kind of do, I get it because I'm trying to do that by laying on my stomach.

That's why I lay on my stomach. I want to feel like I'm being squished. Like a vacuum bag. Yeah. Oh, I would love that. But she said, she goes, do it. You know, I think most therapists would go, don't go to your room and lay in the dark and try to fall asleep when you're feeling anxiety.

But she's like, do it. If it works, that's a soothing thing. And you used to get migraine headaches all the time and you would like yeah then i got my uti taken out yeah not your uti no actually those got put in they're too similar you're right my utis definitely got added into my vagina after the there's only room for one you thing and three lettered thing in my uh puss um at a time yeah but i used to get yeah my iud um caused me great migraines um and they it was so it was the worst thing in my life and then chris would have to take my head and put it into his vice like grip

and just push it together and he was so scared that my head was gonna it into his vice-like grip and just push it together. And he was so scared that my head was going to snap like a cantaloupe. And I go, yes, please do that. I would love for my head to, my skull to break because that would feel better and it would relieve the tension. You know, like you just want to break up the tension. Yeah, I mean, so your anxiety list, did it help? Yeah, because I went to sleep afterwards.

But I was sort of shocked. Like, fuck, dude, this is a lot to worry about. Like, this is actually real. Well, you know how they say read a book to fall asleep? Like, you wrote a book. I really did. That'll make you fall asleep pretty fast. There was this old lady who used to,

or maybe it was an old man that they did an interview on because he was 115 years old and he was still cutting hair. He was a barber. And they asked him, what's the secret to your longevity? And he said, I don't worry about anything. Yeah. They interviewed this old woman that was like 110. Remember they did that video with all the older people.

Like she was like, the secret to life is just be happy every day. Every day I'm happy. She's like, everyone in her life was dead. The secret to a long life is to just keep living for many years. Not worrying. I mean, stress is, you know, once you you look at we talked about that Dr. Sarno book, the healing back pain that completely transformed your back pain. Right, Brian? And you you talked to all pain. What? I had ball chronic pelvic pain. I had my balls for six years. Yeah. So it's all pains. And it was all in your head, right? Well, not in a not in a way that it was a condescending way to say no yes and that's why people don't like all in your head but it it shouldn't be condescending it's not it doesn't mean that you're causing it if it's in your head again your thoughts are not your fault so it's still something that people can feel sorry for you

because it's actual pain but it is not because there's a like a physical to a torsion in your groin no they checked for torsion there was no torsion right i don't even know what that means but i think it can happen down there torsion is when your testicles uh wrap around each other and start suffocating each other oh my god yeah if you put a rubber band around your finger for a long enough it'll turn blue and it'll just fall off yes all right everybody don't blue and it'll just fall off. Yes. All right, everybody. Don't do it. It'll just fall off.

It's cringy. Don't do it. I saw a tribe that cuts off. I saw a thing on Reddit and there's a tribe that cuts off men's fingers to test their strength and if they wince, they keep getting their fingers cut

until they're not wincing anymore. And there's this one guy with like he's just like they got to they were like cutting off his toes yeah

on that note you have to see the banshees of Ines Sharon no I don't think I need to see it if it's on that note

I don't want to see that happen it's just such a good metaphor you'll I'm curious what you think it's about it is such a simple story but it's like so crazy to watch can I just tell you a tiny bit you think it's about. It is such a simple story, but it's like so crazy

to watch. Can I just tell you a tiny bit of what it's about? Sure. Spoiler alert for the Banshees of Erosion that no one saw. And no one will see. It was nominated for an Oscar. It was one of the best films. So Colin Farrell is a very simple man, and he's best friends

with this guy who's like a crank, a curmudgeon. And he comes by his house every day, and they hang out every day in this tiny town where there's one bar. And one day he comes over, he's best friends with this guy who's like a crank a curmudgeon and he comes by his house every day and they hang out every day in this tiny town where there's one bar and one day he comes over he's like hey and the guy's like i don't want to hang out like he doesn't want to talk to him and colin farrell's just very simple why don't you want to talk i'm the nicest guy in town let's hang out you're my best friend he's like i'm sick of you i'm sick of what your dumb stories and i just don't i don't you. I just want to be done with this. I just want to spend my life alone.

I want to practice my violin. That's what I love doing. And I just don't want to be your friend anymore. No, no offense. And then he keeps bugging him. And then there comes a point where he's, the guy's like, if you talk to me one more time, I'm going to cut off my finger. And, and then I will leave it there but the film continues and it's

so insane to watch because you're like who's more insane this crank or Colin Farrell the guy who kind of keeps coming by yeah I like the crank I'm a crank so I I has anyone ever told you I don't want to hang out with you anymore have we ever has anyone here ever had a friend out of the blue, just kind of cut things off and with under the guise of like, I don't like you any, like, I don't. It would be pretty bold for someone to come out and straight up say, I don't want to hang out with you anymore. You can infer that, but I guess, I guess no matter what we've, we were lied to if this happened to us and it's whether or not you saw through the lie.

But most of the time a friend cuts you off, it is because they just don't like you anymore. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I've had to do it. You've had to cut people off before? Yeah. Oh, yeah.

You go straight up to them and you say, we're done? No. Well, I have had to do that before. I've had a girl that was pretty persistent i well i have had to do that before i've had a a girl that was pretty persistent afterwards and i had to ultimately say it was right around the time i quit drinking so i had a good excuse of like i just don't drink anymore that was kind of our thing great and i don't have we don't have that in common and i just need to and she would talk really loud in public spaces anytime we'd be out to to eat, I would be very embarrassed. And I tried to like whisper

to kind of like tell her what to do. And it would just, people were staring and I- And you love to shit talk. So imagine you're seeing someone in the corner, you want to shit talk about them. And she's like, that one over there? Yes, I do love good shit talk.

And I don't mind, listen, I don't mind getting a little loud when I know people are kind of entertained by eavesdropping on my conversation. I won't be super loud, but loud when I know people are kind of entertained by eavesdropping on my conversation. I won't be super loud, but I can tell when people are kind of like, this is a fun, like in an Uber, if I'm talking about something,

if I'm like gossiping about some celebrity I know dirt on, and I know this person probably knows that celebrity too, I will get louder. I did this recently on a girl's trip. We had a chef come in. And I was mouthing off about a celebrity that I know some recently on a girl's trip we had a chef come in and I was mouthing off about a celebrity that I know some dirt on

I know a lot of shit, I was shit talking literally I'll tell you later Brian and I could tell everyone was kind of like, we should and I'm like, no, let it out, I want to get this out because anyone he tells, Nikki Glaser was saying this about this person,

I can always deny it. I'll just fucking deny I said it. But also, I was reading things I found on Reddit about this person as well that backed it up. And I'd only heard this through stories. And then I saw this whole Reddit thread where it was like, no, these are stories about this person. I was like, it's substantiated a word? It's corroborated.

Yeah. I think they're both works. But yeah, I can sense when I'm being entertaining with the octave at which or the volume with which I'm speaking.

And then I can tell some people, Chris doesn't, my boyfriend doesn't love how loud I can be in public sometimes. And I can't be too loud. I grew up getting shushed a lot in restaurants and stuff because I'm just a loud person. Haven't been in a while, but I think that's more of a power thing now.

Like people are too scared to shush me. So I should probably keep it down is what I'm trying. I love that. I love giving people a story to tell. I used to do that. Yes. Walking through the streets of New York, you always walk past so many strangers. And a game I used to play was called Give Them a Story.

I didn't call it that, but it explains it pretty well. So what I'd do, I'd be by myself usually, or I'd be with a person. I don't have to be alone. And I'd be walking and I would go, I would just try to say something that they would overhear that then there'd be a story for them. Like I'd go, like I'd be on my phone and I'd go,

I told them only two meatballs or something like that yeah yeah and then go to their friend at Starbucks like this guy was like flipping out about meatballs yes you end up in a John Mulaney joke you know like John Mulaney has so many jokes where he's like eat ass sell drugs suck dick like there's always like a weird person saying something I realized this this weekend we were listening to John Mulaney in the car, which is great inspiration. Like I forget how much, how good it is for me to listen to comedians I love

because it's just their style. I absorb some of their things that I like about them. And then thus I become better by using some of the things that I already gravitate towards naturally. I'm not doing it because I'm like, people like John Mulaney, I'll do what he does it because I'm like, people like John Mulaney, I'll do what he does.

But I'm like, oh, I like the way he, you know, I've realized something. He's a fantastic writer, no question about it. I talk about him all the time. He's one of the best stand-up comics out there. We all know it. But the way that he talks and the way he'll change his, the dynamics of his voice to emphasize things is very, is a lot of what makes him so enjoyable.

And I go, well, I can do that. Like I'm just talking like a normal person. I sometimes have fun with going like, and then I'm like, but I was doing it a lot more this weekend and it was so much fun. And it really like colored in, it's like having a coloring book and you're like, oh, those are good drawings.

And then you color it in with the vocal intonations and stuff. They're tools. They're just tools in your tool belt. I mean, that's why I started smashing watermelons on stage. Well, I will say that I'm finding myself to be a little sexist here because I do hate when female comics do this mugging after a joke that I've made compilations of like I've been so bored with my life and so annoyed by some trends in comedy that I've literally made like what is it it's okay oh they'll say a punchline and then go yeah yeah

for those of you who can't see the video it's a perplexed face okay if you if you watch Succession Shiv Roy is always going huh

she's doing she's tucking her head back and then looking to the side like hmm it's that I think Amy Schumer

invented that Amy did invent it which thank you Amy like that's I love Amy inventedumer invented that. Amy did invent it. Yeah. Thank you, Amy. Like that's, I love, Amy invented a lot of things that, you know, I don't think she gets credit for. And I think that she gets thrown under the bus now because she, you know, people just get tired of seeing someone too much. And then they have to, that's what happens. Like, that's why I don't want to be too famous is because they'll turn on you eventually.

But she was, yeah, she was, you were friends with Amy, right, Brian? Yeah, I did her website for seven years. That's right. When did you get the call that she's like, we need to upgrade? I'm tired of running my website through GoDaddy. She's so loyal. Like there was no indication that she was ever going to drop me. And then when Train train wreck came out oh i had to call her and say i can't do your website anymore i'm just a guy but you need a company to do this and then she was like that makes sense and then that was it oh wow yeah i got out of there yeah uh she um but yeah she she definitely does She would do the thing where she goes, yeah. And then she kind of does like an um afterwards. Like there is that.

There are other female comics that do it too. I do like, there are definitely Amy mannerisms I've picked up. There's just anyone I watch, I'll pick up something that they do. And you could accuse me of stealing or whatever, but it's not conscious but this mugging thing is taking up 25% of these comics act and I don't see men doing it I could see John

going what huh huh like at least he doesn't overuse it though I don't feel but maybe I'm being sexist here and I'm just like more jealous of women and I compare myself more to them I have a man one you have a man one please tell us yeah cause I do it all the time cause I love here and I'm just like more jealous of women. And I compare myself more to them. I have a man one. You have a man one? Please tell us.

Yeah, because I do it all the time because I love it. And I think this is from. I started doing the mugging too and it works. And I'm like, I'm disgusted why this works. Because the audience does love like a close-up of like a confused woman. Okay, what works? Well, my favorite comic is probably Norm MacDonald. And he's probably the one who I got this from.

And I think a lot of comics where you just lean into a punchline and you go and you say and that's my punchline. Yes. That's my punchline. You do talk like that.

That works. That works. It totally works. I don't I don't think it works. It gives it a little boost but you gotta be willing

it's gotta be funny already, and you can't rely on it too much. So I don't fault you for throwing that in. That's what my whole set is. I just do this over and over again. No, you have actually funny jokes. But yes, I've been watching a lot of Norm recently. Did you see his SNL monologue when he hosted SNL a year and a half after being fired?

No. I guess more probably. You have to watch it again. It was on Reddit. I saw it the other day. He pretty much says, they fired me from the show. And he goes, it's been a year and a half. He goes, they fired me because I'm not funny.

What happened the past year and a half? And now I'm funny. He was like, you know, he goes, nothing's changed. I haven't gotten funnier. The only thing that's happened is this show has gotten less funny. This show sucks. So now, and he pretty much is like, and then instead of saying at the end, he goes, you know how they always go. It's going to be a great show.

He goes, it's going to be a terrible show tonight. We've got Snoop Dogg. It was so good. But you can hear the writers booing. I watched it because it said, listen to Norm Macdonald's SNL monologue and the writers are booing because he pretty much says it's a terrible show. It's the only thing that could have happened,

but he gets to it in a way that you can't deny. It's like he hasn't changed in a year and a half. Why is this guy that was fired for not being funny suddenly let back on? The only logical answer is, is that the bar has been lowered. It's so good. And you can't hate him for it because he's just so damn lovable.

All right, we've got a lot of show ahead of us. We're here with Brian, Noah, and Anya. We'll be back right after this. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now.

Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. We're back. I gotta say this weekend, met a lot of besties and haven't had this kind of response to something new on the podcast in a while, but people are on board with Brian Frangie. They're excited. I got

a lot of side comments of just like I'm a bestie, we hug and everything, and then while we're taking a picture, they're just like I really love lot of side comments. I'm just like, I'm a bestie. We hug and everything. And then while we're taking a picture, they're just like, I really love Ryan. You know, like through their smile. Ryan's the heart of the show. So they are fucking on board, dude. And I'm not lying.

It was at least two to, I would say three people probably. Maybe two that I'm bumping up. That's how many people I Venmo'd to do that. Well, it was good. It was well spent because it made me feel like, oh, okay, I made the right choice. I'm taking all the credit for people liking you. No, it was an easy choice to make

because yeah, we, I was just thinking about you doing your little game of like, give them a story or whatever that game was called on the street in New York. I think our friendship re-upped because I ran into you on 8th Avenue after I was either on my way to get fro-yo during my fro-yo addiction of 2012.

I'm going to say 14. Yeah, it was many years. It is so fascinating that you remember that. I was going to 13 handles. 12 handles? 13 handles. You're talking about in New York like 10 years ago. many years. It is so fascinating that you remember that. I was going to 13 Handles. 12 Handles? 13 Handles. Yeah. You're talking about in New York like 10 years ago.

16 Handles. Thank you. 10 years ago in New York on the street, we were on 8th Avenue. You were walking south. I was maybe walking north. Yeah. I was living with Anya.

So I was like, you know, headed back to my apartment, I'm guessing, because I was coming up from 17th Street. I was walking back from UCB. So UCB was at 26th Street. So you were walking downtown. I was coming up from 17th Street. I was walking back from UCB. So UCB was at 26th Street. So you were walking downtown.

I was walking up. And then you were with a girl that you were dating at the time. Oh, my God. Yeah. Oh, my God. Now I remember this. How do you not remember? Now I'm questioning my choice.

No, I ran into you twice then. Because there was one time I was leaving UCB. And it was on like 26th Street. And I was like, oh, my God. It was right there at UCB. Yes, yes. And I think we discussed the fact that we ran into each other previously and you asked

me about this girl. Oh, that's it. And then we walked for a little bit together, no? Yeah, I think so. I think so too. And that was before I even got the show Not Safe which then I hired Brian. My boyfriend and I hired Brian. Um, my boyfriend and I hired Brian.

I told my boyfriend about Brian. I was like, I think we got a guy to do our digital stuff. He's run Amy Schumer's website until she was doing train wreck because, and then he quit out of just like, you know, realizing his limitations. And so Chris had one call with you and was like, I love this guy.

And he's not someone who I, I often have to be kind of careful about. Like, you're going to love this person. He's kind of like, let me decide. You know what I mean? Like, he doesn't want to be told who he's going to like, which I totally get. Because I will say that when Chris Convey and I first met, the night before we met, my friend who hired Chris and who also was my showrunner was like,

you're really going to like this Chris guy. I think there's going to be a thing with you too. And I was like, don't you tell me who I'm going to like. I don't like a setup. I don't like expectations. I don't like anyone like kind of watching me meet someone and being like, are they going to hit it off?

And so I at first was very reluctant to give him a chance because I didn't want Kim Gamble to win and to be like, I told you so and take credit for my crush. And then cut to two months later crying in her office. I love him. He doesn't talk to me. She's like, you don't talk to him. Okay. So Brian, then you flew out to LA and you, did you move to LA? That was a great text.

I was, well, I also remember when I first started talking to Chris on the phone, he called me and I was in the supermarket buying bread and meats for a barbecue. And I was talking to him while I was like, listen, this is like, you know, in my perspective, this is not Chris Convey. This is a potential boss calling you to interview you. And so I had to pick up. I picked up and I was like, hello, I'd love to talk, but I'm buying bread and meats and I'm about to go to a barbecue. I know he loved this.

He's like, okay. I was like, should I keep you on the phone or should I call you back? And he said, keep me on the phone. And there was the friendship that was set in stone. Like, yeah, he probably loved your honesty and he likes a little, he likes a trip to the store. Yeah, a good trip to the store. Through the phone. Anyone who pluralizes meats,

you got to be friends with. Well, it was multiple meats. But the text I got from you was one of the best texts of my life. What did it say? I remember this. I was also walking to the store. Like God.

I was walking to whole foods on uh oh my god i have to say something about arowan i i'm sure you have lots of opinions about arowan oh yeah we've talked about arowan yeah okay but but first the text i i was walking to whole foods and i just got a text and it said it was from you and that'd be weird if it wasn't it said Brian uh would you be willing to amber alert it was an amber alert and I said I gotta get out of town it was from you and it said Brian would you be willing to move to LA for a job and I was like of course I would are you kidding me I also just had a recent series of calamities that made me really want to get out of New York. The calamities!

What were those calamities? Do you have your list of calamities? It didn't work out with the girl on 8th Avenue. Yeah, that girl. We did break up and I had to move back. I didn't have to. I preferred to move back to Long Island and live with my dad.

Too much. Yeah, it's well, first thing, it's too long of a story, but the first thing that happened was I was going out for a job. I was very far along in the process of being a writer for The Daily Show. And then one of my arch nemesises,

it was between me and another person. And this is also a blind packet submission. So I got really far in the process. And they told me in the interview, it was down to you and one other person. And then I didn't get it. My arch nemesis did. And that was...

Oh my God, I'm dying to know who this arch nemesis was. I will. Are they still around? Are they still kicking around? No, they had a fall from grace that was greater than Hitler. And I was devastated. And and then long story short i uh was robbed i got into a car accident i broke my wrist um all in like the same day and uh then you texted me wait a day but it's a very long story you robbed car accident broke wrist were

any of those connected well um i was playing football in brooklyn i had a zog sports football team and uh we were playing i almost joined one for soccer once yeah yeah it's just like a meetup group kind of thing for sports and now zog is an anti-Semitic slur. Oh, geez. Is it Zog? Yeah. Anyway, I was playing football. Check your list.

Is it Zog? Is that one of the anxiety things on your list now? No. Zog? I had my car parked. It was Halloween weekend. I had slept over at my friend's house who had a Halloween party. So I had a bunch of shit in my car. I had a laptop in my car parked and it was Halloween weekend. I had slept over at my friend's house who had a Halloween party. And so I had a bunch of shit in my car. I had a laptop in my car, a phone in my car.

And I had to park the car out in front of the football field because I had nowhere else to put it. And while I was playing football, someone threw a brick through my car window, shattering it. And they stole $5,000 worth of stuff which is a great which is grand larceny and i uh when we got back to the car i called the police and like it's it's so fast as opposed to larceny they're like this is grand they said that's yeah they said that that is interesting okay grand larceny yeah um which what does that mean to you that just means that if you catch the criminal that's a bigger offense but bigger offense because they stole over five thousand dollars it just you get to brag that you were grand yeah it's a better

crime to brag about it yes yes okay so you broke your wrist while playing well so i didn't even know my wrist hurt a little bit but they they broke into the car i called the police and um the police like do not give a shit about robbery they will not come out they don't care but i told them i had a tracking device on my phone that on my phone and so i used my friend's phone i had find my iphone and i said i know where they are i I literally have their location. The person who robbed me, I have their location. And then they said, okay, okay, fine. And they, uh, they took me into the squad car and they drove me away. And while they drove me away, my friends were sitting with my car with the broken window. And I had placed my, my gym bag with my iPod mini and my clothes,

uh, next to the car. And we drove off in pursuit of this criminal and we got to his literal apartment building. We knew the apartment building he was in and the police were like, there are known perps in that building. And so I was like, well, this probably is a perp. And so we went in there, they knocked on one person's door

and they said, did someone just come in here with a bag and they said no and then the police were like well that's it we can't do anything more for you and i'm like he's literally in this fucking building with five thousand dollars worth of stuff so they said we can't help you they drive me back to my jeep while i not my jeep my car. While I was gone. Well, now it's a Jeep. It's an open air Jeep. It's open air. Now it's a Jeep. While I was gone, a totally separate person came and stole my gym bag. Why did you leave your gym bag in your car?

I left it with my two friends next to the car. And I said, I got to go with the cops. I was frantic. Yeah, you're in distress. It was on the friends next to the car. And I said, I got to go with the cops. I was frantic. Yeah, you're in distress. It was on the ground next to the car. Oh my God. Okay, well, they... That's another thing.

They went and they sat in the car to wait and they didn't realize the gym bag is out there. Some guy pulled up and just stole the gym bag. It's like I robbed twice in the same fucking day. And broke your wrist and not knowing. And then... I'm guessing your wrist pain might have been psychological if we're getting back to that.

My wrist was hurting, and then I was like, you know what? My wrist hurts a lot. And so the next day or a couple days later, I have my dad drive me to the doctor. They do an x-ray of my wrist. My wrist is broken. I dove for an interception and landed From what? I dove for an interception

and landed. Yeah, I dove for an interception. I didn't intercept it. Nothing good happened. Were you trying to make friends at this? Like you do a lot of things to make friends.

Were you trying to make friends with Zog Sports? Back in the, back in my, Not judging it. Back then, I was not trying to make friends. You were just trying

to have some fun. I had a couple of friends. I had two friends. Brian was telling me about a time in his a couple of friends i had two friends uh brian was telling me about a time in his life in la where he had no friends well yeah like just you to laugh this was like no because i had left town like me chris and tim had all moved away and he had no friends and he was just going to like lantern lightings. I was just so desperate for friends. Like in Echo Park,

like there's like Chinese lantern lightings. I tried so much. Well, it's adorable. Well, just to finish the story. Yeah, okay, sorry, sorry. So they said, we got to send you for an x-ray. I had my car back,

although the window was broken. I did that thing that, you know, poor people do when they duct tape a piece of plastic over the window. While I'm driving to get my wrist x-rayed, somebody rear-ends

me. Somebody rear-ends me. This is all within a couple days. This is all within less than a week from each other. Someone rear-ends me, and then it's one of those guys who rear-ends you and then immediately gets out of the car and is like, what the hell's happening?

He gets out of the car. Wait, he's mad at you? Yeah, because his foot went off the brake. Oh, God. It was on sunrise highway. He knows you don't have insurance. You've got a fucking trash bag in your window. He gets out of the car.

You've got a broken wrist. You're like, ah. I'm one of those people who is in despair. And he gets out of the car and he goes this is my mom's car you gotta help me out can we not call the police he starts doing that thing where he rubs the spot on the car that he hit

it's okay and I was like you know what it's fine I just let it go I get to the doctor and I realize that I really did That's nice of you I just let it go I get to the Doctor And I realize that I really did get injured In that car accident

I have like My back hurts Whiplash But it didn't last very long So it was totally fine That guy was fine And then you get a text from me How much sooner after?

Like Four or five days Oh that's great That's amazing Four or five days later I was a little premature On asking you if you'd move. You should tell people why that text is important. Why is it important?

What do you mean? Why is that text important to you, Brian? Oh, well, it was my first job. It was my first ever job in the industry. I didn't work for anybody before that.

I got, I got close to the daily show. I didn't get it. And then other than that, I was just a piece of shit. No, I was just a piece of shit. No, you were a piece of shit. That's why he gets the job.

To give him the job, not only because he's talented, but because he's a nice person. I think that's what talent can take you so far. I don't know. I wouldn't have hired someone who I thought was more talented than Brian if they were more of an ass he's just a good guy

so had you guys done any work together? or were you just friendly? what did you do? had you done anything for me website wise? I was the host for you multiple times at the comedy attic right okay I think it was your first

if I'm not mistaken is that where your first headlining gig was? Yeah, it was. I hosted your first ever headlining gig, so I'm sure you had a special memory of like, oh, well, you were the first person that ever hosted. Yeah, you were so nice, and we hung out there backstage and stuff. Yeah, you were just a... Yeah, you were so...

And I think it was this show that we were doing because it was like Chris and I, and then we had, um, we were just trying to fill it with our friends, you know, like that's, you have these opportunities.

You just want to give. And, you know, I remember hearing that story of your life and being like, oh, this is so exciting to give someone who's so down and out. Yeah. Like a,

a cool thing that other, aside from someone who's not going to appreciate it like you just want people to appreciate things well you're a giver so then you moved to LA you've given me a lot of things and then you abandoned me at my time of deepest sorrow these events where did you find

events to go to to make friends because I think we have a lot of listeners who you know and even me I've moved to new towns and and sometimes you just don't have friends how do you make friends yeah i mean when you're alone in a new town it's it's sheer desperation which is looking back on it now i was like so stupid all i had to do was just go to open mics you know go to the improv and i would have made i would have made some friends but it was just so disheartening for me to start over on the open mic scene after doing

new york for 10 years if you could have you would have yeah there's no way you were gonna do that it just wasn't the right thing for you at the time it would have been demoralizing in a different way than going to a lantern lighting yes so i went on different apps there's like there was a bunch of different apps there was meetup groups and i would just look at like the events of the city and be like maybe i'll meet someone literally i went to like a chinese lantern lighting thing and i go there and i'm like i wonder if i'll talk to anybody while i'm here and i'm just looking at like oh brian beautiful lanterns one friend who did it can you say that can you say was there one person my rat friend i wasn't. I wasn't going to say it, but... I had my rat friend.

That's what he said to me the other day at breakfast. He was like, and I had one rat friend. And I go, what are you talking about? Was he an actual rat? No, no, no, no. Well, that would be better, actually. I mean, he liked those animals. A figurative rat.

He's not really a rat. I just like calling him a rat friend because he was very close. But you didn't like each other is what my point was. No, we didn't like each other. You didn't enjoy each other. It was out of necessity to hang out. A friendship of convenience. Did he have a rat? Am I remembering that wrong? Did he have a pet rat or something? No. No, no.

He just was a little weaselly. You would actively not want to hang out with this person, but then you he just was a little weaselly and so maybe he's more of a weasel you would like not actively not want to hang out with this person but then you just would because you had nothing else well when you're so lonely you have no options I mean it's either that

and then I joined a dodgeball league and I would just go nobody at the dodgeball league wanted to be friends with me because I wasn't dedicated enough to the craft of hucking the balls. And I got pelted like crazy. I hurt my arm. People would hit me in the face.

They'd laugh at me. They'd point. They'd go. Because people in LA, they are obsessed with dodgeball. It's like pickleball now in Florida. It's, yeah, no, they are intense. They can throw the ball like 50 miles an hour. And I would just get the crap eaten out of me,

and then we'd go get drinks after. I really admire you for just going to these things solo. It takes a lot of... It's hard to make friends in adulthood. Bravery to just go to stuff alone. I'm trying to think of stuff I've gone to alone. I know I've done it before. I'm not... The Taylor Swift parties?

Oh, yeah. Taylor Swift stuff. Even the Taylor Swift concert. I mean, I was meeting a bestie there. And I'm going alone, actually, this Saturday in Houston. I'm going 100% alone. But I guess that's a similar thing, even though I'm going to be entertained the whole time. So I don't really have to talk to anyone.

So it's like that fear of, oh, no one's going to talk to me. I think that's going to be great for you. I think you're going to have a cathartic experience that would be much greater than if you're with someone else. You could do it with, you could have no qualms about going nuts. Yeah, that's true. I do. I wonder how it'll be. And then the next night I go with my mom and we're front row. And so that's going to be extremely special. And so I'm very excited about this weekend. And we're also, I'm flying to LA tomorrow.

I'm filming a couple game shows, including Family Feud. Oh my God. And my family is all coming out. And today we're going to a fitting because no one knows what to wear. And of course, I got a stylist for myself and asked them, do you want a stylist? No, no, no. And then two days before it's happening, they're like, I don't know what to wear, Nikki.

Like this isn't fair. I mean, it wasn't exactly like that, but it's like, there's panic mode now. And so I go, okay. And so we're all going to a fitting later today. Are you allowed to say which family? Which family? Which family? My family.

I know, but is everyone like Lauren and Matt? Oh, yeah. So my mom, my dad, and Lauren and Matt are all going to be on it. Is this Steve Harvey? I just saw Burt Crusher post a picture of his family at the taping. So I'm like, yeah, then I'm allowed to say that I'm going to tape this. Yeah, Steve Harvey. Steve Harvey, yeah.

And then we're playing against another family. And I won't say who that is, but it's a famous guy from a band where their tongues are out all the time. Okay. So that'll be maybe cool. So you don't know that a lot of bands do that. Yeah, Kiss?

Yeah, and I bet the killers one time were like, but yeah, so Anya, back to your anxieties. You went through this list and then I made Matt say all of his anxieties and that I said all of mine and I do feel like we got somewhere through it and then we played a question game where I was just asking questions about I just pulled up like deep questions to get to know each other and we just all were answering questions about like what

was so fun it was so fun and anya was like how did you even come up with that i'm like i just go just google questions if you're ever bored and you want to get to know people because people don't like to talk about real stuff but if you're prompted with a question you kind of get into some some real stuff we learned i was wondering if you were asking the 33 33 questions that the new york times was asking or saying will help you fall in love right um no I was kind of looking for that at first but I forgot the number I knew it was like a specific number of questions so um yeah there's 33 questions I guess that you should ask your partner and then you

stare deeply into each other's eyes for like four uninterrupted minutes and then you're supposed to definitely fall in love with them but did you learn anything about matt or about yourself during that question game yeah i definitely i was like shocked multiple times with the stuff he was telling you but as always i black out and i can't remember what it was now that you asked me i know we were i mean it was a long day and then we had two shows that night and i will say i was gifted by one of our besties with the Taylor Swift Midnight's album that has a signed picture of her inside of it. It's my favorite. Wait, that's not it. It's my favorite picture of her.

I know. This Midnight stuff has done the best of any of her art stuff. But it's a picture of her on the couch that I'm obsessed with. And she signed it. I'm going to smell it. But it was this really nice fan. art stuff but it's a picture of her on the couch that i'm obsessed with and she signed it i'm gonna smell it and um but it was this really nice fan i forget his name right now but i've tagged him on the photos on instagram that i put this up on but he um he and his i guess i think his boyfriend maybe his friend came up and were like and i saw them holding this midnight's album and they go do

you have and i go no and they go taylor swift's autograph and And they go, do you have? And I go, no. And they go, Taylor Swift's autograph. And my answer is, yes, I do have Taylor Swift's autograph. But I said, no. And they go, and they thought I was saying no to her autograph. But I meant like, I don't have this album. So I said, no, I don't. And they go, well, now you do. And so I just want to say to that fan, I did lie to you unintentionally. I do have her autograph, but I don't have this album. And I certainly don't have her autograph this big big and I don't have it on my favorite picture of her ever. All I have it on is a bunch of folklore CDs. Um, and those are kind of a dime a dozen cause she did so many of them, even though I'm grateful for everyone who's given me one of those, but this is a very special gift.

And I was also given a friendship bracelet. Um, that said good girl on it because of the good girl tour. I was given a collage with a really nice message on the good girl tour. I was given a collage with a really nice message on the back. I was given a card. It was such nice gifts. One slightly better than the rest, but you know, I appreciate any little trinket,

any little card, any thing. This is amazing. We are so freaking nice. They were so nice. I met them, those guys. Yeah, they were so cute. There were so many cute people that came

to the merch booth too. They were asking me how to get out of their own way and become better songwriters and how to succeed in music. I was just like, I think you just have to write songs that you love to hear and then you just have to be a nice person and get out in the world and like make relationships like you guys were talking about.

It's so underrated to just like pick up the phone when you're buying meats and be nice to someone that you've been nice like hang out hung out with in the past and like say yes to those. Well, I like that thing of writing songs that you want to hear or that some i read somewhere that some art is best when you think about what is not in the world that i want to consume what what is something i need right now that hasn't been done how can i make that that's a great place to start no matter what you're you're doing and i i listen to um you know who Rick Ross is? Oh, hell yeah. Rick Rubin?

Not Rick Ross, sorry. But yes, Rick Ross is also a music producer. But Rick Rubin. I always get them confused. I wonder why. And Rick Rubin, a legendary music producer. But he's kind of,

he doesn't, you know, all these videos are going around, like viral videos of him saying like i don't play a musical instrument i don't know how to work a soundboard i just know i have i have taste and artists trust me based on my taste of what i like and what i don't like and he's not even a snob about his taste i kind of felt bad after listening to this interview with him because she was asking about like does he have better taste than other people? He's like, no, I don't have better that you can't, you can't be, you can't say that a Rihanna album is better than a Beyonce album.

You can't compare the two. Rihanna is making a Rihanna album and Beyonce is making a Beyonce album. Is Beyonce making a better Rihanna album than Rihanna could make? No, she's making a better, it's apples to oranges. The idea of any album being better than another one is ridiculous because that artist couldn't have made that Rihanna album because they're not Rihanna so it's not even there you wouldn't want them to make a Rihanna album because it wouldn't sound like them and um like that I I liked it too and I'm not completely paraphrasing it right so the the podcast is called honestly with Barry Weiss w W-E-I-S-S, Barry, B-A-R-I, if you want to listen to the Rick Rubin, because it's all about creativity. It was

just the way he speaks is so soothing too. I mean, he has a great voice and he's just chill. And I like the way he like looks at creativity as something that you you can tap into and he said you know the best way to tap into it is to clear the thoughts and the best way to clear your thoughts is meditation like get closer to your real self and it goes back to it harkens back to the thing i was talking about um i i probably talked about before on the podcast because i talk about it all the time because i'm learning it my voice lessons is like i'm he's always like you're trying to sound like Taylor Swift and I can't help it like I've just I've only heard Taylor Swift sing these songs that I'm trying to sing I don't know another way to sing them it doesn't even make sense for me to sing them in a different way I

don't know I'm just following what I know and he's like well that's what it would be good for you to cover a song that you've never heard before which which I wouldn't want to do that, though, because I don't want to cover songs because I like the song already, right? So it's really hard to figure out how to sing it best for me, and then that's going to be the best, not to sound exactly like Taylor Swift. And I think I've always known that, you know, like mimicking an artist is not going to be the right way to go. But I never, I guess, let it in that I could be the only way to get close to good as Taylor Swift is not to ever sound like her.

It's to sound like the best version of me, which might be a completely different voice, completely different skill set, but whatever gets my soul to come out, whether it's like garbled and like sounds terrible, sounds like, you know, a lawnmower going over some rocks. Like if that's what's truly my soul and conveys the meaning behind the feeling that I'm trying to give you and you get that feeling from the song,

then I've done the job. So like your voice is just a tool to get the feeling through it doesn't matter if it sounds pitch perfect or not because we can all think of because she was talking she goes what's the difference between a wedding singer who has the great greatest trained vote like musically trained voice like knows all how to do every kind of sound and the difference between someone who, and Adele. And he's like, well, Adele is able to, and sure there are wedding singers that are able to do this, but Adele is able to convey a feeling through her voice. And let's not even talk about Adele. Let's talk about anyone who you really like that doesn't have the

greatest voice, um, perfection wise. Um, and you like them them you don't know why it's because they are able through their shitty voice to give you the feeling that this song is meant to convey oh yeah better than someone who could do it in a really perfect way and it allows when you hear that it allows you to like okay well then let me like loosen up these rules i have for myself to sound perfect because that's actually impeding the message I want to convey. Yeah. And I think it's like Bob Dylan. I mean, Bob Dylan sounds like, you know, he's like screeching through a vent and no one makes me. It sounds like it's always AM radio. Yeah. But he's amazing. He makes you emote. I was listening to a band over the weekend on the radio and i was like what is this

ugh like it's it was this i'm not gonna say who they are but they're very big right now maybe you won't know them but i mentioned them to matt and he was like these guys were like in the top 10 of um americana music or something i'll find out. I forgot. But anyway, I was like, is this from 1935? Like her voice was like, and I was just like hating it. But I listened to the whole song and then I was like, I get it. She's really conveying a feeling. I don't want to listen to this voice necessarily, but I'm getting the story. Yes, you got the feeling.

You don't need that feeling in your life. I think we're drawn to things because we either, that feeling resonates with us or we're void of that feeling and we need to feel it. And so you just weren't, you weren't in the mood for that.

There are some people's voices, yeah, that really aren't for me. And maybe that's because they're not doing a good job of achieving, delivering the feeling. Or maybe it's's a formula maybe what Anya was sensing is that because this song is in the top 10 or whatever it's just following a formula and it goes against what Anya was saying previously about staying true to her own voice what Rick Rubin was saying what

what Nikki you have said about your own comedy performance and being authentic on stage. It's like when you're not, and with what you were saying, Nikki, like that is creativity when you can just be so authentic and not care about outside influence and you put that out into the world and people receive it. Not giving people what you think they want because you can't possibly predict.

You think you can because you see what goes well on TikTok. You see what you admire people that you like and you go, oh, if I do that. I think that's why the mannerisms that are poisoning female stand-up comedy of this kind of like these faces of like, what? These little mugs after the joke. Those bug me not because they don't work or because they're not funny. They seem insincere to me. If we come back to anything that bugs me

about standup comedy, it's insincerity. And I think it's just performative. And I don't like it because it's something that you had planned to do, which is not a problem. We all plan our sets, but it comes from a place of,

I'm going to do this thing because I've seen it work for other people. And that's what I don't like. And it's not from a place of i'm gonna do this thing because i've seen it work for other people and that's what i don't like and it's not that i don't like that they do it i don't like when i do it and i'm projecting onto them so please don't write these people and say i'm talking shit about you because you'll be able to start seeing this in every female comic you won't stop including myself it's it you won't stop seeing it's it's it's everywhere these mugs after that they land their joke. Then they go.

Well, here's why I don't like them. They look to the sides. Like when Amy does it or did it or continues to do it or whatever. It was coming from her. It's funny, but it's not the punchline. And with a lot of these jokes, I've seen the things you're talking about. That's the punchline.

So they're like, set up, set up, set up. This guy said this crazy thing to me. And then this mug. And then it's like big laugh. And then they move on to the next joke. Whereas Amy would be like, mug? Hmm. Okay.

And then she goes on to deliver the punchline or make it funnier. You know, Amy's was a space for the audience to laugh where she didn't have to talk. It was giving her something to do for the laugh to come out, but still giving them something. So as they're laughing, she's making the face and you're right on you i think that although a lot of these girls do have great punch lines and they are good comics that's why it makes me mad i'm like you don't need this shit you're you're adding these like tags and i do stuff all the time that is so annoying in stand-up and stuff that i've done that i could roll my eyes at so these are probably younger comics so i should be nicer but yes i'm just calling out things that I've done that I could roll my eyes at. So these are probably younger comics, so I should be nicer.

But I'm just calling out things that I'm noticing that annoy me. And I'm saying that I've done them before. Please don't come after these girls. Don't say Nikki Glaser's talking shit about you. I'm just calling out a thing I'm noticing. I've done it before, too. We all make mistakes as artists. It is inherently not funny itself.

And I get doing it if you're doing crowd work. If someone says what their job is, and it's something weird, and you need a beat to think about what you're going to say next. Because when you need crowd work, you need a little bit of thinking space, generally. A couple seconds. A mug to the left and the right buys you that. But if your actual act is that you should have a plan already for what to do and you can use it once or twice i don't mind it but

with every joke i mean i saw a clip recently and i counted 10 times that this little face was made and it's just for sure and maybe it's also a trend and that's annoying to me when when when you see the trend throughout like in music when everybody's was for a while they're doing um what is that called i forgot the term for it i'll be home for christmas like baby voice like weird baby voice but like not enunciating like christmas oh yeah and then it stopped like it's not as pervasive and then i was listening to like an older taylor swift song from maybe like seven eight years ago and she was doing a lot of this like cool

melodic thing maybe it wasn't taylor but a lot of songs at the time seven eight years ago were doing like tons of like arpeggiated melodies um i'll think of examples and bring them in, but that doesn't happen as much anymore. So there are all these weird trends. Dramaturgically, it didn't work for you.

Wait, what's the word that just came out? Dramaturgically. Dramaturgically, it didn't work for you. Okay, well,

we will talk about more after this and we're going to do Reddit Dump, I think, our first time doing that with Brian and so stay here.

We'll be right back. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors.

And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right. So let's get to Reddit dump before I forget. While you're looking up that Reddit dump, one thing that men do in songs is they go, oh, oh, oh, like that. Oh, yes.

That was the thing I was thinking of. I hate that. Oh, oh, oh, oh, like that. I'm sick of that. I want it to be gone. I want it to be gone. Oh, there's oh, oh. Like that. I'm sick of that. I want it to be gone. I want it to be gone. Oh, there's also a trend where in pop songs, there was this,

it sounds like a group of guys in an alley going, hey, hey. Oh, yeah. Yeah. What the fuck is that? That's even in a recent Taylor Swift song. And I like that she used it because she's kind of like,

I feel like she has to know that that's being overused, but she was like, let's throw it in anyway. But yeah, if you start listening, there also is a YouTube video where I learned about that, where it's like if you listen to every pop song from like 2015 on, you hear, hey, hey, hey, hey. It just sounds like a group of guys walking down the street going, hey, hey. Like in lockstep going like, hey, hey, hey. Sounds like Nazis to me.

It really, yeah, it's not great. Okay, Reddit Dom. Man chanting makes me sick yeah this is your reddit all right so this one is actually um apropos because i'm about to go do family feud with my fam and we are trying to prepare for it and i've been playing family feud on my phone and i've been playing it with my parents we're not good at it. But the key to being good at Family Feud is not being good at the game. The show is a comedy show. So it's being funny, saying funny answers, giving things for Steve Harvey to do the new female comic thing, which is look to the left, look to the right, look baffled. Like that is Steve Harvey's like, you know, number one move. And the funniest thing is when he's reacting to crazy answers.

And this was one that I sent to my whole family to say, this is what I want out of you is this kind of random shit. So this is in like the, I don't know, the final round, you know, where they have to like, you know, answer very quickly. And this is what this guy said. Noah, hit it. Name something a burglar would not want to see when he breaks into a house. Naked grandma. Huh? What? This guy said, Noah, hit it. Name something a burglar would not want to see when he breaks into a house. Naked grandma. Huh?

What? Naked grandma. And it was the second answer. It was just like, naked. What did it say? Did it really say naked grandma? No, yeah, his face is. Yeah, naked occupant. They really stretched it for that one. They give you naked grandma as occupant. No, yeah, his face is. Yeah, naked occupant. They really stretched it for that one.

They give you naked grandma as occupant. Yeah, yeah. Just naked grandma. And I said Matt, because Matt is the one in our family that can probably say the weirdest thing. My mom actually is going to do the lightning round or whatever it is,

because they tell you like, who do you want to do that for your family? It's going to be amazing. So it's going to be hilarious. But that is the example i gave like i need you guys to be this random and this weird and this um irreverent okay um let me look at a fun word one okay um oh this one i wanted to bring up because it was uh we've talked about it on the podcast recently okay this is dating underscore advice is the subreddit is

it too much to bake the guy's favorite dessert for the second date i just had a very nice first date yesterday and we already at and he already asked me if i was free to go out on for dinner on saturday this girl is 29 he's 31 he was really nice and sweet and a sweet guy and he also insisted on paying for our drinks even though i kept offering as well mistake then when he saw it was raining to keep offering just offer once and then stop it um uh then when he saw it was raining he offered to walk to his place that was closed uh he offered to walk to his place that was closed we grabbed an umbrella and he walked me home i am the kind of person that loves giving and my main love languages are acts of service and gifting that doesn't mean that's wait you can't say what your love language is

the thing you like to do and i and i do want to also show that i appreciate him so i was thinking of baking him his favorite dessert and this girl's from canada because it's favorite dessert to give it to him on saturday i'm a bit scared however and unsure as I don't want to come off as too much. Any opinions? Thank you. And then, let me just say that I'm scrolling down to read the comments to be like, surely they told this woman, do not do this. Disaster.

Bad idea. You had a good date. No gifts for the guy. You can't show him that you love him at all yet don't literally i was just texting with spade this morning because we had to do this las vegas interview and we were both on ktla and it was really funny but we were talking about um girls when they're like he's like he was talking about girls saying like not getting back to him and being and just one girl wrote back like he's like hey you want to go to dinner

tonight and she just wrote coachella and like we're talking about and he has a joke that says and by the way Spade and I are going to be in Vegas um next Saturday at the Venetian um but he said that he has a bit that I've heard before but I want him to do it again about how girls will say they're bad at texting and then he gets around them and they're like like the whole time they're like I'm bad at texting sorry they'll get back to you and I was telling him about a friend i had who convinced herself that this guy was in a train accident and that maybe she needed to like this is me i know i didn't want to call you out you can say it's me i love it so anya went on a date with a guy it went well he was famous from him we're not gonna say who yeah which makes it more embarrassing oh my god it's kind of like frangie's thing of like

getting that the guy who got the job at the daily show, this person was really killing it at the time. They've had quite a, quite a fall from grace since then. Still killing it. Cause there's cancel culture is not real. A movie that ended up getting nominated for an Oscar, I think for something.

So Anya has a polite kiss on the cheek with this guy, like after the date, then he heads off. She goes back down to the subway. They don't really hear hear from each other i think you probably sent him an email afterwards just saying like this is before getting to i do the book that changed everything for all of us um and so then a few days later there was like an amtrak derailment like i don't know in connecticut or something and she had heard he was going to Connecticut like that weekend. He was filming there. Yeah, he was filming there. And so she goes, I think I want to reach out to see

like if he's okay. And I'm like, first of all, what are you going to do if he's like pinned underneath the beverage cart? What are you going to do? First of all, thank God Adia reached out this girl I went on a date with five days ago. And then also,

Nikki goes, babe, you'll hear about it on the news especially if he's famous if he died in a train accident yes he is the type of famous that yes he would absolutely be it would be like oh my god this guy was killed i just couldn't face that he was never gonna text me me again. Yes. So anyway, anyway, everyone in this comment section is like, dude, if a girl bakes me my favorite dessert on the second date, she's going to be my girlfriend after that because she's clearly the one for me.

These fucking sad losers. We're just imagining this girlfriend. It's sorry to call them sad losers. I don't mean that. I just mean these guys don't know how they work psychologically. You are not, or you're maybe uh the the female energy which is not me calling you a simp or a loser it's me saying like you don't

want a mess you want a masculine energy woman because a masculine energy woman is going to get gift the shit out of you and you're going to love it but most men are not but all these men think they would want that that's the thing like you think that you would want this yet you're because then spade said the funniest thing i just god i want to just read it because he goes oh he was talking about and i was i told him the story about anya with the train i didn't say anya but i told him about the celebrity because it was like it was funny and he was like oh my god her saying i'm worried about you he goes any woman he because he said an example of a guy in his life who also was like i want to reach out to her. I'm worried about her.

And he goes, that is going to make her hate you so much more. There's nothing women hate more than being worried about. It's just so funny that the only way to get a girl that already doesn't like you to get her to like you less is to say, I'm worried about you. And like, I care about your well-being. And we're just like, ugh. Yeah, I was going to say, read about the Amtrak. Did you hear what I'm saying in your draft? say read about the amtrak heard about the amtrak thing are you okay no is it in your drafts also this is more embarrassing he told me that his he had a little daughter he told me that his daughter was gluten-free and had celiac or some bullshit.

And in our stupid date during our date, I had told him, oh, there's this really cool frozen yogurt. She was allergic to dairy. I'm like, there's a fruit frozen yogurt place in New York. It's in Union Square. It's all fruit. And he was like, oh, really? That's really cool. I'd love to take her there. Where? He seemed a little interested. After the amtrak derailment where he he lived and i never reached out to him i was like maybe he doesn't have my number and i'm looking really cute today and i'm going to that place anyway i spent 20 minutes taking selfies of me holding this fruit froyo and then i sent it to him and was like like, like maybe even without Nikki is dying right now. Are you okay? I honestly am

disassociating. Was this before? I literally stopped listening because I can't handle how embarrassing this is to me. He never wrote me back. I sent the cutest selfie of me with this fruit cup and I was like, this is the place. Was that before or after the train derailment? Oh, it was after

because I talked her out of the train derailment and I go, just wait. Metaphorically, there were two derailments, let's be honest. What if he was in the train derailment and he's dying and then he gets this picture of you with the frozen yogurt? Reminding him of the daughter he's leaving behind

as he bleeds out. I've done this before too, where you set sexual selfies like just like yeah cute selfies like also is that about like remember the frozen yogurt your daughter loves here's my tip here's me rubbing my nipple in this raspberry sherbet i have never i mean i hope to never have to do this kind of shit again where it's just so desperate and sad i mean i sent something to chris over the weekend that really he didn't write back to and i was kind of like what the fuck like i put effort into it so we watched the show alone you know where people

dropped in the wilderness and they have to like fend for themselves and there was this one character that always would go hey bear every time he saw a bear hey bear because that's what you're supposed to say to bears i guess there's a napargozze joke about it too. But he would always go, hey bear, hey bear, his name's Colton. So I saw a bike, you know, like a bike rental thing, you know, like lime scooters, but it was called hey bike. And so I took a picture of the bike and I was like, and then I just put a picture of Colton next to the bike picture and was, and obviously it's just like him going, hey bike. And Chris never wrote back. And I was just so embarrassed. And then last night I go, why didn't you write back to that and he was like i didn't understand it i looked at it for so long

i go why is this mountain man next to a bike like maybe the the it's a mountain bike and he's a mountain man i go that's colton from the show and then he kept going like yeah i just didn't get it i go well now will you acknowledge it now that it's very funny and he's like yes it was very good i'm like don't you ever let something like that go again okay so back to this comment girls are writing or another another guy goes if you did this for me i'd want to marry you lmao yes do it in parentheses a guy like me would immediately fall head over heels for such a sweet thing another guy guy here i would appreciate it and find this incredibly sweet it would be weird if you brought like a random thing, but presumably his favorite came up in conversations. So this is lovely.

I think these are all bots. These sound like guys that want to bang her. Exactly. These are lonely, horny men that are just like, oh my God, the weight of my heart is through my stomach. Like this kind of bullshit. Now let me just see what she wrote back. So she wrote back to

one of these comments and I want to share it with you. She had a little, So she read all the comments, which I guess these are just the comments and the feelings are mixed however i guess that if it's not well received he's not the right person i just don't want to spook him out okay then someone said the right person doesn't run when spooked she said fair enough so what do you think no i want to hear your thought on this because you always have just such mindful and like you've memorized the getting to i do book you kind of know the rules. Do you think, because girls will use this argument quite often and also to give advice to their friends.

We all say like, well, if he doesn't like it, then he's not the right man for you. Where do you land on that? Like, where do you land on not being who you truly are, which is to bake a guy a cake on the second date, just like Bliss did. She ended up getting second place on the show, Love is Blind, but now she's married guy a cake on the second date, just like Bliss did. She ended up getting second place on the show Love is Blind, but now she's married to him.

So it worked out for her in the end after Irina turned out to be a Russian snake. No need to say Russian in there. The last time I said Russian snake, I wanted to say they had nothing to do with each other. I'm just saying she's Russian and a snake, a sleepy Russian snake. Okay, so where do you land, Noah?

Okay, I would tell her do not bake anything until you guys are in a relationship that's like commitment level but what if she's like but i this is so who i am to bake a guy i want a guy who is gonna accept a cake on a first a second date i want to be able to bake a guy who I had a great connection with. Okay. His favorite thing. Here's, that's who I am. Here's what I think about dating and what I hope. Well, because you're saying what you think you're in your masculine energy right now. And I hope Bobby's not anywhere in the fucking room because you should be talking from, I feel if he's overhearing this.

Okay. I hope this is helpful. When you're going out on dates, think of it as like collecting information. You're collecting information about this person so that you can make a wise decision down the road, whether or not you want to spend a lot of your time and openness and vulnerability with this person. So right now you're just kind of like in that phase of collecting information and it's not, you don't want to be so giving because you're opening yourself up to getting walked all over and i think if that's like good advice for when you're dating when

you're starting to make new friends we've all been there we've shown our our kindness and people interpreted as weakness so word okay just see it as it cool. But we're setting the tone also. This is for the ladies. You're setting the tone for the relationship. So if you're, you will have so much time to bake. If you guys get married or you live, you will have your life to bake and be yourself. Get really honest about your motives. Really honest.

That's what I'm saying. I think the motive here is he'll like me more if I do this, which is not great for us. That's not her being her. It's not her being her. That's so it. And you gotta remember at the beginning, you're trying to attract each other. You're not in a relationship yet, so

you gotta do things that will continue the attraction, because at that stage, people could be dating. You're in competition with all the other daters in the dating pool. Brian knows this. But that's what she thinks she's doing. She's like, I'm trying to attract him. Will this attract him?

And all the dudes are like, yes, yes, yes, yes. But they're not. It's attracting these dudes on Reddit. But they don't even know how much they would be unattracted to it if it were actually happening. If they knew that they had this woman on the hook and that there wasn't any chase she's not only she's not only totally on board for you this is also by the way cake on the second date can rep or baking him a dessert can also represent sex giving him something that you put a lot of effort into that is something that you give your someone that you should love, wait for the cake and wait for the pussy until you're in love.

Because this signifies to him that you hope that he... You're in. You hope he likes you. And that's not what dating is about, like Noah said. In the beginning, he's courting you, I think.

I know that's an antiquated idea. No, but if you're the feminine energy in the relationship, which you have to determine what you're going to be, if you're the masculine energy woman, relationship which you have to determine what you're going to be if you're the masculine energy woman you're courting him probably right wouldn't you say yeah but you are both gathering data about each other like noah said so he's gonna gather about you like oh she's very uh giving and i she's gonna bake me stuff and she's kind of trying to i think a feminine energy man would like a cake being baked for him

and that would be a good move to do if you were masculine but on the second date I think well I think what about a man doing that for a woman

let's say buying her disaster I wouldn't like that that would be like too over the top I've done that before I haven't baked a cake but I've done

a gift early absolute disaster what she should do is she should buy all the ingredients for the cake, and then she should bake the cake, and then she should cancel the date and eat the cake. And then the next day she should be like,

oh, I ate this cake. And I'm like, that's my favorite dessert. And she's like, oh, really? I didn't realize. That's it. That's it. We need to know more masculine energy women. Nikki, do you think you are that?

Yes, I do in many ways. But I also think that I'm feminine energy in a relationship in the bed, bedroom. I think at work Nikki is masculine, but in a relationship. A true masculine energy woman in a relationship wouldn't get her feelings heard about like not hearing from a guy or not being cherished, not being wooed. And I don't know that woman. I want to meet her. I would love to meet her i would love to meet like a truly masculine my sister-in-law is definitely masculine energy and in a relationship

too say it again i didn't hear in a relationship as well like she's masculine energy throughout the whole like in the romantic thing i i will say that i don't really respond to flowers and stuff the way that i i'm almost i appreciate them because it means efforts i guess it means they thought of me but i don't i sometimes but that doesn't mean you don't think it's feminine yeah that's like a gift like whether or not you like receiving gifts that's just like your love language or you just don't like flower you don't you're not like are you in your energy woman your your sister-in-law would not need to hear like would not need a guy to text her back She wouldn't need to have her feelings acknowledged like that wouldn't be something that sets her off, but she would need like to be

Respected and all of her work and stuff like appreciated and all that so maybe if she was into baking yeah I'm not I don't care if Chris respects my thoughts like because I just I really don't because I know that he does I know that he thinks I'm funny I know that he thinks I'm smart he often says I'm smarter than him I get that I'm solid in that I don't even need to hear that because I don't think I'm smarter than him but I I'm confident in in my my thoughts being like I I don't I don't need that but I do need when I'm sad someone to be like it's okay to feel this way oh you're sad like I do like that okay moving on this is from the subreddit cool guides and this says how much musicians make from streams? Streaming payouts. Okay.

Spotify, what do you think you're making per stream of your songs, Anya? Oh, God. Like, nothing. Like, for one song. I think 1,500 streams is something. Isn't it like a dollar? I don't even know. I really don't know.

All right. Well, it is.004 cents. So, in order to make a dollar, what is that, Brian? Are you good at math? No, not at all..004. So that's going to need two. It goes to eight cents. So two streams would make you nearly one cent.

Three streams is going to make you... 250 streams makes you a dollar. Really? I think so I just did some math So three I'll say three streams Make you one cent So three times

That is one dollar Or a hundred times So three hundred streams Will make you a dollar I Final thought I encourage everyone today To stream Anya Marina's songs

Three hundred times That's like tipping her a like what if you just leave it on i'll make it yeah just leave it on loop yeah and that um that could work do people do that i think so what if you did it on you what if you just had like several computers running all day long looping your own music i would do that and then by the end of the week you could buy yourself a starbucks at all yes I'm hoping for that. Honestly, Starbucks pays me more than Spotify because I have points. It's so weird.

I just want to, like, Taylor Swift, they've recently released the numbers of, like, her streams. Like, on Spotify every day, they're being like, you know, 80 billion plays or whatever. And you can kind of figure out what they're making from that, and it'll make you sick. Okay. This is from me, I from that and it'll make you sick. Okay. This is from me IRL and it's just a tweet. It's two tweets actually. One person responding

to the other. First person says being new at a job is so embarrassing for no reason. It really is so embarrassing. You just don't know what you can always

tell someone who's new at a place. Their hands are always like at their sides kind of limp. I'm always overdressed whenever i have a new job i'm always wearing like a tuxedo in the office and everyone's like this is casual oh my god and the girl responded and said someone said it feels like you're a new character on season five of a show and the great news is is that you get, once you learn the ropes and you're there for like a month and a half, you're the fucking top dog. Like there is a great, like I do envy and I miss that feeling of like training someone new and being like, oh my God, I've come so far.

I used to be in this position and not know where the aprons were or where the checks went or how to write in a PETA order or whatever it was, whatever restaurant I was working. It feels really good when you can do it and not think about it and not have to worry about every step. And like I would get such anxiety going into work when I had first started a job memorizing the menu, like approaching the table. Like I have to say, waitresses and waiters. That is a really like talk about stage fright. I think that is so much more scary than doing open mic comedy. Like I, I don't think I've ever been so nervous in my life as I was being a waitress and having to be like,

Hey guys, how are you tonight? So we've got some deals on Sam Adams tonight. If you guys are looking at I'm a little thirsty. Also, our special tonight, like it is- So much more desperate than trying to get laughs. Oh, it's so embarrassing.

And I used to get, I can't even believe I did it. Like even thinking about it. So I just want to give a shout out to everyone who's a waiter or waitress out there. Like it is a performance that you don't get a lot of credit for that most people could not do.

Most people would never work in the restaurant industry because it would be too embarrassing. They just can't take that much. I'm guessing Noah is not someone who could ever, would ever be a waitress. I was just going to say, I have never been a waitress or any kind of, Is that a reason maybe? Because it is a great job. And is that a reason? I always wanted to talk to the table. I always wanted to be like the kind of person who could have that job and do that job but you know what because i know that waiters waiters and waitresses are not treated great and maybe you just feel like it's just

soul-sucking and just such hellish work have a little bit of pride in what you do because it's so hard for most people to do that job it really is public speaking on a very small like performing for four people at a four top like that is yes that is way harder than performing for thousands of people based on someone who performs with thousands of people it's way harder to perform for smaller amounts of people in a room where you can see all their faces and they're looking at you it's hell and where your performance is going to be either rewarded or not at the end like i get paid the same amount no matter what and i know there are some fixed places that just have fixed tips but um yeah i just want to give you guys a situation worse if you're a comedian and that is if you do

comedy at a restaurant especially if they're not expecting comedy, that would be harder than that is, man. There's this guy, Kurt Ryan comedy, who does these hilarious, um, memes on Instagram and whether or not you're a comedian,

especially if you're a comedian, you'll really appreciate them. I'm just going to read some of them now that it's on my mind. Uh, Brian, you have to follow him because it's just it's all like inside baseball comedy stuff, but it's also, I think other people can appreciate

it. There's one guy that's climbing a set of stairs and his leg is super long to reach the top step and he's on the bottom step, but his leg looks extended and it says, Open Mike comic is the guy. It says, Open Mike comic on this guy is the guy it says like open my comic

on this guy's back and then each step has a different thing it says hard work strong joke writing paying dues being social and building connections message booker and harass him for spot like all these things you have to do then there's one of um there's people just like um vomiting into different like uh almost getty images of people like about to vomit into toilets and on the top it just says when i'm on stage i like that and then there's one of like winnie the pooh and it's like his face is calm and it says jokes and then it's the one that's kind of like and it says bits and then one at the end just like it looks like a really deranged inbred when even when it says little skits yeah that's just based on what people call what you do comedy like when you start comedy your aunt will be like

how are your little bits doing you know it's changing it's changing gen z tiktokers they're skits now they're all skits that's the cool thing to say it's no way yes it's well i couldn't believe it when it was happening instead of saying bits like i'm working on this new skit it's it's skits now it's all skits out if you're especially if you're a social media person it's like uh i've got these new skits i'm working on i'm doing these skits and that's cool they don't know what a bit is i don't even think oh there's another one it there's another one. It's like a guy with a face palming, the emoji of a guy going like, oh, face palming. And at the top, it's like has little arrows

after each word. It says, I meet someone. Then the next arrow, we talk. Next arrow. They say, put that in your little skits. And then the next thing is die inside. So it's just like little things like this. Or a classic ant thing is like,

have you ever tried writing for SNL it's like the same thing as little skits I mean and classically I mean these are all so tired

for Brian and I because we've heard a million times but I don't know if everyone else knows that we deal with this of like you know obviously

you're a comedian tell me a joke or like you should hang out with me a little bit you'll get a lot of material hanging out with us

please never say any of these things to a comedian you might I wouldn't know it unless i was a comedian i would probably do the same thing to people wait anya didn't you recently tell someone like we had this what happened do you remember the circumstance well i was gonna say two things one is people will sometimes come up to me and be like will you i have some jokes for nik. Will you give them to her? And then people are always like, I have these lyrics. Do you want them for your songs? And I'm like, God, are you kidding me?

No, it happens all the time. You'd think people would understand at least not lyrics. Well, you know what? They don't because they're watching shows like Daisy Jones in the six. And I've got a problem with Daisy Jones in the six. Okay. I am so sick. There's nothing special about the show

that is not exactly what happens on every other fucking show or movie about music. It happened in A Star is Born where a woman writes some lyrics in her little journal and she writes a song. Then a man puts some guitar behind it and suddenly he makes a full song out of her little scribbly lyrics

that she's written down in a notebook that he shouldn't even be reading and then suddenly this woman is going to be a famous singer now because he this man helped like in a star is born she like tells bradley cooper like an idea for a song and then the next night he's on stage and performs the entire song that he has written like a bridge to and then she comes out and sings it and somehow knows it it doesn't make any fucking sense daisy jones and the six sucks if you like it you should probably stop listening this podcast because we have nothing in common i will actually tell me why you like it maybe try to sell me on it we

chris and i watched the first episode and i said should we do the second episode just because i wanted to keep making fun of it because it was so fucking bad and it was just every it's a show that makes you that already thinks you care about the characters even though none of them are famous i don't know any of them i don't i've nothing in vet like sometimes a show you can almost care about a character early because you know this actor and you're like oh i i'm gonna be invested in this because none of these people you recognize the whole there's nothing about them that is likable about any of them you see them aged like

20 years ahead. They look younger than they do in the scene where they're young. The guy, the main guy is too thin. He looks like he should be on The Walking Dead as not a person that's like survived, but one of the walkers. He looks, he's too disturbingly corpsey. He keeps looking like a corpse to me. There's no shade. He's a beautiful man now. He's put on a little on a little weight but i don't i don't get the attraction i don't get how he's like billy is the cool guy around town i hate that this woman who has never once we haven't heard her sing except one time in the shower she goes to concerts oh this is the fable that we all convince ourselves about um this is what we want to believe believe about musicians is that if you like music enough, you can make it. So this girl goes to shows and she's in the audience and she's always just like feeling

the music. And then she meets these musicians that she's been going to see. And they're like, I've seen you in the crowd. You're not there for the band members. You're there for the music. And she's like, you get me. And then this girl who has never sang has only scribbled some fucking lyrics in a notebook and took piano lessons when she was a kid, which we haven't seen any evidence of. She's walking by a place and it says, like, it says a lone piano or something. It says two words like lone piano on this board.

And she walks in, she kind of looks in the window. It's like, I wish I could someday. I wonder if she's gonna by the end of the episode. Then of course she walks in because kind of looks in the window it's like i wish i could someday i wonder if she's gonna by the end of the episode then of course she walks in because her boyfriend has just told her that he's the main guy and she's never gonna be nothing and she pushes him and says i'm the main thing i'm the i'm a star and he goes okay weirdo i've never heard you sing so this is weird that you suddenly want to be a star how am i supposed to glean that i was trying to bring you into my songwriting process because i do know that you're talented in writing but you've never sang before so then she goes in this place and of course she goes to the mic and she has a perfect voice

perfectly trained and or and plays the piano it's so good and i'm just tired of it that's not how anything works it's giving people false expectations it's giving girls a dream that cannot be realized that way. It says nothing of any hard work. It just shows if you like music enough, you can be a musician. It's so bad. I need you to watch it. I need to keep watching it. But I will say that Chris said to me, he goes, we're not watching episode two. He goes, this show is so bad that if you told me you watch the rest of the season and it was the best show you had ever seen and it completely turned around i still wouldn't watch it because it is it is not good there is no redemption after this first episode now if you like the show i want to hear why and i am open

i am open to it i'm open to why this is something you like if anybody admits they like the show after that they're insane i mean but some people like this saccharine shit and i don't know kirsten's like here's my impression of jay-z jones oh she said and she's like hey guys you want to hear a story are you ready for it i don't know if you can take it all right i'll tell you if you guys think you can handle it oh Oh my God, I got to keep watching it. I have to keep watching it. Hate watch. I haven't felt this like kind of, yeah, this energy coming out of me feels good.

This is great. I love it. It feels good to watch. I want to assign you a show or a movie so that you can just tell me how much it sucks. Like Dungeons and Dragons, everybody seems to like. And I watched it. I could not stop laughing in the theater because I thought

parts of it were so bad I would love for you to see that and give me your take let's start watching things we hate that will that people

but it has to be things that people like that we go how are they liking this Horrible Bosses for me was another one I walked out of the theater I don't understand

how anyone can be lied to that much the menu everybody raved about the menu. It was terrible. The preview for that looked good, but I didn't believe that Anna Joy Taylor

eats, so I wasn't able to watch it. I was like, this premise is already out of the realm of possibilities. Spoiler alert, but the way that they solved the problem is, by the way, did you remember that you liked cheeseburgers? That's how they solved the problem in the movie. Oh, did you remember that you liked cheeseburgers? That's how they solve

the problem in the movie. Oh, I don't. Okay, well. You've never seen the movie. Spoiler alert. I haven't seen it. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert.

Okay, well, I definitely am going to watch more Daisy Jones and the Six because I just realized I need more things to make fun of because it's so dumb. Let's watch Daisy Jones

and the Six. Okay, let's keep watching Daisy Jones and the Six. Everyone, you need to watch the first episode. See if you agree with me and if you like the show tell me

what to like about it because I'm actually gonna try and I'm not gonna completely write it off like I do most things even though I am incensed and if you did like it I still would be friends with you I didn't mean to say don't listen to the podcast I still like you there's tons of things I like that you would hate i.e. a Columbine book that I signed this weekend by the way someone brought

a Columbine book to the meet and greet a tattered book called Columbine that I signed this weekend. By the way, someone brought a Columbine book to the meet and greet. A tattered book called Columbine that I've recommended by David Cullen. And I got to sign a Columbine book. The rest of the people in the line were deeply confused. Most people in line

do not listen to the podcast, had no idea why. I was signing a book called Columbine, but I did write in the book, it was meant to be a bombing. Love, Nikki. And so, and I stood for a while thinking, like, what can I write in this book?

Anyway, thank you guys so much for listening to the podcast. We'll be back tomorrow with Brian, Anya, and Noah. Don't be c- and just give Daisy Jones one episode of a chance. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in Ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.