The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #364 Nikki’s Fans, Talking To A Billionaire & "What Are You Living For?”

Episode Date: August 3, 2023

Nikki embraces her mom's unintentional humor, Anya is gushing endless blood, Noa knows all too well what it's like to be around when your hot friend gets hit on and Brian is helping Nikki with an assessment of her fan demographics. Nikki really dug in when she had the chance to candidly chat with a billionaire. Anya shares a dirty tidbit about hotel rooms. Nikki on the other hand, explains how she uses germs to boost her immunity. Have you ever calculated how many days it takes to watch all seasons of Suits? Nikki did the math. They all share their thoughts on UFOs and if contact will ever happen. In the Final Thought, Nikki reveals the question she asked that left a room stunned.  ——— Watch this episode on our Youtube Channel: The Nikki Glaser Podcast Follow the pod on Instagram for bonus content: @NikkiGlaserPod Leave us your voicemail: Click Here To Record Nikki's Tour Dates: nikkiglaser.com/tour Anya's Patreon: patreon.com/anyamarina Brian Frange: brianfrange.com More Nikki: IG More Anya: IG More Brian: IG More producer Noa: IGSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late-night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Here's Nikki. Hello. Here I am. It's the Nikki Glaser podcast.

It's a late night edition. We're recording this. I can't do it. Can you do it? That's pretty good. All right. Yeah, you go in the back. I don't know.

I can't do the back of the throat one. Noah's good at the back. Do it again, Noah. Oh, that's so natural. Me too. How do you do it in the back of your throat? You have to be a Russian Jew. Yeah.

This is what people tuned in for Welcome to the show It's late night It's 6.36 on the west coast And it's like 9.36 Where Noah and Anya just grabbed her boobs What's going on there?

Oh I did? It was totally unconscious They have been growing And not going down. I've had two periods this month in the last 17 days. Holler at me, ladies in perimenopause. What the fuck is going on with my body? I will reiterate. Day one of my period, normally I'm a seven-day girl.

Seven-day period? Oh, my God. No, but guys, a panty liner i never use in a tamp haven't used a tamp in years very light oh for seven days the whole time it's a panty liner exactly just one for years or for the whole time i just like to recycle um no you know like a few a day but very light And then it goes away. But for seven days, that's a lot. That's long.

It's usually like six, but I'm talking like- That's 25% of your life. Whoa. I'm talking like a 1996 Bobby Brown matte lipstick. It's like that brownish thing. Okay. Not blood red. Right. No one has blood red, I don't think.

Do you never bleed? When I was on birth control- That's always kind't think oh you never bleed when i was on birth control like a different color when i was on birth control i had i had the brown but off of birth control yeah i got i have a scarlet red droplet sometimes just hit the bathroom floor so it's been going on for two weeks you said it's just it was like very light for six days and then i had sex on like day eight or nine and matt was like oh we got a little situation here and i was like are you sure that's from the front and i was like he's like i don't know it's kind of i don't know and i was like oh no that's that can't possibly be my period. And it was. And then it started again. Wait, so when he has something on his penis that might be your period blood,

he does tell you about it? Because I don't think my partner does. He just assumes I know. And he just goes in there to clean up on himself. He's not reporting back to me what he's finding on his. He probably knows. Well, he knows who he's dating. I had just done the sheets.

And we have white sheets. So I think he was just warning me like, you have a handprint on your sheets. Right. Okay. Crime scene. Yeah, a little bit. It was like a very light crime scene.

And then I thought it was weird. And then I just let it go. And then like two days later, it just starts up again. Like full on. And went for another seven days. So it's like when so you feel like it's perimenopause

what does that mean it means anyone over 40 is in it that's what my naturopath told me it's just when your periods start to get light

it just means before menopause which happens in your 50s you're over 40 yes that's the first great news

people will be surprised you tricked me You're over 40? Yes. That's the first one. Great news. People will be surprised. You tricked me. At some point, I had to admit it because you're getting older and I just keep staying. And you're very open about it. You can't keep staying my age. I don't know when I'll start lying about my age or concealing it. But this weekend, I was saying a lot like, I'm in my late 30s.

And then I said, at one point I was just like, I'm in my latest 30. And it got such a big laugh. It was one of those laughs where you're like, I didn't even know that was going to be funny. You have a lot of those. Yeah, I just have no idea what I'm saying every time. But someone will like burst out laughing

and you seem kind of perplexed like, why was that funny? Oh, for sure. Then that's when you know like hold on to that one yeah that's good even though i didn't intend for it to be that's really you yeah yeah unfortunately that actually feels good when you're like oh i guess i'm just naturally funny but in a way that my mom is like my mom's never doesn't seem to ever trying to be funny but she is and it makes me i'm so jealous of that but i guess i have a little you have that you are no every comedian every comedian on planet earth has a friend that's funnier than them yes and a mother yeah somebody even today i was at uh this work thing and someone goes i just did you work on barmageddon? And I was like, I did. And he was like, I just got a message

from my friend. I just got a Slack from my friend. Slack. A thing called Slack. Oh yeah. I just got a Slack from my friend

that said, I worked with Nikki on Barmageddon. Let her know her mom is the coolest woman. It was just like, oh. I was like,

oh my God, I made an impression on someone at Barmageddon but it was no, it was my mom. She's the coolest person ever. You're like, I'm her, I made an impression on someone at Barmageddon, but it was no, it was my mom. She's the coolest person ever. You're like, I'm her wingman. Thanks a lot.

When your hot friend gets hit on at the bar and you're like, oh, I thought you were talking to me. I don't even want to talk about how, like, even you mentioning that, it's like triggering for me in a way. I can't handle when I am with a group of friends. You generally, it's like when I'm with one girlfriend and someone else hits on her and not us both equally, not because I'm like, I think I'm prettier than her.

And I'm, this makes me feel like I'm not as pretty. It's just rude to like, I just feel like I've really struggled with it. Like I can remember every single time in my life it's happened to me like and it honestly it's giving me anxiety right now even thinking about it because not only do they not want to fuck me which is like hurtful but and they want to fuck my friend more which is also hurtful but they think it's so it's to do something

that overt where you're just hitting on there's two single women sitting here and you're just hitting on one of them. It means it would be insane. You think it would be insane for me to even think that you would ever be attracted to me because that's such so not even in, like, it means he didn't even think like she might be hurt by this because she's kind of fuckable too. You didn't even consider it. Exactly. And so it hurts doubly like that. And I'm sure people are going to investigate this and talk about it on Reddit,

how I'm so insecure and everything like that. But I am, and I'll be the first to say it. It really bothers me. A similar thing happened just now to me with you. Really? I was walking down, I was in the good side of it. I was walking down the sidewalk towards the hotel. I saw it. And and you waved at me and then there was another guy between us he thought you waved at him and he was like did you just wave at me and then he waved back and then i i made sure not

to do anything so i didn't want him to know that you were waving at me and i saw that i saw that you made that choice and i'm so proud of you because i wanted him to because i would wave at him you would wave at that generally, but I didn't. I was already waving like when he came into the lane. Yeah, there was no way to avoid it. And I knew that once he saw you, he'd be like, oh God, she's probably waving at him. But because you didn't wave back, he can walk through life now thinking,

maybe she was waving at me. So it was a joint effort and you did a good job. Yeah, now if you see him again, you're going to have to wave. And we'll delete this part of the podcast. the podcast no no he won't hear it i was just gonna say that's my nightmare in high school i remember someone waving at me i think it was a girl who i desperately wanted to be friends with and i was like oh she's finally waving at me and it was someone behind me one of her click and i was just like does anyone wanted to to fuck you or like fuck someone else and you were like hurt by that does that i i mean maybe it's just me i was always the

funny quirky friend never the one hit on it always happens to me when i'm with nikki so yes yeah no yes no when moon tower 2018 how can i forget it oh we're walking in the street and like a bunch of guys turning their heads looking at you and I'm just like a piece of shit, nothing. It's because I'm,

they recognize me because my face was on like the telephone poles there. because you're gorgeous. It doesn't count if you're famous. No, it doesn't count

if you're famous. It's, and listen, I'm not, I'm not a nugga. I know that there are people that would be interested in me, but it is really devastating.

I don't know why it's so devastating when it happened uh when it happens to me but I I will say that yes that probably happened at moon tower but I do think it's because they recognize me and that is a problem like when I'm somewhere where I'm recognizable and I'm in an environment where people know I'm going to be there so they know it's me I do feel like like, oh, no one around, like the girls around me aren't getting any attention. Like they're, but I don't feel like it's actually earned like the way it is when I'm just two girls sitting at a restaurant and no one knows who they are. And these guys are just like, I'm sorry. I just have to tell you, you're so beautiful. Like

that's, I can, I don't think it's ever happened to me where someone's just been like, I actually, it happened the other day. Okay, well, I'll say it. This guy, I was walking to meet Lizzie for lunch, and this guy was like pulling out onto the street, and I had just parked my car. But I think he's full of shit because I looked disgusting this day. Like I wasn't dressed up at all.

That doesn't matter. Everyone has their type. I was wearing a dirty bucket. No, and he goes, excuse excuse me ma'am and i just turned around and he in his windows rolled down and he looks at his phone like he's gonna be like can you tell me how to get like he's looking at his phone like um uh i just want to tell you you're very beautiful and i was just like thank you like i was literally like it never ever happens to me thank you so much and he was not attractive there was and he's a guy that probably

does this to women 12 times a day that's quite a trick he was you so much. And he was not attractive. There was, and he's a guy that probably does this to women 12 times a day. That's quite a trick. He was looking at his phone like he was like trying to find directions. Yes. And so I got a little closer

to be like, what do you need? There's nothing better than giving someone directions. Oh yeah. And I had no idea. How easy is it to give someone directions?

I have a phone and you have a phone too. Right, right. Who's even asking for directions anymore? How old was he by the way? Oh, I'm 40s, 50s. But like, you could tell he was like a sleazy dude,

not an attractive guy, but like this is his thing that he does. I mean, it was, but the fact that he wouldn't have done it unless he wanted to have sex with me and that is complimentary in my book. As a woman in her latest 30, I take it as a compliment

that someone wants to come in me. Absolutely. And would like to do that. What was response i said i literally was like thank you that's so nice thanks and then i like backed away slowly and then quickly and then ran um into the starbucks to get my third of the day i will say there's a converse thing that happens to you too like just like you were saying being famous you kind of you feel like it's not earned but then i feel like you also probably don't realize that there's a percentage of guys who don't hit on you and act like they don't know who you are because you are famous and i've seen it happen i've seen it happen multiple times not just with hitting on you but they sort of subtly neg

you because you're famous they want to connect with you they want to bond with you so they're like they give you shit in a way and it's actually like to you it's rude but you don't realize like because they just saw you perform and they're like kind of wowed by you or whatever they're like i know how to get with this girl i'm gonna fucking be really rude to her or you know like dirty or ignore her and i know that i know that that's hitting on me i'm not i don't ever i'm i'm i'm not one to get offended by guys saying the wrong thing or like saying like tripping over themselves i know that if a guy talks to me he probably wants to like if a bumbling dude is they're kind of like they probably ever had a girl nag you when you're like, I know you want to be my friend, but you're just nagging me because...

Oh, the other day, this girl we are spending time with, a woman, she said, I want to come see your show. I love filth. And I was just like, oh, cool. It's more than that. And I actually have a lot to say about the patriarchy if you look at the undertones of what... But I was just like, cool. Like, it's more than that. And I actually have a lot to say about the patriarchy if you look at the undertones of what, like, but I was just like, okay. To justify your comedic existence.

Here's my term paper. Most girls that like me, I have to say they're like, there's, they, but I take this as a compliment. They're women who are kind of like, kind of like dirtier or like a little bit like rough around the edges or have dark thoughts. They're a little bit more masculine energy. And we were kind of exploring dirtier or a little bit rough around the edges or have dark thoughts. They're a little bit more masculine energy. We were kind of exploring this the other day.

My Instagram following and also this podcast. The podcast demo. The podcast demo. You want to tell them what it is? People listening to the podcast, you fit into a demo. Besties listening to the podcast right now, I want you to pick a number in your head.

How many percent of women listen to the podcast versus how many men listen to the podcast right now i want you to just pick a number in your head how many percent of women listen to the podcast versus how many men listen to podcast based on the way it's broken down in the instagram yeah so just think of a number in your head so we have 24 000 instagram followers which is a good sampling of what our listenership is and um it is almost exactly correlated with my um my Instagram following too, which I- Fans of Nikki Glaser. Yeah, I thought it would skew a little bit differently,

and I'll tell you why in a second, but I want to ask Noah and Anya what they think. I'm going to say 18,000 of the 24 are women. So what's that percentage? What'd you do with that? Can you use a percentage? What do you do? More than 50 less than 60. What are you writing? What'd you do with that? Can you use a percentage? What do you do? You're like writing down.

What are you writing? Okay, I'm going to say 56%. Wait, 18,000 was way more percentage than... Okay, 60%? How do you figure this out mathematically? I think you do 18 times 24, right? I would do 18,000 divided by 24,000. Okay. Or you could just do 18 times 24, right? I would do 18,000 divided by 24,000.

Or you could just do 18 divided by 24,000. That's 75%. 75% as women. Okay, I'll say less. I'll say less. I'll say 62% are women. 62% women.

Which means that it's 86% men. JK. Good one. You got me. She almost agreed to it. I'm going to say it's the inverse of that. I think it's like maybe 60 to 65% men.

Oh, okay. Less women than men. I don't remember. I don't either. Oh my God. No, I'll look it up right now. Whatever it is, it's surprising and my God. No, it's, I'll look it up right now. It's, it's. Whatever it is, it's surprising and not memorable.

No, no, no. It is memorable, but I believe, I just want to get it exactly right. Okay. Okay. Looking at professional dashboard. Yeah, you got to go to your professional, total followers. Total followers. Where is it?

Right there. Total followers. How dare you touch my phone? I'm sorry. Isn't it weird when someone else looks at your phone and then they touch it and you're just like, easy. Okay. I could, you could just point at it.

You touched my phone. I would, no, I would never care. Look at all those, easy. Okay. You can just point at it. You touched my phone. No, I would never care. Look at all those spots. I want you to know I would never care if you touched my phone. There are some people who have touched my phone recently. Oh, I think it's moved. Oh, wow. Okay. It is 54% men, 45% women, which is very different from my own

Instagram. I didn't mean to say that. I'm 70% men follow me on Instagram and my boyfriend thinks it's because I'm a hot girl. And I'm like, but I'm not posting. Thirst traps. Not even a one, maybe one or two. I have legs out in some photos, but it's not like you can't come to any of the picture. I mean, I challenge you. Maybe they think your personality is attractive. I think it's because I have a masculine, I have a masculine sense of humor. And I think that's because I have a masculine I have a masculine sense of humor and I think that when I encounter women and especially besties

they're always like kind of the girls that are like you talk like me you talk like there's kind of like a secret code we have where it's like I say weird shit too I think these weird things too I'm different like you they have life experience

they've experienced something and sometimes it's traumatic. Sometimes it's just like, yeah, I've been through it. Yeah. That type of person. They're nonjudgmental too. Yeah, nonjudgmental. In a crazy way where it's like,

I just feel like they accept me and they're just like, I'll be like, I like your skirt. And they're just like, I don't need to hear that. But like, they're like, they're like, they're not desperate. Like whenever I meet a best name,

I'm always like, you're so cute. And and i like compliment i found that at meet and greets when i compliment girls clothing they're not as excited as i would be and i'm not just doing it to like make them like me i really am not i wouldn't say anything if i didn't actually like something but generally they're always just like thanks like they just like pose for the photo they They're like, I'm like, your skirt is so cute. And they're just like. Yeah, they're not freaking out so much. Yeah, I'd be like, oh my God, do you want it? I'll give it to you.

Like I'm always like, oh, I'll tell you the price I paid for it. And you can go to the website and I'll send it to you. And they're just like, I didn't even mean it, bitch. I was walking around Kingston having dinner the other day with a couple of musicians. And I get up from a tiny little hole in the wall in my tiny little town. And this girl comes up to me and she's like, Anya, I'm a bestie. I was like, what? I was so not ready for that in this context.

I've never I've been recognized once in this town for my music just from my name, but never like from the podcast. So it was so cool. And she was tall. She was lovely. She was having dinner with her mom. She was educated. I could just tell. Don't ask me how she used some big words.

She was just lovely. And she just seemed, I don't know, down to earth and cool. It seems like the besties are good people. That's what I get. That's really important because there are some podcasts out there that I won't name. I guarantee you

the hosts of those podcasts do not want to hang out with their fans at all. Agreed. I couldn't agree with you more. I know some people that have been around certain people's fan bases

and I know certain people hate their fan bases because they're obnoxious and they're drunk and they're mean Because they're obnoxious. Yeah. And they're drunk and they're mean and they're bullies or whatever. And ours, I saw a girl the other night. Shout out, I forget your name. You're so sweet.

And you brought your friend with you and her friend. It was at my show at Supernova in LA. She's like, I've seen you three times here. And so sweet. I think I've met her before, like in the parking lot there. But we took a picture. And then her friend, which is always so sweet when the person that they bring vouches for like, I hear about you all the time.

It's such a sweet thing. And she's like, you're like a household name in our house. It's so sweet. And yeah, they're always just, they're less needy than me. They're who we want to be. They are like. They're kind of like Anya. This trip was like, I'll let you go.

You're having, I just want to say hey, but I'm letting you go. Thank you. Anya, I realize you're like the more mature, self-aware, not desperate, not insecure version of me. Oh, that's so nice. Because I aspire to your, I always tell people like,

Nikki's easy breeziness around flaking and friendship is a huge asset to me. But you're like that too. Yeah. I like the freedom to flake. Oh, man. Freedom to- I flaked the other day. Attend or not attend.

I flaked on something, but I didn't flake. Is flaking, flake's like when it's the day of, right? Not necessarily. Is a week before a flake? A week's not flake's like when it's the day of, right? Not necessarily. Is a week before a flake? A week's not a flake, unless it's a huge deal. Right. I wouldn't do a wedding

a week in advance. No. Can you flake on a funeral? I think whenever it's a funeral, I don't think you can flake on a funeral because you could always say that you were uncomfortable, you were too emotional.

It didn't, the funeral is for, you know, to support the family. Obviously, if you're like the son, it's really weird if you don't go. But to go to a funeral is a difficult thing to do. Yeah, that's a good point. I don't think you can really flake on it. Well, I flaked on something that was an appointment, a thing I pay for, an appointment that I pay for.

And I said, I can't do it this week because I'm working too much. And there was a feedback of like oh this is a bummer and it's just like please don't say it I already feel like it's a bummer oh that's not good well you're paying them the whole they gotta be able to deal with that they felt like I I feel bad taking your money because we're I'm charging you for this thing and I have to charge you and And they felt guilty, but I was just like, no, I'm good with that. I'm choosing to do this. Can I pay you not to be bummed out loud?

I know. I just don't like, you know, who wants to disappoint anyone? But what I really took it as is like that person just like wants to hang out with me. Oh yeah, those one-on-one professional relationships become personal so fast. You know it well, hiphop darian what oh yeah darian hip-hop henning your dance teacher for over two years the person like my my stylist my hair stylist oh oh my god

we got into this the other day brian was like and i've been seeing this stylist and me and my friend are like you go to a stylist like what have they done yeah they do my hair and we're like oh a hair stylist and he's been calling a hairstylist a stylist i still do and we go brian stylist i like that because i don't go to a barber a barber is a guy with a who is from Estonia who can trim your head with a buzzer and that's it. He's got pictures

of other men that have been on the wall since the Reagan administration and he can do one haircut and that's a barber. I go to a stylist who has a vision. Generally, it's a woman

and she is very good at cutting my hair so that it looks nice even though I usually wear a hat I know you do usually wear a hat and you do have great hair so I

I would like you to um well I wear a hat on the podcast because it's too early for me to shower first so then I need to wear a hat have you ever

thought of dry shampoo um I've never thought of it it's never crossed my mind and I'm still not thinking about it. Men look good with greasy hair a lot of times, though. Yeah.

Not me. I mean, one time you commented on it because I woke up with bedhead. No, it was because it was messy. You were like, you're a filthy piece of shit, Brian. It was just so messy. All you needed to do was brush it.

I can't. Okay, let's go to break and unpack that when we get back. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. The Daily Show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture. You get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment, politics, sports, and more from Jon and the team of correspondents and contributors.

The podcast also has content you can't get anywhere else, like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines. Listen to The Daily Show, ears edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, we're back so um one thing i wanted to get to is this weekend this past weekend when i did nine sets the same number of taylor swift concerts i've been to or no it will be nine this weekend i'm going to taylor swift on saturday in la why did i think you were up to 10 okay, I might be up to 10 by mid next week because she is going, she's doing Thursday, Friday,

Saturday, wait, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, taking off Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday,

Thursday, or something like that. I mean, she's doing six shows in LA, so it's going to be wild. Wow. But,

so, yeah, I did a bunch of sets last week and one of these, I was, I got off stage and Jeff Ross

was already backstage like at the um comedy store the main room there's like a it's my favorite green room of any comedy club it's like up there with the comedy cellar upstairs of like comic hangouts and it's just there's just nowhere else to really like at the improv there's nowhere that comics hang but this place is it's always good and he um he was there and then i don't know how this happened again i guess i got he went up first he brought me up i get off stage and then when i come back off stage in the back room um there are like two guys with him and jeff introduces me and says this is brian he invented airbnb oh. And I go, what?

That's right. And I was like, you started Airbnb? He goes, yeah, me and two other guys. I go, do you still own it? And he's like, yeah. And I'm like, just thinking of like, I can't wait to type his name in and write Net Worth. Sure, of course.

Which by the way, you don't even need to type in Net Worth because it fills in right away because that's what everyone wants to know. But those aren't really accurate. If you go to his Wikipedia, it literally, it's the first thing that pops up. But very nice guy. And I just went into, so Jeff was there with his buddy Avery and I know both of them. But I just snapped into like, I'm with a billionaire.

Like I'm with a multi-billionaire. This is someone who is one of the richest people in the whole world. I got to know things. Sure. So so i went instantly what doctor do you go to really that would be your question i would be like what doc do you go to a special doctor for rich people that has special medicine that we don't get okay i gotta ask him that because i think we're friends now oh my god um he was so normal so nice as nice as nice as normal as you could ever imagine i mean you'd never think this person's a billionaire. I don't know how you're supposed to dress if you're a billionaire,

but I just imagine a lot of- Dressed like me. Yeah, probably, actually. Did he have a fanny pack? He probably had a stylist, though. Yeah. He did not have a fanny pack. He was hanging out with a stylist.

Was his hair really good? His hair was good. Yeah. He was a good-looking dude and dressed sharply, had a white jacket on. I liked wearing white as bold. And I think he kind of had white pants on. So it was almost like a whole white look.

But it wasn't like trying too hard at all. That sounds like it was and you're rolling your eyes, but it wasn't bad. He looked cute. So what'd you ask him? So at first I said, I'm like, my whole brain is shuffling. Like, I got to figure out what this guy... And he's hanging out though. So I'm like, whole brain is shuffling like I gotta figure out what this guy and he's hanging out though so I'm like okay I got some time yeah and I first went to I needed to ease in for play

because I'm gonna get to the dirty stuff but I need to know I just was like so I go you you started Airbnb what year 2007 okay okay and then I'm like can you give me this like just a short story of how it began I know I could google this and I'm sorry to ask I'm sure you've told this a million times and he's like no that's fine and I go wait you know what tell me the name was the name Airbnb like is that where did that come from and it's kind of an interesting story the first Airbnb was these guys were like out of college he's a year I think younger or older than me so they were like fresh out of college he was a engineer he was designing toys and like um sports equipment or something you know he was just designing things products and um and he and his buddies noticed there was a convention in san francisco

in town it was like i think it was like a democratic convention that might have been later on the story so forgive me if i'm wrong but there was some kind of convention in town and they noticed like all the hotels were booked up because they were trying to maybe get their friends a hotel and they were like well we have space here wouldn't it be funny if we just made a website and put up our apartment and we'll get some air mattresses it'll be an air mattress b&b bed and breakfast So they just put one room up and it sold and there were three people that stayed. It was the first three customers

for Airbnb and he told me there was an interesting story about who they were. There's three people out there that are the first Airbnb people. But another thing, so that's how it started and then he went back home for Thanksgiving to his family and was telling them about this thing that he did and everyone was making fun of him it's such a dumb idea and then i think

then that's when the democratic national convention came through and they were like let's try it again i think the before it was a tech convention thing and the and the democrats loved it people are like they're like they maybe put up like three more places like their friends did it and the democrats didn't love it but they had something going. And then the Republican National Convention came through and they didn't like it. Oh. So they had no room.

So it just kind of shows you that- Wow. It's a- The trust factor. Yeah, because if you remember back when Airbnb came out, it was insane. Yeah. It was.

And I have a super host right here on my podcast. A former super host. I Airbnb'd for years. That's how I paid my rent when Nikki moved out. And it was hard. And I did not, I was not like providing the best shampoos. I had problems with my shower, I'm sure. But in New York City, I was almost always booked.

Yeah. And it was, but it was wild when we first and it was but it was wild when we first heard out about it was kind of around the same time Uber happened and we were all like why would you ever get in

someone a stranger's car we all used to be scared of strangers I remember my first Uber you do I remember my first Uber because I was so baffled

by the fact that this existed because I was in New York City and it's like well there's taxis yeah why would we take an Uber I was in New York City and it's like, well, there's taxis. Why would we take an Uber? I was at the on the west side yard

where the tennis courts are and the pool and all that sports shit. And my friend was like, let's take an Uber. And it wound up being so easy. I was like, they can't just pick you up. You don't have to fight anybody for it. I mean, sometimes you do. You have to fight when you get in. It was like, they come just pick you up. You don't have to fight. You don't have to fight anybody for it. I mean, sometimes you do.

Yeah. You have to fight when you get in. It was really good. And the rest is history. Then after that day, they said that we're going to make this a bigger thing. You were the one. I did. I was the one. If we can get that guy to believe in this, we can get anyone.

I do remember hearing about Airbnb and just being like, gross. I don't want to stay at someone's house. I mean, it reminds me of the Jim Gaffigan joke about hotels. And he breaks down like, if you, if someone was, if you're trying to get a new mattress like you are, and someone was like, do you want this stranger's old mattress to sleep on? You'd go like, no, disgusting. I would never, what about a pillows?

We'll put on some new sheets, but just the pillows. We'll wash the sheets. You'd go disgusting. I would never. What about pillows? We'll put on some new sheets, but just the pillows? We'll wash the sheets. You'd go, disgusting. But we do that every time we go to a hotel and we pay for the luxury of it. A bathrobe that someone's worn before, you go, look at this bathrobe. Someone's jerked off in that before.

But we're just in this illusion. And you are your worst self in a hotel room. There is nothing holding back in a hotel room. Oh, disgusting. There is nothing holding back in a hotel room. I know. I'm living in one right now, and I have to check myself. Yeah. It's gross.

And yeah, just towels as napkins is the classic one. And just always missing the toilet when I throw the toilet paper behind me. Sure. 80% of the time, I do that anyway in my life. That was another segment on Not Safe where we went to a hotel room and did the blacklight and tried to check what was the

dirtiest part of the hotel room. It was the pillows, right? I think the dirtiest part was the remote for the television. You interviewed a cleaning lady at a hotel and she said, we have never once even put a napkin on the remote on a hotel television.

Yeah, and that's when I came, someone told me about the, you take the bag from the ice bucket and you put it around the remote control and you tie a knot and then it can still work throughout the bag. And then if you lose it in bed, you can hear the crinkling too.

So it helps you double. And I only recently learned the horror of, I read on Reddit or something, people use hotel kettles to clean and sterilize their underwear. You told me this and I couldn't believe it until I Googled it. And it's disgusting.

Oh my God. Disgusting. And I have used so many kettles. Why are they doing that at all? I've never even heard of this, but it's a thing. Disgusting. Why are they doing that at all? I've never even heard of this, but it is a thing that people wash and sterilize their underwear by boiling it in the tea kettle.

Why don't they just take it home and wash it in a washing machine? Who is sterilizing their underwear? I don't get it. I think drinking tea out of your disgusting underwear broth. Do you know how much we eat feces every day that's why when kirsten dropped cookies on the floor the other day i go yeah of course and some of us um it's a seasoning but kirsten dropped cookies on the floor the other day

and she sent us a picture of them all like splattered on the floor and i was like just pick them up and wipe them off because they unless you can see it it's not gonna kill you and then i loved it because i saw but she said they were wet so i was like okay that makes sense if they're wet on them and they're just not enjoyable if there's like hair and pieces of wet dirt on your cookie see it but if you can't see anything and you examine it closely eat the cookie it's you i mean we're constantly inhaling skin dust and cells and stuff and eating it dust all the time my friend doesn't kiss girls or doesn't french kiss because he's disgusted by it he's right you know what at least he follows a his he follows logic if he's

not eating something off the ground he shouldn't be making out with a girl that was always my argument when people would be like god i got sick i have the flu i got a cold there's like there was a baby on the plane that was sneezing and i'm like or was it you ate ass this weekend like why do you why are you so grossed out by sharing a drink or like a a spoon or something but like you can't off the floor but joe list had a joke in his act that i loved as someone who eats off the floor constantly and he was like has anyone ever died from eating something off the floor have you ever seen a toddler pick up a cookie and they just start bleeding from their eyes you eat off the floor it doesn't happen and i know you could argue like no you get sick later no you don't

you're getting sick because you're like using too much hand soap and you're, I've stopped washing my hands. I barely wash my hands too. Why? I'm sorry. I'm sorry to say it is so disgusting. Why? Wait, wait, you should wash your hands. If I have not pooped on my hand and my hand does not feel wet from a, um, poop from wiping

or like from, from, from pee. Okay. I don't pee. Okay. I don't care. Okay. Because I know that I touched the handle and I always hit the flush with my foot if I'm in a public place. I'm sorry to people who are touching that

and it's touching the bottom of my foot. Wash your hands then. I'm not going to. I don't care what you do, but if you were cooking for me, I would want you to wash your hands. Yeah, of course. But what universe do we live in?

In what universe am I cooking for you I never If you were like I'm going to hand it out to you And say you want some I would say why didn't you get some of your own I'm planning on eating this whole bag Well if you just took a piss and then you didn't wash your hands And then someone said hello and then would you shake their hand

Or would you feel bad Yes because guess what this is my logic And maybe I'm wrong and besties are going gonna revolt and now now they're gonna be judgmental but i don't think they will if you are walking around if this door handle right here has more germs on it than the than or at least as many as something near my toilet because that's the door's handle's not getting cleaned that's getting sanitized every time a maid comes in my toilet at least is probably a couple times and there's no poo particles so no one would be offended if i touched the door handle and then shake shook your hand so why do you care i didn't if i have debris on my hand i'm gonna

smell like shit germs make your immune system stronger we need germs i have to say i don't get sick and so if this didn't work if this made you sick and maybe that's an i should knock on wait where's wood knock on wood knock on wood but um it makes you mentally sick i think maybe there's a bacteria that eats my brain and makes me want to jump off a bridge but um i also think that yeah just i think it's hypocritical at least your friend is in line with his moral like i'm not going to make out with girls because i wouldn't do all these other things when people are hypocritical and don't when chris grimaces when i like a piece of salad will like drop on the the table and i'll just pick it up and put it back on i'm like i want every morsel

and i'm a i'm like a food uh weirdo so i just want to eat everything that I... I looked at what I was going to eat. It's already in my body as far as I'm concerned. So it better all end up in my body, no matter what. I'm going to wash my hands after this podcast. You should. I do it in front of you performatively most of the time. I did wash my hands just now. Oh, you did?

Yeah, before we began, because I knew I was going to touch the equipment. I'm aware of that. Well, no, I mean, whenever I'm holding a microphone or something, my hands just feel like they could use a nice wash now that's smart if i touch a dog i'm gonna wash i don't i gotta be honest i don't want to touch your dog i'm kind of like i'll touch your dog on you because i've never met it before and it looks so fuzzy and cute but most dogs make me feel soiled when i'm like i have to wash my hands after my dog. I was conditioned to do that growing up. I was like, never eat

after touching a dog. And so I still, I always have to wash my hands because they have an oil on them. Don't you give your dog kisses? I make out with her. I kiss her cheek. I kiss her nose. But their nose doesn't have anything on it. It's totally clean. But I wipe her butthole every

day after every poop. Oh yeah, I clean my dog's asshole. Why? You don't have to. No wonder she likes you. Because she sleeps on our bed because she rubs it all over the fucking place. You guys don't wipe your dog's ass? If you don't wipe a dog's ass, does poo get everywhere?

Sometimes they have a messy poop. Well, Marion will have your butthole and you got to get it out and wash it. But that's like if it's a runny one. If it's a messy poop. Well, Marion will have your partner fur and you got to get it out and wash it. But that's like if it's a runny one. If it's a messy poop, you got to change the diet. And then they don't have messy poops. You want a solid...

You think every dog has a pee-pee? I don't know anybody else. I've never met anyone else who wipes their dog's ass. Really? I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but I think that maybe this is unusual. To anyone listening, give it a shot. Why not? No, it makes sense,

because your dog's ass is literally on your pillow right now in the background if you want to see. So I don't think it's a bad idea to wipe your dog's ass if you go to see on our YouTube. If you're fine with it. It's literally his asshole is on your pillow. He's rubbing up on your pillow. I know. She's so cute. If it doesn't bother you like your dog's ass and it's just fine then that it doesn't matter but

i'm just saying i don't think i've ever met anyone you know that if she farts the poop particles are still getting on the pillow i'm sorry on you yes there's no avoiding the poop particles now now you're just you're splitting hairs no butthole hair yeah exactly the butthole hairs are parting when the poop i also wipe after every walk i have a cold cloth and i just wipe her nose and face because there's an ant um because she sniffs shit and i'm like i'm gonna be kissing that face I gotta wipe this urine and shit off that's what everyone should do speaking of germs I have been going to

mattress stores and laying down in mattresses in the stores and my god some of these mattresses I went to a Macy's a basement Macy's and those mattresses I think have never been touched by any sort of cleaning implement for at least six years.

I would think the basement of a Macy's, a mattress department of a Macy's, would look as if it was a place to hide out during The Last of Us. Oh, yeah. That would be, yes. That's what it is now. Like, it would just be an abandoned, overgrown. I got to say, I went to the mall in in tarzana which is a place that i've never really been and the mall was fucking hopping i thought malls were dead i think malls are back malls are i've heard it yeah i went to one today and i thought it would be dead too and it was

there was a food court there was like what were you at a mall for vegas starbucks i was on a road trip back from canada oh okay, you picked one at a mall and you didn't know it until you pulled up. Yeah, I was like, God damn it. I hate when that happens. And I think you and I have been at that mall because we've been to so many. We've been to the worst Starbucks in this country

than anyone. The Dyson hair dryer. I think it was that one, remember? I took a picture. Yeah, that's something I would do. Oh, yeah. God, isn't it weird that you can dry your pussy under a Dyson hair dryer and not remember as even a thing of it not even that's

something that you should obviously imprinted in your memory i guess i did wash my pussy that day that's so funny yeah um so it's very germy oh there the macy's basement in tart in the mall in tarzana i there was people's hair all over the mattress and like i wear my hat when i'm laying down on those pillows but there's dandruff on the pillows there's hair on the mattresses there's stains on the mattresses are there sheets on the mattress or it's just no it's just a straight mattress and like you're supposed to you know lay in that for like 15 minutes and it's like it 15 minutes is a little long wait anya wasn't there for yesterday's podcast and she hasn't been able to listen to it yet i just want to hear now that the besties the besties are all in on

something that you're not in on and this will be fun okay how many hours do you think brian frangie spent at a mattress store one day before he purchased the mattress. And this is not to say he didn't spend hours prior to this trip. But in one day, the day he purchased his mattress that he now hates and he's trying to replace. How many hours did he spend at the store that day? I want to say, did I hear this? Was it six? Yeah, I kind of.

Didn't you think that was a joke number? Yes, for sure. Wait, six joke number? Yes, for sure. Wait, six consecutive hours? Yes, Anya. Well, except for we had a lunch break. Oh, he went and got a smoothie because he was forced to because the guy was like,

I'm starving, man. I got to eat something. Yeah, the salesman... He said, I can't leave unless you leave. Were you working at the time? Like, were you on your phone? Or you were just lying there staring? He was talking to the guy.

I would lay in i would lay in the mattress for 15 minutes and then i would be like okay i think i didn't know how this feels then i would get up and i would lay in another mattress for 15 minutes and occasionally the man would come over and say how does that mattress ever a time you got on a mattress and go i don't need to do the whole 15 minutes because it's clearly not it sometimes i said i need i need longer you're like speed dating i need 25 minutes on this one. Really? I was so baffled and confused. I had no idea what was going on. This did not yield good results for him, I want to say.

Terrible results. Because he was famished. He was confused. Yes. He was missing his family. He was hungry. He was homesick. I felt like a refugee.

He really was. And he picked the worst mattress. I picked the worst mattress. It's being discontinued probably i don't know but i i do want to publicly complain about tempurpedic for a second let's get some besties uh writing to you about what they think and what tell me what mattress you have okay here's what what do you want in a mattress and if a bestie can fit these requirements right to you i like a mattress i i'm looking i want to sleep on my back and i'm looking for a foam mattress a memory foam

mattress that i sink into and i stay in that position and then wake up like a vampire that has not moved an inch the entire night because he's learned from his doctors that for his health he should sleep on his back and we don't need to get into why because it's a whole other podcast but he needs to be sleeping on his back and he wants to sink into it and mold it around his body. And I slept in an Airbnb in Utah and there was a foam mattress and I slept in it and I had a great night's, a good night's sleep. And then we messaged the Airbnb owner and there was a memory foam mattress and they said that mattress is a $500 mattress we got from Wayfair. So I remember this. Yeah. So I know that a memory foam mattress

is good for me, but the one that I got is hard as a rubber brick and it makes my back feel like hell. Help him. But what happened to waiting for Noah's four months? Noah said, wait for him. He's got 90 days to return it.

I would like to add, I don't know who this bestie is, but we did have a comment on our YouTube page from the last episode. The first episode where you talked about this issue. Oh no, this has been going on that long. And the bestie. That's what I'm saying.

And the person said- Yeah, we're on episode three of Mattressgate. Mattressgate. So the bestie said that it does take, I think, three months for your spine to also adjust to a new mattress so your body also has to adjust to it's not just the mattress i get that but this is beyond this is beyond that this is horrific sleep my wife lays in the bed have the luxe breeze from tempur-pedic and can you confirm that that sucks? Medium hybrid lux breeze. Medium hybrid lux breeze.

If you got that $6,000 mattress recently after spending a fourth of a day at the store. Wait a second. What about

the obvious thing? Why don't you return it and then contact the Airbnb and offer them double for that exact mattress and have it shipped to you? I can buy that mattress.

I can buy that mattress off Wayfair but it's a shitty mattress. It won't last. I'll get it and it'll last like seven months. That's the reason they had it. But who cares? Are you sure seven months? Yeah, exactly. Why would it last seven months? I think it'll last. Because I read the reviews

of the mattress and people talked about it like this mattress is fucking terrible. It was nice out of the box, but maybe it's right for you. He went to Purple today. I went to the Purple showroom. They use like a... It's almost like rubbery. Yeah, it's like a rubber egg crate type thing.

And I got to say, pretty comfortable. I like those. When I felt the material, because I used to do ad reads for them back in the day. Oh, yeah. They sent me like a little sample and I used to just play with that thing constantly and like press on it and feel like,

oh, how your pressure disperses. And so I'm very into a purple mattress. I think we should get a sponsorship because I think if they gave me a king size mattress, I would talk about it nonstop because I'm looking for a new mattress, purple, if you're listening.

Look out. And I really need a king size. I mean, I'm kind of using you as someone to go out and try these mattresses for me. Yeah, yeah. No, I am ready to go to more mattress stores.

Speaking of time being wasted, can I just just say that um we're sorry for this yes first of all apologies we'll move on but this is it's it's interesting i mean this is a this is a big purchase in your life we spend half your life sleeping um another thing someone spends half of their life doing if you happen to be a fan of the show is watching suits if anyone out there suits is the number one show on netflix what it's been it's there's was like 3.9 billion minutes watched over the weekend or something it's some like is that a usa show yes but now netflix bought it and if you've been on netflix in the past month they are pushing suits so hard it's always in your top like suggested things but um so chris my boyfriend ages ago when we were not dating it was in between

our dating and he had a um he was an abu abu dhabi for an abu jabi and um this is the favorite best joke i've ever written possibly what about about Helsinki? Heaven floaty. Oh yeah. Helsinki more like heaven floaty. Okay. So I did not say that on stage, but I said it to Anya and Chris backstage and they were like, say it tonight.

And I was like, I don't think I can. I don't think I ever want to repeat that because I just was like, more like heaven floaty. And they just slowly turned their heads to me. Like, did you just think of that it was the same moment like when i we were so jet lagged i was because i was just like kind of mumbling to myself in the corner i was like helsinki more like heaven floating and

but i remember you both being like did you just think of that which is the same response that i got when i was in kappa kappa gamma and i was on a double decker bus on pledge day on like bid day when you find out you're in kappa kappa gamma and we loaded onto a double decker bus and i had no friends i was anorexic no one wanted to talk to me everyone hated me i was walking skeleton everyone was begrudgingly like even having me in their presence and honestly that's coming i don't mean and I was trying to make friends. No, it's funny. And I was like, I go, guys, I hope we don't go under any low bridges because then we'll get decapitated.

It was just like, not the worst. It's just like a cute little thing. I wasn't like, hey everyone, listen to how brilliant I am. I think I just said it like to some, I don't even know. And I remember this girl was just like, did you think of that? And I was like, I think, I don't even know. And I remember this girl was just like did you think of that?

And I was like, I think. I wasn't like waiting on it. But it's heaven floating. She was asking you that because she never thinks of anything. Exactly. What was your other weird joke about Walla Walla? Oh no, that was a Henry Phillips thing. There's a really fun game to

play. It's not fun at all. No, you didn't understand it. That's why I wasn't around i think i'm gonna love it okay so um i uh so the game is and i'll talk like henry phillips to deliver the line uh my friend and i uh we were at a house party and the cops broke it up and so we had um uh we had to climb over this oh no this is how you do it my friends you you create it let me just tell this racist you tell a story okay and in this story you act like you can't remember the name of the city you present the name of the city in an obtuse way sure but it sounds like you can't remember the name of the city then you the person listening to my story you offer oh is it

this city and then it sounds a lot like what i'm saying so here we go my friend and i were in this uh city in washington and the cops at a house party and the cops broke it up and we had to um run through our neighbor's yard and and and jump all over all these things um and it was in this city in uh in uh seattle no uh uh saint paul uh We had to jump over all these. Yeah, but you just say it, Anya. Walla Walla? No, Fensa Fensa. And we were, so you say, I did a poor version of it, but you just pick cities and then you

come up with a word that sounds like the city and make a story around that thing. Okay. Okay. So what's another? So you have to really do some prep work in your head yes yeah so it's like it takes a lot okay okay um okay god that's that's kind of hard that's the only one i remember the version of but it's a fun game to play when you're really bored and you know okay okay okay you got one um so yeah i i was uh trying to find a girlfriend at the time and i was um you know i i met up with this girl at this uh bar uh it was this place it was in ohio somewhere

cleveland uh no cincinnati no i really wanted to go out with this girl and uh no singleton no okay it's close no that's good no oh no singleton works because you were a singleton I really wanted to go out with this girl. Dayton? No, Singleton. No, okay, it's close. That was good. Oh, Singleton works because you were a Singleton. Yeah. Oh, that's good. Yeah, I wasn't Dayton. I was a Singleton.

That was good. Okay, so that's a fun game. I really just thought of that. I took you way off track. Sorry. No, I forgot what I was even saying. We got to go to break, and I'll come back with the ending to the Airbnb guy thing. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

The Daily Show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture. You get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment, politics, sports, and more from John and the team of correspondents and contributors. The podcast also has content you can't get anywhere else, like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines. Listen to The Daily Show, Ears Edition, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, we're back. Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. another where you're like what really chris today on his radio show i was listening to it they were talking about suits and he said that he has watched all of it which is fine you've watched all of suits right there are nine seasons of suits there are 132 episodes of suits my boyfriend has watched all of it and this all began because he was at an abu jabi for an abu jabi

and he met a girl on bumumble and they were like kind of flirting and they were talking about like shows they liked and she was like I've never wanted to watch Game of Thrones and he loves Game of Thrones so he was like okay here's a he's like really fun when he's flirting and like trying to get to know a girl like he's done really cute things I think it's adorable I love these stories but he like challenged her he was like you watch Game of Thrones I'll watch whatever show you think most people don't like but might that you love and she was like suits and he was like okay i think you're gonna like game of thrones a lot more than i'll like suits so he started watching suits and he loved it and he couldn't stop and he never even met up with that girl she definitely didn't

watch game of thrones but he has watched nine seasons of suits and so i'm in the car driving and i did get out my calculator as i heard this because i needed to confront him and i did 44 because an hour long show is 44 minutes sure times 132 divided by um uh 60 so hours and then divided by 24 44 times 132 times 132 divided by 60 times uh i mean uh divided by 24 okay i have a number and i said babe you've i go one i just wrote him out of context 132 suits I go four days yeah of your life has been spent watching suits

yeah that I listen I get it I've watched you know six seasons five seasons of Succession in a short amount of time I mean

it's not suits The Bachelor I've wasted so much time Kardashians The Bachelor Bachelorette Bachelor in Paradise have you ever

edited it up like that? Four days of my boyfriend's life has been watching suit. With shows like that, with like Bachelor in Paradise, you've got a double task. You've got to be like

cooking dinner while you're watching. I think he's doing other things too. How many cult documentaries robbed us of our lives? I mean, every cult I've watched,

every, every, you know what really robbed me though? i just had it on the tip of my brain it doesn't matter but man kardashians are robbing you you're watching all of it now can you give us it is good is it good i sent you a clip of chris kardashian or chris jenner that made me laugh so hard so is chloe chloe is so funny chris goes i i saw a clip the other day she was like there is an i there have been lots, I saw a clip the other day. She was like, there is an,

there have been lots of headlines written about me. The other day, there was one and the cover was Kris Jenner drinks alone. Drunk and alone. And I have to say,

what's wrong with that? It was just the funny, it was such a cute way. It reminded me of my mom so much. And she goes, what is wrong with that? She's adorable. What do you, can you just, as someone who used to watch the show on E a cute way it's that remind me of my mom so much and she goes what is wrong with that she's adorable what do you can you just as someone who used to watch the show on e and has no interest

in supporting their show on hulu for whatever reason because i just i don't know if i'm jealous i they're too pretty they're too it's definitely triggering at times i how so oh i mean it makes you start valuing looking like that. And it's just not a normal way to look. You have to have so much surgery and so many procedures to look. There's like superhuman alien. Like it's not a normal way of human faces. But I guess I'm wondering most people I talk to that watch it say they look

horrible. Like it's like, it's our people just lying when they say it's crazy the way they look. I don't want to look that way. And then you, or is it that is it that way? And then you start thinking it's like it's are people just lying when they say it's crazy the way they look i don't want to look that way and then you or is it that is it that way and then you start thinking it's normal yes you start thinking it's normal i like that this season chloe's really opening up about her surrogacy she had a child via surrogate she gets very into it and i think not nick you've talked about this like not enough people talk about the feelings around it what it even means

to have a surrogate or like who is it your egg or is it her egg I'm always when these bitches have kids I know it's none of my business

but when you have a surrogacy that's fine tell us if it's really yours and I know it shouldn't matter but doesn't it isn't that kind of I want to know just for myself

of a woman that like, should I put my, should I freeze my eggs? Because is this something that is that that easy to do? Or is it, and I just want to see if it's socially acceptable to not have your own egg. Because I really don't feel like freezing my eggs. Like, will people judge me and think that I don't love my kid as much as theirs if I do a surrogacy without my own egg? Why are people not telling us?

Because you can have a baby without anything to do with you a surrogacy just means someone else is having your baby that you will get afterwards but it does not imply it's your egg or not so i want about the man's semen it doesn't imply that either i want to know all of it just somewhat then why is that not just like adopting none of our fucking it's exactly it it's it's just adopting knowing it's like prepaying for an adoption it's a layaway oh you have the baby and layaway so did she talk about like bonding with it

yeah she talked about having trouble bonding with it and I thought that was cool because that's probably not a very popular thing to say or maybe it's a risky thing to say like I'm having trouble bonding with this kid and she's like it's just weird like you just all of a sudden one day someone hands you a child and you're supposed to

be like ah my baby and i thought that was cool that she admitted that she was kind of having some issues you know feeling close and i don't know i like that i've heard brook shields talk about wanting to murder her child with a steak knife that is what that is the most amazing thing i wasted four days of my life on that documentary when did that scene happen oh fantasies of murdering her daughter and like throwing her in this cracking her neck and stuff like that oh my god um through brooke shields because she had postpartum and she did not bond with the baby at all she wanted a baby more more than anything. Like as much as any girl, you know,

once a child, she finally has this baby and her husband, like husband hands it to her. And she's like, I feel nothing. This is in the emergency room and the husband's bonding with the child. And then he starts judging her and telling her, I've never seen,

look at all these mothers. They would go to the park. Look at all these mothers who love their kids. What is going on with you? And she's like, I just don't like it. I don't want it around me. It grosses me.

It's like, that's how I feel about my mattress. Disinterest. Yes. It's so similar. And so she, um, just give it four months.

He's going to put it in a dumpster. Um, right. Uh, no bed bugs on the kids. Um, was this in her doc? He's going to put it in a dumpster now. Right. No bed bugs on the kid. Was this in her dock? Oh, yeah. Oh, I missed that.

I think you were- I got to go back to pregnant baby. So did she ever- Yeah. Yeah. She eventually got treated for it because it was postpartum. So she was on medication for it. And then she started loving her baby? It didn't make-

Yeah. And she loves her child now, but at first she really did not like her kid and she felt so much guilt about it and then she was starting to have intrusive thoughts of like murder like homicidal thoughts that she would she was like i'd never do it but it was like crossing my mind to do it and it freaked me out because i would just be so jealous of mothers that in the same way that i get jealous of like things i wish i had like she was like i want to have that but i don't have that feeling at all and i don't know what to do about it and she went on oprah and talked about it and this was like in the mid 2000 2005 i don't know what we call the first parts of the 2000s we still haven't come up with a no odds or oh is that the

yeah that's the odds what are the tens the tens is what it bothers me we all have a word for that yeah i don't know we don't the 1910s is the tens so you barely is what it bothers me. We don't have a word for that. Yeah. I don't know. The 19 tens is the tens. So you barely even, we never even talk about that time. Yeah. World War I happened. Why can't we say the 20 tens? Okay.

We can. I like that actually. We can and we should. That sounds actually pretty good. I guess we do have a word for it. Donnie's just like, or can we call it the thing that we call it? But yeah,

it was the aughts when like postpartum was not on the tip of people's tongue and she went on oprah and bravely talked about this and then wrote a book about it and um i just thought that was so cool because yeah it's it's weird what people get shamed for there was you know shanae o'connor with her passing this week i saw on um red there was this post, like everyone in Reddit that is posting in celebrity things, including my own fan page, some of it's positive, but most of it's negative.

Like there's this whole thing where like, if you're on Reddit and you join a celebrity's thing to like write nice things about them, unless it's Taylor Swift, you're writing horrible things. The people just hate the things that they're fans of. It's such a weird thing that happens. But in this celebrity one that I follow, I think it's like called pop culture beat or something.

I forget what it's called, but there was a post of Miley Cyrus and they're always trying to call it problematic women. And he's problematic. These women are all so self fucking righteous. They all have husbands that cheat on them. They've all cheated on their husbands. They call out any woman who does it they villainize every single fucking woman they hate

every they love to hate people and find a problematic thing they did once and they're just the worst people i don't even follow it they just pop up but this one popped up of like guys is no one gonna talk about miley cyrus what she posted in 2013 and it is crazy what she posted in 2013 10 years ago right but she took a bunch of sinead o'connor's tweets that were like i need help i'm having a psychiatric breakdown ireland i can't i can't get medicine please someone help here's my email if you have meds i need it's just like was her pleading for help because she was having psychosis or a bipolar episode. And Miley Cyrus screenshotted that and wrote something like, we've got another Amanda Bynes

on our hand, like clearly mocking her mental illness. And so everyone's like, I can't believe Miley got away with this and that this is still up. And why would she ever say that? We don't realize that 10 years ago that she didn't get canceled for that. There wasn't even no one cared it was okay 10 years ago or not at least not um remarkable to mock someone's mental illness especially amanda binds i remember we were doing it on my mtv show when she was having that breakdown i remember

there was a little bit of sensitivity of like this mate we pulled back a little bit we were making jokes on my mtv show what did amanda binds do she was walking through the streets it was you know shoeless tattooing her face yeah she like lost her mind she was what happened to her she's now i think she actually just she just checked herself in again i mean this is an ongoing battle these people have like a what bipolar is if if it's not treated, is a terminal illness. Like, it's going to end in like, you know, a bad thing. So it's like,

and it's so hard to treat because they have to take their meds and if they don't, but then once they're psychotic, they don't want to take their, it's just so hard and difficult. But we didn't have that sensitivity that long ago.

But then someone contextualizes the, one person, thank God, came to Miley's rescue because it just seemed like Miley was just like cruel piece of shit.

Yeah. But Sinead O'Connor had just like a couple days before written an open letter to Miley saying after her wrecking ball video

came out of like, you don't need to sexualize yourself like this. You are being a sex slave to these men. I mean, it was kind of a crazy and I'm using that term

in an impolite way, but it was just someone who was unwell trying to protect another woman who's been you know she pimped out she says you're pimping yourself out you're being pimped out and so miley was just like fuck you bitch and she was she was retaliating to that and miley was a child at the time um of course but it is just so interesting to me that that that string of tweets she still has them up you know like it wasn't on anyone's radar to go miley this isn't nice mocking someone's mental illness yeah she had a huge pr

team at the time and no one clocked it imagine what we're doing now that is just then though it was accepted because we had like those gossip blogs like perez hilton and what would taylor durden do like all those like gossipy things that love to make fun of celebrities in that way. I mean, Britney Spears. And Paris. Nicole Richie. All of them. Lindsay Lohan.

Her shaving her head and looking through the window at someone filming her doing it. Her beating up that car with an umbrella. We were all front seat for it and it was so bad and now we're a little bit more sensitive to it but I'm reading Sinead O'Connor's autobiography right now

if she didn't have a mental illness it would be shocking with what she went through in her childhood it is like I cry about like my parents like sometimes when I would cry they would be like stop crying deny your feelings

her mom used to have her i mean trigger warning for horrible child abuse um used to beat her with a broomstick on her private parts and make her splay out openly naked on the kitchen floor when she was like four five six like and beat her in her privates till they were black and blue and she would have to go to school the next day. And she had to lie. And she had a really kind teacher who would be like, did your mom do this? And she would just go, no. And she said her teacher would just look at her like she knew,

but she couldn't do anything. Yeah. And I mean, she suffered grave abuse. Like if this person wasn't unhinged, it would be impossible. And it was just, it's so heartbreaking. Anya, i know you were a big shenate o'connor fan did you know about how horribly she was abused as a child i don't think i did i think i might have read that or heard that years ago but i have not read

her autobiography oh it's because it's really good bell i was like i think i knew that oh my god like the way kids are abused i just i mean it's, it's just, it's the, you just are happy reading it from, I mean, obviously I'm reading the point where this person is likely taking their own life. I don't think it's been confirmed or anything, but it made me feel like, okay, at least she's out of that. She's like an adult now and survived it. But like, you just, it's just the, and her mom was so sick. It's just so heartbreaking that she was like a laughing stock

and she was right the whole time after she tore up the picture of the pope like that was the bravest thing to do and everyone for years she was just like the butt of jokes and and she lost her whole career doing that yeah she lost everything and she said she doesn't regret it which is really cool but she tore up no one even knew why she tore up the picture of the pope people were like what is she doing why is she not like the pope she hates she hates the church in which you cannot hate the catholic church yeah but she was protesting the crimes against children in the catholic church that she how was she privy to that never uh disavowed those priests and never disavowed the what was happening but did we know it was happening

in 1992 clearly there was something in the news but based on the the movie um spotlight sure it seems like that all broke in 2008 i'm sure it was covered up more than it was in the 2000 in the 2000s but it must have still been out there yeah I think it was an issue that just got swept under the rug. But yes, I think it was an issue. I mean, coast to coast AM, alien folks. You know, we were talking about the Pope being an alien and child sex trafficking of the Pope way back in the 90s, for sure. Really?

It was a fringe belief. That he's an alien? That the Pope is, you you know the pope is controlled by satan or reptilians do you believe in aliens aliens oh of course but not uh not the ones that aoc is uh interrogating that navy guy for this weekend what there was a congressional hearing about ufos oh right we're right um those are probably not aliens but of course the vastness of the universe there has to be There must be intelligent life out there. They just can't reach us.

Or maybe they have. That I don't believe. Yeah, I don't believe that either. I don't believe they reached us. I don't believe they either have the technology to reach us, or if they tried to reach us, we wouldn't understand how to analyze that communication. Do you know the dark forest theory? No.

No, I don't know anything called the dark forest theory. Okay, I thought you would, you probably know this. I know what it is, but. Well, you know about it, like we should stop looking for them. Oh, because once they find us, they'll kill us.

They'll kill us immediately. It will be a split second of like, it'll just be like if they saw a gnat, like if you see a gnat and you're just like, ah, the second they notice us, like us with a gnat in our room, they'll

just go stop yeah because they won't even think of like let's explore this and see what we can learn from them they'll just be like ew if they have the technology to reach us there is nothing that we can do to stop them yes because we don't have the technology to reach them they've been trying to reach us forever we are just too dense to get it. That's my theory. But if they could reach us, that means they have technology that is so beyond our understanding of anything that they would have the ability

to destroy us immediately and would. They don't want to destroy us. They're kind. They're not fucked up like us. I doubt it. In order to have in order to have the amount of natural resources to control a machine

that could take you to a place you have to be evil you have to be harvesting multiple solar systems worth of natural resources I think they're so evolved that they're like

beyond our fucked upness we're just destroying ourselves like a bunch of idiots like fucking with the earth and like ah who gives a shit which is what happens when you seek power and seek to like expand your power you need evil and so they would probably be evil if they reached the point i think would be the argument but final thought speaking of evil airbnb good so because you asked some important questions expanding evil

and needing more and more so this billionaire i'm like he tells me about the founding of it and then i was like um i go so you i go can i just cut to the chase i was like you are one of the wealthiest people that has ever walked the planet and will ever walk the planet probably because he also told me that for every 1500 that is spent in the world globally one of those dollars is going to airbnb oh my god wow it and it's i did not understand how because he was speaking in like a way i don't understand about business but for some reason airbnb is not something like you know amazon can be reproduced by other places because it's there's some reason that airbnb is not is proprietary in the sense that other other nations have to use airbnb

because they don't want to for some reason china can have their own amazon and you know um dubai can have their own amazon but like airbnb it's this it's the biggest american like company that is globally and is not um it is you can't recreate it that's true it's everywhere now right and he said that was by mistake he did he was like we're just lucky that it's that way so then for every that means for every dollar 50 spent or like you know 15 spent one cent is going to air bb which is another way of saying that in math uh 132 hours of suits okay so then i feel like you're just bragging about your math abilities now because i didn't know that how much is it for every 150 million dollars 150 million how many 15 million dollars wait 15 million dollars yeah so that's 50 um it would be hold on don't do this to me i'm really

panicking and i need to write it would it be 1 million 15 million no no no it'd be hold on don't do this to me I'm really panicking and I need to write it would it be 1 million 15 million no no no it would be 10,000 I have no idea someone knows

and someone's yelling at their phone right now so then I said I go what's the point of anything anymore like what

do you get up in the morning for? That's a good question. I go, you can have anything you want. You could buy anything you want. Any nation, you have as much. He's worth, I looked it up, $11.8 billion. Wow. He himself?

He himself. And he splits it with two other dudes? Yeah, but they don't have as much money as him i looked up their names too okay um he's the most i don't know why but i said what do you what keeps you going and he's like because i just like innovating and i like creating new ideas like it was you know he had a good answer for it he was like you know it's like i like building and he's really i've been on his instagram now and he's very proactive about like building community and connecting people.

And he has, you know, he's friends with Obama and I think Obama is a good guy. Like they're working towards good things. It seems. Um, and then I said, well,

what about, this is where I think I derailed it. I was like, what about the, like saying that there's no accidental billionaires, which, what do you think that means when someone says that? That means that they had to do something cruel and unusual in order to garner that much.

Or at least exploit their workers. Thank you. That is what that means. But everyone in the room, including Jeff, Jeff's friend, and no, Jeff's friend actually had my back, but he was just like looking at me like, I have your back. But I go, you know how they say there's no accidental billionaires? And he's like, and everyone's like yeah yeah you gotta try and i'm like i don't think that's he goes i

go do you do you you seem like a nice guy like are you are you evil and they all go why would you ask that and i go but that's what that phrase means there's no accidental billionaires you had to exploit um you know low-paid workers to get to where you are you had to like employ slave labor essentially i read that quote first with rihanna about like she is making money off the backs of people working in sweatshops like you don't become an accidental billionaire without exploitation but they all have to baffled by it like that's not what it means it just means you gotta try it i'm like yeah i don't think someone finds a billion dollars on the sidewalk like whoopsie oh i'm an accidental billionaire of course it takes effort that is implied what i mean is are you evil and then it just got kind of

weird and i changed subjects as quickly damn i didn't want to explain it i didn't want to have to explain it but they made me explain like what i was saying was like are you evil but i had to say that to him like well how did you recover from this to make them out of your friends i think i i think i just uh said like i i don't think that you are i and i have a billionaire friend who i don't think is evil but i'm i'm wondering where that's happening in your company like how did you get that who's losing out like and we didn't get into it i just steered it away to like wow it sounds like this relates a lot to comedy and then i don't know but then we walked out together and he said to me he was like thanks for asking so many questions

i was like thanks for answering them he was like people don't usually ask that much and then later on i saw scared yeah but i wasn't like why the guy doesn't hit on you so glad you asked yeah this is why you're maybe not dating a billionaire no i think he was if anything are you an asshole i think if anything it buys me something because i was not intimidated and i wasn't like he was just he was an i was, it's so cool to meet you. I mean, this is, I'm never going to meet someone richer than him. I don't think. I looked at the list.

He's very low on the, let me just say he's like in the hundreds or maybe even higher than that. Pathetic. I know. Because there's people with like $326 billion. So he's with his 11 point, measly 11.8. But he's on the Forbes list of richest people. And I had to scroll a lot you

know like i was putting in my birth date in a thing so i had to go to the bottom to find him but on the way out he was just like thanks for asking and he was like and then he said this he was like i could never do what you do and i go well i clearly never do what you do and he and i was like but it is he was like and i'm a public speaker and but like make writing jokes and making jokes i have no concept of that and I was like it's cool that I do the only thing you can't do

and the only thing you can't pay to learn like there's I hold something that you can never you can literally have anything

that you want I mean you can have AI write movie scripts for you but they still can't really do comedy they can't write movie scripts either

really? can I ask you this so why was he there? was he friends was friends with a friend of jeff ross jeff ross always has the most interesting um celebrity like interesting cool um tastemaker friends that are like hanging around and then so i ran into jeff ross later on like at my next set at the improv and avery his friend walked in and was like that that was awesome. And I was like, wasn't that the fucking coolest? We got to talk to a multi-billionaire. And he was like, and you really didn't hold back.

He was like, when you asked him, what's the point of life? I mean, that was ballsy. And I was like, but what is it? And then Jeff came in and was like,

you, he was like, you fucking Charlie Rose. He was like, you, that was amazing. And he was like quite the interviewer. And I was like, you got to take advantage of that. He was like, you, that was amazing. And he was like, quite the interviewer.

And I was like, you got to take advantage of that. He was like, no, it was a great conversation. And I just liked that they gave me credit for that. And I felt a little bit like, almost the way that I felt when,

that we were talking about before, I forget what I said. Oh, when I said that I'm in my latest 30 and everyone laughed and I'm like, why is that funny? It's nice when you get feedback about a character trait that you didn't even know you had that brought some people some joy.

Because I would have done that in a bubble. I wasn't doing it for any other reason. I wasn't like, I'm just going to be different and maybe he's going to like me more. You're being yourself. It was just the way I am. You're unfiltered. Yeah, it was nice.

The cool thing about you is you're unfiltered but you never seem to get in i'm probably wrong but you don't seem to get in trouble for your unfilteredness well because i think if as long as it comes from a place of not trying to hurt people i can kind of if i do offend i can back out of it and i feel like i'm always on asking things and then 5.5 seconds later I'm like oh you shouldn't have asked that because that's hurtful like I don't realize it's hurtful till later like

a second later yeah but then you can just go I'm sorry that was rude and I wasn't thinking but I am curious but most of the time people do want to talk about why they lost an arm or why they're in a wheelchair or the obvious thing that everyone is avoiding oftentimes if you ask it in a couth way i mean don't say that with personal ways to have what are you living for but like you know but you really wanted to

know like what is if you're in your shoes what gets you up in the morning like if i was a billionaire what and i was you i'd have trouble getting up in the morning now and like having a reason to take on more work when it's like, I don't really need anything else. As long as I can afford to get Starbucks three times a day and Postmates every night of the week, I don't really, and maybe send my nephew to college. My niece doesn't look like she's going to go.

But like, as long as I'm able to get that stuff done, what else is there to life? And so maybe I was kind of seeking it in that way. But the point of life is making podcasts with your friends. And that's fun. And that's why I do this, not for the money. And so I think that's what he does it for. Like he enjoys what he does, which is refreshing.

And that's how I connected to comedy. And that's how I'm going to marry a billionaire. Okay, guys, thank you for listening to the podcast. We will be back next week. And yeah, don't be cut. And just ask the questions you want to. extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show, ears edition, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.