The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #402 Name Nikki's Special, The Magnet Theater Thrives & Satirical Headlines

Episode Date: December 27, 2023

Sometimes, you gotta hit the snooze button—until it's time for podcasting, of course. Although Nikki is loving pilates, she had to take the morning off. The quest for the perfect name for her special and tour continues. Can Reductress headlines provide the spark of inspiration?  Brian shares his insight on the Magnet Theater in NYC. Nikki is not the only member of her family that was an answer on Jeopardy. They take a close look at Bill Cosby and his questionable enthusiasm to "Come on People." Nikki talks about her vacation plans. In the Final Thought, Nikki and Brian talk about seeing Jimmy Carr perform and spending time with him backstage. - Subscribe to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts to get this episode ad-free, and get exclusive bonus content: https://apple.co/nikkiglaserpodcast    Watch this episode on our Youtube Channel: The Nikki Glaser Podcast Follow the pod on Instagram for bonus content: @NikkiGlaserPod Leave us your voicemail: Click Here To Record Nikki's Tour Dates: nikkiglaser.com/tour Brian’s Animations: youtube.com/@BrianFrange More Nikki: IG More Brian: IG More producer Noa: IG  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late-night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Here's Nikki. Hello, here I am. Welcome to the show. It's the Nikki Glaser Podcast.

Here with me today are Brian and Noah. What's up, guys? Hello. How are you, guys? Hello. How are you? I'm tired. Oh. Well, I'm out of it. I'm still, you know, I just woke up.

Like, I was supposed to wake up two hours ago, get a workout in so I could, I have a really long day and fit it all in. Oh, my God. But I just kept hitting snooze, baby. Just kept hitting it. Too ambitious. Going back into those dreams, wanting to finish them up. Just having dreams of eating my breakfast.

Which is such a waste of a dream when you do something in your dream that you're about to do. Yes. I had a dream like that just tonight also, or this morning. I dreamt that I was doing this podcast. No way. But I dreamt that the podcast was being recorded in my kitchen at home

on Long Island and that it was you and two elderly women. Not elderly, but maybe like in their 50s or 60s. Okay. And I was late and I was so late that I decided I'm just not even going to be a part of this episode and I'll do

the next one. But then you kept trying to bring part of this episode and I'll do the next one. But then you kept trying to bring me into the episode and I kept going, no, no, no, it's okay. I just won't say anything. Whoa, boundaries. I know. Yeah. What does that mean? Don't know.

I don't know. It means that you need to put your foot down about something probably. What? Maybe with me, maybe not with me. Maybe the old women represented. Wait, isn't it always supposed to be that whatever is in your dream like the the thing that is coming at you is actually you and you're i'm the old women yeah like you a lot of times people are like i fell in love with this guy or what there was this there was this dog in the dream and it's like the dog is you like most things in the dream

are you i don't know but also no one knows fucking anything about dreams, really. No. It's all just guesses. Yeah. And, yeah, I wanted back in, though. Like, I love when you wake up and you're like,

I love setting my alarm for super earlier than, like, with all my ideas. Like, sometimes I do wake up in the morning, I'm like, oh,

I can get this workout in. Like, the first thing is like, oh, yeah, I want to work out. But this morning, I woke up and I go, what the fuck was, why did I set this so early? And. I'm like, oh, I can get this workout in. The first thing is like, oh, yeah, I want to work out. But this morning I woke up and I go, what the fuck was... Why did I set this so early?

And then I was like, oh, yeah, well, fuck that. And then I just tensed up my muscles to see if I still had the abs that I've worked so hard for. And I did. So I was excited. And then I was like, I don't need to do a workout this morning. I've been going hard recently. Yeah, you're post special now. It's time to let loose.

Now it's time to let go. I did a two a day on Monday because I just felt like such garbage. When you come down from a special, it's like coming down from a drug. And so I felt like I needed, I went to the, yeah, I went to the lesson and she was like, maybe I already said this, but she was like, you know, just making comments about like, oh, we're a little out of it today. Or like, she just had to keep reminding me what foot. Like she said the other left probably 18 times.

You know, and it got to the point where I just said, will you touch the leg it is? Because I can't even understand what left is. Like I couldn't figure it out. I wasn't with it. So then I was like, I only gave half for this, which is all I had to give. can't even understand what left is like i couldn't figure it out i wasn't i wasn't with it so then i was like i only gave half for this which is all i had to give so i gave a hundred percent but it was just not good so i said i'll go to a class later on and then the class later on only had

two people in it so i got like a semi-private um two times and then um also can you come up with some new material like the other left you do it eight times i think at that point you should say something else. It's not even funny anymore. She's not saying it to be funny. It really is what they say to get people to do the correct leg. That's when you know you're really dumb. But they're very forgiving.

That's what I like about Pilates is I have yet to have a coach that makes me feel stupid about anything I don't know. And I feel like I have had a lot of trainers in the past in other ways that when I go, what are your obliques? What's a trap? I don't know where the traps are. I think I do. Is it like this area? I just don't assume. And they don't go like, okay, well, your traps are

up there. There's no condescension even though I would think pilates is the most condescending of just the word i'm sorry i've become obsessed with pilates like the people i hate that do pilates that talk about it all the time but once i now i get it i get it i'll shut up about our all uh i'm eating crow now about how people talk about all the time because when you do something every day you you tend to talk about it, no matter what it is. Sure. That's great.

Because before you started, you were just kind of like dreading it. Yes, so much. And dreading, just dreading someone focusing on the things I can't do well. And now I'm starting to do those things easier. I couldn't tell in the class if she, because the class was by someone who I had never trained with. So it was a different instructor there that I had never worked with. And I couldn't tell if she just gave up on correcting me or if I was doing it right.

Do you know what I mean? But I have a feeling she just gave up. Not to gave up, but was just like, she's not my client. I don't care if she does it perfectly. And I realize a lot of times, I love my two women that um i work with there and they are nice enough to not make me like you have to like really um like you have to put the bar up then you have to put the thing down and then you have to you there's all these like

techniques of like you have to sit on the pilates chair you have to get in pilates stance then you have to put your arms like a genie and then you have to sit down and i realized that we don't do a lot of that bullshit and i thank you to my girls for not making me do that bullshit um and i know that's probably not the way like we we do sometimes they go this is the right way to do it but we're not gonna do that today so we're just gonna we'll learn that pilates stance like intro to it later and i like that because i don't like there i don't need another thing that i'm doing wrong right let's not add let's just keep it as simple as possible and then we build from there and um i feel like i'm gonna get them in trouble by saying that they don't because like i know it's it sounds like they're customizing it for you which is appropriate

respecting the art yes and i like wiping down my thing afterwards i really like that yeah you like wipe oh Yeah. I like wipe. Oh, yeah. Like I like like I'm done with my class. I clean up my station. I feel like a little bit of a kindergartner. I've never learned to clean anything after I'm done with it. So it kind of feels like I feel so accomplished. I feel like someone should be like, great job after I wipe down this dumb thing.

Because I feel I've never been rewarded for cleaning in that kind of way. You need like Dora the Explorer Pilates. Yes. You did it. Yeah. And now we're going to get into this pose. But do you remember back in like the 90s early 2000s? I guess it was more like early 2000s stand up when Pilates

was like a joke when people would make fun of Pilates. It was almost like Ford Focus or a Prius or like it's a punchline. It was one of those punchlines because I just make fun of pilates it was almost like ford focus or a prius or like it's a punchline it was one of those punchlines because i just think honestly it's because it was pilates and then people would say what is it pilots or whatever that would be one angle that these comics would take and it was always to represent some i don't know pretentious uh woman or something and stand upup. Do you remember that? Those days?

I do remember it when it fell on the scene. And I remember a girl talking to me about how Pilates changed my body. And me and my friends would make fun of her. Yeah. She would talk about it all the time of like, it transformed my body. And her body was already amazing. So it was like, she's a model. It was like really obnoxious to hear on top of that, Pilates had changed her body um but yeah it does change your body

because you're like stretching everything all the time you get really long I have obliques for the first time I didn't know what obliques were um and I have it just on one side I don't have it on the other it's very exciting yeah I had my mom feel my stomach the other day I was like tensed it and made her like punch me in the stomach. It's just like, I'm not doing anything with this body. I mean, yes,

I am. It ended up, so I started to do Pilates because I wanted to like look great for my special, but my special ended up having a physical thing element to it that you will see when it comes out that required an intensely

strong core that I did not intend for and that I would never we kind of wrote it kind of in the last weeks of preparing for the special like I don't want to give it away but yeah beginning of the special it's a pretty big theater and Nikki

comes in on a trapeze swing she swings in I'm not going to say How she dismounts Because that's really The impressive part But she swings in She's about 25 feet

In the air Swings in It's not far from that The microphone's up Closer to the ceiling So she's got to grab The microphone But the real surprise

Is going to be How she dismounts From the trapeze Yes That's the funny part I'm in a plank On a trapeze Yes And's the funny part i'm in a plank on a trapeze yes um and then i do a half of the specials in a handstand um and would i slowly lower down to um middle splits um by the

way did we ever figure out what the name of the special is going to be no it's still not named no i never name them before but now it's over you filmed it i know i well we don't know what's gonna make the cut wow so yeah we don't know i know it that's insane people are like what's your special name and i'm like i don't know i don't this is the kind of celebrity i am i'm not good at planning things i just like go i i free ball it man I just go I'm doing a photo shoot for my next tour And today For four hours And had a call with the photographer

My assistant just wrote me about it Everyone's asking What is the name of the tour So we can like make the photo shoot About the tour And like what kind of poses do you want to do and i'm like i don't know i don't i just want to name it emma like a baby or something like i want to pick like so easy to name a child but a tour that has a whole attitude and and i don't know what i'm

talking about yet yeah you know like i just got done making a special like i'm not taking out the material i just shot on tour i'm i'm building a new act and so i don't know what i'm gonna be saying and i don't and i don't want it to be like it's in music it's cool to be cool right uh-huh like when you're a musician it's cool to be like i'm doing the badass tour yeah and i'm cool but in comedy you can't say i'm cool i'm getting rammed up the ass tour or whatever it's always got to be like my tiny dick tour yes or i'm you know i love tom segura's i'm coming everywhere tour i love that one it's always got to be some it's got to be a joke degregate degradating yeah um that made me think we should you should name children once they're 13 because if you name them when they're zero, that kind

of influences. Like if you named your kid you know the... But what do you call them until then? You don't know. But then when they turn 13 you go... So there's some cult that ascribes to this. Now that I've seen you, I know that you're a Dylan. Right.

That's so insulting. You're a Dylan Well, there are Dylans that are adorable. Yeah, they have their hair parted in the middle and it's right down to their top earlobe. And they look like Ryder Strong. So they're Ryder or Dylan. Yes. Okay. So if you named your kid Striker or

something or Parker, then they're going to be a certain person. It's just going to influence them in some way. But whereas if you wait until they become an asshole, then you can name them Parker. It is interesting that people become their names. Oh, you're a really nice Parker. No, Parker seems like a nice person.

I'm just, you know, I think Parker sounds like a rich person. Yeah, I mean, not my Parker. Yeah, you can... What if they have a man? Is it a woman or a man? It's a man. Okay.

So, you know, let's think of a different name then that nobody knows. So I don't offend anyone's friends. Oh, I know someone who parked their car yesterday and they were a Parker and they were nice about it. Yeah. It's. No, I was just randomly plucking names. No offense to Noah's friend Parker, who I'm sure is a saint

and has no negative qualities. Yes. Well, yeah, we all do. But I think I see what you're saying. Like, what would happen if the name came later? Like, what kind of person would you be? Because you kind of become your name. Noah is totally a Noah.

Yeah. Well, who knows? If she was named, maybe she became a Noah. But she became, that's what I'm saying, she became a noah because she was named noah yeah yeah i don't think her parents were like she's a noah i think she turned into a noah i think your name does dictate the kind of person you become not fully but also they say birth order does something but then that was recently debunked that birth order really does is like nothing

even though it's such a popular meme to be like i mean i get targeted constantly of like i'm the older daughter i have autism adhd and no one loves me like i get everything i see on instagram is targeted towards me of being like the firstborn everything fell on me Everyone's an alcoholic around me. I couldn't manage my temperament. No one sought after my feelings. I played alone. It tries to make you feel so seen about your childhood, but it's so off in many ways.

People love it. You see all of these likes. I get to see everyone who's fucking struggling when I look at the likes. Anyone who ever likes one of those posts, All of these likes. I get to see everyone who's fucking struggling when I look at the likes. Anyone who ever likes one of those posts, I get to see all the people who are like, yes, I feel seen. There was a reduct...

Chris sends me reductress. We're big fans of reductress on Instagram. Reductress is great. The Onion, but for women. And I think it is written by all women. It was started by two women at the Magnet Theater. Two performers from the Magnet Theater in New York

City, which is an improv theater. Really? I thought it was definitely an offshoot of The Onion. It's not? No, no. It was actually pretty wild at the time when they started it because of The Onion and some other things. It was like, is there space for this? And it just, it blew up. They never looked back and it was amazing

um this one chris sent me and i felt bold i mean the women who do it the only thing that i have a problem with with the onion hard times news reductress and what's the other one there's tons of them these like fake news things that are hilarious. I want to know who wrote them. Give me an author. I want an author. I want to credit this joke so I can be like, this is,

I want to be able to write the person on Instagram and be like, that was so hilarious. My friend, Bobby, Bobby Jaycox, he said he, he wrote me a, like a bunch of stuff that's going cool in his life.

Cause we share that stuff. And he said that he had just gotten a headline through on Hard Times News and I was like fuck yeah which one

and sometimes Hard Times News uses a picture of Ian because they always make fun of punk culture and it makes me so happy Ian Finance yeah

it's kind of like when restaurants pool the tips so like when you think you're giving your waitress the tip. I don't like this socialist bullshit. I want to know. Capitalism.

I want a meritocracy. I want to know who did what and I want to give credit. Because sometimes, I don't, you know what? I also don't like it on shows where they go, it's the opposite. On TV shows, they'll be like, written by blah, blah, blah. And you'll be like, this is an amazing episode. And then you realize, that person's episode was touched by everyone else.

It wasn't just that person. And people at home, like my mom or dad, are like, well, she wrote that entire episode. And it's like, no, she didn't. She did the, what's it called? The breakdown. She did a lot of the work, but then it becomes, it's the staff.

So it's the opposite actually certainly i want to know the authors of the onion i want to know who these people are i want to and that you've never seen anyone take credit for an onion thing you've never i've never seen a comedian friend of mine be like i gotta think through on reductress why aren't they allowed to tell people when they've done this i think they are told by reductress and by the onion that you are not allowed to post which ones you've done, which is dumb to me. Who cares?

These are unfounded conspiracy theories. I've seen people post that they've written a Reductress. Oh, you do? Yes. Really?

Yes. Okay. Well, then Reductress is doing it right, but I've never seen someone, I've never seen it before and I would like to see more of it

because that is, I mean, maybe I'm just a little like baby boo-boo who needs credit for everything. I've seen the creator of Reductress post a Reductress title and tag the person who wrote the title.

I love it. I love it. I just haven't seen it. And I apologize for calling out Reductress if they're giving people credit. But I would like a tag on the post itself. That's right. What's the harm in doing that? We need authors on things.

And I think Reductress Lady would probably tell me, well, that one actually was a lot of people and then uh and then okay maybe don't tag that one lady says reductress lady needs to put authors on things right now they're so good though they keep doing whatever they want because it's i would say nine out of ten of their article headlines are hilarious this one i loved it said nice this woman achieves, so now she thinks it must not have been hard. Must have not been hard. I loved that one. That one speaks to you. Yeah, Chris sent that one to me. Does that one not speak to you, Noah?

No. Really? Well, it speaks to me about you because you say that all the time because you think that what you do is easy, but it's not. It's hard. But it's easy for me. So it is easy in some way. Like, you know, I think any, there are some people that can play guitar just really well and it just like is who they are. Like they're just born like, yes, they put in hard work, but they pick up a guitar and it's just like easier.

But that's why it's not easy because they put in the hard work. No, no, no. Some people are inclined to do things better than others. There are some kids that sit down at a piano and they just kind of like, I know what an E and an A. They just have perfect pitch. They were born with it, baby. But then they work hard on top of that.

It's limited though. They have to get practice and education and stuff to expand their knowledge. I will give myself credit, but I won't give it because I wasn't born with the brain that made me work hard. That wasn't my choice. It just is the way I got it.

I'm lucky. I'm not gifted. God doesn't love me more than he loves people that aren't. Maybe it's because you're named Nikki. Nikki is a name, I will say, that is kind of splashy. It's kind of fun. Yeah.

I haven't met many Nikki's you don't like. You might meet a Nikki that's annoying, i.e. me. I might be a little overbearing sometimes but a Nicky will be someone that is like happy to see you has a good smile maybe is kind of a bitch I think I'm just describing myself

but like Nickys are different than Nicoles you know like if I switched to Nicole it just wouldn't fit you'd be like who is this this is like horoscope stuff because like do you know like if I switch to Nicole it just wouldn't fit you'd be like who is this? This is like horoscope stuff because like do you feel like you're

you have stuff in common with Nikki Haley the Republican running for president right now yeah like white teeth and kind of like blinky you know like kind of like always looking like let me look pull up a picture of her N-I-K-K-I or can you be like Nicki Minaj also or Nicki?

I don't even know how many Nickis. Yeah, Nicki Minaj is a C-K. Listen, I will say this. Every time I meet a Nicki, I go, how do you? She goes, I'm a Nicki. I'm like, oh my God. And I go, how do you spell it? And then if she says N-I-C-K-I, I go, oh, I love it.

But I don't. No, no, no. That's how I am with Bryans. B-R-Y-A-N Bryans. Not, I don't like. Well, you're just, I'm not a B-R-Y-A-N Bryan. I get offended when people say B-R-Y-A-N. That's because I don't surf or skateboard.

Right. If you're B-R-Y-A-N, you are on the beach. You are wearing a puka shell necklace. You've got a Harley hat. It sounds like it was your choice to change it to B-R-Y to me. It sounds like your parents gave you B-R-I and you in high school were like, my friend Lauren in high school changed her E to a Y. Like Lauren Hill.

And we were all like, no, that's not who you are. But it sounded like Brian with a Y sounds like a choice. What about Robbins with a Y? I don't hate it. My mom. They don't change for me. My mom's name is Karen, which has been very difficult for her for the last several years. I bet.

She's a white lady named Karen, but her name is spelled C-A-R-Y-N. That's not something she changed. Okay, yeah. Well, not now she isn't. She's like, it's different. Yeah. You spelled my name right on my Starbucks cup. That's right.

She's like being a Karen about being a different kind of girl. I want to speak to your manager about how my name was spelled. Okay, that's really interesting. Okay, I have a lot more to say about names, and we'll read through some more Reductor's things to see if we relate after this. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment

to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Um, can I ask about your mom's name? Like, is she truly like Feeling discriminated against?

Because I've read so much about people Named Karen and how it's like They really, some have changed their name Because it's just Such, yeah, it's so negatively Connotated now. It was really surprising for me Because when it happened Because everyone was like, Karen, people are like

Mad at Karens all the time I wonder how it started and I was like there's gotta be an etymology of it I didn't know what it meant and then someone was like that woman was acting like a Karen and I was like she made you pizza bagels isn't there like a rude lady and her name was Karen

and that's how they started it no I don't think it was based on it just sounds like the white lady of that age group It's like a 40 to 65 year old Name for a white lady Yeah Karen Could have been Susan

Could have been any of us At any point in time one of our names Could get sucked up into the negative machine You know everyone made fun of John and Kate Plus 8 That hairstyle was the Karen hairstyle And I think her name being kate kind of influenced it kate's not a good enough name to be like you're a kate so they think they think they chose something close to that based on the hairstyle from john and kate plus eight is my guess can i just say though that nikki haley there's can't be a president Nikki. No offense to me.

But that's not a president name. No. It just ain't happening. Maybe president of the cheer club. Yeah, exactly. But Nikki is, yeah, I guess Nikki is a, it's a prostitute name. It's a stripper name. Cheerleader name.

And I say that with love. I am saying that with, I'm glad that I have that kind of cool name. My mom always said that she named me Nicole in case when I became a professional person. Like, so I would go by Nikki. And so Nicole was on my birth certificate when I became a lawyer or a professor.

Um, and it never happened. Um, it's actually been a huge burden on my life to be named Nicole on every document. Um, and it not be, but it is my real name

but what does that even fucking mean it's just on some papers but literally no one calls me it except Sherrod Small what's sad for me is that Brian which is my name in case you didn't know has become one of the names comedian use in their act outs to

indicate like it's like a funny stupid name and then Brian said it's happening more and more and outs to indicate like it's like a funny stupid name like and then Brian said it's happening more and more and I don't like it yeah Stacy Brian's become another name oh yeah Stacy you're in the comedian bucket I think Brian yeah you are

Brittany Stacy there are certain names I go to and I go where did I even come? Like no one I know has named that name. I just picked it in the act because it's a funny sounding name and it kind of, and certain names do personify exactly the thing you want to say. Like I had a joke in my special where I said,

Aunt Gail, I don't have an Aunt Gail. I know Ian's mom's name is Gail. So maybe that's, I just picked Aunt Gail is a funny picture what she looks like and I don't have one but for a while I was saying an uncle's name

that I actually have and I was struggling with that because I was like why can't I pick a different uncle because it was a really dirty joke about wanting to have sex with your uncle and I kept saying this uncle that I do have and it became a part of the joke I'm like why do I pick a real uncle's name for that and people would laugh and I'm like why and it became a part of the joke I'm like why do I pick a real uncle's name for that and people would laugh and I'm like

there's literally thousands of men's names and I can't but I do have many uncles because my mom has 10 kids in her family so it's Nancy, Jim, Michael, Julie, Tommy, Peggy, Chucky, Sally, Mom and Dad Nancy, Jimmy, Michael, Julie, Tom or Peggy, Chucky Sally, Patty, Mom and Dad or something like that. Which one is

TV? Bobby Nancy, Jimmy, Michael, Mom and Dad or something like that. Which one is TV? Bobby. Nancy, Jimmy, Michael, Julie, Tom or Peggy, Chucky, Bobby, Sally, Mom and Dad. Yes. Okay. Bobby. Thank you. Wow.

Noah. TV Bob is Bobby. Whoa. And then I have two on the other side too. So it's a lot. But yeah, names are cruch. Oh, wait. Let me go back to Reductctor stuff because i think i want to um yeah i want to relate to more because these are so good and wait so it was they they came out

of what improv uh school well they didn't come out of but yes they were one of them was a teacher at the improv at the uh magnet theater in new york city which is the improv to do with like the magnet schools because those are like gifted schools. No, no, no, not at all. It was basically like the third tier theater in New York City. They came up third. It was the Upright Citizens Brigade, which was like the alpha dog. And then it was the pit. The People's Improv Theater was the second theater.

And the Magnet came out third. And the Magnet's whole deal was they don't care about the industry. They're not interested in making people famous. They are only interested... Maybe that's why they don't share the names. They are only interested in being a community where people can go and practice improv. Whereas if you wanted to be famous, you go to UCB and then somewhat you go to Pitt. We know how many people came out of UCB and then pit like Kristen Schaal came out of

and others. Magnet, nobody came out of or it seems like nobody came out of. There's like a few people. I think I did a couple shows there. Yeah, but it was a good theater and then hilariously. And then I go, they're not going to make me famous.

I got to get the fuck out of here. But that was the whole point. Famously, SNL did a sketch where they had a black box theater one-person show they were making fun of. And they chose the Magnet Theater as the setting where they would film this sketch

as a lame, uncool, black box theater. And in the Magnet Theater, the bathrooms are very close to the stage. So when you're on stage doing improv, occasionally you can hear a toilet flush. And then someone comes out and they're like,

you know that they just shit or piss in there. Where was the Magnet Theater real quick? 29th Street between 8th and 7th Avenue. Oh. Oh. Yeah. And so because of that. Wait, is it still there?

No. Well, that's the end of the story. Because of that, SNL added that into the sketch where they're like, and also you can hear the toilet flush from the stage. So it was just kind of embarrassing. When you went to the Magnet Theater after that SNL sketch came out, was everyone talking about it in the bar area? Like, yeah, they made fun of us this weekend. A little bit, yeah.

But here's the thing. Did you buy into this whole thing of no one wants to be famous? No, and that's why a lot of people... I don't want to be famous, but that's why people disliked me. I performed at the Magnet. I was on six different house teams at the Magnet while I was in New York. But I was on so many house teams because I would be on a team and

my team would get broken up. People didn't like me there so much because I was doing stand-up and they felt like I had an air of superiority I think because I was like, I'm trying to actually make it. Whereas I think if you wanted to be part of the crew there, you had to be like, we're

separate from that. We're not trying to make it. We're just want to hang out. I would love to see how many famous people would still be doing the thing that they do if fame were not a thing. If money and fame and influence were not the rewards of the labor how many would still do it i think it's many yeah i don't think it's all but i do think that is a bad business model well here's what happened because our society is obsessed with fame i get that but here's what happened

covid happened covid happened and the the UCB theater shut down. The pit shut down. Guess which theater is the only one that didn't shut down? Maggie. The Magnet. And it's because they were based on a community of people who all just wanted that place to survive. And it still exists and the other two are gone. Whoa, it still exists?

Yes. Okay, I eat my words again. Crow. So they were right. I mean, all they needed, they, they, they. That's why your mom loves you. They survived the pandemic because of the community and because it wasn't just like, well, I can't be famous here anymore.

So I'm going to leave. No, it's a nice, it's a nice idea. And I, I always wonder like, would I I I do think that a part of the appeal I mean stand up it's absolutely part of the appeal is that you get immediate attention and love for what you're doing in front of a live audience I was being interviewed

yesterday by someone in Denver because I have two shows coming up in Denver December 30th and December 31st New Year's Eve Eve and New Year's Eve at the Paramount Theater so excited for those shows haven't been Eve at the Paramount Theater. So excited for those shows. I haven't been back to the Paramount since I shot my last special there, Good Clean Filth. So I'm glad to go back and not have to do a special

and just be done with my special and doing new fun material. Plus stuff I shot in the special that's I'll be freer with now. You can see the trapeze act. Also, halfway through, Nikki climbs up on a 25 foot ladder and she stands on this platform and underneath there's a big uh pool of water that she dives

into i won't say what tricks she does to land but it's really amazing oh yeah that's the surprise of it yeah the tricks i mean how many that's it's really an incredible special. I've never seen anything like it, honestly. No, the ending did require so much core. It was so ironic because everyone goes, how did you do that? How the fuck did you do that ending? And people are marveling at it. And I go, Pilates, yo.

I never would have been able to do this thing that we ended up writing, not because I could do it. We were just like, what if you did this thing? And I was like, let me try try it no one who doesn't do pilates could have done that and i'm not even that good at it because i'm not that good at pilates but it was it was just ironic that the thing i did to have like a fucking cool body was really in the end about having the strength to do this final thing that i did and that's the excuse that's the excuse you have to say it's like well, well, I'm not doing it to look good. I'm doing it because I require my body to be able to perform the act.

Yes, yes. But I do want to look good. But it is about feeling good. It's about feeling strong and feeling solid and not wiggly, jiggly and all my joints are just like It's nice to feel compact

and like everything is coming from your powerhouse because if you do Pilates everything comes from your powerhouse. Literally you move your toe from your abs. It doesn't make any fucking sense. It still doesn't to me but she'll be like your ankles move your ankles from your abs.

I'm just like what could that even mean? And I don't think even you know what that means. And I don't even think that is actually physically possible. I think this is all theory, which I also do like because a lot of it is mental.

You just have to think about it and then it happens. It's a lot like singing. It's like you have to picture the thing. Like my voice teacher yesterday was like, keep the sound in front of you in this little bubble.

And like suddenly when I pictured the sound in a little bubble in front of my nose the sound didn't fall back in my face because i was just visualizing this thing that's not even real um so wait what was i just gonna say about you're gonna you're talking about an interview that you did yesterday oh yeah i did an interview yesterday and so thank you and so the guy was asking me about um you know he had all these prepared questions it was really sweet it was um you know he had all these prepared questions it was really sweet it was adorable actually and he had one that was like you know what's the difference between different mediums that you you know perform in on tv and stand up and podcasting

which one is the most gratifying and which one which one satisfies you the most and i'm like i do think that the why stand up is so special is because even though podcasting is so fun and it's laid back and I don't feel the pressure that I feel with stand-up where everything has to be so on and there's nonstop hilarious. And I just feel more myself on a podcast, which is just so nice for all the reasons that that is nice. It's like the first class of performing. You're just relaxed um but stand up you do i don't hear people listening to this podcast right now going oh my god that's so true you know like i mean i hear you guys but you're also on the podcast you don't hear people that have no stake in it letting you know like you're right we like you oh my god that's so true and so yes thank you so

that's why stand-up is great and we all know that like that's why stand-ups do it but i i think we forget that sometimes that that's what stand-ups are after is that immediate feedback yeah and i just don't believe anyone does stand up that isn't insecure and i have no problem saying i'm insecure even anya anya doesn't like to hear the word insecure she i think she grew up with a mom who said um like it is so sad that these girls are insecure it's just so sad when women are insecure so anya doesn't like to be categorized as insecure because i'll say it all day that i'm insecure i'd have no problem with it it's just it's kind of i don know. It just is the way it is. It doesn't.

Issa Rae. Oh, yeah. Issa Rae. Common crossword puzzle answer. Issa Rae is like, oh, yeah. Very common crossword puzzle answer. She had a show called Insecure. Issa Rae is in the New York Times crossword puzzle like every month.

She's in it as much as Agara. The capital of Ghana. Yes. in it as much as agara the capital of ghana yes and and uh a man a man named uh blank a tom hanks film auto oh god yeah or or mining or for mining uh gold or whatever or a tribe a great plains tribe oto oh god enough of that shit. Enough of Otoe, man. I'm always putting Opie in there, and it's not right. Opie, they always, they will, because isn't, Hopie is a tribe, right? Yeah. So I get Otoe and Opie.

I always put Utes. U-T-E-S. Oh. The Utes of Utah. No. Etna. Volcano. Yeah.

Common crossword It's getting out of control Anyways It's out of There are some times That it will be Three days in a row Of the same clue

Oh yeah Where you'll get There's other ones too That happen all the time And Bowen Yang was in the Crossword puzzle the other day And I got very excited

And I sent him a little message You were in the crossword puzzle too Yeah I was in the crossword puzzle You almost had the egot Of clues Because you were in Jeopardy And the New in the crossword puzzle too. Yeah, I was in the crossword puzzle. You almost had the EGOT of clues because you were in Jeopardy and the New York Times crossword puzzle. Is there any more that you could be in? I said the,

no, I don't think there's any more. What about a trivial pursuit card or something? Or like a Wheel of Fortune. What would be the EGOT? Yeah, Wheel of Fortune would be cool. And I wasn't that cool because I did Wheel of Fortune this year and my name was one of the clues.

Oh, yeah. It was one of the things even though I was Celebrity Will of Fortune. It almost still counts. The weirdest thing about that Jeopardy thing, so my name was used in one of the

questions, not questions, but I guess answers. The question was, what is Blind Date, which was a show that I hosted that I literally forgot I hosted. Well, that was Jeopardy, wasn't it? Oh, sorry, Jeopardy. So on Jeopardy, which was a show that I hosted that I literally forgot I hosted. Well, that was Jeopardy, wasn't it? Oh, sorry. Jeopardy. So on Jeopardy, it was like, if your friend set you up

on one of these, also a show hosted by Nikki Glaser, you might want to not turn it down. And it was like, what is a blind date? And Chris and I were watching it because someone texted me. The first person to text me is colin donnell i think he was actually one of the first people to text me about the crossword

puzzle too and it was a sunday crossword puzzle so colin donnell is a smart guy he's watching jeopardy he's watching uh he's the cross puzzle colin donnell he is on chicago fire chicago hospital hospital chicago one of those shows He's a big deal Yeah He's a big TV star Yeah But he was I went to high school with him

Oh cool And yeah He's awesome And he He was like my first date I didn't know it was a date But we went to see Bare Naked Ladies

Chicago Med He's on Chicago Med Chicago Med He's a very handsome man Fire country What was that? Chicago Med Chicago Fire

There's a lot of them There's a whole Chicago night Yeah there's a lot of those I'm sure he does cameos on the others. I'm sure it's a whole community and it's very incestuous in terms of them starring

in each other things. But yeah, he's up in Chicago in that fire or that med. And, but yeah, he sent me a thing.

It was like, holy shit, Jeopardy. And I was like, I was with Brian on a Zoom call when I got it. You were the first person

I told because Chris was down getting our Uber Eats and I was like, Brian, oh my God, I'm on Je i'm on jeopardy so cool we were both like oh my god let's find it so we went and watched it and then chris came back in was like wait what what is that what's the answer to this like he couldn't even answer the question my parents were both like wait what and i was like yeah i hosted blind date i was like the voice for blind date deep cut a deep cut deep cut who wrote that no isn't that where jackpot came from jackpot came from that word because i was like it's a blind date jackpot and emile and andrew were at the voiceover for it and i kept saying

and they were like then we went nuts with jackpot after that and that is why andrew collin has jackpot tattooed on his arm to this day I can't wait till what he does to cover it up someday and I love what he I wonder what he says when people ask uh what it's about I just love that he has to tell the story but the actually the puddle tattoo is a funnier story that he has to tell um but anyway so um so then my dad texted me Four days later And was like You're not the only family member Who made it on Jeopardy

Who made it on Jeopardy this week What? Let me just play it This is so nuts Sorry for this pause Who is this other family member? That's why I go there's no fucking way like what how could that happen and this brings us back to names too

sometimes you can see this green sometimes called lincoln green for the trees my nephew's whole name much like my whole name was in the show how often does forest green get said i mean yes my it's not that big of a coincidence it's not special it's not destiny there's no signs from god all right all right forest green is a color that my sister choose i think it was you know what nikki i think just for the sake of interest, I am going to go full hog on Destiny. I'm going to be the Destiny guy now. Full hog.

It was Destiny. You're the fourth member of Destiny's Child. Yes, that's right. Prosperity. Yeah. Oh, you still want to pull up that Reductress article? Yeah, I found one that i relate to let's hear it it says inspiring that's i love the ones that start with like nice or inspiring

i love it i think they did too the first time i saw it i go i don't know what this is but then i now i'm bought in i love things like that into that into the i love it i love things where you at first go, what the fuck is this? And then you buy in hard. Oh yeah. This is always my point. When people go, what is this?

And I go, there was a time where Tom Hanks, you go, who is this? You know, everything takes a second to let it in. Our first reaction when something is new is always like, oh. Yeah, and sometimes it never works. Everything is Tom Hanks. Tom Hanks was new to you

at one point you saw him for the first time and we're probably like you just don't you're not born knowing everything and being used everything so let new things in your life i have to remind myself sometimes because i go why so okay this was it says inspiring this millennial works hard so the previous generation can have a better life and it shows this woman like with her grand like with her parents and i relate to that uh but i like working hard for my parents yeah you know what i there was a moment at thanksgiving where i said to my dad that i feel like your generation is the um uh your generation just took everything and like you're the generation of using things because they like ruin the environment

blah blah blah and now they're all like enjoying their retirement and we're kind of like we can't even own a home um or pay our student loans and then i saw my dad just feel really bad and i then i felt terrible because i was like well i want you to enjoy your life i mean i i saw i i don't like saying that Their whole generation is bad Because my dad would like nothing more Than to provide for Our generation I don't know I just wanted to say that

And it's not his fault We would have done the same thing If we were born in that generation I love my dad and I do not blame him for Climate change That's nice of you Brian Okay another one was uncle has weed pen this year it's like for for christmas it's just a man with a strong point of view pointing with a weed pen um yeah they're always funny they always um they always make me i just love when someone can

nail something so specific that you're like whoa that's that's so mean. But I can't believe that Noah, you've never felt like something you get credit for when people are like, good job. You're just like, well, it was not that. It's like, comes easy to me. I don't, I can't believe you don't relate to that. I've definitely felt that. Okay. You have. Okay. But I don't, um, like, I guess I don't really like, I don't like, I don't diminish what i do because it comes easy like i know that it comes easy to me because i've done it for so long and i've suffered a lot to get to the point where it's where it feels easy gotcha okay yeah that's so you don't focus on how there are people that are probably doing this thing that you do better than you because they did work hard you don't focus on that more than the fact that you know i focus i focus on um my

annoyance for people who think that it's easy and who think they're all that and that they can do what i do when i do it well that's interesting because i don't give a fuck about that like when people are like you know have a special and they got it before they were ready for it, I just go, it's not going to be good. The proof will be in the pudding. When people get things, I don't really get jealous unless I think they're going to knock it out of the park because they work harder than me. Then I get jealous. But if they get it and I know that they're going to flub it and either not ask for the right help to get them to the level they should be at or they're going to just be bad on their, you know, just not work hard enough on their own. Yeah. I just I'm like, I can't wait to see that.

No, it's bad for your career. It's bad for your career anyway if you have a special before you're ready. I mean, it's just because then you go up there and it's bad. And then people are like, oh, wait, I guess this person wasn't as funny as I thought they were. Yeah. You shouldn't do it. Yeah. But it's but how do you turn that down?

You can't. I mean, that's the other. Yeah, you can't. So I also don't get when people when comedians talk about like, I can't believe this guy got this thing. I'm like, was he supposed to turn it down? Yeah. Would you? Yeah. Like, sorry, this guy got this thing i'm like was he supposed to turn it down yeah would you yeah like sorry this guy's popular and like humility maybe they can have some humility and you can't have humility in this industry if you want to make it you're gonna have to put

yourself out there you're gonna have to go out topless if you want to make it well that's what chris told me i should do is a topless yeah. And I'm like, that would have been good two years ago. I need a lift to do a topless special. And it'd be so distracting. And then the theater might get hot, and then your nipples change. It would just be

too distracting. It would be like when the color changes on the background when people have a mood shift. Do I have a topless billboard for banging? Remember? Yeah, it was like kind of. It was like my whole body was covered up. It looked as if I was naked,

but I wasn't obviously. Enough with the gimmicks. You need to stand behind the fact that you go on stage and you ride a unicycle while juggling, flaming. I was going to say like my, there's a couple of gimmicks

and there's just one gimmick in this special, but it's fitting, and it's funny. All right, let's talk about my, what I should name my fucking tour when we get back, because I really need some help. Maybe it's called my fucking tour, but then radio stations can't talk about it. And it sounds like I'm mad about it. I'm not. I'm so excited. Okay, we'll talk about my when Funkin' Star Wars comes out. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show,

and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed?

Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, we're back. I just want to say that we recorded this before Christmas. That's when we're not talking about Christmas yet, but I'm guessing I had a great Christmas. Me too. Yes, I'm guessing you did.

You're going on a trip soon, aren't you? Yeah, I'm going on a trip. That's what, yeah, we recorded ahead of time because we wanted this week you yeah i'm going on a trip oh yeah that's what yeah we we recorded ahead of time because we wanted this week off and um yeah i'm going skiing um before my shows this weekend in denver the 30th and 31st i'm jealous yeah it's in denver and so then i'm going skiing before that in beaver creek look for me if you're out there i'm gonna be sloshing down the blue slopes maybe getting a one black diamond mostly blues i can't wait to be on chairlifts i can't wait to be sloshing down the blue slopes, maybe getting one black diamond, mostly blues. I can't wait to be on chairlifts.

I can't wait to be. Oh, you're going to be so strong for skiing from Pilates. Dude, it all worked out. I'd be so nervous about the ski trip because I really, I'm not even going to say what I don't want to happen because I'm not going to manifest that. Like I'm manifesting strength and just like, I just want to have those moments going down a ski slope and thinking I need to do this more in my life. This is the happiest I ever am is going fast down a blue diamond safely fast and feeling so strong and confident and having the wind whipping

in my face and feeling perfectly warm, but also cold at the same time. It is the greatest feeling known to man for me besides like orgasms and stuff like that, or finding out someone you hate, something bad happened to them. That and orgasms. I don't even know which one's number one. I actually am not someone who revels in that stuff that much anymore. You ever jerk off to something bad that happened to an enemy?

I could. i probably could i like when someone just like has a flop of a thing it makes me so happy when someone puts out something that it's like so not funny it just when someone has a when someone gets a cartoon and then it just sucks and then it gets canceled after one season they didn't deserve it only they didn't deserve it oh i love that i love the amount of people who have had this feeling about all the things that I have done that aren't great that have been canceled

is probably a lot. Also because I do it so it's probably happening Well, then people are doing it to you. Yeah. So you got to do it back. You got to give and take

but then you just got to succeed. I used to have the thing where someone would say I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy and I'm like that's the dumbest phrase. I would wish Your worst enemy? Yeah, people say that. I like, that's the dumbest phrase. I would wish. Your worst enemy?

Yeah, people say that. I mean, that's a turn of phrase, you know? But of course you would. Your worst enemy. The person you hate the most in the world. You wouldn't wish that Hitler would have a stye on his eye? Like, come on. They always say it about something small. It's so, yes, exactly.

You wouldn't wish that Donald Trump's flight was delayed three hours out of LaGuardia? You wouldn't wish that donald trump's flight was delayed three hours out of la guardia you wouldn't oh that's crazy um i think i would i would i wish horrible things not i wish them on people but yeah i mean that's what a lot of like i yeah i guess that's what my um i think maybe my tour should be like called likes or Bad Person or something like The Unwanted Thoughts. I know that was a Maria Bamford special. It's so hard to come up with something that hasn't been done by another comedian, too. Yeah, you can't call it bad because that's Michael Jackson.

I can't call it Arras. What about Thriller? You can call it Thriller. That's true. I could do Thriller. Man in the Mirror? Yes, like woman in the mirror Okay let's do a spin

I would like to do I could do like a take on a Taylor Swift Tour Yeah well no you can't because Joe Parra Did it Errors tour Yeah that's funny That's pretty good There have been compilations of all the times she fucked up

On the Errors Tour and it was called the Errors Tour And she fucks up like one time Every 18 shows And it's like the cutest thing ever So she's flawless The Perras Tour is funny because Joe Perra Could not be more opposite to Taylor Swift Than he is

So it would be less funny for you Because you're much closer to Taylor Swift Than You're too closer to Taylor Swift than... You're too close to Taylor Swift to have it be funny to name your thing after a Taylor Swift tour. Yeah. I mean, I'm trying to think. There's Lover. There's Folklore.

There's Evermore. There's Speak Now. Fearless. Fearful. I don't think people would take that. People wouldn't connect it Yeah And eras

There's no other like You know I wouldn't feel like I was stealing from Joe Pera If I did a rhyme with eras But yeah It's just There's nothing there

I really don't know What to do So far All of your specials Have been Kind of plays on Sexual terms You've got banging

Well no you have perfect That's not necessarily But it's based on So you have All of your specials have been kind of plays on sexual terms. You've got banging. Well, no, you have perfect. That's not necessarily, but it's based on, so you have, you have banging, perfect.

And then you have your tours to the good girl tour. And one night with Nikki Glaser, also kind of a sexual connotation, like a one night stand. Yeah. You're not safe with Nikki Glaser. Yep. You had good clean fil Nikki Glaser Yep You had Good Clean Filth

Unprotected Raw Dog Come On Come On Nikki Glaser Well that's Come On Nikki Glaser Bill Cosby's book is called Come On People

Oh no way Come On People Yeah Let me just make sure it's Bill Cosby Come On People That's so funny And the book looks like It looks like Come Oh, no way. Really? Come on, people. Yeah. Let me just make sure it's Bill Cosby. Come on, people. Yeah. That's so funny. And the book looks like, it looks like cum.

It looks, it's like white. Let me see. Make sure it's Bill Cosby. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. Maybe I need like a phrase. Okay.

What if it's like, okay, what? You've got to see Noah or somebody. Can you pull up this picture? Yeah, please. And just hold it up to the camera. It's called Come On. How could it look like cum? I so i am telling you it looks like come i have to find this uh hold on i got it um it's called you got it noah yeah you have the actual

cover that i'm talking about though i believe the original blue is it yeah it's blue all right all right show it okay here we go. Here we go. Drum roll. Yeah, here it is. Sorry for people at home. This is on YouTube. You got to go to youtube.com slash Nikki Glaser podcast. Look at that.

Oh my God. It's called Come On People. I mean, does that not look like little cum droplets? Wait, wait. I am so confused because it's not even come on. Come on is come on people is C apostrophe M-O-N. You guys, this is cum C-O-M-E on O-N people. Well, cum is still C-U-M. By the way, I know, but there also is no comma, which is come on people.

No. This is come on people. Come on people. And then it's a blue cover. It's a blue cover. And then there are footsteps It appears The footsteps are white

But they look like Droplets of come And then look at the subtitle Look at the subtitle On the path From victims To victors Yeah

What the fuck He's saying something There's a path So it's like Footprints that look like Little jizz droplets Yes And it says

Each droplet has a It it says respect on it. The other one says caring. One says hope. One says skills. Yes. One says Spanish fly. That's how he views his cum. Disgusting.

What? I mean, in plain sight. And then the co-author is Alvin F. Poussaint, which kind of sounds like pussy but also i mean alvin if you're named alvin of course you're gonna co-write a book with bill cosby it's inevitable where's that guy today you know yeah um okay brian you wanted to bring up something that happened yes um so we didn't talk about how we went to go see Jimmy Carr at the Moore Theater the night before you're taping. Yeah. Bad idea.

Final thought. Bad idea. Because he's so good. It really got in my head. I got a little bit, I got thrown. Yeah. Because I'm in the same theater. I'm shooting my special at the next night.

I'm watching Jimmy Carr's show. I'm comparing comparing contrasting i'm you know that's pretty much what i'm doing the whole time is like i can't even laugh because i'm so angry that i didn't write all those jokes and that i don't i that i just couldn't i couldn't relax i couldn't have fun because i was so in my head of like he he's so good. I'm such crap. Like it was, it was not good for my self-esteem. I will not do that next time. I will not in the theater of which I'm taping my special, go see someone who's been doing it. You know, I would guess at least 10 years longer than me. I will never do that again. I will go see someone

who's been doing it 10 years less than me so i can feel superior but uh it was an amazing show there's no question yeah you should just go see me at the theater before you know you're amazing um you're really really fucking good i mean um but yes that that was uh that was my takeaway was like an unsettled feeling after that of like it's too late to change anything i can't be more like jimmy car i could have seen anyone and been like i need to be like that person you know i was so in my head the night before doing this you could have seen jeff dunham and even be like i think i need puppets i think i need i that's so true i it really could have i could have gone either any way that way just someone who has been in the business longer than me who just um yeah i just compared myself to and

so i was i was a little spirally after that moment. So while you were comparing yourself, I mean, I think the takeaway for me from Jimmy Carr was first of all, you know, he obviously gave us free tickets and we went and we sat in great seats and we watched his show and he was also, I hear,

incredibly gracious. His team was incredibly gracious, allowing your team to go into the theater the night before to set up everything. And so he was amazing. But the takeaway for me

was when we went after, we went to the Green Room and we met Jimmy Carr and he was so nice. He was so cool. And he was making eye contact with not just you. He didn't put all his focus on you.

He made eye contact with everybody. Which sometimes people can do. Yeah. He saw saw all of us he respected all of us we all contributed to the conversation he was so kind to you and so it's such great things to say about you and just was awesome and i actually liked his stand-up more after i met him in the green room because he was so cool in the green interesting yeah yeah i knew he was that nice so because i've met him in the green room because he was so cool in the green room. So interesting. Yeah. I knew he was that nice because I've met him obviously a lot of times and I've been a fan of his

for so long. I mean, there's just I think he's one of the best joke writers of our time and just what a polished and perfect performance. Yes. Flawless. Flawless. Even the new jokes that he says he writes new jokes for every single show

And at the end of his show he reads them off a piece of paper To test them every show And even his new jokes felt like Are these new really They were so good It was so much stuff that I loved So I was trying to think of He had one joke I don't want to ruin anything

But he was just talking about He has a lot of good jokes about um i liked his chunk about date rape um and i liked his about saying like it's you know it's like he pretty much takes this kid in the audience and he asks this kid like a younger kid he was 19 years old like when is it okay to have sex with a girl like when is she consenting and he walks through like a whole date night of like when when like when is it okay to have sex with a girl like when is she consenting and he walks through like a whole date night of like when when is it is it okay now and he's like no it's not okay yet like he's and it really is like he he brings up a point of like how women will have sex a lot of times just out of like i've already gotten this far like i don't really want

to i'm saying yes but my body is saying no he like literally gets into that of like if her body is as tense as your dick is hard that is a no even if she's saying enthusiastically yes that's not enthusiastic her body and i'm like well what if it's my obliques what if i'm just like a fucking rock hard because i'm working hard um and that was really funny and i mean he had too many jokes that i could even Every time I would be like remember this one It would be replaced with a new one That was so fucking good And a lot of stuff about pedophilia Which I loved A lot of stuff about

Yeah just sex and Relationships Yeah what was your take away Brian From his set Do you remember any stand out moments I mean my favorite part of his set was when he started telling a personal story about his baby being born

because it was a departure from his usual stand and deliver, like set up punch. I would like to see more of that from Jimmy Carr. I want to see an hour where he's like talking about his life. That would be cool because I know that he can infuse the same number of jokes

into those personal stories. And then I also get to learn more about Jimmy Carr. Which is why I was saying after we met him, I like his stand-up even more because I got to know the guy. Whereas when he's just delivering really quality jokes,

you don't get to know him at all. But then when he delivered that story, I was like, yeah, this would be cool to see like, who is this guy? More about him. Yeah. Well, I saw a clip of him last night,

actually on Birbiglia's podcast, where he said that there was a girl who came to a show and she was celebrating her second lifeversary or something. It was something like, I was going to kill myself this day, but I was waiting until my parents fell asleep so I could do it when they were asleep. And while I was waiting for them to fall asleep, I was on YouTube.

Can you imagine? I'm waiting to die and I'm just going to pull up YouTube. That's the kind of thing that fascinates me about life is that you do these mundane things when you're getting ready to do something so insane. Even like we're getting ready to take my special, not that it's in comparison to taking your own life but like like backstage like talking about like oh peanut m&ms

or whatever like you're just talking about something mundane right before you do something big or but she was watching jimmy car clips as she was waiting to kill herself and then she started laughing and then she watched some more and she kept laughing and then she like kind of didn't want to do it anymore because she was laughing so much and she said that she was celebrating um 20 or you know 15 years or whatever of being like her second half of life and i just thought that was really cool and wow he seemed very moved by that i the exact opposite happened with someone who's who was going to kill themselves or was actually going to live and then they started watching Marc Maron clips and then they decided to kill themselves. There are so many people that can't tell that

story to him because he's they're gone now. Yes. Yeah. His special I like what is the title of his I'm not saying that Marc Maron's a bad comedian. I'm saying that he will he's the depressing comedian. Yes. And that he's that's what I like about yes. Mark is that he's just like

Things are bad as he sits on the stool Like a little gargoyle And I liked the name of his last special I forgot what it was I think it was Lil Gargoyle What is it? Oh sorry Lil Gargoyle

No shut up Brian I heard your dog joke End times fun? No I'm suppressing a lot of anger always. No. You sound like ChatGPT. We should ask ChatGPT to name my next special. Can we do that? Yes, of course.

Or name my tour. Oh, that's good. That's a good way to end. I would love it. I wonder if I can still do ChatGTP because they have now upgraded it to... Okay, hold on. I'll try to log in. I just need help.

Peeking? Maybe it should be. I just need help. That's what my... You know how you can do like... Cry for help. You can do Instagram. On your Instagram,

you can now leave notes on... Do you know about the notes? Where it's like in your your instagram you can now leave notes on you know about the notes where it's like in your messages you can now leave a note and it just says like a lot of people use it to like plug their tour which is a little silly uh so like you respond it responds to the person right away if you go into instagram and then you go into messages on the top of above all of your messages above where it says primary general requests, there's like a bunch of circles of people's profiles and above them is

nowhere isn't little notes. Not for me. And so like my friend Dwight Simmons is saying Indie Thursday, Dayton Friday and Saturday. And then Jai Yung Summers is saying 1221 LA, 121 New York City. Right. And then Jai Yung Summers is saying 1221 LA, 121 New York City.

And then my friend Shaq Stanley has just put a Mariah Carey song up there. So I always put in my note, please help. Period. And that's just what I put every single time. And occasionally people message me and they go, are you okay? And it's just what I put every single time just in case you

want to message me that. Okay, okay. I get what you're saying. I like the idea of saying like someone help her or like Nikki Glaser, a cry for help. Nikki Glaze. I just don't know what I'm going to be talking about. I'm always talking about the same shit.

Like my life, my observations on life. Like I don't have this like overarching, like I'm telling it like it is yeah i don't want to do it like a phrase like can you believe these people like i don't want to have it be like a quote but i also had this idea of peaking was it was a title there was also this like turning point something that has to do with it being a turning point for you where it's like this is an inflex point where you are this is kind of like you're you're turning that age where decisions have to be made and things are going to change from this point

forward and all aspects of your life and your career what about like balls to the wall or like some kind of like like because i think or like a tits out or like i can't say tits though that's the problem that is always the problem you can't say you can't say tits but like some kind of like I don't care anymore like something that says that of like

no I don't want to I want to do this I'm excited to be here but I'm not like like you know six years ago

zero fucks give it like you know what that like that kind of thing but like not that I think I'm not like, you know, six years ago, zero fucks given. Like, you know what that kind of thing. What about bare naked lady? Cool. Oh, you really like that one. Three stifled ooms. Oh, actually, speaking of naked, I have some exciting news to talk about on the show tomorrow that I will share because I got an email asking me to do something that I've been wanting to do a while. And besties who've been listening a long time might know what it is, but I finally got the call and she ready. She ready.

See, she ready is a good title. So would you be willing to take be willing I almost said Whitney Houston Sorry Tiffany Yes So besties Can you write to us What do you think Nikki should name

Her next special Please God I might actually like Ask them before this Because I really need to Pick a special name Like today And today is actually

A week ago So I might put it on Our Instagram story Because I do need help Yes Is that lame of me As an artist to not be able to come up with? Yeah. No.

Taylor Swift would never do that, but maybe she would. Who knows? She just like knows. Taylor Swift knows what album she's going to put out nine years before she does it. She's a mastermind. If Taylor Swift did do that and you contributed to it and then she used a piece of your contribution, how good would you feel? That's true.

That's true. That's true. Listen, I'm not Taylor Swift. I got to do it my way. Oh, my way. My way or the highway? Nikki Glaser. My way. Lil Gargoyle. Lil Gargoyle. Don't you throw that in again. Okay, we have to go. Thank you for listening to the show this week. I hope you had a Merry Christmas. We'll be back tomorrow with more

podcasts. We love you guys so much. Don't be c- And just name my special for me, please. I don't know what to call it. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late-night legend Jon Stewart

and the best news team for today's biggest headlines exclusive extended interviews and more now this is a second term we can all get behind listen to the daily show ears edition on the iheart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts