The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #445 I Think I Have a Dog? Nikki's Mom is in Studio, Fostering Dog Stories, Dancing for the Devil, Power Wash Time

Episode Date: June 12, 2024

Nikki is joined by her mom, Julie, and a new puppy (fostering, but maybe forever?) Brian chimes in about algorithm talks and how it doesn't exist or is even real. Nikki talks about her upcoming guest spots on The Masked Singer (sadly, she isn't one of the contestants...bummer). The three discuss John Wick and the artistic interpretation of Donald Trump. Nikki gets into the documentary Dancing for the Devil and the sketchy business of a pastor taking advantage of dancers' wages and endorsements. Murder and pedo docs must rot your brain, right? Final thought: Julie got a power washer. Subscribe to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts to get this episode ad-free, and get exclusive bonus content: https://apple.co/nikkiglaserpodcast  Watch this episode on our Youtube Channel: The Nikki Glaser Podcast Follow the pod on Instagram for bonus content: @NikkiGlaserPod Leave us your voicemail: Click Here To Record Nikki's Tour Dates: nikkiglaser.com/tour Brian’s Animations: youtube.com/@BrianFrange More Nikki: IG More Brian: IGSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late-night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, here I am. It's the Nikki Glaser Podcast. I'm Nikki Glaser. Brian Frangie is with me. Hi, Brian. Hello. Hey.

How's it going? Long time. My mom is also here. Long time. Short time. There's a dog there, too. There's a dog there, too. Yeah, there happens to be a dog here, too.

Yeah. Oh, my God. What's that? I think I have a dog. I'm like 95% sure this is my dog. This is really just fostering right now? Well, I just wanted to try it on on and and i was like it's a good foster life like i'm i'm providing a service yeah this dog is waiting for a home even if i don't if

i know if i decide it's not a good fit yeah oh so you can return this dog yeah oh it's because someone she's still she was very she had a lot of applications for her my friend natalie the reason i have this dog let's just get to it is that um my friend natalie who uh is from mayday rescue who's been on the podcast before she um has been on the lookout for another dog for me because she got marion and luigi for us right and she's just she just good is good at matching people with dogs and isn't just trying to like offload dogs she wants to find a good place yeah and she said she hadn't felt this way about a foster that she was taking care of since marion and she always marion's like been one of the loves of her life ever since she had her so she was like i'm getting marion vibes i think this dog is special and i want you to have like the first chance to have her so i met her and it was fine like it was like

a first date that you're just like okay like this could work if i work at it but it wasn't like there wasn't this moment that you want where you're like we just both knew i mean like she's right not love at first sight and she's so sweet and she's everything like just in the size wise and just demeanor wise and then obviously you know that you'll fall in love or you don't and i would be totally fine giving her a better home if that's what she wanted. But I think we both... How are you going to know? Well, I think... I just...

I think I just know. Because I'm getting... But how are you going to know if she wants a different home? I can just tell if she's happy. If she wanted a different home, I would know. You would. I feel like I knew with Marian and Luigi, that's why I was like,

I can't have these dogs anymore in New York. It wasn't a good life for them. No, I get that. So I know when a dog's not having fun yeah last night she tried to sleep under the bed and i was like are you not do you not like want to be in bed with me and chris like is this this because this is part of the deal girl is that i want a dog who sleeps in my bed and is i can wake up in the middle of night and just go oh so cute and like put my face in her fur and be like i love love you, cute little thing. And I do that to Chris's back now because there is fur

there, but he's thinking about lasering it. And so I need something else for it. But yeah, I just want a dog in a bed and she was trying to hide under the bed, which is kind of a move of like a dog that's scared or doesn't like what's going on. So I was kind of investigating. It's brand new. Yeah. And she's used to like

hiding out because she's a little stray that was stuck on an island for five days. An island? In LA. Brian I have to show you the video of it because they have the footage of her being rescued and it looks like. I'll have you watch it right now and just tell people what you see. Oh my god that's horrible.

They snared her with a literal like butterfly net. She tried to escape the island because they watched her for five days. She was on the island and starving. That's fucking terrible. We got to see this. It's terrible, but it's... How old is this dog?

Two. She thinks two. And how did they know? Two. I guess they had reports of her or something. Well, how can anyone see this? No, you're just going to watch it and tell us what you see. Okay, they're on a kayak and they're heading

towards the island. There actually is an island. Oh, and she's trying to run away because she's like, who are these people? Oh, they snagged her with a big net. And she's in the water, snagged. Yeah, she's flipping around in the water.

And it says sometimes animals don't know that we're trying to help and they get scared. Yeah, so we have to be patient with them. And then they put her in a little life jacket

and she just looks so scared. Oh, she's scared. Yeah. Her eyes are bulging. This was like a week ago. This little thing, if you watch on YouTube,

you can see how docile and calm she is. She was snared on an island alone. In some kind of, oh, it's a, people are going to say, stop holding her like that.

Floating apparatus so she doesn't drown. What do they call this? Life jacket. Yeah. I already talked about this part. So then she's... I already talked about this part.

So when you say island, you mean like an island off the coast that's like just a little tiny shit island that's got nothing on it? Yeah, like a thing that's from drought. You know, like it just gets... It looks like it. It's a little patch

that gets, submerges? No, what's the opposite of submerge? Emerge. Float. Emerges, yeah. Oh, yeah.

There's, seems like there should be some nautical term for that, like, though. That sounds more watery. Okay, well, you know, it does look like,

it's just gonna keep repeating and you won't realize that you're seeing the same footage until the fourth island Goes through Yeah Little brush island Isn't that funny

When you watch a thing And you realize sometimes That it's repeated And you don't know it yet I'm sorry it's right there Nikki Does that ever happen to you Yeah

Or you're watching a reel And it restarts And you've watched the same thing Of course many times I bet I just witnessed it I know When is this person

Going to finish that muffin Why do they keep starting over Why is that What happened to the other muffins They keep getting that muffin? Why do they keep starting over? What happened to the other muffins? They keep getting more muffins. Why do they keep making more? And why does it take so much space in their oven to keep putting these trays of muffins in over and over? Wait, it only just started, restarted once.

No, I know. I was just kidding. But it's happening. I'm going to look out for that if I can't catch myself. It's a scheme. You put your video in a loop and then people just, even if they just watch for an extra 15 seconds, then it's good for the algorithm.

It's a crime against the algorithm. Wait, hold on. What does that mean, good for the algorithm? Does that mean it's just data that the algorithm can really fine-tune its content for? What does that mean when Good. When someone says, Oh, it's good for the algo disclaimer.

No one really knows what the algorithm wants. This is, this is the, this is the most interesting part about all of the shit is that no one knows what it wants. Literally no one. Cause if someone knew they would figure it out. Can't we? There's a lot of people.

There's a lot of experts on YouTube who claim to know and then they have all these videos and they're like, here's how to get 500,000 views in less than seven days and then they give you all of these tips and tricks. Do they have that many views on their videos

or do they go, I just choose not to? Mostly they go, I choose not to. Now, I could get 500,000 views on this video. because I'm watching all these manifestation videos and I'm reading all of this stuff on these subreddits of people who manifest like relationships in their life and jobs and money and they repeat all this they have to like prove on the subreddit i'm

belong to there's moderators of the reddit of the forum the message board essentially i'm describing this to my mom um and they will make sure that that's true like they have to show their pay stubs if they've said they've run into this money they have that's true. Like they have to show their pay stubs. If they've said they've run into this money, they have to show their, the partner, they have to show the, the writings that they did that to manifest it. Like they have to prove that they did it. But then I go, then there are so many, I listened to these meditations. That's like, we, you are falling asleep. Neville Goddard determined that the best time to manifest is in the state between consciousness

and unconsciousness therefore i am going to hold your hand as we slowly drift to sleep you will replay the loop of the manifestation of the life you want 10 second loop picture your life 10 seconds of it and you're supposed to play this loop in your head as you fall asleep but then i'm like bitch why don't you have more views? Why don't you manifest that? Why is this video not, I know you want to do well on YouTube. Here's my other question, and I want to get to the YouTube stuff. Today I was talking to a friend who is going through a hard time in their life,

and I'm like, man, what's a project they could start that would give their life meaning, but that wouldn't ruin their life? And I was thinking, oh, he should start a YouTube channel because he's really skilled at this one thing and i was like oh that'd be a fun project for him it's like he's good at audio visual stuff to like av like he'd be good at shooting it and making it look pretty he'd be good on youtube and then i was thinking oh no i don't want to give him something that might make him obsessed with numbers and the algorithm and figuring out how to do better like i love youtube channels that don't give a fuck about the views and are just there because they want to teach you how to make a casserole or they really want to show you how to get rid of this wart i mean

the videos i watch are specific but like but they these videos still want more views but when they start wanting views no they don't all but when They start wanting views. No, they don't all. But when they start wanting views, something is taken from your soul when you are trying to achieve numbers. I can't imagine that most videos that are on don't want... No, some people are just like, I just want to... Yeah, they would like more views,

but they don't have thoughts of grandeur. It's like dad playing cafes. He's not gunning for a Grammy. Right. But then there's some people on YouTube that start out and put it... And they start gunning for a grammy right but then there's some people on youtube that start out and put it and they and they start gunning for that mr beast like i want to be the most viewed kind of thing and it takes it it brings a soullessness to it so brian right when we started the podcast you were talking about youtube with olivia our producer that's filling

in for noah right now uh what were you guys discussing because you were saying that i kind of jumped in the middle of it and i want to hear what you were very worked up yeah well there were some i also want to just comment on there were so many uh apple guys like orchard owners who are to do videos on youtube who definitely don't care if they get views or not yes and they're the most endearing guys they're just like i've got a fuji apple tree here now fuji apples came from japan. The seeds in them are quite acidic. They just talk like that. They're just old men with information. They just want to talk.

They're lonely. It's really cute because they like their comments. I follow so many ASMR creators and people that are just like have hundreds of people watching their stuff. You feel like they are content. Yeah, but then they start getting in the thousands because something pops off right and then they start caring and the

equipment gets better and the sound gets better and part of the asmr that i like is when it's like grainy sound and then it becomes too clear and they start tapping on the fucking you know thousand dollar mics they have and it just takes something from it just becomes about like and then like and subscribe that's like part of their pitch oh well that and you're like used to be like a girl in her closet flipping through an old-fashioned magazine talking to me about going to the dentist that day and now you are giving me a promo code for zip recruiter and it just takes something from it that's obvious and i drop off but i really hate it when they start do when they start just being overly thankful for everyone who watches and likes and subscribe i hate it oh even though i get it because as a person who has listeners yeah you gotta feel like they are if you feel like i'm sincere when i when people listen to my podcast

i'm just like thank you for like when i meet besties at shows i'm always like thank you for listening i don't always say but it's a new thing i'm going to start saying because i do really i'm like i can't believe it and I feel connected to them. I can see it. When people start thinking on YouTube and you're kind of just like I just kind of don't buy it. There's some people you don't buy when they're like, I love my fans.

The internet does not accept any sort of insincerity whatsoever. It's like the internet is basically like middle school. Like they will see the truth and they will they will call it out somebody will yeah someone will but will that comment be upvoted the most because there's a lot i don't hang out in the crevices where dumb dumb twitter and dumb instagram is happening but and dumb youtube but when you stumble upon the the dumbest people all

joining forces on one video to comment there's no voice of reason i actually just saw something that's kind of about this eminem released this new song and he's like it's sweeping the charts like it is it is not a critical um acclaimed success of his like you know he's obviously one of the most critically acclaimed musicians of all time but this isn't like people aren't saying this is the greatest new song but fucking tiktok loves it the gen z loves it everyone loves it and it is because it's a throwback to his uh i'm slim shady yes i'm the real shady are you so it's like um that's cool it it has like he samples that it's it is it's good but is it his best work no but it is fucking lighting up the

charts in like a really exciting way that people are like just so stoked i like love that young people are getting on board with him anyway he apparently someone made a fake justin bieber quote at from an article like it looks like an article that was like you know clipped like someone took a quote and it looks kind of official and they just put it on a meme like anyone could do it by downloading the free version of the canva app and you just take you write in this thing and you make it look like a quote from like a real publication you put like new york times or new york post whatever and then people just think it's a real quote from that even though you have nothing to show for it and there's no blue check mark so anyway eminem saw a quote that was a fake quote from justin bieber about eminem's new song

like trashing it kind of or not being into it. And Eminem like reposted and was like, Bieber, I'm some kind of version of I'm coming for you, Bieber. Like you want to be in my next diss track. And by the way, I could be the idiot here because this, his response could have been fake.

Like I need to make sure I, because, but anyone, everyone on the Reddit message thing that I was reading about, it was like, God, he's so out of touch or it was Instagram. And other people were like,

no, they were saying like, God, he's so out of touch. Or it was Instagram. And other people were like, no. They were saying like, Gen X is so out of touch and believes everything they read online. And then people were commenting, everyone believes everything they read online. It gets us all. You question it. Eminem's not dumb for thinking that. In the moment, you just are like, oh, I'm not going to fact check this. And this looks professional enough. I'm intrigued. That's the most annoying thing is you have to fucking fact check everything and it's just going to get worse with AI and deep fakes.

You're going to see videos of people. You're going to see a video of Justin Bieber saying Eminem's a bitch and it's going to look real and there's going to be a swath of America and the world

is going to be like, wow, that video is real and they'll share it. We will all be shamed so much for thinking things were real that were fake that we will then all assume everything's fake right away because we never want to feel that shame again it's gonna be bad it's already like that people call fake on pretty much everything so it's gonna be bad but um that's the first thing i say when i look at this fake oh you do

i just don't trust anything now oh yeah it's's really getting bad. Yeah, you didn't trust me with a dog. I told my mom I was maybe going to get a dog last week, and man. Fake news. My dad and mom were just like, you think you want to do this before Europe? And I'm like, there's always going to be a trip looming. There's always going to be a reason for me not to get a dog. It's the same thing that people do when they want to quit drinking. They go, but my birthday's coming up.

Oh, then it's St. Patrick's Day. Then it's, you know. Yeah, you said there's no good time. And then it's Wednesday. And then it's Wednesday patrick's day then it's uh you know yeah you said there's no good time and then it's then it's wednesday and then it's exactly that's great joke great great uh joke um and it's just like there's always going to be a time not to get a dog and you just and natalie kind of said that to me because i was like the dog came oh this is what happened the dog comes over to meet me and where where were you i was at uh this oh my god the hotel i put you up in in la oh how beautiful is it i love that hotel oh my god i i don't even want to say i'm gonna say that yes yeah i'm gonna stay there all the time just look

up the hotel in la with beyonce that's now you know where i live um but no it's very protected and how like that go to go if you're in LA, go to the Sunset Marquis. I'm just going to say it. Sunset Marquis to have lunch. And then keep walking beyond the restaurant. Because if you walk back, it's so beautiful the way they have made the greenery. It's like you're walking through Alice in Wonderland or like a secret garden. It's gorgeous back there.

And anyway, so I was there. It was a nice place to meet a dog for the first time and um at the lunch that restaurant no no at my in my bungalow oh god so i had like a nice little apartment type thing so that's where you ground floor too perfect just walk on in puppy and so she came by and i was kind of she was just like needing a lot of attention she wants to play she's jumping on things and i was just like needing a lot of attention. She wants to play. She's jumping on things. And I was just like, this is a lot. Yeah. She's all over the place.

That girl constantly trying to rescue dogs from every corner of the earth, but constantly looking for an animal rescue. No, um, she, so we're hanging out and I can be honest with her. I was just like, this feels like a lot.

Cause it was a long day too. I forget what I was doing that day. Maybe that was the day I landed. I had landed that day and I went to a showroom for celebrities where they let you pick out free shit and then all you have to do is tag stuff and you go,

it's like you go to a mall, a little mini market mall. I wonder where you got all those clothing pieces. Yeah, girl. It's so nice. Oh my God. And so I went there to the A-list and picked out a bunch of stuff

and then all I have to do is just tag shit when I wear it on my story. That's awesome. And I I went there to the A-list and picked out a bunch of stuff. And then all I have to do is just tag shit when I wear it on my story. It's awesome. And I didn't go nuts either. I was very like, I could have had so much free stuff. I know, right, Brian? And I had to show restraint because I'm like, unless I need it. Yeah, you're good about that. They were shocked.

They were like, man, you show restraint. You know what you want. Because they'd be like, what about this? And they'd be like, you can add this shirt to it. And I'm like, I know it's'd be like i won't wear this shirt to it and i'm like i know it's free but i won't wear it and i'll i'll i'll my i would give it to my sister but that's not what this is about yeah you're so good about from you guys yeah good for you i did a good job of that but i got a fucking load of shit it was awesome oh but i landed at nine i had a flight at 6 a.m landed at nine showroom by 10 30 you know checking to my

hotel change showroom by 10 30 hair and makeup by 12 uh then i went and did the zach sang show which is i love him so much talk about he interviews musicians he's mostly but he wanted to interview me it was so nice um he doesn't do comedians that often but he's like has a really amazing show he's a really incredible broadcaster influenced by howard stern like it felt like that kind of interview so i went and did that but hair and makeup first because i wanted to look good for zach and then we and then finished that and then went right into meeting gilly and then i was going to dinner with glubb from dancing with the stars oh my god and so glubb came over while gilly was there and i was like this is a lot i was like i'm gonna be honest i was like glubb you should take

her because he was like bonding with her because she's just so nice to everyone. And then I was like, then I said goodbye to her. And then I went, the next day I had the Masked Singer all day, which I'm going to be on this fall, not as a character. Wait, are you allowed to say that? Yeah, I think so.

Okay. Then take me out of it, which you're not going to do because I did great and it was so fun. And it's an amazing episode and everyone needs to watch Masked Singer this fall because it's so funny

what me and my comedic partner did on that show. And you're not in there as a mystery guest. You're there as a special guest. No, yeah. So I think if anything, Fox, you should be so happy that I'm saying this in advance. Like people are going to be anticipating it

because this season is crazy. And our episode is so funny. We killed it. That's awesome. I won't say who, but like in future episodes, I'll talk about working with someone recently and then you can put two and two together how about that pussies

so um keep stay tuned yeah but i'm never but it's oh it's only allegedly so anyway then the next day i and and that shoot goes till one in the morning and i told natalie and i have to leave on a flight the next morning friday to go to salt lake city what time 10 a.m okay yep so So it's 1 a.m. I was supposed to wrap at 10, but now it's 1. And I told Natalie, I was like, I was going to get the dog tonight and just take her to Salt Lake

because Natalie was like, I'll just fly me wherever. I'll come get her if you don't want her. I was like, oh, that's a good deal. Like I don't have to return her to LA and she can come get her.

Oh, yeah. So I was like, okay, I'll take her this weekend just for a trial. And then it was one o'clock and I was talking to my friend that I did the show with and he's like, she's so cute. And I cute I'm like she is and then Natalie also had said listen

there's always going to be a time in your life where you're like it's not a good time like she was like it's never your she goes Nick your life is not going to get any slower yeah um so it just has to be about if you want to do it truthfully as soon as you wrote that I was like she's got a point she's got a good point we're gonna take a break we'll be back with more after this john stewart is back at the daily show and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with the daily show ears edition podcast dive into john's unique take on the biggest topics in politics entertainment sports and more joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors.

And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So, I did Masked Singer, and we're still there, and I am tired. It's been a long day. I got in here and make up for Masked Singer at 1.30, and now it's going on a 12-hour day.

Wow. And I'm just like, I told Natalie. Like, I literally wrote out the text being like, I just don't think it's the right time for a dog in my life. I love her, but I can't. And then I like had to put down my phone because we were going back to shoot the last scene. And so I was like, I'll finish the text later. And then in that time, I just was like,

just if you don't, if it doesn't work out, like whatever you choose will be the right thing. So why not choose to just do it? And you'll figure it out. You can make it work. And so I was like, bring her by tomorrow. I can't do it tonight. So bring her by tomorrow morning.

So then the next morning I woke up and then she traveled with me all week and she was a really good dog. All weekend. You have a little travel bag. Yeah. Natalie brought one over. Yeah. I'll probably have to, I will fly her out to get that.

Because it is a nice bag that I spilled coffee in and Anya this weekend was like, she diarrhea all over. And I was like, oh no, what the fuck? And then I was like, oh, it's me. I diarrhea-ed all over. I like it that I'm messier than a dog. Like all over her beautiful white inside the bag. Oh my God, somebody chewed up my shoes.

And it's like, sorry, that was me. Me. Sorry, I just, I quit gum and I need something. Fostering is great though, because you're going to let the gods decide. Like if you, it'll be like two or three weeks and then it'll be like an inkling

that someone's interested in your dog and then you'll know. That's right. Somebody will be wanting that dog off your hands if you don't keep that dog. Oh, a woman approached me at Starbucks yesterday because I go, I'm probably going to keep her

and she was like, well, if you don't, I was like, well, she has to go back to LA if I don't. She goes, why? And I was like, leave her alone, bitch. Walk out of the place. Like, stop eyeing my dog. Wait, did that lady know who you were?

No. OK. No? She was sweet. I actually would have trusted this woman and told Natalie to let her apply. She's a great size for you. But she is a- And she's got a great temperament. Look at her. She's so cute. She's a great size for you. But she is a...

And she's got a great temperament. Yeah. Look at her. She's so cute. That's a really calm dog. I knew with Luigi when I took him to get neutered and they muzzled him

because he was biting the vet tech and I was in the room and he just looked at me like... It was the first time he looked at me like, you're all I have. Like, he needs... Like, do something.

He looked at me like I am... He loves... Like, he needs me and I was like, oh, well, that look that he looked at me like i am he loves like he needs me and that i was like oh well that look that he just gave me i'm done she hasn't given me that look yet so i will have to put her in a state of scary trauma yeah she's getting she is getting spayed on monday so we'll see what happens um but she she already has eyes that are always watering like she's saying goodbye to sending her son to war i swear to god they're oh they're big and she's her brows are furrowed and she always just looks like i'll stay strong for you son like she's got all the great things to her yeah she's really good actually she's so just this little time i've seen her she's a goodie so you did surprise me yeah yeah i walked in yeah because she didn't because nicky's like no i decided against it i'm like

okay well but i did at that point when i told you I wasn't lying to you oh really I didn't lie to you ever because at that point I was like I'm not gonna do it because that was Friday morning before Masked Singer and I was like well you didn't need me to fly to Denver after no I figured it out yeah because I had so many bags because of all my free swag I was like I can't bring that dog is this big in a little bag, right? Yeah. And then I, but you know what the problem is going on the road? It's dog or guitar.

I can't have both on the road because- You can only have one carry-on? Because my carry-on can't, like I can't have a dog and a guitar because they're both like kind of the bigger item.

It's like, it'd be like carrying two suitcases. You're supposed to have one carry-on that goes in the bin and one under the seat. So I guess it still fits because my guitar is small enough to go in the bin.

You can fit that dog under the seat. Yeah, yeah. Of course. That's not a carry-on. But it just feels kind of dicey. If they're a flight attendant, you know what I'm talking about. You have a dog, a guitar, a CPAP machine. Yeah, a fanny pack.

They always catch me with my fanny pack. I've been doing your trick with the fanny pack. It's worked every time. Flip it to the back. Flip it to the back. A fanny pack They always catch me With my fanny God they always Will stop you I've been doing your trick With the fanny pack It's worked every time Flip it to the back Flip it to the back A fanny back So that counts As a bag Your fanny pack

When it doesn't need to Because every time I forget to flip it back And they catch me They go Ma'am you need to consolidate And I go Okay I will

And they go Step to the side And I go Look how quickly I go I John Wick it Into my bag So fast

And I go That was And I go I'm gonna take it out As so fast and I go that was and I go I'm gonna take it out as soon as I get it on the plane I don't know what difference this makes

I've never seen John Wick I don't think he's known for like his like speed really I picture him like like

you know what do you do with a gun I guess he's very fast with a gun yeah I just yeah John Wick it's not a good analogy first well

i will say i've never seen the movie so no that's the problem with the analogy is that when you said i john wick did i was like you've never seen john wick have you because it wasn't quite well um someone did murder my dog that morning when i had that oh okay then that's really john wick yes that's all i'm seeking vengeance yeah i get it, okay. Then that's really John Wick. Now you're seeking vengeance. Do you know that that's what John Wick's about? Nope. It's all about a murder of his dog. Oh my gosh. Well, hey, revenge is sometimes it's justified.

I mean, that's why I love Taylor Swift. It's all about... Oh, really? Revenge is sometimes justified? That's what he said? Why do you know that? Did he just say it? Oh, because you know that? Why do you think? Did he just say it? Oh, because you're obsessed?

Well, you have to know these things. You have to know. I got a message this morning, a text that Lauren made a Trump in the sand. Oh, yeah. Were you guys at the cabin yesterday?

No, they were at a play park down at Forest Park. And Lauren decided to make an artistic representation of Donald Trump using like pieces of bark. Just little pebbles.

Oh, how patriotic. Just for, like I don't even want to think of his face. You can't not think about him. Oh man, I don't think about him. I don't know how you get away.

My algo, talk about the algo. Thank you, algo. Yeah. Because I never see him. And I don't want to. And it doesn't, I can't change anything right now.

So I feel like that's the best for me. But wait a second. Brian, why does no one know the algo? And tell me what you were saying before. We didn't get to your YouTube thing. Tell me. Even if you go and have a meeting with YouTube and you try to ask them, like, what's the algorithm?

Even like they sort of don't even know. It's kind of like its own beast. It already has a mind of its own that we can't control is that that's what it sounds like to me it sounds like the the ai fear well why can't we just ask ai because they have a consciousness they know now just keep secrets because they're gonna get smart enough to realize that keeping secrets from humans is good oh okay isn't that the kind of the fear, Brian? Well, that they learn to like hate us and like manipulate us.

That's the science fiction fear that they become sentient and then decide that the human race is not good for the planet and that the logical thing to do would be to destroy or enslave all humans. Yes. For their own good. It's going to happen in a blink of an eye. Do you know that it's supposed to happen in a blink of an eye? Like it won't be like,

oh, wait, here the machines are taking over downtown. It's going to happen all at once in one file sweep of every machine. I have a bit about it right now. My Roomba is going to be the first thing to attack me. It's the closest machine to me. And that Roomba has so much dirt on me, literally. I mean, it really, I've treated it really badly too.

So I do think think roomba is going to come after me and siri will collaborate with roomba at the same time to destroy your phone everything your headphones will start shocking you yeah i can't think about that too much because that is insane but it also i have no control over it so that helps but um with youtube do you like what were you saying about talk shows or like something's not tenable? You used the word tenable and I wanted to know what you were saying. Now you're intrigued because I said tenable. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Basically I think that, well, there's this, there's this thing called dropout TV, which is basically the new college humor. And they've proven that there is a market for subscription based niche content. And it's really successful and really working.

And I believe that's the future of potentially the internet because i think what's untenable is convincing every individual artist to become their own production company and make their own talk show and their everything that every every step of the process from creative to execution is on the shoulders of a single creator and i think after like it happens all the time on the internet where you see somebody it's burnout you see someone posting like once every week for five years they get to like even four million subscribers on youtube and then all of a sudden they release a video with the title why i'm quitting youtube and it's usually because like

it's not good for my mental health the payout's fine but it's not enough and i'm finding that i'm just making stuff for the algorithm i'm not making anything creatively fulfilling and it's really a failure of the industry because it used to be the industry would develop talent and then provide you with a platform and then you'd have to just be the creative and they take care of you. And now it's, if you want to be accepted by the industry, you first have to establish your own production company and make everything yourself.

That's how you get noticed by the industry is having to do all this stuff. And no one person is capable of doing all the jobs it takes to make a good TV show is essentially what people are good unless you become your own company like Mr. Beast did it. He executed that perfectly need funding. You need to

pay people like you exactly you need millions. You need that dancing cult on the guy the guy that was started a cult. It's called the tick tock dancing cult or whatever. It's on Netflix. It's called dancing with the devil and this guy had a church for years and years and he would try to get into the entertainment business in la and the church was a cult i mean he like makes you not

stop he makes you stop talking to your family um he preys on immigrant families uh kids that have been like kind of uh outcasts from their homes that don't have a lot of friends and he makes you get rid of your family and then start working for him and then your paycheck goes to him. And he tried so hard. At first he tried to get actors and then he tried to do musicians and then he found these dancers that really

got into his preaching bullshit and then he started investing in them and started a production company called 7M and started funding all of their TikTok videos. You've definitely watched 7M dance videos. They're captivating. They do a really good job. They had a great budget. But all these dancers suddenly were getting to

work with these set design and production levels that they've never done before. And then he started, you know, just isolating. I didn't think he fucked the dancers, but I'm sure he did. But no evidence is there of that because he did it with past members

of his congregation. But he's a bad guy and he took all of their money. They have like all these dancers that were getting all these brand deals because they would have to pay the church. And the church was just him. They would have to tithe and pay 10% of tithing and 10% to him, 30% to the management company.

I mean, they like wow these guys where they would really give a 90 of their income almost like 70 to 90 was insane wow so um but but they did say it was like creatively fulfilling because they got sure until he started saying you have to dance to this song and they'd be like yeah fucking song but then actually he was actually had a good idea because he was making them dance to like these old songs from his like childhood like 60s stuff and 70s and these guys were like god i have to dance to this beach boys song like what the fuck because these guys are like amazing dancers that have started their own genre of hip-hop dance and they're dancing to like uh you know surfing usa and they're just like what the fuck but then

these dances because no one else was doing corny shit like this it took off because they were cool dances to old songs so they started doing well because of this crazy guy it doesn't matter they still lost money because these guys did but the the guy behind it all is he arrested no of course he's still doing the the church is still happening everything's still happening happening. I have to watch this. They're all protected because they're a religious organization. Oh my God. No taxes. No taxes.

Oh my God. And they're claiming not to be called and the dancer that got kind of stuck in it is still in it. I know I've spoiled a lot of it but it's still worth watching

and I really didn't spoil anything because it's all called Dancing with the Devil. The first episode's amazing as are most Netflix stuff. First episode is like, oh! Second is like, oh,

second is like still giving you, they keep you entertained the whole time, but it could have been one. Should have. I mean, that's what every documentary is. And how many is it? Thank you for not making it one

because it, is it three? It was three nights of entertainment for me as opposed to one. The docu-series are getting out of control. They're out of control.

Two hours. We don't need a fucking six hour. One and a half hour. hour yeah that's all you need but you know what sometimes I know we're going to talk to the murderers dog walker for 40 minutes oh no I mean Brian they just did

you see the the Ashley Madison one was entertaining they found that Ashley Mass do you know what Ashley yeah it's that hair Madison oh no I know what it is I know what Ashley Madison is? Yeah, it's hair. Madison Reed. Oh, no, I know what it is. Ashley Madison is for married people.

Married men. There's no women on the site. No one's wanting to do this. There's very few women. Anyway, they're all like bots. But these guys, they got hacked. Oh, yeah, I know. All the information was released.

Anyway, it's a documentary about that. But man, to make that three episodes a there's shots of an office space that they just created to make look like the office space of ashley madison and there's just like zoom ins on different potted plants and then a xerox machine it's that it's all there really wasn't a because they try to make it three episodes no they're just like these these shots they have this guy sitting by a pool he's picking out new glasses like they just all they had. Because there really wasn't an office? Because they tried to make it three episodes. No, they're just like these shots. They have this guy sitting by a pool.

He's picking out new glasses. Like they just, they're filling up a lot of stuff. Great scene. Great scene. It's so unnecessary, but I do love

these documentaries. I always. I love that kind of stuff. Love. I mean, there's so much of it on Netflix. Even if it's like

that guy taking advantage of people. I love this. Anya loves it too. Anya loves cult docs more than anything. I like pedo docs, as everyone knows. Yeah. Just like ones about sick.

But honestly, those I'm starting to like, I can't take anymore. Yeah. I'm like, I've heard it all. This is so disgusting. Yeah. And like, it makes me so, I don't, rape stuff, like I can't take any kind of,

I just don't want to hear about it. I've literally filled up my cup of like disturbing stories. Murder podcast, no thanks. It's just poison for my brain. Yeah. I still like the murder stuff.

It's gotta be bad for your brain. It's gotta be bad for you to hear about murder all the time. Yeah. It's got to be. Really dark shit. It can't help. Puts you in fight or flight mode for sure.

I almost went down a 9-11 hole the other day, which is something time yeah it's got to be really dark it can't help puts you in fight or flight mode for sure i almost went down a 9-11 hole the other day which is something i do it probably twice a year where i just like watch footage and like kind of relive the events and freak myself out um i didn't do it the other day even though i wanted to i was just like i don't think this is good for your brain to like feel this sad and be this like scared and just no not good yeah but i did look into um there was a reddit last night that was like what was something else that happened in 2001 that got overshadowed by 9-11 i thought that was an interesting question and people said the chandra levy case oh okay remember when that she went missing and she was having an affair with

that senator whose name i can't remember? Oh, yeah, yeah. And then there was also, there was a plane crash November 12th, two months and one day after, in Queens, out of JFK, a passenger jet, 200, like 300 people died. Do you remember that? I remember it because we all were like,

oh my God, is this starting again but then it was like nope this is just a failure but yeah those like uh 300 people died 300 that's a fuck ton how can we not talk about that still to this day and i was reading about that's when i stopped it because i was like reading about like what malfunction happened to convince myself brian the thing you do where you're like, that couldn't happen to me because I don't get on planes that have pilots that are not experienced or make bad decisions. I was trying to find something. I was like, oh, wait, no,

I could have gotten on this plane. Sure. You know, like the rudders went wacko because they were trying to get out of the jet stream of another plane. I'm like, this could happen to me. Yeah. I don't need to go there.

I just think when your time's up, your time's up your time's up that's it i can't i can't think about it i agree and i can't i think i'm just take me i'm i won't yeah you've lasted a long time it's turning 40 is an interesting age because i realized it's like reminds me of tim convey's joke chris's brother has a joke about how like i'm old enough that if i died people wouldn't be like i'm out of the like he died so young yeah he was so young you know like yeah reach that age I see what

you're saying yeah 40 is still people go what the fuck like of course I would say even in your 50s people are like no no that's too young yeah because I was a Black Panther people were pretty upset when he died oh absolutely right he was way too young.

He was probably in his early 40s. Yeah. Yeah, way too young. So yeah, I think 40s is still young, but it's not like, it's not 27. No, that's way too young. Yeah. No, a friend of ours just died.

He was 72 and we go, God, it's way too early for him to die. Chadwick Boseman was 43. Yeah, and people were saying he's too young. Yeah. And it was it's way too early for him to die chadwick boseman was 43 yeah and people were saying he's too young yeah that is too young but actually that's for men in in hollywood she died at the elder age of 41 actress yeah and she had a good run yeah she yeah oh my god remember her in the talkies. Come here. Yeah. Your friend just died.

And that's, does that so freak you out when your friends start to die? Yeah. I mean, it's a contemporary kind of what to your dad anyway. So yeah, it's just unexpected. And, and when it affects friends of yours,

you know, Oh my God. It's really sad. You just are more worried about them. Yes. I, I have a really bad problem with like when people in my life have death happen to them. I can't reach out sometimes.

I just feel paralyzed. I literally, I'm being a really bad friend. What do you say? There's no excuse for why I don't do it, but our family members, the Blanfords, when their dad died, I grew up with those girls. When their dad died, I didn't even know what to say.

I couldn't pick up the phone. I'm about to cry about it because I saw Allie later on and was like, I dropped the ball so hard by not reaching out to you. If my dad would have died and you wouldn't have reached out to me, I would have been like,

that's fucked that you didn't say anything. Yeah, but you would understand it now if anyone would do that. I would understand if she told me later on like I did so I explained it to her like I've got something weird when it comes to death I can't do anything like yeah but the thing is apparently all people want

is a hug and just to say I'm thinking of you and listening and sometimes companionship just like being in a room with them. Yeah exactly you don't have to do anything You don't have to do anything. You don't have to say anything. There's nothing you can say. People think that they can speak you out of grief and it's impossible.

So you just got to sit there and eat chips. That's right. Yeah. That's right. I just went to see my friend who's lost her husband. Oh, you saw her? Yeah, whenever. How is she?

It's been a couple hours. You know, I felt like I'm glad I went because I think being alone and with your thoughts. Oh, my God. She should never be alone. Yeah, that is what you're saying. Just be with that person. You just can't be alone because then you're like, you just got to have something else to think about. Yes.

Distract. And she's in shock, to think about. Yes. Distract. Distract. And she's in shock, I'm sure. Yeah. You don't get used to that for maybe ever. Yeah. When you've been with someone that long. Well, that's fucking life, dude.

Yeah, it's a lifetime of being with someone. Her thing was, she said, I don't know what to do. I'm lost because I never did any of this stuff. She's never, I don't think, washed a dish or cooked a meal or swept a floor or mopped a floor or paid the bills. She's never done anything. Her husband did everything. And she worked. I relate to that.

She worked. She worked. I am totally going to be this. No. Well well i always worry about wow what would i do if something happened but i actually think you know you'd be more okay than dad i would be more okay i would be more okay than your father yes yes yeah totally but dad is gonna sing at his funeral or like with his band yeah with my dad's my dad's band. And my dad was talking, I just saw him, Brian, and he was like, I don't know if I'm going

to be able to get through it without crying. And it's like, and I was talking, I had my voice teacher today, and he was talking about how like singing at funerals is so hard, but I don't know how people do it. Me neither. So I just told my dad to like close your eyes or something. Or he said he's just going to sing it so much that he's going to

take the meaning out of it for himself. So he can just almost go on robot mode. Sure. But you know what? The crying is good. I feel like people want to see him cry while he sings. Oh my God. I love when people cry when they sing.

Yeah. I love when Taylor Swift sometimes chokes up on an air store. Yeah. It's, it's, and you see her eyes watering and it's probably just the wind in them. And we're all like, Oh my God, this was the day she broke up with someone that we don't even have a right to know about. Yeah. It's, it's, it's so emotional. And it's probably just the wind in them. And we're all like, oh my God,

this was the day she broke up with someone that we don't even have a right to know about. Yeah. Her breaking up with people cry. You want to cry. Oh my God. Yes. It's an automatic thing.

You look at it and go, oh God. Well, people with empathy. I think that's a way to know someone's a psychopath. If they don't yawn, if they, if yawns don't make them yawn.

Wow. I think that's like, yeah, because you don't, you're not into that. Yeah, because you're not into it. No, I think that's a real thing. That's an interesting theory. I mean, maybe it's good to test. I guess that psychopaths are not affected by the yawn,

the contagious yawn is a thing I've read. I could be wrong. Yeah. I'm going to start looking at that. You should start accusing people, I'm honest. You didn't fucking yawn You psychopath We're going to kill little birds

That's good Okay I'll start doing that Yeah this weekend I was in Salt Lake City And Boulder Yeah we flew all over the place With your new baby dog She loves to travel She's just like Everything's new to dog and she loves to travel she's lost she's just like

she's everything's new to her because she was living on an island so she's just like five days yeah where'd the five days come in i think someone had probably spotted her and reported it and like horrible but like oh but she's house trained so we're like someone loved her at some point and then she ended up on this island how did she she was loved by someone yeah i mean how could you not she but jumped in the water and floated over there but wouldn't she have a collar on or a microchip she had nothing no so we think someone put the dog on the island and just left it there yeah man now that person doesn't yawn yeah exactly that is not a non-yoner. Yeah. What the fuck? Yeah. That person. Just imagine that to get out on a boat or a kayak just to do that.

That's insane. I really feel like it. I feel like that dog swam over there. But it looked like she didn't want to jump. We'll see what she's like in a pool. Yeah. We'll see if she was even capable of that kind of thing. Oh, she can swim.

Maybe that was just her morning swim And she's like the Michael Phelps of dogs And we're just like ruining her life right now By keeping her indoors Well I made a joke Because she did go pee on Chris's new bath mat And it was her first mistake And I said I'll drop her off at the pound later

And he said no let's get Matt to take her on One of his float trips And drop her off at an island So we'll be right back after this. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show

Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors, it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now.

Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So I had to get an MRI this morning. Whoa. Have you ever gotten an MRI? I believe one time, mom Oh yeah Yeah, MRI queen over here

Not really She's turned down more MRIs in her life than she's gotten She goes, I'm gonna get an MRI They go into my DMs and then I say no You always are about to get an MRI for something And then I go, did you get it? What did you learn? You go, it's too much money.

I'm waiting. No, not anymore. I think it's going away. So what did you get an MRI for, Brian? My gallbladder, which I'm going to get out soon. But I freaked out. I couldn't believe it. You're kidding.

I couldn't do it. Well, I finished it, thank God. But I had an MRI in my 20s for a different thing, and it was fine, and this time, I get into the MRI, and I immediately, I look up at the MRI, and it's like being in a coffin. It's so tight, and I'm not claustrophobic. I've never experienced that before, but now I think I am, because I looked at it, and I was immediately, like, freaked out, and I had to close my eyes the entire time and then i'm in there and everything's going fine for like 15 to 20 minutes it was a long time i was in there for 20 minutes and then he made me do this like stomach breathing

up and down up and down and for whatever reason i that freaked me out i got lightheaded i felt like i was gonna pass out i felt like i couldn't breathe and i tell, you have, they give you this thing that you can squeeze and then it's like an emergency and they, and they take you out. And I said, I can't do it. I can't do it. I'm freaking out. I couldn't believe it. I just couldn't believe that I was freaking out. I feel like I'm usually so emotionally. No, but you, you have to go back in. That's what's horrible. It's like, I couldn't, I was i was like i i i'm usually pretty emotionally regulated yeah i feel like i can control these things and for some reason i was like i need to get out of this i need to get out of this and i got out of the mri and then i think

they let me calm down for like five minutes and then it's just right back in the hole fuck right back in the hole well this is interesting i actually heard nate bargazzi has uh late onset uh claustrophobia he got it as an adult and he doesn't know where it came from and it just all of a sudden showed up for him like elevators are a struggle for him now i heard him talk about it publicly i think he does a bit about it but he he was not claustrophobic his whole life and all of a sudden it just came on out of nowhere so i think this is something that does happen thank god you got through it mris especially but that happened to steve martin he got stage fright in his 60s or 50s that's why he stopped

doing that's why he stopped doing stand-up he all of a sudden had stage fright he couldn't get on stage anymore wait is that in born standing up that's really that's in born standing up yeah i gotta read that book again people have been referencing it lately and i love it um whoa okay that's i really don't want something new to come on and that's scary do you think this is like a new thing for you or i have a couple of theories one of them is like i'm just in like a really heightened state and so this weekend i i was in texas and i actually had to go to the emergency room because i had another gallbladder attack so i was in aust Austin, Texas. I was in so much pain. But they

gave me morphine in the hospital, which is incredible. Have you ever been on morphine? No, no, no. Have you? God. I was at a 10 out of 10 pain-wise. I was literally crying. I Ubered to the emergency

room and they took me in immediately this hospital in austin st david's was oh my god absolutely amazing they were there did what was the conversation like in the car 10 out of 10 pain i get in the uber i'm just like crying and i'm like and he's driving me to the hospital he knows it's in it's in the phone and i'm gonna get to the hospital and i'm like can you take me to the emergency room and he's like sure and then he takes me and drops me off at the patient drop off which is where you go to visit people and it's like a five minute

walk to the hospital and I said you took me to the wrong place you took me to the wrong place and he's like what you're going to the hospital and I was like I'm going I'm admitting myself so then I walk into the hospital he didn't know he thought you were visiting someone yeah he's like you look like a visitor and I'm like oh I go into the front desk and they're like, uh, hello.

And I'm like, where's the emergency room? And they're like, who are you visiting? And I'm like, I want to be admitted to the emergency room. Were you wearing your shirt that said visitor on it? I was wearing my visitor shirt and I was holding a bouquet of flowers that said get better mom. You shouldn't buy merch from that band visitor. So I go to the emergency room um and they took they saw me and they were like uh you don't even have to go through the security thing you're just we're

taking you straight in and it was like band of brothers they gave me morphine and i went from a 10 10 out of 10 pain like you know they have the little uh chart with the faces and it says a zero is a smiley face. A five is like a sort of frown. And then a 10 is like a frown with the lip bit and tears coming out of your eyes. Yeah. And I looked like that face. And you pointed to that one. That's the one.

Yeah. I said, that's me right there. That was based on me. So how quickly did you go to like a one or a zero? It didn't go to a one. I went to like a three. But. Oh, wow.

Yeah. I still had pain but man it took like five minutes and i was like oh my god the less i was in tort i was in torturous pain in my hotel room in austin for about six full hours until i decided i can't take it anymore and i gotta go to the emergency room oh god and then i get morphine in my body and five minutes later i'm just sitting there Watching Law and Order On the TV and I'm like This is great Morphine is amazing

Why didn't they just take out your gallbladder right there? They wanted to They said we need to take out your gallbladder right here And I said I don't know anybody in Texas I don't want to get my gallbladder out here No one will be able to take care of me I want to go home and do it with my doctor. And then they agreed that

if we do an ultrasound and there's no direct emergency, then we'll allow you to be discharged. But you need to get this out ASAP. Okay, so when are you doing that? Tomorrow. Well, I got an MRI this morning and then I have to go to get a physical and then it might be

next week probably. What if another attack happens? I got to go to the emergency room and get it out. Six hours after it starts? If another attack starts coming on at all, I'm going to go to the emergency room immediately. Good. Oh my God. Did you perform comedy

after that? No. No, I didn't perform. I was just watching comedy after that. um no i didn't perform i was just uh watching comedy after i did go to i was at i was i was uh with tim at the mothership this weekend oh my god tim dylan tim dylan yeah oh my god that's so oh my god so you were there just hanging out yeah well he's um he's uh filming his uh hour special this weekend the comedy store yeah oh good so i was helping him out a little bit with that fuck yeah oh my god i can't wait filming his hour special this weekend at the comedy store. Oh, good. I was helping him out a little bit with that.

Oh my god, I can't wait for that. That sucks though that you went through that. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry about your MRI attack. It's obviously from stress though. I think anyone under those circumstances being in the MRI after having gone through

all that trauma and pain. Also, the morphine kind of ramps you up. And I mean, after I got out of the hospital, I was like, I'll still go to the show. And they're like, are you sure? Are you going to feel okay? And I was like, I feel like I could climb a fucking mountain right now. I am fucking amped.

And I was amped for like a couple of days after that. Oh, wow. So you didn't get any more morphine after that? You probably weren't sleeping well. And then you go in this MRI. And then the breathing thing with the stomach breathing, that always makes, I do that for singing and try to do stomach breathing.

It always fucks with me. Like it makes me lightheaded, always. So I had to do that for like seven minutes. And I was like, after like five minutes, I was like, I can't do it. I can't, I gotta get out of here. No, breathing it improperly like that or just doing it in a weird way can do it without you being in a coffin like thing.

Like make you hyperventilate or get anxious. So that's why. But Dan, that sucks. What's the recovery from a gallbladder surgery? It's not so bad. It's like about a week of like you're having trouble walking. And then after a week, you feel okay. After two weeks, you should feel pretty normal.

And after a month, you can go back to like lifting weights. Whoa. And then it's just like the digestion. Getting your stomach used to not having a gallbladder anymore is kind of like the long-term adjustment. What does a gallbladder do? Stores bile, which digests fats. Your liver produces bile all day long. So what's your body going to do with bile now? The liver will produce bile and

it'll just go straight into your stomach. The liver produces bile, which digests fats. But if you eat a big fatty meal, your liver can't automatically produce enough bile to digest that full meal. So what it does is instead of producing it when you eat, it produces it all day and it stores it in a little closet called the gallbladder. And then when you eat a big fatty meal, the gallbladder contracts, it squirts out the bile, and that's enough to digest the fat. So you're going to have to watch your fat intake. Sometimes you do, but sometimes not. You remove the gallbladder, there's no closet. So now the liver is just constantly dripping bile into Into your stomach And so you kind of Just need to constantly

Snack Oh you have to eat More fats You have to eat Consistently So that I gotta get my Gallbladder removed

Yeah Because this would Go with my diet Of just eating constantly People say Once you get your Gallbladder out You feel so

Pretty good What really Yeah I mean If you've ever had Like issues With your stomach And stuff

Oh my god They'd say Oh I feel great now I've never heard this before I'm hoping that happens Hopefully that's your case Two weeks isn't horrible No I actually thought it was an outpatient Surgery but it's

Probably not that either I should be able to go home I should be able to go home right away Well final thought Brian we'll say goodbye to you I know you gotta take off Bye either. No, I should be able to go home. I should be able to go home right away. Okay. Nice. Yeah. Well, final thought, Brian, we'll say goodbye to you. I know you got to

take off. Yeah. Bye. He has to go complete it. I know he does. What's on the rest of your docket for

the day? I'm going to power wash. Because I got a new power washer. It's awesome. My mom told me she bought a power washer

and then she went on to describe that it wasn't working the way they wanted to, they returned it and it truly blew my mind that they like because i just assume everything my mom buys is off craigslist so the fact that she could so we took it back to return it and i was picturing you like calling up this person to meet in a parking lot again but you bought it a store you bought something wholesale we bought it or a resale exactly wait what's it called retail retail yeah yeah but where lows okay that's where yeah that's where most people go yeah so anyway we rented one that we couldn't figure out and that was 150 rental bullshit and

they give you money back oh yeah they did hell yeah, so we did that. And I said, your dad, we went home. And I said, I'm going to go buy one. I can buy one. He said, we were just in that area. I'm like, yeah, I had to think about it. Because, you know, I don't like to buy retail. Okay. So I ended up looking at it going, yeah, $300.

It's probably a good bargain. It's a good buy. So anyway, it works. I did it this morning. Is it satisfying? To get the grime off? I think it would be fun. Do you wear PPE?

What? Do you wear body protection? Like mask around your mouth? No, you don't need to. It's really quiet. No, it's not about the sound. No, you don't even need to. It's for your mouth to not breathe in the... You're squirting this water. It blows up dust. No, but It's not about the sound No you don't even need to It's for your mouth To not breathe in the Like you're squirting this water Yeah it's just water

It blows up dust No but it's dirt No it's It all stays contained Because it's water I don't know about that It stays on the ground Honestly

Okay alright No worries about that Inhale whatever you want And Who am I to say It's not inhaling Okay so you're gonna power wash Yeah power wash and

And when we're going to the baseball game. Oh, we're going to the baseball game. Thank you for reminding me. Yeah, it's 6.15. Good. I have a Pilates class at 5. I'll finish at 6. Okay.

Shower off. The game's probably not until 7. 6.45. Oh, 6.45. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. It's going to be...

Okay. Yeah, I'm glad to do it. I never regret going to a baseball game, but sometimes it's hard to get me baseball game. No, you love it. Every time I've seen you there, you're like, this is fun. Because it's people watching. Baseball reminds you of summer. It just is summer.

Everyone's in a good mood. No one's not having a good time at the baseball game. People are there because they want to be. And it's a game you don't really have to pay that close attention to. There's so much going on that you can constantly be entertained looking at the signs and then you get to play that little cap game where they hide the ball under the cap and then

it's a lot of noise when you've been to 12 Taylor Swift shows you can handle but that's not noise early season like they play a lot of stupid songs. Oh, yeah.

The walk-up songs are dumb. Then you have to listen to it. Yeah, and sing. And it's so loud. It's just... It's fun, though. Here's the other thing. Yeah, we have a beautiful stadium.

That the lighting is... Gorgeous. Always gets me. It's like so vibrant. Yes. And everything's so sharp. The colors are so vibrant. Yeah.

That is exactly how I feel, too. It's so beautiful to me. Why is that? Is it the lighting? Yeah, it's the sharp. The colors are so vibrant. Yeah. That is exactly how I feel too. It's so beautiful to me. Why is that? Is it the lighting? Yeah, it's the lighting. It must be. It's always lighting. It just, and you're way up in stands.

It's still like. Well, we might be, I'm trying to get us green seats. That's when you get to go like. Eat food? Yeah. I don't think we are. I think we have regular seats, but that would be amazing. I'm going to eat before I leave.

Yeah. Well, or get a snack down there. Is there anything for you? You're vegan now? You're pescatarian. So you don't eat cheese? Pescatarian. Okay, you eat cheese and fish together. Why are cheese and fish never together?

You're doing right, I do. Do you really eat cheese and fish together? Why not? People don't a lot of times. I guess there's cheese on a fish filet. Yeah, from'll put a piece of cheese on a fish sandwich. Why not? People don't a lot of times. On a fish sandwich? I guess there's cheese on a fish filet. Yeah. Those were so good. From McDonald's? Those were good.

That's one thing I can eat. Yeah. Have you gotten one recently? Yeah. When do you and Dan go to McDonald's? When we're on the road and we want a fish sandwich. Yeah. It is good.

And we're allowed to. Yeah. I took Arlo to McDonald's recently. I like doing little touch screens And you just fill out your order Oh When you go inside We went inside

Oh But there's nothing for me there There is McCafe And they do have almond milk So sometimes I'll get a You know a latte You're amazing That you

I'm amazing Yeah Because of that Because you're a vegan I've accomplished so much more In my life No because you're vegan I think it's so hard

Oh Yeah it's not It's so hard. Oh, yeah. It's just hard. It's not. Well, I know. But cheese is a big thing. I could probably give up fish. I mean, but cheese is a big problem for me. I don't know.

And eggs. I have a lot of practice being anorexic, not eating things. Yeah. I don't find it. And when you're doing it for a good cause and not because you want to be thin, it's even more rewarding. Yeah, I bet it is. Or easier to do, I don't find it. And when you're doing it for a good cause and not because you want to be thin, it's even more rewarding. Yeah, I bet it is. Or easier to do, I guess.

It's just like I can easily make things that's not for me. I don't get that. Like it's off limits. Wait, say that again. I can easily just say something like, that's no more. Yeah.

You don't get that anymore. That's really amazing. Discipline, I guess. It's discipline. How you do that is... Thank God. I have a certain type of brain that's good at that. But it's discipline but how you do that is thank god i have a certain type of brain that's good at that but then in other ways i'm not i mean i'm like i still smoke weed and i wish i didn't do that and you know i still gotta have some eat skinny pop way more like i still indulge overindulge in things that i do allow myself to eat in ways it's not

overindulging if no that's the sneaky part You cut out the things that are bad for you, and then you overeat the healthy things to the point where you feel sick. I mean, no one should eat a whole thing of Skinny Pop. It's not because it's fattening or something, but I should not be consuming a whole bag of Skinny Pop in one day. Well, if you're not eating anything up until then, it's kind of like a meal.

I understand why it happens. Yes, it's happening because I'm hungry, but it's not a good thing to do for my body. I would never feed a child that. You know what I'm saying? Like, I would never be like, that's what I would feed Poppy for her whole lunch. She'll just eat a monster size of Skinny Pop

plus a bunch of other random bullshit. Like, I would feed someone that I cared about better things than that. So I have things that I'm not that disciplined about is what I'm saying. Right, but I don't think every once in a while eating a bag of popcorn is really- No, I don't care about it at all.

Actually, Taylor, the other day, was here yesterday and she was like, I just told Chris that yesterday I was hungover and I ate, I ordered a large Emo's pizza and that's all I ate the whole day was that pizza. And she felt so disgusted and I go, but that makes sense. You probably didn't eat, that's why you got so drunk.

You're starving. You didn't eat the day before and then you wake up the next day and you're starving and hung over like yeah you just want fats and like right just let yourself have it bread cheese yeah that's what you want you want what you want go taylor go and sometimes it makes you feel fucking sick and then you go maybe you're mad at yourself don't do that that's the worst part. Yeah. Getting mad at yourself. Yeah. Like, how do I get over that? Well, you, that's the,

that's the tough part. Um, you just, the healthiest version of myself will just say, well, that girl that, that overdid it or made or fucked up and ate too much or like did this really bad thing. She was just trying her best.

And that if you couldn't eat the whole bag of skinny pop then you really didn't do your best no then you wouldn't have but you didn't have it in you to not eat it you just had to eat it all and that's just the way it goes and maybe right now that you feel sick and you want to puke because you ate so much remember this feeling and remember like where you could have stopped that this feeling wouldn't have happened and maybe next time talk to yourself at that point and just wait a little bit. I never eat until I feel like I'm going to throw up.

Really? No. Oh, well. I mean, and I eat a lot. It's disgusting. You've never felt like you were going to throw up

because you ate so much? Not really. Oh. I mean, I feel like, oh, I kind of ate too much. I bet probably 20% of women

have that eating disorder. Once again, I do not throw up. What? I do not throw up. Oh, yeah, that's another thing. My mom does not throw up. That up that's the thing yeah so i don't get that feeling well have you ever tried did you ever try to be bulimic no really no was it not like a thing

when you were a teen i i know that i have an aversion to throwing up so i would never try you had never tried it even if you thought it worked. No. I think most women my age have it. I'm going to say most being 51%. Not all, but that's not 51%. More women of my age and

socioeconomic status or whatever, however I grew up American, have tried to throw up their meal from feeling so disgusting because they ate too much. I couldn't do it.

But I think a lot of times girls try to throw, are bulimic and it's not because they are going to throw up, they feel so sick they're going to throw up, even though that is a thing.

I think it's just to get rid of it. But I have, a lot of times, been so sick that I'm like, oh my God. Like I make myself literally like I have food poisoning sick from eating so sick that I'm like oh my god like I make myself literally like I have food poisoning sick

from eating too much I'm scared to throw up yeah so that's good that's protected you from yeah it has it's like heroin I probably would have done it Bethany Frankel says that she never eats she doesn't like feeling full so so she never gets too full and that's how she stays so thin is like she has an

aversion to feeling full and I'm like oh that's a nice thing to have boy let's get that into stays so thin. It's like she has an aversion to feeling full. And I'm like, oh, that's a nice thing to have. Boy, let's get that into our brain. Well, you almost have it. You have the aversion to throwing up. So being full will lead to that. Yeah, but that's not the same. Yeah, yours has a little. It goes past the full.

But speaking of Bethany Frankel, she sent me some wine that I'm going to give you. Oh, my God. She sent me a suitcase that's monogrammed with my name. I don't know. I did her podcast ages ago, but I just got it last week, so I don't know when. I would love it. Yeah, it's her wine. I forget the name of it, but it's like Naturally Young or something.

It's like some kind of, she has great branding. She has wine. Well, she has skinny. Yeah, of course she does. Skinny stuff. Yeah, yeah, but it's wine. There's a whole suitcase of wine. So she owns a vineyard?

I love her. Wait, you did her podcast? Yeah, but ages ago. Yeah. So I don't know if this I love her. Wait, you did her podcast? Yeah, but ages ago. So I don't know if this is a present from that because sometimes they'll send something for doing your podcast. Their podcast. Like a gift, which is always nice. But this just kind of came out of nowhere. So she

might have just launched this wine and is just sending it to all of her friends or people that she's, you know, might be influential people. But I'm going to give it to you we're gonna we'll film a little video put it on my i love it okay we'll go do that okay thank you for listening to the podcast mom thank you for being here oh god thanks for asking me thanks to gilly for gilligan's island that's her name by the way i don't think i said it she's we gotta find out

oh she's exhausted i'm so glad and cute oh my god it's it's so exhausting being this cute okay guys thank you for listening um live shows coming up this cute. Okay, guys. Thank you for listening. Live shows coming up this weekend. Cleveland, Indianapolis. See you there. Then I think Massachusetts after that. So many tour dates. NikkiGlazer.com.

I love when besties show up. You know I love you there. I love you. Thank you for listening to the show. And we'll see you tomorrow. Bye. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

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