The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #479 Losing Recipes, Nikki Can't Be on The Ground & Brian's Nuts

Episode Date: October 10, 2024

Nikki is definitely not one of those millennials who’s all about hating on Gen Z. In fact, she’s totally obsessed with the way they use language. Brian worked on Tim Dillon’s This Is Your Country and spent the entire week it dropped just scrolling through every comment on the internet. Nikki’s the go-to for all the insider tea on reality TV. After hanging out all day with her BFF, who just became a mom, she compared lactating boobs to sick dogs. Plus, Nikki had the time of her life in Ontario, performing for the biggest crowd she’s ever seen! While chilling at home with her niece and nephews, Nikki realized her nephew's wild behavior was actually just his quirky way of showing affection. In The Final Thought, Nikki wishes she can be as care free as Brian is in front of Big TV Executives. Subscribe to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts to get this episode ad-free, and get exclusive bonus content: https://apple.co/nikkiglaserpodcast  . Watch this episode on our Youtube Channel: The Nikki Glaser Podcast Follow the pod on Instagram for bonus content: @NikkiGlaserPod Leave us your voicemail: Click Here To Record Nikki's Tour Dates: nikkiglaser.com/tour Brian’s Animations: youtube.com/@BrianFrange More Nikki: IG More Brian: IG More producer Noa: IGSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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The Nikki Glaser Podcast. The Nikki Glaser Podcast. Here's Nikki Hello, here I am, welcome to the show, it's the Nikki Glaser Podcast Excuse me while I put on my lip gloss Which all the Gen Z's are wearing Oh wait, I have mine too, hold on They can't go anywhere without it Is that a Gen Z thing?

That is what I'm told by Gen ZM. I put it on my Instagram story this week that Gen ZM had written to me that like, one thing to know about, hold on, let me read it in her voice. One thing to know about Gen Z. I gotta find it. I just am, she's hilarious to me. My friends are starting to be like, you have to check with her about everything you buy.

And I'm like, no, it's not like I'm like, won't get something. Cause she says, no, I just, it's funny to get her confirmation.

It's content. It's, it's giving like fun relationship between two people from different generations who just want to understand each other. I am not an old person totally right i am not a millennial who's like mad about gen z i think that is such a late i'm like working on a bit about it in my act about how like every generation like hates the younger generation because they're jealous you're young but they't say that, so they make fun of how you talk and what you wear,

because we hate that our skin looks gross and yours doesn't, and that we're closer to dying than you are. But we can't say that because it's embarrassing to admit that that's the real fear, and we get mad at you. And that you have a life that you can do so many things we didn't do. We blew past opportunities to socialize and go out and maybe meet people. Maybe Gen Zs are single and we're stuck in marriages we don't like. Instead, we just go like, they talk in this weird...

Why are they talking like that? We didn't talk like that. A good point was raised in my girls' chat that Sarah Lena said that millennials did not have as many different slang words as Gen Z did when we were the reigning young generation. I feel like we did have a good amount, but maybe not as much.

Can you remind me of some? Because I don't think we had that many. Cowabunga. Cowabunga was Gen X. Rad was Gen X. Tubular was Gen X. As If. Showed me with a fork. Groabunga was Gen X. Rad was Gen X. Tubular was Gen X. As If. Showed me with a fork. Groovy. Groovy was co-opted retroactively by

Awesome Powers. Check out those gams. Yeah, so you're struggling. We don't really have it. But anyway, so another Gen Z thing. We never go anywhere without a gloss in hand. Bathroom, car, another country, lip gloss. But a balm gloss gloss but a balm gloss but a balm gloss we love summer fridays and lineage those are the two brands and i gotta say lip gloss

is with the finger bomb is like i guess it's less of a yeah no it's like the tube it comes in like less of a like like you take it out and it's a wand and more of like i don't know what she meant by bomb i could ask but you know she might get back to me even before i ask because that's how fast she is um so it might take uh less than uh it might take negative time to find out so i don't know if we want to go there but i think what she meant is like a goo like it comes out like gooey so i got i got tower 28 or whatever that brand is lenege and summer fridays and i gotta admit they taste really delicious and yeah because you do end up eating them and it does give you a nice i've always said if i could eat my makeup i'd probably use it more often yeah and and you do eat it you absorb it

in your skin and you eat whatever is on your lips is transferred into your body but when you go camping you're supposed to bring like five gallons of water and like six lip glosses just in case you get lost in the works yeah and in case there's a photo shoot that you come across with some gnomes well that's you know the the uh the sign of good slang is that it becomes just like normal language and i think a lot of the millennial things that we considered there we consider them normal now but they're actually slang okay hit me like you know like the word cool like that's cool was slang once for like right like the silent i don't know who said it but yeah some generation like the silent, I don't know who said it, but some generation, like

the silent generation came back from World War I and was like, radio, that's pretty cool. And everyone else before them were like, cool? That's like idiotic. Cool means cold. Now it's just like in the, but here's some millennial words that. Oh, I did see a water

container in a gym today or the other day that said hot. These are options. Hot, cold, cool. Okay. What do you make of that? It's a little too much. Like it was a container?

Like, you know, it was like a big, like, you know, the kind of thing that you talk around in the office and you talk about the latest episode of Friends the other night. Oh, okay. Okay. Water cooler. Yes. You can get hot cold and cool i took a picture of it because i was so confounded by the options i understand cool and cold are two different things i think cool was supposed to be in the is in the middle but maybe your water comes out wearing sunglasses and i mean that that seems really uh specific i thought you would like that okay so tell us some i just i think i don't think i would i think cool is probably room temp yeah i just

don't i don't like it because i think it's too many options i don't believe that cool is actually anything and who is hot water in a gym yeah that's probably andrew huberman because it says it's probably good for you to do if you want to know what's good for you do what doesn't feel good all the time yeah by andrew huber stare into the sun as soon as you get up in the morning take a cold plunge uh sit in silence a, uh, what's it called? There's some kind of walk he talks about where you have to like look across the land. So you're,

if you're ever seeing a guy walking around your neighborhood, slowly scanning the horizon back and forth with his neck, he's not a perv. He listens to Andrew humorous podcast and also might be a perv. Um, and it just fits the protocol. But I was listening to like what you have to do in the morning to feel good, your best, by his protocol. Which isn't, it's not insane, but you do have to stare at the sun for 15 minutes in the morning.

Really? He says stare at the sun? Yeah. You need to get sunlight in your eyes. Yeah. You can't wear sunglasses. You have to go outside and just get all that in. Science has told us that that's bad for you for like a thousand years yeah even

on an eclipse get it in get it in you'll be blind but you'll feel real are you serious no it's totally true listen he's telling us okay after you read us millennial phrases look up andrew huberman protocol for your daily life but i do want to hear millennial phrases because here's the thing you're right they do become a part of the way we talk and that is why i'm obsessed with gen z phrases is because i think some of them are fucking awesome and as soon as they inject themselves in my brain in a way that becomes like i don't have to think that i'm doing it i'm i'm gonna be set to describe so many new things. For instance, like this new thing of like saying dead, dead, I'm deceased.

Call Tyler Henry. Like get seven of my friends to carry me into a grave. Like that, just like those different versions of saying you are passed on. I like it. Sure. I like it. And I think it's here to stay. Are we going to talk about that?

Oh, Tyler Henry. Yeah, we can definitely talk about that. Okay. So run us through. Okay. So here's just a list that I found on the internet.

And by the way, we're old millennials, or at least I am. Brian, you're a few years younger. Well, I'm old. I'm the oldest.

Oh yeah. You're the oldest. Okay. So these might seem young to us. Bay. Gay? Bay. B-A-e like oh bay yeah that that actually was good good job yeah that came and went stands for um well i see it uh i know actually no before anyone else uh okay that sucks okay yeah all right um basic basic okay yeah yes very good love basic really what a great word that didn't have a way to describe that before i guess you could say But no, basic is lame, boring, pedestrian.

But basic is just really, yeah. It really encapsulates what we want to say. Because it has a little bit of an insult attached to it. Yeah. Yes. Something's basic. It's the lowest form. Yeah.

Yeah. No one wants that. Adulting. Uh-huh. Okay. Don't love it but it definitely adding in to the two words two nouns yeah became a thing that we did adulting i hated it i always have i don't know why and anyone who uses it that's fine um but yeah uh i was this year's old when I found out whatever. That one really irritates me.

I feel like a lot of our slang came from Twitter. We all like started to. Yeah. And I think Gen Z is probably getting theirs from the internet as well. No, what they're doing is they're getting it from TV and different TikToks. So like the one I was telling the girls chat about the other day was a, so I saw, I was listening to Lost Cultures, the latest episode with these girls

that have a podcast called The Haters. And that's going to be a new podcast I listen to to understand Gen Z culture. But they were dropping. It was like I was listening to a foreign language. It was like when your teacher used to play you like French tapes and you would have to like listen during class and like take a test. I was like glued your teacher used to play you like French tapes and you would have to like listen during class and like take a test.

I was like glued to the audio trying to decipher things because every other word was something new. So at one point they said they were talking about old feuds in pop stars or between pop stars. And they said Nicki Minaj and Cardi, I believe, were the last like feud where there was like you know fist thrown hands were thrown now hands were thrown is not what I'm talking to that's already one that was probably more a millennial thing so they said that was probably the last celebrity you know pop star girly feud where hands were thrown and then one of the girls said, and they left no recipes. They left no recipes. And then one of them repeated left no recipes.

And so when Bowen repeated no recipes, I was like, okay, this is not just this girl saying something that doesn't maybe she got the phrase wrong or something. It's a real thing. So I Googled it. No, nothing literally left no recipes. I don't know what they're talking about then I asked emily And she said this one's actually interesting and this is why I love This etymology of gen z lingo So I guess there was a tiktok where some conservative moron was talking about how women

have become too bold and empowered and they you know in the workplace and they don't like cook anymore and they don't they're not housekeep you know they don't homemakers and and stay-at-home moms and so women now um the the recipes have been lost their moms did not give them the recipes they there's been no recipes passed down and so gen z took that as like they they left the recipes or the right it's something with recipes i forget the exact phrasing but i like that they took this thing that this guy said that everyone was just like what are you talking about but it makes sense like the moms didn't give the recipes how to make the cookies and the women are now being like well just uber eats them right and that's somehow and then genzy co-opted it and made it a positive thing and just turned it into a thing of like when you don't

when you don't teach the next generation something that's i mean i guess they they didn't like to take it back from him they just used it the way he used it. But I like that they got it from some guy. I like that it comes across. I like that they just hear something somewhere and then it gets passed around. This could be like the genesis of a new slang that will blow up. They all got to start somewhere.

Yes. I think I like etymology and where words come from and why we use them. This is why I've become fascinated by it. If you guys ever, if besties ever learn about a Gen Z term and where it comes from or something interesting or something new your kid is saying, please DM me with it. I love it so, so much. If we could figure out what no recipes actually means, I do feel like that's a good one. No, that's what it means.

It means the recipes weren't passed down. So I would say like if, if you know, Oh, so let's say when Noah was gone and, um, what's her name? Jesus Christ.

I'm so sorry. Olivia, Olivia stepped in. I've had one hour and 20 minutes sleep for everyone to, to know, but I'm feeling great. Don't worry about me. I really am

I hate when people on podcasts are like I haven't slept and I feel like shit and you're like well then I don't want to listen to this shit but I feel good so when Olivia stepped in if Olivia would have been like I don't know how to run this thing we would have been like Noah left no recipes

is that really because then it's then it's just like instead of no instructions it's just a cooler way to say it like it's just a cooler way to say no instructions maybe yeah it's just like you didn't pass down the information that you had to make the next generation know like how to do things we've lost the institutional knowledge is what the slang should be there yes not as quippy and fun but um i thought it had something to do with receipts which when that when receipts came out on this this the the lingo i did not understand what it was like i need receipts and now receipts is like we all say it like i mean it's amazing it it really makes sense

that's one that like at first it was a little clunky putting it on like a pair of new shoes i had some blisters like i i was struggling like saying it now i could say it and my parents would probably understand i love it i mean i feel like we're having a lot more fun with language these days in america yeah i think so english has all of a sudden gotten fun i mean i let's talk about um this is your country the special that brian show ran tim dylan's uh this is your country uh cracked the netflix top 10 it did for two days for two days which is incredibly competitive this week i mean this is maybe the most competitive week i've ever seen on netflix number one sweeping the nation is the adam brody kristin bell rom-com uh nobody wants this which has been at number one for a long time

everybody loves that show it's at the the nation i watched two episodes for a rom-com the only because hollywood stopped making rom-coms that were good they put out one or two a year they all star sydney sweeney and they were just looking for something that i think the world was ready for like a real good rom-com and man here's my thing about nobody wants this i was watching it and i was like if i pitched a tv show to my team and was like and i want the romantic lead to have a podcast oh god everyone would say no that's a bad idea. Because Sex and the City just did it.

And it was mocked on Sex and the City. So don't do it. What I've learned from Nobody Wants This is that you should do things other people have done. Because it means it works. Works. And I'm not saying it's derivative or that they stole it from it. But having a podcast is a thing for a girl to do now, like many,

many people. So it should be a job that can like be repeated. Like, I feel like anytime I try to put together a TV show, it's like, that's been done. Well, that's been done.

It's like, well then we should do it and do it our way. Right. And it's fine. But I was just kind of like fuming and there was some blood coming out of my ears from the thought of like, now I can't be a podcast co-host on the show that i pitch even though that is what i would want to do but guess

what yes i can i'll do it again i don't give a fuck but i think it's a really cute show i'm really enjoying it um i've made it two episodes in and um i just don't have much more to say about it than that I'm watching it with a lot of jealousy because I'm like I wish I wrote this yes I did so were you an Adam Brody fan hell yeah I was always a Brody boy I never was into the other guy

he was too bad he was too quiet he was too subdued Adam Brody was funny and he seemed to pine for Summer's character which is always an attractive quality when the guy's not trying to be too aloof and i like brody now i like him now too i think he's very charming i think they have great chemistry and kristen bell i'll watch that girl do anything i love her face i love her facial expressions i love her acting style i love justine lupe loop loop i think her name is who plays her sister i love um his sister played by why now i can't think of her name even though

she's my friend the really caustic one oh my god i'm so sorry that i can't remember your name right now she dated she dated kyle dunnigan and wrote glassman she's jackie uh jackie what god this is a really bad example that my brain isn't working because she's actually a friend of mine and jackie tone and she's the best name ever jackie tone right um she's so funny in it i think it's great um but uh so yeah that was everyone's been watching that yeah um and my feelings are just jealousy that like oh god this is the only show on netflix that i could see myself having pitched or or being able to write and um i feel like i missed the boat but i you know what i don't want to make a show or i would so just let them have success and i'm happy for uh um everyone involved and i'll keep watching and not make it about me so tell me

then when there's love is blind so yeah so number one was that sweeping the nation and then um the day after this is your country came out the love Is Blind season seven came out and that was obviously going to take up the top five. Enough of that show. Enough. We don't need any more. These are all failed couples that will never make it. The experiment is over. It doesn't work.

Everyone regrets. There's been no successful couples out of Love Is Blind? Maybe Lauren and what's his name off the first season, no one there's been no successful couples out of love is blind i don't think maybe lauren and um what's his name off the first season but since then not i don't really think so i just i fell out of love for that show because i was just like these people don't really know each other this is a complete manipulation to get people to fall in love fast i've seen it happen before i'm kind of disenchanted with it now i guess it's kind of like a counterpoint to what you were saying before but something that grinds my gears is like when something works and then it's like they just stretch it out like with love is blind they did all these seasons and they

did the one in brazil and mexico it's like okay i get it yes the one thing i will say was interesting about that and i didn't watch all the, you know, different cities around the country, but Anya did. And she said, it was really interesting to see how people date in other countries, how, and same with love Island. I've heard that British women do not sleep with a guy for so long and they do not kiss.

They don't get cuddly. Like they won't give it up for anything. And I like it. And I bet, I don't know how they got that advice to not do that stuff too soon. But they're living the right life. OK, we're going to finish up this conversation about this is your country because I want to talk about it. It was so good. And and I want to hear all the other stuff that got impeded your way from being number one.

Right after this. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. The Daily Show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture. You get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment,

politics, sports, and more from Jon and the team of correspondents and contributors. The podcast also We'll be right back. wherever you get your podcasts. All right, so we got Love is Blind. We got Nobody Wants This. Yeah, the season finale of The Circle came out. We have Nicole Kidman's show, The Perfect Couple, which is still up there. That was still raining.

Yeah, we had Emily in Paris, which we wound up overtaking, actually. But that was on there for seven weeks. The Vince McMahon documentary. Oh oh i hear that's good and then um the menendez brothers uh monsters menendez brothers doc couldn't watch more than five minutes of it too dark uh too acty people saying that people said that's not as good as the other monsters series which was dahmer oh dahmer was so good and i'm sure monsters is good i've heard people say it is good and they're like think you've got to watch it but i was just like i i don't think that this i i don't know if i like dramatizations of real things i kind of wanted to see a documentary about those two bros okay so this is your country so then we got knocked out by a uh this cartoon a really solid cartoon called digital circus which has a huge following on youtube they

released a youtube episode um a few years ago and it got 330 million views on youtube and What? And then Netflix picked it up. It's got international appeal, a lot of Spanish language fans. And now that's at like number four or something. How often are you checking this? Every five minutes. Truly? I'm serious. Since This Is Your Country has come out,

I think I've spent every five minutes of every day reading every single comment every single uh post every single reply that anyone has i think i've seen it all i i'm having trouble finding new things that people have said yes about it i've read thousands and thousands of comments tim dylan doing this no no he is not he is much is bill dixon your other no no but someone's got to do it someone's got well i'm learning a lot about reading these comments and reading all the reactions and things like that i'm sure you're learning some new slang yeah no is it making you happy? There are some.

So the response is overwhelmingly positive from regular people on the Internet. There are certain like little like hell holes of the Internet where people have like such extreme opinions. It's like mind boggling. And then every once in a while you see someone who has like a good note that i'm like oh i would take that note if we got more episodes of this that's where we're good that's where you get okay but i love seeing all the comments i'd say the overwhelming number one comment that we get let me guess yeah more tim no well i guess in a way it's more tim but that's the people were fake well they weren't that's not the number one comment that is i would say something that

people are discussing and people um it's interesting because people who say they don't like the show tend to also say that the people were actors and they were improvising and that it was a sketch show which is so frustrating and so annoying because it was not a sketch show illegitimate they just don't they can't accept the fact that tim uh sincerely tried to make a talk show with real people right right okay so what's the number one comment number one comment by a lot by magnitudes orders of magnitude is we want more episodes yes why is there only one episode is this seriously just one yeah i don't understand by that they were like are we getting a new one next week um it does feel like that like that's obviously what the show is is right there's

there is to be more so um hopefully that's something that's in in talks and i came to this realization like uh for the judging this show is really difficult because like imagine it's a it's a talk show it's a daytime talk show imagine if like the kelly clarkson show just released one episode and then you had to like review it well do you know the first episode of every tv show is awful not that this this was so funny i had the best time at the premiere watching it with like a huge room of people yeah that was so fun that was so cool thank you for coming to that oh my god well it was so fun to watch at the improv it was the the the premiere party kind of thing and tim

did stand up to introduce it and was so funny yeah as always my favorite and then um he introduces it and then i got to sit with right next to brian and ally his wife and then uh bill my great friend who also worked on it was in the room and um tim was miles away having dinner uh with a group of people because he like me i would want to get the fuck out of like i don't like to i would it would be my worst nightmare to screen something that I was in and watch people react to it. But if I would have watched it on my laptop at home, not as many laughs because I was just like,

I would have been studying it and distracted. I was just like locked in and it felt so good for me to see it kill so hard. People were fucking loving it. I think it was really good for all of you to see. Yeah, it was so good for me to see it kill so hard with everyone. People were fucking loving it. That was, I think it was really good for all of you to see. Yeah, it was really good.

We had definitive proof that people liked it. Everyone we screened it for said they loved it too. And that's the, that is the overwhelming consensus of the comments on online. If you look at like, you know, obviously there's haters everywhere and that's what I focus on. But if you look at like the comments on Instagram, haters everywhere and that's what i focus on but if you look at like the comments on instagram the comments on tiktok everyone's just like i love this this is amazing what a great concept um and yeah i'm very happy about that but

the one thing i was going to say that i learned the the woman's voice that's like are you serious are you serious are you serious it was is so grating to me but also so funny and her husband guy was so ridiculous and my favorite part was him describing hamster combat oh yeah my favorite thing about tim is that he's on everyone's side initially. You know, like he is rooting for these people who are bad people and he likes that they're bad. He's like he will tell them you're the worst person ever met in my life. But then he is encouraging and sweet. And like, you know, there are little parts that I loved, like when when the the the bigger girl was on and her mom, so this girl is like, my mom is meddling in my life. And she's constantly monitoring what I eat.

And she's like, a girl was like a plus size girl. And she wants to monitor what kind of coffee I get. And Tim's like, what kind of coffee? What do we get? And she's like, like a latte with like, I don't know, I get some pumps of stuff. And he goes,'re gonna pump it up you're gonna pump it like he was like he just was like on her side like we're gonna pump it up that was such an endearing moment tim is such an endearing figure but he's also so cutting and is almost like operating on an

intellectual level that no almost no one i've ever known is in and he can say things that no one even catches are hilarious but he also seems like he's on your side and he's on their side and he's one of them but he's also making fun of them he threads that line so perfectly he's the overwhelming consensus i saw was just more tim like let's just get tim interacting with America. And that's what the show was, essentially. And with some really funny characters, who, by the way, were not scripted, everyone.

Do you guys know how reality TV works? This is how it works. People come in with a story, and before they go out, producers tell them, here's the best way to tell the story. So sometimes they seem a little bit like um they're trying to remember how they were told to say it which is not telling it's not scripted it's just like hey we need to get the cold context of this in order for this

to work for the show so i think sometimes even on f boy island same producer they the guys would explain themselves in a way or that seemed like they were trying to remember a script in their head but it's really about what the producer told them like in order for this to be as clear as possible for people to understand your story we're not adding to it we're just telling you like let's let's say it in this order perhaps yeah i think that's where they look a little bit like deer in headlights oh i'm gonna fuck this up if i don't get this right i'm saying this away i maybe wouldn't say it but by no means has anyone ever told what to say all the stories were totally real oh

absolutely totally real like the guy that proposed he said i want to propose that was so funny um you know the the guy did lose two hundred thousand dollars investing in nfts he wanted to come on the show and confess to his wife because he's a fan of tim dylan and he thought saying it on the show would soften the blow which i bet it did yeah and she seemed to forgive him she seemed to forget i mean she was definitely pissed it was so funny when she walked out and was pregnant. It was just such a nice reveal. You guys killed it. I was just so proud of

you that night. And I was texting with Brian afterwards like, you can't deny what just happened. It killed in the room. You can't deny it. It's a success. And if it doesn't reach the top 10 of netflix because it was undecided at that point it it's it's niche it almost it'd be weird if it did i'm so glad it

did but it's it shouldn't be expected because it is so niche but it did and then and brian said to me if it if it makes the top 10 i will rejoice that is all the matter and then it reached number 10 and i go are you rejoicing and he was like well not quite yet and i'm like no you said you would no i didn't rejoice i still haven't rejoiced um i you know i i have high expectations and high hopes for uh things i do and i if they're not, if they don't reach, the only time I've actually ever been happy after a thing was the roast. This is the roast. Yeah.

Because that exceeds my expectations. That's the only time I've been happy after a thing too. Honestly, it's because it's the only time in my career. Also, it is, it is exceeded. I mean,

even every special I've taped, it's felt like, did we get it? I don't know. I, it just,. I mean, even every special I've taped, it's felt like, did we get it? I don't know. It's just, that was the, and maybe like a couple Conan appearances, I was like, I couldn't have done better, but you're right. It's set a bar for our lives.

That just, that magic was made that night. Not, and it was not all on me, not even close to all on me. It was just like a lucky night but um i think overwhelming this is a huge success and um you i i hope uh you've you've you're you're letting some of it in yeah um no i am and if you if you haven't watched it yet please go watch it but whatever you do don't hit play and watch it for five minutes and then stop it. It's better that you don't watch it at all instead of that.

We talked about that. That's why I haven't watched it yet. Because I literally only had like four minutes to watch it with the band stuff and family. So I was like, oh, I can't start it. Because I'm going to ruin the algorithm. I mean, I was with a new postpartum mom this weekend. I was with Kirsten in Kansas City. And like your tits are like the number one concern, like your tits filling with milk,

leaking milk, being needed to milk, making it's it is like it's like having a sick dog your tits are sick dogs that you constantly need to be monitoring cannot leave alone for making even 45 minutes without yet making little messes um you're gonna have to put like just a patch on it because it's just that's it's bleeding every or whatever you know like your tits are like a huge concern and it seems like so it seems so annoying to always have to um pump everywhere and all the time and and have them like filling up and being like oh god they're gonna blow um it was it's that that seems like it's so exhausting i couldn't imagine it's watching a tim dylan show it's supply and demand that's how it works yeah like when it does work that's what you were saying i would be mixing in formula

asap if i was a mom like i just couldn't it's too much it's it's it's a sick dog and i would wanted that dog to be healed but it's it's like it's How long do you have to deal with that for? Up to a year or more if you're weird. It really depends on what is the situation. Seven-year-olds are sucking on tits.

There's some women that go to four. Wow. Because as long as they're sucking, you will produce it oh i see yeah supply and demand supply and demand exactly yes well i saw a movie or a tv show or something where a woman's baby was taken from her or something and then she was like lactating and people felt really bad for her because she had no baby to does that happen some women will donate their milk also there's such thing as donor milk i can't believe we all came up on formula and no one questioned it and now it's like

it's truly insane if kirsten was like if a little droplet of milk falls it's like it's liquid gold and moms were just shaking up formula left and then what would they do with their actual with their actual well they stop producing it because they're not using it. If you don't use it, you lose it. Yep. How much could you sell your breast milk for? Again, it's donor, so you don't sell it. Oh, it's donor. You can't sell it on the black market?

It's like child porn. No offense, but that is the way child porn is. No one pays for it. They all just feel bad for each other, and so they just, like, give it to each other. I know that's a weird thing to drop. How did you find that out? Because of all the podcasts I listen to.

That was one of the most fascinating things that was, like, no one pays for child porn because they're all, like, dudes, we are the most weird people in society. We got to help each other out. And so it's all just like, they all get in these dark web kind of forums and they earn kind of seniority. And then the ones at the top get the best quote unquote.

It's just so sick. But I was shocked to learn there's no money in it. Wow. And so I go, what am I even doing this for? What was Epstein doing? Just, I mean, the Diddy stuff, nothing's really coming out of that camp. I've been waiting. Curiously quiet on the Diddy front.

Everyone is interested in pedophiles. Stop making me feel weird about being interested in hearing and reading about pedophiles everyone is chomping at the bit for ditty stuff yeah which is the what some of the craziest shit you will ever hear that is so morbid and so disgusting but people are like people can't wait for more stuff to leak and so don't come at me for being like kind of intrigued by this stuff in a sick way. And I'm not saying that either of you are saying that. I think that everyone is a pedophile. Like, I don't know. Like, my pedophile radar is like so totally up right now that I have a baby.

Oh, really? Why do you want to hold my kid? Why? Why do you want to change her clothes? Why do you want to change her diaper? It's like everything is like very questionable. Even women or just men? Everyone. Everyone.

Everyone. Really? Besides me and Avi. Do you think that's a common fear? Because I don't remember moms feeling that way. Like moms are just always handing babies off. Or is this like a new thing coming out with all the news of like how there are so many? I mean, I don't know.

I just know it's my thing. But I don't know. I can't answer that question. I think you're smart. Honestly. I just know it's my thing, but I don't know. I can't answer that question. I, I think you're smart. Honestly, why not err on the side of caution? It's crazy how much that's, that's percolated throughout.

Cause it's not like there's more pedophiles now than there was, but like, I remember like if you talk to like your parents generation or something like that, like back in the fifties, they would just let like, they were so naive. You would,

well, you would have your, your kid could get picked up by like a neighborhood guy who would drive you back home from school or whatever and that was fine yep oh i'm constantly getting picked up by other people parents that and um my dad told a story once that he um got approached by a guy when he was little that was obviously a creep that wanted to do stuff to him and was like hey kid get in the car like a classic situation like that and he was like you want to go um uh you want to go uh i have i have baseball equipment you like baseball because like every kid like baseball i guess he's like do you want to go watch baseball something about baseball and my dad was like nah i don't really like

baseball so my dad's like lack of interest in baseball like saved his life he was just like i don't really want to do like so the pedophile picked like the wrong thing for my dad well he picked music he should have had options like do you want to go look for arrowheads or paddle aimlessly down a river um yeah so he put all his stock in baseball if he just had different equipment in his car he should have at least had three sports in there. Yeah. What about hockey? Do you like hockey?

No. You can't murder a kid with a racquetball. Well, he doesn't want to murder, does he? Well, we don't know what his intentions were. Maybe. I was just making the joke that both the thing to lure the child was also the weapon. Yes.

Which is a sick thing to say but i'm a sick bitch um you know what this is a great place to take a break we'll be back after this and i'll tell you about my weekend a little bit john stewart is back in the host chair at the daily show which means he's also back in our ears on the daily show ears edition podcast the daily show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture. You get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment, politics, sports, and more from John

and the team of correspondents and contributors. The podcast also has content you can't get anywhere else, like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, else like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines listen to the daily show ears edition on the iheart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts i uh i did um what did i do this weekend i did so much this weekend friday night i was in windsor ontario which is right across the river from detroit i like did not know that canada like butted up to detroit like very closely yeah and

it's it's like it literally you could throw if you had a really good arm and a slingshot or a catapult you could throw a rock and hit a building on the other side like you could swim across the river and be like i I'm in Canada. Windsor was beautiful. I was at the Caesars Casino. I did not look into this gig in any way. I don't ever look into gigs. I just go, I know I'm going to a city.

I know it's going to be a theater. I know who's going to be there in terms of the people I'm working with. I hope fans show up. I don't know if they will. I can't control it, so I'm not going to look at ticket numbers. I'm not going to be there in terms of like the people I'm working with. I hope fans show up. I don't know if they will. I can't control it. So I'm not going to look at ticket numbers. I'm not going to, um, I'm not going to monitor it. And let me just say, most comedians are monitoring the fuck out of that stuff and being like, who's going to be there? How big is the show? What is, we walk into a venue and, um, you know, I'll walk in with my openers and the people will usually be like, do you want to see

the stage and it is a resounding yes and then i just keep walking to the green room i don't because i just i don't want to i don't want anything to come in that will make me nervous about it oh i think that's it and also i kind of don't care like it doesn't nothing's going to change my performance. Is it all the same to you at this point? You've been doing it for so long. So many different venues. It's like a blur.

I would like to say that, but I know people who have been doing it long too. And they're still interested in like, wow, look at the, the drapery or look at the architecture. Like I will perform in beautiful venues, but because I'm out there doing standup,

I'm distracted. So I can't really take in the ceilings and stuff. But everyone knows I'm not really into looking at buildings anyway. I heard Bill Burr, when he goes to a theater, he does that. He goes, look at the drapery. No, I'm sure he steps out and goes, wow, look, this is a beautiful place. But maybe not. But I will say that I did not at this location.

And maybe I should have because I did not look at the capacity of it and I stepped out and it is so many more people that I've ever played for wow it was like it was 5200 I think whoa sold out and I'm usually I mean I'm usually playing to like 1700s which is so many already 2000 yeah and then a couple 3000s here and there and so for this to be I was like what the fuck

um it was like a surprise party it was like an intervention for everyone to let me know that I'm famous but that didn't throw you off when you stepped out there right help um no no if anything it lit me up it was like oh my god like i felt like such gratitude and was like just energized by it it was so exciting beforehand and saw the number of seats this you wouldn't have gotten that boost yeah maybe not like maybe i would have gotten the boost when i saw the seats

and been like and the guys would have been like it it's sold out. I've been like it, it like maybe I would have had the boost before, but I had a new opener come with me because I didn't want to bring the whole crew to Canada because it just seemed like a hassle. So I had a Detroit comedian come over that was recommended to me. Her name is Camilla Bellario. And she was so funny and so poised and like just got out there. And I was like, oh, fuck, like this is some professional shit. And I was like, I got to raise my game because they instantly like loved her.

Like she was the headliner. And I was like, what's happening? Not that that doesn't she went out cold. Like I just this crowd was just amazing. But also she was so good. And she played guitar like she i just this crowd was just amazing but also she was so good and she played guitar like she would just pick up she's a trained operatic singer wow she's a folk singer she looks like casey musgraves she just gave birth four months ago and she was back she was so good camilla bellario everyone should follow her really funny songs but

she also like is a singer songwriter folk singer and um but she was backstage we were talking about having kids because she just had her first one i think she only is going to have one as far as i understood the conversation but she was saying um i was like yeah it's just you know it's not for me and she's like just do it she was like so casual about it she's like honestly it's not that hard everyone makes it seem like it's so hard because they need to like justify like i agree that they feel like exhausted by it like they want to get sympathy so they complain that it's hard but it's really she goes the first three months hell absolute hell she was like she was like pregnancy not fun giving birth literally the worst the worst thing i've ever done she was like it was not fun i Giving birth, literally the worst, the worst thing I've ever done. She was like,

it was not fun. I don't understand that when people like that process, it was the worst thing for me ever. And then three months, the first three months, absolute hell. I won't go into details why, but she had some really interesting things to say about it. And then she goes, and then it's easy. It's so easy. And I go, well, you're only one month out of that three months. You're four months. You've had a seven-year-old and you're like, and then it gets easy.'s so easy and i go well you're only one month out of that three months you're four months it's not like you've had a seven-year-old and you're like and then it gets easy i'm like it's been easy for a month for you but she had a good point of like with child care if you can afford it and um you know once they're babies and they're sleeping like but i understand that i really do think that i could get past how hard pregnancy is, how hard giving birth is, and being like a new

injured mother that has to like kind of like be with the baby all the time and have this. But, and I admire it so much and I am overwhelmed by how much hard work it looks. I think I could do it. I don't. I know for a fact I can't play with a kid. I am not. I can't be on the ground being like, this is a girl. Oh, I'm here to get cookies. You can't stay here that long. We don't even have cookies. Well, I want them. And then I'm done with the scene.

I don't know what else to do. And kids want you to keep like, I can't make things other things. I don't want to do voices. I don't want to be on the ground playing. They're not really following the storyline either. Like the storylines have to be so simple yeah that cookie thing is even too complicated like my niece if you did the cookie thing she would not be able to follow it i can do it for three minutes tops and even that's a very long sketch it's like an snl sketch i don't want to go longer than three minutes on a bit with but the kids want it to go over again again repeating

repeating yeah and i i know my limitations as a human being and um i i won't do that so noah how are you feeling about like are you excited to like do that kind of play because my sister's really good at it she will play with her kids for hours like that yeah and also you have to remember that every kid is different which is what i keep reading and it's a very positive message for right now at five months toby can do one thing for like maybe five if i'm lucky maybe i'll get 10 minutes and then she needs to like switch it up but what is the thing like just like putting a rattle in her face and being like look and like right like the rattle will be good for like i don't know a minute at most

tummy time or in her little bouncy chair and stuff like that so you just i constantly have to transition her into like different types of games she's in like a a workout class that's like 10 minutes on 10 seconds on weights then you go over here then there's recovery like it's it sounds like a orange theory uh yes babies like constantly mixing it up confused muscle confusion and then i add loud music and then she's an f45 class oh yeah right exactly well how does she like music she loves music yeah she loves singing she makes me feel like i'm mariah carey or something the video you sent of her singing when she was on your lap and she's just like in her own world she's like kind of like getting some emailing done and typing and she's like laying in noah's lap and noah um is like girls she's like singing right now and she's just like what was she even it was amazing i watched it

seriously i'm not joking you i watched it at least five times because it was so cute that she was singing i've never heard a baby sing i even played it for chris and he's like do babies do that and i'm like i don't think they do i think because we we just like sing to her all the time we just sing her stupid songs she's like i mean i've never heard of a baby singing i've never seen a video of a baby stops singing because she can almost feel like she's being watched and then you hear noah start typing again just to like everything's normal and then she starts singing again because she thinks the focus is off her it's so cute that was an amazing video like amazing I think that was really special

so you get moments like that and then they make the hard parts worth it yes but I also loved that video and I didn't have to do anything to get it but I understand thank you for the content

I get it it's like it seems um awesome i saw kirsten's baby this weekend she's not doing a lot um right now and uh wasn't real didn't look at me i don't think even once she was really interested in lauren because i think lauren my sister has like dark hair so she was kind of like what's this dark haired dark like two months they don't see much she's just kind of seeing these orbs. Okay. She didn't appreciate my act. Yes.

No, she was so, so cute though. And just so little. And like her, I just can't, I can't get over how like smooth their skin is. Oh,

it's so full of. Cause I saw Toby last week and I was just rubbing her feet being like, why are there no calluses? Keep them this way forever. It's so nice. I'm not buying this kids are easy thing. No. What about when they're two and three and they're running around and they're screaming and they're jumping in the pool? I am witnessing that. Did I tell you that my nephew told me to shut up?

No. Oh my God. Lauren, I'm, you'll understand me telling the story and Arlo, when you listen, when you're older, I love you,

but he, uh, we were at the park the other day and we were like, I'll, I promise this gets interesting. You guys, I know this is baby talk and people are probably zoning out, but, um,

so we were at the park and there's, my sister has kids a two-year-old a four-year-old and a seven-year-old two-year-old five-year-old seven-year-old and the two-year-old is out of control you tell him one thing he does the opposite he is i literally told her i feel like he is auditioning for problem child too like if you if you told me that, if you just, you know, whenever a kid, there's a scenario where it's like, if this were on a TV show,

I'd probably stop watching because I'd be like, it's too much. Like, we get it. He's a bad kid. Like, you don't need to make him that bad. That's how Forrest was acting. He's insane.

Forrest Green. What was he doing? Just like, no! Not doing that. Like, if you go, we're gonna go here. No! And then would sit down. Then he'd hit the dog. Then he would grab the ball from the dog and throw it in the pond. Even though we're like, don't throw it

in the pond. Throws it in the pond. Takes the pizza that someone's eating. I want that! Then takes it, throws it on the ground. Literally everything bad you could do, he was doing. Because he's just in that stage. So Arlo, who's seven, is like, let's go to the park. So we're by this pond. So it's like this hike to this park, probably like a quarter mile across this park.

And we go and I have the dog with me and I'm like, yeah, let's go to the park. Then there's an ice cream truck on the way. And Arlo's like really like, I want to go to the park. And we're like, let's not go to the park, buddy. It's a too far walk. He's like, I want to go. And park and we're like let's not go to the park buddy it's a too far walk he's like i want to go and so we we're like okay fine we're good we're going so we're so excited to go to the park we're gonna play i'm walking ahead with them lauren's dealing with forest who is like given up and is just sitting down and being like he's literally sitting with his arms crossed like i'm not going because of

something and then he poops and poop is coming out of his pants there's droplets of poop and then matt used my chopstick method with some mulch to pick up a forest poop which is hilarious they're so funny this family they just everything is funny like they they just they live with it they flow with it it is not a stressful situation it sometimes is but they're never like i can't do this anymore they just laugh about everything that's happening so we get to the park we see the ice cream truck both poppy and arlo were like i want it and they're like no we have candy at home you're not getting that you didn't even eat your dinner and they're like but i want it and then they start in with this like instant fake crying which i see through immediately anytime poppy does it i just do it back to her

she'll be like and i go i go i can do that too it's you're not it's not real no one starts crying like that on a dime let's like work on your acting style to get things in life because no one's gonna believe you going from smiling to right away so i'll do it back to her and then it'll she'll like look at me like so confused so i was giving him some of that bullshit and then right we get to the park and they're still crying and they're refusing to play in the park they're just like ah they're like stomping around and there's a whole park to be played with i have the dog with me final thought um these little cute girls come up to me to like be like, can I pet your dog?

And then they also want to play with Poppy, which is so adorable when kids come up and are like, can I play with you? Like so cute. And Poppy's just like now because she wants ice cream. And then they're petting the dog. And I'm like, oh, you know what? These are my new nieces. I'm going to talk to these girls and they are sweet and they want to pet the dog and they're interested in the dog. So I'm just like, you know, I didn't do that.

But I was trying to be like, this rewarded i'm like yeah you can meet them oh she really likes you you know like these girls are so cute and they're looking at poppy like she's like the cool girl because she's a little bit older than them and poppy's just like and then arlo is still just stomping around and it's getting to the point where it's like well i'm gonna i go i'm gonna go because this isn't fun. And Lauren's like, Nikki's leaving. You guys are just being you're you're chasing her away. And I was like, you don't need to make it about that. Like, I just don't want to hang.

This isn't fun, you guys. And I go, Arlo, here's the thing. We just you just put up a fight for us to go to the park because you wanted to play so badly. And then we did it. And now we're here and you're not even playing because you're worried about the ice cream. You ruined the, you initially wanted the park and you can get ice cream at home.

And I know that sometimes if you cry enough, you get ice cream. It's never going to work this time. And he's like, I'm going. And I go, well, go barter something because you have no money and no funds and no one's going to give you anything. So try to pick some rocks up or something

because maybe that guy will like exchange it for you and so he goes shut up and like i didn't hear what he said because i was still talking to him and my sister and matt looked like shocked and they're go you don't talk to her that way and i was like what do you say and they were like they told you to shut up and i was like no way and i was like i loved it because it told me that he looks it's not good that he did it but he talks to me the same way he talks to his parents thus he lacks respect for me much like he lacks respect for his parents he loves me as much as he loves his like because we all know how we talk to our parents I used to tell my parents to shut up that is not a good thing I still probably do I'm still I am a born and raised brat.

Okay. I'm having a brat summer. I'm having a brat life. And I was a brat to my parents. I would tell them, shut up. I would be like, I hate you. I would storm off. I would say things that I remember my friends witnessing and being like, I could never talk

to my mom that way because I wasn't scared of them because they didn't actually like punish us. And I didn't respect them. I was a bad kid, but God, I would have never talked to my aunt or my, or my grandma and grandpa, the way I talked to my parents. It is a different thing entirely,

or my teachers ever, ever, ever. But then, so to me, that made me feel like I'm never going to have kids, but at least my niece and nephew see me in the same way they're close enough to me not in an

aunt way of like we have to be on our best behavior around her like they I get free with you I feel yeah I have a relationship with them that is actually better than the one I had with my aunts and uncles even though I'm getting told to shut up and he did throw a pebble at my face in anger

close enough maybe I'll start hitting you. I think, oh, they, they already are doing that. But I liked it because I was like, it made me feel like their parent a little bit. Like I'm dealing with the same stuff and except that I literally go,

okay, well I'm leaving. And then I just started walking away and then they started crying again because they do like when I come around. But it just felt good that that happened. And, you know, to defend them, Arlo and Poppy and Forrest, if you're listening in the future, I'm not mad that you tell me to shut up or that you throw things or that you cry when you don't get things.

Because if kids, I keep telling my parents who are having frustration with it with them, if they had another thing to do instead of that, they would, they don't. And it's not my sister's fault. It's not Matt's fault. It's like someone's dropping the ball somewhere along the line. We don't know where,

but kids only use what they have. And if their only thing is to yell, shut up, they're going to only use that. It's not like they're evil kids. They just don't have another thing. It not like they're evil kids they just don't have another thing it's like their toolbox is empty else they can't like write a letter yeah there are other ways that they like kids talk that are their age that aren't that but they don't

they don't have it yet and so i can't be mad at them because i even said to arlo honestly i would be so annoyed with my logic too if i was him being like if i had an aunt being like just enjoy the thing that you wanted initially like i'd be like shut the fuck up aunt nikki so i kind of i go i get it arlo did him like that that's good parenting nikki thank you i understood where he came from and um i yeah it's it's but it's it's it is not easy. That is all I'll say about it. It is not easy being a parent. Shout out to parents of young kids like I see you.

I want to hear your stories. If you have any tips for how my sister can get her kids to not like disobey, it's really hard because, you know, they it's like either having three kids screaming crying for hours or you give them the cookie they want or even if they're not screaming and crying even if they're just sitting in a carriage it's hard like i took my brother took my niece to the park you have to have like you have to like pack like you're going on a weekend camping trip whenever you take the baby out of the house yes you have to apply sunscreen like every 10 minutes you have to make sure that they have a little juice pouch or whatever those things are you've got to have little naps and wet wipes and because brian i will brian is so funny we will be like in the middle of a very important meeting with like executives and he'll be we'll like be looking at a new space where we're going to be doing this live show and and and meeting these

people for the first time and brian's like yeah i've got a question he opens his fanny pack and pulls out a bag of nuts and he's popping nuts while he's talking to these amazon executives so you loved bagged nuts you always have like a bag snack. Sure. I feel like you would be, you would be good at being a parent. Cause you have like good supplies on you. Sure.

Sure. I didn't even realize that that was, it wasn't a thing that I was like, Brian needs to clean up his act. I was just like, I want to be more like this where I just moved past the, the idea that anyone's important oh get me there everyone's a human being and at the end of the day i'm sorry i said that but

ultimately everybody was a little baby in a carriage telling their aunt to shut up and now they're just here for whatever reason yes and i whenever i meet someone who's like supposedly super important or whatever i try to talk to them like they're just another human being and that has that just eliminates this like this whole facade that we're all putting on obviously there are certain people who are more touchy than others and like if you like you have to walk on eggshells around certain people but when it comes to like meeting important people i just feel like you're just a guy who like got a job you're just a guy who's good at a sport yeah and you're good at a sport because your body was born that way and you like it's just there's nothing it's really funny when people are treated like royalty because they're good at acting what right but everything every person that is treated like that is because they

are making people money it's only that no one actually likes them more because of any other reason yes there are people out there like adam sandler who both make people money and are nice people that people like to be around or whatever. But ultimately, no matter how nice Adam Sandler is, it does not matter if he's not making people money. People would not want to be around him as much like people are upset. You can break down any person in a room. And I'm in a lot of rooms where it's very clear who's the most important person. And I'm a person that has started making people money. And I see how much more people laugh at my jokes and like everything i say and it's because i make them money it's just so it's really pathetic when you think about it but that is a it can get distorted too that's worth now

you might not trust what how people react anymore like eventually everyone everyone's giving you positive feedback because they fear oh deborah vance season three hacks she's on stage just doing premises and she goes why are you laughing because she's so famous yeah and that is something that a lot of people uh go through as comedians where they just get so famous that anything they say gets a laugh and then eventually people catch on and go you're what you're not funny at All right. We got another episode to do that will come out tomorrow on the heels of this. So you'll hear more of this conversation right after this meeting tomorrow. Thank you for listening, besties.

Tour dates coming up. Hershey, Pennsylvania this weekend. Somewhere else. Wilmington. Am I going to North Carolina? No. After Hershey, Pennsylvania, you will be in fort lauderdale whoa will you though i don't know if you will wait am i only in hershey this weekend you have

oh i'm in syracuse sorry syracuse um friday and saturday and then hershey on sunday and then next week i um i'm at andrew's wedding and i'm going to ari's tour and then um on uh friday uh the 25th i'm in fort lauderdale and i'm uh in fort myers on the 26th those all those florida things i'm worried about andrew's wedding even because this hurricane is coming in hard i heard a meteorologist cry when he was talking about it did you see that that? It was very upsetting. No, I mean, this is the most powerful this is as powerful a hurricane as you could possibly have on planet Earth. No, it's already gone down

though. I saw it to like I think category three. Oh, really? It went down? It's rude that I just worry about the birds and animals that don't know what's going on and can't like pick up their nest and go i'm gonna go stay with my aunt in georgia fly away but they leave behind their babies you can't fly with your

babies that's true the babies are gonna go but the that's true it makes me i like i i can't handle it when i think i've been dreaming about drowning uh animals the past three nights because of this. Because I just think anytime it rains or anything, I'm just thinking of like when there's a storm that's like blowing through. I'm just thinking of like an animal being like, oh, when's this going to stop? You know, like if you walk in the rain to your car, how miserable you are. Can you imagine being a fucking animal? And the only shelter you have is like some leaves. And it's cold too.

And there's no end in sight. There's no like, oh, as soon as I get this blanket. Or as soon as I get in like a hot shower, I'll be fine. Yeah. Nature blows, man. Yes. No, that's true. I mean, I don't know how an animal feels when a storm comes.

But I do know that animals have been in nature since the beginning of nature. Not in a change. Well, now now it's much worse. Well, there's no. Yeah, it's actually horrible. I actually have horrible. So much worse. I heard some horrible stories about when there were the forest fires in Colorado about how the the deer or whatever.

And we've got to go. Thank you so much for listening. I can't literally can't handle any story of animals being hurt or, uh, scared, but, uh, yeah,

I'm sure it was, I'm sorry to cut you off. I really can't handle it. I'm sure. I'm sure. Um, Oh dear. Oh,

dear. Um, pray for the deers, pray for the animals, pray for Florida, pray that this thing fucking gets knocked down. Some miracle happens and it keeps getting knocked down and it comes through and it is just a slight nice breeze and um there's not 26 trillion dollars i think it was like something like 146 billion dollars of damage in north

carolina the thing about the north carolina thing is no one in ashville was ever scared of hurricanes at least i would think the average person would be like, we're going to be affected by a hurricane. Not us. If you look at Ashland on a fucking map, y'all, and I did say y'all, you would never think a hurricane could affect it. And I know it's because of the flooding up in the mountain, whatever. You would just not predict this. It's coming for us all. And all we have until then is podcasting. So we'll see you on tomorrow's. Don't be good. Bye. The Nikki Glaser podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and I Heart Podcast, created and hosted by me, Nikki Glaser, co-hosted by Brian Frangie, executive produced by Will Ferrell, Han Sani and Noah Avior,

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