The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #489 Nikki’s Grammy Nomination, Overcoming IBS & The Fall of Ai Models w/ Julie Glaser

Episode Date: November 15, 2024

Julie Glaser is sitting in today. Nikki makes the case for why Besties wouldn’t want her to have high self-esteem—and why that actually benefits her career. Nikki’s nominated for a Grammy, and Brian is feeling confident she'll win this one. She thinks it’s all a bit of a joke, but what’s not funny is the person who totally stone-faced her. Julie’s still processing the first few times Nikki got in trouble for dropping curse words. Julie’s lungs are looking amazing now that she’s 15 years smoke-free. It really hits different when your health takes a turn for the worse—Julie didn’t even consider this when she was younger. Brian opens up about the one thing that helped him overcome IBS as a kid. After discussing positive associations, Nikki feels like she’s finally leveling up her texting skills, thanks to Gen Z Em. On the set of a high-end fashion photoshoot, Nikki shares the best advice she got about posing for a professional photographer. Somehow, this sparks an epiphany about the rise and fall of AI-generated models. Nikki and Brian dive deep into why the "binge-watch TV" model is no longer working in today's world. Final Thought: Nikki is officially giving up on trying to convince her mom to stop slinging mud with a broken body. Subscribe to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts to get this episode ad-free, and get exclusive bonus content: https://apple.co/nikkiglaserpodcast  . Watch this episode on our Youtube Channel: The Nikki Glaser Podcast Follow the pod on Instagram for bonus content: @NikkiGlaserPod Leave us your voicemail: Click Here To Record Nikki's Tour Dates: nikkiglaser.com/tour Brian’s Animations: youtube.com/@BrianFrange More Nikki: IG More Brian: IG More producer Noa: IGSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late-night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Here's Nikki. Hello, here I am. Welcome to the show. It's the Nikki Glaser Podcast.

My mom is in studio today. Hi, Nikki. Hi, mom. in studio today. Hi, Nikki. Hi, mom. Hi, everybody. Hello, everyone. Animal leopard print. Brian Frangie's here. Noah's here. Was that song in 1.1 speed or am I going insane?

1.1? Did that feel like it was slightly faster? Like one-tenths faster? I feel like I'm losing my mind. I mean, that is really an imperceptible amount of speed more. I feel like you start to notice when it's 1.25, but below that, I think you could trick everyone. Except when you're listening to comedy,

because laughs go, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. When you're listening to stand-up because i always speed it up and then the laughter sounds insane but the person sounds sounds like everyone's just making fun of the comedian real funny i do like listening to fast forward on podcasts yeah get those done get them done get them done get information in fast and there's no reason to listen to somebody hesitate. No, because that would build suspense. And who needs that in this kind of world we're living in?

We do. We've got to live quickly. I need to know what's going to happen right now. Tell me. I don't need any kind of – I can't even – like I sometimes will see stand-ups that have really pregnant pauses in between jokes and I just cannot – Well, they're waiting for a laugh no they're not like the laugh they let the laughter die down and then they take a sip of water and then they like hold for a beat and it's like very impressive to me because I'm

desperate to not ever have any moment where anyone can start letting in the thought she sucks oh so if I keep dancing no one thinks, she's ugly and she sucks. Huh. And that's why you talk so much is because you don't let anyone in to have the, because when there's silence, there's thoughts. I gotcha. Yeah. That makes sense.

No. I feel like I talk too much. And was that directed at me? What? No. Okay. Are you a comedian that has pauses on stage? No, no, no.

Is there anything more vulnerable than taking a drink of water while you're doing stand-up? I literally have never once sipped from water on stage. And I go on stage sometimes for an hour and 30 minutes. And I have never once taken a sip of water

because even though I've desperately needed it, because I don't want anyone to have a moment to hate me. Oh my God. Because I don't want anyone to have a moment to hate me. Oh my God. It really is. That's insane. And if you also, when I say goodnight,

I am instantly walking off the stage. I do a thing now where I'll wave and I'll try to linger, but I am walking as I wave. I would never just stand there and take it in because that's other time for people to think.

What are they going to do? That wasn't as good as I wanted it to think what are they gonna do um that wasn't as good as i wanted it to be like are they gonna slow down on the clap or like they might see them like getting up and starting to talk amongst themselves about me like i just don't want to hear any feedback that i might not they might not like me and so i just run off stage instantly people like stand out there and bask in it i could never ever do that i'm like taylor swift i want that floor to open up and just to fall beneath it i don't even like to walk that is my dream where people are specifically buying tickets for your show they're not just like showing up to a comedy club and no i know there's on the roster oh i know it's been like this for years and i

will never lose the feeling that um i'm not good and you don't want me to lose that. I'm listening to my fans who love me so much and want me to have self-esteem. No, you don't. You don't want me to get used to it or think that I'm cool or think that I'm good because that is anti-comedy to me. For me. I think there are some comedians that can like themselves

and still be funny, but not me. I need to be desperate for your approval. Otherwise, the second I start going, I'm amazing, and I feel it shift, and I get less funny. And we've seen it with the best comedians

that have finally found this massive success. They always take a dip because their audiences just applaud everything they say. They stop trying because you don't need to try as hard when everyone likes you for no reason because you're famous. Well, you got to try to get better always. You just have to keep finding

new ways to hate yourself and be disappointed in yourself. I've never heard it like that, but I get it. I understand. It keeps you going. I mean, I guess if you're so famous, if you're like Seinfeld or something and everybody knows you, then it's hard. But like, if you just make an effort to go out and perform in front

of groups of people that aren't your fans i think that helps too that yeah that's good and i do do i do do that a lot i do sets all the time um when i'm in la and people know who i am and are excited to see me but i never but i literally never even think about my audience as like because i think about of course i think about the people that are coming to see me that are like fans of mine, but I think about the guy they brought with them who has never heard of me or the woman that I met this weekend who said, I had never heard of you before.

And now I'm a fan. Like I think about those people that kind of have to be sold on me and are kind of like, or the people that are expecting me to have like the kind of tight row set that I had at Tom Brady. I'm thinking, oh, I'm going to disappoint those people because they expect me to roast the front row and I'm not

going to do that now. I always am feeling like I'm disappointing people, but I think it's good. You could throw one roast in there just to, you could just say like, you look like a pig or whatever and then move on. Yeah, that'll be great. You're ugly.

The problem is, if I look at them, then I will see them. And I can't see their faces because if I see that they're not having fun or they're looking at their phone or something, I will take it too personally and I'll derail my set. So in order to roast them, I have to look at them. But I blur my eyes. Oh yeah, you said you can do that. And so I don't see anyone. And I hope you don't take that offensively if you're like someone who comes to my show

and they're like, I want you to see me. Like I go to Taylor Swift shows, there's no part of me that's like, she saw me. Like I've lost that kind of, that was like a hope I had when I saw Dave Matthews in high school. Now as a performer, I know you don't really,

you can't, and she does point at people and goes I love your outfit. Like she does look at people but. But she's just looking at their outfits. I'm not going to get seen by Taylor Swift. So if you're going to my show to get seen by me I'm so sorry. Just DM me. I'll like your thing. Or like post a picture of me and I'll DM you back.

Thank you. And I will totally see you then. Yeah. But that's all I can promise. Or I can meet and greet. I don't do those anymore more oh i i'm so proud of you for giving those up i see that so i i put the mandate out for no more meet and greets after the roast because i was just adding all these dates and we chris and i have been talking about like for safety measures and just for my health measure because it's just not about shaking hands it's just too much and health measure because it's just not about shaking hands it's just too much and it's just it's exhausting and and because i like to give it

my all and i actually do have fun at them but like you can't you can't keep doing things just because they're fun your ass has been grazed enough yes my ass has been slightly grazed by someone who my wife is a fan i i don't know. I like the roast you did. Tonight was a little bit different, but you did good, kid. I have had enough of that. I will miss meeting so many people.

It's so much fun to be there watching you greet your fans. It is tiring. You can't keep going to raves your whole life. You might be someone who used like go to raves or go out to parties like yeah you could argue that's fun why don't you keep doing that like because you can't like and so it's not i'm not saying meet and greets aren't fun because i think a lot of people when they go they come up and meet me at them they go i know you hate this and it's like i don't i i truly don't it's just

it's a whole other show i I have to be very charismatic. And it's genuine. There's not any part of me that's faking it. Maybe there is when a guy says something rude and I have to just be like, okay, bye, sir. But genuinely, besties who have met me, you know that I'm not faking that. I'm so excited.

I met, this weekend there was a bestie that's listened to every show. I was so excited to meet her. I met, we met there was a bestie that's listened to every show. I was so excited to meet her. I met, you know, we met, what's her name? Renee at Eras in Indie. I was so excited to meet her. Please find me in public. Did you know who she was by chance?

If she would have said I'm Renee Guitar, I would have been like, oh, of course. Because I've even commented on her name when she's been in the lives watching me play guitar. I'm like, your name's Guitar. Please don don't judge me i'm so sorry to bastardize your last name and um so i would have known but she just said renee so i didn't connect it she's the one with the guy that was in the tuxedo and that's her husband oh her husband yeah and she wrote to me laughing so much because she was like that's so funny you thought he was gay it's oh but he was dressed like a guy yeah i said it on the show that i i was unclear of if it was her husband or a gay her gay friend but he's just a great dresser the mystery is revealed it was revealed he is her

husband and she took no offense and as why but by the way why would anyone take offense to being thought that they were gay like that shouldn't be something that people go oh i'm so sorry i thought you were gay. Being gay is awesome. I'm done apologizing if I think someone's gay and they're not. That's insulting to gay people. Well, it could be insulting to him because he's like, why do I look so feminine?

Do I look feminine? But why is that a bad thing? I don't, because macho men don't like that. I know, well, that's a weakness of theirs. If they can't, feminine isn't necessarily gay. No, that's a weakness of theirs. If they can't. Feminine isn't necessarily gay. No, not at all. Straight and feminine, which is fine. Yes.

No, they were the sweetest couple ever. They attacked me. They're like, we have something for you. And they had a friendship bracelet that said, just kidding. Just kidding. So cute. I was like, what? Can we take it to your picture?

It was so cute. To get a bracelet made for you, Julie? Oh, my God. I was astounded. I was like, what? That is the cutest thing ever. But I do have meet and greets left on my shows, but those tickets are already sold. And any added shows do not have meet and greets.

So I'm still doing meet and greets until the end of December because those shows were sold before Tom Brady roast. But after the roast, I said no more so and I'll probably get to a point in my career where I'll start meeting people again where it will make more sense but it just like when you're in your 70s yeah when I'm like back yeah because it's like I will have

it won't be that many people now it's too many people it's like it's a long line and I really want to focus on the show I want to focus my energy there because when I have two shows in a night and I have a meet and greet in between, I'm pretty drained for the second show. Then that's robbing the second show of an energy that I could have brought to

them. I will say that a lot of people have been coming up being like, you're not doing these anymore for much longer. They are even aware of it. They're like, why are we getting to meet you? I go, I don't really know. I'm happy because... Well, you're getting bigger

and more famous. I'm the best meet and greet you will possibly get. If you ever got to meet and greet me, I dare you to have a better experience with a celebrity than me. I really do. Not because I'm phoning it in. I know how much it matters when I've met people.

Yeah. For them to say my name. Look me in the eye. Have a moment with me. Yeah. Like I really try to give that because I know what it feels like and I want you to feel that way because I am so grace grateful for your your fandom and your support and I want you to feel good about having done it. So they, I put a lot of work into it and I just don't want to, I don't want to sit in a chair and have people come in and not be able to talk to me and just look at the camera.

And then I could do meet and greets like that for the rest of my life. The way the Dixie chicks did when I met them in the year 2000 filed in, told not to look at them, not to talk to them, walk me up, stand behind them as they sit in director's chairs and then shuffle back out of the room without a word. Not a hi, hello?

Not a hello, like maybe a smile. Maybe there was like a hi, but I remember being like, that was dumb. Interesting. And that made me like them less. Yeah. You gotta think about that. You think all these things

are gonna make people like you more. That, I would say, I liked the Dixie Chicks less after that. It was supposed to be additive and it was not. I don't blame you, Nikki. Emmy nominated or Grammy nominated artists can say that about their dedication to their fans. I think that's a good point.

Grammy. I am nominated for a Grammy. Grammy. I can't believe it. We're so proud of you. I think it's like a joke or something. No joke. You're going to get this one too.

This one is in the bag. All right, Brian. I don't know if it's in the bag. In the bag. In the bag. There's no Dick Van Dyke's not in this one. Yeah. Joey Joel's not in this one.

It's just you versus comedians, and that's the way it should be. No, I'm nominated for Best Traditional R&B Album. Oh, I didn't realize that. It's you versus Usher? Yeah, they put me in there as a DEI hire. No, yeah, it's best comedy album. It's just funny because as a comedian, you never think you're going to win a Grammy or be nominated for a Grammy.

It's not even like in the scope of, I mean, even an Emmy, I was just like, I don't think that, it was never the end game. Or even a thing on my radar when I started doing comedy. Wow. But they say it's an album. And I mean, it all sounds... Because it is. It's an audio album. Okay. You just thought I was getting

a Grammy for my special? No, no, no. For the visual? No. For your song? No. Okay. For for the sound for the sounds yeah yeah yeah but i'm just saying that's special i mean it's really good i'm just saying an album it just sounds crazy that nobody has albums comedy album yeah well we are so when you took out that horn and you started honking that horn but it is cool that

i did have my song on i do have my song on the album so i am yeah if you win the grammy i will have won for singing yes that's right one part of it yeah yeah so it is on there it was a factor and i have to say yeah you definitely should not do meet and greets anymore as much as that hurt i mean i i don't blame you at all it's it's even like J.K. Rowling used to do book signings at midnight for the Harry Potter books when she was first starting. And people would line up around the store doing that. And then she stopped doing them around book four. Right. Everybody does it.

I stopped doing meet and greets years ago because it was just too awkward standing there with avoiding eye contact of everybody who was leaving oh i never ever when i was a middle act even when i was a headliner at a club at clubs when people were just going to the club because they won free tickets and they didn't know who it was i would never wait after the show oh and like collect, great shows, whatever it was, because I never want people to give me something they don't want to give me. And when you are faced with walking out of a show, you have to say good job. And if you don't, they really must hate you. And so that feels really bad.

So even the good jobs don't mean anything because you're kind of forcing them by lingering outside the door but some people just don't care they'll take they love it i could never i could never out there um i actually i i did a thing recently where i got off stage and had a really good showing on stage there It was no question that I did a great job. I walk off stage and like every, you just like, when you walk off stage, I would not have chosen this. I would have loved to go through the floor and not have to meet anyone because again,

I just, even when I do a great job, I don't really want people to have to say it. But I was walking off stage into an area where people kind of had to say it and I put my head down and I'm kind of like yeah and everyone's like whoo you know good job and i have to walk by this very famous person who just saw me and who i just i i said hi to very briefly before the show because i was very intimidated by oh my gosh him and um and was like i'm such a big fan and they were kind of like uh-huh like but didn, didn't really say it back. But I didn't expect them to.

I was just like, okay, I just wanted to say I'm a big fan. So that was before. And then that person, you know, two hours later is standing right. I have to walk by them. And it's like I'm walking through a gauntlet of good jobs. And so I look at the person in the face because I know they have to say it. And I'm just going to be like, oh, here we go. You say good job, too, because we just just met backstage and that's what you do stone faced me did not say anything

and i just walked by and i'm like oh not only like i would have understood if i really bombed i would have been like mad respect you didn't just lie to me but i didn't oh boy i didn't and so it was just like what it was it was just like, what? It was, it was another one of those moments. I talked about it on the podcast yesterday where you just go, I got your number.

I know who you are. I know. I don't really respect you anymore because that was so mean for no reason. Yeah. The stone facing was, was because you did so well. They felt now like they're lesser. No,

I don't think it was that. I just think it was like, I, I'm, my thing is not to give anyone anything oh yeah yeah no matter what my thing is not to be not to be nice that's my that's my whole thing is like i'm not a person who says good job to anyone so i guess great consistently that does make them elevated above the other people around them because they're not willing to give any ground. I've seen this person say good... I've seen this person lose their cool and

be a little bit nicer than they put in it. So it was just like, okay. Great. I can't wait to hear his... Yeah, I'll tell you later who he was. They've been nice to others. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And I'm a big fan of this person. Of course. Or others that are yeah oh yeah and I'm a big fan of this person of course

or you know others that are just legends in the business that might not be able to get them anything but everyone just like sucks their dicks sorry I said dicks sucks their dicks mom you know I don't talk like that

I don't talk like that I did say one time you could see his... I was... It was a very formative moment for me, but I was... Here we go. Eight or nine. Oh.

It must have been... What are you in fourth or fifth grade? Fourth grade. Eight or nine, I think. Yeah. Ten. Ten. And I was...

We were on Blaze Avenue, which was... Okay. So it had to be before sixth grade. Mm-hmm. And it was a Winter Olympics, so it was 1994. I was ten. Okay. I was nine. I know where you're going before sixth grade. And it was the Winter Olympics. So it was 1994. I was 10.

I was nine. I know where you're going. Sochi. Nagano. Atlanta. I don't think it was. I think it was Atlanta. Because it was like the Nancy Kerrigan year.

No. It was winter. So whatever that. Nagano. Okay. Was it Nagano? No, it wasn't Nagano. It was 1994.

It's the Winter Olympics.ics doesn't matter so okay they um or maybe it was whatever years around there there was an ice skater guy and i said oh my god you can see his dick because you could right and my mom her neck like her head almost snapped off because she was nicky and i'm sure there was someone over that was like a neighbor that you just were worried that they were because i probably would have gotten away with saying that if it was our close family i mean i never said that word i don't think it was the first time i'd ever used the word but i wasn't trying to be indecent i was just trying not to say penis because i knew penis was a bad word that's even but i was trying to

come up with a different word. And then another time, and you were like Nikki! And I remember being like, oh, that's a bad word. Cannot ever say dick. Ever, ever, ever. And then another time I was talking about someone in our... God, you have a memory. Well, no, I have memories of when I've been like, when people go, Nikki!

You have memories of when someone shames you about something you've done. You definitely carry childhood memories of that. Maybe. Yeah. Everyone's memories. People go, you, whenever someone, this is just a note. When someone remembers something that you don't, it's not because you have a bad memory.

Anya does this all the time. I'll say I remember something. She goes, you have the best memory. And I go, no, I remember that because it was emotionally disturbing to me in some way. You don't remember it because it wasn't. But you remember emotionally disturbing things. I kind of remember this, though, to be honest. But I've told you about it a lot. But as soon as you said it, I was like, oh, my God.

But another time I told our, we were talking about someone in your friend group, and you were complaining about him. And I said, he's such a prick. And you guys were like, you do not say that. And I go, well, such a prick. And you guys were like, you do not say that. And I go, well, you do. It just didn't make any sense to me. But I wasn't like, ooh, yeah, I'm going to keep saying that. Like, I never understood kids that, like, were bad and would, I would never cuss on purpose. Whenever I got in trouble for cussing, it was always unintentional.

That's probably why I was like, Nikki, you know. Yeah, because I was not a bad kid. I wasn't like, ooh, I learned a word that makes mommy mad. No, you never came up with words like that. I'm shocked when you... Don Johnson was just talking about Dakota Johnson, his daughter, who's a famous actress.

They were on Kimmel. He was asking her, what was she like as a kid? And he was like, you couldn't leave your phone out around her because she would pick someone in your contacts and just send them a text message of filthy things. Oh my God. I was like, I would have been so

in trouble if I would have never done something like that. There was a part of me that was like, God, I wish I was more of an interesting kid like Dakota. That's a really bad child really. But that's cool. I think that's a cool story. That's colorful. It gives you an idea of what kind of kid she was yeah i was just like picking my nose and had buck teeth and was kind

of just like what i'm just staring at things and like i'm doing this with my nose all the time because you guys smoked inside no big deal just the reason i signed a selection is my whole childhood but we don't know why she did. And then it comes out. Smoking. Give me a break. You guys didn't know. It's the 80s. No one knew.

Thank God I don't smoke anymore. Thank God. Okay, we'll be coming right back after this. Thank you. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. The Daily Show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture. You get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment, politics, sports, and more

from John and the team of correspondents and contributors. The podcast also has content you can't get anywhere else, like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines. Listen to The Daily Show, ears edition, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Yeah, you don't smoke anymore. You haven't smoked for how long?

It's been almost 13 years. That's so good. I know. Congratulations. I'm so proud of you. Yeah. Oh, you know, damage is done. No, your lungs regenerate after like 10 years.

They're like brand new lungs. I do get them checked every year. I get an x-ray done. They're no good. No, they're actually good, right? They're good. It's like shocking. Oh, so there you go. So excited. That's great. Every time I get that x-ray done they're no good no they're actually no they're good right they're good it's like shocking so excited

every time I get that x-ray I'm like so kids you don't need to quit smoking you don't need to quit until you're like 50 something or whatever it was no it's

I've actually I cross my fingers I have a friend who smokes and recently I've been really stressed on the road and I was like I just want

I want to be bad like I want to just do something bad. Could be tempting. Yeah. And I, I asked him for a cigarette and I took like two puffs and was like, this is fucking disgusting. And then I did it again a couple of weeks later and felt the same way and was like, this is fucking disgusting.

And it was so great to know that I can just like do it. I feel a little bit bad and go and walk away. Like I, I used to always think, Oh, you'll get sucked back in. Um, I don't recommend that for people who miss smoking a lot. I don't miss it. I don't think about it a lot. It's been for me 15 years,

if it's been 13 for you. So, um, so I was ready to, to just like test the waters. And it makes me think that I could probably have a glass of wine and be like, Oh, I don't need more than this,

but I don't want to test that one because I think you'd be fine. I know. probably have a glass of wine and be like, I don't need more than this, but I don't want to test that one because... I think you'd be fine. I know. I have a lot of self-control. You are amazing. Because I won't do anything that's going to fuck with my career. Yeah. And that...

You made that great decision when you made it. I was so proud of you. My health doesn't matter. My career... Your career? Only thing that I care about. Truly, if you tell me... If you want me to stop behavior,

if you want me to stop behavior and say, you will be less successful in your career if you do this, I'll stop doing that in a fucking heartbeat. But there are also things that if I would be more successful if I did it and I don't do. But I will say if something I'm doing is going to make me less, I will stop it. But nothing else will get me to stop it.

My health, or vanity will too. Health, as you get older, you realize, oh my God. I used to laugh at that when people would go, well, at least you got your health.

It's like, what? Who gives a shit about health? It's all about anything else. You don't even think about it when you're young. And you start feeling bad. And then you realize how bad it feels to feel bad. It's really bad to have bad health.

Yeah. You just gotta... Nothing else matters at all. Yeah. Brian's had struggles too with pain and stuff. Yeah. I mean... Nothing else matters.

But as a teenager, if you ever thought at this age you are that you'd struggle with pain, like, Brian, would you have thought, there's no way, who cares? You just wouldn't think that. When I was a teenager, I had IBS, and I would go to the hospital like every four months. Oh, poor thing. So I was like that. I'm sorry. You are the exception.

Oh, my God. You poor thing. So I was like that. I'm sorry. You are the exception. Oh, my God. You poor thing. That's gone now. But is it, I mean, it just goes away or you've got it under control? No, I did. I cured it with the DNRS program. Now I have no IBS at all. Oh, a DNRS program.

The DNRS program. Would you like to elaborate just a touch? Is it food, diet? It's psychosomatic. I mean, IBS is a psychosomatic disorder. It is due to stress, anxiety, and emotions. And I cured it. I went to all these doctors.

I went to all these specialists who did all these tests on me, all these genetic tests. I sent my shit, I froze it and sent it to Texas and they did tests on that. Everyone tried to give me different pills and make me do different things and nothing worked. The only thing that worked was realizing that it was my brain that was creating

the pain. Through the DNRS and other things, I was able to get rid of it completely. I can eat whatever I want with no pain so if you have ibs out there um there's no it bothers people you can cure it to being being told that their brain is causing the pain but the truth is that no matter if you break a bone your brain is what's sending the pain signal right so it's like it doesn't matter if it's um your emotions or stress causing you pain your pain's still valid we still feel sorry for you you still feel get should get all the sympathy in the world but because we don't give people with mental illness sympathy like we do people

with a cancer or a disease a physical disease and by the way a brain is a physical thing so there is a physical element to diseases it's just on a like a you know like you're if you're if you have bipolar there's something in your brain that's doing something different than other people's brain or if you're like have ocd like your brain literally there probably is a physical thing going on in your brain don't you think it's not just all well your brain controls everything in your body so your brain is physical symptoms neurons are physical it's not yeah you have to rewire the neuropathic pathways so but we need to like change the way we talk about psychosomatic things as like it's your feelings because that like makes people that

turns people off of like ever accepting it we have to just say, your brain is doing something, is causing the pain. Your brain is doing a physical thing that's causing the pain. So if you really want to focus on a physical thing that's going wrong, it's in your brain. And you've got to talk your brain out of that physical thing. And the treatment is, yeah. You've got to train it. You have to develop new pathways that are positive as opposed to negative due to your triggers and things like that. They call it like a learned brain injury. They call it retraining your brain.

Was it like overnight with you doing this DNRS stuff or was it a gradual? For the IBS, it was, I knew that it was my brain. I knew that it wasn't what I was eating. And then I saw some slideshow or something online that someone put on the slideshow. It's not your diet. It's not your diet. No matter what you're thinking, the one thing that's true is that it's not your diet. I just kept thinking that.

And then once I realized that, whenever i saw food that i was like scared was going to cause some huge reaction i would eat double and it would be really horrible for about two and a half months i would be like oh i can't have pho because that'll give me horrible stomach cramps and then i'd like well now that i thought that i'm going to eat double pho and then i would eat double pho and i'd be in horrible pain but i would just keep going and then after two months of doing that the pain just went away wait you ate double pho just to test it to test it yeah it's just like going again it's like your your brain develops a negative association with the foods that cause you symptoms and it right

and so when you eat them you're like scared you're like scared to eat them and that causes your brain to be like this is dangerous you shouldn't eat this and then it gives you horrible symptoms and it's like the more you practice but why would you double well that's it's the back book where they say if you if you have back pain instead of every time you bend down and you have that like, and you brace for it, you go, just do, do the, keep doing those motions. Don't avoid moving in ways that make your body pain because when you avoid it, you're causing the stress of, oh, if this is going to hurt. And that feeling of it's going to hurt causes the hurt because it's the, the hurt is caused from stress.

So you're, you're the stress over the pain is causing the pain. Well, you're also just practicing. It tells you to do those moves a lot. When you bend over and you go, oh, this causes back pain, you're just practicing that pathway in your brain that leads to pain. Oh, yeah. It's like learning a scale on an instrument. Right. So you're practicing your brain learning this isn't about the movement.

This isn't about the movement. This is in my head so when you do the painful thing you tell yourself this is it's not the movement that's causing this it's not the movement that's right and you can go even further and instead of saying it's not the movement that's causing this you can make a positive association right it's even stronger and you just practice that over and over again until you start acting normal and you what's the positive association? Give us one.

So like the DNRS program, you do these things called rounds where you will trigger yourself, exposure therapy to something like if it's your back, you're bending over, it's a food, you'll have a little bit of the food

and then you put yourself in a, basically it's kind of like meditation but you do these positive associations where you think about positive memories and you let yourself feel calm and positive and you put yourself in that space after exposing yourself to the thing that causes you problems and over the course of many many rounds and a lot of time and a lot of practice eventually it's a stronger pathway to go to the positive thing than to the negative thing and your brain will automatically do that without even trying without having to think about it yeah wow it's like how i've been using slay recently without having to try so emily has taught me all of these gen z terms like slay

dead oh that slaps slay is mean you're killing it yeah oh. Oh my God. That's, oh, slay. Oh, slay. Please. Like, not you wearing animal print today. Like things, phrases like that. I, so Chris and I like didn't really talk that much for about a month and a half because he was so busy on his work thing.

We would like text, like, I love you. I miss you. Like quick things. And over that month and a half, I've just hung out with emily so much that my i've started talking differently like at first i would intentionally

write to her like oh that's slay like i would like almost jokingly like oh mickey's using this and we all know like my struggle with these words but i have recently been saying slay sincerely and slaps without having to think about it it's just a part of my slaps is like that fucking cool that's that kills oh that slapped that song slaps um and it doesn't sound weird to me when i say it like in my head i'm sure to others but the other day i was talking about a uh god i guess i know oh the um open the cold open for snl um after the election and i was telling chris um oh my god the cold open fucking slayed and i could tell like right after i went right back to like millennial speak with him like hardcore because i'm like i don't want him to think like

i've changed since we've been on this kind of like. Month and a half. Look what's going on. Because I would have been, if he would have said slays to me, I'm like, who are you fucking? Like, who taught you slays? And why are you using it? Like, it's a normal thing and it's not ironic. But yeah, I think that you, I think that's like anything in life.

Like, no matter how much I think it won't work. Like, this sounds like it won't work. Like this sounds like it won't work. You know, like, oh, you have to make new. If I keep telling myself I love myself, then I won't even have to tell myself I love myself. I just will. Like that just sounds like hogwash. And it's, or I'll bend over in this way

that has hurt me for years and years. Emily has not approved of that. That phrase does not slap. That old timingy word that sucks wait by the way Emily said that the word cool is not used by Gen Z literally cool

is like unused what about awesome and she said that wait no awesome she was like no I don't think she would approve

of awesome either she also was like stop saying thanks she was like she didn't wait no awesome she was like no i don't think she'd approve of awesome either yeah she also was like stop saying thanks she was like she didn't say stop but she was like you're adorable when you write thanks with two exclamation marks like she was like you always say that and it just sounds like too she's like it just is like it's just giving i forget what she said it was giving it was just trying too hard or she goes i go then what do you do i want to be sincere and i want to let people know i'm very grateful for what they just did for me via text and she said t y in all caps a space and then a double exclamation mark oh so t that shows no effort oh to me that's t y for caps in caps yeah and then's space and then double exclamation yes space it i don't understand

the space that's that that is i cannot see a man doing that or a gay a gay man can and there's nothing wrong with that okay not that there's anything wrong with that we're getting back to seinfeld seinfeld always did everything first but um yeah i i was thinking about yeah just the you can't even imagine that you will get used to something or or when you first start working out and it hurts so much and you're like i'll never be strong enough to do this where it's there's just i don't what is it about our human brains that just have no faith in ourselves for like learning new habits i've it's happened to me but your whole life is just a bunch of habits habits that have turned into your personality.

But for some reason, when you start a new one, you just go, it won't stick. It's never going to. And it eventually does. If you keep doing it consistently. Sean O'Connor, because he has had to take flights so often to be on the road with me, he is terrified of flying. He has to have a special shirt that he brings with him. Not that he wears that he brings with him.

Okay. That's like a good luck shirt. That's like a, a thing. And he, and I'm always worried about him when he's flying out. Cause I'm like, God, you were just like on the plane.

I don't want you to be white knuckling like a five hour flight. And sometimes there's turbulence and I just want him to understand like, it's okay. But he says it's gotten so much better because he just has to do it a bunch and there's no choice you're forced and he says his anxiety is way less and i'm so happy to hear that because but it can't not be what does he do with that shirt does he cover his head with it i think it's just like has to be all like in his bag or something he just has to be with him oh do you guys have any um superstitions like I mean, I knock on wood all the time. Whenever I see something that's going to happen,

I knock on wood. Do you find wood? I find wood. It must be wood. I don't accept when someone knocks on their head and goes, oh, this is wood. And it's like, that's not wood. That's bone and hair.

I agree with you. I was on a red carpet once and said something that made me feel like I jinxed myself. So I said, oh my god i have to knock on wood and there was no wood anywhere near red carpet so i had to run off the red carpet to like go find a floorboard that was like in a bathroom off the the hall that we were in but it was because even the girl was like you gotta knock on wood and i was like oh fuck you're right like i just i can't screw myself over like that and sometimes you see things that are that are fake wood and you think

they're real wood and you knock on that you're wait a second this is just plastic this isn't real wood yeah i always worry about a varnish what if a wood has a varnish does that keep you from the wood because you're not actually knocking on the real yeah but the wood is vibrating yeah it's vibrating i was gonna say okay say. Okay, so that counts. That's okay. That's okay. Sometimes I'm in the woods and I'm like,

oh, I got to knock on wood and I look around like, there's no wood around and then I realize that trees are wood. You forget. Yeah.

So quickly we forget. Noah, do you have any superstitions? No, I don't, I mean, they don't pop up into my head.

I just feel like whatever happens, happens. There's, it's out of my control. Oh, that is such a Noah thing to say. No, that's a healthy. That's a healthy way to live. That's such a Noah bullshit thing to say.

No, it's true. The illusion that you have any control over the way that your life is going to happen. No, no, no. If you knock on wood, you will have control. Everything will be okay i do want to believe in manifestation but i'm i saw a thing about one of my favorite you know uh guys that made manifestation almost about like science that i really believed right i even bought dad his book and then then I saw a podcast and listened to a podcast

that he's like a quack. Joe Dispenza. Everybody's a fucking quack. And that he's just... Oh, Joe Dispenza. I've heard of that quack. I was really into what he was putting out

for a while. And that's... Well, why are you saying that out loud? You could be in trouble for that. But there's our... I'm saying that I heard something that said he was a quack. I'm not saying I think he's a quack. I'm saying he because but there's our i'm saying that i heard something that said he was a quack i'm not saying i think he's a quack oh i'm saying he's a question i'm

making that i'm clarifying that my mom's terrified of me being so worried canceled canceled because of a guy a guy might manifest if he can really do what he says he can do my life could be over very quickly well you were into manifestation. I know. Big time. I know. I'm still into it. Me too. When I'm on a plane and I picture it crashing, I instantly stop doing that. And then I picture myself landing and being at the baggage claim board.

And it helps me so much. Every time. If you manifest being at the baggage claim in Albany, bored. That is where you will be and that will 100% happen. And you'll go, wow, I manifested it because there's no other way to be at a baggage claim except bored. Which, by the way, when I was doing some modeling last week at a photo shoot, I asked the photographer for advice about how to model. Is that what happened? What? I have never seen more beautiful pictures.

Well, I think the photographer was really, really, really good. Oh, my God. Because I didn't bring anything to the table that was different. It was incredible. But she told me, you would never think this from a fashion photographer to give advice on how to look like a great model, a great high fashion model. Oh, my God. This is brilliant because it is exactly the note.

But you would never give this note. You would never would never think she goes bored at a bus stop oh whoa and now look at fashion models and they always look bored at a bus stop wow pissed angry that the bus is late and bored at a bus stop. I just would look bored. I was trying too much with my face before. I feel like even Cara Delevingne, I remember one time she said it's not about making faces. It's about not doing things with your face. It's about

an attitude that you exude by thinking more than doing your face. I've never seen such professional pictures. by thinking more than like doing your face. Oh. Yeah. Wow. I've never seen such professional pictures. Yeah, I did this photo shoot for this amazing fashion magazine that I don't think I can talk about yet, but it was like the highest,

it was like the most fashion-y thing I've ever done in my life. And I felt imposter syndrome was on fleek that day. And I know on fleek is not something anyone says anymore, but it was i could not believe that i was in this setting and then after the day was done emily was like girl can i send pictures to your mom because i think she would love these and i go she goes i know you don't want to see them but i feel like your mom needs to and i was like of course you

can and so she sent you a bunch of pictures from the day and she said that you guys are best friends now. Oh, God love her. I guess you don't feel the same way. God bless her soul. I mean, Emily,

she's listening for me. I love what she's, she's done for you and I love that she sent me those pictures. But friends? But friends. I don't know.

She was like, I love Julie. We like, we chat now. It's happening. Yeah. I don't know. She was like, I love Julie. We chat now. It's happening. Yeah. You know, we haven't chatted enough as far as I'm concerned. You should chat more. She loves you.

She loves you. I will. I didn't know. That's awesome. No, they're great pictures. I cannot wait till this comes out. It's going to be, I thought, well, now you're going into modeling. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. You're going to be a, Oh, I'm not kidding.

I will say, have you seen him yet? I saw one and it was really good. But modeling is a very, very hard and I would not want to do it because you have zero control. I just didn't feel control. It's like you, you can't talk. It's like my way of like being entertaining and feeling like I have any kind of power or control is talking and having words to express myself, just looks and your body and movement. That's why it's so funny that that would be a medium

I would ever do well in. And also these lip sync videos I've been doing. And then Brian saying last week, so you came up with the choreography. Like, that's so funny to me because I've never been good at my body does not, it only betrays me. Um,

but it is something that I've, uh, thrown myself into every weekend because it's really fun. I'm just trying to do fun stuff. That's cool. The photo shoot was really fun. You just blast the music you want to listen to. And then you have a bunch of people putting things on you and you're you do realize that as a model

though you are like a commodity and you're not you're just there gotcha and they treat me a little probably better than a model generally gets treated because i'm not there for the product i'm more there to for like myself you are the product and they they have to be i'm so i'm like i'm not uh but i think modeling is probably a very dehumanizing experience because you're being like pinned and poked and people are commenting on your body well no show her shoulder actually no that's not good like i don't forget that you are attached to the things that you're not a person you are a vehicle for a product you're just you're a shelf you're a hot shelf you You are. You are. Listen, those girls that are high, Gigi or whatever her name, those girls are all living

the life. Don't think they're not. Well, once you transcend the generic model and become a superstar model. Yeah, I'm talking about models for like J.Crew or Amazon or any, you know, Revolve. These girls that just have to put on thousand outfits in one day and are just standing there like, yeah, no. They're all going to be replaced.

They're going to be replaced by AI anyway. Why haven't they been already? It's insane. It would be the easiest thing to replace, but I don't think they should, but like, I just think that's definitely coming. Yeah, the tech billionaires have our best interest in mind. But then who would tech billionaires fuck? If there weren models if they weren't shipping models to yeah no that's a good point i think that that's the one thing that'll save us is if they can just fuck them then because

it's not interesting to say i'm fucking a beautiful woman it's better to say i'm fucking a model like that gives them a point of pride right like so they have to keep them working and modeling the robots will not, the AI will not replace models because men want to be able to say they fuck models. That's right. We figured it out. 100% correct. That's amazing. We cracked the code. Okay, we'll be back after this.

Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. The Daily Show podcast has everything you need daily show which means he's also back in our ears on the daily show ears edition podcast the daily show podcast has everything you need to stay on top of today's news and pop culture you get hilarious satirical takes on entertainment politics sports and more from john and the team of correspondents and contributors the podcast also has content you can't get anywhere else like extended interviews and a roundup of the weekly headlines listen to the daily show ears edition on the iheart radio app apple podcast or wherever

you get your podcasts 1994 winter olympics i've uncovered where it was it's in lily hammer which was is which is in norway lily hammer and do you remember that there was like one of the very first netflix actual scripted shows after um yeah what was the first one orange is the new black after that was lily hammer this show that starred this like one of the side characters from the sopranos who had to go into witness protection what he was playing basically the character from the sopranos but he wasn't actually the character from the sopranos that's just his range i guess he had to he was a mobster in new york who had to go into witness protection and chose to go to lily hammer

norway and he was like a fish out of water Italian New York guy in Norway going hey what's with all these reindeer and snow and everyone's like this guy's too aggressive and he's like actually I'm a nice guy. It's probably still on Netflix right? Yeah I actually think yeah no it's still on but I think maybe they they're gonna remove

it soon because it's so like old Netflix like Netflix BC you know. God it's so like old netflix like netflix bc you know god before it's so crazy how much effort and money goes into these shows that we just forget about instantly yeah especially with the binge model the binge model needs to end it has ruined if models aren't binging how do they and purging how will they stay thin okay And purging. How will they stay thin? Okay, the binge model. Here's what happens when you have the binge model.

What is that? It's the model where they drop the whole season of TV in one day instead of weekly. Oh, I see. So they allow you to binge on it. Yes. Okay. Everybody winds up watching the show and the weekend it comes out and no one talks about it ever again and there used to be a time where there'd be weeks between the episodes where people would discuss

the show and it would become a thing in culture and because of the binge model not only are we now missing that those discussions but it's also hindering our culture like there's no more like hey what's going to happen on game of thr, what's going to happen on Game of Thrones? What's going to happen on The Wire? What's going to happen on Sex and the City? It's like- I haven't watched that yet, so don't talk about it.

Exactly. I haven't gotten there yet. But then you're talking about it. No, but you end the conversation because you go, no more spoilers. I haven't finished it yet, so we're not talking about this anymore.

Well, it's a suspense thing. I like it. Yeah, but what he's saying is that suspense thing, we would all be on board. We'd all watch TV at the same time. We'd all find out what happened on the next episode. Right. Why don't they do that? Why don't they do it, Brian? What's the benefit of the binge?

Well, Netflix tried to disrupt the industry by doing the binge system because they don't have commercials. They just want subscriptions. And everyone followed suit because Netflix was so successful with with it the second thing that happened it wasn't really just like here's why i'm it was just like we're gonna try this and it was like working i guess and i guess they have enough money to make enough content to to that's the other problem it out the other problem is when you have a binge show and it gets released the show gets watched in a weekend or a week and

then it's over and then the next season of the show is not going to come out for like two years yeah yeah it used to be a show was parsed out over 10 to 15 weeks over the course of the year so while episode 4 was airing for the first time, they got a pickup and then they would start writing the next season as that season was still airing. So then by the time that season was over, they were in pre-production for the next season and then you would probably get the next season within a year.

And now that has been like, it's now you get the next season. You know, like nobody wants this. There was a bit like that obviously was a hit right away and they picked up a second season and i think they're writing it right now but it's gonna be then they have to shoot it then they have to edit it it's gonna be a while before that dumps again even though people are clamoring for a second season like that could you lose all the momentum it

wouldn't have even the season one wouldn't have even finished yet if they were just parsing it out week by week right people would be talking about it every week. It would still be in the Zeitgeist. It would still be number one on Netflix. And then the next season, people are going to forget about Nobody Wants This. And then two and a half years from now, when Nobody Wants This 2 comes out, people will be like, oh yeah, I remember that show. Like Flight Attendant.

Remember Flight Attendant? It was all anyone could talk about. And then no one watched the second season. Yeah, no. i mean uh because the momentum was gone handmaid's tale handmaid's tale season the final seasons of handmaid's tale people like that show is still on the air whereas the first three seasons everybody was but two years and that they suffered from covet but like a two-year gap is too long to expect us to remember a show that we liked and i just feel bad for people who make these things or are in them

because when I have released, when I've been on a TV show that is going over 13 weeks, you feel like you're working for that 13 weeks. You made the show. That felt like you were working. Then you're like, I'm still working. I'm still promoting this show. As soon as it airs and it's done airing,

you're like, I got to move on to the next thing so there's that the second it premieres you already have that sense of loss that you don't even get to like enjoy this like kind of rollout and i mean it's kind of like a movie i mean it just comes out and then it's it's gone i guess it's like the same kind of vibe as a movie but but a movie is a product in and of itself. It sucks for the staffs. It sucks for the... The quality of the show suffers too because if you have a hit show

with a full staff and then it gets released in a binge model and then it gets picked up, all of the writers for that show need to get other jobs in order to make money. You're much less likely

to retain your staff if you're doing a binge model than if you were releasing it week by week and getting a pickup and having a rolling cycle. Because every time you do a job, you need to go get another job immediately because it's over quickly and you don't know if it's going to get picked up and you have to move on. And then when it does get picked up, you aren't available because you had another job. So they have to find someone else to be the new people. You ever wonder why?

Like, well, season one was so amazing and then season two sucked. It's because they didn't get the same writers. Right. Because those people had to go find other jobs. Right. Yikes. Final thought.

What do you got going for the rest of the day? I might go down to our river Oh yeah, my parents' river cabin flooded Just halfway The bottom level Yeah, bottom level Which it can flood Because it's a concrete floor

It's like a basement almost Right But you got to scoop out that inch of mud Yeah And it's just a mess But we. Yeah. You got to scoop out that inch of mud. Yeah. And it's just a mess, but we're almost done. Hey, we got it done.

Yeah. We, we put eight hours in. I'm like, I'm taking track. How was your body feeling? It's fine. Really?

Yeah. I feel great. Oh my God. How's your hand? I was so mad at your father for posting that to you. I said, Nikki's going to be so upset that I'm doing physical. I'm out. I'm just like, I give up.

It's like this election has made me so, like anything that I used to be like upset about, I'm just like, it's none of my business anymore. If dad wants to tell you to go when you have an injured wife who's constantly complaining about her body aching, if you want to tell her to go on a 100-mile canoe trip with you and your friends, and she says yes,

you know what? That's up to her. You can't do anything about it. I guess that's just what's going to happen. If you have a 65-year-old woman who has to scrape mud for eight hours instead of hiring someone for 100 bucks to do it for you or whatever it would be.

Where do you find those people? Craigslist. Honestly. Honestly, it wasn't? Craigslist. Honestly. Honestly, it wasn't really that big of a deal. Two guys and a shovel, whatever the company was.

Go to Home Depot. It was great exercise. Is it? It was. Well, I knew, I had a feeling that when dad sent those to you,

we're going to be like, don't send her those. And so I purposely didn't write back anything. No, I know you did. Like, why are you doing this yourselves? I knew that. I knew that.

I will pay to have someone do this for you. I was mad at him. I was like, why are you doing that? Why would you live an extra 10 years longer because you don't do that to your body? Then do it. And then you save 150 bucks or whatever. I think save money now. Don't worry about the damage.

It's really, I did not. Listen to me. Vulnerable body. Listen, I actually really was taking care to not overdo anything. Okay. I promise you. Well, you're feeling good, so it must have worked. And that was three days ago.

Did you get your hand scan back? No, I got two days. How long does it take for them to have the fucking result of an MRI? No, I get an MRI. I'm not allowed to know what's going on yet until I get this... It's a nerve study

that I'm having done on Thursday. They do a nerve study on my hand to see if there's entrapment or whatever, which I'm sure there is. And we'll find out after that what would have caused that like inflammation no it's just like an old injury that you know and re-bombed or something it's not broken uh you wish i wish i would had an answer like that wouldn't that have been great it would have just been found out it was like when whenever they do a scan and then

they go no it's it's fine great Well, we don't see a break. And it's like, what? There's no break there? I think Brian would say do DNRS on this. He could say that, but trust me, there's something going on. Yeah. It's an injury. It's an injury that just needs to be, give me a shot.

Wait, did you get the hand brace that I sent to your home? Yeah. It didn't work? It just, you can't sleep at that thing. It's so obnoxious. Oh, my God. I'm sorry. No, but I- We tried.

You tried. Yeah. It's great. But anyway, I'll have more answers. My hand is numb when I wake up in the morning. Oh, my God. So something's going on. But anyway, I'm getting it.

I'm working on this. But I said to the girl, what if I have no feeling in my hand all day? Right. Why do I am I on hold for this nerve study? Well, because. Because you can't get in doctors. You can't get. I can't get into any doctor in town for a general.

I can't get a doctor. No, it's a joke. People go, drop your name. Oh, I do. No one has any room. There's nowhere to go yeah and then once you go it's it's i don't know what to do niki yeah it's fifteen thousand dollars fifteen thousand dollars for the year and you can see a doctor whenever you want in a moment's notice that's

what you have enough money to get concierge yeah will you send me the info on that because i don't even know what that is I don't have the info I know some people who do use it though she does? well why don't we get you that too that would be amazing I would rather give that to you than me isn't that cute

what a daughter I have I mean who wouldn't if you have that money to spend I don't know if it's $15,000 it's $15,000 I mean it costs you't know if it's $15,000. It's $15,000. It costs you to go, but it's $15,000 for your membership to the doctor.

It depends on the doctor. They don't take insurance or anything. It's all out of pocket. At least you can see someone right away. Anybody who has any problem at all like the answer to your problem is money

you just need more money and if you can't see a doctor if you just had enough money you could see it there's plenty

of doctors who are just there to take rich people's money and they totally ignore all the poor people and regular people

because they don't and they don't take insurance they don't have to and that's the answer oh and also if you are in trouble with the law if you just have enough money to hire the right lawyer a judge

will hear your case that is the same as someone else's that doesn't have that lawyer right and the lawyer says nothing different to defend you than the person next to you that is you know there for the same possession charge or whatever you got caught doing and you'll get off if you have that lawyer because they have a deal with the judge right and then the person who did the same thing as you doesn't and has to be on probation for two years i witnessed that happen to myself because i had a good lawyer that someone else got for me right out of because we got busted together right on the street smoking weed you know over a decade ago we go to court and we have

an amazing lawyer because the friend i got arrested with is was super rich and was like i'm i'm at fault here i'm gonna take care of you i'm like great we stood up to get our our you know you go to court and it's like you know everyone stands up as they read each one you know we got busted for smoking weed in the street not like any we didn't have a lot on us or anything. All we got was, for a year, you just can't have another drug charge, and then it'll be expunged from your record. No community service, nothing. Then the next person had the same charge. By the same cops.

Same judge. But the same cops, same time. Well, it doesn't matter. The cops, it was the same charge, but it was judge sentencing. Same thing. Right. And they get a year of probation and 100 hours of community service or whatever. And I go, why?

Shouldn't it be this gets this? It's ridiculous. It's just everything's about money. And so I just, that's why when I am motivated by money, it's like, duh. Why wouldn't I? And then people go, why are you? when I am like motivated by money, it's like, duh, why wouldn't I? And then people go, why are you, you shouldn't be motivated by money. You shouldn't be motivated by aesthetic things. Well, when you're hot, people throw money at you.

When you're famous, they throw money at you. So me wanting to be famous, me wanting to be hot, me wanting to be rich, it's all because I want to just not go to jail and I want healthcare. So it's not, there's nothing vapid about those pursuits at all. Me wanting to be rich. It's all because I want to just not go to jail and I want health care. Right. So it's not there's nothing vapid about those pursuits at all. Because if you look at it, that's the way this world works. And it's fucking shitty. And that's why people with money should spread the money as I try to do as much as possible. But the problem is everyone is that gets money is greedy as fuck and convinces themselves that they did something so special to be rich and other people who aren't rich are – you just didn't do as good as me because I'm special and I did better than you and I'm better than you.

And God chose me to be rich and he didn't choose you and that must be because you're a bad person when it really has nothing to do with that. Right. Yep. And those who can understand that more quickly, I don't even think it's possible for most people to understand that because it requires empathy, which is apparently gay now to have empathy. It means you're weak.

It means you are a sucker to have empathy. It's really all twisted. Really sad. I really see the messaging being like, if you have empathy, it used to be a good thing to have. And it is literally something that people look down upon people for having weird you see it are you kidding me yeah

it's everywhere yeah no i see why we're in this position that we're in right everyone needs to look out for themselves not for other people and what is looking out for other people require you to have empathy if you don't have it you don't care about other people. And so it's just, Brian, you were saying it, it's just easier dog eat dog. Just dog eat dog. That's what I'm saying. And so the sooner that you accept that

and just look out for number one and no one else, the better time you'll have on this planet. But I'm not doing that anytime soon. I love being miserable. I love being disappointed

in other people. It motivates me. It makes me to continue to work, being disappointed in myself and others. And so I'm in a great fucking position right now for my career in life. I hope this was fun for you guys to listen to. Mom, thank you so much for coming in.

Oh my God. Brian, thank you. Noah, thank you. Thank you, besties. I'll see you out on the road. NikkiGlaser.com for tour dates. So many more. So, so, so many more.

Check us out tonight on Thursday Night Football. Oh, yeah. Tonight. Oh, my God. It's tonight. Tonight. Yeah. Thursday Night Football on Amazon Prime.

Not when this is recorded before. Oh, okay. Yeah. So I'll be in Philly tonight on the field at the Eagles and Buccaneers game. Post game. Post game show on Thursday Night Football on Amazon Prime. Binge it. Bye guys. Don't be cool. Bye.

The Nikki Glaser Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeart Podcast. Created and hosted by me, Nikki Glaser. Co-hosted by Brian Frangie. Executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hans Sani, and Noah Avior. Edited and engineered by Lean and Loaf. Video production, Mark Canton.

And music by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes of the Nikki Glaser podcast on YouTube. Follow at Nikki Glaser pod and subscribe to our channel. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to the Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.