The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #506 Taylor's Back, Grammys Excitement & Some Morbid Curiosities

Episode Date: January 31, 2025

Taylor is back and you this will bring out Nikki's morbid curiosity. While Nikki and Taylor dive into their obsessions with national tragedies, Brian shares his experience at the Flight 93 National Memorial. Nikki’s noticed some changes at her local Starbucks and, naturally, had to hop on Reddit to see what’s going on. She might even have a new mission—clearing out all the extra stuff in her bathroom, and thankfully, she has Taylor there to help. In the Final Thought, Nikki talks about why she's excited for The Grammys and they also review Dave Chappelle’s SNL monologue. Subscribe to Big Money Players Diamond on Apple Podcasts to get this episode ad-free, and get exclusive bonus content: https://apple.co/nikkiglaserpodcast  . Watch this episode on our Youtube Channel: The Nikki Glaser Podcast Follow the pod on Instagram: @NikkiGlaserPod Nikki's Tour Dates: nikkiglaser.com/tour Brian’s Animations: youtube.com/@BrianFrange More Nikki: IG More Brian: IG More producer Noa: IGSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hi, I'm Arturo Castro, and I've been lucky enough to do stuff like Broad City and Narcos and Roadhouse. And now I'm starting a podcast because honestly, guys, I don't feel the space is crowded enough. Get Ready for Greatest Escapes, a new comedy podcast about the wildest true escape stories in history. Each week, I'll be sitting down with some of the most hilarious actors and writers and comedians, people like Ed Helms, Diane Guerrero, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. I love storytelling and I love you, so I can't wait. Listen and subscribe to Greatest Escapes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

We want to speak out and we want this to stop. Wow, very powerful. I'm Ellie Flynn, an investigative journalist, and this is my journey deep into the adult entertainment industry. I really wanted to be a playboy, my doll. He was like, I'll take you to the top, I'll make you a star. To expose an alleged predator and the rotten industry he works in.

It's honestly so much worse than I had anticipated. We're an army in comparison to him. From Novel, listen to The Bunny Trap on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Emi Olaya, host of the podcast, Crumbs. For years, I had to rely on other people to tell me my story. And what I heard wasn't good. You really f***ed last night. It felt like I lived most of my life in a blackout.

I was trapped in addiction. You had to grab the lamp and smashed it against the walls. And then I decided I wanted to tell my own story. Listen to Krem's on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Tickets are on sale now y'all for our 2025 iHeart Country Festival presented by Capital One happening Saturday, May 3rd at the Moody Center in Austin, Texas. Don't miss your chance to see Brooks and Don, Thomas Rhett,

Rascal Flatts, Cole Swindell, Sam Hunt, Megan Moroney, Bailey Zimmerman, Nate Smith. Tickets are on sale now at Ticketmaster.com. The Nicky Glaser St. Louis with me, Taylor McGraw. She's been on the show before.

She's hot pranks. Quick draw. Quick draw McGraw. Quick draw McGraw. She just came in hot and told me she has a book from the 70s that she got from the library I'm guessing. No, I got it. Where you get it?

I bought it, you know, on the internet. On the internet, okay. I know that seems like duh, Nikki, but Taylor doesn't like buy things on the internet. On the internet? Okay. I know that seems like duh, Nikki, but Taylor doesn't like buy things from the internet. Like she doesn't, you don't, that's not something I know of you. Although you did get me a book and we need to talk about that.

You got it? Yeah. We need, I like, thank you, by the way. I'll just say that. But we need to talk about that book. But do you have to keep in hot to guess? Oh yeah, to that. Brian, yes, we will get to that. Brian shall guess what book Taylor got me

that I think will have me on some kind of list because I own it. Oh, then I'm on so many lists. Because it's not even a book that's like, for people interested in this, it's like for people who are like- It's deep knowledge. ... like these people, I think, is what I think the book is geared towards. Even though I do, I am fascinated by it.

Is it the Mormon Bible? Kind of. No, no. You can just lie. You can just say whatever. No, I was making a joke. I mean, it's full of bullshit, just like the Mormon Bible. Oh, what?

Okay. And it was written by a crazy person. It was written by at least one crazy person, much like the Mormon Bible, who just started amending the Mormon Bible so he could have more things. So he wrote the Mormon Bible, Joseph Smith, and then he's dead. He's dead, but only for like a hundred years. So this is like a very new religion. Or not a hundred. You have the golden plates. I've got the golden plates. You ever see the Book of Mormon? Oh, I only for like 100 years. So this is like a very new religion. Or not 100. You have the golden plates.

I've got the golden plates. You ever see the Book of Mormon? Oh, I never saw Book of Mormon. Oh, it's the best musical of all time. All I know is that he wanted to fuck more women, so he just pretended to have a dream where he talked to God, or he had a vision. No, they always do that.

And then he was like, oh my God, God says that I can have multiple wives. And then people were like, great, we all get it. And he's like, no, not you guys. And then people started having, I've talked about this before, but people started having, part of the religion is that you have a relationship with God that is personal and then you have one that you share with the congregation, kind of, but everyone has an intimate relationship with God. That's part of Mormonism. But then, or it was, then Joseph Smith was like, actually, because then people

started getting their own insights from God that would make them do things. And Joseph was like, uh-uh-uh. So then he goes, actually, only I do. I'm sorry, I thought that was for everyone. I read it wrong. And then he rewrote it. And then that's when sex started going like, no, we're doing a different kind of Mormonism because he was changing it so much. And they were like, we like the old way. And that's, like you said, it's the same for every religion. Who knew that? So you wanna guess what the book is

or do you wanna hear what book Taylor had today? Well, let's start with the common hot story. That's how we started. Yeah, she came in hot with a book about colors for that are good for your skin. Color Me Beautiful. It's called Color Me Beautiful from the 70s. Or Color Analysis, I think they're calling it now,

the kids. Yeah, you might've seen it all over TikTok reels, at least if you're a woman consuming the same things I am, where they kind of like color match you to see which colors of makeup and clothing you should wear that is best for your skin and overall veins. It's based on your veins, you say? It's based on like your undertone.

Oh, that makes sense. Yeah, like your, it reflects back onto your face. It reflects back onto your face. What does that go with? I've never heard someone use undertone in a play on words before. This is the first time I've ever heard that. I'm serious.

We're making history today. But I do, I'm just like, I don't know, because she showed me all the colors and she goes, okay, this page of colors, is this what you like to wear? And I was like, I don't know. And then she was like, what about this page of colors? Is this what you like to wear? And I was like, I don't know.

And then I don't think I liked any of them. And then you were like, the one that I was like. The book's a little old. Yeah, the book's a little old. Aren't colors like those colors? I'm sorry, I know there's infinite colors, And then you were like, the one that I was like. The books a little old. Yeah, the books a little old. Aren't colors like those colors? I'm sorry, I know there's like infinite colors, but it feels like.

Since I got into this, I'm telling you no. There's so many, like you would say, like there's a purple that looks good on you and then there's a purple that looks horrible on you. Yes, yes, yes. And they're both like light purples. Like Noah, would you wear purple? Yes, I would love to wear purple.

I love purple light or like, or lavender or like a lavender. I don't look good in like a deep purple. And I was just gonna ask if there's a color that you love, but like anytime you put it on, you just, it just does not look good on you. I think yellow, I always want to look good in yellow because I see some blonde really striking in yellow and then it never to look good in yellow because I see some blondes looking really striking in yellow and then it never works for me in a similar way.

Depends, certain yellows, yeah, it just really depends on the tone. But I told Taylor that any color looks good on me when I have a spray tan, sorry. Like every color is 1000% better on me and there are no colors that look good on me when I don't have a spray tan that don't look better. Like they look fine, but they will always look better with a spray tan, are no colors that look good on me when I don't have a spray tan that don't look better. Like they look fine,

but they will always look better with a spray tan. So what's that about? We're saying it bad. I mean that's why black men always, they can wear whatever color they want. And a white guy tries to put on one of those pink shirts or whatever and they look like a loser. I mean, there's skin tones that are definitely better

than others. That's a fact. And white people are struggling in that department. Well, we should. We've had it good for a really long time. We deserve it. No, it's, yeah, it's, so I wore this color today

because Taylor went through my closet and I said, pick out, because I had a different outfit on and she was like, you should never wear that color. And I was like, fuck. Bitch. And even it's popping through on this pillow. I want to get this pillow out of the shot

because that might be, actually Marion, are you the color that doesn't look good with me? I kick her across the room. Don't wash me out. So I chose this color, but then, and I do love a light pink, but with my arm without spray tan, that's hell.

And then when I fix my face. It's giving you some color, but also it's making, it's giving you some color. But also it's gonna, this, you can't, you can't contend with the walls. And the chair and everything. But Taylor, you said this book literally changed your life or these theories literally changed your life. It changed my closet.

What do you mean by that? Well, I've been into it for a long time because my grandma used to be obsessed with it when we were young, she'd always be going up to people and the store like the Goodwill and going that's not your color But she was talking about it when I visit her so I got this book So I could have something that she liked to talk about that I could talk about too and I got rid of everything in my whole closet and I started wearing only my color and Then since then people will be like, oh you look great great today, whereas no one ever has ever, ever said that before.

And if it's my color, then people will be like, I love that shirt, but it's just a regular old shirt. Like this is a plain turtleneck. I get compliments because I'm wearing a color. You know what I mean? Like people are like, that's a funk. Like you like are peacocking because of the color. So I would just assume it was that as opposed to

I look actually good in this. But now that you have textual proof that the color you're wearing is proper, then you have confidence when you wear the color and then people see that confidence and they go, wow. Absolutely could be that. That colored me beautiful. Yeah, but a lot of it is my colors are black and white

and winters are the only ones that really should wear black and white. Yeah, so people are summer, autumn, spring, or winter, right? Yeah. And so a lot of people will say, I look really good when I'm wearing black. So I don't think that that color gives me confidence. That's true of everybody.

No, it would. When I wear black, I feel confident because I'm like, it's slimming, it just is all put together, you look at least clean, it's monochromatic, it makes me feel cooler, like it would give me a skip in my step. I look goth. I look like I could have written the book

that Taylor bought for me. It's the journals of the Columbine guys. He could have guessed that. It's literally the journals of the Columbine kids printed. And like, so the journal is on the side, on the left side. And then like the transcription of the journal is on the right side. They were fucking idiots.

Oh yeah they journaled so much. What kind of kids, the high school boy journaling? That's like big time. Big time, they were so emo dude. They were like always talking. I couldn't even read these. No, no, no, you just read Klebold's. You did not read Eric Harris's.

Oh Klebold is full of like emotions. Klebold is his first name? No, Dylan Klebold. Okay, so if you read, the reason that I got that for you, one, I know you're obsessed with calabine, but two, because when I was reading Eric Harris's, I was like, this is literally us when we were in high school. No way.

What? Stop it. It has things I hate list and like, people who walk slow, get the fuck out of my way. And like people who dress like this, that's what lists I was making when I was in high school. Yeah, but we didn't have Nazi symbols and the N-word scattered around. He had a little issue.

He was fueled by hatred and people's brains exploding, stomping on their rib cages and breaking it beneath his foot. But he was kind of funny. Both things can be true. Both absolutely can be true. You can be an idiot and you can be funny. I can separate the artist. Can you imagine Eric Harris, me calling him an artist? true. Both absolutely. You could be an idiot and I can separate the artist.

Can you imagine Eric Harris me calling him an artist? He's truly an artist. I wonder if they were inspired by the Carlin Bay because the Carlin Bay came out, I mean he did a few times in a few different specials in the early 90s, people I could do without and then it was like a list of people who say, what's up man? You know, it's like stuff like that. That's totally, this was Eric Harris's brain dropping. It also was like- It was one of the Carlin books that my dad had

that I used to read. Yes. I think it was, it was also like in the Zeitgeist because I never knew about George Carlin, but I was always making things I hate lists. I think just- Warm-up. Oh yeah, we still do that.

I still do all the time. I love making lists. And it still says People who walk slow. I can't take it. One of their journals, they were like, you might be a school shooter if. I think this guy's inspired by Jeff Fox. Yeah, everyone blamed Marilyn Manson.

No one was even talking about how the Blue Collar Comedy Tour is the reason Columbine happened. For those of you who don't know, Columbine was a failed bombing, it was not supposed to be a know, Columbine was a failed bombing. It was not supposed to be a shooting. The shooting was supposed to be the aftermath where they just picked people off that were running from the bombing.

They wanted to kill upwards of 500 people. They only killed like 12. It was kind of a failure on their part. And it was not inspired by Marilyn Manson. It was, one was a sociopath. And what do you think Dylan was? Do you think Dylan was also a sociopath? Depressive.

Yeah, he was just, he wanted to kill himself. He was just suicidal. Yeah, he just went along with. Do you know that during, there's a theory that during, I'm so sorry to make this about Columbine, but it's better than football, which we did yesterday. So, okay, so I've said this before in the podcast.

I'm sorry for people who find this stuff really gruesome, but this is kind of interesting to me, and I know it will be to you. During the shooting, there's a theory that, because everyone goes, why didn't they kill more people? Like they had the ability to. They were walking by people, they were just kind of like shooting

into the corners of the room. They were bored, yeah. They were bored. They were like kicking rocks. Yeah, they got bored by it. Eric probably got bored by it and was like, this isn't giving me the thrill of destruction and being the Timothy McVeigh kind of like robo cop

I wanted to feel like. And then he also broke his nose on the gun going back. So he was in pain. Eric did? Yeah, Eric did. And then Dylan was grossed out by it and was like, oh no, this is way worse than I thought. It was like getting sick from it.

And like, I think it's insane. And then they all just kind of, they just went in the limer and were like, oh, what are we gonna do? And they, you know what I always wanted? I know this is so fucking, oh yeah, the hugest. They weren't that cool, yeah. They were not. But they weren't yeah, the hugest. They weren't that cool, yeah. They were not.

They weren't hip. They weren't bullied, like everyone thinks they were. That was not the reasoning for it. They actually bullied people ruthlessly. But what happened to all those library books that were there and got splattered on them and stuff? You know I tried to get some Columbine shit at some point. I know, I was gonna say like what?

I don't want it in my possession, but I wanna go to a museum. I tried to get a Columbine, like a shirt that said Columbine High School. Me too! I go to the Goodwills, buy the Columbine when I'm there to check for anything. I try to look on eBay for them.

But then they go, I can't wear this. People are gonna be like, oh you're a fan. No, you wear it at home, just like I can't wear my Casey Anthony shirt. And I'm not a fan. Let me be clear before this gets pulled out of context and makes me seem like I'm into it. Just in the way that you are into watching

whatever murder documentary or law and order SVU that's fictionalized, it's the same thing. Glass houses. But it's actually not the same because it's smarter, because if it's fictionalized, you can't learn anything from it. But if it's fictionalized, you can't learn anything from it, but if it's real, then you can find out why people are doing that

so you can understand human nature. I'm not. You can't understand it. But please, don't get me confused. I'm not trying to understand it to prevent it. Like, it is pure morbid curiosity. To prevent it. But I am not saying I like it,

and I'm glad it happened and I want it to happen again. I'm just saying I'm interested in morbid stuff. I can't help it. I'm not going to couch this. Like I wanna change the world by learning what they did. There is something to that about the stuff when I'm interested in pedophiles because I do wanna like learn their ways

because I feel like me being more spreading it. Do you wanna undercover catch them by pretending to be? No, I just wanna like be able to suss them out a little bit sooner than anyone around Me and like even better than like it's a point of pride I just don't want to catch someone around my friend's kid to be like, um I'm getting some bad vibes from that guy and be a slowly becoming like an advocate for pedophile awareness through your career It's growing over time. I will say that I'm not lying when I say that is part of the reason I'm fascinated by that stuff is to

Prevent it but my column by fascination isn't to be like, I want to stop, like there's nothing I can do about those. I mean, I could probably see it coming a little bit. Like if I had a teenage son who was journaling a lot and spending hours and hours inside a closed room with his friend and they, oh, the one thing in the book that I will say that I'm interested in, not so much the journals because they're just, they're crazy ramblings of like. Oh, they're so good.

They're good, what do you mean by that? It's interesting to know what was going on in the mind of somebody that's gonna do shit like that. Oh, see, I've read all the books, so I kind of like know all, I feel like they've already excerpted the stuff that I wanted to hear about. Oh, I gotta have his journals. But what I am excited to read, and I haven't yet,

because I'm literally saving it, like I used to save books where there were pictures of blue whales. I would read the whole book, but if there was a picture of a blue whale on a certain page, I was so excited. I loved blue whales so much, because they were the biggest animal ever,

and they're so mysterious, and they're rarely photographed, and they're just like, so I would just like, I would goon out for blue whales. Gooning is where you don't come, and you just masturbate until you come. I would goon out for Blue Whale. Gooning is where you don't come and you just like masturbate until you come. I would literally goon for Blue Whales, but I'm gooning for that book because in the last chapter

is the transcript of the basement tapes, which has only been seen by select families that wanted to go that had children that died in it or Eric and Dylan's parents, of course, but that hasn't been released. How do they have a transcript of it? I don't know. They did let some people in the media see it.

And I think the media, the media transcribed it, but it's not an exact transcription, I don't think, because they just had to watch it and write it down really fast. I'm not positive about that. But I do think I'm on a list now that this book is in my possession. Well, I'm the one that, my name's on it.

With a happy birthday letter inside of it. It was so nice of you though. Because Taylor goes, did you get my present? And I go, I don't think so, maybe. And she goes, oh no, you'll know. And I did, oh I knew. Have you ever been to the United 93 Memorial? No, but anytime I'm performing in Pennsylvania,

I Google where it is to see if I can drive there. Because I feel like you would enjoy that. I 100% would. I've read all about like what happened on that plane. I have never seen the movie because I don't want to see it. I just want to read the things. Is there anyone else like that where you don't want to see things, you just want to read it?

Yeah, I don't want to see that. I'm sorry, I don't want to see the garrote or garrot with the hair of JonBenet wrapped around it. Oh, you gotta look at it to know. I don't wanna see that. I wanna hear about it, and I don't even really wanna hear about it. But, or I don't even wanna read it.

I just, but I don't wanna see things. So yeah, the U-993, I would love to go to that spot of the field in Pennsylvania where it all. I don't even know anything about it. The field is all- What, really? I know, I have to get ready. Let it roll. Get cracking. Let's roll?

Let's roll means nothing to you? No. Okay, so on the flight, United 93, any Gen Zers out there listening, I know you don't know the details of 9-11 probably, but one of the... The lore. The lore.

Is lore a lie though, or is it... No, it's fictional. Yeah, lore is fictional. Well it? No, it's fictional. Yeah, lore is fictional. Well, this is, it's slightly fictional because we don't really know what happened on that plane, but there is evidence that the people on board, that plane took off, that was already in the air

when the Trade Center was hit both times, I think at least by the first plane. And so they were calling, they were calling down because they were hijacked headed to the White House probably. And they called their family and their families were watching the news and told them what was happening. And so they all knew, oh my God, this thing,

we are a missile. This is nothing's good to go to the home of this. We just need to crash this plane and we need to take over. And I don't think their goal was to land it safely. It was just to let's not- They just were trying to not crash it in something important. I'm sure they attempted.

Yeah, I'm sure there was someone- But no one really knew how, because the pilots were dead. Because Marky Mark wasn't there. Yeah. So he claimed that if he was on a plane in 9-11, it wouldn't have happened. Nice.

Wow. So- Bold statement. But they go, and one person overheard on a phone call, it's lore that the guy was like, we're gonna, they were boiling hot water to like scald the terrorists and take over what they were doing.

And so they were in the back boiling water, they're on the phone like having telling their family. And one guy goes, let's roll. And then it was like, then they went and done and it crashed in a field in Pennsylvania and didn't kill anyone except, you know, everyone. Damn, that'd be a, but let's roll guy. I wouldn't like it.

And then that became like a, you know, catchphrase. Oh. Catchphrase for the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. Oh golly gee. Yeah, so that's why I do that stuff. But the museum is very compelling and intriguing. Wait, you've been? Oh yeah, I've been.

I go all the time. Wait, tell me. Specifically 93. I go every couple of weeks. No, you don't. Wait, have you really been? Yeah, I've been because I used to have the Unbelievable podcast and we actually recorded ourselves visiting the memorial because we used to do these in the field episodes where

we would be like, we're here at the blah, blah, blah. Literally. Well, you're not allowed to, at least at the time, you weren't allowed to go on the field because it was still an active crime scene, which it was like 15 years later, 16 years later, and it's still an active crime scene. Because they're still trying to find little artifacts

from the plane explosion in the field. It's like hard to find. It's like an archeological dig at this point basically. Whoa, okay. That's like when they found bone fragments on, they're still putting together, they're still finding survivors of 9-11. There's a lot of people that are still missing

and they've never found any evidence of their bones and they're still sifting through the rubble. And like 10 years later, they were doing some sort of like renovation job on a building a quarter mile away and on the roof they found tons of bone fragments and were able to identify victims from that. But then no one even thought like, oh, maybe it landed on some fucking crazy. So what did you experience there? What's it like? Well, it was definitely, you know, very sad. Um, and you know, you, you're very thought provoking,

but what was most interesting to me and going there were the, the people visiting the Memorial who it really truly was just like, it might as well have been like a museum of natural history exhibit where people were just like snapping pictures of everything with like flash and like, like know, like there was one woman who would like just go to every single thing and like take a picture of it. Was it an indoor museum? Yeah, there's like an indoor part where they have like, you can listen to the recordings of the final phone calls, the actual recordings.

No. Yeah. That was probably the most like heart wrenching aspect of the exhibit. I would never listen to that. Why? It's too sad. Did you cry, Brian? But you know, it was like, there wasn't the same amount

of like, when we went to the Auschwitz thing, and there was these little things that just kinda bothered me, like the guards telling you to get out right away, like that stuff, remember we talked about that? Yeah, and they were all in like a uniform that was like reminiscent of. Yeah, it was like they really wanted you to feel

what it was like to be forced onto a train car. But in the United 93 exhibit, it was just like, there were people who were treating it like they were at Disney World basically. Like they, in the gift shop, they had like United 93 like paperweights. They were selling turkey legs. Why don't they have a Columbine one

so I can get a damn shirt? No, Columbine has a great memorial, and it's somber as fuck, and everyone's really respectful. I wanna go. Oh my God, I have to take you. Yeah, come on. It's so, I hate to say good, but it's beautiful. Columbine's on one of the most beautiful properties

I've ever experienced in my life. It's surrounded by mountains and then there's a lake and there's prairie dogs everywhere, like hundreds of prairie dogs everywhere. You know my dad lived there at the time. What, really? Mm-hmm. Oh my God.

I mean Littleton, isn't that right next to there? Yeah, no, that's where it is. The town, right? Yeah, yeah. Whoa. Isn't that crazy? And also near John Bonet. Did he have any?

Maybe he was participating. Oh my God. What's he doing? He's always living next to these tragedies. He's still woken up John Bonet in Columbine. I just gave him a book about Colorado. Taylor is about to start a YouTube channel where she discusses true crime on it.

So I wanna prepare everyone for that. It is coming soon as soon as she gets her computer and her. So I want to prepare everyone for that. It is coming soon as soon as she gets her computer and her car fixed. We'll be back after that. My car fixed. I feel like your car is a part of it. Hi, I'm Arturo Castro and I've been lucky enough to do stuff like Broad City and Narcos and Roadhouse and so many commercials about back pain. And now I'm starting a podcast because honestly guys, I don't feel the space is crowded enough. Get Ready for Greatest Escapes, a new comedy podcast about the wildest true escape stories in history.

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every Wednesday on the Black Effect Podcast Network, the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you go to find your podcast. So I went to Starbucks this morning and I wanna just say that there is a new initiative that I heard about on the Starbucks subreddit that just came across my feed that they now require partners who that's what they call baristas as partners. That's creepy.

They're all partners in this venture. They own some of the Starbucks industry. Right. Yeah, yeah, I guess that's it. You're shareholders. They're part owners. It's a coop, really. Totally. And they now are, as of yesterday, I know as of today, I believe, is it the 27th?

28th. Yesterday. Well, okay, so I think maybe yesterday is when they started implementing it. I did see I did see a very animated meeting going on about the new policy and I kind of overheard some stuff but it seemed upbeat and like, oh, people have some new energy and enthusiasm around coffee. It was very dissimilar to the meeting I witnessed about when they integrated olive oil into coffee. Last year Starbucks did this, two years ago,

Starbucks did a push where they were like, I guess the owner of Starbucks, who has got the CEO anymore, went to Italy and was like, they put olive oil in their coffee. I'll do it. I will do it. It's all, you could buy olive oil at Starbucks for a while. And this was probably just started like being phased out

a couple of months ago. But there's an Olietto, I think is the Olietto is the one with the- That's it. And it was, oh my God, they were all, when I was with this, because I'm a hangout at Starbucks and was writing a lot during this time because it was ready for my special,

and people that were learning about the olive oil and they training, girl training partners, like the enthusiasm was low, the morale was down. But now everyone's jazzed again. So then I find out what's happening on the subreddit. They are now required to write a message on your cup. Oh, I saw a commercial about that. They are really getting back to the space of like,

will you look up, Noah, the new Starbucks initiatives that just started happening yesterday? It's not only writing on cups, it's to cut down on people loitering, I think, inside the Starbucks and to make it more of a place where you can go and hang out and and meet your friends and it's like getting back to the cafe experience that they got away from during COVID. What's the difference between that and loitering? Yeah. I think loitering is when you sleep and you smell bad. Or just stand around. And you are clearly homeless. Yeah, it's trying to get rid of homeless people.

I think that's what's happening. It is making people- An initiative to remove homeless people and replace them with college students and yuppies. Yeah, but they're not gonna say that. Yes. But I want it back to that too, because I want, actually, I want homeless people

to have a place to go, obviously, and I like that Starbucks, when they're just sitting there sleeping, I don't fucking mind. Yeah, big whoop-de-doo. The other day, I was there and a homeless man was sleeping and a girl was having a meeting with her superior, like her boss who was like stopping by to check in on stores

and she was meeting with him. And she saw the homeless man and she had to like, do the thing where you kind of like creep around them to see if they're sleeping. And she's like, sir, are you sleeping? Cause if we don't allow sleep, so it's like, just let him sleep. There's no difference between him laying,

like with his eyes open or not. I wanted to get him some like glass, like some better sunglasses so he can always pretend. Some sunglasses that have open eyes on them. Eyes on them, yeah. I was like, how do I help this man be able to sleep? Because God, it would suck to be homeless and never find a place to just fucking rest your eye.

The library. You know the way they handle that at the New York Public Library system. And I got to imagine most public library systems. Spikes. They put spikes on you. You can't sit down like a pigeon. That's what they do to some places.

Yeah. No, because I used to go during my lunch breaks, and when I worked in an office in New York City, I would go to the New York Public Library in Bryant Park, and I would sleep at a table, and they would not allow it. They would just, the librarians would go around with like a metal ruler and they would smack the table next to you. What? That's so disturbing.

Even if they saw you kind of like dozing off, they would smack the table. Dude, that's crazy. You'd be like studying your text. What's the difference from sleeping and being awake? Maybe you'd be like reading the Columbine journals and then you'd hear this crack over and over again throughout the echoey halls of the library.

I'm gonna do it here. That's what makes you snap. No, there's nothing I still think about. I think the worst torture I've ever felt because I'm a very lucky person, the worst mental torture I've ever felt in my life, well, it's not the worst, it's the second worst. I'll save the worst for later,

is being in class in high school and college, but mainly high school because it's less populous and you're in smaller classes and you can't stay awake and your head is bopping and you're trying to keep it up and you're embarrassing to be. And you know that if you do fall asleep, you're going to be really embarrassed when the teacher either calls you out

or you do the head bopping thing. Like you're doing the, yeah, you're bopping along to some music that no one else is listening to so it's that is that to me is like the worst torture of my life and i hate when i see people head bopping chris does it on planes and i'm always like holding his forehead against the thing i can't stand bopping heads it makes me so alarmed dreaming that they're falling and going oh like it's the worst feeling i'm trying to prevent it or the teacher is like would anyone here like to share their opinion on the ottoman empire I hear them like dreaming that they're falling and going, oh, like it's the worst feeling. I'm trying to prevent it.

Or the teacher is like, would anyone here like to share their opinion on the Ottoman Empire? And then you head back and it's like, no. I would always beg, listen up teachers right now. If you have students falling asleep in class, it's not, don't take it personally. You don't know what's going on for them at home. Don't be a bitch about it and we're a dick,

whichever one you want to be. But don't be either of them. Here is what you do. Get the students to stand up and do five jumping jacks. I would always want a teacher to do something that would require me to think or talk or get up. Just get them to stand up and stretch and get them to sit down. Like do something and don't single them out, just make it a thing for the whole class. It really is only about that. Like they need to, like when you're just sitting there still listening to a monotone voice, talking about something you're not interested in

and being forced to even be there, of course you're gonna fall asleep. I hate when teachers would get like personally offended that you were falling asleep. Also kids and teenagers need more sleep than adults do. Sorry teacher, do you ever catch students falling asleep in your class? Yeah, but it's obvious that they like came in tired.

Yeah. So I'm not gonna, I wouldn't ever do anything about it. Yeah, but just like maybe just, because I think that sometimes I would wanna learn and I would wanna wake up, but I couldn't because the setting wasn't allowing me to. So if you even just go like, I'm tired today, let's just all get up and like.

So 45 people do jumping jacks. Not jumping jacks, but let me just like get up and just like do, just shake. Seventh inning stretch. Yeah. I think it would help. It's only 50 minute class. But still.

And it's just a totally wasted class when you sleep through it. And sometimes I would be like, I wanna be awake for this. And I just couldn't because I was in a position where there's nothing else to do but fall asleep. Okay. What did you find Noah? Okay. Here's what I got. Um, so they want to enhance the in-store experience.

One of the initiatives is writing on cups. The other one is the return of the condiment bar. Oh yeah, that's back. I saw that condiments like what, like ketchup? No, sugars. Yeah, they need that. Or cream. Wait, they got rid of that? Yeah, that was going on since COVID. Because they never put enough cream ever.

It never came back after COVID. Now they're bringing it back. That was fun. You get to put in the different flavored stuff. Nope, you don't get to do that. There's no flavors. It is milks and it's no plant milks, I'm guessing. It is sugars and that is it.

And it is not, it used to be a vanilla powder, a cinnamon powder and a mocha powder. Those are not back, those were fun and they're not back. Yeah, that's fun. Why, that's much cheaper than milk. I think they, it's probably cost and also like disgusting, like a mess, because it's like sugary and going everywhere.

Yeah, I don't know. So that's back, anything else? Yeah, more ceramic mugs available for purchase. They asked you if you wanted a mug, Taylor. Yeah, they want people to stay. They're swinging mugs. I thought they were just being weird. I thought it was because they like you.

And the mug is to buy and then take home with you, but you can bring it into the Starbucks for refills. I wonder, because he, I was like, do you want it in a mug or to go? I think, I think they want you wonder because he, I was like, do you want it in a mug or to go? I think, what are you talking about? Yeah, I think they want you to. Cool. I want to stay. Okay.

At the one with the fire. They are removing. They are removing the upcharge on non-dairy milks. Right, right. That went into work. I could not believe how fast that happened. Like they announced it and it wasn't one of these rollouts where it was like, by 2028 we will remove plant.

Like every kind of environmental change thing. Yes, it takes fucking five years and by the time it's happening, it's like really late to the game anyway and everyone else is adjusted. By the time we even get close to the deadline, they have another administration just change it. And they have a whole new milk. We never get there. But they made this happen, I'm not kidding you, they stopped charging me for plant milk

the day it was announced. It was right away. And it was so impressive. I couldn't believe it. I had whiplash from it. Cause I assumed it would take at least months and months. But it was right away. PETA really fought for that.

PETA does make a difference. They were huge about advocating for that. And it's just important because you shouldn't be penalized for not wanting to eat animals. And that's what they were doing. And it's great. And now my drink that I get is 7.74. And it used to be, I was getting into the nines and tens

at airports, and it just does not ever pass eight now. Nice. Why is it 774 anyway? Because I'm getting double pumps of sugar-free vanilla, I'm getting it, and I'm getting a venti latte. You gotta pay for the pumps and stuff? Yeah, you gotta pay for the pumps, baby. 75 cents a pump.

It's so dumb. But another. I don't pump. Another initiative is they set a goal of a four minute wait time in the cafes. That's really short, but that's still not ordering in line. Even for food. I'm not doing the mobile app.

I don't know what you're doing. When people are in line at the airport, and it is truly down the terminal, probably like six gates, and that is embarrassing down the terminal, probably like six gates and it's that is embarrassing to wait in that line. You have enough time to go buy a phone, download the app on that new phone. Maybe they're old or like me. Just okay well then you have a right to be in that line because you don't have a phone. If you have an ability to get the Starbucks app, what are you, I don't understand what you're doing not getting it. If you would, if you're willing to sacrifice 25 minutes

waiting in line, why would you just not buy the app? Like what is you, because you're like no I will not give them my information. Well you're giving them 25 minutes of your time just standing in line. Does an app cost money? No! No, that's great. You said buy the app. But people just don't want to do it because they're like I don't want to just give in to the corporate. Well they also don't want to do it because they're like, I don't want to just give in to the corporate.

Well, they also don't want to have the app on their phone. They don't want tons of apps. Every single store I go to is going to have an app. Some people don't go to Starbucks often enough. I don't give a shit. I'm not saying I give a shit. No, but who cares if you have apps on your phone? Just like everyone stop being so organized.

Just litter your phone with garbage. It doesn't matter. You'll find it. Stop having to have everything have a reason and a place. You can search. I love reasons and places. I know you do, I'm actually like having an issue. This is stressing me out.

I took a picture of my countertop in my bathroom that I've been living with for now three weeks because I usually have you or a housekeeper come in and clean at some point, but three weeks I've been left to my own devices and it's fucking insane in there. In my bathroom. It's, I tidied by the way.

Not because you were coming, but because I was like. I just, you have like 10 of everything. Yeah. You gotta pick one thing and use it till it's gone and then. You mean like one lip gloss. You don't need like 18 colors of the lip gloss. Well, you would not think that if you go to the store

and you say that like you need different kinds of lip gloss and I'm getting sent lip gloss. I know you get sent so much stuff. So much lip gloss, which I love and I use once every three weeks, but yeah, I get sent a lot of stuff and I'm grateful for all of that, but I have too much stuff.

It's always been that way since you were a kid. You would have like six of the same thing and they're lost. You need a dispenser where it pops out the bottom and then you put it back in the top. That's a really good idea. Of like each thing. Well, last night I was thinking-

Like for ketchup and the- Cause I was kind of in like a spiral of like, what's wrong with you? Like literally no one in your life has a bathroom that looks like this. You can't think of one person in your life who struggles with messiness like this. No one.

I couldn't think of a single person that would have a bathroom that is literally, let me just paint a picture for you because I would never reveal the picture I took except maybe the girls chat when I'm like in a really funky mood. But I took the picture. I just thought I didn't notice anything.

No, I straightened that bitch. And you're used to it because you are already involved in my mess. Every single piece of the countertop is covered by something. And everything from a dog poop bag that doesn't have poop in it, don't think that, to an old vape pen I don't use,

to four different kinds of hair clips, to a spray tan remover mitt, to different brushes, jewelry. It's every single, and then there's, I have his and her sinks. One of the sinks is just filled with stuff in it. Because Chris doesn't use it. He has his own bathroom.

It's just a basin for me to collect old, just things. What about drawers? Don't you have drawers? They're stuffed. They're filled to the brim. Oh, we gotta poach this bastard out. And I hate purging this stuff because it's still half full

and there's product in there that someone would be like, oh my God, that's an amazing, you got that, this is $40. You're gonna throw $20 worth of product and I can't do it. You just give it to me and I'll give it to my sister or you give it to your sister. We'll just leave it out by the library or the Starbucks for anybody who wants it. All right.

I never throw anything away. No, it's all open. It's all been opened and tried. I just don't need any more fucking hyaluronic acids. Please no one send me anymore with peptides. I can't. I have one skin thing that I use now. I don't want any more.

It's just too much. It's overwhelming. This is what all the companies are doing now. There's no point having ads or hiring someone to be in an ad. You must just send all your products to influencers and hopefully they shout you out. Yeah, I get sent a lot of stuff and then I get follow ups of like, hey, did you get that purse we sent you?

And I'm like, I did. I haven't had anywhere to go to wear it. Every time I photograph myself looking nice, someone else is dressing me and I can't incorporate my own stuff. Yeah. That's a problem. I need to get a long mirror that's clean so I can do like, this is the outfit of the day.

But I need like a clean mirror. That mirror out there is good. Yeah, that's good. That's a lot. You know if they're sending you stuff on you're not asking for it, and then they follow up and they say, by the way, did you get the thing that we sent you?

But then I do ask for it because they say, do you wanna, look, we'd love to send you one of our purses. And I go, you would love this purse because who's gonna turn down a $300 purse? But then I get it and I go, this doesn't go with anything that I would ever wear ever. Right. And then I just wait and wait and they go,

when are you gonna post about it? Shout out to Hostage Tape, mouth tape, that sent me so much mouth tape. I was wondering what that was. Have you been using that? And I swear to God, they sent it to me October 5th and then October 7th happened. Are you supposed to post a picture?

Two years ago. And it's called Hostage Tape. And I was like, I'm not about to be like, check out Hostage Tape. They literally wrote to me and go, hey, you wanna post about it? And I go, I can't, and I'm really sorry that you're going through this,

that your brand is going through, picked the wrong name. But also, if you pick the name hostage, you gotta assume that there's gonna be a hostage situation at some point that is going to fuck with your marketing. You know? And they go, we didn't, no,

they go, we're not struggling at all. And I was like, well then you don't need me. I'm not posting about, I'm not taping my face and putting a picture of my face with the word hostage on October 9th, sorry, 2023. Not doing it. Yeah. But I do love mouth tape.

Gazetteers suffer, their makeup company. No, they've worked. No, they've worked. Yeah, look at me complaining about, I have too many things. But yeah, that's a thing going on in my life. Last night, oh, last night I wanna tell everyone there is a new documentary called The Fall of Diddy.

Oh, hell yeah. It's on Axe. That's what I was like, I like saved the date. I never saved the date for anything. I watched the first episode. That's out. It's fine. Let me just say it's like, it's going to get better. Not a lot of juicy nuggets. There's not a lot that I don't already. There's a big thing that I didn't already know. Like a really big thing. That's like a part of who he was coming up. Like you would never even try to guess. I'm trying to like even get you there.

He was molested. No, no, no. It's like, well, I'll just tell you, spoiler alert. The rest of it, like this is, it's not a too big of, it's not like leading to this as just part of the documentary, but I did not know. And I thought I knew everything about the Diddy stuff. Like not everything, but the big things.

Diddy first was a promoter on the scene right right out of college. He did two years at Howard University and then he started working with a label and then he started his own label but before that he was promoting somewhere in like before he started his own label. He was promoting this crazy huge hip-hop night I think in Harlem that was going to be like a showcase and it was literally at a gymnasium, and he was selling so many tickets for it and killing it promoting,

because that's what he was great at. And he sold, like oversold tickets. They were selling tickets at the door when it was already sold out. Like they were just doing, I would say, unethical things. Doing the dirty. If it's already sold out.

Dirty and out. Selling tickets at the door. And they couldn't fit any more people in the gym, if it's already sold out, if you're selling tickets at the door. And they couldn't fit any more people in the gym, and so they closed these gym doors. And there was a fucking crowd crush in 1990, I believe, in Harlem at this gymnasium. I thought I knew about all crowd crushes. I honestly researched them. You were into crowd crushes?

Yeah, my mom was at the who concert the 1977 I think who concert where a bunch of people in Cincinnati got kept crowd-crushed So I've always like it's been a part of the lore of my life hearing my mom And it's crazy you literally like I don't even want to talk about what happens to your body when you're a crush Horrible, it's the worst way to die imaginable. But guess how many, fucking eight, no nine, nine people died at this crowd crush that Diddy was the promoter for. And the first time you ever see Diddy in the spotlight

is him at a press conference as one of the promoters of and responsible for the event saying, you know, we wanna make sure this never happens again So that really and then there were a lot of people in the documentary that were like did he got my sister a ticket? And she died there and then did he? Like did I don't think I was kind of half watching it because that's the way we watch things So apparently did he didn't do what he needed to do to make that situation, right? No, take any responsibility for it. Of course

He shouldn't have been allowed to promote another show ever again after that. You kill nine people, you should be like, criminally liable. I can't believe none of us knew about this. I know about pop culture things. I did not know P. Diddy was one of the people that oversold an event that led to a crowd crush,

because, well, it was really because the doors got shut, and someone didn't open them, and then when they saw people, people were like, they're shutting the doors. We want to get inside. And just, yeah. And so nine people died in 1990 and Diddy was, I couldn't believe it. There's sometimes, it was probably just in a local newspaper. We didn't know it was huge. No, no, no. Yeah. But nine people dying. I can't believe New York City. No one sued either But still I would think you know, it's pre-internet so it doesn't percolate the same way that it would now Yeah, I guess I guess you're right, you know not to bring this into it But it was probably a racial element where it was under reported because it was nine black people most likely and it was the 90s

It still wasn't you know, no, I think you're absolutely right. It's like, oh, that just happens up there. Something happened up there in Harlem, yeah. Yeah, I just couldn't believe it. There was another one, I'm sorry to talk about tragedies on this podcast, but do you know about the Kansas City mall collapse? Oh my God, I can't think about that, it's horrible.

I had no idea about that one either. You didn't? I thought I told you recently. Just look into it, I'm't think about that. It's horrible. I had no idea about that one either. I thought it was huge. I told you recently. Just look into it. I'm not gonna get into it. It's so bad. Kansas City makes that one. It was the 80s, right?

The Indiana hockey arena explosions. No, it didn't. Stop it. Really? What? I'm serious. Really? That sounded like a Brian, you know, like,

little Brian joke. Hyperbolic, yeah. No, well, did you hear about the, you know, the Kansas City clown wig factory? Yeah. Wait, so what happened at the Indiana explosion? It was all the dyes from the clown wigs that set on fire easily and killed a bunch of... Stop. No. So there were... This was the largest disaster of, in terms of death toll in Indiana history, sports history maybe. What?

But there was a hockey arena, there was a hockey game happening. I don't know what, I don't believe there was ever an Indiana professional NHL hockey team, but there was a hockey game going on, it was a sold out arena or something, and there were these gas tanks underneath the arena that were used for heating and stuff. And one of them sparked and exploded. And people are just watching the game, and then all of a sudden through the ice,

an explosion happens, and knocks ice, and then people get blown out onto the ice and stuff, and then people are panicking and running and trying to escape, and then another tank explodes. Oh, hell no. Wait, how many people died? Something like in the 80s. I don't exactly know.

What? No. What? Yeah, like 80 people died. That's so many. I've never heard of that. Whoa, my God. That was bad.

I've never heard of that. Hundreds. Hundreds were hurt. Hundreds had like their limbs blown off. And this is like the 70s or 80s. No way. Yeah, let me look it up second at the holy shit. Oh my god. I mean, I'm not going to anything ever again I'm not kidding you when I go to events. I like when I went to my first Taylor Swift concert in

I think it was I would never that's too many people in there. Oh, it's I love big. I mean, I'm going to super Well, I can't wait if I wanted to, I would love to die with a big group of people. Like, you can't be scared of things like that. And I always just think of like, how many big arena events are happening all the time? This is, it's not gonna be this one. I also don't even wanna go to a sporting game,

so it makes it easier. They're so fun, we gotta go. Sporting game. But I do, sometimes, like, I smoked a little weed before I went into the first Taylor Swift show I went to and I think I've talked about this already. All I could think about was a plane crashing into and like I couldn't enjoy it.

Or the doors get locked and you get crunched and scrunched. No, I just like, and that's why I was like, I will never smoke weed before a big event anymore or like where I'm with a lot of people because I just think about catastrophe. And so I'm always, and I'm thinking of it like an explosion where it's like, there's no warning. At least the plane you'd be like, that's getting close.

Oh my God, that's really close. You have like some kind of like, it's sudden, but like an explode. I always think about that, like how it's just like so instantaneous and then I'm like, it could happen now, it could happen now. Wait right now. I think that about everything.

Oh God. Like even if I'm in a car, I'm like this just happened, people just crash like this. I don't wanna, why, why are we talking about all this shit? I don't know, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get up and then blah, blah, blah, blah, you can't control anything,

and you don't need to think about it because actually you want something to happen that way because it will be so fast and then you won't even know. True. It's true. I have more information about this Indiana thing. Okay. So it happened.

It was the Indiana State Fairgrounds Coliseum. It was in 1963. Okay. That's why we don't know. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you, I think I have a theory as to why we don't actually know. And it's because it took place on October 31st, 1963, Halloween, but notably 22 days before JFK was shot.

So definitely buried. No pun intended. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, that makes sense. That's like Zoolander. Came out the Friday before September 11th, I think, and it got. Oh, that's why it was no good?

That's why that movie sucked? It retroactively affected the writing. We don't realize how many things we don't know about because they happen. Oh my God. Next to something that's bigger, that steals it. Yeah. Sort of like the Golden Globes.

Yeah. Yeah. The eclipse. I had two days of, of, uh, fame. Two days of being in the focus. Fame before flame. Fame before flame, yeah. But at least I had it and I tasted it and it was sweet.

And um, and now it tastes burnt. Um, Jesus Christ. So dumb. Uh, no. Um, yeah. Ooh, actually I have a exciting thing to talk about. Oh. Hi, I'm Arturo Castro, and I've been lucky enough to do stuff like Broad City and Narcos and Roadhouse and so many commercials about back pain. And now I'm starting a podcast because honestly, guys, I don't feel the space is crowded enough.

Get Ready for Greatest Escapes, a new comedy podcast about the wildest true escape stories in history. Each week I'll be sitting down with some of the most hilarious actors and writers and comedians to tell them a buckwild tale from across history and time. People like Ed Helms, Diane Guerrero, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Zoe Chow. Titanic. Charles Manson. Alcatraz. Asada Shakur. The sketchy guy named Steve. It's giving funny true crime. I love storytelling and I love you, so I can't wait. Listen and subscribe to Greatest Escapes on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I started to live a double life when I was a teenager. Responsible and driven and wild and out of control. My head is pounding. I'm confused. I don't know why I'm in jail. It's hard to understand what hope is when you're trapped in a cycle of addiction. Addiction took me to the darkest places. I had an AK-47 pointed at my head. But one night, a new door opened and I made it into the

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Sorry, I didn't see him there. If you feel different, you drive different. Don't drive high. It's dangerous and illegal everywhere. A message from NHTSA and the Ad Council. The OGs of uncensored motherhood are back and badder than ever. I'm Erica. And I'm Mila. And we're the hosts of the Good Moms Bad Choices podcast,

brought to you by the Black Effect Podcast Network every Wednesday. Historically, men talk too much. And women have quietly listened. And all that stops here. If you like witty women, then this is your tribe. With guests like Corinne Stephens. I've never seen so many women protect predatory men. And then me too happened.

And then everybody else want to get pissed off because the white said it was OK. Problem. My oldest daughter, her first day of ninth grade, and I called to ask how it was going. She was like, oh, dad, all they were doing was talking about your thing in class. I ruined my baby's first day of ninth grade and I called to ask how I was doing. She was like, oh dad, all they was doing was talking about your thing in class.

I ruined my baby's first day of high school. And slum flower. What turns me on is when a man sends me money. Like I feel the moisture between my legs when a man sends me money. I'm like, oh my God, it's go time. You actually sent it? Listen to the Good Moms Bad Choices podcast

every Wednesday on the Black Effect podcast network, the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you go to find your podcast. So I'm nominated for a Grammy. I feel like I've talked about it on the show already. It's this weekend. It's this weekend. They're handing out my Grammy on Sunday in the afternoon and I'm flying back, I have a show in Atlantic City on Saturday and I can't get back to LA

in time for that ceremony. I mean, I could, but I would arrive looking like hell and you have to do hair and makeup. If I was a man, I could be at my ceremony, but I can't because I can't show up disgusting looking. So missing the earlier ceremony where they hand out the Guamese, instead of the Grammys. disgusting looking. So missing the earlier ceremony where they hang out hand out the Guamese, instead of the Grammys.

They hand out the comedy award in this ceremony. You can't go. I can't go, but that's okay. If I win, I win. It sucks that I won't be able to like give a speech or whatever. But the really important thing is that I get to go to the Grammys. And because I I I begged isn't it crazy that The Golden Globes it happened and is in the past and you did it Yeah, that's like wild, but that's not just a thing that no one can take that away. It happened. It's done It's in the past. You can't go back in time and remove that from the timeline People probably have this same feeling about their weddings or any big event that just seems like it's so far off, it's never going to happen.

And then it happens and you're like, oh, it was always in the foreground for me and now it's behind me. Like, I'm not even used to seeing it back there. Like, I can't really conceptualize where it is in my life now because it's over. But yes, that does boggle my mind sometimes. Final thought. So I was just excited because the, no, will you look up who's performing at the Grammys because the list is like fucking great.

And also Taylor Swift is nominated for best album, best song, best everything. So I'm so excited about, yeah, I mean, I deserve to be so. But I am a huge fan of the nominees this year and the people performing. So the reason you wanna go to the Grammys better than any other wardrobe is because there's performances You get to watch all the best potters people in the business

Sing at you in the room like you're at a really intimate setting when these people are usually arena acts that you'll never see that Close up in the small of a room you get to see and and they're trying harder than they've ever tried in their fucking lives For when they come, you know, they're not performing the same way they perform on stage in St. Louis, I'll tell you that. They are giving it their fucking all. This is, you know, a global stage. So it's just the best ticket in town. So I get a ticket, I get asked to go, they say, you can go, and I go, can I get good seats though? And they go, yeah, you'll be somewhere in the mix. And I'm like, all right, well, that's fine. As long as I go, I want to be on camera. I'd like to, you know be somewhere in the mix. And I'm like, all right, well, that's fine. I go, I wanna be on camera.

I'd like to at least have some evidence that I'm there. I know I'm sounding like greedy and like entitled. Please don't come at me for this. It's just, yes, I wanna be on camera. I'm a person that likes being on camera. So anyway, can you say who's performing, Noah? Yeah, so you have Sabrina Carpenter, Oh my God. Chad Marone.

Oh my God. Doji. Oh my God. I'm so excited about what's gonna happen. I'm so excited for Sunday. I'll be like deliriously tired from doing the road all weekend, but I'm just gonna dance my face off. I'm gonna do a Taylor Swift where like you just dance the whole time and you just enjoy being at the show without blocking people behind you.

I'm gonna be mindful, but I'm just gonna have the best time. Chappell Rhone. Who else? Benson Boone, who else? Billie Eilish. you, I'm gonna be mindful, but just gonna have the best time. Chapel Road, who else? Benson Boone, who else? Billy Eilish. Yeah, I mean. And Charlie XCX. I mean, these are all performances

I would pay to go see otherwise. Did you recognize half of those names? Not a single one. Sabrina Carpenter? No, I've heard of Charlie XCX, but I don't know what it is. Brat. What? Brat. Brat's number. Sabrina Carpenter? No, I've heard of Charlie XCX, but I don't know what it is. Brat. What?

Brat. Brat's number. Is that another person? That's what her whole life is, Brat. They're having a big concert benefit for the fires in LA at Intuit Dome. And I believe the, what's the other one? Where is the roast held?

Kia Forum. Yeah, I think at the Forum and at the Intuit Dome, there's a huge concert that has like every celebrity that's ever existed. I think it's going to be performing at this thing Yeah, get a ticket. I yeah, I hope to present at one of those No, I've I'm so excited for the Grammys. It's the best ticket in town. I got it when I got to be nominated for a Grammy every year I got to get in that building What's interesting about this Grammy nomination for best comedy album is that the two people,

so you were nominated for a Golden Globe and Emmy, a Grammy, a WGA award. A Critics' Choice Award. And a Critics' Choice. Oh, what? Yes. So what's interesting about this Grammy nomination is that the two people who defeated you in each of the previous two award shows are not nominated that the two people who defeated you in each of the previous two award shows are not nominated for the Grammy one.

So you're not facing off against Allie Wong or Dick Van Dyke. Or even Jamie Foxx is not nominated. Oh, wow. Okay, who's nominated for the Grammy again? The Grammy is The Prisoner, Jim Gaffigan. Trevor Noah, Where Was I, which is also Jim Gaffigan. I don't know why he. I don't know why he.

Armageddon, Ricky Gervais, Nikki Glaser, Someday You'll Die. And then I think probably the front runner, Dave Chappelle, the dreamer. Because Dave Chappelle I think always wins this award. Right, right. Yeah, I just am happy to be the only woman. Ooh, a bunch of men. Nominated, which is really cool.

Just being able to say that you're a nominee is really the prize. I mean, it would be the coolest one to win by far. What did your dad say? That must tickle him. He was really excited. I think that was, yeah, I think he texted, I think I texted them and I think he was just,

they were so fucking pumped. And yeah, that would be the, I definitely let my voice teacher know right away. Because just like any one musical in my life, I'm like Grammy and they're like, what, you? I know there was a lot of that. But yeah, on my way to a little EGOT. Yeah, Dave Chappelle won the last two

comedy album awards in a row, 24 and 23. So interestingly- So this is very chiefs like. Exactly, this is him going for the three P. You're the Eagles here. You're trying to- I'm the Eagles. Yeah. And then it was Louis C.K.

Although, you know, the one year that, the only two years in the 2020s that Dave Chappelle was not nominated were the ones that he didn't win. So he won, every year he was nominated, he's won. Yeah, it's not looking good. He's won one, two, three, four, five. He's won five of the last seven years.

That's crazy. And deservedly so, he's amazing. We didn't talk about his SNL. Brian, thoughts? Oh, yeah, I thought it was great. I mean, it's just when you watch Dave Chappelle now, it's beyond comedy. It's more like a sermon, and you're watching someone who,

you just wanna hear their opinion, and you wanna, it's almost like he's the president. Oh, I thought the ending was so good. Palisades, Palestine, like that was just sitting there for everyone, and I didn't see that anyone come up with those two, that thing at all. Yeah, I thought it was really fun. And I thought he was just so, it's just, you know,

I always say about him, I remember watching him one time at the Comedy Cellar and he was on stage and I was like, that man is more comfortable up there right now than I am in bed. Like it really looks that way. I was like, that is the key. That guy cannot be thrown. Because there was a couple times he didn't get the laughs he wanted to or the mic wasn't on the way he wanted. Like, there were a couple things that could have thrown his performance or made anyone else feel nervous

or feel like, you know, once you don't get a laugh you want in the beginning that you're expected to get, that can like derail the rest of the set very easily. And just with the audience because the audience loses faith in you. But he just gets you back right away. Yeah, he's just there's no one better to be in leading the charge up there. Like, Dave Chappelle walks on stage and you know everything's going to be okay. Well, that's what he's earned the right to have those moments because the audience trusts that he's going somewhere Whereas if you're just like some open mic or and you start flailing then people start to turn on you But even like an open mic or who doesn't let that stuff bother them the audience would project

Bob like there's something it's like Chappelle is just can be I don't I don't it almost transcends like what he's doing. It's like he's just, has this aura about him that puts everyone at ease. A gravitas. Yeah. He also, I don't know if he like thought about this move or if this just comes naturally to him,

but like, there's the little things, like he was sitting down for most of the monologue on the stool, and then when he started telling the story about Jimmy Carter, he stood up, almost to like show respect to Jimmy Carter He's amazing. Yeah when he did um the Mark Twain Prize for Kevin Hart it was like baffling to me that he didn't have a script in the

prompter and Chris still to this day who produced it doesn't know if he had like really memorized what he said or if it was like off the dome. And my thought is I told Chris, I think if I could guess, I think he definitely thought about what he was going to say. And it wasn't just off the dome. I don't think he works that way. I mean, he does sometimes, but not on something like of this kind of import. I think he thought about it and probably rehearsed it in his head a couple times and maybe wrote some notes and then just was trust himself at this point to do it. But what do you think? Do you think he could have just like out of his head, we've wove together a presentation

about Kevin Hart that like had a beginning, middle, and end and had a through line and like a message and all that stuff. Do you think he just can do that freestyle now? I think it's possible. I think without a doubt he was like thinking about what he was going to say. Like, I don't think there was no, no thought put into it. And he was just like pulled off the street, like, can you say a few words? And then he just pulled that out of nowhere. He probably was like walking around being like, what you say a few words? And then he just pulled that out of nowhere. He probably was like walking around being like, what can I say about Kevin? And the reason why I know that it's possible to do that

is because there was this guy, at the improv theater I used to perform at in New York called the Magnet Theater, there was this show called Kiss Punch Poem. And I don't remember this guy's name, but it was a full improv show. And then at the end of the show, a man would guy's name, but it was a full improv show. And at the end of the show, a man would go up and he would improvise a full poem based on the improv show he

just saw. And every week I would go see this guy. And the poem was every single time more amazing than any poem I could ever even imagine writing. And it incorporated all of these things from the improv show that had just happened. So we know it wasn't like pre-written. And I was in awe of watching this guy do this. So he could do it. I believe that it's possible that Dave Chappelle could also do it. Like weave all these things together and just kind of spin a yarn that ends at a poignant moment to... Was that guy old? No, he wasn't. He was like late 20s or early 30s.

But I will say the book that I'm reading, The Anatomy of a Breakthrough, I just got to the part yesterday about Andre Agassi and Lionel Messi, and it talks about how they are the best at their game because they slow down in the beginning. So Lionel Messi has never scored a goal in the first two minutes of a game in his entire life and there's been a there was one story about like where a channel played every Lionel Messi goal that's like you know two seconds long just goal after goal they played them all back to back and it lasted like over a weekend like 48 hours

of just goal goal and not one of those was ever scored in the first two minutes of the game, which he is in. And so the first two minutes of the game, he barely runs around. He's just scoping out what he's going to do and planning for it. And it's not about, they say like, you know, I watched, you know, that quarterback show and Mahomes and all the cousins, all these guys are watching tape of the players. And there's, you know, and Andre Agassi even said like, yeah, he can study someone's tennis game that he's about to play.

Or Lionel Messi said he can study, you know, these soccer players and watch tape all day. But the athletes that he's playing, the way they show up that day is going to be different than anything that he could have prepared for. And so he wants to know what they're like that day, and no one else does that. And so it's about, there's a lesson in slowing down

in the beginning to get your bearings. And Lionel Messi also is Lionel messing in his pants and he's on the toilet for like 40 minutes before every game because he's so nervous, just shitting his brains out. And the coaches used to make fun, there would be other like, you know, early on in his career people would make fun of him

and say like this guy is not going to be anything because he's just shitting himself. He has chronic diarrhea before him because he's so nervous. That's the thing that happens to your body when you get nervous. I know a lot of comics that shit a lot before they go on stage.

Right, well there's an evolutionary reasoning for it because you need to lighten your load and run away from a predator. Or you're spraying like a skunk. And 70% of serotonin is made in the gut, that's why. Oh, so what does that mean? It shakes it all up in there. So you're getting rid of stuff to get more serotonin?

It creates anxiety. So anxiety is mainly built in the gut. It makes total sense, but part of this was that they said how is he able to play? So well when he is a nervous wreck because there are so many performers that like throw up before they go on stage They have stage freight every single time and then they go out and they kill it like isn't aren't nerves Associated with like doing poorly and also talked about the guy that is the free solo guy This is a very I'll get into it later, but really fascinating research on this.

But the reason Lionel Messi is able to throw up and shit himself a ton before the game is because he takes those two minutes of the game to ease himself into it. And he doesn't just start playing. He doesn't just walk, like if I'm shitting my brains out before I go on stage, I'm so nervous. I shouldn't go out, what I'm learning from this

is I shouldn't go out and be like, right into my act, like woo, like just hop on and start performing and running around like crazy and trying to score goals because I'm still nervous I just stepped off from where I was shitting before ease into it So go out on stage from super nervous for performance, which doesn't really happen that often but if I find myself next time having a lot of anxiety beforehand like Slow down in the beginning and amp up to it and you'll be able to harness an energy that you can then be your best. Yeah and speaking to like Noah's biological or chemical reasoning I feel like if you're you know shitting your pants before and you're producing all this serotonin which

serotonin it is a motivating agent and then maybe it just takes some time a few minutes for whatever chemically happened in your shit explosion to go through your veins and then make you feel the calm and the focus that those chemicals were producing. Oh yeah. And then you get there and then you're ready. Yeah, it is wild.

I'm learning a lot from this book. It's called The Anatomy of Breakthrough and I am going to finish it and I'm gonna keep dropping little tidbits that I don't really know all the details of. So you don't get- I just downloaded the audio book, so maybe I can help with it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll listen to it this weekend. Noah's so good at taking notes and actually like paying attention and knowing exactly the data that they give. And I'm just like, I think like it's because he like was like not scared anymore because I just like, yeah, it's not good.

It's compelling. I'm excited for this. So yeah, check out that book and yeah, and start plowing through it Noah so we can catch up to each other. I'll slow down on it. I'll get back into the let them theory, which I just found out is plagiarized.

Oh yeah, most things. I'm gonna still keep going. It's like, I don't care where she got it from. I know that's wrong. I already, she already got my money. I'm not giving her any more of it, but it's. How do you think you're not gonna be caught when you do something like that?

I don't know. I do believe that the author of the let them theory, I'm not gonna get into her name or whatever. I do think that she may have like found the let them theory. She found it through her daughter who was like, mom, just let them. She like said it and she had this light bulb moment. So I think that maybe her daughter might have copied it,

like gotten it from this poem that went viral in 2023, which everyone's saying. And then her daughter said the let, didn't know that she had even gotten it from that. You know how you can see things online, you don't even know where it happens. And she goes, Mom, let them. And her mom goes, that's brilliant. And then, but then she also wrote the book with her daughter, which she claims several times in the book, but her daughter's name is not on the book,

which is so strange. So she's being called out for a couple of things. And I don't know how to feel about it. Is she a psychologist or something? I don't think so. So what, she heard her daughter say let them, she heard her daughter say let them one time, and then that gave her the authority to write an entire book?

She has glasses and she has an ability to talk. Where she pauses a lot. I don't like after everything she says. Which gives what she's saying. Do you understand? More weight. Yeah. But you're odd Carmichael, I guess. All right, we got to go. Thank you for listening to the show this week.

I'll be back from tour next week. I'll tell you about the Grammys and fingers crossed I win. If I don't, everything will be fine. I'll be okay. I love you guys. Thanks for listening, Pod. Thank you for being here, Taylor. Let's go purge some stuff from my bathroom.

Bye, Brian, bye, Noah. Don't be cuh. Bye. Don't be cuh. Hi, I'm Arturo Castro, and I've been lucky enough to do stuff like Broad City Bye bye Noah. Bye bye. Don't be cooked. Bye. Bye. Don't be care. Hi, I'm Arturo Castro and I've been lucky enough to do stuff like Broad City and Narcos and Roadhouse.

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