The Nikki Glaser Podcast - #76 Fanthrax Only

Episode Date: July 30, 2021

Having to shift away from normal format to clear out some Fanthrax, Nikki, Andrew and Noa enjoy nothing more than hearing from Besties. Make sure you also share your comments! Link to our voicemail app is available on our Instagram @nikkiglaserpod bio or send us a voice memo or email to [e-mail]. Remember 5 sentences or less... we have a short attention span ;). Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joel, the holidays are a blast, but the financial hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money Podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can ditch

your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Catch Jon Stewart back in action on The Daily Show and in your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. From his hilarious satirical takes on today's politics and entertainment to the unique voices of correspondents and contributors,

it's your perfect companion to stay on top of what's happening now. Plus, you'll get special content just for podcast listeners, like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love. That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we share our personal journeys navigating our 30s, tackling the complexities of modern relationships,

and engage in thought-provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. From groundbreaking interviews with diverse guests to relatable stories that'll resonate with your experiences, Decisions Decisions is gonna be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get ready to reshape your understanding of relationships and embrace the freedom

of authentic connections. Tune in and join the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Emi Olea, host of the podcast Crumbs. For years, I had to rely on other people to tell me my story and what i heard wasn't good you really last night it felt like i lived most of my life in a blackout i was trapped in addiction you had to grab the lamp and smashed it against the walls and then i decided i wanted to tell my own story. Listen to Crumbs on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

How serious is youth vaping? Irreversible Lung Damage Serious, 1 in 10 Kids Vape Serious, which warrants a serious conversation from a serious parental figure like yourself. Not the seriously know-it-all sports dad or the seriously smart podcaster. It requires a serious conversation that is best had by you.

No, seriously. The best person to talk to your child about vaping is you. To start the conversation, visit TalkAboutVaping.org. Brought to you by the American Lung Association and the Ad Council. The Nikki Glaser Podcast. The Nikki Glaser Podcast. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Nikki Glaser Podcast. Here's Nikki and Andrew. Hello.

Yeah, Andrew's here today, you guys. It's a special version of the show. Welcome to a special Fanthrax version of the show. That means that we have too much feedback from you guys, and we don't get to it all every Thursday, which is our normal Fanthrax segment. So all we're doing today, me and Andrew, and Noah, are going to sift through your voice memos,

your DMs, your emails, anything you've sent to the show, and we are going to laugh at it, laugh with you, laugh at you, and respond, maybe give advice. It's just a special episode that is going to laugh at it, laugh with you, laugh at you, and respond, maybe give advice. It's just a special episode that is going to cover our butts if one day we get sick or can't do the show. Andrew's very uncomfortable right now because I have – last night I did do surgery on myself, and I finally – I'm kind of sad almost because whatever this thing is on my knee, I've definitely dug it out and i went to places last night that i didn't think i could go in terms of pain tolerance and i loved it it's a lot folks

and i took off my band-aid because it's so much worse literally bleeding it's like an open wound it's already scabbed the scab has happened it's scabbing there's no fresh blood you don't understand it looks like like a crime scene on her knee and she it's her own thing i get it but you know it's making me a little queasy there's no there's no apologizing you have to do this should make you queasy this is weird and i and it it started we just did a podcast and it was bubbling up during that like i took off the band-aid and it like opened up and started bleeding and it was making like puddles of blood of blood, but I couldn't be the guest on, so I couldn't go get a Band-Aid.

So then actually I saw it scab, and now it's building scabs, and it stopped bleeding, and I'm just fascinated by it. And if you do want anything removed surgically from you, sign over your life to me, and I will gladly do it, because I'm pretty good at it.

Unless you cut the corn off my girlfriend's toes. Yeah, I did tell them about that. So I think, yeah. But that doesn't require blood i mean i really what you did usually need a local anesthetic and all the videos i've watched of someone having a wart like this removed this is not like a bad word it's just like a weird growth um people no doctor would ever do what i did last night with my scalpel my medical grade scalpel without anesthetic and i did it and i honestly could have taken more i think i would

have been okay in your mouth civil war i was i was truly thinking last night if i ever got my arm caught under a boulder i could cut it off i really could because i let me just say that i was i usually just remove the top layer if you want to treat your wart you just scrape off the callus and then you put on whatever medicine and then you put a cover over it that's generally the best way to treat it uh apple cider vinegar is i think the best method that i've seen on um the warts subreddit but this but the other way in and dermatologists in the states can't even do it because it's surgery is they cut the word out that's really the best technique and there's videos of it in europe and canada like where they can do it all over youtube so i've literally learned how to do it and what it takes

is like you have to you have to go past it because the a wart this is not interesting but the wart only lives on the first layer of your skin it does never goes deeper it does tap into your blood supply so you're gonna get crazy bleeding but that's not it's not like it's never gonna end unless you're a you know one of those the amelophiliac or whatever it is um i just made up a word but there's some word of people that don't stop bleeding and i i just don't feel like coming up with it and um but last night i was just there was this wordy tissue that i could feel because i've listened to so i've watched so many videos of them scraping using a little ice cream scoop curette to scrape out what appears

to be like oh you got the ward out why are you scraping it still because if any cell of warty tissue remains it will regrow and last night i was like let's see if i can like this thing that's been on my knee for over a decade you pick at it a lot i pick it it's like and it's something that brings me a lot of i don't know if anyone out there is a picker but when i get anxious i like the fact that i am able to pick at it like i'll miss this thing if it's gone but i honestly wanted to see if i could do what everyone on the subreddit warts is trying to do there's people there that are creeping on word videos because they're like me and they just like it and then they're also most people are there just like here's my words like i don't know what to do with it and then there's creeps like me commenting like will you take a video of it like there's always so it's people

that are getting help for their warts and people and also people like just loving it and they all get along it's weird like they'll the wart people will be like because they keep coming back and they'll be like this this is today what it is what should i do people give advice then they and then we go film it and then they they sometimes do and then they bring a video and they're like i don't know why anyone wants to see this but here you go and we go thank you so much you're like a foot fetish yeah it's honestly i've offered people to pay people to make these videos because they are so soothing to my soul anyway last night there was this tissue that i couldn't it was a different consistency than the regular healthy skin.

Noah's getting ready to write on our board that says, let's move on from warts to actual male. Yeah, I know what you're doing. You're writing a little... That really means 10 minutes. Noah knows that five means 10 because I don't listen. And three means five. Noah was about to write, this isn't wart-thrax. Yeah. Well, that sounds like a great band

name. Hell yeah, dude. That sounds like a is at Warthrax. Yeah. Well, that sounds like a great band name. Hell yeah, dude. That sounds like a cover band, Anthrax cover band. Anyway, last night I really did a great job and I went to places. I challenged myself to perform surgery on myself thinking I was almost like a doctor in Pilgrim Times or whatever. And I was like, wow, I could have been maybe a surgeon in those times if you didn, uh, pilgrim times or whatever.

And I was like, wow, I could have been maybe a surgeon in those times if you didn't have to go to school for it. Like, and I would just be a good patient because the thing is most people couldn't take this pain and I wish they could because we could get it. I could get it out right away.

And, but most people can't stand pain and I get it, but I'm, I have a high tolerance and I'm not bragging. Can you get Novocaine shots for yourself? I'm not, I'm not being like kidding. No,

I wouldn't. I'm sure there's something I could buy that would numb even ice. I think girls, when they pierce their ears, they use ice to numb it. There's things you could give people that would diminish the pain. I love in every movie, they drink a shot of whiskey. That's true, though. They drink whiskey. They bite a spoon.

Because whiskey makes you stupider, so it makes you braver. But you'll bleed more if you're drunk for some reason. Yeah, it's thinned your blood for sure. All right, let's get to... I'm sorry to make you uncomfortable with this, though, because I know it is uncomfortable. It's just, it's a lot. It looks like an open surgery.

Like you got a knee replacement. Yeah, I could definitely get an infection very easily, but I know myself and I don't get infections often, so I'm just going to wing it. I think, though, the only thing is, like, when you pick at your knee, like, it's almost involuntary at this point. And I think when we go to video, you're not going to even realize you do it.

Just like I don't realize when I bite my nails. And people see it. And they get very... People get so fucking anal about if you're doing something that's making them uncomfortable. So if you're playing with your knee or fidgeting... I'm a woman on the internet so i know yeah i know that's your first uh rodeo of being picked apart about everything you do like the thing on your knee but i'm when i signed on to do video for this first i wanted a desk to cover my legs so i didn't have to be judged for my outfit then i wanted then

i would go maybe i'll wear sunglasses like jenny mccarthy because i don't want to do my makeup i have now surrendered to i'm going to look like I look that day I'll try to look a little nice just so it looks visually cool like when I try to put on makeup or want a ring light it's not because I want people to want to fuck me it's because it's more pleasing to the eye people always go my sister goes I don't need a ring light I'm teaching zoo I'm teaching high school kids and I go they're more likely to look at the screen if it's a visually well lit thing it's not because i want you to want to look fuckable for your students it's because it looks better makeup makes you look not only more fuckable but just more pleasing aesthetically to the eye so um i'm ready to have those things however i've been on a lot of tv shows where i've

seen that already in myself to tell the truth there's so much thing where you don't think you're on you forget you're on camera it's almost like a reality show when i've done reality i've forgotten i was on camera and had that happen where i was like oh my god there's camera right there and you like it happened to me yesterday in our meeting when i was playing with my penis in my shorts and i didn't realize oh my god i was i heard that happened i'm sorry about that, Noah. I saw it. Thank goodness that we're friends. But it was, I heard that happening. I just forgot. I catch you playing with your penis so often.

Like a three-year-old boy. But in my pants. Yeah, in your pants. But still, it's not right. I would assume everyone thinks that. But like, yeah. But you stick your hand in your pants. It's not outside your pants either. No, no.

It's in your pants. Yeah, they're inside there. That's how comfortable you are around us. And and yeah you forgot you were on zoom for a second and that's fine um but anyways yes but yes what were we saying you do involuntary things when you don't even realize it why were you telling me that like you got to work on your picking thing i'm not i'm not coming at you like that i'm just saying that if you're picking a lot, I think it's going to – But you know what? My bestie is people watching.

First of all, I don't read YouTube comments, so I would never literally know if someone was calling me out for that. That's why I really do rely on the people who work for me to let me know like, hey, people don't seem to be liking this thing that you do because I'll never – The only other thing – If I read a critical DM, I stop reading it. So like Noah and Andrew, as much as you guys see if anyone's like

we don't like this about the podcast steer me in those directions without explicitly telling me that people hate me okay but I'm not getting

no the eating thing they get mad about oh yeah I've done that one or two times I know but that's what I'm saying like people

it's not I'm not I don't give a fuck what you do that's another thing it's like I don't care if you eat your pics I don't care yeah I just can't i'd really try to do i would

be eating a lot on a lot more um so i'm just telling those people i'm doing my best and that doesn't bother me and the picking thing or saying like too much i'm working on all those things these are things i'm aware of um and the picking thing but i have been on tell to tell the truth and sometimes i the last time i was on i made sure i go nikki remember that the camera was on you so many times when your face just fell and was like natural it's like the joke i made on conan oh i see about your zoom when you're at the zoom meeting you're like fake and you're like bye guys thanks so much and then it goes leave meeting and your face falls to its natural state and i just try to remember like remember where you are not don't be fake,

but remember to be like, you're happy. Like don't get lost in your thoughts. Be self-awareness. So we'll have that during the video. I'm excited to get to it. 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities.

I'm Joel. Ooh, and I am Matt. And we're the hosts of How To Money. We want to be with you every step of the way in your financial journey this year, offering the information and insights you need to thrive financially. Yeah, whether you find yourself up to your eyeballs in student loan debt, or you've got a sky-high credit card balance because you went a little overboard with the holiday spending,

or maybe you're looking to optimize your retirement accounts so you can retire early, well, How To Money will help you to change your relationship with money so you can stress less and grow your net worth. That's right. How to Money comes out three times a week, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for money advice without the judgment and jargon. Listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics, entertainment, sports, and more.

Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, Minnie Questions. Over the years, we have had some incredible guests. People like Courtney Cox, star of the infinitely beloved sitcom Friends, EGOT winner Viola Davis, and former Prime Minister of the UK, Tony Blair. And now, Mini Questions is returning for another season.

We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Each episode is a new person's story with new lessons, new memories, and new connections to show us how we're both similar and unique. Listen to Mini Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Good people. What's up? It's Questo.

Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with guests you definitely don't want to miss. Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody. Every type of musical ever. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements, some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers, but we also love speaking to the folks who are making it happen behind the scenes and they paved the way for those that followed. You know, keystones to the culture.

This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations, like I'm Pete Peel chatting up with hitmaker Sam Holland, Sugar Steve chatting with the legend Nick Lowe, and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow, Sonata Matreya, Kathleen Hanna, and The RZA. These are conversations you won't hear anywhere else, so make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, alright? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Tomer Cohen, LinkedIn's Chief Product Officer.

If you're just as curious as I am about the way things are built, the insights behind what it takes to create a world-renowned product, then tune in to my podcast, Building One. There's so much to learn, like how Patagonia innovates with its supply chain. We had to go out to farmers and convince them it was really damn hard. Or the way Adobe thinks about the first interaction somebody has with Photoshop. I was always so fascinated by how people navigate and find their way. Ever wanted to know how Nike builds emotion into the Jordan brand? You have to be obsessed with

the current state of the human condition. And it doesn't stop there. What about how Gleam reinvented knowledge search with AI? You can learn about how a Michelin star chef is redesigning seeds for flavor and how Pixar is nurturing a a creative culture listen to building one on the iheart radio app apple or wherever you get your podcasts let's get to fanthrax the whole episode is fanthrax starting now Starting now. Thank you guys so much for all of your feedback on the show. Let's get to it. Noah, what's up first? Okay, let's start with an email that we got.

Hi, Nikki and Andrew. I think I just became a bestie. To be honest, I was struggling sometimes to get through the podcast, especially when you and Andrew would be working your shit out on air. It was like listening to a bickering couple, which can be grating for sure. I'm such a big fan of you both though, that I would just take a break and then check back in to see how things were

evolving. It was touch and go. LOL. I just finished listening to the SS DJ episode, soul sucking day job. And after walking away a couple of times from it, I just, I decided to just finish it. And Nikki, you basically addressed every single thing

at the end of that podcast I was having a hard time with. Not only did I feel completely seen, I too have ADHD and can totally relate, probably why I was having a hard time listening to it. But your self-awareness and vulnerability came through in such a way that I committed to listening, annoyed or not, from here on out. Thank you so much for talking about all the things nobody else will you are helping so many people by putting yourself out or like that out there like that jackpot from brandy brandy

oh my god talk about feeling seen girl that's why it did that I'm so glad because I just, I'm never going to be a perfect performer and give all my fans exactly the version of myself that they want of me or be the thing that they tuned in for in the first place. I just can't and I'm going to have flaws and that's why I just love the listeners of the show so much because you know what, guys? I don't even mind.

Brandy, I want you to never just rough it out like if I'm talking about something that's annoying you or you're bored can I ask can I as my bestie will you just turn it off and like honor yourself in those moments of like this is uncomfortable I don't like it like just do what feels good so if I put you in a position where you're like not feeling good do what Brandy said and just like turn it off and come back again and be like i'm kind of mad at my friend nikki like i didn't like that i just she just kind of disappointed me you're allowed to be mad at me you're allowed to be disappointed in me um i i think it would be for you to be blindly on board with anything i do is not something i ask of my fans and sometimes

when and i'm not saying i'm not comparing besties to swifties but I kind of am because I do think that this was all born of the fact that I feel so taken care of as a swifty and I want my fans to feel that way too um and just like seen and all those things but sometimes Taylor will do something that I don't love and I have, I struggle with it and I like get like mad. Like you are departing from the version of you that I have on a pedestal. That is the version of you that you've only given me. I don't really know you. And I'll get like hurt.

And, and then sometimes I'll try to ignore it because I'm like, I just, you know, the way we do in relationships of someone we love, they say something and we go, I can't be with someone who talks like that. And then you just decide to forget it even happened because it's too hard to realize that you're, you know, giving into this thing that you wouldn't stand for, but because it's Taylor Swift, I'll let it slide. So what I do is I, um, try to process it and I try to see it from their perspective. And I love that you were able to, maybe in the, the part, Brandy, that you would turn off. You won't have to actually stick out because you'll remember I have ADHD and then I have self-esteem issues and I smoke too much pot.

And I am on ADD meds that make me talk too much sometimes, but they also make me not want to kill myself. So it's better for myself to just be a little chatty, selfish bitch sometimes. And I can be a jealous person. I can be really petty. And it all stems from like not feeling enough. And so if you can extend that to me. And I play golf too much.

And you play golf too much. And it's like. That's it though. No, I. That's my only fault. That's my only fault. That's your only fault. Like, we're just. I really.

Yeah, we're human. I like that they see us as humans. Well, I think sometimes though, like, like if they come to us as a place of like laughter and silliness. And reprieve. And then we're like, we're just bringing more stress. No, I knew. To them.

When we did our fight episodes and we couldn't get out of it. Because guys, besties have been in fights where they can't get out of it. Where you just go, I can't move on to the news with my husband right now. Or whatever that version of. And we can't talk about it off air sometimes. But I do think a lot of people get positive out of showing that we're human. A daily show is going to have moments of disappointing you and being not good

or not the best because in order to have the best, you have to have low points. And I think that's something that I love about our show. And I've only felt comfortable being this vulnerable and this,

you know, like I've said, when we have an argument, I don't want to move on to the news like nothing happened because even though that awkwardness is real and maybe pointing out that it's awkward now is real. And it's the only way to get past it because we can't,

we don't have enough time to work it out. I'll at least address that. But I just feel like sometimes I need to finish an argument with you or get my feelings out because, um, it's the most honest thing to do, even though I know the show is suffering. And I hope that you understand that I'm,

I don't always put besties first and their interests sometimes in those moments that I get caught up in my own ego. And I, I want to remember though, that the show is for you and, but it is for us too. But for me, the best show I can make is one that everyone benefits from.

But I will say that the Taylor Swift thing what it was able for me something that she did that I was really like hurt by personally and that I felt like betrayed or whatever by this person that literally I'm probably in love with um she uh was she heard a joke on a Netflix show called Georgie and Frankie or not. No, it was like, anyway, there was a joke on a show on Netflix that everyone was watching at a time

between a mother and a daughter. And the mother said, you go through guys like Taylor Swift faster than Taylor Swift. And Taylor sent out a tweet that was like, come on Netflix. You can do better than this. Really? Like you're going to,

I don't know. I don't know exact wording, but she was annoyed by this joke. And to me, as a comedian who writes jokes, I was like, Taylor, you're famous. You open yourself up to that. And it's such an innocuous joke. Why the big deal about them saying you date a lot of people?

You've been in a relationship for four or five years now. That's the old version of you. That's a shitty joke. You know it is. Let it slide. Because i think it probably like you said whatever they're gonna listen to zach sherwin thing how you were like insecure about not feeling dirty she's probably has those same feelings of like yeah i do write a lot of songs about a lot of guys but that doesn't necessarily mean i've been through a ton of guys i'm sure she's so insecure about stuff like that no and i yeah and she's had responses to different

jokes like she i think one time amy poehler and tina fey made jokes about her in this similar fashion probably much more like comedically executed yeah at the golden globes or something and she wrote well there's a special place in hell i think she said for people like that and i kind of loved i mean i hated it at the time because i was like i'm going to taylor so things i'm going to help because i would have made that joke um but she was just she was just talking and that's just a thing people it's a turn of phrase she didn't actually didn't say first of all i forgive anyone who uh i overreact to things sometimes all the time so the overreaction was what i was mad about i was like it's such an innocuous joke. Why'd she get so upset?

And then I go, I think I know. Not only is it just this tired joke, she is so fucking tired of hearing, and she's been in a relationship for five years. Why is this even still coming up? And it's also bad for young girls to think that dating a lot and like having experiences is like a bad,

a shameful thing, which it's not. So she's, she's mad about all of that. The example, this joke is setting for young girls, the attack on her that isn't even representative of her anymore or never really was. But then I realized, I bet Taylor Swift

had just released these two albums, was doing a lot of press, getting so much attention, a lot of people's opinions about her everywhere. And she was having, maybe she was having a day where it was just like someone sent her something she didn't even want to see and it was just like fuck they're saying this about me or i look bad in this picture or whatever it is feeling bad about herself because of something or just having a day of too much attention she goes you know what i'm gonna do i'm gonna watch netflix yeah i'm gonna check out of my own life and forget that

i'm a superstar for a second that everyone has an opinion about and i'm going to live in a world where taylor swift doesn't even exist where i'm not going everyone has an opinion about and I'm going to live in a world where Taylor Swift doesn't even exist where I'm not going to be ridiculed where I'm not going to be judged and she's invested in this show. She's three episodes in. It's a woman's show. It's written by women.

She's just a normal girl and then out of nowhere sucker punched by this dumb joke that snaps her back into it and makes her realize that nowhere is truly safe for her. Only old literature before she existed existed old shows that she is constantly going to have to live her life worried that she's going to be with someone she cares about and they're going to have to like

defend her or she's going to have to defend herself and i got it i got it all made sense so taylor had every right to send that that tweet because it was what she was feeling in that moment and we can't pretend to understand someone's circumstance when they act in a way that we don't agree with so you don't know what happened to me the morning before i start doing my podcast maybe i'll tell you most likely i'll tell you but sometimes i don't even know it's subconscious so thank you for um thank you for that that that amazing amazing uh letter brandy i appreciate you let's what next next up oh it's a voice yes from emily she needs your help hey noah nikki and andrew this is emily from minneapolis

and i love the podcast i've been listening since you up up. Nikki and Andrew, and I guess Noah too, were, you know, keeping me company during the pandemic. Nikki, you were basically like my best friend in the pandemic. But anyways, so I am going through a breakup and I relate a lot to a lot of the breakup moments that you described Nikki and I'm breaking up with like the one and I never listened to Taylor Swift before but now I do and it's because it's the only thing that truly matches this breakup and music is great and I think I'm good on that but like if you have any advice or recommendations for just like being strong and like trying to be a bad bitch and not cry every day about this stupid breakup and about still wanting to be together with this guy you know but

anyways any advice would help from either one of you um i hope that you're having a wonderful weekend and thank you so much jackpot i love you so much what was her name again emily emily oh my god i hear the heartbreak in your voice and it's like it breaks my heart and i wish i could just like pull you out of it and in like i'm just i'm just wracking my brain right now trying to get something that will put together that will help you but here's my advice first of all great job on taylor swift please dm me and let's exchange the songs that are that get us through the most and I can turn you on to some new ones because she has a huge catalog um and I want to

also say check out This American's Life This American Life there's an episode called uh The Breakup and it's exactly this it's someone writing into This American Life saying I'm going through a breakup I really need like to just some support and it's just a great episode for that. Also the, the, I saw it last night, the episode of song exploder on Netflix, do a leapers episode. She writes a song.

She talks about her experience writing a song and she was getting out of relationships that she thought was the one. And she wrote a song about when she meets the next guy and how she never thought she, like she wrote a song from the perspective of a woman falling in love with a guy with someone after going through a breakup where you thought it was the one like the next person that you don't even she didn't even know existed and guess what he did like she she ended up writing a song about a mystery person and going and and putting manifesting it she was like i

wanted to do a manifestation song you know she was like just like i didn't even know if i was able to like find someone else but i wanted to just come from that perspective and so maybe whatever you do that's a creative endeavor um and even if you don't have one maybe write in a journal and just write to yourself right now write to the self that you were in pain and write to yourself like write dear emily and then you can like literally burn these pages afterwards because if they're embarrassing and this exercise could be embarrassing write to yourself right now from yourself in a relationship that makes the one you just got out of look insane. Like just experiment with this. It's just a thing that I would, I would, I would advise myself to do this.

I've never even tried this. I've often written notes to myself from God. If you believe in God, you can maybe write a letter to God from you now, and then write what God would say to you. Like that, like write what the person, the benevolent spirit energy that wants the best for you what would that person say in response to the letter you wrote those are two exercises I think that would really help but also turn this into something no matter what it like right now you turned it into this there's art being made right now because of your breakup and you sound You sound young and I just want you to know that you truly will get over this person or you might get back together with this person. And I always want to tell people when they're going through breakups, this story ain't over

because you don't want to hear you'll find someone better. You don't want to hear there's someone else out there. You don't want to hear he was a piece of shit. You want to hear you could. It's just not now, but you could be back with this person. Take it from me. I have like gone back to X's years later where you go. It's burned to the ground.

Don't ever. You don't need to lose hope for being with this person. It's just not now. So no matter what everyone's telling you, there's someone else. The someone else might be that person just at a different time. And also listen to the song Romeo and Juliet by uh Indigo Girls it's a cover of the Dire Straits song Romeo and Juliet Romeo and Juliet get Indigo Girls on Spotify listen to that song and think about um the Romeo

character being this guy asking for you back and uh and and that helped me visualizing this guy coming back and singing the song to me someday like on my underneath my balcony made me be able to get through a pretty hard breakup recently andro any advice yeah i i just think like to your point the you know you said he's the one and and he might be the one like nikki said the future. But that doesn't mean you have to wait around for him to come back. You know what I mean? Work on yourself. Understand that you now have time to just be selfish.

And not care about him or any other. You're not working on yourself to meet someone else that's going to take his place. You could just literally focus on yourself and being the best version of yourself, and you have time to do that that maybe you didn't have before. And so that's all. I think the best advice for a breakup is just don't think, how am I going to replace this? Or how is this going to come back?

How can I take care of myself the best way possible and that's emotionally physically and you're and you have the time now which is great if if this is a breakup where you get replaced in his life by someone or you feel like it you were rejected because of something you didn't do right and you couldn't you're not good enough for this guy which is mostly how breakups end is you don't feel you feel like you that you don't want to end you when you get broken up with you just go oh my god I wasn't good enough for this person clearly they're rejecting you but something that Rachel Feinstein told me one time when a guy that there's no reason why this guy shouldn't like me like why doesn't and the truth is they can't they aren't capable it's not about it's not because

you're not hot enough it's not because you're not cool enough or whatever enough they literally a lot of times guys or girls cannot they don't have it within them to love as much as you require loving needing love like I require someone to like be pretty obsessed with me and give me a lot of attention and that is a not for every guy there is someone out there though that will match my needs and I don't need to diminish my needs I don't need to be less needy or like want that I need to the exact way whatever you want is what you want and don't feel bad about it Rachel I remember told me she goes this wanting this guy to love you he literally is incapable of the kind of love that you seek in a relationship but he's good to be with a girl who won't require that who

also has the kind of same similar makeup of someone who's like I don't need that I don't need deep love because she probably can't feel it so usually people that aren't able to give love tend to seek people who aren't ready to accept love so they find each other and then that just turns into a big old mess but I found now that um when I get rejected it might not be true but I always tell myself they they couldn't love me as much as I needed to be loved and I look to the sky and I got rejected recently once. I got rejected recently hard on a thing that I had so much hope for. I was in love, all these things and I got

a text that's fermented, cemented and fermented. It started to stink and I'm going to get to eat it from a pickle jar in a little bit. Kombucha now. It ended in this text and I seriously felt, I was like, I want to go cry. I can't was like i want to go cry i can't wait to

listen to taylor swift i can't wait to call all my friends but the first reaction i swear to god as i looked up like at god or whatever and i just said thank you thank you for protecting me from this person and doing what i couldn't do for myself letting them take themselves away from me because that would have caused me a fuckload of pain and i wasn't i i wasn't ready to end it even though it you know it's not good now and i just said thank you and i was able to turn that rejection into like god made that happen like the because i'm not strong enough yet to reject that kind of thing that's not good enough for me someone had to step in and go no she doesn't she can't handle that take that take that away from her right now it's like a parent being like he's not allowed to have those sweets i know you step in and go, no, she can't handle that. Take that away from her right now.

It's like a parent being like, he's not allowed to have those sweets. I know you want it, but he's going to choke on that. And you want that candy, but you were going to choke on it, bitch. Also, go get dicked down, you know? No, no, no, no.

Do not do that. Brandy, no. Or Emily, no. Emily, no. Just get a good dicker down you know brandy's not listening anymore we know she dropped yeah yeah i'm not sure you guys would give her this advice but something that really helped me during a really really really bad breakup where someone broke up with me uh is that i just binged comedy i just watched so many comedy specials and it was it just took

it just it was awesome yes try to watch things that like uplift you even watch ted lasso literally go watch ted lasso emily immediately and i i only say that as someone who was going through the worst depression last year and i reluctantly watched it because my friends were in it and i had to for work kind of because like you know professional relationships were on the line if i didn't consume this thing and then i ended, it got me out of my depression. Ted Lasso. 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities. I'm Joel. Oh, and I am Matt. And we're the hosts of How To Money. We want to be with you every step of the way

in your financial journey this year, offering the information and insights you need to thrive financially. Yeah. Whether you find yourself up to your eyeballs in student loan debt, or you've got a sky-high credit card balance because you went a little overboard with the holiday spending, or maybe you're looking to optimize your retirement accounts so you can retire early,

well, How to Money will help you to change your relationship with money so you can stress less and grow your net worth. That's right. How to Money comes out three times a week, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for money advice without the judgment and jargon.

Listen to how to money on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back at the daily show and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with the daily show ears edition podcast. Dive into john's unique take on the biggest topics in politics entertainment sports and more joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors and with extended interviews and exclusive weekly

headline roundups this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else ready to laugh and stay informed listen on the iheart radio Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Good people. What's up? It's Questo. Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with guests you definitely don't want to miss.

Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical effort. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements, some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers. But we also love speaking to the folks who are making it happen behind the scenes and they paved the way for those that followed. You know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations, like I'm Pete Bill chatting up with hitmaker Sam Holland, sugar Steve chatting with the legend Nick Lowe, and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow,

Sonata Matreya, Kathleen Hanna, and The RZA. These are conversations you won't hear anywhere else, so make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, alright? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

What if you asked two different people the same set of questions? Even if the questions are the same, our experiences can lead us to drastically different answers. I'm Minnie Driver, and I set out to explore this idea in my podcast, Minnie Questions. Over the years, we've had some incredible guests. People like Courtney Cox, star of the infinitely beloved sitcom Friends,

EGOT winner Viola Davis, and former Prime Minister of the UK, Tony Blair. And now, Mini Questions is returning for another season. We've asked an entirely new set of guests our seven questions, including Jane Lynch, Delaney Rowe, and Cord Jefferson. Each episode is a new person's story with new lessons, new memories, and new connections to show us how we're both similar and unique. Listen to Mini Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. I'm Tomer Coyne, LinkedIn's Chief Product Officer.

If you're just as curious as I am about the way things are built, the insights behind what it takes to create a world-renowned product, then tune into my podcast, Building One. There's so much to learn, like how Patagonia innovates with its supply chain. We had to go out to farmers and convince them. It was really damn hard. Or the way Adobe thinks about the first interaction somebody has with Photoshop. I was always so fascinated by how people navigate and find their way. Ever wanted to know how Nike builds emotion into the Jordan brand? You have to be obsessed with the current state of the human condition. And it doesn't stop there.

What about how Gleam reinvented knowledge search with AI? You can learn about how a Michelin star chef is redesigning seeds for flavor and how Pixar is nurturing a creative culture. Listen to Building One on the iHeartRadio app, Apple, or wherever you get your podcasts. Next voice memo from Rachel. Hi, Nikki, Andrew, and Noah. I have two things, so I'll try to be real quick.

The first one is I really, really, really hope y'all add Houston to your tour because the last show I saw was y'all in houston before everything shut down and i had just the worst experience um right before the show i was sobbing and i couldn't even enjoy the show because i was just thinking about what had just happened before and so i'm hoping um y'all come back to houston i can make up for that really bad experience um and see y'all come back to Houston. I can make up for that really bad experience and see y'all again and actually get to enjoy it this time. And secondly, I just wanted to thank both of y'all for always being so open about not drinking. I bought that book that Nikki has recommended, and it is a game changer. So I love that y'all are open and positive about that. And I'm looking

forward to being in the same boat. So thanks again. Love the pod. Love y'all are open and positive about that. And I'm looking forward to being in the same boat. So thanks again. Love the pod. Love y'all. Bye. Oh my gosh. Love her so much. Can I just really quick say I tuned out of what happened that night because I got a text

and I got distracted. She didn't say what it was. She didn't say. But she wasn't able to go? She was able to go, but she couldn't enjoy the show because something bad had happened to her before. Oh, no. Oh, no. And you know what?

Okay, I'm sorry. I just wanted to be honest. I did tune out because I got a text that was supposed to be a yes or no, and it was like a paragraph, and then I got swept into it. So I apologize for that. But that was already such a stressful time with COVID. I love your hair, by the way. You look so 80s right now. Really? it doesn't she look like you were like kind of gazing at me and i'm like oh he's judging me because i smoked pot he's like thinking i'm off my game today no but really

you were like i like her hair yeah i think you look like uh like if you're what's the wrestling show glow i'm in like a hair band right glow like you could be a main actress and i know i'm really leaning into 80s like my hair no you look badass i like it like i like be a main actress and i know i'm really leaning into 80s like my hair no you look badass i like it like i like i it's crazy but i just like thank you headphone hair bad head um i uh yeah that it was that show was that our last show it was like dallas houston we did that last weekend before things shut down. Yeah, it was a weird show because everything was coming to an end. It was right before the beginning of the end.

And I do hope to reschedule in Houston. And sorry for whatever happened to you. That's another thing. You never know what the audience is going through. Yeah, they're going through real shit. And like Noah said toily like watch comedy to get out of your head like i do know that people go to comedy shows and like get to forget their worries and sometimes i i mean i could have brought up something that triggered something for dear uh lucy what's her name rachel rachel dear rachel um sorry sorry rach uh i could have you

know i don't think it sounds like it wasn't something I said. But like, honestly, I've ruined people's nights because of something I said that triggered them. And like I talked about on Bill Maher, like, if I talk about molestation, someone's going to get triggered. There have been people molested in the audience, that person running to the bathroom having a panic attack, I will apologize to you afterwards. But I hope my joke about it that made you suffer will do more good because all the other people that were able to hear it because they didn't suffer that trauma but

I will have a private talk with you and give you my apologies for making you feel that way and try to explain my reasoning and maybe learn that it's not worth it for what I made you feel but and the not drinking thing how many shows have you been to by the way like concerts shows where you got into a

fight on the way there and then you hate the person you're with the whole time or like something happened and you're just like not in the mood there's nothing like worse than when you're in a bad mood and you should be the happiest you've ever been it makes you more upset because you're you like because you can't be i can't enjoy dave yep because you fucking you know i don't know didn't pick me up and for like an hour you were an hour late because you were having sex with my best friend man and now i can't enjoy dave matthews i went to a lord concert and she was young so she was like still finding her like stage presence and it was a cool thing to see but it was she was a little it was it's actually a good job i don't want to criticize at all i like

i love lord it was after her first album and my ex and i on the way there got ice cream and something happened where it was just like i said something he did something and it just took a really terrible turn where we weren't we were having that moment where we it was a rocky road that's so stupid and funny uh it was it was at cold stone i tipped them so they'd start singing and i didn't have to like deal with his steely silence um it was at goldstone though but i remember something happened in there and I was just like so sad. He was so mad. And we went to the show

and it was like so uncomfortable because all I wanted to do was sing and dance and I could tell that he like hated everything about me and was not going to want to see me be joyous. And so I was trying to respect that of like not being annoying. It was awful. We left early.

So I want to remember that though before I do shows to like try to either upend that or uh or just honor it and i'm just i i honestly like never thought about sobriety or like like not because i didn't go to aa i like i didn't like do like certain things like i had rock bottoms but not like a rock bottom rock so i never really think about like being any kind of role model in regards to not drinking but like if we could show that we're cool and fun and chill and can go out and like show other people that like you can be your best fucking self and be a goddamn rock star without drinking like that means so much to me and it

really does and like her acknowledging that and i don't know i just like i you know i forget that people that that to me was such an early thing that i had to dispel for people of like how do you have fun and now it's been 10 almost 10 years of not drinking alcohol and it's like that's so not even it's just laughable that that's the only way you could have fun now I always say to people like the fun you thought you were having you suddenly are in the go to the same things, do the same stuff, don't drink

and then see if it's fun if it's fun you'll stay and if it's not fun you'll just leave and guess what they won't even know that you left because they're drunk so what stopping drinking does is make you go towards the things that are genuinely fun and not stay towards the things that are genuinely fun and not stay at the things that are fake fun yes and yeah not things that you don't want to be at that you then try to make fun through drinking yeah you just go actually i don't want to go to that

thing that's all i can only do if i'm drunk and it's scary listen if you're out there and you're like not wanting to hear this you're not not ready, enjoy it. And fucking enjoy drinking, because it is wonderful. It's good times. But if you're ready to maybe consider stepping away from it, like our listener shared, Rachel, you can, I love that she had so many good things

that I thought she was a separate caller. You can pick up that book, Alan Carr, Easy Way. There's tons of them for alcohol and um there's one like to moderate easy way to moderate drinking i would just say go all in on the one that's to stop drinking and if you're ready the book take your time with the book you will start to feel the book working and it gets scary and maybe you'll put it down because you're not ready to stop drinking that's what i had to do with the stop smoking book i was not ready to stop smoking so i was like i feel it working i don't like this i're not ready to stop drinking. That's what I had to do with the stop smoking book. I was not ready to stop smoking. So I was like,

I feel it working. I don't like this. I'm not ready to like, so I put it away. But then I had a bad experience with cigarettes and I was just like, pick it up, read it quick. So just buy the book to have on your shelf to just sit there for when you're

having a moment where you're like, I really want to be fucking done with this and then just read the fuck out of it. And you can drink while you read it, by the way. So you don't have to quit before you read. Again, that's Alan Carr.

Don't drink too much. Then you won't remember any of the chapters he just got no yeah you'll know to go back he walks you through it he repeats himself so much because he knows he's dealing with uh you know and by the way i stick down we're not perfect i smoke weed still so i still i i had an eating disorder for most of those 10 years so like other things get amplified it's not a fix-all but it definitely was a huge changing factor in my life before and after drinking. Brian, Brian has something he wants to get ahead of. Interesting observation. Hey guys, I'll keep this under a minute. That's good advice on the show today.

I just want to comment on Nikki and David Spade. Because, Nikki, I think that's your guy. I think you guys should go really well together. I've been a fan of his for a little while now. I think I like it. I'm 5'8", 150 pounds. I think I've appreciated seeing a wiry man in Hollywood just crush it for decades. Yes, Brian.

Yes. Like all of the women. Yeah. It's pretty impressive. And he's got Yes, Brian, yes. Like all of the women. It's pretty impressive. And, you know, he's got that sensitive side, too. He's kind of got that feminine energy thing going, which I always talk about. Hell yes. I don't know.

I think that's, I just wanted to call it out now. He's the one. Because I think you guys could have some real compatibility there. And, yeah, an opportunity for kind of that, you know, mutual admiration, mutual respect, which, you know, I'm sure is probably hard for kind of that mutual admiration, mutual respect, which I'm sure is probably hard for both of you guys to find. We look alike in certain ways. So I think I just want to call it now. All right.

There it is. Thanks, Brian. I love this. People have said this in comments when I've posted hanging out with him. David Spade is truly one of my – being friends with him is one of my greatest accomplishments in life it feels like just a dream come true he is someone that I even was talking about yesterday and I said something like if if you know my my potential husband has a is jealous of my relationship with Spade or uh in any way makes it so I can hang out with him less,

I will not entertain that relationship. So it sounds like dating David Spade would make sense then. But I will say that that is not our relationship. When I met him, he had a girlfriend. He is now single, but it just still hasn't taken that gone to that level. And and I think I think that's even though I freaking love him and he is sexy and like I see him. There's a reason why David Spade gets women. It's because he's charming as fuck. He's confident and he's hot. He just says even my mom, when we went out to dinner in LA she's like he looks 27 he looks I mean he's the same

she was like he Nikki you gotta go out she was like so sold but that's like I don't I also likes him because he's 5'7 150 pounds yeah what do you mean no that she is as well oh yeah she just

wants to match up yeah uh yeah it's um yeah i'm not i'm not saying it will never happen because i also i don't put anything off the table but for now it's uh it's like we're both we both don't want each other and i could see something like that for you though i mean whether it's him or not i could see you know the age gap does like there it is pretty i mean granted i'm dating a 25 year old i don't literally don't know how old he is i think i looked it up once and i've like forgotten it um but the thing is i i i want to be with someone who is at is has certain things that they're like i have certain requirements that he doesn't meet not because he's not good enough.

He could meet them, but I have a lot that I don't, I wouldn't meet his knowing what he's attracted to, too. So I would say that for us to be together, we'd have to change a little bit. But that would be probably good changes, and who knows?

But the age thing doesn't bother me. Wait, how old is he, Noah? I think he's probably 60, 58. Man, I was going to say 52. I'm way off. Maybe I'm way off. He seriously feels, I mean, you've met him. Okay.

He has the energy. He does eat dinner at 5 o'clock, but that's the only characteristic of him that would lead you to think he's older. He's very spry. Just plain chicken and broccoli but um no but my my thing with you is that you don't want kids so that actually opens up the window i think for you to fuck you could date 140 year old it doesn't they don't have to still be alive to throw the football when they're 17 you know what i mean like yeah no like you not having kids i think. And it opens to them dying and I having, like, another love of my life.

Which is their money. Like, you know, like, I don't know. I know that sounds, I'm saying that, like, you think that's a joke, but I'm not. Like, I kind of like the idea of an older man, like, getting great years with them, either splitting up when it's time to do it or, like, because I don't, also, I don't think relationships should be forever. Like, I don't know that i want that i want to even if something i do want it to be forever i entertain the fact that it might not be and that's going to be okay and that might be totally the best

thing for us well there's something to be said about dating someone else who kind of also has like a temporary relationship kind of mindset where maybe forever is a little much. Yes. Yeah. And I am like really, I mean, I love listening to Dave talk about girls because he's just like, he's good with women. I like hearing, you know, like I'm kind of turned on by those stories. Not like with my friend Dave, but like I could even like,

I could see myself being like, oh my God, like that's hot. Like he gets hot chicks. I'd feel like one of the hot chicks. So no, I love, I, i i we i love david spade and i love that that person thinks that we should be together it's very flattering noah next next caller okay a very sweet message from paisley oh this says anonymous hi my name's paisley i am from wisconsin and i listen to the podcast every single day on my way to my slavery job in corporate america and i just have to say

that every time andrew wheezes when he laughs a little bit of my soul comes back to me oh and it's just the best thing that i've ever heard in my life. So thank you, Andrew, for wheezing when you laugh. And thank you for making the rest of us laugh for real reasons, not just a wheeze laugh. So, oh, my God. That was kind of shitty at the end there, Paisley. Paisley, you know I loved that. I was feeling a little left out. You know the insecure, egotistical Nikki in me really was.

I was feeling a little sad that I didn't get a shout out and then I was like, oh, actually I make the wheezes happen sometimes. Even though a lot of times you are wheezing at your own things that we're laughing at. I'm just having trouble breathing. I'm getting older. Oh my God. No, people love your wheezy laugh. How long have you been getting

told about that laugh and made fun of for it? Or commented on it? A long time. A long time. I think i used to laugh a little bit louder when i was i don't know i think i just the older you get it's just like it takes a lot to laugh loud so i think the wheeze is a way to get to a laugh without killing yourself yes that makes sense but yeah no i think sneezes and laughs are really uh you could study them and learn a lot about that person because they were built of either feeling comfortable with themselves being loud or maybe needing a loud sneeze to get attention because they didn't get enough. There's a lot of psychoanalysis that you can, because it's a thing you choose.

Oh, what, like how loud you laugh? Deaf people don't make a noise when they sneeze. So it's honestly a thing that you're doing that you don't need to do. Oh, wow. And it's doing something socially for you that we don't know. But there's. Well, there's definitely something to like laughing loud. The same person that laughs like obnoxiously loud will probably listen to their music on their phone without headphones.

Like they're not really self-aware. Sometimes if there's a show. Or they like the attention of it. Oh my God, there's this one Reddit clip that is probably the most amazing video. It's famous and it's, because they were sharing things on Contagious Laughter, like the subreddit,

what is a video that makes you laugh every time you put it on? It is a, Noah, can you find it? It is called Old Man Can't Stop stop laughing I think it'll come up and it's it's at some comedy show there's a it's like a Branson-esque comedy show where they invite three members of the audience and this really funny guy who has a line for everything doing crowd work with these three old men and the one of the men starts laughing at his uh banter with one of the other guys sitting next to him and the guy in the middle is laughing so hard it's three guys on a stage and it's like a farm setting and the guy in the

middle starts laughing so hard and he's not miked but everyone on stage is like holy shit this laugh is so crazy and then the guy keeps doing the material with the guy next to him the laugh doesn't stop he just gets a microphone and puts the mic in front of this guy the crowd and everyone on stage laughs for 10 minutes straight with nothing happening except this guy's laugh. And it makes them laugh for so long they can't stop. Noah, were you able to find it? Yes. So I would go to about like a third of the way in and we'll get a sample.

Can you tell people what to search for so they can look at this? Because I want people to watch the whole video, but we're not going to show it now. Funny old man laughing on YouTube. Okay. So here we go. This is the point. This show may be over.

This show may be over. So they're already laughing so much at his laugh but listen. You guys, this video. How long is this video, Noah? It's nine minutes. Yeah, I'm only at three.

You're at three minutes. There's six more minutes of hysterical laughter that just. And he doesn't want attention. He's just like a sweet old man in a yellow shirt. That's why it works. Yeah. So sometimes I think these laughs that are... He sounds like Porky Pig a little bit. Thank you, Noah.

So sometimes I think these people are... That laugh came from... But that laugh is... I mean, we're doing a pig sty or something. But it's so cute. I think there was this girl on an at our at an open mic and she would laugh like ha ha ha ha and it and it wasn't about everyone hated the like have you ever hated someone's like we all hated because one it felt

like she wanted the attention at the open mic you You know what I mean? Yes. Oh, yeah. People tried it, definitely. And it would actually drown out. Other people wouldn't laugh because her laugh was so horrible. Yes. Because, well. Also, you're in a room full of comics that are all pessimists. And I think that sometimes people, like, I used to do, sometimes I laugh in a way to give support to the comic on stage because

I know that they need it as a comedian so sometimes I'll project a laugh in a way or but a laugh can take you off your game a little bit if it's like obnoxious from the audience where it feels where it's just a woman that has a bad laugh and she's not trying to get attention she's like that guy in the yellow shirt where it's

like she can't help it and you don't want to kick her out but it's so distracting you're getting that guy in the yellow shirt where it's like she can't help it and calling and you don't want to kick her out but it's so distracting you're getting heckled in the nicest way possible yeah yep it's interesting most heckles are like nice but yeah it's one that she can't even help too that's what everyone asks too like whenever they meet like you're a comedian how do you deal with the hecklers and it's like easily like it's not oh i don't think it's easy at all first of all you just talk so much that they never get a chance to say anything well that's but when they do throw you

but most heckles aren't like you said they're usually like they're they don't even know their heck but it's it does i struggle with it i struggle with hecklers i don't like it i don't because i will ultimately just say the true thing which isn't very well sometimes now i'm finding it i can handle it now but there was probably you know 15 years that i was never wanted any audience interaction because i just didn't trust myself to be funny but now um now i'm just honest and but sometimes i could just create a dip that you're just like oh yeah like i did that the rhythm is off the private gig i did on saturday I went through a whole hour show and only had one awkward moment in a room of 50 people going up cold.

That is, Chris Rock might have the same thing. Not having one awkward moment, I was like, oh, I'm elite. Like I just, because, but even that awkward moment was still really uncomfortable and I had to dig myself out of it and I hated it, but those never stop.

You telling me about that gig and how you handled it, I'm just like so impressed. I mean, I wasn't even there and I could to dig myself out of it and I hated it, but those never stopped. You telling me about that gig and how you handled it, I'm just so impressed. I mean, I wasn't even there and I could just tell that you took over that room. And I just know those kind of people just because I'm from Palm Beach, Florida. And you just went in there and, I don't know,

it takes a different level of badassness. I put on a character, I had a talk with myself and I was like, you are a superstar they are so excited to have you here you have been doing this forever you are truly the taylor swift of comedy in terms of like how long you've been at it uh what you've accomplished within your field walk in there like taylor swift and i did i think like what happens is felt that energy is when people are around people with a lot of money and a lot of wealth, they instantly will go, I don't have that much money.

I drive a shittier car, whatever. I'm not worthy of their attention. And you so are. Oh. Like, that's like. And I do have as much wealth as them. Or I'm on my way to it. But not even.

No, no. Some people are like. But the thing is. But my point is, is like, don't put people on a pedestal just because of finance. I never did that. That would have not. That's a you thing you're putting on. Oh, for sure.

I would never be scared around rich people. Yes. Yeah. Even when I was broke, I was just like a you thing you're putting on. I would never be scared around rich people. Yes. Even when I was broke, I was just like, you think you're cool. I just want to say, last night I went to a dinner, amazing restaurant in town in St. Louis, and so delicious. Which one?

Greatest ambiance, Louie. Oh, I wanted to go there. So fucking good. I signed one of the plates, because they have famous people sign their plates, and I wrote, Jon Hamm and I had the most romantic dinner here

date here thanks so much for helping us celebrate our anniversary or something and I wrote Nikki but I was really proud of that one

because I know he's going to see it because it's the coolest place to eat in St. Louis he's from here so but I hate

the members that the waiter has to come up and tell us every ingredient that's in the specials and do this whole thing that they memorized and they're kind of rattling it off. I hate that when they deliver it, they have to tell you what everything is,

even though you know what it is. And they have all of these like presentations. And last night I was complaining about it. I go, I love this place. Let's get rid of that stuff. And they go, but it's like, that's like the, that's what some people come here and expect. They want that. And I go, it's elitist and it's stupid and's like the that's that's what some people come here and expect they want that and i go it's elitist and it's stupid and it's a waste of everyone's time

it's a waste of that girl's energy to memorize that on the way to work instead of listening to a bunch of songs she might want to play to get her amped for work to be in a good mood it's a waste of her time to go oh the ragu the the sauce with the rigatoni and the the bearnaise and like like it's making her life worse she's maybe she likes it but i'm guessing not she did a great job of it shout out to her um the chef delivering the things and telling us what each of it is it's like we're it interrupts the conversation that we were having and sometimes you need that because it's awkward you need some kind of thing sometimes it feels like it's about the waiter showing off. It's this, all this presentation,

which I guess is the restaurant showing off and slip like the, the turndown service. It's all rich people just being rich and it's pointless and it doesn't add that much more to your life. It just makes people work for you so you can sit there and go, I'm rich and it serves no purpose. Write it on a menu, write the fucking specials on a menu.

You literally a whiteboard she can come up to the table and go i'm gonna leave this here or do you want me to tell you about it do you want the number three or number five um but louis by the way in st louis that is the restaurant in town for sure delicious and everyone there was so nice and they're just doing what rich people want tonight yeah you should uh next uh listener mail i gotta piss oh man go piss all right just take this sorry noah okay okay andrew's. Go piss. Alright, just take this one. Sorry, Noah. Just take this one. Okay, Andrew's gonna go pee and I'm gonna take this one real quick. I'll catch him up.

Don't worry. Okay, this one's from Courtney. Hey guys, I was just listening to the news podcast and thought I had to tell you this story. In middle school, there was this boy in science who was supposed to read the word

organism and only said orgasm for about like reading maybe three pages of the textbook oh where was your teacher where that's everyone that's what everyone talked about that whole day about how amazing it was for him and how the teacher had to stop and say um it's organism and then everyone realized and then he was saying orgasm and then your teacher year dropped the ball oh my god college essay about that oh how crazy that's cute like he i mean i guess because he had like reading problems so i mean it was a very touching essay cute literally how the intro of the essay went about that whoa um bye oh and it's funny that you remember it i wonder how um you ended up hearing his essay maybe you're friends with him yeah that's really cool that he turned that into a

a good thing because how embarrassing um and i remember people mixing that those words up and not really knowing what an orgasm was that young. I forget how young you said you were at the time, but like you sometimes think I've just said the most disgusting bad thing. Like you don't understand that orgasm is like how you were made and it's like kind of scientific. So it's not that just in your teacher's reaction, like that's sometimes why I want to be a teacher so I can be like, oh my gosh, he said orgasm, orgasm instead of organism. Oh my gosh. I, I do that all the time.

Actually, I've heard really famous, cool people always get that mixed up. So I'd turn it and make it cool for him and try to, that's what teachers need to do. It's like Billy Madison. Mitigate that stuff. Yeah, peeing in your pants is cool. Yes, yes.

All right, so organism, orgasm was the mix up and he turned it into a college essay. This girl told us about. Okay, let's go to Stu. What's Stu got to say? Hi, besties. I have a pretty good mispronunciation. I was in my younger years working as a associate at Blockbuster Video up here in Canada. I was approached by a customer while I was working in the aisles.

He asked me if the movie Chaius had been returned. I looked blankly. I was like, I'm not familiar with that title, sir. Pause it. Chaius. What do you think he was talking about? I don't know. My brain initially went to like celloist.

I don't even know if that's a word. And then I'm trying to think of like what's chase. I mean, I just, let's keep listening. Maybe, maybe we'll get another clue before he reveals it. And you, why don't you show me the box and we'll see if we can figure out this one.

Walks over to its location in the store. And the movie is, in fact, titled Chaos. I was able to maintain a poker face until the gentleman left the store. And I had a good old chuckle with my coworkers. And to this day, that is one of my favorite mispronunciations of my life. Hope you guys are having all this well. Take care. You would think you would

mispronounce it chaos but but yeah it was that's why chaos was yeah i was thinking different but like of course you think of a ch word cha you're gonna the chaos is that's a chaotic word yeah it's a hard one to spell chaos i couldA-S-I could see you. Chaotic. Yeah, Chaotic. Chaotic. That's funny, though. And him trying to like, I was thinking maybe it had like, if it was Saw 2 or something, you would think it was like Saw-wee. But do you? Because it was S-A-W-I-I. And he would be like, do you guys have Saw-wee?

And they're like, what? Do you feel like the- Saw-wee. Oh. Yes, it would be him not telling him it's chaos chaos i feel like it's a disservice to the guy agreed but he was young and it was awkward gotta be honest with him yeah just be honest that's so funny all right more mispronunciations yes jess jess hey guys jess here uh such a big fan of the podcast. I've been listening to the first episode.

I've got a mispronunciation for you. And this word is something that my teacher said. This was back in fourth grade. We were reading stories for Halloween, and she said the word macabre. Oh, macabre. I won't give you the real word in case you want to guess what I'm saying. But she said macabre. And I knew it was the wrong word at the time, but I didn't want to correct her. She said fourth grade.

Because I thought I would embarrass her. And we loved it so much. Jess, you knew it, macabre. I still pronounce the word macabre that way today. We always see it and say it that way. I always say the r at say that so love you guys thanks this the saddest part is like some of these i hear them and i go what's a macabre like i don't even know what that macabre is uh when it's something is very gloomy and like dark and

like halloweeny pretty much halloweeny um macabre actually works for it's like abracadabra, macabre. Macabre, yeah. It's kind of a fun. It does. I like it. Like it's a macabre. Yeah. Yeah. Or it's like a bird, a parrot that's a French parrot, a macabre. Yeah, yeah, macabre. Yeah.

I feel like these mispronunciations, like mince, oh my God. It's fine. Mine-a-mincia. I think you were. Yeah, mine-a-mincia. The pronunciation, mine-a-mincia. My name is. Yeah, I think you were. Yeah, my name is. The pronunciation. My name is. It's a mess.

But you know, it's one word that a tenak. Tidlin is a word that I always think of. You know what that is? Well, no, it was Mexico City. Oh, and I. I just remember my history teacher from high school. I was going to. Oh, the one that gets me.

I still can't say it. O-A-X, it's Oxoxa. It's a Spanish, it's a Mexican town, I think. O-Oxoxa. Oh, yeah. O-A-X. In California, right? Yeah, I mean, it definitely has offshoots.

It gets referenced all the time, I think, in food. Do you know what I'm talking about, Noah? Oxtail? No, it has no, it doesn't sound like it's written at all. Hold on. Let me just like type it in real quick because people just, yeah, Oaxaca. O-A-X-A-C-A. And it's Oaxaca.

Oaxaca. Oaxaca. That word really throws me all the time. I can't ever remember the pronunciation and i and i apologize to any spanish-speaking peoples out there for my uh butchering of your language um oh but uh yeah like the mispronunciation like we we what if you know whoever made the word wanted it to sound differently and then someone else like ran with it you know like yeah like mispronunciation i'm just saying like with like then and then like

that girl has a joke with her sister though because there was this girl in a high school play that me and my sister saw and she was the line was and my moron sister but for some reason her mind was thinking about the next line she goes and my moron sissy and we were like we thought saying sissy instead of sister was so funny. I always call her hey moron. It's short for moron Sisty. It was our inside joke. It's just so ironic

to call someone a moron and then say the word moron Sisty. To literally be a moron right after saying moron. I did that with Recovic. I told my older brother. She's from Recovic. after saying more. Yes, yes. I did that with Reykjavik. I told my older brother, I was like, she was, you know,

you know, she's from Reykjavik, you know, to Poland. She didn't seem that smart. And Reykjavik is obviously an Iceland. I learned later. The beautiful irony. All right.

Let's finish up. One more. Chrysanthemum, I can't say. Oh, boy. I don't even. I say handsome thumbs. Chrysanthemum. Chrysanthemum i can't oh boy i don't even i say handsome thumbs chrysanthemum chrysanthemum jesus chrysanthemums oh i just i i don't like it either oh let's look at this look at this guy's name artina it's a girl i think art artina artina i think that's

short a-r-t-i-n-e-h okay good i want to just try to get it right. Oh, yeah. Let's try to guess. Artinay. Artinay. Artinay. Artin. Artin. I think it's Artin. I think we don't pronounce A. I'm going with Artin.

Hi, Nikki. Hi, Andrew. My name is Artinay. I live in Los Angeles. I'm a huge fan. Thanks, Artinay. Nikki, you were always my favorite roaster on the Comedy Central Roasts. Thank you. Your voice is so good.

This is an ASMR voice. Oh my God. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. Oh my God. This is so soothing. Thank you. Thank you. And this is the only podcast I've ever listened to more than one episode of.

So thank you. Thank you. And Andrew, I think it's so adorable that you were crying listening to the voice messages. I think it really shows that you care about the impact that you have on your listeners, which is so cool. So thank you for sharing that too. And I just wanted to share real quick that my sister and her husband were at my house yesterday

and my brother-in-law was reading a headline to us out loud from ESPN and he was reading that Kobe Bryant was inducted into the basketball hall of fame posthumously and my sister and I had to break it to him that he was actually inducted posthumously and he felt really dumb I would have said that thank you for letting me share and i love you guys i literally thought she was going to tell us that was what he read like that was the correct thing but what he did say but because i thought it's posthumously like i thought it could be both honestly i think that was a word that you might have said before someone said that you didn't say it right and i would have never posthumously

it's posthumously and that is stupid and i agree with you on like it should be the way and um it's so funny that she just gave one that we would have done and she just saved us art and a you really did and your voice i literally want you to make asmr videos because it's just like so gentle and was filled with such like kindness and there was a crispness to it that was like so comforting to me and i closed my eyes while she was talking and i i kind of got lost in it and if you name your daughter like art art today like it might be not gonna be a bitch she's gonna be a nice i feel like your name is so freaking important it is important um i'm gonna Artinay for the rest of the episode

and just speak with this. God, Artinay, if you have children, they are so lucky. And if you have anyone who is a loved one in your life is so lucky because you just sound so loving. Until she yells and then it's like, man, Artinay. Artinay does not yell in my world. Artin. Oh, my God.

She'll yell. Yeah. I mean, Artinay, you are a um a grammar nazi no uh yeah you i'm glad you made him feel stupid but you would have made me feel stupid too but i should art today is smart and she tells it like that's what art today does uh well please let's be friends i heard you live in la and i'm open to that final thought um we gotta wrap this up. I love this. I love this episode.

This was really fun. I could do this all day long. You didn't even finish. There's so many more, so we'll have to do this again. Well, great. We will definitely do this again. I hope you guys enjoyed it. Thank you for sending in those voice memos

and thinking of us in these funny moments of your life and reminding me of so many great moments on the show. And I love you i really do thanks for listening we're gonna do this forever i mean i'm gonna do this for this is what i want to do forever so um i hope you're in it for the long run yeah fanthrax i mean until we go to each other's funerals yeah i mean it could all end tomorrow we don't know building you know apartment buildings collapse that's my new fear oh my i was with this couple last night speaking of that and the one wanted a shoulder surgery and they're and the doctor's like well you know 10 to 15 years uh it might be better

the surgery might be better so maybe you want to wait because you're still you know only 40 and the wife goes yeah but you don't know if you'll have tomorrow and it was such a dark thing for a wife to say to a husband yes he doesn't know if he'll have tomorrow. And it was such a dark thing for a wife to say to a husband. Yes. He doesn't know if he'll have tomorrow. And by the way, we need to up your insurance policy. Yeah. Now that we're talking about my shoulder surgery,

speaking of insurance, how much am I getting when I murder you? We don't have tomorrow, but I hope you do. Thank you for listening, besties. Thank you, Noah. Thank you, Andrew. And thank you to all the people we heard from today especially we'll see you tomorrow or Monday or we'll see you the next time on the show you know when it is uh don't be care and uh

Joel the holidays are a blast but the uh hangover, that can be a huge bummer. If you are out there and you're dreading the new statement email that reveals the massive balance that you may have racked up, well, you could use our help. That's right. I'm Joel. And I am Matt. And we're from the How To Money podcast. Our show is all about helping you make sense of your personal finances so you can

ditch your pesky credit card debt once and for all, make real progress on other crucial financial goals that you've got, and just feel more in control of your money in general. You know it. For money advice without the judgment and jargon, listen to How to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jon Stewart is back at The Daily Show, and he's bringing his signature wit and insight straight to your ears with The Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Dive into Jon's unique take on the biggest topics in politics,

entertainment, sports, and more. Joined by the sharp voices of the show's correspondents and contributors. And with extended interviews and exclusive weekly headline roundups, this podcast gives you content you won't find anywhere else. Ready to laugh and stay informed? Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decisions Decisions, the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid. Join your favorite hosts, me, Weezy WTF, and me, Mandy B, as we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love.

That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. With a blend of humor, vulnerability, and authenticity, we share our personal journeys navigating our 30s, tackling the complexities of modern relationships, and engage in thought-provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. From groundbreaking interviews with diverse guests to relatable stories that will resonate with your experiences, Decisions Decisions is going to be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get ready to reshape your understanding of relationships and embrace the freedom of authentic connections. Tune in and join the conversation.

Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Emi Olea, host of the podcast Crumbs. For years, I had to rely on other people to tell me my story.

And what I heard wasn't good. You really f***ed last night. It felt like I lived most of my life in a blackout. I was trapped in addiction. You had to grab the lamp and smash it against the walls. And then I decided I wanted to tell my own story. Listen to Crumbs on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. How serious is youth vaping? Irreversible lung damage serious. One in 10 kids vape serious, which warrants a serious conversation from a serious parental figure like yourself. Not the seriously know-it-all sports dad or the seriously smart podcaster. It requires a serious conversation that is best had by you. No, seriously, the best person to talk to your child about vaping is you. To start the conversation, visit talkaboutvaping.org brought to you by the American Lung Association and the Ad Council.