The Paikin Podcast - Cait Alexander: Why Canada Needs Bail Reform

Episode Date: December 8, 2025

During the pandemic Cait Alexander was brutally assaulted and almost killed by her then partner. He was soon out on bail, continued to intimidate her, and was never convicted because it took too long to go to trial. She joins Steve to share her horrifying experience with intimate partner violence, why she thinks Canada needs bail reform, and how the Canadian justice system failed her.Follow The Paikin Podcast: YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@ThePaikinPodcastX: x.com/ThePaikinPodINSTAGRAM: instagram.com/thepaikinpodcastBLUESKY: bsky.app/profile/thepaikinpodcast.bsky.socialEmail us at: [e-mail]

Hi, everybody. Steve Paken here. We are going to have a very difficult conversation today with someone who has tragically had firsthand experience with intimate partner violence. Kate Alexander thought she was in a dream relationship. Her partner was charming. He had a wonderful young child that Kate was bonding with, and everything seemed great until Prince Charming began to beat her, almost killing her in the process. The man was charged with offenses that were serious enough to put him behind bars for a decade, But then adding insult to injury, he skated. The justice system failed Kate and turned her from a victim into a woman on a mission, never to let this happen to anyone else.

Kate Alexander, one-on-one, coming right up on the Paken podcast. Kate, the first question is not going to be complicated, but I really want to know. How are you? You know what? You have been one of the only reporters that I've ever spoken to, and I remember this distinctly after our interview in April, virtually. The first reporter to actually ask me how I am, genuinely. I'm good. I'm good. So I, and so you get to say that in front of me, and I'm just, yeah, with such sincerity. So thank you. You haven't always been good. Yeah.

Let me, I mean, I hesitate to sort of tread this ground because it's very painful for you, but it has motivated the greatest mission of your life. So we are going to talk about this. Do you have any lingering physical effects from what transpired? Being in Toronto is pretty rough, we'll be honest with you. We're a short 15 or so minutes away from the house where it all happened right now. So it's always, hmm, it always feels like a risk coming here. It's always a probability of potentially running into the person who nearly took my life.

And it's, uh, because he is not in jail anymore. He's never been to jail. Never had a criminal trial. So it's, uh, it's always interesting to, interesting is the wrong word. I don't know. It's always a challenge, but it's also hopeful now because we've seen a lot of good things come out of something bad. And I have so many amazing friends here. Do you imagine that you will be dealing with the emotional after effects of the beating you took for the rest of your life? It will never go away. You can't not remember. But thankfully, I've had increasingly.

incredible somatic and nervous system regulatory therapies like EMDR, eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy. And that has helped lower the temperature in the room effectively on what happened. It's bilateral stimulation therapy of both hemispheres of your brain and mimics REM sleep and it helps it's one of the most proven it's proven to be the most effective for PTSD and so I've thankfully been able to access that and it has changed things and made it a lot easier and a lot better okay again with apologies but I think people need to understand what you've been through can you tell us what this man did to you this was your intimate partner for how long?

Seven months, but not very long. And that's what's so dangerous about IPV, intimate partner violence is it can happen almost overnight. So my ex who I cannot name because I've never been to trial. It's one of the things that bothers me the most is I'm not allowed to really publicly say his name because we've never had a criminal trial. He's never been convicted of anything. So it started off as the perfect relationship.

As these things always seem to go because why else would you fall in love with someone? You know, you can't start off hitting people because they probably won't want to be with you. So it started like that. It was COVID, 2021 January-ish. And I moved in with him rather quickly. I was living in Yorkville. he was in Leaside and, you know, COVID times, nobody was, no one had any friends to hang out with. So you're lonely, right?

And it's winter, COVID and winter loneliness that it really, it really gets to you. And so that transpired rather quickly. But on the premise of all things being rosy and all things being good, I mean, my parents thought that we were going to get married. That's how manipulative and crafty he was. And he had a child from a previous relationship, yes? Yeah. whom you were very close with. The reason I stayed.

And so five months go by. It's around May, my birthday. And we have private chef come to the house, whatever, friends come over. And that's when the behavior started to shift immediately. He, the first time he ever was violent. So at the end of May, we had a bunch of people, over pool party and he threw a chair over the at the neighbor's adjacent property for some unbeknownst reason just out of the blue grabbed a mason jar shattered it on the pool deck i started

cleaning up because i didn't want the dog to get hurt and he came and he kicked me into the glass which then precipitated a war with his male friends and they got into a fist fight and everyone scattered and that became sort of the first moment of okay what this is weird behavior and i hadn't ever really seen something like that before uh so i accepted the apology that came after and thought okay it won't happen again he was intoxicated etc etc then as a as a thank you we went to quebec to a spa because again we're in covid so we can't go very far Everything's under serious regulation, and we went to a spa and came back after the night to go to the hotel, and he again had been intoxicated. But I don't know what made him angry.

I was driving the car because I did not want him to drive drunk, and he grabbed my head and smashed it into the driver's side window. Right out of the blue. Out of the blue. He's a big guy. He's 230. is found six two six three and i froze i i had never been hit like that i didn't like what the the it's like it's like it's like a movie you know the lights just flash up and you can't can't don't know what to do next and so that solidified it for me and that you know this is this is dangerous i

I remember my nervous system changing almost instantly in that moment of, okay, how do we, how do we stay safe? How do we, what's the next best thing to do? And he's obviously not intoxicated at this moment, so he can't blame the booze. So it's not a viable excuse because it only, and I always say this publicly, drugs and alcohol do not cause violence. the behavior pattern exists to begin with it just amplifies it and so that began the cycle that was like mid-June and by July 31st I was nearly dead how I was shooting a Hallmark movie up in Barry it was on nights came back at Saturday July 31st morning and around 8 a.m. and I could just tell that he had been awake all night and he was calm when I first walked in

and I went to bed because again I've been on night's shoots. I was exhausted and I woke up and for some reason something had shifted in the house. I don't really know. I don't know what he was upset about. And then I made lunch. I started taking pictures of things. Instinct, not really sure what it is, but I have pictures of like the lunch that I made from that day. And that was around 2 o'clock in the afternoon.

And then by 4.30, 5 o'clock, he was enraged because he could not find his car keys. And started to beat me for it. He just, it actually really started. He started just trying to burn my handbags on the stove. They would lit up the gas and dangled the bags. and i started getting angry at him for that because i was like don't burn my stuff and it just started a war so uh he eventually got me corralled upstairs in the upper part of the house and beat me nearly to death at uh all six three of him just pummeling my head into the floor

split my head open on a doorwell uh got on top of me gouged my eyes out with his thumbs like that that was pretty sick i mean i'll never forget that like just that feeling of yeah it was pretty uh pretty repulsive and i he had taken my phone too so i didn't have any means to contact anybody but he went downstairs momentarily and at 6.09 p.m i sent a a what's up message to on my computer, I grabbed a computer, took as many, I don't even know how to get on the photo booth app in present day, but somehow in that moment I knew how to get to that and started taking photos and videos of everything that he was doing. And those are public things that everyone's seen on the news. And yeah, he, he carried on until about 83845 that night. So I'm very

lucky to be here it's uh it's sick but i have it all on video did anybody call the police so my friend who i contacted on what's up i said please help the only two words i could manage to get out and i didn't know what was going on i stopped responding because i'd obviously have to shut the computer at different moments and then that friend had the wherewithal director friend of mine for like 10 years or something and had the wherewithal to be like, yeah, this is weird. Kate doesn't ask for help, but, you know, like, I don't really understand what's going on. I don't know where Kate lives.

I don't know what to do, but I know her agents. So called my agents, and my agents ended up calling the police eventually. And what happened to the man who beat you? He went on the run. So police never got him? Not yet. Not yet. He went out just.

before the police arrived i was in and out of consciousness at some point i had showered tried to clean up he started up again it you know my body can only take so much and there was you know my head was splutter in three different places so it's just whatever it's chaos um he went out like a normal psychopath does and walked the dog covered in my blood at the because the dog had to be walked. And that's the moment the police arrived. It was just some weird timing. And then he saw them on the ring camera and started threatening my life. I had still had my computer. I've actually seen the body cam footage of me in the front window. And he said, if you let the police in, I'm going to go kill your family right now. And me, concussed, covered in my own blood after four hours

of this. I was like, yeah, you probably will. So I have no reason not to believe you. So yeah, you're damn right, I'm not going to let the police in. And they surrounded the house and I was screaming at them. I mean, there is, I've heard one of the female officers on the body cam footage say, like, well, what is she doing? Like, I don't understand. She's barricaded herself in there. We know she's in there. We know she's hurt. But she will not come out. Well, because you've got someone in your ear who literally just almost took your life and they're threatening to take your family's life. And so what are you trying to do protect your family it's it's a place of absolute illogical fear but the rationale in that moment actually adds up and makes sense so a male police officer i told them to come around the

side door because i knew my ex could hear everything on the ring camera so i told the police to come around the side door and the one male officer actually you know locked eyes with me and put his boot in the door and said i'm not coming in more but just keep this door open and then after they were worried about a hostage situation. So what's happened in previous is the police leave and the abuser is actually still in the house and then someone ends up dying because the police don't even mean.

So I guess they call the surgeons and the sergeants and the tactical team. So the SWAT team came. They surrounded the house and again, this illogical, logical, rational, irrational place that you're in and such extreme trauma, when the SWAT team came, you know, they're yelling through the microphones

and I can hear it. And they're like, if you don't let us in, like we're breaking through these doors. We have grounds to do that. Like, we don't know what's going on in there. And I was like, I'm going to get sued. Like I was worried about the, I was like, because after being in such an abusive relationship,

you're like, well, if he breaks the door, if they break the door down, the door is going to be broken. And then I'm going to be liable for the door being broken. Your head goes there. Yeah, that's literally the, of, I don't want him to get mad because the door's going to break. That is really where, like this is where we're at. And that's when I let them in.

And I will never forget that. Seven big dudes with guns and red lights. It's, again, another very cinematic moment. And I was terrified. Just terrified. it it all got very real and there was like I couldn't articulate everything that it happened to me because I didn't like in this giant wave of male energy you know I just gotten done being beat by a big guy now I've got seven big guys with guns telling me that I need help and you just need petrified they sent two male paramedics in and I refused medical attention because they were male so they should have sent some women absolutely that's something that we're working with Toronto police and that we're working with the government on on helping

resolve because there was actually a female officer who's a survivor as well she came from a totally different unit but she heard the call and she's like this is bad and I should go but they wouldn't let her in the house because I don't because she wasn't in that unit or from a different division or something just utterly ridiculous so I refused medical attention because I was conscious I was able to do that. And they're like, you need to go to the hospital. You are bleeding from your skull. And I'm like, well, he's going to kill my family. So we were, no, I'm not going. And I went and I found him. How did that immediate situation ultimately resolve itself?

My ex knew he was in trouble. I went down to the house party that he had fled to. Carwood and bruises. Everyone is like, what the hell is going on? Like, this is weird. Apparently, and I have found this out within the last year after the Toronto Life article, was publicized that my ex had gone to that house, set a whole bunch of incredibly racist things and tried to cut someone open with a razor blade. Yeah. So absolute night of terror.

And men at that party had helped lower, lower that level of aggression somehow. And when I arrived there, it was just, I was keeping tabs on him. Because in my head, it was like, okay, as long as I know where he is, I know he's not at my mom's house. that's what it is very simple and but stupid

absolutely 100% stupid but at the time I'm alive so whatever it was it was the right thing to do uh god it's hard not to say his name um I want to protect people but uh yeah so that Sunday morning he goes and goes on the run and this is this is when I realize he's like a real criminal he knew that if he turned himself in Because they parked, he had two houses in Leaside. So they parked at both houses, cops all night, all day, 24-7 surveillance, you know, ready to get this guy.

The, he, my ex knew that if he turned himself in on a Sunday because it was a long weekend in August, he wouldn't get out till Tuesday. That's how much he knows. Like, I don't know, it's not my, not my breadth of knowledge at this current moment, but okay. And so he waited until, I think, Monday night and then turned himself in. And he was out on bail for $500 and the next day. So he never spent a night in jail, not even a night in jail. I don't know. I think he spent a night.

I think he turned himself in on the Monday. Yeah, he turned himself in on the Monday. And by the Tuesday, he was out in the morning. How long before you started to feel kind of normal again after taking that much punishment? The first, a reasonable moment, I think, was at 9 a.m. that Sunday. So this happened on July 31st, Saturday. This was a Sunday, August 1st. I drove myself to Sunnybrook.

You know, there was a first moment I was alone. He was on the run. I went back to the house, saw the scene, and it all just, oh, that's my blood. Oh, my head hurts. Oh, is my nose broken? And I texted him. And even though I had a restraining order, I said, like, am I, like, is anything broken? Like, I was asking him.

Like, that's the psychological. Like, I'm asking him if I'm hurt. Like, it's that level of psychological warfare. And I got in my car and I drove myself to the hospital. I drove to Sonnybrook, parked, and they immediately put me in a private room. And we're like, the cats get in my entire body. And what did they find? absolutely nothing by the grace of god i don't know how but nothing was broken they couldn't stitch up

the wounds in my head because they were it wasn't clean slices there was one from the doorwell but nothing clean enough to stitch up so i kind of had to bled out for like six months um had epidermal hematoma they couldn't they didn't want to create more pressure in my brain uh the police came to the hospital and I just said I don't know where he is I knew where he was but I didn't know how to how to get out of it and I went and stayed at a hotel after I got out of the hospital I went to downtown and stayed at the ritz and then got my nails done which was so bizarre such a bizarre but I felt safe there because I was like at least I know that they'll have to you know let's no one can just enter you know I at least can control this environment and I like that spa so

I went to the spa covered in blood and bruises and I tried to put it back together. And that female officer that they wouldn't let in had given me her personal number off the books. And I am alive for the sake of her advocacy because she said, you take all the photos and videos of you and what he's done to you right now.

Get all of this. And I have hundreds of everything that he's done taken in the bathroom at the hotel. And he was immediately charged when the Swati mentored the house, but he had an increase of charges, let's just say that, which is not very common once all of that evidence was produced. And then I went, he actually picked me up from the Ritz on the Tuesday morning. He picked you up.

Yeah. Why did you go with him? Because he was threatening to kill my parents and nobody knew yet. And I hadn't told them yet. And I didn't, I didn't know how. I really didn't know how because here you are presenting

this image of well we're going to get married and this is long term and you know like this is and my family wanted that for me and I wanted that for myself and here we are with what should be the idyllic relationship and should be okay

because you know the dog and the kid and the you're still making excuses for him uh huh Uh-huh. And you're making excuses for yourself, too. It's, they, they have you so out of your own body and so fearful that as long as I'm alive, if I, if, if I can make him okay. If he's okay, I'll be okay. And that's sort of that, that cycle that you're caught in. And I was worried about my family. And because I, I mean, I saw his handiwork. I lived as sandy work. I know what he's capable of. I had no reason not to believe him. And the moment where I ended, when it finally clicked, if it didn't already, it was on the Wednesday, and he tried to have sex with me, forcibly, when I was in that state.

And that registered for me. I'm like, I'm going to die. That was the moment where I was like, oh, he's going to kill me. Okay, I get it now. I get what, I get what this is. He went, when I wouldn't have sex with him, he went on Instagram and was like, she's hotter than you, she's hotter than you, she's hotter than you, she's hotter than you. If you don't put out right now, we will call, I will call whoever and I will go.

And I said, okay, yeah, I'm going to die. This is, this is bad. I could not. I could not. I was so numb. I can even feel it now. I was so numb. It was the hardest,

the hardest thing I've ever had to say to anyone. And I went to the beer store. I don't drink. Went to the beer store, got a six-pack, locked myself in the movie theater room, drank like three of them and called my brother. Like I could not get the words out. had to have some liquid confidence some type of something and my brother's a six foot eight

Olympic athlete he's like what the are you doing like why are you like he's like where are you going and then I and he's like you need to get out of the house like I don't and he's like I don't know like you can't come here my girlfriend's here like and he's like where do you know you got to go somewhere and so I picked up and I went to my friend's house my friend's condo downtown that I knew that, you know, someone might get really hurt if they ever tried to find me there. And that's where I crashed out. My brother had some Olympic party that weekend with my parents. And he called me up and he said, I think I need to, I think I need to tell mom and dad, but I need your permission. And I said, I think it's time. And my brother told them, and they left the

party and immediately came and got me. Enter the justice system. Oh, boy. It's the worst part about this whole story. Well, that's why we need to talk about it. How did the justice system respond to what was pretty clearly an appalling situation? In the worst possible way. What does that mean?

That's the injustice system, Steve. It's not the justice system. It's an extension of abuse, additional trauma on top of what was already committed. and it would have been a very different situation had my ex not been let out on bail for, I don't know, dinner money the next day and I probably would have been able to put the pieces together if I didn't have the threat and intimidation of his physical presence. That was right from the get-go.

How does a guy who did what he did to you get out for 500 bucks? Ask Trudeau. So the federal criminal code punishments are insufficient to start with? It's criminal. It's lethal. So the judge did not have any personal discretion to make it a much higher threshold? Not by the law. It's really Bill C75 past 2018, 19, I think. a catch and release. It's basically, unless even murderers have been let out on bail for a couple thousand bucks.

That's the state of the nation. Okay. But he's charged at this point. Yep. So presumably at some point, he's got to go to court to answer charges. Did that happen? Never. Why not?

Jordan's rule. Circle back to their lovely Supreme Court. Well, there's a principle behind Jordan's rule, which is that if you're going to have justice, it has to be timely. And if the state takes too long to bring these charges against you, then you got to let him go. I mean, that's the principle at stake here.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. There we go. Yeah. So he got out on Jordan's rule. Yeah. The 2016 Supreme Court decision, again, as aforementioned, 18 months for provincial charges,

Superior Courts 30 months. And that is a weapon that is utilized by defense counsel and a weapon that is actually utilized by the crowns themselves because they force you into peace bonds with people who nearly take your life in order to, they'll use Jordan and say, well, it'll time out if you don't accept this.

So you either accept this and move on or we're not going to trial at all anyways. And it's completely, I mean, I am supportive of the premise of it. I would have loved to go to trial in two days. I think every victim survivor would like an expeditious trial. We don't want this to carry on for years, five year, whatever it is. It's so taxing. And you can't fully heal until you're completely severed from the relationship with your ex.

Okay, I'm going to go back on this again because my understanding of this is that the court made the decision it made in Jordan's case. case because they were not trying to pick on victims, obviously. They were trying to send a signal to provinces, to governments, that you guys are under-resourcing a system that needs more resources, therefore get your act together. So I know you're not happy with the court decision, but the court intended to lay the gauntlet down to provinces to get there, you know what, together. So who do you have more blame for ultimately? It's the provinces that are under-resourcing the justice system. I completely 100% agree with you, but there should have been a stipulation put in place that violence, they should have had the

foresight, shoulda-coulda, I'm 100% in agreement with the premise of it. I, again, would have won an expeditious trial, but they obviously didn't put the proper legislation or the gauntlet to the provinces to actually make them do it because they didn't do it. It all failed, all of them. and they love to point their fingers at each other and they love to say it's the provinces it's all y'all sorry it's all of you we need an asterisk on that ledges we need on that charter right we need to stop prioritizing criminals rights over victims right because canadian victims do have canadian victims bill of rights but there's a section in it that nullifies the entire agreement we've gone through this with the lawyers and we can we can we can

see it in the headlines. We see it in the streets. Criminals are not held to any type of account here, and they go and re-offend. And again, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I do believe the Supreme Court wanted something good to come of it.

Yes, we need expeditious trials, but not at the cost of justice. Have you had any contact with the man who beat you since all of that? He'd be very wise to never do that again. So the answer's no.

No. Or his kid? I am in touch with the child's mother because he's a serial abuser. And there's a woman after me. So he's done this to someone else? Many people. How do you know that? I've seen it, the evidence.

And he manages to continue to get away with it? Do you know how? We don't have a justice system. Has he tried to contact you? He would be very wise not to. I appreciate that he'd be wise not to, but that doesn't mean he hasn't tried. No. We just settled in civil court, actually, last week.

And can you talk about that? Lightly. It's, I, for pain and suffering and all the medical issues and loss of career opportunities, I mean, I couldn't work for an extended period of time. having to forcibly be moved move out of the country i mean he started stalking me it was about a month after it was august 30th i was at cafe nervosa in yorkville and he started circling around in his car and i was like he's gonna come after me and i and we have seen this countless times that because these very violent abusers are let out on bail it's a hall pass in their mind and they

go and they finish the job there's a probability that i wouldn't be here had i stayed in in Toronto and in this country. And I, you've moved to California. Full time. I'm not coming back. Yeah. So it's, it was the best thing I could do. I was so broken when I moved there.

But it gave me space and distance, and I'm very fortunate for that. Kate, if we had a justice system and not an injustice system, play your case out. what would have should have happened that night July 31st he should have been present there should have been that personal conversation he should have been held in custody I think the police did a relatively good job they were pretty supportive they were this guy needs to go. The female officer, she said, it's one of the worst domestic situations

I've ever seen in my entire 30 years of policing. It's bad. Yeah, I know. So that should have been taken into account. The fact that he was up on the most serious offenses. He should have been held in custody. So no bail.

We'll start with no bail. No bail. Okay. He eventually gets to trial. In the best of all worlds, he would have got to trial. He would have defended himself. against the charges. In your view, he would have been found guilty, and he would have gone away

for how long? Unequivocally, he would have been found guilty. I have videos of him beating me on video. There's no, he said, she said, there's no, I have the evidence, a plethora of it. And that's what's so traumatizing about this is we can, you and I can watch it right now. And the crowns told me, well, you have to accept a peace bond because you're up against a murder case and it's going to time out with Jordan and it ran past the other timeline. I had two sets of charges and it ran past the other timeline on the other case. So, you know, I don't know, better luck next time. You live in California.

Like literally. And I sat down. I actually retained a defense lawyer to represent me against the crown within the process of this. This is how crazy this is. And my lawyer looked at the crown on Corey Langdon, looked at the crown on the second set of charges and just said, all right, it's a public interest case.

This guy's obviously very violent. There's no reason not to believe her. Then what are you hanging your hat on? She's like, we don't have time. These charges would normally fetch what kind of sentence? What would be appropriate? 10 to 14 years? It's Canada.

so probably half that, but some pretty significant jail time with the number of charges that it was. Obstruction of justice, because he told me not to let the cops in. He had assault with a weapon, count, count, count, assault, assault, assault, assault, othering death threats, and and, and, and. I think the police missed a couple charges. There's a confinement aspect to this. They actually forgot the wooden rolling pin covered in my blood. They didn't take it from the crime scene because I found it the morning after, and I was like, holy, okay. So there was a couple things missed, certainly, but we should have at least had a trial.

And it's one thing to be acquitted. I'm all for fairness. I'm all for equitable justice. I'm all for the scales of that. I'm all for everyone being able to prove themselves in court 100%. But the fact that I was robbed of my right to a trial, that is the government, the justice system, and everyone involved in this provincial and federal. robbed something for me that I will never ever be able to get back.

That really sticks in your cross still, doesn't it? I can tell. Makes me angry. Yeah. You have taken that anger and rather than, you know, crawled under a rock, you have turned it into significant activism. It's almost as if your life has a new mission now. Talk to us about that.

What have you done with that anger? to alchemize it into something positive. Otherwise, I probably would have gone insane. It's been the journey of a lifetime, genuinely. March 26, 2024. So last March was my peace bond. And I called... And that means what?

Peace bond, the restraining order that lasts the year and says, you can't talk to her. So basically told my ex, you can't be in contact with her for a year. for a year or anyone she knows known to be, I live in L.A., you know, it helps me, I guess, when I was in Toronto, but. So it's expired? Mm-hmm. So he can now?

Mm-hmm. Yeah. But he would be well advised not to. Yes. Is that, okay, I'm going to ask a weird question here. Do you carry a gun? Not legally in this country. Okay, I'm going again here because maybe you do in California?

I have a weaponry in California, yes. That you carry with you on your person. Yeah, I actually got a really cool one from one of my girlfriends. It's called Bestie Defense, and it's a beautiful pepper spray, taser all built into one. And it's for these exact type of situations. And it's not legal in Canada. So no, it is not with me when I cross the border. But that is something that is in my car and my purse.

Kate, you're going to forgive me. You know, this is the journalist in me here that are saying, you said, I'm not allowed to legally have this with me on my person in Canada, which, you know, if I'm reading between lines, is you saying, it goddamn right, I've got it with me right now. I'm not legally allowed to have it, but I'm not going to leave myself unprotected just because I've crossed the border. Am I on?

I don't have it with me right now, but I'm also how I protect myself is A with the media, because the one thing my ex didn't want was people to know about this. It's the one thing. I remember him distinctly saying, and it didn't make sense at the time, but now it would be completely, they always leave little crumbs.

And then it all, in hindsight, comes back and loops around. Two things. This is tangential, but I'll loop it back in. He said, I pay good money to be off the internet. He does.

He said that. Quoting. Bizarre thing to say, but now this all adds up. And there was one time, I remember, he walked into the bathroom and he just says,

you know, even if I was a thousand miles away and you got hurt, you had slipped on a banana peel, I would still be blamed for it. And I'm like, I guess so. This was about three weeks prior. It's kind of a weird thing to say. It's a super bizarre thing to say. But that in my mind shows you the calculation of this is intentional. He knows exactly what he's doing. He got pleasure out of hurting me. So to protect myself, the media has actually extended the only semblance of justice and the public has extended the only semblance of justice. I'm never alone here. I'm always with someone.

I never travel alone. I am always in groups and groups of people. And that is largely how I protect myself. He wouldn't do that because then people would be in a public space because then people would know who he is. and he knows that if he messes around, he will be in the Toronto Star in five minutes. And I have to thank you all for that.

Really? You can't, but you're in a situation where you cannot leave yourself vulnerable to just doing what normal people do, which is going for a walk in a park someday by yourself. You don't do that anymore. Not here. Okay, more on the activist angle that you've taken now.

You have been meeting with politicians, federally and provincially, for many months now, what has come from that? Actually, something positive. And I'm very pleased to say that when, so Kristen Wong-Tam, MPP for Toronto Center, they brought me in. They were actually one of the first politicians that responded, even though I was not in their constituency.

Ted Arnett was my family friend. Really? You knew him before? My, he's the former speaker of the legislature. Former speaker, yeah, he's a, I've known him since. He's known me since I was in blankets, actually. So he is also my MPP for basically my entire life. And he's west of Toronto, Wellington, Hulton Hills or something like that.

Yeah. And my, our parents, Ted's wife knows my mom, et cetera. So it's, I contacted him. And he was speaker, so he couldn't get involved. But he said, he's retired now. So I'll say it. He's like, don't worry. I'll take care of this.

And so we got involved in politics right from the onset. And I didn't expect that. You know, I said, okay, put it on the news. It just snowballed. Okay, what did he do? Did he put you on to the Attorney General? I mean, I watched Doug in the chambers. Doug Downey, the Attorney General.

Downey, yeah, lie in the beginning of April. I think it was April 10th or something. Okay, just for the record, I have to say, that's Kate talking right now. the use of the word lie is a you know it's a hyperbolic word so let's just do you want to you want to rephrase that all i'll rephrase it um i watched doug had himself on the back a little bit too much about how they've handled IPV and it's not an issue but i have statements from his from his office stating that they're learning from my case and that they'll do better next time okay pacify me try to pacify me harder but again i have to thank the media of all of all stripes

that has given us this platform to actually advocate in the way that we have been and i'm very pleased to say that the forward government with the opposition we're really trying to bridge the gaps here these are nonpartisan issues it should not matter it does not matter i don't care what party you're from let's let's do things that are actually going to solve that solve this issue. So we, with the support of the opposition and Ishvander Rassel, our government outreach coordinator, who's very embedded in the Ford government, we've been able to actually have a seat at the table with them now. And what does that mean? Stakeholdership in a way that they're really listening. The Attorney General's office

is working with us on some development programs. We have access to all government branches. essentially whenever we want board has gone on the record and said, you know, the justice system is broken. He stated that himself. Bail is, this is terrible. You've mentioned that personal story about him, you know, going after the Home Depot, the guy at Home Depot or something. So they are aware and I'm very pleased to say that they're willing to work with us and they understand. I think it was today. I don't even know if this is public yet, but this is air after, right? So, Mr. Williams, Charmaine Williams, just declared IPV an endemic? Let's talk about that. Yeah. Because, of course, you and your allies have been urging,

and we've seen the opposition, certainly asked numerous questions about this at the Ontario legislature, trying to get intimate partner violence declared as an epidemic. You haven't got there yet. They've declared it an endemic. What's the difference? last year the difference is in the attitude the differences in the change of the the party of the conservative party is that you know they were denying the epidemic denying this was an issue a year ago and now they're saying okay you may be right and we are at least we'll give you this little token in in the language and the semantics of this um there's an acknowledgement. We had a series of testimonies at the beginning of January this year with

Jess Dixon. Kristen Wong-Tam was a part of that as well. And I came up and spoke at the legislature and so did many other survivors. And so that has been tabled into a 900-page document that is in the process of hopefully rectifying into something that is tangible and actionable steps forward to combat this issue. So massive shift in energy attitude. I ran into Minister Williams at a at a gallo the other week and we talked for a bit and the presence of the community and the presence of survivorship in this united front has actually, you know, seemed to really put intimate partner violence and sexual assault at the forefront and the failures of the justice system, circling back to the provincial responsibility funding this adequately that, you know,

and the crowns need to be educated, the judges need to be educated, all of these components. It's all at least at the front of everything right now. You do know, of course, that the provinces are responsible for administering these laws that are passed by the federal government, right?

These are criminal code charges we're talking about. Is this on the radar screen of the feds at the moment? Oh, boy. It would have been if we had a different result in the federal election, but I am proud to say that intimate partner violence was tabled for the first time as a campaign issue I was on City or CTV for that

the Conservatives tabled something about that and the liberals brought something in so that advocacy is is working in that regard it April 2004 I wrote the exact same letter

to Jag meet Justin and Pierre Pierre. Pierre responded in 48 hours Justin took seven months Jagmeet never did. The NDP did not respond. Zero. Absolutely zip. So I didn't expect to have

I've again this is I voted NDP in the Ontario election. I voted conservative in the federal election. It's not a partisan thing for you. It's not a partisan thing for me. It has nothing to do with that. But the Conservative Party of Canada on the federal level has been nothing but supportive.

Pierre, when that issued July 31st, 2024, when I had to walk out of the Status of Women Committee meeting and told the Liberal Party to fuck off, Pierre sent staffers over from the other building. And that's when I really started to understand firsthand how much they actually cared about this issue on a personal level and how frustrated they are with the legislation that the federal government's been pumping out for the last 10 years.

And that's when I somehow arrived in this world of politics going, all right, who wants to help? And that's been the attitude. There are so many liberal party members on the federal level. Lisa Hefner has an incredible bill. 100% supportive of that. The liberal from Hamilton, Mountain, I think. Yeah, yeah.

Parental alienation bill, Children Protection Act, super, super important. Again, this is nonpartisan. I will cross the aisle. I've actually asked the Conservative Party to support her bill, and they have obliged and said yes.

So that's what we're trying to do here. For good pieces of legislation, it has become this matter of, drop all the political nonsense. Drop all your this, that, and the other thing. Larry Brock has even said on a podcast with me, the Shadow Minister of Justice. Like, Kate, if Sean wants to steal all my ideas,

he can have them and take the credit. The Federal Attorney General, Minister of Justice. Yeah. Yeah, if Sean Frazier wants to take all my ideas, he can have them. I don't care. I'm exhausted just trying to protect people. And that's been the attitude.

So it's just very interesting to be in the position now because when I publicly endorsed Anna Roberts and publicly endorsed Sandra Kobina and they both were successful in their in their campaigning, but the onslaught of abuse that I received online from staunch liberal leftists for voting conservative as an advocate for women's rights, which is a weird thing, kind of a weird title. I don't really particularly like it, but advocate for victims rights. and survivors, right? Yeah, that was a very bizarre, very kind of disgruntling position to be put in publicly. I'm going to let you in a little secret. There are some not very nice people on anti-social media. This just in. Thanks for the tidbit.

I want to be careful how I ask this next question because there are charges outstanding in a court in Ontario against an MPP. There is a member of the Ontario legislature who represents Sue St. Marie, who has been charged with assaulting his wife. Charges have not been proven in court. But it does prompt in me this question. Do you think there is added interest

by the current government of Ontario in this issue because this issue has potentially visited their conservative family at the legislature? yes the and it's maybe less publicly but before those charges against is it Scott Chris Scott yeah Scott before those charges were laid against him the the ball had been rolling the proverbial ball had been rolling within the conservative caucus and I again will thank Ted for having that be an entry point it's it's been in motion I think it probably doesn't help anyone other than this cause to have your party members be charged with these

offenses. And I think, I think it's, it's not something that we're weaponizing or utilizing to try to, you know, create. But I, from, from my perspective, and again, it hasn't been proven in court, you know, who I believe. But it's, it shows a prevent. evisiveness of the issue. It shows that it happens anywhere to anyone. You know, intimate partner violence and sexual assault have no, no race, no social economic status. It has no particular demographic as far as age is concerned. This is a everywhere problem. I'm asking one last question, and that is, you know, this could go one of two ways for you. this may be your new mission in life forever, that you have kind of crossed a Rubicon and

you are going to be a political activist on this issue for the rest of your life. Or you may look forward to the day when the changes you want get made and you can leave all this behind and just go back to being the actor and musician that you've always wanted to be. What do you think the future portends for you on that front? I remember when they, when the crown told me that and they had stayed the final set of charges that's the hill i die on he didn't he didn't kill me the justices didn't didn't quite kill me i don't think it's not going to happen overnight and the change is made will be yes and yes and these are systemic issues that need will need decades more worth of work and the evolution of it will be something that I will always have a stake in and always have

a hand in because I know what it's like and it is my mission to ensure that we can be as preventative as possible and that we can actually stop this from happening in the first place that we can work with young boys and men who are perpetrating this violence and address it in that early onset so that it doesn't result in having mass casualties. So I'm a lifer. Okay. I'm a lifer, Steve. I got you.

You've made your decision. But it's art and advocacy. And that's the beauty of it. It is I get to bring entertainment, if you will, and the power of the media and the power of storytelling and narrative and authenticity. and bring that to life and be, be that safe space and be that conversation piece that actually results in real change. Wish you well and thanks for your time.

Thank you, Steve.